Hangyakusei Million Arthur

January 5, 2020

Excalibur throughout history has been the most famous legendary sword wield by the famous King Arthur of Britain. Countless tales and fiction are written about him and his sacred sword. So who in the world would really go all out to destroy it?! Well, in Hangyakusei Million Arthur, apparently the power of this sword went berserk and some freak miracle cloned million copies of it. Albeit many of them have a few slight variations in powers and effects. With the history of Britain being distorted by this, hence a group of 6 Arthurs from the future are sent back to the past to destroy all of them. Yup, count them. One million of them. Boy, this is going to take a while. I suppose there isn’t any repossessing or recalling service in Britain for Excaliburs, huh? Oh well, gotta do it the hard way and destroy them all one by one. Yup, count them again. One million of them, baby.

Episode 1
We see our sextet Arthurs: Danchou, Renkin, Yamaneko, Tekken, Kakka and Rurou taking on other rogue Arthurs and their fake Excaliburs while their respective fairies Nuckelavee, Bodach, Coupy, Titania, Brigitte and Bethor only watch. Flashback shows they are from the future. Distortions of Excaliburs were detected and causing to distort time in the past and future. Hence they are sent back to destroy every single last one of them all over Britain. There are a million of them, you know? Danchou is the leader of the group as she meets the rest who aren’t too amused with her. Because she thinks by being flirty or acting like a clown would do the trick in breaking the ice? Yeah, she’s just end up embarrassing herself. And also, nobody really likes her. Uh huh. You screwed up. It’s not your charm… But obviously the idiot doesn’t give up and thinks of inviting everyone to a home party. Too bad nobody notices the invitation she slipped in. Because they are busy investigating the thousands of Arthurs who are said to be hunting down the Arthur hunters (the sextet). Danchou, you need to get over why nobody came to your party and instead focus on this hordes of Arthurs who are coming. Obviously even with overwhelming numbers, our Arthur sextet could easily take out all those generic fake Arthurs and their fake Excaliburs. Not even a dragon can stop them! 10,000 of a million is only 1%. Long way to go but somebody has got to do the job. And can Danchou cut out her stupid ice breaker already? Don’t react lest you want to lose…

Episode 2
What did I say about not responding to Danchou’s sexy ice breakers? Tekken found out the hard way… Renkin despite her child-like stature, is the most knowledgeable Arthur. So to prove she is an adult, when the system detects a large amount of distortion in some area, she heads there herself. Danchou wants to go after her but the rest put their faith that Renkin is more than prepared if she decided to go herself. Of course Danchou went and finds Renkin. Still safe. Until a group of ruffians want to… Date Danchou?! I guess there are people with horrible tastes… So while Danchou dates them (really?), Renkin does research at the library. Since she meets a nice man, Bodach though romance is blossoming and lets them be. Danchou can see through those ruffians that they are Arthurs. Date plan failed. Attack! And lost! Danchou then realizes if she wasn’t the only one being targeted… Yup, that man whom Renkin is with is also an Arthur. She is kidnapped as he reveals his nefarious plans to take out the sextet one by one. Bodach tries to help but ends up locking herself in her own magic coffin. Bummer. Yeah, it makes her look so stupid. The man becomes despicable as his glasses shaped Arthur can also see through clothes! Lolicon!!! Danchou busts in to save Renkin before he could make the loli cry. Of course Danchou being an exhibitionist herself isn’t fazed when he sees everything through her. Because he relies heavily on sight, this is his weakness as both Danchou and Renkin bust his glasses and ass. In the end, Danchou and Renkin are friends. You think Danchou has an ulterior motive of using those glasses to see Yamaneko’s body but too bad as pointed out, only the owner can use it. Such a waste but thank goodness.

Episode 3
With simultaneous distortion readings at different places, Danchou hatches a scheme to become friends with Yamaneko by rigging the raffle to decide the teams. Of course Yamaneko sees through her and the plan fails. Yamaneko gets Renkin while Danchou ends up with Rurou. But this episode focuses on Tekken and Kakka. They head to a mining town to investigate but get caught up and become miners. While muscle brain Tekken enjoys it, obviously magician kid Kakka is all out breath. They also learn many miners come from other countries because invaders attacked their mines and they had to flee. Thanks to the generosity of the mining company’s president, Leicester, everyone is happy with things as they are. So as they continue their mining day job, they also investigate Leicester’s office. Having enough evidence, when Leicester is giving his speech to his men one morning about the booming business, they reveal the evidence that Leicester has been selling those mined minerals to the invaders to be made as weapons. This is why their country is spared from attacks. The miners are disillusioned but lost all respect when Leicester shows his true colours. Yeah, he summons an invader but luckily our heroes took out some of its parts so it won’t work. Leicester is an Arthur himself as he has strong drills as his Excalibur. But nothing beats Tekken’s fist of course and he is defeated. In the end, the miners return to their countries and drive out the invaders. With Tekken and Kakka being close enough, the rest think they are in a gay relationship and let them be.

Episode 4
When an Excalibur is detected in a town that grows takuan, Yamaneko surprisingly volunteers. Danchou thought it’s her chance to get close to her but damn she loses the lottery to Rurou. This town is about to celebrate its annual takuan contest but it’s like a ghost town. They witness a sniper shooting people and turning them into takuan! Roy saves them and in hiding he explains his sister, Loretta is behind this for revenge. Previously a year ago, an outsider who knew nothing about takuan won the contest and left their father in shame as he was the best takuan farmer. Disillusioned, Loretta left and during her journey she found an Excalibur. Thus she shoots anyone who is planning on holding this contest. Yamaneko and Rurou want the contest to carry on and they will be bait to lure her out. They thought of detecting her heat signature but she is smart enough to use a fake. Loretta begins sniping the townspeople. This scene triggers Yamaneko’s trauma since snippets show her family faced the firing squad. This distraction causes Rurou to protect her from a snipe and in turn he gets turned into a takuan. I don’t think blasting the mountain would do her any good. Loretta’s gone. To make up for her mistakes, Yamaneko once again heads out to lure Loretta out. Just when Loretta thought she got a clean hit on her, turns out Yamaneko is wearing a vest of takuan! Can’t turn takuan when it’s already a takuan! Yamaneko destroys her Excalibur and everyone in town reverts back to normal. Roy reveals the truth the outsider switched her takuan with their dad’s and by the time the townspeople discovered it, she already skipped town. After Loretta apologizes, the contest goes ahead with no further interruptions. As for Rurou and Yamaneko, they got a bunch of takuan. So eat up! There’s a lot more, way more from where that came from.

Episode 5
An Excalibur is detected in some all-girls’ elite high school. Kakka thought of heading down there to investigate but looks like Danchou is joining him. Heck, she makes him wear a girl’s uniform and he doesn’t protest? Oh well, this makes it easier to infiltrate. Kakka becomes popular with everyone on his first day. Danchou, Brigitte and Nuckelavee too but they’re more like fooling around rather than doing anything serious. Kakka then bumps into this art club president, Milia. Kakka notices various weapon props and could one of these be Excalibur? Unfortunately Milia and her club members turn Kakka into their paint model. This guy can’t say no, can he? Their horny creative turned on so they make him do sexy poses in various outfits. This is art! Finally he decides to escape but they corner him. That is when Milia uses her giant Excalibur paintbrush to trap him. She then reveals she knew he was a boy all along and set this up. Her ‘tragic’ story is that a cute boy betrayed her. Since art will never betray, she decides to capture a young boy’s prettiness before he starts betraying. After some tickling fanservice, she unleashes a couple of cross-dressing girls to flirt with Kakka. The humiliation lasts long enough for Danchou to bust in and easily knock everyone out. Seeing the perverted art Milia made, Kakka quickly destroys her Excalibur. However in the aftermath, Milia submits a humiliating art of Kakka and won first prize! Yeah, he forgot to destroy her art after destroying her Excalibur. More infuriating is that Danchou’s late appearance was because she was enjoying seeing Kakka’s humiliation! This guy has no more dignity left… Meanwhile Brigitte and Nuckelavee continue to become popular high school girls… Life must be good there, huh?

