Cop Craft

January 19, 2020

Time to change the buddy cop formula of anime a little bit. Instead of having 2 male partners in a police force like in Tiger & Bunny as well as Double Decker! Doug & Kirill, why not have a male and a female partner? Yeah, that’s what Cop Craft looks like. Everything else about them is as opposite as day and night. Total opposites. The guy is a seasoned human police officer while the female is a rookie noble alien knight. You can see where the clashes come from due to their cultural differences. Yeah, otherwise a very typical ingredient for a buddy cop genre because it is those differences that makes them clash as well as bond or get along.

Episode 1
As narrated, a hyperspace rift appeared in the middle of the ocean 15 years ago. An influx of alien culture arrived. This also mean an increase in crimes and thus the special police unit of San Teresa was established to deal with this. Kei Matoba and Rick Fury meet their clients to buy a smuggled fairy race. The duo are actually undercover police and right after the deal is made, they bust them. But one of the smugglers turned out to be a Semanian alien. He is much stronger and snaps Rick’s neck and then escapes with the fairy. Kei is left to do the worst, call Rick’s wife and inform the unfortunate. Like any normal dude, he wants to hunt down his partner’s killer but his boss, Jack Roth orders him to go pick up some VIP alien noble tomorrow since he is only one of the few detectives who can speak their language. It’s an order. Kei does so and he is shocked the VIP is a young girl. Tilarna Exedilica (that’s the very short of her very long name) is a Knight of Mirvor and she starts off as a proud brat. Kei isn’t sure her manservant but whatever. Back at HQ, Kei is not happy they are going to be partners especially an alien (that’s racist!). Tilarna’s mission is to retrieve a kidnapped fairy noble. Roth believes this partnership is necessary for all of them and will not change the partnership. Kei might be uncouth but he gets things done compared to some guy who has all the etiquette but ultimately useless. Now we see Tilarna a curious cat. Trying to touch everything (Kei’s warning is so unheeded) and asking lots of (sometimes dumb) questions. Just keep your mouth shut and follow him. Kei goes to see an informant, Bizz O’Neill and it seems the fairy has fallen into the hands of some Mexican. Then as they enter some building, Tilarna could smell danger so she transforms into her knight form and starts barging in. They catch the criminal just fresh from killing somebody. This is not the time for talk so bullets start flying first.

Episode 2
Though the duo get in each other’s way, it is also because of that they saved each other’s lives. Kei’s bullets can’t do much to this walking corpse and only Tilarna’s deep slash finally puts this corpse to eternal slumber. Tilarna can tell this person was already dead but some evil latena turned him into a living corpse (zombie?). As he is controlled by mildey (basically, magic), questioning him won’t do them any good either. Taking the body to Cecil Epps (who is also Kei’s ex), she conducts an autopsy and the only similarity she can find with the one who killed Rick is that they’re both dead before they turned zombie. Tilarna elaborates about the latena of a fairy being ingested regularly and this is the result. So basically that kind of ‘drug’ is called ‘fairy dust’ to us laymen, huh? Kei drops Tilarna at a motel for the night but is kicked out because of their no weapons policy. As a knight she cannot be without her sword. So Kei has to be the gentleman and bring her back to his place instead of letting her sleep in the park. Kei has a pet cat despite having cat allergies. Actually, Kei felt responsible for getting the cat injured as he was chasing a drug dealer. He is keeping it temporarily until someone can adopt it. No luck so far. Dennis Elbaji and Kareem meet to do business. Elbaji introduces him to Zelada who specializes in the dead. Showing him a prototype of a fairy bomb using fairy dust, he called a couple of cops here. Then he throws the bomb at them. Those who look into its light are dead instantly. Now that the cops are corpse (pun no intended), Elbaji has Zelada make them kill each other. As this is just prototype, the real deal will use the fairy’s entire body and the bomb radius can reach 5km and thousands can be controlled. Kareem wants this and will gladly pay for it. After attending Rick’s funeral service, Kei gets a call regarding a couple of missing officers. Their bodies are found dumped into the lake and as a veteran, he can tell they were killed elsewhere. Tilarna looks at the bodies and can detect use of fairy dust. Funny, if officers were using it, it would have been very obvious. They may be using gold which can be used as a catalyst to enhance latena’s power. However the best craftsmen in her world can even make this. So Kei thinks a device was used. Hence he suspects Elbaji because as a Semanian who owns a club and a dummy company, this guy is also interested in some manufacturing device. Tilarna wants him arrested now but Kei knows the red tape protocol as well as rights infringement thingy. Tilarna then excuses herself to the ladies but she is taking too long so Kei realizes she has fled. Oddly, she left her precious sword behind.

