Sob! Sob! SOB!!! SOB!!! Boo hoo!!! I’m crying because I am both happy and sad. Happy that Tantei Opera Milky Holmes: Psycho No Aisatsu special has finally been subbed! At the same time I’m a very sad panda because this is going to be the last Milky Holmes episode ever!!! NOOOO!!!! Oh no! OH NO!!! Milky Holmes my dearest, we’ve been together hot and cold throughout the years. Together with your silly antics and dumb retard actions. I thought we’d always be together. Sob, sob. I thought we will always go on forever like how the way things are. Sob, sob. But now, looks like reality has smacked us in the face. It is time to graduate. Time to move on. Sob, sob, sob… And hence this final graduation episode that did a crossover with that Cardfight Vanguard anime, we’re going to see how well you have grown into great detectives. Sob, sob, sob… Oh, I just can’t take it anymore. I just can’t… *Continues to bawl like a baby*.

Down memory lane…
Oh my. Milky Holmes really doing an impressive run with their detective work and putting dumb useless G4 to shame? Uhm, that’s how it should be? Well, okay. Arsene hears Milky Holmes talks about wanting to graduate. Hence she is in a dilemma as she ponders if it is still too early for them but nevertheless, she will give them a final test to prove their worth. Thus Phantom Thief Empire steals a precious card from Aichi Sendo (that protagonist from Cardfight Vanguard). She has left a message for Milky Holmes and is waiting for them to show up but it is Feathers who pop up instead. I guess they need to get some fame too and asked Milky Holmes for permission. Go ahead, girls! And with that… Feathers get brutally owned by Arsene! Don’t waste my time! Poor Feathers return to report to Milky Holmes and with some memories thingy blabbing from Sherlock, I guess they’re taking up the case. So as part of the memory lane trip, they pass by several places they have been before in search of Arsene. Finally they stumble into Arsene and her men. Time for some epic fight. Remember how Twenty can shoot his nipples like projection? Somehow he lost a rock-paper-scissors fight to Cordelia. And why is Hercule holding Stone River’s sword? She acts like a girl being stalked so that’s enough to defeat him. Nero summons the cats to lick on Rat. I guess that works too. The real epic showdown between Arsene and Sherlock… Interrupted by some memories thingy. Suddenly Kokoro intercepts to handcuff Arsene. OMFG! Stupid Kokoro just usurp and took all the credit? I guess she and her G4 are being dumb obnoxious cocky lying b*tches that she agrees to just get arrested by them. Laugh while you can, Kokoro… Badmouth Milky Holmes all you want, Kokoro… Because Milky Holmes seems to be taking all this well and in good spirits. Ah well. Time to go home. Meanwhile G4’s HQ is being decimated as Arsene easily destroyed and broke her way out. Not laughing anymore now, eh? Kokoro is the most badly bruised but don’t worry, Irene still loves how cute you look.

Milky Holmes is summoned to the hall and looks like it is really graduation for them. Henriette rolls in their final task. Uhm, does this bomb disposal task look familiar? If they manage to stop the bomb in one minute, a surprise also awaits them. Spoilers: Past characters in the series are waiting behind the door to congratulate them. And so we see Milky Holmes being f*cking confident in doing this. So much so they start off by singing a song!!! 5 seconds left to go… They easily use their toys to disarm the bomb and take the envelope within. Oh my. They are truly competent! Inside the envelope contains their graduation certificates. But why is Milky Holmes looking sad and disappointed? Actually when they talked about graduation, they meant graduating from their attic dorm. Oh my. Henriette feels so embarrassed that she was the one that misinterpreted the situation. What now? She goes to tell all those past characters that the surprise party is cancelled. Go home. Get out. Scram! And they came so far for this… And so Henriette graduates them from the attic dorm. We see this is all a plan by Mori Arty to move them out. Not sure if she is going to stay here now but she is definitely keeping it clean. Milky Holmes each have their own rooms. Sleeping comfortably? Not quite. Because they all gather and sleep together like the crammed style they are so used to. Nothing like the old times. With Milky Holmes becoming competent detectives to chase after Arsene, uhm, maybe some things don’t change too since they are still clumsy…

Milky Holmes: Homey Homecoming
Oh really? That was it? Sure they aren’t going to pull off a fast one and prank us that there will be another special by the end of this year? You sure about that? Not trying to do Gintama style of trolling and keep long time fans like yours truly surprised and happy? No? I guess this is it then. Time to really, really, really face reality. So this final Milky Holmes special really does hit the feels as we see the typical clichés that really made the Milky Holmes franchise funny and cute as we know them. Of course there was one season where it was really serious and truly competent Milky Holmes (there was also that Alternative alternative) but as far as this final special is concerned, they balance it all out. What I mean is that Milky Holmes still maintain their retard ways but they are not as much as a retard before and they have shown to have control over their Toys now. I believe that Arsene too was feeling sad to see that Milky Holmes graduated. That is why when she head they aren’t really into graduating from school, you can feel that she heaved a sigh of relief and kicked out those past characters. Well, Milky Holmes will still be doing detective work after graduation but being in school, this means Arsene can continue to play as their mentor and guide them as Henriette. So yeah, maybe after being so long with them, I don’t think Arsene really wants to say goodbye so suddenly like that. Let’s keep the status quo for now, shall we?

This special might not be able to incorporate everything that would make us feel totally nostalgic about Milky Holmes because otherwise it would have been a recap episode. Hence it is nice to see some of the things making their short cameo like those characters and places. G4 is also much welcomed with their cameo especially dumb IQ boasting Kokoro who is still as obnoxious and bratty as ever. It is amazing G4 haven’t got fired yet. Nice for Feathers to also make their cameo but so as not to steal the limelight from their senpai, I guess it’s too bad they had to get some beat down. Mori Arty still mysterious in her agenda and all but she could be just a normal girl for all we know. Initially I thought Milky Holmes was going to have some card-like fighting theme like Yugioh, because you know, Cardfight Vanguard crossover. But this feels more like a side distraction and they could have taken other themes like Pokemon’s Pikachu getting kidnapped or some device from Digimon gets stolen whatsoever. So the only running joke to remind us about this crossover is the fact that Milky Holmes cannot remember Aichi’s name and spout it out totally as a different name altogether. Only Hercule remembers but nobody listens…

It is really sad and it really hits the feels in the heart when the ending theme, Soshite Gunjou Ni Toketaiku by Milky Holmes is such a sweet and lovely ballad. So sweet and lovely that it almost sounds like a song that is played at high school graduation ceremonies! Oh damn. Here I was holding back my tears and then they had to play this song? You really want me to bawl over mah dummies?! I mean, my detective angels?! Oh well. Sherlock, whatever crap you said about those memories thingy, I don’t really remember nor understand, but I think I kinda know what it means for a long running (technically) series to have its final send off episode. It is sad that it has ended but also remember, be happy for all the antics and fun that they have brought to us in almost 10 years span. And so the opera curtains finally draw to a close. Thank you, Milky Holmes. Thank you for everything. Eyes getting blurry, nose getting stuffy, voice getting croaky… I think I need another pack of tissues…

On a trivial note, I wonder why this special is named as Psycho No Aisatsu, literally meaning, a psychotic greeting. Hmm… Could it be a play on the word saikou (the greatest)? Either way, Milky Holmes has always greeted us in the most Milky Holmes of fashion and with this final, it is rather Psycho No Sayonara (a psychotic goodbye) AKA Saikou No Sayonara (the greatest goodbye). Once again, thank you Milky Holmes.

Raz Dva Tri Chetyre! Wao~ssu! Waiwaiwaiwai shicatte! More lolicon maid for me. At least Uchi No Maid Ga Uzasugiru OVA is just a single episode released for the BDs. But you can expect more or less the same kind of antics from the bunch of characters if you have watched the TV series. A certain maid with killer abs and an extreme unhealthy fetish for little girls freaking out this particular half Russian half Japanese loli whom she is taking care of and the latter is trying to reject her unhealthy love but at the same time find it hard to things without her while trying to carry on her normal life after her mom’s death. Life has never been so fun-cum-annoying…

Part 1
Hotspring episode! More precisely, a resort spa thanks to Midori’s parents’ hospitality. Sure, the TV series had that but it was interrupted with Misha getting lost. Now we can feast our eyes in peace with lolis and maids in swimsuits all day long! Sort of. Misha invites Mimika and Yui here. Of course, Tsubame came uninvited although she claims it is to protect her from the filthy views of lolicon perverts. Is she talking about herself? With Midori looking mature in her swimsuit, Tsubame can’t stop getting nose bleeds from the loli swimsuit fanservice. Hence they tease her to take off the cover of her swimsuit before it gets blood soaked. Well, if you can stomach those abs and muscles. Tsubame acts all violated being seen in public. But it’s just a silly ploy to make Misha take responsibility and sign this marriage agreement. Please don’t ruin the fun. And so we see the lolis having their fun and a few times almost ruined thanks to Tsubame being a lolicon jerk. But thanks to the great security, our lolis’ chastity and fun are protected. As they change and prepare to leave for home, Misha realizes something grave. On the way home, Tsubame could tell from the way she sheepishly walks. Yup, she isn’t wearing any pantsu. She was so excited that she came wearing her swimsuit underneath and forgot to pack an extra pair. This gives Tsubame the excuse to go all out to protect her secret garden. WTF… Excuse for her to get suspicious at everything that threatens her oujo-sama’s secret garden. I wonder if this is an excuse to take advantage and get some herself. But thankfully no untoward incidents. But a few steps from home, suddenly there is a typhoon! Damn, the heavens even want to peek at Misha?! Before Misha is about to give up, Tsubame f*cking Falcon Punches the sky!!! WTF???!!! IT WORKED???!!! Pure coincidence but still WTF. When they finally reach home, Midori asks why she didn’t just buy a pair on the way home. Oh…

Part 2
Misha watches an anime about a very clumsy maid. I guess it’s for fanservice because each time she slips, her pantsu is showing. This prompts Misha to think anyone can be a maid. However Tsubame shockingly slaps some common sense into her about fiction and reality. Then something about how reality doesn’t have people take maids seriously and how this anime’s maid lacks ambition, etc. With Misha getting irk, she carelessly says she can prove by doing all that by being a maid. I guess she fell into Tsubame’s trap. Because now she has to make good her words and this loli maid outfit Tsubame made, I suppose she was waiting for this day to put it on her. Even Yasuhiro can’t help snap a pic of his lovely daughter. One for the road! With Misha bent on getting through this, she’ll do what it takes and doesn’t want Tsubame to help. Otherwise it would be meaningless if she is shown the tropes. So we see Misha doing the chores and getting clumsy but without the fanservice. When she is about to clean her late mom’s workroom, she realizes it is tough being a parent or a maid to do such chores every day. She gets her resolve to continue being a maid for the day and makes a delicious curry dinner for herself and the maids. I wonder if the meal is ruined when Tsubame suddenly says I love you to her. She explains it is because she gets to see how Misha has grown up and showing her different sides. Hence her love just keeps growing. But Misha knows the game she is playing. Because Misha has confiscated her handphone and shows all the secret photos that she has taken while Misha was being as a maid. So engrossed in watching her that she didn’t realize her pets helped stole it from her pocket. Now you know why Tsubame wants her to be a maid? Pressured, Tsubame tries to explain herself but of course being blindly positive that she’s doing this for the future of their children isn’t going to cut it. Misha deletes everything. Best gift ever.

Desperate Housemaids
Still fun, still funny, still cute, still annoying. Nothing really much to expect here. No twists or revelations of any sorts like suddenly incorporating a new maid character into the mix. Just the same ol’ Tsubame using every excuse she has to justify her lolicon tendencies towards Misha and every failure makes her even more determined. Oh well, like they say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Misha, her strength and weakness both in one package. Misha is still hanging in there quite well as a kid. With her knowing how to play Tsubame’s game at times, I am confident that she won’t grow up into a psychotic traumatized person. I don’t think she hates maids. Just Tsubame in particular she dislikes. Stress on the word, dislike. If she did hate maids, Midori would be no different but Misha still accepts her a lot more than Tsubame. Speaking of Midori, she is still the same masochist in every perverted way. Even things going her way has her thinking it is just to give her false hope and then make her come crashing down in despair. You gotta love her twisted logic. Yui is still wanting to challenge Misha for whatever reasons and this short part feels unnecessary so as to just solidify her character for the sake of that. Since that whatever challenge she threw down to her didn’t really materialize anyway.