Episode 6
Swimsuit episode! Oh yeah! Our girls are enjoying themselves at a spa resort that belongs to Kakka’s estate. Of course there is trouble as there is a swimsuit thief swiftly stealing the tops and bottoms of the patrons’ swimsuit. Hence it is Danchou and the girls’ duty to catch the thief before this resort’s reputation plummet amidst the growing complaints. They separate into teams to sniff out the pervert but some of them fell victim. During the swimsuit competition, Danchou almost got hold of the culprit but he is faster than Sonic and she loses him. However noticing a hook has her have a good idea where this guy comes from. At the boring fishing section, they see a very strange man (because everyone else is just so boring looking) and true enough, Sander is the one stealing them. His Excalibur is a fishing rod that enables him to fish out from a distance. He claims he is doing it for Gaira, his brother’s sake. Long ago, Gaira was diagnosed with an illness. He wanted a star so Sander went on a journey to look for one but found this Excalibur. Then he fished in a star. A swimsuit with a star pattern. Since this isn’t what he wanted, he continued fishing but only fished swimsuits. And Gaira supposedly died from all the swimsuits suffocating him? The girls are shocked that Sander continues to do this because it became his hobby and fetish. Give back those tears! Danchou faces off with him and despite getting her top reeled, Renkin uses her hands to cover it. Hand bra defence! For an exhibitionist, she sure is worried getting naked. Sander tries to run away seeing he has got what he wanted but Danchou feels insulted because he isn’t interested what is underneath. After Sander is owned, it seems the real monster comes out. So this barbarian is Gaira? So he didn’t die and all that swimsuit suffocation instead turned him into a much worse monster? Yeah, he likes to fish the bottoms. Combining her might with some of the girls, they put him down, destroy their Excaliburs and end this reign of terror. Now they can go back to enjoying the rest of the day without the worry of their modesty being outraged.

Episode 7
Rurou is being washed away down the river! The gang gathers to look for him but Renkin tells them Rurou asking them to take care of Lucy. Not that anybody knows, not even in Bethor’s database. Rurou wakes up in the house of a young lady, Rose. He has been sleeping for 3 days. He finds it odd that she is too young to be the lord of this small territory so she explains her parents died in a carriage accident when she was young but they left her a beautiful rose garden. So helps distribute them to the villagers as its fragrance brings happiness. Hmm… Rose rose up to give roses. Yeah, I know. Bad pun, sorry… Then here comes the typical scumbag lord of the next region, Dokudami. He wants to marry Rose and of course she rejects his proposal for the umpteenth time. After all, rumours are rife he was the one who killed her parents. Look at that suspicious looking spanner Excalibur. Rose tries to get him off her back by having Rurou pretend to be her boyfriend. Dokudami gets mad and wants to fight. Rurou easily destroys his Excalibur and sends him fleeing like a coward. With Rurou’s heroics, they really think he should get hitched with Rose. Yeah, she thinks so too… However Rurou claims he only stirs up bad memories for her since she keeps talking about her parents. Soon Rurou reunites with his Arthurs. They are shocked to find this village because history goes after Rose’s parents’ died, she fell into depression and the village withered away as the people left. Rurou was sure he destroyed an Excalibur but you never know there could be more than one… Then Dokudami returns for revenge. While the other Arthurs keep him at bay, Rurou confronts Rose. Her Excalibur is a pair of shears. It brings life to anything it cuts but at the expense of sucking that life from other areas. Rose knows about his duty and realizes what is lost cannot be returned. She lets him break her Excalibur. Damn, I feel so bad about it. While the Arthurs defeat Dokudami and his army, Rurou destroys Rose’s Excalibur. Everything withers away… So sad… In the aftermath, the rest try to cheer him up. But they ask about Lucy. A wounded bird whom he found and tried to put back in the nest. But he slipped and fell into the river. Why do they look so disappointed now and Bethor wishing they never found him?!

Episode 8
Magical girl Arthurs? This sh*t is getting weirder. With Danchou and Tekken out sick because they challenged each other naked in the snow (don’t ask), Rurou watches over them so the rest head to a town whereby its famous wall kept out invaders. However there are no walls but 3 magical girl Arthurs easily destroying the robot invaders with their magic. They are also targeting our Arthur hunters as they know they are out to destroy the Excalibur wands. They fight but our Arthurs lose. Thanks to their fairies, they manage to escape with the skin of their teeth. Then they read a fairytale story that seems to mirror what’s happening. Uh huh. Town being attacked by invaders, girls pray to God, got the magic needed to bring back the smiles. With the Arthur trio facing off with the magical girls, the townspeople are sceptical because if their magical girls are defeated, who is going to protect them? Oh well. Here’s the second rematch of Arthur hunters vs magical girl Arthurs. And no interrupting or attacking until they finish their introduction! This time our heroes know their moves and are able to counter attack nicely. Before their Excaliburs can be destroyed, here comes the invaders. Time to call it a truce and work together to defeat the invaders. Their cooperation brings down the invaders but here comes the big mother invader. Ironically the magical girls got their Excaliburs destroyed by it. How will they protect the town without magic now? Then all the adults and kids rush out to protect them. I know this isn’t going to do anything much but I am thinking this is to show this symbolic metaphor that the people are the town’s true walls. Our Arthurs are so touched that now they go all out and destroy the mother invader at full force. There. Day saved. In the aftermath, the magical girls decide to get stronger by becoming Renkin’s disciples. Can this little girl act like a big sister?

Episode 9
While Tekken, Kakka and Yamaneko are on their way back, they stumble upon an idol, Kaguya. It seems she is running away from obsessed fans who want to just show their love. Because their pen lights are detected as Excaliburs, our Arthurs waste no time in defeating time. Easy. That would normally be the end of it but Kaguya doesn’t want to be left alone. What if more rabid fans like them attack her? Hence she wants them to serve as her bodyguard until she gets to her concert venue. Being the simpleton, Tekken agrees to see this through. Kaguya might be a brat and boss around, but the fairies detect her to be a knight. She admits she is one and an AI that was born to work under Arthur although currently she isn’t serving one right now. Kaguya has beef with Tekken. Although he compliments her, he also mentions her bad points with brutal honesty. So after beating up a doodled Tekken face on her pillow, she decides to go take a shower and strips. But Tekken enters. Oops. Wrong room. My bad. Bye. Hence she is going to make that guy pay. So next morning when they hear a scream from her room, they rush over to see the window open. Tekken instantly searches her throughout town. Yamaneko notices something amiss because everything happened too fast. True enough, Kaguya is hiding under the bed. She comes clean about wanting to get back at Tekken for shaming her. She apologizes but no biggies for Tekken who is glad she is safe. Later they go face off with the hordes of those fatty fans and destroy their Excaliburs. Is looking alike a dress code for them? That night, a mad doctor who is an obsessed fan of hers paralyses her. He is also interested in her knight genes. She ekes out a call for help. Normally the rest would think this is a prank but Tekken doesn’t think so and goes after the mad doctor. Despite the mad doctor sounding threatening, Tekken easily defeats him in one punch. Wow. So easy. The mission is done once Kaguya arrives at her concert. She is sad at them leaving and invites them to listen. However Tekken isn’t a music fan and passes. Kaguya saw this coming and accepts. Tekken might not be acting like a gentleman but he thinks music is for those who truly wants to hear them. But not hearing Kaguya sing, he can imagine how her songs sound like.