Episode 3
Tilarna has O’Neill get her some fake IDs as she enters Elbaji’s club. She is looking for that man himself and with such luck this guy shows up and wants to hit on her. So he brings her to his office and she gets down to business asking him to release the fairy. Since he doesn’t want to part with his ‘product’, negotiations ends, kill her. Tilarna has a hidden sword in her bag and cuts the bodyguards’ arms. Then Elbaji fights her and wins. Huh? A knight lost to this club owner?! There are things he would like to ask her so he won’t kill her yet and brings her to a temple in the middle of nowhere. Kei is already staking outside but since Roth says reinforcements will arrive in 30 minutes, no time to lose. Just be a hero and barge in! Tilarna manages to free herself from those agents. She looks around and stumbles into a room filled with vials of fairy parts. Elbaji shows off his latest fairy bomb and the money he could make from it. They fight once more and Tilarna is on the losing edge. Only if she had her real sword. What luck. Kei is here to throw it to her. With that, it’s like she levelled up and slashes Elbaji. She then realizes this fairy bomb is fake and the fairy is just a doll. The real one is with Zelada and he has made his backdoor escape. They go after him and as they arrest him, Roth pops up and shoots Tilarna! So this guy is in cohorts with Zelada as he lets the wizard escape. He is the one who set everything up from the start including making Tilarna as Kei’s partner just to slow him down as well as killing Rick. Because Rick was close in figuring out his true colours. Roth and Zelada have the same goal. They both hate to see humans and Semanians mix and want separation. Wow. Ross thinks by the third generation, humans will be ‘conquered’ and he fears that. He views himself as a human first than an officer. With Kei rejecting his offer to join him, then it becomes the quickest draw. Of course Kei besting Roth and shooting him in the chest. Guess he doesn’t have to fear about humans being wiped out now, eh? Kei and Tilarna race against time to stop Zelada who is most likely going to release the fairy bomb from the highest building in town. As they reach the top, Tilarna can tell that is the true fairy.

Episode 4
As they try to get the fairy, Zelada rains flames on them. Kei’s back is badly burnt while Tilarna continues to dodge. As Zelada remains hidden, Kei tries to find him via sound. So his hearing is damn good despite all that noise? Whatever. Kei shoots Zelada, enough for Tilarna to slice off his arm. He’d rather kill himself than be killed by her so he jumps off the building. So now what? How to stop the bomb? You mean they’re going to die together? Tilarna is grateful to this fairy because she helped her when she was lost in the woods. But the fairy then uses her life to save Kei. Tilarna has some healing magic but with the fairy’s life and powerful latena, Kei is healed and the city is safe. In the aftermath, they give their statement and testify in court. Then both part ways. Life returns to normal. One night Kei comes home and is shocked to see Tilarna making his place like home. So she changed her mind and decided to become his partner? Because Zelada’s body isn’t technically found and there are lots of crimes going on. Welcome aboard? On a mission to storm some smugglers’ hideout, their new chief, Bill Zimmer calls them out because Tilarna cut off a baddie’s finger. So this is also liable for lawsuit? Inside the storeroom is a coffin and upon opening it, there lies a corpse of a mummy. They take it to Cecil for autopsy but she reminds them she doesn’t specialize in old corpses. Let the archaeologists handle it. But Kei is pushy and wants a report by morning since Zimmer demands one. Because of that, Cecil and Tilarna become friends as they badmouth how much a jerk Kei is. Best part, they agree to take selfies of themselves before Kei’s dissected body after he dies! Tilarna and Kei go to interrogate the smuggler. Nothing like some Semanian beating down another just to get some info out. It seems they stole it from a graveyard in Doras Derill thinking it would be worth lots of money. Tilarna realizes the grave danger Cecil is and rushes back. Speaking of her, she has the misfortune in watching her assistant being devoured by the corpse! It’s alive! Luckily for her, Tilarna returns to fight it. She realizes this being is a vampire.

Episode 5
Tilarna can’t defeat the vampire but Kei can by spraying his fire extinguisher?! The vampire escapes so back at the police station, they receive word a truck driver has become her latest victim and thus Zimmer sends the duo to go investigate. They speak to the witnesses and since they can’t describe her clothes, Tilarna realizes that she has gained enough strength to cast some magic illusion that also serves as clothes. Tilarna traces the vampire holing up in the mall. She deduces after filling up her belly, she probably wants info on this world. They have the SWAT backing them up as they search every inch of the mall. Suddenly the vampire ambushes Kei. He got thrown a few floors down. Thank goodness for that shallow fountain breaking his fall! Kei’s comrades manage to rescue him but by that time Tilarna is missing. She fought and loss and is now a hostage. The vampire won’t kill her as she has things to ask. Learning about Earth, she thinks this world must be some prophecy as told in some ancient book called Niba. The vampire would have sucked her blood had not Kei and the SWAT barge in. How did they find them? Anyway, this vampire chick is so tough just like the last time that no amount of bullets could kill her despite taking heavy damage. They better have a truck load of ammo and never take their finger off the trigger! Of course, she escapes and they try to find her again thoroughly through the mall. Since there are no signs of her, it is deduced she must have escaped via the air ventilation that leads to the subway. In fact, some magic spell is leading her there. She meets this guy who supposedly guided her here. He hopes to serve her since his goal is Niba. However she doesn’t need his help and sucks his blood. Just in time since Kei and Tilarna are hot on her heels. Another round of fighting. Another round of pumping bullets. It gets to the point where they dice dangerously with death. Because vampire chick pins him down on the rail and a train is coming! I don’t know how Tilarna kicks Kei away but the train runs over the vampire and she got shredded to pieces. WTF?! A vampire can die from merely being run over?! What kind of low grade vampire is this?! But good riddance. Tilarna gets upset because Kei won’t thank her so she throws her repeated weak kicks at him.

