Rescue Me

October 11, 2013

I guess I never learn. After my stint with Kagaku Na Yatsura and Nozoki Ana, I vowed to stay clear of animes with borderline ecchi and hentai. So when Rescue Me came out, I was really going to give this the pass. Really. Seeing a couple of girls in a very compromising situation in the poster already gave me an idea what kind of anime this is going to be. I also have a feeling what kind of fans will be watching this show. Therefore no harm reading the synopsis since I wasn’t going to watch this anyway. And then I saw this line, “… lives in his home as a zealously intrusive maid, leading to uncomfortably erotic situations”. Oh dear. A maid? For real? A MAID?! Wow! This I must see! Shame on me. Somehow the producers know how to get to me by using my favourite… Ahem. And so this is how I ended up watching this anime. Be warned, there are lots of sexual innuendoes and ecchi situations. Although all are confined in the heads of those sick perverted characters and nothing real gets done in. Rescue me from this, you say? Well, I’m already beyond any help.

Suddenly Mote-Mote…
We are being told by Masayuki Mizutani that his parents have left for work overseas for 2 years so starting today he will be living all alone. Yeah. Why does this always happen when the adults are away? Which leads to a convenient setting… To his surprise, his classmate, Sayaka Shimizu is greeting him in a naked apron and claims to be his maid. What the hell is this? He’s definitely not happy. I mean, an honours student suddenly getting this sexy with him? Shimizu gets the wrong idea and ups the getup of her naked apron by taking off her panties. I know what she says about her getup that enables brain-filled sexual desire boys to go wild over her and since Masayuki didn’t, I’m beginning to think he is gay… So Shimizu even brings Masayuki his bento to class and his friend Matsushita starts to go crazy-cum-angry. Since when is Masayuki close to this girl? He heard everything about their ‘darling’ talk and even goes far to think that they have crossed the line into adulthood. Cue to imagine sexual fantasies here. Shimizu’s fantasy is even worse… How horny can she get? Even if Shimizu herself said Masayuki (unfortunately) did nothing to her, he is not convinced and is more suspicious. Or maybe he is just stubborn and jealous. Masayuki and Shimizu’s families are good friends so before the former’s parents left, they entrusted her to take care of him. Oh sure. Very trusting people, no? Can you believe it, she is also fine of taking care of his lower anatomy!!!

Later Shimizu spies on Masayuki because he is with a junior, Anna Ozono and they are part of the beautification committee. They are about to begin beautifying the place but Shimizu confronts Masayuki about humiliating role playing in public. She would gladly play that part if he so desires (cue for her horny sick delusions). Ozono respects Shimizu for wanting to serve Masayuki no matter what but Shimizu gets straight to the point that with her kind of body, she cannot satisfy Masayuki. Ozono laments that her small breasts is only enough to wash his back unlike Shimizu’s humungous boobs that could, erm, well you can imagine that. But Shimizu is impressed with this because she know has a new method to serve Masayuki better. Once again, the ever jealous Matsushita pops up to make his comment about Masayuki being a truly fearsome monster for hitting on 2 girls in a day.

Back home, Masayuki is surprised that Yuka Takamura is here to visit him. From the way she seduces him, it seems this little sister likes her onii-chan and would gladly let him touch her loli boobs and allow him to do whatever he wants. Thankfully that won’t happen because Shimizu stops them and confronts this new rival. Turns out Yuka is Masayuki’s aunt!!! WTF???!!! I can’t believe this! She is Masayuki’s mother’s sister and because Masayuki is older than her, that’s why she calls him onii-chan. Hey wait. Just how old is Masayuki’s mom?! Unless there is a very obvious age gap between them since Yuka is still in school! Mind boggling… Yuka and Shimizu enter a showdown over him. Big boobs or loli body. They force Masayuki to choose whom he likes and put his hand over their breast. See, he has the feel of both worlds simultaneously. They both strip down thinking it would be better if he had a direct feel of them. But since it’s not going anywhere and Masayuki is blowing his top, the duo decide to form a truce and pretend to be on good terms. So when an opportunity arises, they’ll strike! Obviously their ‘handshake’ seems hostile… Masayuki is somewhat saved by the doorbell. Yuka’s classmate, Mai Takagi is here to see Yuka. When he brings her in, suddenly she becomes yandere! Oh wait. That’s not the right word to describe. Mai takes out a knife and sticks it at his neck! She wants his ‘seed’ so that she can have a child blood related o Yuka! Violent sick b*tch! Even her fantasy reflects how sadistic she is!!! But when Yuka tells her to stop, she transforms from a brutal chick into an innocent polite. Wow. It’s like she has 2 faces. But Mai gets the wrong idea that Masayuki’s perversion forced Yuka only in her panties and threatens to kill him. Till Yuka orders her to stop. Yes, ma’am! Mai learns about the truth, especially the rivalry. She and Shimizu become friends. Shimizu allows her to stay here as long as she wants and this makes Mai very happy as she clings onto Yuka, much to her dismay. This is all part of Shimizu’s sneaky plan because if Mai is around Yuka, the loli aunty will have her hands full and thus nobody will get in her way for Masayuki.