Episode 10
Our Arthur hunters are at it again. Destroying a whole bunch of Arthurs and their Excaliburs. And let’s check the tally how many are left. WHAT?! 900,000 left???!!! Meanwhile a group of shady Arthur bosses are discussing on how to deal with them. They’ll eventually meet since their goal is to destroy all Excaliburs. The next time our Arthur hunters do their usual, it seems those Arthurs abandon their Excaliburs and run away. They feel odd and suspicious because it is somewhat insulting for an Arthur to just abandon their Excalibur. Then they discover that all the remaining 900,000 Arthurs have banded together and are going to take them out! Those who ran away were just decoys while the rest gather more Excaliburs. So yeah, the actual figure is more than 900,000. Hey. Why are they worried? It’s not like they’ve never taken on such huge number before, right? RIGHT?! Oh sh*t. From Tekken’s simple solution to just fight them to Rurou’s surprising answer to run away, Danchou wants them to give her until tomorrow to make a decision. Hence everybody has a sleepless night. Next day, Danchou’s plan is to become a decoy to let others run away. But the rest saw through this plan and will fight alongside her. Even Yamaneko admits she prefers her idiotic Danchou than one who acts out of character! So okay guys, let’s do this! As usual, thanks to those dumb low level Arthurs, this looks easy. However as you can see because of the immense numbers, our Arthur hunters soon get tired and that is the plan of those shady Arthur bosses to go in for the kill. But wait! Suddenly divine intervention?! Pharsalia drops down from the sky and didn’t expect the Arthur hunters to be so weak. She decimates the others in a single blow! OMG! WTF she’s so overpowered?! Is she God?! When other Arthurs flee, Pharsalia turns to the Arthur hunters. She warns them she might have saved them today but if they can’t entertain her, she’ll crush them instead. So yeah. Time for Danchou and her motley crew to get serious go after those who got away.

Season 2

Episode 1
You know it’s a dream when Danchou is respected by everyone and Yamaneko even wants to get yuri with her! Reality is much worse. Yeah, Danchou trying to make out with Nuckelavee in her sleep! That’s not the bad news. Because reality hits when Nuckelavee points out everyone has left! Only letters left behind. Some addressing her pathetic leadership. And then Pharsalia visits her. She rubs salt into wounds as she finds it funny a leader with no followers. Pharsalia reveals that because she gets bored easily, she will wipe out history. In fact, that is her duty. She will decide if an era is worth preserving. Because Danchou is so amusing, she’ll let this era go on for now. So stay interesting. After she leaves, Titania comes to complain to Danchou about Tekken. Yeah, that muscle brain has been training ever since. He blames himself for being weak. Can’t get an idiot to rejoin him? Play his game! Because Danchou asks when he will turn stronger so as to defeat Pharsalia. Won’t fight a fight you can’t win? Is that the Tekken she knows? It’s not like him to say that without even trying! Yeah a punch in his face down the cliff should change his mind… That did the trick. With Tekken rejoining her, they find Renkin in the next town. She is firm she won’t rejoin them as she will not fight a losing battle. That’s that. Actually, Renkin has been trying to research a way to defeat Pharsalia. Fairy Combine? Sounds like a perverted move that Danchou will do to defile Nuckelavee. When a rogue Arthur targets our Arthur hunters with a homing missile Excalibur, Renkin uses her strategy by having Bodach suck it all up into her coffin and then easily defeat him. With Danchou getting her groove back to defeat the remaining Arthurs, Renkin rejoins the group and may regret a little after she tells her about Fairy Combine. Maybe she should have worded it in a different way…

Episode 2
Rurou and Kakka team up to defeat other Arthurs. Thanks to that, the Excalibur count is drastically reducing. As Danchou’s side is having a hard time fighting against some wine sommelier Arthur, Rurou and Kakka show up to defeat her with their combo. However they are not returning to Danchou and they view her as pathetic. They even sow doubts in Renkin and Tekken’s minds if she is worth following. This leaves Danchou worried and feels the need to do something despite Renkin and Tekken sticking with her. Renkin has a plan to make Danchou change her ways so the rest can return to her. Burn away her cosplay outfits? She can’t. She won’t be who she is anymore! With that, Renkin has had enough and leaves. More anxiety for Danchou. Her worst fears come true when Tekken also soon leaves. It seems both of them went to join Rurou and Kakka. Danchou is so desperate not to be left alone that she is throwing a tantrum! Okay, if she wants in, she must fight and beat Rurou and Kakka. Danchou gets a beating while the duo complain about her failure as their leader. Can’t read the mood, toying with them and worst of all, she tried to do things herself and that shows she didn’t need them. But of course with Danchou’s steely determined eyes and that vow she makes to protect them, turns out this is all an act just to see her determination. So I guess she passed, huh? Though, those harsh comments weren’t a joke. Rurou and Kakka will follow her since she has always been true to her heart. So about their chances to defeat Pharsalia? She’ll knock her out when it comes down to that. That’s Danchou alright. And we should’ve seen this coming as we see her dress up in a very revealing seashell bikini. This is how she is going to knockout Pharsalia? Uh oh. Time to consider leaving again…

Episode 3
Wow. Yamaneko living the peaceful countryside life? Until her Arthur friends show up. Oh dear. Yamaneko doesn’t remember them?! Is she acting?! But wait. When Danchou tries to flirt with her, she pulls out her bazooka! But she doesn’t know why. So she really did forget. Oh Danchou, panicking now? As explained Yamaneko left to train after that devastating loss to Pharsalia. Then when she soaked in this hotspring, an old man told time this hotspring makes one lose their memories. Although the Arthurs plan to bring back her memories, Danchou has a different idea… Yeah, she’s going to take advantage and spew lies that they are engaged to each other! Not that the rest would allow it. Yamaneko doesn’t get it despite all the lessons and training about their mission. Stupid Danchou trying to ruin it all with her flirting. You trying to waste their efforts? And then the town gets attacked by stereotypical villains. The Arthur goes to deal with them. Yamaneko helps the people evacuate but feels frustrated that she herself is already out of breath. And then Danchou protects her from a villain’s strike. Cue for stereotypical drama. Uh huh. Danchou as if she’s dying and Yamaneko getting emotional about that. Yeah, it’s like Danchou’s last wish is her death wish because she wants a kiss. Her hand is already groping her ass! The horrors of people suffering has Yamaneko’s memories return as she doesn’t want to go through that again. And hence she takes out her bazooka and starts firing all the way! Better get out of the way, Danchou! After the villains are rounded up, Nuckelavee deduces Danchou was acting so as to bring back Yamaneko’s memories. I’m sure that wasn’t it but whatever, let’s go with it. Danchou is still gunning for Yamaneko’s ass as she laments goodbye to that kind and innocent version. Then Yamaneko shoots her away. Welcome back, Yamaneko. But really, still want to rejoin this group? But some of the kind Yamaneko still remain because you can sometimes see that sweet smile.