Episode 6
The usual Kei-Tilarna spat. A runaway truck grazes into Kei’s car. You bet he is going to get some payback! Kei drives like a monster. Tilarna fearing for her life! Eventually Kei causes the truck to overturn. The culprit fled but all the truck’s contents spilled out. Porn magazines. As Kei talks to an officer, Tilarna take the liberty to park away his car. Apparently she didn’t apply the handbrakes so it slides down onto the path of an oncoming truck! There goes his baby! Worse, back at the office, Zimmer is scolding them for acting like cowboys and wrecking things. Kei too is so stressed up, complaining his car was damaged and that his request for a company car for business use fell on deaf ears. Yeah, these guys sure had it tough. In the end, Zimmer agrees to get him a new car but he must handle this porn case. I guess the alien world has no porn so curious Tilarna wants to know more about it. Her reaction is expected. Welcome to the real world! Since nobody is willing to help Kei on this case, I guess the only gay guy in the force got reluctantly dragged in. So Tony McBee goes see O’Neill and looks like they hit up on this young Semanian kid, Gavin. He is trying to sell porn in hopes to make some quick cash so Tony arranges to buy some for him at a designated time and place. Kei is pleased he is got a new sports car baby! Time to take her for a spin. Meanwhile Tilarna tries to learn how to drive with Cecil as her instructor. She is shocked to learn what an ex means. So Kei and Cecil were in that sort of relationship? Tilarna flusters when asked if she likes Kei. It’s not like that… Cecil thinks they look more like siblings. She tells a little secret that Kei had a sister but she died 10 years ago. Maybe that’s why she sees her resemblance in her. With all the police force undercover for this porn sting operation, Tony goes to meet Gavin for the exchange. However some rat pops up to steal the money. When Kei and the police move in, that guy takes Tony hostage and drives off. No time to waste. Tilarna now drives Kei’s car! OMG! After 1 lesson, she’s like a pro?! Driving on the wrong side of the road! Yeah, now it is Kei who is fearing for his life! You haven’t seen anything yet because Tilarna uses the car to crash into the culprit! Man, she really got balls. Miraculously, nobody died. The culprit is arrested. You think Kei wanted to give Tilarna an earful but she yells back at him that she is trying to learn about this world every day. If he doesn’t understand that, who will? So Kei now the bad guy? He apologizes for being a bit harsh. His car? Nothing like a bit of fixing up can do. And then it bursts into flames… Oh Kei, calm down, calm down… And then Tilarna makes her room (which is actually Kei’s place) into her own place. I guess Kei isn’t ‘mad’ about the loss of his car so yeah, everything is okay then!

Episode 7
Tilarna selling her body in a brothel?! Damn, she’s obedient as this guy starts going down on her. But luckily! Kei and the cops barge in. Everyone is arrested in this sting operation. Apparently Tilarna blames Kei for a second too late because that jerk touched her hair. Any later and she’d kill him! Woah! Calm down! As you’ve guessed, that guy is Coal Mozeleemay who is a mayor candidate. Like the politician he is, textbook answer to the press. Tilarna meets with Zoey who was one of the brothel girls and is released on bail. They hang out and become friends. She learns she is a photographer but I guess it was tough to earn a living that way so she sold her body. She claims she is giving up on this dirty job. Kei and the police force are trying to gather evidence to charge Mozeleemay. They have video recordings but apparently that isn’t enough these days. Kei picks up Tilarna and learns about her new friend. He advises her never to meet again since Mozeleemay will be convicted and she could be one of the witnesses to testify. If Zoey realizes Tilarna as a cop, she might feel betrayed. This causes a rift between them since their ideals of justice and the real world differ. Tilarna continues to hang out with Zoey. Then trouble hits the police department. Apparently there is a leak of the brothel’s customer name list. Some are fake, some are real. If Mozeleemay’s name comes up under the fake list, they won’t have a chance to prosecute him. The culprit is of course Zoey as she sold out the data to him. She meets Mozeleemay who pays her even more. Yup, he wants her body too. Halfway eating her out, she shows she is recording him. He gets mad and she lets him delete her recording before he kicks her out of his car. Kei and Tilarna are looking through some camera logs of those in the brothel who has access to the customer list. Other than the owner, the other turned out to be Zoey. Tilarna is shocked so she goes talk to her. Zoey seems disappointed to know she is a cop but before she could say any further, she is sniped. Kei goes after the sniper but unfortunately he dies of his wounds. Tilarna becomes a sad girl after Zoey dies. She is adamant Mozeleemay is behind this even though she has no evidence. But Zoey left a framed photo of Tilarna for her. And her camera too.