So this OVA didn’t really break the mould or change anything in particular. Anybody who watched the TV series would feel really comfortable at home with all the familiar stuffs and settings. Just add a bit of lolicon swimsuit fanservice and a very idiotic and clumsy in-anime maid fanservice. Thankfully I’m not a lolicon so I didn’t get turn on seeing lolis in swimsuits. Misha looks cute in a maid outfit too but I didn’t drool over her like a certain lolicon pervert did. She should be the star of the next season (if that ever happens) as she takes over being her own maid! Uchi No Maid Ga Watashi Da! It is somewhat true that in reality, people don’t take maids seriously. Because instead of cleaning, cooking and doing the laundry (like what maids are supposed to do!), maids are now there to serve you omelette rice meals with your name or whatever written in ketchup, then chant the magical good luck charm, “Oishiku nare!” to make it become tasty. WTF?! Do maids actually do that kind of stuff???!!! Moe~! Kyun~! Thank you Japan, for helping to rebrand the image of maids worldwide. Banzai meido!!!

Last season, we had a loli who was being very much annoyed by her lolicon maid. She is forced to be around her because nobody else takes care of her and her daily needs. For this season, we now have a loli who is being very much annoyed by a lolicon NEET. Sort of. She is forced to be around her because nobody else makes great sugary sweets like she does. Ah yes, it’s this season’s cute girl doing cute doings and loli yuri genre combined together, Watashi Ni Tenshi Ga Maiorita. I suppose nobody bats an eyelid when the lolicon offender is female and we’ll all be instead be fawning over the cuteness and the comedy that it has to offer. Imagine, a male lolicon would have cancelled this series forever and its only viable option is on the black market. So how will our lolis fare against the lolicon in this series? I think we all know how it will generally turn out. Bonds, people. Bonds…

Episode 1
Miyako Hoshino sleeps in the morning and when she wakes up, she makes herself a wonderful French toast. Her little sister, Hinata returns from school but she also brought her friend home, Hana Shirosaki. At that instant, Miyako instantly fell in love with Hana’s cuteness. Oh dear. Not another lolicon. Miyako thinks of ways of becoming Hana’s friend. Including dressing up suspiciously? No wonder Hinata got scared and beat the hell out of her. Hana rejects Miyako’s offer to be her friend until Hinata points out she has no friends! Yeah, became her friend out of pity. Too bad Miyako is acting like a pervert that makes Hana on full alert and threatening to call the police. Hinata’s secret to make her docile again is to feed her. A week later, Miyako must be having withdrawal syndromes without Hana so she thought Hinata could invite Hana over. She didn’t want at first but relents. Best still, she is coming for a sleepover. When Hana arrives, she wears this ‘ugly’ character shirt. WTF is this Higero?! It’s her favourite character? Miyako doesn’t want to offend her and says it is cute. Miyako watches Hana’s cuteness as she eats her pudding. With Hinata pointing out how ugly Higero is, Hana becomes suspicious that Miyako lied. I guess she’ll bring something cuter than that ugly thing. Hana looks cuter in this gothic dress but with Miyako taking unauthorized pics of her, Hana’s done for the day. Miyako pleads for her to wear more cosplay costumes that she makes in exchange for unlimited sweets. I guess that’s not a bad deal. Hana is rewarded with delicious sweets but learns they are all made by Miyako. She fears that she must rely on this pervert for sweets. Oh, to think that Miyako will get bored with her and throw her away. Where will she get her sweets then?! Oh the dilemma! But I think it is creepier since Miyako says she’ll continue to do this for the next 20 years! When mom returns, she wants to lolis to go take a bath while she talks to Miyako. When they come out, they see her being hung out to dry. Mom got mad for feeding the lolis before dinner time. I guess Miyako’s respite is that both the lolis get to sleep with her. However with Hinata moving too much, eventually they have to sleep on the floor. And Hinata thought both of them move too much… When nobody is around, Miyako dresses up as a magical girl while spouting and doing magical girl action. Imagine if someone saw her doing all that, she would die in embarrassment. Like that blonde loli, Noa Himesaka across her home!!! Isn’t that house supposed to be empty? Looks like they just moved in. Pale, shining miracle flower, White Lily! Miyako is so dead…

Episode 2
Hinata not only brings Hana home but Noa too! As Hinata and Hana are not aware that Miyako wears her own cosplay costumes, we can see that smirk in Noa’s eyes. Uh huh. She’ll keep that a secret in exchange for doing anything she wants. Gulp. Thankfully Noa wants to cosplay too. When it is Hana’s turn to cosplay, Noa is shocked that Miyako goes into beast mode snapping away. She is in disbelief that Hana is cuter than her. Even asking Miyako herself, she didn’t bat an eyelid to say Hana is cuter! With Noa obsessed being the cutest, all of them are going to cosplay and Miyako will be the judge. Hana is cute in cosplay. But can she beat Hana who isn’t even trying and trying to pretend to lose as she wears Miyako’s jersey?! Miyako giving infinite points! Hinata cosplays as Higero and because Hana is so happy, Miyako gives her full marks. Miyako is forced to cosplay too seeing all the lolis want to see her. White Lily has arrived. But here is the ‘good news’. At least Miyako looks cuter than Noa in it. WTF… Since it is raining, the lolis suggest playing hide and seek indoors. Yeah, Miyako got dragged into it. With Noa as it, she sings until her song finishes while the rest hide. Coincidentally Miyako and Hana choose the same hiding place. When Noa is done, Hinata is first to be found. Actually she was hiding on the ceiling and her weak arms eventually gave way. The duo now start to look for the rest. They thought of tempting Hana out of with some sweets and she almost took the bait had not Hana smell something sweet on Miyako. She was baking cake (hey, I thought she just woke up from sleep?). With Hana mesmerized by her sweet smell and getting too close, Miyako can’t take any more of this tempting close proximity and bursts out of her hiding. Oops, she broke the door. And mom just returned. Looks like it’s game over. Later Noa has another cosplay contest. This time Hana cosplays while the rest will take pictures and judge her. I think Hana just wants out of it so she just says Noa will always be cute. Noa is mad that Miyako is taking pictures of her normally instead of her usual beast mode with Hana. Hinata must be the best because she gives Miyako’s jersey to her to cosplay. Noa now depressed. They think it is best to lift her spirits but Hinata physically lifts her! For that moment, Noa has the cutest face they’ve ever seen.

Episode 3
The class will be making original board games and guess what is Hinata’s suggestion? Making a board game theme using Miyako! So they’ve completed it and bring it home to play. The catch is that certain squares, Miyako must do what it is written. She is reluctant at first but after seeing some squares in her favour, let’s play! However the first square needs her to smile and greet. She can’t even do that?! Feeling embarrassed?! Finally when the square has her to hug a person, now she goes into perverted mode trying to hug Hana. Hana insists but Miyako persists. How? Hana slaps her away! Miyako learns that they made this board game in consideration of her. It is to rehabilitate and help her overcome her shyness of other people. Yeah, the teacher gave them good grades for this concept! Miyako promises to try harder tomorrow so they don’t have to worry about her. But come next morning, she doesn’t feel like doing it and procrastinates tomorrow. When Hinata wants to sleep in Miyako’s room, not tonight because she is completing dresses for her friends when they come over tomorrow. In school, Hinata seems to be asserting she loves her sister since forever. On their way back, the trio play this shadow game as they only step on places that has shadow throughout the journey. Yup, don’t mind ‘borrowing’ a random stranger to hide counts too. I guess Hinata got too tired trying to run after a truck so back home as she ‘replenishes’ herself in Miyako’s lap, Miyako ignores her and gives the cookies she makes to her friends. The last straw came when Miyako didn’t have time to make Hinata’s share of cosplay. She gets mad and runs away. Nobody except Hana knows why but I’m sure she’s not telling. Hinata continues to sulk as Miyako tries to figure out. In the bath, she remembers Hinata as a baby was always happy with her and followed her around. She gives Hinata a hug and will play with her until bedtime. So with Miyako allowing Hinata to sleep with her every night, let’s hope Hinata’s sleep strangling won’t kill her sister. Hinata brags to Hana how the sisters are doing things every day. Until Hana says she is an only child. Hinata feels a bit guilty and allows her to ‘borrow’ Miyako sometimes. Nope. Don’t need her at all.

Episode 4
Summer vacation is here. I guess the pool at the back of their house will do. Noa notices Miyako didn’t go bananas over Hana. She admits she isn’t a fan of school swimsuit that Hana is in. Does this mean Noa is the cutest today? So as not to hurt her feelings, Miyako agrees. That is when Noa tells Hana what Miyako said. With Miyako trying to explain herself, this proves she lied. And this is her punishment. So now Miyako is at a lost trying to explain to Hana but she doesn’t care about who is being the cutest. With Hana borrowing her jacket to cover up, Miyako finds her super cute and starts taking pictures of her. Noa gets jealous and splashes water at them. As the lolis bath, Hinata sneaks in shaved ice to eat secretly. But they hear Miyako’s voice and panic. Now it’s dropped inside their bath. Wasted. The trio now have clay crafting for homework. Hinata is trying to do Miyako’s head but it got bumped and looks out of place. Apparently Miyako is pretty popular in their class thanks to Hinata praising her. Imagine how disappointed everyone will be when they see the real deal. Hana wants to make Higero and this has Noa conflicted over the definition of cute. Because if Noa is cute and Higero is also cute, are they the same category?! But Hinata is brutally honest saying she still doesn’t find Higero cute. After the friends leave, Miyako finds her clay head sitting on the cupboard as decoration! Horror! Our lolis dress up in yukata to head to the festivals. Meanwhile their classmates, Koyori Tanemura and Kanon Konomori are also there and playing some games. Koyori is super bad luck with everything while Kanon just needs the first try to win big. In the crowded festival, Miyako thinks she can secretly take photos of the lolis. Too bad she gets arrested by the policewoman! With rumours that a voyeur camera was captured, it soon dawned to the lolis who this person is. Yeah, they saved her from the policewoman and you can tell Miyako was almost devastated. Noa forgives her since she was taking cute photos of her. Too bad most of them are on Hana. You lost again. Because Miyako has taken photos of them, this means Hana has paid her dues and now she must treat her. Okay. Now that Miyako agrees to treat the lolis, I guess she really does have deep pockets. All for their smile! Koyori and Kanon talk to Hinata and Noa about the voyeur. Bad explanation and jumping to conclusions had them think it was the awesome Miyako who caught the voyeur. Yeah, can’t really wait to meet her, huh?

Episode 5
The lolis make cookies. Hana is going to be a very strict QC while Koyori who is trying so hard to help is just making a mess out of things. Don’t make Hana mad… Koyori thinks others will rely on her to make cookies but none did. So she thinks Hana will probably do that and joins her in making them. It is no surprise why their cookies turned out burnt. While they are relishing the delicious cookies of Kanon, they talk about the greatness of Miyako. So smart, so athletic, so beautiful, so etc. Yeah, the rumours have really gone out of hand. They really want to go meet her and Noa is worried. When she tries to confirm the rumours with Hinata, she also believes them! Please face reality! So Noa had to rush home to warn Miyako about this. Yeah, the time has come when people will laugh and be disappointed at her. Don’t worry. Just follow Noa’s orders. Firstly, Miyako dresses up in a gothic outfit to make herself look presentable. But when Koyori and Kanon arrive, they are impressed although Miyako says nothing out of being shy. When Miyako cannot handle it anymore, she makes a tearful apology about the lies. However Kanon forgives her because despite her fears, she still tried hard to be that amazing person. And she is still overall the kindest sister ever. Oh my. Such great words. Is Kanon Buddha?! Koyori isn’t mad either because this means she can rely on her. Speaking of which, Miyako has a request. Yeah, cosplay time. Seeing the frenzy, inside Kanon’s brain must be like, “Abandon mission! Abandon mission!”. Haha! In class nobody relies on Koyori despite being the class rep, much to her dismay. Yeah, there’s a story to it. Something about losing everyone’s homework and they had to do it again. With Koyori really wanting Kanon to be obviously relied on her, hence she ties up her hand. Now she has to do everything for her. But when it comes to taking off the string, it won’t budge. Kanon could get out herself but she truly believes in relying on Koyori. She’s used to it. And some flashback how close they were since kindergarten. For the rest of the day, Kanon continues to have her hand tied (you mean the teacher didn’t do anything and just thought it was a trend?!) so Koyori brings her home and tries all sorts of methods to untie. Finally it comes undone and they both fall into the bath. It’s done. Now they can laugh over it.