Episode 4
So Yamaneko still a polite girl, huh? However she is still merciless towards pervy Danchou. Thank goodness. Renkin and Bodach continue to research on Fairy Combine and stumble upon this erotic material… Is this how it is done?! Oh dear! So in this hotspring area where there are many weird hotsprings with weird effects, I guess it is to help Yamaneko return to her original character. Pharsalia is also here but Danchou will not allow any fight as there are too many people around. After all, they are not strong to defeat her and even so, that is not their mission. She is okay they risk everything for their mission but not on a needless fight. OMG. Did Danchou say the coolest thing?! Until of course she tries to molest Yamaneko… I’m sure this is inspired from Ranma 1/2 because they try to let her dip into various hotsprings that turn her into a baby, a delinquent, a man and finally a flirty nympho! The commotion also has the rest falling in so we got an equally flirty nympho Renkin, a serious Danchou and the rest of the guys turned into girls! While this fiasco is ongoing, Touzoku faces off with Chapman, the hotspring owner who seems to be affecting the entire place with his Excalibur. It gets complicated when our messed up Arthur hunters enter the scene. Then this weird chase scene before finally Renkin decides to do Fairy Combine with Bodach. So it’s just mouth to mouth eating Pocky sticks? Everybody is looking with much anticipation… Eventually Bodach can’t do it. What a downer. Back to the action, by stopping the hotspring source, Chapman loses his ability and is defeated. In the aftermath, everyone returns to normal. The rest are suspicious of Touzoku since she is friends with Pharsalia. She assures she won’t do anything if they don’t attack first. As they are interested to see what they’re doing, Touzoku and her groupie would be watching them closely. Back home, some are reluctant about doing Fairy Combine. Some are daring though it is just one sided. Like Brigitte and of course Danchou. Oh Nuckelavee, you regretting Danchou has reverted to normal? But Yamaneko and Coupy just, uhm, eating Pocky sticks just fine. Nothing much happens. Want to have another go?

Episode 5
Kakka is out sick so Yamaneko plays the nurse? The rest head out to this town that is deserted. The fisherman explains some chef started challenging all the restaurants with his superior food. Because of that, all the shops closed down and those who supply food have a hard time selling it to him. Now he only serves the rich and wealthy. So our Arthur hunters go into his building to challenge him. He doesn’t want to fight but rather have a cooking showdown. Normally they won’t entertain him but stupid Danchou agrees. With their fairies as judge-cum-commentators, the chef finishes his dish and lets Danchou taste. Instantly she goes to heaven. Yeah, she lost. Next, Tekken tastes it to see why it’s so special. Instant heaven trip! Yeah, he lost too. When Renkin tastes it, she finds it normal. The chef is so insulted that he wants another showdown of clam chowder and acqua pazza at dawn tomorrow. As Renkin prepares her dish with the fisherman’s help, Rurou wonders why she is unaffected. Bodach explains Renkin was raised in an orphanage so she doesn’t care about fancy food. More importantly, the people who made food for her made it with love. Rurou goes to help Renkin. However her clam chowder poisons Bethor! Dawn is here. Not enough time. Rurou tells her to make the food she loves the most. And so Renkin arrives at the showdown with just a bun. The chef thinks he has already won and tastes it. Instantly a nostalgic trip down memory lane! The nostalgic taste has him remember he was once from the orphanage too but craved freedom and ran away. Many years later, he paid the price of being lonely. A bread that the rat didn’t even want to eat, he tries to steal it but it drops into the gutter. Then some gutter goddess gave him choose some breads and he chose the ordinary one. That taste reminded him of the same bread he had in his orphanage. And so when he wielded the Excalibur, he vowed to help hungry people around the world. Crap story, but whatever. He calls Renkin his saviour and returns to his roots. But no happy ending yet as Yamaneko scolds them to come back and help her with the ‘sick patients’.

Episode 6
Yamaneko receives a letter from Utahime that she’ll come to visit her. But she didn’t think she would come this soon! Turns out to be an imposter as she knocks her out and takes on Yamaneko’s appearance. Her plan is to infiltrate the base and take all of them out. However due to the alert, the Arthur hunters realize there is an intruder but cannot pinpoint where. As they go look, the imposter thinks of taking down Renkin first. WTF she thinks Renkin is Little Red Riding Hood and disguises as a wolf?! Arthur alert!!! She manages to escape and next she tricks Tekken and trips him down the chasm. Only, this guy climbs back up and loves this new training spot! Next, she tries to seduce Kakka but he alerts everyone she has Danchou Fever! WTF?! Anybody who cosplays sexily is deemed to have one and must be put to bed! You bet Danchou wants to look after her. The imposter doesn’t know and wants her to stay by her side. Big mistake. Because this turns Danchou on and suddenly the room becomes a love hotel and… Damn, the imposter so violated. I don’t know how she survived it but she remembers her original mission to usurp Utahime. When the real Utahime arrives, the imposter goes to greet her. Luckily the real Yamaneko returns. Oh no. Which is the real Yamaneko?! Easy. The imposter doesn’t have Coupy by her side. Time for some answers. But the imposter does the oldest trick in the book, “Look over there!”. The moment they do so and look back, oh no, which is the real Utahime?! Time to see if Yamaneko truly knows her stuffs. After a few deliberation, she blasts the imposter away. How she knows? She doesn’t have the same scent as in the letter. The imposter she was a queen of a certain kingdom. One day the magic mirror told her the fairest in the land is Utahime. Ever since she has been waiting for her chance to take her down and did lots of research. She also heard Utahime was going to see Yamaneko and that’s when she hatched another plan to take down the Arthur hunters. After criticizing her flawed plans, they are going to dispose of her but Danchou has a better idea. Meanwhile Utahime and Yamaneko talk. The former admits her lie that her schedule isn’t as hectic as she painted and is very free. Most of her jobs are just opening for other idols. She wanted to ask if she became a famous idol in the future but scrapped that thought. It is best she discovers that herself. Meanwhile Danchou the dominatrix queen wants the imposter to turn into Yamaneko and… Oh f*ck! This fate is worse than death!!!

Episode 7
You think you’ve seen everything? Think again! This time our Arthur hunters stumble into footballers! Captain Tsubasa Arthurs???!!! And of course we have to play a football match. Danchou as the coach agreed to this idea because they don’t know which item is Excalibur. The enemies will only give it to them if they beat them. Otherwise, forever be their slaves! You think this looks easy, right? Well, if you put Renkin as the goalkeeper… Poor little girl… She gets blown away by the impact of each goal shot! It’s a scoring spree! By halftime, Arthur hunters are down 0-23! And Danchou has the balls to complain?! Heck, they are even moving as they were told! However Renkin has an idea for the next half. This time when the opponents shoot, she uses her complex calculation of tai chi moves to stop the ball and send it to her comrade to score. This method allows Arthur hunters to take the lead 29-23. However the opponents are now getting serious and that is when the striker’s super special kick, Renkin can’t stop. Turns out his cleats is Excalibur. The score is now tied at 29-29. With Renkin at her limit, Danchou steps in to take over. I thought she was fired? She has Tekken be the goalkeeper because his Excalibur gloves are good in keeping those shots away. And this ridiculous winning goal… Danchou turns into some spinning fireball and shoots the ball that blows away the opponent’s clothes, the goalpost, the stadium and the mountain!!! WTF????!!!! Arthur hunter team wins 30-29! Showing great sportsmanship, the opponents hand over their Excalibur with no fuss. In the aftermath as our Arthur hunters recover from sore muscles, Tekken stumbles into another group of Arthurs… Ping pong Arthurs, anybody?! Let the madness stop already!!!