Episode 8
Kei and the cops are ready for this raid operation. Unfortunately the target spots them and tries to fly off in the plane. Can anybody seriously stop the plane? Well, Tilarna cuts it up as it crashes into the swamp. I’m amazed it didn’t explode. As Kei gathers all the items, he runs afoul of officer Hellmandes who is from CBP (Customs and Border Protection) who blames him for letting the target get away. Funny, Kei brought back all the items to his home. After he goes to sleep, seems his cat is being naughty with Tilarna. Accidentally it activates and fires a mini crossbow, shooting Tilarna in the arm. Don’t worry. She didn’t die but passes out. Next morning, Kei is shocked Tilarna is trying to get so close with him in bed while his cat is just being noisy and frantic. Because he is late, he thinks Tilarna is sick and goes off to work. At this point, we should realize that Tilarna has switched minds with the cat. Worse, Kei has taken out the garbage in which the crossbow accidentally fell in. Well, that’s not the worst part. The cat in Tilarna trying to take a dump in the kitty litter!!! Can’t unsee this!!! Tilarna the cat texts Cecil about this problem. Cecil doesn’t understand so she calls but only the cat’s purr is heard. Noticing something is wrong, she heads down there. The place is a mess and Tilarna the cat is so glad to see her. Cecil quickly grasp the situation but just before she can go out to look at the dumpster, big kitty jumps over Cecil. Man, I don’t want to think Tilarna is heavy but if that person jumps on you like that, surely you’ll pass out in no time. Kei continues his investigation and gets a stinging call from Hellmandes that 1 of the confiscated items is missing. He goes to see O’Neill but apparently his place had one hell of a party last night. Yup, lots of drunk people passing just about everywhere and a goat?! O’Neill is nowhere to be seen but he could be under this fat momma hooker! Kei has this nasty idea as he mixes some devilish hot sauce cocktail and pours it into her mouth! Sure to wake up! Eh, but isn’t O’Neill crushed further?! By the time Cecil wakes up, the garbage truck has already cleared the dumpster. Time to go after it. Could have been on its tail had not Tilarna the cat bugging Cecil to close the blinds so as not to let the world see big kitty parading her naked ass through the window!!!

Episode 9
Cecil calls the waste disposal company. Normally they don’t entertain but Cecil using her weak blackmail that they might be destroying evidence… By the time they get to the waste disposal centre and the guy doing some search which truck went to their place, just in time that truck just dump all its load into the disposal unit. Tilarna jumps into it to find the crossbow. Kei is already having a tough time trying to get O’Neill name some smuggler (that guy got stretchered in by the paramedics), then Cecil calls Kei and tells what happened since she is at a lost. Kei returns but doesn’t worry too much. Either he trusts his partner a lot or he doesn’t give a damn. Meanwhile Tilarna tries to trace the crossbow and sense its latena. She finds it but it is already heading towards the shredder! She fails to save it and the crossbow is destroyed. She laments her fate when suddenly she wakes up back at him. Hellmandes trying to hurt her real bad and demanding to know where the crossbow is because he wants to sell it for money. With Tilarna back in her own body, she starts kicking Hellmandes’ ass. Now this guy is scared. Oh, have you seen her this mad? Tilarna would have killed him for seeing her naked body but luckily Kei is back. Hellmandes is arrested and Tilarna is mad that Kei is not mad enough that she almost got violated. WTF… Meanwhile poor Cecil thinks Tilarna is a goner… One day Zimmer is having a pool party with his staffs. Then on the news that one of the mayoral candidates, Nathan Kahns got shot. This leaves everyone in shock as Zimmer calls an emergency meeting. The shooter has been identified and he is relatively a clean Semanian guy with no links to the underworld whatsoever. Normally their special division won’t get involved but Zimmer suspects something amiss. Because Zelada’s body was never found, he fears that somebody is using magic to control a corpse to do the killing. This is to stoke a race war since Kahns is a conservative human. Kei and Tilarna return to office just to identify the body. Don’t mind the beachwear. Tilarna can tell a rare form of latena coming out from the dead shooter’s body. As they leave, an officer scoffs at Tilarna. Surprisingly Kei confronts him to tell him off and make him answer why he did so. Apparently he got mad because his family voted Kahns so and he was shot by an alien. Tilarna doesn’t want Kei to continue embarrassing her but thanks him for standing up for her. They relay the news to Zimmer and now he has the headache to go tell all the departments to watch out for a certain wizard. While they dread looking for this guy, Tilarna suggests going back to basics. That is, questioning who would benefit from Kahns’ death.