Episode 6
The question we’ve all been asking for: What does Miyako do actually? She is about to head to university to hand in an assignment but the lolis don’t believe her! Especially Hana who is so disappointed to find out she’s not a NEET! Could Miyako be lying?! I mean, Hinata doesn’t even know as she has never seen her going to class! Well, that’s because she’s in school. Do we blame the lolis for being sceptical as they tail her to college? Yeah, she’s not lying. When they lose her in the crowd, a nice lady, Kouko Matsumoto takes them to tour around the campus for a while. When Miyako is done, she is surprised to see them. On the way back as they take a break, the lolis see a suspicious woman trying to ‘assault’ Miyako. She is actually Matsumoto and she claims she is Miyako’s friend. The lolis doubt her. Miyako has no friends! Even more so when Miyako has no recollection of who this person is. Matsumoto then changes her ‘status’. She is more of her rival. The way she explains their first meeting since high school seems to indicate she is her stalker! She wants to be like Miyako! The lolis are not convinced and threaten to call the cops so Matsumoto pretends to leave. Back home when Miyako feels her maid cosplay outfit doesn’t seem quite right on Hinata, here comes Matsumoto in the right maid outfit! Matsumoto and Hinata’s rivalry turn into praising Miyako since they’re both her ‘fans’. Matsumoto has also made the same outfit for Miyako and wants her to try. Reluctantly she does so and it fits perfectly. Now Miyako must know how Hana feels when she makes clothes without taking her measurements. More creepy ‘approvals’ from Matsumoto that just freaks Miyako out more than anything. Hana and Noa arrive and tell Miyako that her mom called her. More nervousness for her as she has to meet more strangers. They are actually Hana and Noa’s mom who are thankful to her because their daughters are less gloomy ever since they became her friends. Yeah, but Miyako can’t tell the activities they do… Will she be busted? Yeah, Matsumoto did. But they think Miyako wants to be a fashion designer so it’s okay. Phew. In the end, the lolis ‘officially approve’ Matsumoto as Miyako’s friend. Another weirdo to the mix.

Episode 7
Hinata is sick and she doesn’t even know it! Miyako skips class just to nurse her and Hinata is ecstatic that she gets to be with her all day. Although her sickness soon vanishes, she continues to be treated as though she is still one. Who wouldn’t love Miyako’s great hospitality? After her friends visit only did Hinata realize that she might have spread her illness to Miyako and is worried. Miyako doesn’t mind as long she gets better. Besides, she will then have a valid reason to stay home without getting scolding from mom. Today Miyako remembers it’s her birthday and suddenly Hinata is distraught! How could she have forgotten?! Yeah, it’s so bad that she’s crying about it. Who else will celebrate with her if she doesn’t remember?! Ouch. They discuss what to get for her. Hana for a day? Yes please! No way for Hana! So they make a coupon that allows Miyako to order them to do anything. Apparently you can see the scheming looks on her face that just creeps out Hana. A reminder not to do anything that makes Hinata sad, Miyako puts it away to use another day. Even though it’s her birthday, Miyako will make cake. Hana is excited to help but is told to stay out. Hence you can see her intense staring while Miyako bakes. So she tells her to do something else for an hour. Hana uses that time to buy a present. Miyako is so happy but Hana wants the coupon back! Yeah, since they’ve bought a real present, give that coupon back. Miyako desperate to keep it would rather buy the present. Three times the price! Hana just lets her keep both. As they all enjoy the cake, Matsumoto is late to the party thinking she can surprise Miyako in a maid outfit. They’re all already in maid outfits… Miyako notices Hinata really attached to her these days. Even wanting to follow her to the toilet! She learns this stems from the shock of forgetting her birthday so she’s in a ‘period of reinforcement’. Reasoning won’t do for her (not that Hinata understands how mom will kill Miyako if she turns out like her), Miyako is forced to use the coupon. Stay away from her for 5 days! Good chance to learn independence too. Devastated Hinata is so broken on day 1, what do you think day 2 holds? Yeah, she is near death in day 3! Miyako can’t break her promise or else she won’t learn so she gives Noa to dress up like her to lessen the impact. I suppose Hinata is so desperate that she gets attached to Noa! But Noa loves it because it means she gets all the attention! She thinks Hinata would even get attached to her forever! But once the time is over, immediately Hinata returns to Miyako! Noa so heartbroken. Feeling she was just a substitute, Hinata dismisses and claims she could only be Miyako is because she like her just as much. But Hinata’s clinging just got worse. I don’t think koalas are this attached! I wonder if she’s wrestling Miyako…

Episode 8
Mom lectures Miyako for being lazy and lacking fashion sense. Heck, Hinata is even more reliable than her! Of course Miyako is already whining like a kid when mom gives her money to go buy decent clothes. What is she going to do for her future? Miyako will let Hinata take care of her! Mom getting mad. Stop the jokes right now and get going. Luckily Hinata accompanies her otherwise how would Miyako handle the sales clerk who are pushy while interacting with her? But Hinata’s defence also ruins Miyako’s reputation since she keeps telling how shy she is of people. Can’t head back to that store ever again. Miyako gets this idea to buy fabric instead. Any extra fabric she can make clothes for Hana. With extra money, they go hang out and have fun. Meanwhile Hana and Noa learn the sisters are at the mall and head there to join them. However a lost puppy freaks out Hana. Yup, she has fear of dogs but Noa keeps teasing her with this cutie. Coincidentally, the dog is also named Miyako. I think it’s not coincidence because the owner is Matsumoto! It ran away when she was taking it for vaccination. However also missing is Matsumoto’s little sister, Yuu. Coincidence or fate, Yuu stumbles into Miyako and recognizes her. Eh? Who this little loli? Hinata is shocked if Yuu is some secret sister. It’s getting confusing when she thinks other lolis as her secret sister. Basically, everybody is everybody’s sister. So with the idea of Yuu being Hinata’s little sister, I guess that isn’t a bad idea after all. Yuu then has Miyako do some dog tricks. Miyako plays along and is unaware of what it means. Then the rest finds them as Matsumoto explains she showed Yuu lots of pictures of Miyako, that’s why she recognized her. Even that White Lily one. Oh sh*t… Matsumoto and Yuu leave but with Yuu being so politely cute, I guess it strikes a chord in everyone’s heart. Don’t you just want her to be your little sister? Noa also plays those dog tricks on Miyako and she obliges. When Miyako and Hinata return home, mom scolds Miyako for buying fabric instead of clothes. I suppose this was inevitable…

Episode 9
Noa’s mom gave tickets to a movie but since Miyako is busy with her college assignment, I guess she’ll just have to go with Hinata. It’s not like the movie is boring or anything. Just that Noa woke up early to make lunch and now she falls asleep. But later she is awakened when the cinema is a little bit too noisy. Is this part of the getup that young girls are supposed to scream and cheer for the heroine? After the movie, they go shopping. Hinata buys a Higero souvenir just for Hana and a hair ribbon for Noa. Back home, Miyako’s mom shows old pictures of her when she was young. Such a cute and good girl. But some of her photos have her during her chuunibyou period so Miyako is screaming in embarrassment. They notice she is always alone in every photo and vows to always be her friend. Sad. And some photos can be seen having Matsumoto stalking behind. Scary. Since mom never threw away those clothes, the lolis cosplay in it and they look as cute. Hana is forced too since she wants to eat Miyako’s snacks. Despite Hana’s plain Jane looks, Miyako finds her cute and imagines if she was the same age and goes to her school. Yeah, they can start dating but Miyako finds it so wrong. Eh? Miyako having conscious? The lolis stay over and after dinner and bath, they watch a horror movie. It is obvious that Hana is weak in horror genres despite she is bluffing about ghosts don’t exist because science would’ve proven it, blah, blah, blah. But seeing her in fear excites Miyako since she looks cute. Heck, she even plays a little jump scare prank. Then one jump scare from the movie has Hana hugging Miyako all over. Best movie ever! That night, Hana can’t sleep and needs to go to the toilet. Her friends are out (Hinata doing some choking move on Noa?!) so she has no choice to seek Miyako’s help. Still assuring that it’s not the horror effect? So why must Miyako stay until she’s done her business? And why must stay with you until you fall asleep? Miyako obliges as she feels nostalgic. Hinata used to be like that as she couldn’t fall asleep without her. Not to say that she changed much. Hana as the only child wished she had sisterly bonds. Miyako hopes she can call her onee-san. Hana cheekily does so to send her to heavenly dreamland. That should give her some peace.

Episode 10
After Miyako does up nicely Noa and Hinata’s hair, it seems Hana also want in. You mean this Hana allowing Miyako to touch her hair? Hana notes she bought her that hairpin present but she never used it. She doesn’t like part of her bangs covering her eyes. Although Miyako says she is shy with people, however she is okay with Hinata and Noa. This only insults Hana so she insists on doing Miyako’s hair. Horrible way to tie them like horns but this isn’t intentional. In fact, she thinks she did her best! Later Matsumoto is here. What’s the occasion? Their anniversary when they first met 2 years ago! Oh God… Matsumoto made a dress for her and in return, Miyako makes her some cookies. The way she says how she’ll eat them so as to be one as Miyako just feels creepy… Matsumoto and Hinata are close enough to have their own hand signals. Miyako and Hana are still one kind. So when Matsumoto asks about their relationship, Hinata points out it’s like Matsumoto wanting Miyako. Basically, kindred spirits? I think Hinata doesn’t understand that word so she agrees. As Miyako will be going to buy cream puffs tomorrow, one of the lolis is enough to accompany. Rock-scissors-paper to see who gets to go. Hinata becomes a sore loser when she loses to Hana. Even more so when she loses again. Next day, Miyako wears Matsumoto’s dress as they head out. Since the policewoman almost recognize this pervert, Miyako panics and runs away. Now that she’s lost, she is really panicking like a lost child! Thank goodness for Hana finding her and taking her hand. Damn, Hana is the mature one here. After lining up and buying the cream puffs, Hana eats them but doesn’t find them as good as Miyako’s. Miyako assures she will always make them for her but Hana doesn’t think they can do this forever. Even after lecturing her about being independent, Miyako tells her she’ll bake for her forever (why does this sound like an awkward confession?). This brightens up Hana’s day. Because she gets to eat sweets forever! Innocent lolis don’t lie. Aren’t they so adorable? For the school festival, the class will be doing a play and the leading role is to be decided via lottery. Those who really want to get the role like Koyori and Noa, didn’t. Yeah, Hana got it. She doesn’t look too happy…

Episode 11
While Miyako is happy that Hana got the lead part, the reason she was nominated in the first place was because Hinata thought that all nominees are supposed to be angels. And because Miyako always viewed Hana as her angel, hence she was nominated. In other words, it’s all your fault, Miyako! She is to take responsibility to make costumes for their play. After all, Hinata already promised the class that she will help. Dang. But Miyako manages to deflect this responsibility and convinces them to make it themselves. They’ll call Koyori and Kanon over too to help. Because many hands make light work, Hinata takes the liberty to call Matsumoto over. Oh… Koyori and Hana thought they can be useful but they are forced to sit out to reduce further damage. It seems that the mothers are also helping out at the school’s festival as the haunted house. Hana’s mom encourages Miyako to bring her daughter there despite knowing Hana is very weak with scary stuffs. You get to see her cute side, you know… Miyako’s mom is so happy that Miyako is attending this festival (since she skipped her own during her school days) and thinks she has already grown up. Wow. She must really have very low expectations of her. On the day of the festival, Miyako arrives but since she is still afraid of the crowd, dresses up like a suspicious person. When Hinata is summoned to the teacher’s room to ‘identify a suspicious person caught’, looks like it’s Miyako crying. Yeah, so fast the trauma has started. Hinata shows a stamp card in which if they go around and collect stamps, they will be able to get sweets as prize. We see them do various stuffs (Koyori even challenging them but failing hard) until they arrive at the haunted house. Obviously Hana is putting up a brave front. Her mouth might say she’s fine but her body reaction is a totally different story. Inside, it is obvious Hana is scared as hell. It culminates with her mom scaring the hell out of her. In the end, though Hana is mad about this, mom is glad since this is the first time she acted this way who isn’t part of the family. This means she has friends. So is this some sort of acknowledgement that Miyako and Hana are good with each other? Not only them, but Hinata and Noa are her good friends too. The lolis get an emergency summon since they are late for the play. Thankfully they arrive in time to prepare just before the play starts.

Episode 12
The entire three quarters is about the musical play. About Hana the angel who ponders about their job to bring love to human, can an angel find love too? She finds that in human girl Hinata but she realizes as a human, she would die first so no go. Hence Hana seeks permission to lose her angel status and become human just to be with her true love. She is warned that if Hinata doesn’t love her back, she will disappear. And so Hana does all that and even has to undergo some trekking trial across the mountains to reach Hinata’s village. But by the time she arrives, only Hinata’s granddaughter is around and grandma herself has passed on. But the granddaughter knows all about Hana since Hinata often told tales about the angel and Hana is left happy when she bakes her signature cake for her. Then they all reunite together in heaven again once they pass on. OH MAN!!! This play is so deep!!! I don’t think it is written for kids but heck, they really pulled it off with this one! No wonder this gets a standing ovation. In the aftermath, Miyako is called by the teacher. She fears she is going to get scolded but it is to thank her for making clothes for the play. And since the other classmates also thank her, damn Miyako has become a star now! How did this turn into a handshaking event?! She’s hanging in there… But eventually manages to slip out and run away. Hana finds her and they talk. Hana notes despite she is super shy, she can get things done when she puts her mind to it. And that is a good thing about her she likes. I’m sure this gives Miyako a lot of motivation but it’s back to the handshaking event… Oh dear… The mothers then hold an after party at Miyako’s home to celebrate their success. Hana realizes she forgot to hand in the stamp card but Miyako will gladly bake her sweets in exchange. Later when Miyako is relaxing in the bath alone, she realizes the festival is fun and decides to attend her own university festival. Then all the lolis barge in to ruin her personal time.