Episode 8
Danchou talks about unity until she hears the city of Florian in addition to having an Excalibur detected, there are lots of cute girls! Yup, she’s already halfway there! Until Kakka puts a stop to her and lectures her about stuffs. Since they’re almost there, Danchou and Kakka will handle this. However the place is decimated and where are the cute girls?! Anthony brings them to Lord Adam Christopher. He explains there is a civil war going on. That’s why he has the women and children evacuated. Apparently his general, Bartos now don’t see eye to eye with him and hence this war. Danchou and Kakka impersonate as maids to serve Bartos but he only wants Kakka! Danchou may leave. Don’t tell me this guy is shotacon… Anyway, Bartos abuses Kakka and believes women have no equal rights to men, the reason why this war started. It’s heart breaking to see Kakka’s bruised like that! Oh sh*t! When Bartos’ men attack, Christopher has the Arthur hunters escape. In the end, he loses his life. This might sound things will be easier since they will just need to defeat Bartos and destroy his Excalibur. But a message from Renkin saying that there is no Excalibur here. The counter was experiencing some difficulties and is now fixed. The real Excaliburs are somewhere else and is being handled by the rest. Real history of Florian is happening. Christopher dies, Anthony dies and Bartos takes over ruling the city. Kakka is infuriated because he will not sit by and let this cruelty happen. Only to be slapped by Danchou and reminded their true mission is to correct history and not distort them further. If he insists, he can leave the team. And so Kakka disobeys and goes to help Anthony’s side launch an attack. Kakka faces off with Bartos and tells him to surrender. But Bartos dares him to kill him. Since Kakka couldn’t he gets mocked that he is really a pussy, a woman in disguise. The Arthur hunters leave dejectedly. However Pharsalia is not pleased with this outcome. Whatever history she thinks is right will be that history. So she kills Bartos and decimates his entire castle! This allows Anthony and his men to declare victory.

Episode 9
Kakka is still affected from the last time that he almost got owned in battle. Meanwhile a group of previously defeated Arthurs, band together as Revengers to seek revenge on Arthur hunters. This time they have a mercenary on their side, Youhei who is part of Touzoku’s group. With another Arthur anomaly detected, Kakka rushes there to prove himself. Tekken follows him and they find a large Excalibur graveyard. Before them is Revengers. However they are not those Arthurs they defeated but rather their twin! Note the subtle difference! You see, after their twins got defeated, they turned over a new leaf and contributed greatly to society. Hence they are jealous that in comparison, their lives now suck! WTF?! As they fight, Kakka gets careless. Not only his Excalibur is stolen but Brigitte gets injured protecting him. Tekken forces them to retreat for now. With Kakka wallowing in depression, Tekken goes off to fight Revengers himself. Of course with Brigitte waking and Kakka making amends, time to get down to business. Tekken goes straight to face Leicester. However he has a device that would allow him to use and combine multiple Excaliburs. At this point, Youhei joins Tekken to take him down but they’re no match. Kakka returns to fight but is still no match. Can Brigitte protect Kakka in her weakened state? And this part where they stare at each other, suddenly something activates. So is this what Fairy Combine is all about? Yup, the duo transformed into a more powerful being. Uhm, don’t their character design look evil? Anyway, they are powerful enough to take down Leicester. In the aftermath, Youhei explains he was just using them as bait and waiting for a chance. When Touzoku stole blueprints of that device, they didn’t know where it was being hidden. Hence he had to wait for the chance when the device is being used to take action. Tekken wants a rematch with him but Youhei is not in the mood. Maybe some other time.

Episode 10
While everyone celebrates Kakka and Brigitte’s Fairy Combine, Renkin gets desperate and technical. So she wants to know the temperature and the atmosphere too? The rest try to calm her down but she views it as no one taking her seriously. As she decides to leave to do more research, a butler greets her because he is here to pick her up for his master, Andy. Apparently when Andy was ambushed by bandits, Renkin came to her rescue. Oh dear. Is he a lolicon? Because he now wants her to accept his proposal! Her Arthur comrades throw caution and that she should do some research on this guy first before committing. Unfortunately she finds their nagging a bit too much and decides to go to Andy. Yeah, this guy now wants to marry her! Lolicon alert! But then the bandits show up for revenge. Renkin will go fight them. However Touzoku cuts in and tells the truth that Andy has been stealing a lot from these people and that they are the real victims. Renkin is shocked but she still wants to confirm and talks to Andy about this. He then shows off his wives and claims they are here because they want to. Of course the real culprit is the butler whose ring is an Excalibur who can control others. WTF his weird satisfaction comes from watching Andy cleaning the ears of his wives?! Renkin tries to attack the butler but he uses the wives as a wall. Naturally Renkin pulls back and gets hypnotized. She is ordered to attack Bodach. Luckily Danchou and Tekken are here to help. Renkin and Bodach bump heads and this somewhat restores Renkin’s sanity. The rest head in to fight the butler as Renkin realizes her foolishness just so that she can be useful. When the others get hypnotized, Renkin faces Bodach once more. Touzoku easily snaps Danchou and Tekken out. Renkin is about to be sucked into Bodach’s coffin and realizes Bodach is not completely hypnotized because she is crying. Though she breaks her spell, both get sucked into the coffin. In this weird dimension, some weird bonding and then voila! Fairy Combine! Renkin now kicks ass. Although the butler buffs up like the Hulk, still no match for levelled up Renkin. With his Excalibur broken, now it’s his turn to pay from the angry men and wives. Our Arthurs now celebrate Renkin and Bodach’s Fairy Combine.

Episode 11
Because an Excalibur is detected in the gambling city of Loss Vegas (yes, you lose!), I guess kids and ‘uncontrolled adults’ are not allowed so it’s a job for Rurou and Yamaneko. Bethor’s plan has them dressed up as a rich newlywed couple so they could smoke out the Arthur who might be using the Excalibur to cheat and win big. But with stunning Rurou and Yamaneko seemingly close together (because they had to look the part), Bethor feels jealous. That is confirmed when the crowd pushes Rurou and he accidentally kisses Yamaneko’s forehead! Oh dear, is that Danchou here too? She’s on a losing streak. Then in the VIP room where the big money is, Bethor is not allowed because of her dress. So she scores in all the games to win big to buy herself a dress to go up against Rurou in this poker game. What gives? Rurou doesn’t understand why but eventually folds when Bethor bets all and wins. The real Arthur is the casino’s owner and he knows the Arthur hunters and will take action. Rurou confronts Bethor about that stint but she’s not going to say it straight to his face, right? When a woman says she’s not upset, you bet she’s upset. When penniless Danchou seeks money from them, it is a trap as they got captured. The owner wants them to return all his money and threaten to kill Danchou who is now reduced to a scumbag, trying to sell her cosplay outfits for money! If not, he’ll kill Bethor too. The duo manage to break free as they run amok to find and rescue their fairies. Yamaneko explains about Bethor’s jealousy and understands why she did so. The owner turns his casino into some flying fortress. When the fairies are rescued, Rurou apologizes to Bethor for not knowing her feelings. Maybe he did but didn’t want to acknowledge them. Then Rurou protects her from a bullet. Yamaneko gets mad and pumps her bazooka into the fortress. This allows her to Fairy Combine with Coupy to do more devastating damage. Sad Bethor’s tear drops on Rurou and you bet another Fairy Combine is happening. Just in time because the owner is escaping in his pod and is taken down with his fortress. Happy ending for our Arthur hunters. Except for Danchou. Seeing the bag of money, she tries to grab it but falls into the abyss. Some things never change…