Episode 10
The polarized polls has split the public. Either you’re on the humans’ side (aliens go home!) or Semanian supporter (aliens have rights too!). Kei and Tilarna head to Mozeleemay’s office to talk to him. A journalist, Kevin Randall tries to bug Kei for an interview but he has no time for him. Randall will email him some details and wants him to read it. It’s important. The duo confront Mozeleemay. He has nothing to say but apparently his wife, Marla is the one with balls and would gladly answer their questions. Of course regarding Kahns’ death, it is believed the Mozeleemay may gain a few hundred thousand voters. Marla replies that even if that is true, their only other mayoral candidate, Domingo Tourte stands to gain even more. As for using corpse as puppets, they should be aware that normal Semanians can’t use magic. The cops leave and they can tell that Marla is the one wearing the pants. As they are about to head to Tourte’s place, a gunshot is heard. Mozeleemay has been shot. Kei heads to the broadcast room to find the culprit. I am surprised that computer AI is able to pinpoint the kind of people Kei is looking for! I mean, right down to their body actions! F*cking precise?! So they manage to pinpoint to this Semanian guy. They look for him and they see him trying to coolly leave the place. When they try to arrest him, he fights back. Miraculously, the crowd isn’t injured so they start chasing after him. They manage to corner him but at this point he is already fatally wounded. His last word is “Leeze” before kicking the bucket. Shockingly, he reverts to human form and Tilarna realizes that this is transformation magic. However he cannot be a corpse puppet because she fought him and was using his own free will. Is it possible for humans to learn Semanian magic? Well, if Semanians can learn human technology, the reverse is true. Then they examine his gun, also transformed into something else. That was how he snuck it in. If you noticed why the whole place is deserted, yeah, I don’t know why either but the FBI arrives. Their jurisdiction. Get out. Back at office, Tilarna explains to her colleagues this vaifaht steel that the gun was made of. In short, it can be moulded into anything simple but it takes very talented craftsmen to do so. Hence something complicated like a gun is impossible for them to even do. Hence there could be a human and Semanian working together on this. Zimmer has the rest of the team investigate further on this but wants Kei and Tilarna to interview Tourte tomorrow. Meanwhile the protests on both sides continue to grow fiercely.

Episode 11
Kei and Tilarna discuss about Tourte who is a very right wing politician. I don’t know if this guy worked for Nike before because his campaign line: “Just! Do it!”. Yeah… Interviewing Tourte, he is upfront in telling how Semanians are lazy and to a point that they love Earth’s culture, the reason why they don’t want to go back despite humans have offered them so many options to return. He didn’t mince his words to tell them to obey Earth’s laws if they want to stay. Or get out! This of course upsets Tilarna but Kei asks him a question if he had to choose between being an Earthling or politician, which would it be? Without skipping a beat, he replies a politician and would have done the same if he was born in the other world. This has Kei thinking about his answer because his former boss, Roth definitely came up with a totally opposite answer. A couple of female police officers manage to get the identity of the assassin. He is Ethan Dole and is supposed to be dead. He was once from the military and went missing many years back in some Semanian operation. As the protests grows, Tilarna is shocked that Marla is running for candidacy. Yeah, you’ve spent so much money on the campaign trail, it’ll be a waste to bow out, right? You’d think Tourte is going to win this election unopposed, eh? Politics, people. Kei gets a call from Randall who keeps bugging him to see the email he sent. Kei checks but sees nothing. Panic, he wants to meet seeing it is utmost importance. A paranoid Randall shows Kei a picture of Marla meeting up and having an affair with somebody else. From the description, that person is Dole. So how is Kei related to this? Randall knows he arrested Mozeleemay at the brothel and thinks he is somewhat connected. This guy gets more paranoid thinking somebody is watching and out to get him. And then the FBI surrounds them. Tilarna can sense something wrong about them. They’re all dead. Except for the one leading the team, Ronald Chan. All of them are cuffed and thrown into the back of the van. Tilarna and Kei are shocked to see that Zelada is still alive and well.