Special 1
The lolis go camping at the mountains. Initially Miyako didn’t want to come and prefer to stay home but with the rest forcing her, here she is. She tries to give excuses to not join them in the fun like not bringing any swimsuit or she is the camerawoman but the rest already came prepared for it. You’re in for the ride, like it or not. So we see them having loads of fun splashing water in the lake, preparing and enjoying their BBQ, roasting marshmallows and playing sparklers. Before bedtime, suddenly they hear something rustling in the leaves. The lolis get scared it might be a bear (or a ghost!) so Miyako feels the need to protect them (despite being a chicken herself). Turns out this ‘predator’ is Matsumoto. When she heard about the camp, she also wanted to come but got lost after looking for a toilet. Matsumoto gets the last laugh and the best prize as she snaps a shot of sleeping Miyako in the morning.

Special 2
Matsumoto narrates how she has been watching over Miyako ever since they first met and their bonds are growing stronger and closer each time. Getting closer and closer until they finally met. That means Miyako accidentally bumping her head into Matsumoto? Weird.

Special 3
Miyako realizes Halloween is one big cosplay event and she will use this chance to take pictures of Hana in her Halloween costume to her heart’s content. As she waits for the lolis, she starts imagining what kind of cute costume Hana will be in. Ah, she might be at the door now. Nope. Just Matsumoto (Where’s Wally?) and Yuu (pumpkin girl?). Matsumoto wants her to wear this fairy costume she made. Miyako refuses until Yuu’s innocent eyes pleads her pretty please. Damn. She feels so cursed after wearing it and learning how Matsumoto put her every heart and soul into it, just thinking about Miyako. Beyond creepy… Later the other lolis arrive. Cute little costumes. Trick or treat! Such lovely treat for Miyako, eh? She is now waiting for the ‘biggest prize’ in terms of Hana to show up. Can you guess what costume she shows up in? Drum roll… Zombie Higero!!! OMFG! Miyako so disappointed…

Special 4
We go back in time when Hinata was about to be born. Miyako couldn’t wait to see her. When Hinata finally came into this world, she couldn’t stop crying. So mom gave Miyako hold her new born baby sister and instantly she stopped crying. Wow. Her first word is “Mya…”? Miyako hopes they will forever get along with each other. Yeah, you don’t know how much of a leech she’ll become…

Fallen Angel: Gochuumon Wa Tenshi Desu Ka?
So seasons in and seasons out, this sort of genre has somewhat becoming numbing to me. Yeah, the irony of me still watching this genre means I really love it, huh? Therefore when the overall series is literally about cute girls doing cute things, this is some sort of veto that stamps out all need to have any sort of storyline whatsoever. Everyone will be so awed and amazed by the cuteness of these girls that they don’t need a story or plot to be convinced to keep watching it week after week. Yeah. Anime lolis are like your visual drugs. Thanks Japan, for introducing the world to lolicon and ‘legal paedophilia’ and open up a whole new world of possibilities. It is that angel musical play that I should say made the final stretch of this series very interesting because it was just different than the usual. Maybe in an alternate timeline, there was really such a thing and perhaps it would be Miyako and her loli angel.

Lacking a storyline, the characters come to play. Like I’ve said, I have watched so many of this genre that it is starting to feel numb and generic. Basically this kind of genre follows the tried and tested formula and it doesn’t really stray far from that kind of formula that you find in other series like YuruYuri and Mitsuboshi Colors. Thus fundamentally you can identify the main characters here based on their ‘obsession’ and fears. Once you understand that, it becomes also serves as the standard running joke when the scene calls for it.

So don’t be surprised at all when you realize that Miyako wants nothing but Hana and fears being in public. Hinata wants nothing but her big Mya-nee and fears not to be by her side. Noa wants nothing but to be called the cutest thing ever and fears otherwise. Hana wants nothing but sweets and fears scary things and animals. Initially I wanted to list down as cosplay as her fears but it isn’t that sort that would turn out to be a phobia and by the way, didn’t she get used to it? Koyori wants nothing more than to be relied on and fears nobody would ask her for help. Matsumoto wants nothing more to be Miyako’s friend and fears of that friendship being severed. I guess the only normal girl who doesn’t want anything much nor do we know what her fears are, is Kanon. Nice friendly girl who helps out in need. Hence the other half of this running joke for Koyori that other people would go to rely on than the class rep herself.

So it is basically a hit and/or miss for these characters. It gives them their so called unique personality and it might look charming and/or funny for newcomers but ‘veterans’ like yours truly, we’ve seen this a dozen times over the past years. It all boils down to the bonds they have, the times spent together that really matters despite their flaws. Like Miyako might be a failure as an adult (is she serious in wanting Hinata to take care of her till she dies?!) and definitely not a role model for the lolis (the lolis look like they make better adults than this college girl) but she is not entirely a bad person. Heh. At least there is some progress in her becoming a functional member of society, right? Right?! I hope when she says she will always be with Hana, that means allowing her to grow up into a proper adult. You know how lolicons hate the fact and will never accept the reality that young little girls do grow up with the passage of time. And the bottom line as such is that everybody is having fun, no actual harm were done and since this moment will never last forever, why not just let them do as they please. It’s called making memories. Sighs. Carry on, girls. After all, Miyako isn’t entirely a female lolicon like that certain lolicon maid as she is only obsessed into Hana and not other lolis. So I suppose all is not lost. But still a lot of room for improvement needed for Miyako.

The art and animation style reeks a lot of loli and yuri cuteness. And if you think the characters sometimes look like YuruYuri or Uchi No Maid Ga Uzasugiru characters, that’s because Doga Kobo animates this series. Cute loli characters are their forte as seen in New Game, Gabriel Dropout, Sansha Sanyou, Hina Logi: From Luck & Logic, Himouto! Umaru-chan, Anima Yell, Mikakunin De Shinkouke, Love Lab and GJ-Bu to name a few. Some character designs feel a bit familiar for instance I thought Kanon looked a bit like Yuno from Hidamari Sketch and Koyori looking like a tamer version of the titular character from Ueno-san Wa Bukiyou. I guess I’ve seen so many animes that the blonde loli like Noa and long black hair loli like Hana, I think I’ve seen them from somewhere before but can’t put my finger on it. I wonder if that Higero character is based on Pakalu Papito. Just saying… Other than the character designs, the overall feel of the art style is colourful but light (in terms of colour hues) that some scenes the backgrounds look like sketches. But with our focus on the cute lolis, I guess it won’t matter much.

In the voice acting department, I want to point out Rika Nagae as Hinata (Olivia in Asobi Asobase). There is a mixture of extreme cuteness and annoyance when hearing her voice. Especially when she spams and calls out “Mya-nee, Mya-nee~”. She’s like the cutest thing ever in this voice mode but also irritating since her character is an onee-sama lover-cum-retard. I thought it was Ami Koshimizu voicing Miyako but it is actually Reina Ueda (Ayado in 3D Kanojo Real Girl). Once again I am fooled with Reina Ueda’s voice sounding like Ami Koshimizu since the first time was in 3D Kanojo Real Girl. Is she going to be an occurring gaffe for me until I manage to distinguish their voice just like I did for Mamiko Noto and Saori Hayami? By the way, Ami Koshimizu did have a role here and as Miyako’s mom. The only other recognizable seiyuu is Aki Toyosaki as Noa’s mom. I guess she is ‘old’ enough and ‘not famous anymore’ to helm such roles. The other casts are Maria Sashide as Hana (debut role), Akari Kito as Noa (Misa in Ramen Daisuki Koizumi-san), Naomi Oozora as Kanon (Satania in Gabriel Dropout), Hitomi Oowada as Koyori (Ayano in Hanebado), Lynn as Matsumoto (Yuu in Akanesasu Shoujo) and Hina Kino as Yuu (Sayaka in Toji No Miko).

The opening and ending themes are all sung by Wataten Five. Basically the quintet of Hana, Hinata, Noa, Kanon and Koyori. Kimama Na Tenshitachi isn’t anything special. Typical cute, lively, upbeat anime pop sung with exuberance in accordance to their loli characters that suits the loli theme of the series like the glove. If you have heard opening themes of the same genre like Sansha Sanyou, Comic Girls and Slow Start, you’ll have a pretty good idea how generic this song sounds like. It is the same feel for the ending theme, Happy Happy Friends but this time with some added fanfare and a bit sounding like Broadway.

Overall… Everything is just so cute, cute, CUTE!!!! Oh so kawaii!!! Oh so adorable!!! Oh so lovely!!! At this point you may be asking yourself what you are doing in life since you are watching this piece of loli yuri entertainment. Or just enjoy the simple, funny and straightforward antics. Don’t worry. This series won’t be the last of its kind and there will be many more of such genres in the coming future. It’s the only way that full grown adult men can legally love their lolicons forever. Thanks Japan, for bringing and enriching us such lovely angels into our lives.

Uchi No Maid Ga Uzasugiru

February 17, 2019

Heh. First they tried giving me a boy maid. Thankfully I didn’t turn into a shotacon. And then there was that busty dragon maid. Thank goodness I didn’t convert into some furry fetish. And now we have a lolicon maid! Oh… Uhm… Well… Okay, good thing I am confident I won’t turn into a lolicon but will I be turned on by a maid who is into little girls? What the heck am I saying?! Anyway, in Uchi No Maid Ga Uzasugiru, the maid of the main character is such an annoyance since she loves little girls. Hence the daily shenanigans and struggles of their odd relationship. Loli harassment! I hope this anime won’t make lolicons hate maids!

Episode 1
Tsubame Kamoi is out of luck. There is no job offer where she gets to spend the whole day with a little girl. She returns to the house where she spotted her ‘snow angel’ 1.5 years ago. Yeah, there was this cute half Russian girl, Misha Takanashi that caught her heart. But now the place looks unkempt and there is an ad outside hiring for a maid. Part of the requirements is to be tough and strong so she fears a bratty little fat kid. To make sure, she climbs up to pole to peek into the room. There’s that little girl Misha! Misha is so freaked out, she ran to her dad, Yasuhiro for help! Dad is so happy his daughter came for help and wants to celebrate! Tsubame is ushered in and already Misha is feeling the creeps. After Yasuhiro’s wife died, the place became messy as she did the cleaning and laundry. He can’t be at home always, he needs someone to take care of the place. As Misha is known to play pranks on maids, they don’t last long. Misha pours muddy water over Tsubame in hopes to kick her out but she is unfazed. This is nothing to her. You see, Tsubame is from the military and ex-JSDF! Instantly she sizes up Misha’s measurements and freaks her out to hide behind her dad again. Misha thinks there is no way to beat her after seeing her killer abs! OMFG!!! But the annoyance level increases when Tsubame wears her school gym clothes since there are none available. Dad is so happy to see them getting on together so well.

Next day, Tsubame returns wearing a real maid outfit. She doesn’t mind the stares of the neighbourhood as long as she get to be with the loli. In order to dig up dirt on Tsubame, Misha uses her pet ferret, Kumagoro to film her. Looks like she is going to put her panties on her head. Nothing happens. In fact, Tsubame knows about the recording and says hi. I don’t think there will be any searches in Google to kill someone easily without anybody finding out. Later Tsubame wants to eat lunch with Misha but she won’t come out of her room. So she fans the delicious curry in her bid to get her out. Misha is tempted but tells her to leave it at the doorstep. Once the coast is clear, she opens the door. Don’t look up now because she’s hiding on the ceiling! Caught the loli! Misha becomes upset thinking Tsubame only likes her because of her looks. This makes her no different than everyone else. However Tsubame assures she only likes girls who have not menstruated! As she brags about her preference of angels who can’t reproduce yet, Misha quietly takes the curry into her room and locks the door. Remember to draw the curtains too so that pervert maid can’t see you eating from outside the pole. With summer vacation here, Tsubame thinks Misha has no friends and needs to provide a healthy and happy life. Thus the next day she arrives in a school gym outfit with the logic she needs friends her own age (at the expense of the neighbourhood giving her that trashy look). Tsubame wants to know more about Misha but the feeling is not mutual for the loli. Here’s to more annoying days ahead. Papa can’t be so happy to see them ‘happy’ together like this. So touching…

Episode 2
Tsubame’s attempts to be friends with Misha so far… Failed! But she notices Misha loves playing an online game and hatches a scheme to create a fake account and pretend to be her friend. She imagines Misha will be shocked to learn the friend is her all along and they’ll become real friends. If only real life was this easy. Creating a new avatar under the name Kinue, she makes a friend request thinking there aren’t many ferret lovers in this town. Yeah, 65 friend requests and all of them filthy male lolicons! Look who’s talking?! Finally the real Misha shows up and accepts her friend request. Meeting up in the game, Tsubame’s avatar is a cute little girl but Misha an old rough and tough guy? Better to stem those weird invitations (but she’s still getting them, though). Both play the game well. Tsubame notices Misha taking pictures of Kumagoro as she needs to send them to her friend Kinue. Tsubame is delighted in hearing that but can’t reveal her identity. For now, she leaves the house without harassing Misha but this only makes her suspicious. Next time they log online and clear a very difficult game, Tsubame accidentally calls to Misha. This only ascertains Misha’s suspicions that Kinue is Tsubame. Immediately she logs out. Game over.