Episode 12
Danchou fears everyone will mock her for not being able to Fairy Combine. I think it’s because she’s showing such a tantrum that they naturally have to… I mean, it’s a fact, right?! So I guess the counter showing Excalibur anomalies at different places would be the right time for those who can’t Fairy Combine to uhm, try and Fairy Combine? Good luck. After Danchou and Tekken defeat a few Arthurs, Pharsalia drops by to visit. Don’t worry, she’s not going to attack them but warns them that having too much power won’t make anybody happy. With Danchou having deep thoughts about it, Tekken being Tekken doesn’t care with all that. Power is just power. All that matters is what you do with them. They receive word that the next town over is being attacked by invaders. You mean those giant black balls? Danchou flops and gets injured. Titania sure pick a fine time to feel worried about not being as talented as she claims, huh? And of course, Tekken being Tekken, he always believed in her and never felt she held him back. Just stay the way you are. Titania gets back in the groove and joins him destroying the invaders. Yup, time for them to Fairy Combine! Oh Danchou, looks like all the jokes are going to be on you and only you… Pharsalia watches this and realizes that this power is too dangerous for the world. Hence her twisted reasoning is that the reason she exists in this era is to stop those Arthur hunters. Yup, she is going to destroy them all now, only to be stopped by Youhei. He thinks she should give them some time to think and decide. If they return to the future, then the current era won’t be in danger, right? While the Arthur hunters aren’t happy with this suggestion, it is better than fighting her and dying right where they stand. That’s right. They have no chance to defeat her at all. Pharsalia gives them 7 days to think it over. She will do nothing if they return to the future. Otherwise, total annihilation.

Episode 13
The Arthur hunters are discussing whether to run or fight. However Danchou disbands the team because she wants to give them the freedom to choose. At this point they shouldn’t be surprised with her decision but yeah, they fear she might go it alone again. So we see the Arthurs and their fairies talk things out, some talking to their Arthur counterparts in Touzoku’s group. And Danchou getting desperate to Fairy Combine with Nuckelavee. Trying to put on her this skimpy bikini and make out?! Fortunately it didn’t happen. Unfortunately, Fairy Combine didn’t happen either. So on the final day, all the Arthur hunters return. I guess they’ve decided. Let’s fight this. Facing off with Pharsalia, the rest has Danchou stay out. Without Fairy Combine, she might just get in the way. True. Despite giving all they’ve got, it’s hardly a scratch on Pharsalia. Now it’s her turn. You’ve never seen true fear until now! I think this is just a fraction of what she can do with her power. Danchou butts in but even Pharsalia doesn’t think she is a threat. Since she is stubborn, I guess upgrade status to threatening. Touzoku interrupts because the invaders are having a full scale attack. This doesn’t concern Pharsalia. She will eliminate the Arthur hunters first. She will rewrite their legend. Danchou agrees because being alive is her legend and she will not let others decide it. At this point she looks so cool that Nuckelavee dons that skimpy bikini so as to Fairy Combine with her. Yeah, finally it worked. That’s not all the Fairy Combine goes. Danchou absorbs her comrades into a giant sword that deals a lot of damage to Pharsalia! But they don’t finish her off and go deal with the invaders. Are you sure? Even if Pharsalia fights them in the future, they will fight back again. Simple. If she deems Fairy Combine as the greatest threat because of its power, they’ll show her how it is also the greatest power to protect. Danchou, so cool! 3 days later… Pharsalia asking for a rematch! Give them a break, they just finished fending off the invaders. But then the counter goes crazy. Looks like all over Britain there are now 10 million Excaliburs! WTF???!!! Every item that everyone has is now an Excalibur?! They suspect Pharsalia did this but they have to deal with this first. Otherwise they can’t return to the future. Get going now!

Special
Yamaneko and Renkin have this feeling somebody is watching them. Of course everyone instantly suspects Danchou. Heck, she admits she wouldn’t stop at peeping and would rather get physical right now! Over the next few scenes, the girls continue to get molested and this time the guys got their crotch squeezed! Instantly, Danchou is suspected again. Interrogation time. Though she is let off, the rest continue to ignore her. With Danchou so broken, Nuckelavee pleads to the rest she is innocent. Yeah, it’s so pitiful that they declare her innocent. Until Yamaneko’s panties get stolen. Back to the interrogation room! Because they find panties all over her room and secret sexy stash of Yamaneko pictures, this time the court finds her guilty and thus she is stripped of her leadership and exiled. With the pervert no longer around, it is such peace and quiet. Until Renkin’s panties are stolen. OMG. Is the culprit one of them? What’s this? Renkin’s panties in Rurou’s pocket?! Guilty! Exiled! Everyone is shocked at Rurou being a lolicon. Of course Rurou knows he has been set up and needs to clear his name. He finds Danchou who is living like a vagabond and tells what happened. Outside their base, they detect an additional figure running around the house. Could it be a ghost because that figure is running up close to Nuckelavee but yet she sees nothing. Suddenly all the other Arthur hunters and their fairies are being tied up. The culprit reveals herself to be an invisible Arthur. She has infiltrated and did all those despicable acts so as to break their team apart. Now she is going to enjoy themselves as she molests them to hear their squeal. Yeah, taking pictures to boot. Not sure if this is part of the plan as Danchou and Rurou crash in to rescue. Uhm, are you sure you can fight the unseen enemy? Fighting fire with fire, Danchou strips and the invisible Arthur gets a nosebleed. Oh look, she just marked herself. She tries to escape but Danchou and Nuckelavee Fairy Combine to take her down. The Arthur sextets return to their daily lives with Yamaneko and Renkin apologizing to the wrongly accused. But Danchou is enjoying the confiscated treasures of the invisible Arthur and then she got busted by the rest. Don’t need any trial. Guilty! Death sentence!

Ah Turds, Are There Utterly Other Arthurs?
Oh well, for the sake of the future of Britain, better get used to searching and destroying all the Excaliburs. Having fun, are we? No wonder the sextet are a kooky bunch. Prolonged Excalibur hunter has turned them into a bunch of clowns and jokers, even more so led by a self-admitting pervert. If you don’t hurry up, Pharsalia might impose additional penalties on you. Yup, howzabout one billion Excaliburs more to exterminate! Just when the Arthur hunters have whittled down to just a single digit of Excaliburs left, our fun loving sadistic Pharsalia ramps up the challenge and adds more Excaliburs to be hunted. Yeah, I’d understand why they’d go crazy. Can you blame Danchou of wanting to let loose some steam and be a pervert? Uhm, maybe not. She’s already broken to begin with. Those secret sexy stash of Yamaneko better help… She’ll need all the help she can get. Oh God save Britain… God save us all!