Episode 12
Kei and Tilarna are put to sleep. Back at the base, Zelada speaks with Tilarna while Chan interrogates Kei. I guess it saves time as they reveal they are in cohorts together as their goals align. Yes, they don’t want humans and Semanians to coexist. The original plan was to kill Kahns and Tourte so that Mozeleemay can be the mayor as he is easy to be manipulated. However Ethan decided to go against that and killed Mozeleemay. It is hinted Ethan could have been trained by Tilarna’s master as “Leeze” means master in their language. Zelada wants war because he feels that Earth’s culture has corrupted the Semanians. Chan wants the photo Randall had that Kei uploaded because he wants to blackmail Marla. Kei won’t cooperate so he beats him up. Perhaps he got his guard down so Kei fights back and manages to suffocate him with his thighs! As he leaves, he sees Randall’s corpse in a bag. Tilarna mocks Zelada of being afraid of change. That’s why he is giving all this sort of excuse and resorting to terrorism. Despite this place is a filth, Tilarna believes she can find something that will shine. Kei must have been playing Resident Evil and a pro in it as he fights his way through those FBI zombies! Does he have unlimited ammo cheat code? Just in time before Zelada is going to kill Tilarna. Zelada makes himself invisible and this becomes a game of hide and seek. Kei manages to free Tilarna but she is too weak to fight. Eventually, Kei’s smart thinking has him shoot the sprinklers. Now that they can see Zelada’s outline, Tilarna uses Kei’s gun to pump lead into the old geezer and Kei finishes him off by decapitating him with Tilarna’s sword. Good riddance. In the aftermath, Kei asks Tilarna’s opinion if he should hand over this photo of Marla. She will get exposed and lose the sympathy votes, making Tourte win by a landslide. Or he could play dumb. Tilarna says just to hand in the evidence. She doesn’t care who the mayor of this city is because this is still a good city and there are still some good people in it. And most importantly, because Kei is here. In the aftermath, Marla is arrested and Tourte is sworn in as mayor. Life returns to normal. Yeah, all the protests and street fighting died down but the vices are still there. Back to business as usual. That racist cop apologizes to Tilarna so I guess they’re even now. Humans, Semanians, yeah we’re all the same!

Copped Out…
So this is how it ends? Feels like something is missing… Feels pretty odd that everything resumes to normal after election season is over. Like as though everyone got the message to deal with the winner and continue with their daily lives. I suppose the sins will stay more or less the same whoever is in charge, huh? Kei and Tilarna continuing to be partners for the sake of both the futures of their worlds, trying to tell us that everything is not as bad as it seems. There is always light in the darkest of darkness. Do not lose hope. So you see, human culture not only corrupted other alien cultures with its decadence, we also get to virtue signal that this is all part of development and civilization. Yeah, gotta bring more alien civilizations to our world and let them get a taste of our fun! Any troubles, just let the San Teresa special unit deal with them!

I don’t want to say that the stories are really that boring but it is nothing that interesting either. I mean, they feel just really run of the mill because what else can you have when dealing with aliens from another world getting involved with all sorts of vice and sins that we humans do pretty well? We got the case of smuggling fairies to the case of assassinating mayoral candidates. Pretty ordinary stories if you think about it. Nothing really spectacular or blow your mind. I feel that if they were better written and had better pacing, the little story arcs might be interesting to watch but alas they weren’t so I guess that’s why this series is just passable and mediocre to some. When you have many episodes that leave viewers in suspense especially on cliff-hangers, that is really one way to kill the mood. I know many animes are guilty of doing this but this series only has a dozen episodes and for example, when that vampire chick revived and started attacking, suddenly “To be continued…”. Like, WTF?! It was somewhat about to get exciting and then they cut it off! Next episode for those who are still interested…. Man, what a killjoy. And then some episodes feel like fillers and don’t really make sense. Like Tilarna getting swapped with Kei’s cat. Weird…

One of the worse factors that contributes to the mediocrity of this series is how not enough emphasis is given to flesh out the lore of the Semanian alien world. It’s like as though they are not really important in the first place. From what I can tell, the Semanian world is pretty backwater and not advanced despite having magic. Why is it that other worlds always have magic but lacking in technology? But with San Teresa having all the cool human stuffs, it is no wonder why aliens do not want to go home and stay here and continue to have fun. I mean, planet Earth has porn!!! PORN, PEOPLE!!! PORN!!!! Ah yes, even aliens share the same carnal desires. We living beings aren’t any much different, huh? After all, humans and Semanians look pretty much about the same and the only significant difference is their mini faux elf ears. Sort of. So having no real background or history of the Semanian side, it makes us not really wanting to care or even sympathize with aliens. I mean, really. We don’t. Heck, even that narration about San Teresa being a melting pot for both civilizations feel rushed. Here’s the setting. Nothing convoluted. Now let’s get on with the story. To hell with those Semanians. That’s racist! And other Semanian terms feel like just like plot convenience. Vaifaht steel what again?

This show couldn’t have been released in a more politically incorrect era. Because I’m sure with humans and aliens at odds at each other here, it is hard not to think that the Semanians are somewhat an allegory for illegal aliens, especially with the influx of migrants from other parts of the world into American and Europe. This gets more politically charged up with the final arc especially the race for San Teresa’s mayoral position. Local humans want those aliens out but those aliens screaming they have, uhm, whatever rights they have too. And then racial clashes. Oh yeah. Why does it look so familiar with today’s world? And I can’t help think that Tourte could be a metaphor for the current US president, Donald Trump. I mean, Domingo Tourte. Donald Trump. DT. Geddit?! Not so obvious because Tourte doesn’t sport that trademark orange bad hair day of his. Also, Tourte is very brash and right wing, reminds you of a certain orange man, no? Hmm… “Just! Do it!” sounds like “Make America Great Again!” if you look at it at a certain angle (because Make San Teresa Great Again would’ve been too obvious, alas MSTGA doesn’t have a nice ring to it). HHHMMMMM… And also, Trump has no other real candidates who can challenge him for his 2020 re-election… For now… HHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!! And is Marla like Hillary???!!! Because Mozeleemay is like Bill Clinton getting caught with his pants down once… HOLY SH*T!!! Better shut up now if I know what’s good for myself.