Misha wakes up only to find herself being carried by Tsubame to the forests. They’re going to camp together?! This is the worst. This is to make up for that online game incident and also she is hoping Misha will get that Stockholm Syndrome. A lot of campers thought they were like mother and daughter but of course this brings back some unpleasant memories for Misha as she scoffs off Tsubame as her mom. She agrees and creepily describes all her different Caucasian features. Since Misha can’t go home alone or she’ll get lost, looks like she’ll have to camp for the night and also help cook food (because she thinks Tsubame will kill her if she doesn’t cooperate). Their food taste good but of course Misha won’t admit it. Tsubame seeks forgiveness for that online game incident and won’t leave the mountain until she is forgiven! Instant forgiveness! That night she can’t sleep so she is bored and looks at the stars, only to remember mom’s last words that she will be one and be sure to look for her. Problem is, too many stars! Not sure which is hers. Time is right for Tsubame to invite her to sleep inside where it is warm. Warm indeed but Tsubame can’t stop sleep talking about turning Misha into a cute girl! However just when it gets interesting (Tsubame talking about how her father died around Misha’s age and that’s when she wanted to fly), sleep Misha falls asleep. Misha finally returns home and because she so happily describes the fun she did during camping, Yasuhiro points out the obvious only to make Misha embarrassed. So it’s fun or not?

Episode 3
Tsubame is tempted by other young girls. But her heart must stay strong to only Misha! Then she realizes, is Misha not going to school? After luring her out of her room with ice cream, she asks about school. Russians don’t need to go to school! Local law exemption? She plays dumb and later asks Yasuhiro. Because of her looks, she attracts attention. Yasuhiro blames himself for putting Misha through this. She told her if she be a good girl at school, mom will recover but did not. So he left her alone and hopes she’ll get over this. Tsubame will go to school with her and be the centre of attraction but she’ll get arrested in no time. So she goes talk to Misha again and of course another no. Hence Tsubame gives an example of a different looking kid in one’s class. It is sure to attract attention. You can only judge someone by their appearance before you get to know them. Tsubame then goes on to rant how she knows Misha a lot by how much toilet paper she uses! And with more other habits of Misha she observes, Misha decides to go to school! Just to avoid being with this annoying person! Man, if this was reverse psychology, it worked like a charm.

Yasuhiro must be so proud that his daughter finally decides to take her first step to school. Only, if Tsubame isn’t there waiting to go with her. Trying to pretend to be a girl sick for 3 years and is now resuming school? Nobody’s going to buy that. Misha goes off alone and meets up with her classmate, Mimika Washizaki. It seems there is a problem in class. Both were supposed to take care of the hamster. During the holidays, the teacher decided to put both hamsters in a cage so as to only clean 1 cage. Now it has multiplied! Meanwhile Tsubame remembers a room that Yasuhiro told her not to enter. It is an important room to Misha and it is believed it contains her late mom’s belongings. So for that day for Misha to open her heart and show her that room, she prepares a surprise back to school party at home. Once she is done, she decides to check on Misha at school. After sneaking and breaking in, outside her class she peeks and sees Misha and Mimika taking control of the situation as they address the hamster problem. Wow. She’s a hamster pro. Tsubame is so impressed but too bad she is arrested by the police. Misha returns home, shocked at the party bash. But Yasuhiro is heard over the phone apologizing. You know what the maid has done, right? Too bad, instead of spending time with Misha in this party, she has to fix up the school. At least the parts she broke into. Apologizing can only get you so far…

Episode 4
Misha keeps 3 of the hamsters. Noticing Yasuhiro will be working overnight and Tsubame doesn’t come over during weekends, it’s freedom! Too bad here is the maid. Yasuhiro called her to come. This means she’s going to stay for the night. Oh no. She’ll protect her from any evil! Says the one who is most evil! Tsubame is tempted to bath with Misha but decides not to. She thinks that if she does this often, Misha will feel lonely and eventually invite her into the bath. Not happening. Just get out! When she goes to bed, Misha is shocked to see Tsubame already waiting in her bed. Misha was so engrossed in her games that she didn’t notice her sneaking in. Kicked out of course. Next morning, Misha wakes up and plays her games for the entire day. When she is about to retire to bed, she realizes she forgot to do her homework. Hence Tsubame helps out by interviewing her about her future dreams. As she wants the easy life, why not marry someone rich? Tsubame offers herself because she has a bit of money. It’s not from her maid job but her side job of making doll clothes. That fetches a lot on the internet. Misha is not impressed. She wants to have a peaceful life without her around. Tsubame doesn’t get it and believes the harder the mission, the better the reward. But Tsubame has money, why does she need to work? Nothing is much better than taking care of a Russian girl and she is also fulfilled doing her hobby. Misha now knows what to write. So we see her read her dreams in class. She loves animals and wants to do a job relates to it. But she’ll consider the financial rewards and ways to increase her assets so she can get a high security house to keep a certain maid out. Such a realist. Later Misha looks up the internet for the doll dress. One is named after her. Better not go any further…

Misha is ecstatic when Mimika wants to come over to play. So happy that Misha forgot and only realized there is this perverted maid waiting for her. She foresees that either Tsubame will harass her to death or kill her to protect her oujo-sama. Bad ending either way. However Mimika is already here and shockingly Tsubame puts up the most courteous and polite maid act ever. Is this really her? Mimika learns that Misha can talk to animals. Misha thought others would find it weird but Mimika is impressed. Finally Tsubame’s true colours are revealed when she wants Mimika to put on a cute dress. Surprisingly she agrees. Because of her brothers keep messing her up (nothing hentai!), she can’t afford to wear cute dresses. Mimika laments she doesn’t have nice blonde hair but Misha prefers black hair. The case of the grass is greener? Conversation interrupted with Tsubame almost ‘dying’ from the young girls’ conversation. Tsubame lends a pair of decorative glasses for Mimika to complement her dress. As Mimika leaves, she thanks Misha and her maid because before today, she never liked her hair and glasses. Misha is glad Mimika calls her by her name. It’s like she achieved a friend, no? So her special nickname for her is Washiwashi? Misha also starts taking better care of her hair.

Episode 5
Yui Morikawa thinks she is the cutest in class. That is of course until Misha turns up. Oh dear. We’ve got a jealous loli on our hands. Hence she walks around a popular street in hopes of getting her picture taken by a famous children magazine. Too bad they asked Misha instead. And Misha turned them down! That’s it for Yui. She challenges Misha to a cute contest. I guess Misha can’t say no. It gets worse with Tsubame agreeing. Yui lays down the rules. They should spend the money they have to accessorize themselves. Mimika will judge who will be the cutest. So Yui’s 512 Yen is going up against Misha’s 12,000 Yen?! Well, Yui already has a head start considering she is already dressed quiet fashionable. Even with all that money, Misha’s poor taste in fashion is so poor… Thank goodness for her maid and friend. In the end, Misha chose something simple and Mimika points her as the winner. Yui won’t accept this so Tsubame takes the liberty to strip Yui! Has she finally turned into a criminal? Actually, Yui overdressed so it is hard to focus what is cute on her. With more fashion tips from Tsubame about more is less, Yui now considers Tsubame her master! Yui is then scouted by the magazine for her picture. Happy Yui posts it online and as usual, an uncle who always posts first comments on getting a low angle view. She doesn’t understand so Tsubame brutally explains what it means. Immediately she blocks that pedo. A few days later, that uncle is seen arrested on the news. Misha hopes the same would befall on Tsubame.

Misha’s school is having its sports day. Yasuhiro and Tsubame are here to watch. Initially Misha gave Tsubame the green light to come as long as she doesn’t stand out or say anything. Too bad that won’t last long because bad luck falls on Yui as she sprains her ankle. It’s like God don’t want the class ace to race. Yui requests for her master to replace her and with Misha feeling pressured by everyone, here comes Tsubame to the rescue. Really? They accept an adult to replace a kid?! We can see Tsubame is so efficient in the ball toss that the other teammates don’t need to do anything. Naturally the opposite complains of unfairness and wants a handicap. Yeah, even tying her hand behind her back, Tsubame still aces the tug of war and relay! Finally it is the 3-legged race. Misha is doomed because if Yui was supposed to be her partner… However Tsubame matches her pace to run at Misha’s speed. But Misha knows at this rate she will lose and wants Tsubame to do her best. However Tsubame would prefer to match her pace and run to the finish line together, something that is harder to do. Misha doesn’t care about anything but winning but luck is on her side as other teams tumble and they end up in third place. In the end, somehow the opposite team win the overall. Can’t say Misha’s side cheated now? But Misha notes the need to work on her stamina. But first, she has to get over her dad and maid fawning over the recorded video of Misha in action. Needing to upgrade the TV to 8K just to watch Misha in HD? Don’t waste money!

Episode 6
If there is anything Misha doesn’t need, it’s meeting another weirdo. Unfortunately for this goth loli weirdo, Midori Ukai, Misha blows her whistle and soon the police comes chasing this molester. While escaping, she kidnaps Mimika but she too has a whistle. Thank goodness for Japan keeping their lolis safe! Out of the frying pan and into the fire is what best describes Misha. Yeah, another weirdo waiting at home. As she tries to Google ways to get rid of her, she thought Tsubame is once again peeping from outside her window. Nope. Midori. From what she says, it looks like Midori is infatuated with Tsubame although the feeling is not mutual. She goes away after being threatened. Misha learns Midori is Tsubame’s former senior officer in JSDF. If Misha can think if JSDF is full of perverts, JSDF better start cleaning up their act. But Misha hits upon an idea. She thinks of using Midori to get rid of Tsubame. Misha thought her food bait was silly (since Midori craved for Tsubame’s cooking) but it worked! Misha tries to hear her out but too bad her loli brain can’t understand this ‘complexity’. You see, Midori falls on and off in between depression and ecstasy just thinking about Tsubame. Oh, time for flashback. When Midori was in the JSDF, she was working under the division to train dogs. It took years for her to get closer and bond with the canines but one day Tsubame as the new staff appeared, all the dogs suddenly obey her! Midori felt insulted but at the same time started to fall in love with Tsubame! And so this is where he one-sided love story began. Worse, Midori tries to act like a dog! Is she trying to be her b*tch? Anyway, Tsubame wasn’t impressed. As they take judo training too, Midori always set up for Tsubame to throw her down. Best feeling ever.

One day all that stopped when Tsubame suddenly quit. Desperate Midori confessed to her but was rejected. Midori was ecstatic of the rejection? Long story short, Midori is a masochist. So it was somewhat conflicting that after Tsubame left, the hole in her heart was both exciting and depressing. Yeah, Midori fell down the pecking order so low that even her training dogs rank higher than her! Considering Midori is now unemployed, how will she get money? Guess what? Midori’s family is filthy rich! Woah. Misha now feeling she wants to be a responsible adult and have a proper job than lazing around all day playing video games! This is when Misha tells Midori her plan. She wants Tsubame out of her house and since their goals align, they’ll work together. She is going to hire her as her maid. Somehow Misha kept her maid outfit in the garbage bin? Or was it a lucky find? She tries to change in public as Misha stops her and warns about being arrested. Midori complains about how uptight Japanese police are. More flashbacks as we see Midori molesting a young girl whom she thinks would be Tsubame’s taste. Yeah, the police arrested her. And now too because she got wardrobe malfunction and hence indecent exposure. I don’t know how all that worked out but Misha brings Midori back home and tells Tsubame straight in her face that she is fired. Midori is her replacement.

Episode 7
Surprisingly, Tsubame accepts it and leaves. Woah. Is Misha feeling guilty that she’s the bad guy now? Reminder: Labour law says you have to give 1 month notice for fired employees! Misha tries to look on the bright side that the annoyance is gone. But with Midori making dinner for her, WTF is this vomit induced curry?! Looks bad. Tastes bad! It doesn’t help that Midori is a masochist and loves Misha’s reprimanding. So masochistic that she eats the curry too! I guess it’s the same for breakfast. Watch how the toast gets burnt and then eating it. She really is bad at cooking for a purpose, huh? She might not be a great cook but at least she is a great cleaner. So for food, Midori solves the problem by ordering take-outs. Misha is all happy at first but when you have pizza and sushi every day, she’s starting to feel tired and wants to go back to the ordinary food. One evening, she spots Midori looking pretty anxious. That’s because she spotted Tsubame alone at the river. Can’t go to talk to her? Somehow Midori accidentally pushes Misha towards Tsubame. Awkward. Misha tries to sound that it’s not her fault but Tsubame tells her straight up that she rejected her and is not wanted in her life. That’s all to it. Misha then pleads to her she wants her to make dinner and snacks again. But she didn’t see this coming. Tsubame recorded that on her drone! She knew Midori sucks at cooking and waited for this opportunity to spring. Sneaky! Looks like Tsubame is rehired. But what about Midori? Can’t fire her without 1 month notice. And so we have 2 maids now working at her place at least for 1 month.