Having a million Excaliburs, oh sorry, ten million Excaliburs, I suppose it is one of the way to make many of the episodes as standalone fillers and episodic. I mean, nobody is seriously going to keep count on how many Excaliburs our Arthur hunters have destroyed, right? So in each episode, it gets somewhat predictable and boring. Counter detects some anomaly somewhere in Britain. Not all our Arthurs go there and mostly it will be 1 or 2 because this serves as a chance to give them some limelight and flesh out their character development. A lot of weird and dumb things happen in between. The obligatory Arthur fight and action scenes. Excalibur destroyed. Insert joke or punch line to finish the episode. Yeah, that’s the flow of how most episodes go.

But I have to be fair too because not all of the episodes are pretty generic and formulaic. Some of them are really funny like that football spoof one. Boy, I can never stop laughing when petite Renkin gets blown away from the impact! Yeah, I can’t stop chuckling even thinking back about this. Some are touching like that episode on Rose. It was really a sad one and I wished it could have ended in a better way. Some left my head scratching like that Florian episode. I thought it would affect and change the course of history or something but from what I can see, it feels the same like other episodes. After it ends, it is mostly forgotten like though it has no effect at all. So it doesn’t really matter, huh? The same case for those Renkin’s magical girl apprentices. Whatever happened to them after that episode? Forgot about them too? But it doesn’t beat weird ones like that time Yamaneko lost her memories and became a nice girl. Yeah, that was a weird episode.

Besides, the plot of having just 6 Arthurs from the future to hunt down and destroy all the rogue Excaliburs feel like a flimsy plot so as to give us that lazily written standalone and filler-like episodes. Remember, we don’t keep count on how many Excaliburs they have destroyed. So in the event if there is a huge group of rogue Arthurs and their rogue Excaliburs descending on our Arthur hunters, we can just go all out with one big cheap action scene of knocking out those unimportant enemies. Then they can knock off some ‘big numbers’ like a thousand Excaliburs or ten thousand Excaliburs that they have destroyed. Wohoo! Achievement! There, shaved off a few Excaliburs there. Hey, might be still far away from reducing it to zero but we are now closer to our goal when we first started, right? And then somebody got the bright idea of increasing it to 10 million more… Oh well, if Pharsalia can’t destroy them, might as well be amused and see them run around taking down as many Excaliburs they can. Better work their ass off for the sake of her entertainment. Hey, better than being destroyed, right?

Also, something that doesn’t make sense is that the rogue Excaliburs are only confined to Britain. So I am assuming other parts of the world is relatively safe from this Excalibur threat? It also makes no sense that the Excalibur threat pops up one by one as detected by the counter. I know, plot convenience. I mean, Britain isn’t really that big of an isle, right? It’s not like the size of Russia, right? And sure, Britain has a population of around 66 million people so having a million Excaliburs and then 10 million of them seems justified. Can’t the future send more Arthur hunters to deal with this? You’re telling me that in the future there are no qualified Arthur hunters than just the 6 of them? Boy, no wonder we don’t want to do some divisions and realize how many Excaliburs an Arthur hunter has to deal with individually. That will be 1,666,666.667 Excaliburs per Arthur to be precise, thank you please. Yeah, and everyone who wields a rogue Arthurs must be so dumb to think they’ve got the power to do whatever they want. No wonder they don’t last. Yeah, thank plot convenience again…

With so many distortions in the past, you wonder if the future of Britain will be the same. People’s lives are changed the moment they come into contact with the Excaliburs. So as long as they destroy it, it’s like the outcome in the future will be the same? I don’t get that logic. I don’t want to open Pandora’s Box by thinking about some time paradox thingy but I am sure that what the Arthur sextet are doing is correct and the past didn’t change at all because otherwise they would cease to exist. So I believe whatever tragedy happened still happened. Sad… And I hope they won’t give this lazy and lame excuse of a way out that Pharsalia rewrote the legends… Please don’t…

As for the characters, I can’t say that I am impressed with the main sextet. Sure, we had 2 dozen of episodes to flesh them out but sometimes I feel that they are poorly written and rushed. For instance, today’s episode we will have this Arthur hunter in focus. Some weird setting for the episode to serve as the plot too. After a few episodes, you can guess their primarily personality. Like Tekken who is has more muscles in his brain and prefers to jump in first. Yup, punch first, ask questions later. Then there is the prideful His Excellency Kakka who uses magic, the handsome wanderer Rurou, the stoic mountain cat AKA Yamaneko and the intellectual Red Riding Hood AKA Renkin who seems to be concerned about her small stature especially if being treated as a kid. It is too bad that we don’t know much about these Arthurs whose past ironically lies in the future. What drove them to become Arthurs and take on this mission? Unfortunately this series doesn’t delve much into that.

Of course the biggest ‘loser’ is no other than Danchou who can be described in just a word: Pervert. Yup, it’s basically funny because she’s female. Had she been a guy, this would be creepy as f*ck. So Danchou is basically the one who makes this series ‘funny’ because of her perverted antics and fetish. I know, we’re supposed to cringe rather than laugh. Hence she becomes the punch line when this backfires on her because she deserves it anyway. Her comrades don’t think much of her in high regards and it’s not surprising. They put up with her because she is their leader (mostly in name) and that she is amusing. I know they didn’t say that last bit but I’m guessing that if she was a strict and serious leader, the group would have been super boring. This series wouldn’t have been nowhere near a comedy and this would really suck. So with Danchou being an idiot because in some major animes where the team leader is always that my pace idiot, yeah, this group doesn’t feel as boring as it should. So be thankful for Danchou! Never change, Danchou. Never change. Of course there are times where she says the coolest and the most leader-like things but that is far and few in between her stupid and perverted exploits. I believe one of her life goals is to get lesbian with Yamaneko… That wild cat better maintain her distance and ignore her if she knows what’s good for her even though in the end, Yamaneko’s like more tolerant of her. Don’t ever let your guard down once around this pervert.

You know what they say about a leopard never changes its spots. This means despite all of Danchou’s promise to change, she’ll never keep her word and will be back to her usual perversion in no time. It’s a wonder that the group can still be cohesive and the irony of always suspecting her when perverted stuffs happened, they still let her hang around them. Yeah, I know the childish tantrums are one thing. You sure Danchou isn’t some rogue Arthur too? I can imagine if this is the trust level of the Arthur hunters, man, infiltrating and trying to break up and bring them down would be easy. We have seen that happened a few times. And then they get back together again. And then on the verge of breaking up again. Man, their trust is so fragile and fickle… Even when Rurou was accused as a lolicon, sure there were circumstantial evidence but you guys have been so long with each other that you should know better than to suddenly throw your trust out the window. Danchou is one case but Rurou? I suppose a group without a leader can’t get anywhere. That’s why the role of a leader is so important. You hear that, Danchou?! Ah forget it. I’m wasting my time talking to a pervert who just wants to get inside of Yamaneko.

I don’t even know what the fairy companions they have are really for except for the fact that it is to serve that monumental plot of Fairy Combine. Because otherwise I see them mostly as useless and don’t really contribute much. They’re just there by their Arthurs’ side, maybe give a little advice or something but nothing really that makes you feel like they should be a pair. The closest came in the form Bethor when she got jealous that Rurou looked close to Yamaneko. But still, the Fairy Combine episodes look somewhat rushed too seeing that they needed some reason and catalyst to power up our Arthur hunters. After all the times that they have gone through, you mean this flimsy setting and scene that looked just like any other moments that they have gone through before, becomes the means for them to do Fairy Combine? Whatever. I’m done.