Masayuki and his harem are travelling to the beach. Due to the limited seat arrangement, Shimizu is sitting on top of his lap and her boobs might be suffocating him, if not deprive him of the beautiful scenery outside. It seems that Masayuki’s seat will be seen as normal by others due to the ‘barrier’. What barrier? Who cares about that because in order for this ‘barrier’ to work, the girls paid a price and wear nothing underneath!!! And then it descends into a competition to show Masayuki what is underneath. I don’t know how he stomached the rest of the ride. At the beach, Masayuki becomes clumsy, spilling and tripping on the slippery sun lotion. This causes him to somehow strip Shimizu and Ozono’s swimsuit. What great timing. Girls usually slap the guys for this but instead, they feel stimulated! They want to continue but he runs off somewhere. He comes into Yuka and Mai playing watermelon smashing. Evil Mai gets an idea to bury Masayuki’s head next to the water so that Yuka can smash it. But Yuka has her own plan. When she gets close enough, she pretends to slip so that she could kiss him. Mai won’t allow that to happen and gets in between. Masayuki got his face in Mai’s lower anatomy (which he finds very suffocating) while Mai got her hands all over Yuka’s boobs. Strange position indeed.

Masayuki can breathe a sigh of relief in the hotspring since he is the only one there. But on the other side of the fence, the girls start getting horny with their fantasies of doing it with him at night. Ozono has got to be the best one because she proposes a fivesome between them all! Masayuki the monster! Since they were fantasizing so loud, annoyed Masayuki heard everything and yells back he won’t do something like that ever. Yup. I think he’s really gay… That night, Masayuki couldn’t sleep and also sees Shimizu up. He is glad that they come for this trip. Suddenly Shimizu lands a lovely kiss on his lips. What was that for? Well, you thought it was something genuinely romantic, right? Apparently it is her scheme to make him horny so that he won’t be able to resist. Unfortunately he isn’t so she becomes embarrassed that she spoke her thoughts aloud. But Masayuki didn’t panic as usual because he has gotten used to it all. Really? Then I will guess that in no time, having an orgy would also become the norm…

Help Yourself…
Somehow I didn’t find the ecchi and horniness of those fantasies to be as bad as Kagaku Na Yatsura or Nozoki Ana. Am I saying that I have gotten used to it? Am I immune to it?! I hope not. While I still maintain that hentai animes are disgusting and will never touch them (unless some sort of mind changing ‘miracle’ happens), as far as this series is concern, perhaps classifying it to borderline ecchi and hentai is an overstatement. Sure, there are those imaginary sex scenes but those necessary spots are not shown and they last very short. While of course they are stimulating, sometimes I find it funny. I don’t know. Maybe it’s because when they start fantasizing and that scene was supposed to be funny, I thought those horny scenes were funny too. Ecchi fans should be happy with such scenes of all those glorious tits and ambiguous sexual positions and moaning. Must have given your 2 cents worth of buying this OVA, eh?

So what are the chances that suddenly 4 girls come up to a guy and want to get horny with him? Okay, maybe 3 of them but even so the real rivalry seems to be between Shimizu and Yuka while Ozono is just passive. Mai is only interested in Yuka so I see no reason why she would want to get down and dirty with him unless it is just some orgy fantasy as Ozono suggested. I think the best girl is Mai because of her killer instinct. She can turn into an insane killer anytime. Better watch your crotch and don’t ever end up alone with this crazy girl. For Masayuki to be surrounded with gorgeous babes and not to be stimulated, he must be a very disciplined guy or just gay… I want to suspect the latter but I don’t think it’s fair and possible. Because if Masayuki was horny in the first place and he grants the girls’ wishes of getting horny, I think half the fun is lost. You know, one reason why girls like to tease the guy and show their seductive side is to see his embarrassing reaction. If he was, I don’t think they’d be that interested in him. That’s why losers like Matsushita can only envy and watch from afar while people like Masayuki gets all the girls like as though they fall down from Heaven and into his hands. Or lap. Wherever. We all know this is not going to happen in real life so for us otaku loser guys, it’s like some sort of escapism relishing this kind of anime. Don’t you agree?

I suppose people are here for the fanservice and not the character development since I would say there is none. We are quickly introduced to the characters and their little quirks before it descends into some sort of horny imaginary sexual fantasy. That’s what this anime is all about, right? And for Masayuki to say that he has gotten used to everything at the end, it is a sign that he has accepted the rowdiness and ecchi situations. And more to come, I believe. In no time, all those fantasies might just become true if his true beast within awakens. Then they will know what true terror is! Haha! One little disappointment is about the maid part. This is just my personal opinion. Since Shimizu was never in one, it doesn’t feel like she is a maid at all. Yeah, a little dissatisfaction in that area. And for a bright student to be doing this? Well, it shows that not is all what it seems on the outside. I wonder if this is love. Yes, sure Shimizu does like him but the nature of everything feels like lust is more prominent than love. Just like how I feel the other girls are too. So if lust = love, would sex be acceptable? Well, that would be like thinking with the other lower anatomy instead of the one at the top.

Okay, I promise and vow not to be persuaded to watch anymore future animes that are closely borderline hentai and ecchi. Serious. Even if they put in a real maid in it, I won’t be tempted. I’m sure there are lots of hentai series with maids in it and so far it has been a good thing for me that I didn’t garner a single interest in watching them. Now the problem is what constitutes just simple ecchi and serious hentai. The line between them has blurred that it is tougher to tell. The only way is to watch and find out. And hope that the true horniness does not awaken within me…