We see the maids making breakfast for their masters and it is Tsubame’s intention to watch Misha’s sleeping face and then wake her up. Too bad Misha is already up because she got used to how freaky it was and to avoid all that she now wakes up earlier. Tsubame tells Midori that cleaning Misha’s room is a task only for her. That is because she wants to pick every strand of Misha’s hair and make it into a replica doll for her birthday present. Wow. Her grand delusion sure thinks she could make Misha marry her. Too bad Midori asks the same question if she made a doll out of Tsubame’s hair. She’ll immediately reject it! Ah, she loves the rejection. Midori has went far to dress as frilly as Tsubame likes. In the process, trying to figure it out was also fun. Is it a good thing or bad when Tsubame says outright that she isn’t her type so no matter what dress she puts on, it’ll not attract her. Maybe a both. Midori loves the rejection and at the same time Tsubame trying to make her feel better. Later the duo put on a disguise to go stalk Misha coming back from home. Misha doesn’t have a clue this old lady is Tsubame. She also pretends to be hard on hearing if Misha happens to talk to her. At the end of the day as the maids part, looks like it is going to take a while as Midori is saying goodbye to Tsubame every few seconds. Misha realizes as long as she is dependent on Tsubame for food, she can’t get rid of her. If only she has a weakness. Is there?!

Episode 8
Misha learns that Midori’s family runs a super famous hotel. Because they call her back, Misha wants to go stay there! With the maids begging Yasuhiro, too bad father will be the only one who has to stay back at home. Misha is awed with the luxurious suite. But why a tent here? Midori’s going to stay here. She relates how she pukes at nice things and wonders if she was switched at birth. Hence her parents got fed up and had another son who will become their heir to take over the business, allowing Midori to do whatever she wants. Misha settles the sleeping problem with Midori sleeping in the middle and Tsubame next to her. If Tsubame tries to cross over to rape Misha, she’ll kill her. Can she? Next morning, Misha gets a shock awakening with Midori bleeding all over! That’s the side effect of being too long in something nice and comfortable. Misha insists that Midori joins them for breakfast and all the other attractions this hotel has. Soon reality hits as Misha realizes Midori’s one month is up and she is still looking for a job (something that abuses her and with low pay – there are so many jobs in the world that fit that). She would love Midori to stay but Yasuhiro can only keep one. Misha has no qualms suggesting Tsubame marry Midori as she pities the latter. Tsubame refuses and would prefer to marry Misha instead. Rejected. Because Misha doesn’t like her one bit! So it’s okay for Midori but not for Tsubame? Yeah, double standards. In the end, Midori faces reality and leaves. Misha is a sad girl. Tsubame is an envious girl. Because Midori pets Misha’s head as goodbye. A week later, Misha continues to worry about Midori. Jealous Tsubame believes she is fine. Suddenly Midori rings at their doorbell. Apparently she bought the house next door. She tried to waste her parents’ money in some forex investment but it brought her more returns instead. So she bought a house and started her own cleaning business since she is good at it. She also means cleaning up houses with people who died in it…

Horror for Tsubame! Because she realizes Misha’s pantsu is missing! Yeah, she knows all of Misha’s pantsu well. Immediately Misha and Midori suspect her and threaten to call the police. Yeah, they’re not going to believe her she isn’t the culprit. I’m sure Tsubame would have wanted to say if she was the culprit, why would she have alerted them but they don’t listen and deduce this obvious fact on their own. Misha learns from Tsubame’s dirty trick as she records a line that makes Tsubame seemingly admit she is the criminal although it was just part of a sentence. Tsubame goes to clear her name by investigating the crime site. All the fingerprints are hers. Get ready to call the cops on her. After amazingly describes what panty thieves do, Tsubame now remembers what happened. As she was hanging out the clothes, a delivery rang at the door. Tsubame put Misha’s panties into her pocket to go answer the door before forgetting all about it. Now you can call the police. Later, more horror for Tsubame! Because now her own pantsu is missing. After taking a bath, she comes out to find them missing. Midori would be the suspect but Tsubame knows her well enough not to do that because she gets her kicks by wearing the same kind as hers. The degrading makes her happy. I guess the rest aren’t going to take her missing panties seriously because Midori is willing to lend hers while Misha suggests wearing Yasuhiro’s if she is so damn shy in going home without one. The real culprit turns out to be the hamsters. Did they steal it for nesting?

Episode 9
Misha calls Kumagoro. Because it’s time to go to the vet doctor! Fearing the needle, Kumagoro escapes. When Misha cannot find the ferret, she ‘interrogates’ the hamsters. Misha starts to panic. Yeah, it’s a big deal for her. Thank goodness Tsubame is here to help but her efforts are not appreciated. You can’t trust a lolicon with an ulterior motive. Misha calls Mimika to help put up lost posters of Kumagoro. Searching for it in the streets is futile as Misha remembers the day her mom died, she felt alone. Yasuhiro then bought her a pet ferret and it became part of her family. Tsubame relies on her last resort for the search. As Midori keeps a retired police dog at her place, Misha lets it sniff Kumagoro’s scent. Naturally it sniffs back to her house. Tsubame had to show her authority to the playful dog to make it do its job. Eventually it leads them to Yui’s house. Misha thinks Yui kidnapped Kumagoro but Yui is cocksure she did not and dares them to go look into her house. Isn’t that Kumagoro with her little sister, Yuina? Misha wants Kumagoro back but Yuina insists she found it and is hers. Tsubame would love to add another loli to her harem and even a small girl like her understands the implications of how scary this woman is. She gives back Kumagoro and apologize. All is well, ends well. Except that they’re going to the vet now. Ferret horror continues…

It’s such a cold day and Misha didn’t want to get out of bed and even thinks school is cancelled due to the snow. Oh well. Reality sucks. Off you go. She meets up with Mimika and sees her a little fat. She admits she was eating a lot of chocolates otherwise her brothers would eat them. Yui is trying to show off her winter fashion when Misha enters the class and now all eyes are on her. Instinctively Yui challenges her to a snowball fight. Normally there is no reason for them to accept except Mimika wants to lose weight. So the rule is whoever lands the most snowballs in 10 minutes wins. Their other friends will judge. At first, Yui seems to be leading as she is pro in making and throwing snowballs. Luckily or not, Tsubame disguised as a snowman give some hints in splitting their role as well as how to make harder snowball. Now that the tables are turned on Yui, she is calling it unfair? Wasn’t she the one who set the rules? Oh, her friends already gave up judging quite a while ago. So can we call it a tie? Because if they really kept count, Yui would have lost. Grrr… Oh Yui, just “Let It Go”! Haha! Misha thanks Mimika and this pure friendship moments is ruined because a certain lolicon sees it as some beautiful loli yuri. Time to bust the maid out of the snow.

Episode 10
Yasuhiro wants to go on a vacation with Misha to the hotspring. Too bad loli prefers to stay home. Is she implying she prefers to be with the maid? Until Yasuhiro mentions the hotspring has capybara. Instantly Misha wants to go and this means she doesn’t have to see Tsubame. Now she relishes not seeing her face? Hence Misha doesn’t want father to tell Tsubame about this as she delicately plans how to go on this trip without raising Tsubame’s suspicions. All seems clear along the way until they reach the inn. Because Tsubame will be their matron! Oh sh*t! Feel like going home? But we just got here? Tsubame claims she was looking for some part time job but actually her spying on Misha is what got her to know about this. Misha can’t enjoy the bath alone since Tsubame is always there. Annoyed, she goes to pet the capybaras. Suddenly she sees a panda. A panda? In Japan? She tells Yasuhiro about it but he doesn’t believe. Hence that night Misha thought of going to get some evidence when Yasuhiro is asleep. Too bad she forgot to take her handphone and is lost. When Yasuhiro wakes up and realizes Misha is not around, time to hit the panic button. Oddly, stalker Tsubame wasn’t anywhere near Misha? Anyway she offers to go find her and wants the guilt ridden father to stay behind so as to welcome Misha back. It would be bad if he comes along and something happens to him. Because he is Misha’s only parent left. Sometimes she says some sensible stuffs. But most of the other times, just disgusting…

Misha thinks she will die in the wild. On the bright side, she can meet her mom. On the downside, she’ll miss all her family and friends. However thinking about Tsubame means death is much preferable! Suddenly Misha sees the panda. Strange, it is walking bipedal and eating fish raw? Pandas eat fish?! Misha thinks it is a brown bear in disguise. Don’t look now but big mama brown bear is here! Is Misha done for? Good thing or not, Tsubame is here to save the day. How can she even take advantage of this situation to hug Misha? So is she going to fight the bear? Well, she starts ranting how much she loves Misha. The bear just walks away! Even animals know not to mess with this psycho. While Misha is now safe, she is now keeping her distance with this pervert. When other rescue workers come, Misha gladly goes to them. They return to the inn as Yasuhiro lectures her but it is a pretty mild scolding. Misha regrets what she does as they apologize to the staffs. At least Misha shows a bit of compassion to Tsubame but she’s pushing her luck of asking her hand in marriage. Will papa approve? Yasuhiro is a bit overprotective of Misha now. He wouldn’t really know what to do had she been lost and he can’t go save her like Tsubame. He hopes she would properly call him daddy one day.

Episode 11
Flashback of the happier times Misha and her mom. Wow. So touching. Misha is happy that Mimika is coming over for a sleepover. Of course she is not impressed with Tsubame taking the initiative to set up all the elaborate stuffs. All she needs to do is make delicious snacks for them. I guess that will do. As Tsubame cleans up, there is a room that she was forbidden to enter, she wants to clean it. Immediately Misha shoots her down. Don’t ever enter that room. That room is actually Misha’s mom’s work station and it holds a lot of memories for her. Later Misha thinks of cleaning it as it is obviously dusty and dirty. Looking at the Herculean effort needed to clean, I guess she’ll postpone it to another time. When Mimika arrives, why is Yui here too? Apparently Mimika bumped into her along the way (fighting with a cat?!) and thinks Yui wants to be her friend. Misha invites her to stay over. As the girls have fun, Misha orders Tsubame to sleep outside to guard them from weirdoes. You mean like this one peeking at the edge of the house and almost being arrested by the police? Yup. Girls, meet Midori. I guess she’s joining them too? As the lolis bath, Misha can’t let her guard down and anticipates Tsubame barging in. None of that happened. Surprised, huh? Since Tsubame saved her in the woods, Misha relents and wears the pyjamas Tsubame made for her. Tsubame could die now but if she did, she won’t get to stalk enjoy further loli time. As Misha is preoccupied thinking about Tsubame because she is strangely nice today, her friends think she is a tsundere for her maid. She denies. Proven their point? Then it turns into a pillow fight. Ah, such fun.

Deep in the night as Yui needs to go to the toilet, she takes Mimika with her. WTF they witnessed Midori trying to it upside down on the toilet seat???!!! Surely scared the hell out of them. Then they see Kumagoro juggling the hamsters. In the darkness I guess it looks scary so they unwittingly hide themselves in the forbidden room. Accidentally they trip over some stuffs and though Misha’s mom’s stuffed bad was a monster and ran out. The duo slept the entire night huddling each other. Misha thought they were close friends. As Misha goes down, she sees the forbidden room’s door open. At that time Tsubame just came back. Misha becomes visibly upset about somebody entering the room. She suspects Yui since she was curious about that room yesterday. Immediately Tsubame covers for her and says that it was her who enter the room. This makes Misha even madder, telling her off this is a place for her family and not for any outsider to enter. She locks herself in that room.

Episode 12
Mimika and Yui realize their mistake and want to apologize. However Midori tells them not to waste Tsubame’s efforts. After they leave, Yasuhiro rushes home. Although Tsubame apologizes, Yasuhiro blames himself for not being a good father. So it’s time to confirm why Misha is so fixated with that room. As you would have known, it is her mother’s studio. Sometimes Misha always finds her way there to play with mom. You can say there are a lot of dear memories of mom there. After mom died, she stayed there for a while thinking mom was hiding somewhere. With that, Tsubame yells from outside the room to make Misha realize that her mom is not in that room. Of course it only serves to make her mad. Later Mimika and Yui call Misha to apologize. Misha also knows. Even if Tsubame always makes her mad, she would never do anything to hurt her. Midori enters the room via ventilation. Technically not inside the room? She gives her food and portable potty and says Tsubame is currently cleaning the house. When Tsubame is done with the task, Midori confronts her about Tsubame’s u-turn attitude of thinking she can no longer be with Misha. She scolds her if her love for Misha is that thin. Please think again what is the most important in the world to her.