Since this series is based on a game by Square Enix of the Million Arthur franchise, I subsequently discovered that there are many different other Arthurs depending on which game you play. Hence other Arthur characters like Utahime, Touzoku and Youhei come from the other titles of the game. Hence they are like making cameos here and it is unsure what their mission is. But I doubt it is helping our Arthur hunters in destroying the Excaliburs. Because otherwise they would have joined forces and it would ease some of the burden our Arthur hunters are facing. But for now, they have a totally different mission and I’m assuming there is something more than meets the eye. Different Arthur units with different missions, that would be interesting. Well, if they do make other spinoffs of this series then maybe it would be worth to check out.

Pharsalia seems like the antagonist of the series but it is hard to tell whether she is friend or foe. As long as you are amusing and not a threat to the world, I guess she will put on her cutie smile and looks. She claims she is some legendary fairy who rewrites legends. But I guess that doesn’t mean that she is God because for the simplest reason she failed to tackle our Arthur hunters, even more so after all of them make their Fairy Combine and then the ultimate Fairy Combine v2, it is safe to say that she isn’t legendary after all. Oh sh*t, I hope she won’t kill me off because I just ruined her legend.

I thought this was going to be an action genre series since we’re going to have Arthurs destroying Excaliburs. Well, the action sequences are just passable. It feels like it is something obligatory so that we could see something get smashed or the likes. I mean, that is the purpose of our Arthur hunters too, right? Nobody is going to gladly surrender their Excalibur peacefully. So watching the Arthur hunters in action sometimes feel like watching a low quality action series. They just do what they have to do with their limited power and thanks to the plot convenience, we all know it is going to end well. After all, Tekken only uses punches, Kakka his magic, Rurou shoots his twin pistols, Yamaneko her bazooka and Renkin her giant hammer. What else more of a variety can you expect from that? Don’t even get me started on Danchou using her sword. I feel that is only there for accessory… And if they are overwhelmed by countless enemies, it makes it all easier for the action scene to be sloppy. After all, that is the disadvantage when you have such huge numbers. You have to be careful not to hit your own comrades unless you’re the kind who doesn’t give a f*ck about others. And thus the big numbers make it easy for our Arthur hunters to rain their offensive power on them as they are such easy targets. And you think Fairy Combine has them wielding better firepower? Nah. Just looks like they have much flashier effects!

One of my favourite segments is at the end of each episode. No, not the part where they showcase one of the staff’s cute pets at home, but rather the very silly comical skits. If you have watched the very nonsensical Ai Mai Mi, you know what I’m talking about. Yup, the characters and animation are even drawn to the crazy chibi style of Ai Mai Mi. In this segment, everything goes. That is the best way to summarize all the stupid nonsense that happens here. Throw logic out of the window because for the last 2 minutes of every episode, you will be fed with so much nonsense that your brain won’t be fast enough to process whether it is funny or cringe worthy. Even if I don’t get it, I still laugh my ass off! And the best part of it all? That manjuu club song at the end!!! So epic to sing along! That nonsensical Dainagon Is Dead rock piece isn’t so bad too but nothing beats the manjuu song. We are omanjuu club!!! Oh yeah! Now it makes me wish we have another season of Ai Mai Mi…

Art and animation are pretty standard but I do notice that there are some scenes that are low and poor in quality. Sometimes it comes off as a bit cartoonish. Of course some of the character designs are weirdest especially the fairies. They looked more like oversized cosplay maniacs. Especially Bethor. She’s literally wearing a swimsuit. School mizugi for heaven’s sakes! Sure, she wears a jacket over it but a swimsuit is basically her official uniform. I don’t think this is Rurou’s fetish but I could be wrong… The other fairies are like Nuckelavee who is some sailor wannabe as she has 2 lifebuoys by her side. Bodach looks some gothic fashion, Coupy a fallen angel, Brigitte some race queen wannabe and Titania probably looking closest to what a fairy but comes off as human butterfly. And the designs of Fairy Combine at first I thought they look badass but the more I look at it, the more they seem weird. Just slap some wings and accessories and voila! Your Fairy Combine form! This anime is done by J.C. Staff and I can say this is not one of their best quality anime considering they did One Punch Man, Shokugeki No Souma, DanMachi, Bakuman, the Index and Railgun series to name a few.

For the voice acting, I recognized a few seiyuus lending their talents here. Notably, Ayana Taketatsu as Yamaneko, Yuuichi Nakamura as Rurou, Tetsuya Kakihara as Tekken (why does he remind me of Fairy Tail’s Natsu but without the fire firepower?), Natsuki Hanae as Kakka, Nao Touyama as Coupy and Ayane Sakura as Touzoku. The other casts are Sora Amamiya as Danchou (Aqua in KonoSuba – now you know why the idiocy is so familiar), Inori Minase as Renkin (Hestia in DanMachi), Himika Akaneya as Nuckelavee (Yatsumura in Mahou Shoujo Site), Rie Takahashi as Titania (Megumin in KonoSuba), Rina Hidaka as Bethor (Last Order in To Aru Majutsu No Index), Suzuko Mimori as Bodach (Umi in Love Live), Yuu Serizawa as Brigitte (Iroha in 3D Kanojo Real Girl), Ai Kayano as Pharsalia (Darkness in KonoSuba), Atsushi Abe as Youhei (Kokonotsu in Dagashi Kashi), Maaya Uchida as Utahime (Kaguya Date A Live).

The first season’s opening theme is Highlight by Ayaka Ohashi. Typical lively anime pop that suits the pacing and genre of this series. Quite okay if you hear it once in a while. The first season’s ending theme is Ki-te Mi-te Hit Parade sung by the fairy sextet. Feels like a weird song. Not sure if this is supposed to be a dance piece and it sounds like your typical idol pop music. Making it even weirder is the animation of the fairies rolling over the LP record. Is this record broken? Not going to be a hit anyway… The second opening theme sounds slightly better. Open The Worlds by Oresama has a very catchy finger drilling piano play although the overall song is just okay. Time to ramp up the sinfulness of sin city because the second season’s ending theme, Pearly x Party also by the fairy sextet has this disco feel and its animation revolves mainly around the casino and gambling. I guess I’m out of luck. The series also has other insert songs and special ending themes and the one I prefer the most is Utahime’s Ito Utsukushiki Hikari No Naka De, the special ending for the first season’s episode 9.

Overall, this is actually a mediocre anime series if you look at it in all aspects. The story is a big fail with a flimsy setting to begin with. The characters are also a big fail because at the end of the day you don’t feel like putting your support behind them. All thanks to pervy Danchou ruining it all despite her comrades are decent but even so they are still terrible. Action pieces are just standard and nothing to shout about. They’re supposed to entertain but it felt more obligatory than anything. And the biggest fail is that this is supposed to be comedy and the funny moments usually comes off as cringe and mostly are derived from Danchou’s perversion. You’ve got to be a kindergarten kid to find her shamelessness as funny. But thanks for the fanservice anyway. Not. The only comedy that saved the day was Ai Mai Mi’s spoof. But that couldn’t do much to save this series that was doomed from the start. Not because of the threats of rogue Excaliburs. Sometimes you think it is the Arthur hunters’ Excaliburs that could be the cursed ones and this crappy legend wouldn’t have arisen had this series not being made. Did I tell you there was live action TV show of this back in 2014 although it used an entirely different cast of Arthurs?! Yikes! I saw the surreal promo poster and was instantly put off. Sighs. Forget this series being just the level of a myth, fiction or fable. This is just crap. I guess some legends were never meant to be.

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