However, the thing that intrigued me is the Farbani language that the Semanians speak. I can’t seem to find online what kind of language on Earth they based on. Yeah, maybe my Google skills aren’t so good. To make it all look authentic, some dialogues are spoken in this Farbani language with Japanese subtitles. My sceptical guts tell me that they didn’t go all the way just to create a new language just for this series. And of course they don’t sound like they are spouting random gibberish as I feel there is a system in how their language is spoken. So I’m just really curious what kind of language is this really based on? I hope somebody can enlighten me. Good thing is that I’m not that and I picked up a few Farbani words myself. Rakebye. Rock-a-bye what? That’s baka AKA idiot for you who are still guessing. Heh… No, not any reference to that Shawn Mullins song.

A big fail for this series is how they depict to us the relationship between Kei and Tilarna. I believe that the story and other settings of this world have been side-lined so as to give this pair the focus but even that, they failed to save the series. At first, it was somewhat amusing to see both of them from different backgrounds trying to get along. You know, they’re new to each other, some communication and cultural problems. He is a tough veteran cop. She is a naïve Jedi knight. Both having although same sense of justice but different approaches to it. There is some dynamism between them but ironically the more episodes I see them together, the less I feel that they have actually bonded. I don’t know, their partnership seems somewhat superficial. Sure, they do care for each other in some ways but I just don’t feel that buddy cop thingy between them. You think Tiger and Bunny or even Doug and Kirill were bad enough in this department, boy, I have bad news for this pair for you then.

Some cute and funny moments in between them but nothing that makes me want to say that their partnership is solid as a rock. After all, Kei has been through his fair share of sh*t and seen lots of things including the death of his previous partner before his eyes. Then we have Tilarna whom you can tell is a bit naïve because of how emotional she gets when things don’t turn out the way she expected it to be. You can tell by the volume and emotion in her voice. And then Kei is like he has that I-don’t-give-a-sh*t tone in his voice because he knows better than to waste his breath and argue at the same pitch. In other words, Kei sounds like he doesn’t care but remember, he has been in this line for donkey years so sometimes taking a frontal approach and rushing things may not be the best idea. Despite having the focus a lot on the duo, there are a lot of other juicy details that were not really fleshed out. A lot of blanks to be filled in. For instance, remember what Cecil said about Kei having a sister who died 10 years ago? It would be interesting to know if a Semanian had a hand in that. What about Tilarna’s life as a noble? How did she end up where she is now?

So you see, when your main pair of characters already have this sort of problem in the character development segment, what about the other characters? They are worse. You don’t even care about them. Because I believe there are many other colleagues under this special department but they do not even get a sliver of screen time. I mean, we have Tony the gay guy, his chubby partner (what’s his name again?) and that pair of chicks too whose names I still can’t remember. Like, they don’t even matter unless the script says it’s their turn to do something. Like the final story arc whereby we see them doing something but by that time, it’s already too late. This series has been primarily Kei and Tilarna and then to suddenly see these minor characters thrown into the limelight… Just weird. Uh huh. Damned if they do, damned if they don’t. And Zimmer is like your typical black cop boss. Loud in your face and can be verbally abusive but cares a lot for his men.

The one thing that bugs me is how Kei gets to have a new car. Twice! I am not sure if there is a special provision and budget allocation for this special unit but man, he does seem to get a brand new convertible sports car. Twice! F*ck, I thought he would get back at least his old model or some lousy second hand car but damn, this police department upgraded his car! Maybe it is the company’s car but who knows? Kei is driving it all the time so I’m going to think it belongs to him. Wow. All those crying and begging of OT must have really gotten Zimmer to just get him one and shut him up and do his job, huh? Unfortunately this won’t even happen to me in real life and I risk getting fired… Kei, you lucky bastard! You better take care of that new car!!!

Cecil being Kei’s ex? I guess it must be awkward for former lovers to be still looking at each other working at the same place but I guess they’ve got to be professional. Hence, if you are hoping if there is some sort of Kei x Tilarna romance, don’t even bet a cent on it because from the looks of it, I can tell that it won’t happen. Humans and Semanians can’t mix! That’s racist! Anyway, it would have also been interesting to note what happened between Kei and Cecil that didn’t work out. So sometimes I feel that both of them dedicating their hours on their jobs is like as though they are trying to run away and erase that whatever bad chapter in their fleeting moment. Bad romance? No wonder Kei won’t make this same mistake with Tilarna and plus, she might remind him more of his late sister than a lover. Rakebye.