Soon Tsubame talks to Misha but remains outside the room. She explains her past. Her father was in the JSDF and because he always bought her macho and toys for boys, it’s the reason why she ended up loving girly and frilly things. Despite all that, she loves her papa dearly. So when his death was sudden, she was in shock. Her mom probably couldn’t bear to see her like this and told a white lie that he went to the skies. It is the same reason Tsubame went into JSDF so she could see him in the sky. She trained hard for that day and when she finally took off to the skies, of course she already knew, he wasn’t anywhere. Misha admits that she wasn’t mad with anybody who entered the room. It is the fact that she didn’t feel anything when she entered. It means she had fun every day without her mom. It’s like she has forgotten about her. That is why she is mad with herself. Tsubame continues that she was forced to quit the JSDF because of her failing eyesight. Her right is now completely blind. Misha feels bad she lost everything but on the contrary, Tsubame found her light: It’s you Misha! With Misha making peace with herself, she opens the door to bring Tsubame in so they could clean the room together. In the aftermath, everything returns to normal. This includes Misha still not calling Yasuhiro her dad, Yui challenging Misha to a challenge she already lost before (did she forget?), Midori back to her creepy masochistic ways and yes, Tsubame still not giving up on marrying Misha and even have her babies! If she doesn’t, she’ll hold her dinner hostage! WTF?!

Devious Maids
I guess life is not perfect and definitely not a bed of roses. For Misha to continue accepting Tsubame as her maid shows that she clearly values her a lot and is willing to put up with her annoying habits and constant harassing and pestering for years to come. It’s the small price to pay for having her delicious cooking and snacks. Oh Misha, don’t rush into answering Tsubame’s questions (although I know what your answers already are). You’ve still got a lot of years ahead of you so take your time and enjoy your childhood and don’t let the lolicon spoil it all.

Depending on how you find your comedy, Tsubame’s antics level are at annoyance level or at funny level. While this series doesn’t spam in your face Tsubame’s loli love antics, it does enough to make you laugh. After all, that is what the series is going to be mostly about. If the entire series is going to have Tsubame trying to fulfil her sick fetish and without some character building moments, I think it would be very distasteful and we would be just freaked out. It is like the lolicon version of the Road Runner and Coyote Show. You know that cartoon that has a certain coyote nonstop trying to get his hands on a certain road runner in every skit. That is basically what that series and cartoon is all about. So thankfully although there are some really ‘freaky’ moments when Tsubame goes overboard with her loli love (do you not find her delusions of Misha to be very disturbing on an uncomfortable and unhealthy level?), I find them amusing and hilarious to watch. After all, how can you not love a maid character!!!!!!!!! See the light today, people!!!! Maid characters are the best!!!! Always!!!! Wohoo!!!! Ahem. Now I understand how Misha feels…

I know some of the comedy effects are exaggerated but there is one thing that boggled my mind. It is that panda incident. I kept thinking there was some sort of motive behind it. After all, you don’t find pandas other than in mainland China. It was even walking in a bipedal fashion and eats raw fish it caught from the river. So I thought it had to be somebody in a panda suit. Perhaps Midori. And then nothing came out of it. So what the heck was all that? Therefore this ridiculous moment was just some rushed plot convenience so that Misha will open her heart a little and learn her lesson. Don’t always be a brat to Yasuhiro and Tsubame because technically when she’s in trouble, they are the only ones capable of protecting her.

Love her or hate her, is Tsubame a blessing in Misha’s life or is she a curse? Or both? It is indeed sad that Misha lost her beloved mom at a very young age and I am not even sure what happened to her real biological father. I am assuming mom remarried Yasuhiro because it would be really strange and rude for Misha to call her father by his name. It’s not that Misha really likes him and at first it feels like he only does so because he is the only one left she can rely on. All Misha wants is a family and it is unfortunate she can’t have her real mom with her anymore so everyone else like Yasuhiro, her pets, her friends and to an extend her annoying maid helps her fill that void and hopefully in time to come, Misha would be able to see Yasuhiro as her father. Yup, what Misha needs isn’t a maid. It’s a family.

Even though Misha dislikes Tsubame, it is not like she entirely hates her. That part where she was temporarily fired proved it. Even if Misha only likes Tsubame for her delicious cooking, at least there is a part of her she likes. There are certain points where Misha ponders over Tsubame’s history and it’s a sign that she cares, right? Over the course of the series you can see how Misha has ‘transformed’ from a girl who freaks out at the sight of Tsubame to one who just doesn’t bother anymore. Like as though she has learnt to counter this sicko by not giving in and overreacting because it seems that it was Tsubame wants. So she just makes sarcastic comebacks and enough to ignore the annoying maid that it makes her feeling confused and snubbed. That’s the way to play this game. You adapt. If you can’t beat ‘em, ignore ‘em. If the logic of Tsubame being persistent with her will make Misha finally give in, then the same logic would also apply to Misha if she constantly rejects her, Tsubame will give up and go away. The question is who will prevail first? It would have been super uncomfortable if Misha and Tsubame really gone down the yuri path (even if it was for reverse psychology). Adult woman and a loli seem like a very sick hentai genre. Thank goodness the rejection force in Misha is strong!

It’s a running joke that Tsubame is a lolicon and hence this peculiar character of hers that give rise to a lot of questionable situations and things she does. But don’t worry, since she is from the army, an excuse why she can do almost anything with ease. I don’t think I have ever seen any other women with such great abs like hers except for Shingeki No Kyojin’s Mikasa. Yeah… It is nice that we caught a glimpse and insight on Tsubame’s past. Especially about her father and why she wanted to join the JSDF. It might be short but it was impactful enough. Not really clear how it led to her lolicon behaviour but more importantly it gives Tsubame some character we can somewhat sympathize with (albeit 1% is good enough) instead of one who just an overpowered, can do anything and everything as well as an annoying lolicon. But for now, she’ll have this reputation of being a stalker trying to torment a kid in the name of love and disrespecting her privacy time. Yeah… Can you say that Tsubame’s twisted character is also because she somewhat come from a broken family? And only one with such background can help another in the same predicament? Good for Misha, she doesn’t need to learn lessons the hard way.

Even if Tsubame loves lolis and young girls who haven’t have their first period yet, boy I have bad news for you Misha. Because once you have become a teen and have your first period, Tsubame will dump you! On second thought, maybe that is what Misha wants and the only way to legitimately get rid of Tsubame. But she’ll have to wait for years. So I guess this series is a bit short sighted because when the time comes as Misha grows up, what will be of Tsubame’s love for her? Will all those sick lolicon moments turn into true love? Maybe. But for now we see Tsubame’s delusions of marrying Misha and frolicking with her as though Misha will never age. If Tsubame’s love for Misha does not transform from a lolicon to a genuine one, man she is going to be real disappointed when reality hits her since Misha will be growing up real fast when she hits puberty. Every lolicons worst nightmare when their lolis grow up. I’m also thinking that even if Tsubame doesn’t think she is harassing Misha and this obviously would scar a little girl for life, is it because she doesn’t think Misha will grow up?!

The running joke for the other sicko maid, Midori seems to be that she is a hardcore masochist. The lowest of the lowest life from. I just want to know when her status will go below a water flea. Well, technically everything in this world can be hard on you if you’re masochistic enough. So no matter how kind you are to her, she has this twisted way of twisting and misinterpreting it to some sort of punishment on her. Technically you can say that with her around, that’s why we can’t have nice things. Because she is so averse to it. So it makes me wonder that in the worst case scenario if Tsubame gives up on Misha and decides to go for mature lesbianism with her, will Midori still love Tsubame? I mean, being rejected is what gives her the pleasure. It is amazing that Midori has not tried self-mutilation but I guess that would be too much for this cute series.

Other characters feel okay. Like Yasuhiro trying hard to be Misha’s dad but he can’t be a proper one since he is always tied up with his job. I’m not sure what he does but it seems his boss might be some sort of slave driver, often making his employees coming back to work on weekends and long hours, hence Misha is often alone. Don’t want to repeat the tragedy of losing your child like a child loses her mother. But if Yasuhiro screws work, he can’t afford to let Misha live comfortably and even hire maids to take care of her. Yeah, being a single parent sucks. Maybe he should see Usagi Drop for some inspiration. Mimika feels like she is there so that Misha has another person to call a friend while Yui perhaps just wants somebody to be her true friend. That’s why she is always showing off to impress people and targeting Misha just because she thinks she has everything better just shows she has inferior complex. Competing with her feels like an exaggerated excuse just to hang out with her. She won’t admit it but I think they’re friends now, right? Last and not least, Kumagoro and the hamsters provide some animal mascot relief (animal cuteness in addition to loli cuteness) but they don’t have any significant impact on the overall story.

Art and animation are quite bright and clean. Well, Doga Kobo animated this series and they have done quite a few titles under their belt that has cute or beautiful characters such as YuruYuri, New Game, Gabriel Dropout, Love Lab, Sansha Sanyou, Mikakunin De Shinkoukei, Himouto! Umaru-chan, Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun, Plastic Memories, Luck & Logic, Mikagura Gakuen Kumikyou and even in the same season, Anima Yell. It’s no wonder why there are cute girls and cute maids aplenty. Heh. But is it me when I first saw Misha, I thought she resembled a lot like Shichisei No Subaru’s Asahi. Yeah, the cute loli looks is there. And why does Yui remind me of Mitsuba from Mitsudomoe? Yeah, that bratty attitude and very similar hairstyle. Because Tsubame has an eye-patch over an eye, I keep wondering if she took this look from Rozen Maiden’s Bara Suishou. Well, the rose pattern over the eye-patch seems pretty familiar. There is one scene I remember the animation feels weird. When Misha first saw Tsubame outside her room, she got freaked out and ran all the way to Yasuhiro. The camera angle of following a panicky Misha makes the whole thing feel odd because it’s jerky and it makes Misha look more like a comical clown the way she runs and slips. Weird.

For the voice acting, I somewhat find Shiori Izawa as Yui (Moka in Kuzu No Honkai) to sound a bit strange because she sounds like she is trying to hold back her voice in her bit to try and sound bratty. Or trying too hard that she sounds like a fake loli. Not sure if I explained that correctly. The other casts are Haruka Shiraishi as Misha (Kirie in Himouto! Umaru-chan), Manami Numakura as Tsubame (Narberal in Overlord – probably why her character sounded so familiar), Mao Ichimichi as Midori (Bada in ClassicaLoid), Sayaka Harada as Mimika (Chiya in Urara Meirocho), Masayuki Katou as Yasuhiro (Demiurge in Overlord) and Kikuko Inoue who is already at that age whereby she can sound so motherly and as Misha’s mom (I guess she is no longer always 17! Haha!).

The opening theme, Uza Uza Wows by the duet of Misha and Tsubame is a lot fun to hear. Catchy opener with Russian words (Raz Dva Tri Chetyre! One Two Three Four!) and spamming of the cute waiwaiwaiwai~ that it makes me want to sound like a broken recorder. Lots of energetic exuberance that sums up mainly the relationship of the duo. The same duo also sing the ending theme which is another interesting song to here. Tokimeki Climax may sound like a rock song fit for a morning workout and maybe it is so (the ending credits animation are mostly about the duo working out) and the banter between the duo in the lyrics is as amusing to listen as always. Zenryouku! Sou ai desu!

Overall, a cute and funny show and I love it because of my maid fetish. Not the kind of ideal maid I would like to have but still a maid so this series get a free (bias) pass and thumbs up. Those who cannot find humour in this series might write it off as some sick perverse sexual harassment of minors. But why does it not seem so serious when a female is a lolicon? Imagine if Tsubame was a man, this series would have been bombarded with brickbats. It would have been distasteful and taken off the air for trying to promote pedo culture. Despite all the uncomfortable adult things that are being done to or imagined on a minor, this series has its hilarious moments. Try not to overthink and be offended with everything, okay? If Misha can put up with the most annoying maid ever, I’m sure that you snowflakes can put up with a harmless and fun anime series.

Ryuuou No Oshigoto

July 14, 2018

If 3-gatsu No Lion was too depressing and there weren’t enough cute female shogi players, Ryuuou No Oshigoto could be that elixir to counter that. No long boring drama that wreaks of melancholy in every episode, check. No male-only dominated shogi like as though shogi is a men’s only world, check. Lots of cute females, check. Bonus points and double check if you love lolis. Oh yeah. This is going to be a fun ride, isn’t it? Wait. Is this really going to be about playing shogi or the daily hijinks of a young shogi master taking on an even younger shogi prodigy as his disciple? Why do I suddenly want my shogi to be sad and depressing?