The antagonists of the series also feel weak. It feels like they are the villains of the episode and nothing more. I thought Elbaji will be the final boss or antagonist or something. Nope. He got sliced dead. That vampire chick might be the final boss. Because you know, vampire clan. And then she too dies! Really? So what she said about that Niba book thingy, was that all just red herring? That’s why I said they should have developed the setting better instead of this half-baked thingy that don’t even matter. I didn’t think Hellmandes would be it either. But he’s such a sneaky guy I can tell he has bad intentions the moment he first popped up but I didn’t think he would get owned that easily by Tilarna. All bark and no bite, huh? Mozeleemay? Dead. Kahns? Dead. Marla? Obviously this chick is the one who hired an assassin to pop Zoey. Now facing prison time. And yeah, Zelada. Oh Zelada. Truly the ‘final’ boss of the series. Literally speaking. Aren’t you supposed to be surprised when the final comes around? Like as though once he is dead, it is endgame for this series. I mean, Kei got his revenge for his ex-buddy Rick so what else more?

On a trivial note, I wonder if the episode titles are parodies of other pop culture. For example, this obvious one, “Smells Like Toon Spirits” is of course based off one of Nirvana’s most famous songs. “Need For Speed” could be based on that video game of the same name. Could “Girls On Ice” be a parody of Yuri On Ice? I wonder if “In The Air Tonight” is based on Luck Be In The Air Tonight. I don’t see how an English nursery rhyme character could be in “Cock Robin, John Doe”. Maybe these episode titles are just random and I’m just overthinking.

Action wise, there are some action sequences. Mostly passable and some really exaggerating to the point it looks comical. Like when Tilarna became a pro driver and trashed his car. Yeah, that was like so WTF. Other than that, Tilarna can’t do more unless she’s in her special uniform and then using her sword to slash. Kei on the other hand only uses his gun. He has got to be one lucky guy because there are scenes where baddies just spray bullets and they all missed. I don’t think having a few gory and bloody scenes would help but yeah, having the setting of a city with vice and sins, this is only to be expected.

For the art and animation, they look pretty okay and it is without doubt that once more that a lot of things here look very American. Especially some of the characters who typically have that American style look like Zimmer (hey, doesn’t he look like Neil deGrasse Tyson?) and characters like Kei having very much this Japanese anime look. As said, Semanians other distinguishing feature is their elf-like ears and it is how you tell them apart from normal humans. Also, is it just me that Semanians have this one kind look on their face? I don’t know. Like a mild Down Syndrome or something! Oh sh*t! I don’t know, the more I look at Tilarna, the more… Forget it. And for those of you who can’t find Carmen Sandiego all this time, be glad to know that she turned into an old Semanian wizard named Zelada in this series. No, seriously. Sometimes the animation can be so low quality, for example when Ethan died, he didn’t have the face of a dead man or a corpse! I mean, he’s got that chillin’ look. Dude, WTF?! This anime is animated by Millepensee who did Teekyuu, the newer season of Berserk and Wake Up Girls.

The other reason why I decided to check this series is out is Kenjiro Tsuda as the voice of Kei. Yeah, I may start to like this guy’s low dreamy voice so I guess him being cast as Kei, I think he fits his character very well. The other casts I recognized are Hochu Ohtsuka as Zelada, Shinichiro Miki as Hellmandez as well as Mai Nakahara and Marina Inoue as those couple of police officers under Zimmer’s department. And that was Rie Tanaka as Zoe? The other casts include Mayu Yoshioka as Tilarna (Mayu in Wake Up Girls), Fumiko Orikasa as Cecil (Rukia in Bleach), Ryousuke Takahashi as Tony (Calibur in SSSS.Gridman) and Shinpachi Tsuji as Zimmer (Makarov in Fairy Tail). I have mixed feelings for the opening theme, Rakuen Toshi by Masayoshi Ooishi. This is quite a very jazzy and lively samba piece and sometimes I wonder if it really fits the pacing of the series. But hearing this song seems to somewhat remind me of Barry Manilow’s Copacabana. The ending theme… Meh. Connected by Mayu Yoshioka is a hard rock piece and definitely not suitable for this series at all. I don’t really like the frenzy rock pace at all (certain lines sound cacophonic) and I’m wondering if this song is a reflection of Tilarna’s real soul. Then there is this BGM that has that Indian or Arabic tune to it. Find it very weird…

Overall, this series could have been a lot better had the producers put more effort into the story and its characters. There were things that were not clearly explained or left forgotten, making it feel it was all unnecessary red herring and worst, Kei and Tilarna’s dynamic relationship failed to make an impact. And because all that supposed good stuff didn’t happen, it came out just another one of those ubiquitous mediocre animes. It also has some potential in thought provoking issues like race and the dark side of humanity but it turned out to be just some really ordinary if not less than stellar buddy cop series. I read online that the main cause of this production being produced below par is the budget. Yup. Eventually it all boils down to money. Unfortunately, first impressions count so I don’t think this would be getting a review for a second season. Hence, bye-bye… Rakebye.