Episode 1
Yaichi Kuzuryuu defied all odds and the intense pressure to become the youngest Ryuuou in shogi. But ever since then, it has been 3 months since he is in a slump and he needs to fix his predicament fast for the sake of the title he is holding. When he goes home, he is shocked to see a young girl, Ai Hinatsuru waiting there and wanting to fulfil his promise to take her as his disciple. During his Ryuuou title match, he was close to a breakdown when Ai gave him a glass of water to calm his nerves and that was when he made the promise. Her father owns the inn that Ryuuou match was played. Yaichi plays a match to test her aptitude. The match is intense although he still wins. Ai has been a fan of his and wants to be like him. And to think she just started playing shogi in only 3 months. Prodigy? Another match is played to test if she is worthy of becoming his disciple. They played late into the night until they realize they have forgotten to eat. Next morning she makes him breakfast and she continues to wow him with hard shogi strategies she could easily solve. Yaichi is in a dilemma to take her under his wing because his ‘sister’ might oppose to it. Speaking of which, here she is knocking on his door! She gets suspicious hearing a girl’s voice inside. At the same time, Ai turns into a yandere thinking he has another girl. Caught between a hard place and a rock. Eventually the cat is out of the bag. Ginko Sora sees Yaichi with a naked loli. Of all times, Ai must take a bath? Definitely a checkmate he won’t recover from.

Ginko hints of killing Yaichi and she isn’t joking. I know it’s natural that guys in his predicament try to explain but often in situations like this, the girl will never listen. It is always his fault somehow. Ginko isn’t Yaichi’s blood related sister. As they share the same shogi master, they are treated like siblings. Besides, Ginko is quite a famous idol in the shogi industry and is known as the Snow White of Naniwa. That queen title sounds nice but she is more of the S&M type. Ai and Ginko don’t get along well because of a certain guy. Poor guy gets caught in the middle of whatever feud they have. Ai is brought to their master’s house. He knows about Ai running away from home because the shogi association called him about a missing child. Although there are many professional shogi players in the north where she hails from, she insists on becoming Yaichi’s disciple. That single Ryuuou match must have been so inspiring, huh? Ai is now temporarily Yaichi’s disciple as she meets fellow trainee, Keika Kiyotaki. Yaichi brings Ai to the local shogi association hall to join a training group. They bump into Yaichi’s self-proclaimed rival, Ayumu Kannabe (chuunibyou dude). After he leaves her at the training hall, he goes to have his match with Ayumu.

Episode 2
During lunch break, Yaichi goes to see Ai. She too won hers. As Yaichi is famous, girls of all ages swamp over him, making Ai real jealous. Especially those who were bold enough to shake hands with him. Yaichi resumes his knight-slaying-demon-fantasy match with Ayumu. Can we credit is win to Ai ever since she popped up at his place? Is this the start of his revival? Ai is so talented that she got promoted in the same day. Not so lucky for Keika as she is already 25 years old and there is an age limit that needs one to become professional or else you retire for good. Ai asks Yaichi’s permission to host a shogi workshop at his place with her friends, Mio Mizukoshi, Ayano Sadatou and Charlotte Izoard (oh no, rival French loli character who loves to sit on Yaichi’s lap as her favourite cushion). In addition to playing each other, Yaichi also plays all of them simultaneously to see their level. Because they get so passionate in becoming better shogi players, they kiss sleep goodbye. Naturally they fall asleep along the way and more woes for Yaichi when he wakes up because Ginko is incessantly taking photos of ‘proof’ of him being a lolicon. The world shall know him of his new title, Loli King! The girls swamp Ginko but she isn’t good with kids. Somehow it is Yaichi’s fault when Charlotte gets her drool all over her skirt… Soon, Ai’s parents, Takashi and Akina come to see them. They are taking back their daughter as they don’t see a bright future for a female shogi player. Although Yaichi assures them of her talent that will no doubt make her a title holder, Akina is not convinced because Yaichi has never taken on a disciple before so what makes him so sure he can tell. Ai mentions all the nice things Yaichi does for her (why does she have to make it sound so ambiguously sexually charged?) but mom is still bent on bringing her home. Wow. Daughter calling mother stupid? Yaichi proposes this. As Ai will be taking her training group entrance exam tomorrow, she will face all 3 professional challengers of various levels. Akina wants her to win all matches because if she is that good, winning should be no problem.

Episode 3
Ai hopes Yaichi could give her some sort of charm as motivation for tomorrow’s matches. I hope this fan will do. Ai’s first opponent is Ayano whom she defeats easily. Next up is Yoshitsune Kuruno, the organizer of this training group and an active top shogi player. It took a while but eventually she beats him. Everyone is amazed at her overflowing talent. Only Akina doesn’t seem to be impressed. Ai’s final match is against Ginko. Grudge match? As explained, Ginko might be a female professional but she is not a professional shogi player. Apparently there is a difference. The league is divided into promotional league and the lower training league, each with their own tiers. To become a professional shogi player, you have to be tops of the promotional league but to become a female professional, attaining a high ranking in the training league is good enough. And there’s some other convoluted ranking and promotion system that noobs like won’t understand at first go. Ginko is a tough nut to crack. It’s like she is slowly trying to breakdown Ai’s mental state. Ai used up all her allotted time that her subsequent moves must be made in within a minute. This only serves to pressure and make her panic more, so much so she has a hard time breathing! There is one time Ai claws her way back and takes the lead but Ginko corners back using tactics that Yaichi once thought and practised with her thousands of times! Damn, seeing Ai in tears and trying to hold it in is like some sort of torture. Eventually Ginko wins (although deep inside she is frustrated she couldn’t breakthrough easily and had to draw out all she got). Akina wants Ai to say goodbye and leave but Yaichi after seeing Ai’s perseverance, now he is more motivated to make her as his disciple. Yaichi prostrates himself for this chance and Ai does the same with him. Takashi agrees to leave his daughter in his care. Akina sounds rude when she asks Yaichi how many siblings he has and his annual salary. She throws down the ultimatum that if Ai cannot become a female title holder by middle school graduation, he will marry into the Hinatsuru family and help run their family inn business. This is the risk and responsibility he must take. Either way, it sounds like a win-win situation for Ai. It might sound daunting but Yaichi is willing to risk his way of life for Ai.

Episode 4
Yaichi is called to meet a legendary shogi player, Seiichi Tsukimitsu. However due to an illness he is blinded. It seems he has a request for Yaichi to take on another disciple. The granddaughter of a business family insisted she will not take on a master unless he is some top grade. Yaichi goes to meet the family to save face. He meets Ai Yashajin. Another Ai? To avoid confusion, I’ll call her as Ai Y for now. Ai Y is bitter and disrespectful. After losing to him in a handicap match, she throws a tantrum and returns to her room. Her grandpa apologizes for her rudeness. Her parents died and she faced nothing but the shogi board. It seems her parents are shogi players and they often play with each other. Those were her happy moments. Too bad they died in an accident. Yaichi has a feeling he has seen her shogi moves somewhere. When he returns, he sees Ai being reduced to tears because Ginko showed no mercy. Wasn’t Ginko supposed to be in a title match? Yes. She beat her opponent, Ryo Tsukiyomizaka in 2 minutes! Then she rushed all the way down here to use Ai as her punching back. Ginko claims Ai is getting weaker. Maybe the workshop made her relax too much. This bolsters Yaichi’s motivation to teach Ai Y. He brings her to a shogi parlour to play with other common people. Is that a granny or grandpa she’s playing with? Tranny? Ai Y lost consecutively 5 games. When he returns home, Charlotte wants to be his disciple. Yaichi declines. Why? Because Charlotte will be his bride! WTF?! Did he just realize what he just said?! He can’t even fathom why Ai is so mad? Did he forget about that deal? All he thinks is that Ai doesn’t like the idea of another disciple and hence will not tell her about Ai Y. Oh no. I can see where this is going to lead… Yaichi continues to take Ai Y out for shogi matches on weekends and on other days he is with Ai. When Ai mentions she is now good at figuring out people’s habit, this means she now knows Yaichi is lying because he rubs his pants when he does so. When Ai’s friends speculate it is a man, Ai’s evil aura is growing! To take her mind off it, Mio suggests bringing her to a shogi dojo for a change in pace. Somehow Yaichi and Ai Y are there as he is teaching her how to move. This means touching and guiding her hand. Why do they have to come in at the precise of times? Oh sh*t…

Episode 5
Ai in yandere mode!!! Ai Y makes it worse with ambiguous words so Ai tries to compete with it. Yaichi tries to sound he is not obsessed or anything but Ai takes it the wrong way and runs away in tears. She runs away from home (again?) but is at his master’s house and staying with Keika. His master talks to Yaichi about his worries when he took him on as his disciple as he wanted to push him onto Tsukimitsu but was made to reconsider and honour Yaichi’s feelings of wanting him to be his master. He thinks Yaichi isn’t wrong as he acted with his disciple in mind. Yaichi calls Ginko after she totally crushed Tsukiyomizaka again. He tells her about another disciple he has and her defensive play looks familiar and wonders if she knows anybody who plays like that. Instead she gets mad and hangs up. When Ai Y finally wins at the shogi parlour, Yaichi signs her up for the workshop entrance exam. She easily beats the kid her age. Keika becomes her next victim. Poor Keika in tears. I guess I understand she is already at that age and not going anywhere at this rate. Ai Y’s final opponent is Ai. It makes an interesting rivalry match since both their play styles do not match up. However Ai Y is good at a very complicated move that even experts rarely use. This puts Ai at a disadvantage. In the end, Ai admits she lost. However when Kuruno and Yaichi point out a move that Ai would have easily checkmated her opponent, Ai is left crying and blaming herself for not concentrating. Her mind was preoccupied with her master and became a coward. Yaichi hopes this loss would be a lesson to her, the frustration of losing to a rival of her age. Ai Y remains cocky and won’t acknowledge anyone weaker than her but will admit Ai as her opponent. Ai is motivated once more to learn and play more from Yaichi. Yaichi remembers her defensive play. It was from her father who played a commemoration match with Tsukimitsu who was Meijin then. Although Tsukimitsu won, young Yaichi watched the match and suggested a path that none noticed. Had Ai Y’s dad realized this, he would have won. Astounded, he had high regards for Yaichi and if his daughter grows up to be a shogi player, he wants Yaichi to be her master. So Ai Y being angry at him was not remembering this. Yaichi wants her to be part of his family and her master. He promises to make her happy. Why does it sound like a proposal?! Ai is being childish asking Yaichi who is his number one. Thinking Ai was there first and hence her. Happy Ai. Ai Y thought all this is childish but she too asks the same question. This is because she is going to be part of his family. So if Ai is a yandere, Ai Y is tsundere?

Episode 6
Yaichi faces off with Jin Natagiri who is a shogi researcher and all-rounder. Because Natagiri sounds gay like as though he is flirting with him, Yaichi loses focus and lost. Again too. Yaichi is depressed but he knows this is nothing compared to Keika. She is already nearing that age limit and since she just lost another match, there’s those demotion points. Yaichi and Ai visit Mitsuru Oishi. He is an expert in using the ranging rook strategy as opposed to Yaichi who is in favour of using the static rook strategy. Yaichi gets a taste of how fearsome this strategy is with his first loss. So while under the tutelage of Oishi, they have to help clean his bath house and serve at his bar too. Yaichi is stiff from the working so Ai massages his back. Not enough, she steps on it. Heck, her loli friends also join in. Wow. They must be so light. Be he feels so damn good until a stomp on his head. Oh sh*t. Ginko not pleased. You loli pervert. I think at this rate of stomping he is going to go stupid before he dies. After so many battles, Yaichi finally wins. He is a Ryuuou title holder, you know. But what’s this? Ai crying? She tried this newly learnt strategy with a handicap on Mio and won. Mio cried like hell and it hurt Ai. Okay. Time for some comforting shogi advice as well as life’s reality. If you don’t care for those who lose, you’ll break first if you lose. If you fear victory, you don’t have to suffer. No matter who we play with, we don’t want to lose. If we can’t play shogi, our lives are meaningless. You get the point. Oishi could guess Yaichi’s goal is to fight the Meijin and he is Natagiri’s master. Does he has a chance to beat him? Maybe. On the next official match, Natagiri loses his flirting gay side to put on a serious fight. Yaichi uses the strategies his learnt but Natagiri pours cold water on it because this was the strategy he played out with his master yesterday. After years of research and deadlock, they came to a conclusion the static rook strategy wins. Yaichi thinks he is trying to break him and continues fighting. Just when Yaichi thought he checkmated him, Natagiri pulls a surprise move. Didn’t see that one coming?

Episode 7
I don’t know what Yaichi did but he looks like looking into the future or something. Because of that he pulls off a surprising move and checkmates Natagiri! So I guess his research was wrong. But the main star of this episode is Keika. We all know by now she is getting older and her dream of becoming a professional female player is slimmer by the day. A stinging criticism from Ginko that she studied researches and memorized them. So when it deviates, she panics. That is why she has grown weaker. With Keika prostrating herself to her to become her master, Ginko can’t say no. Short flashback how Keika loved shogi but had a late start in taking it seriously. She thought it would be easy but reality was opposite. Ginko’s advice to her is to have more confidence in her play and not deny her own talent. Before Keika leaves for her demotion match, she tells her father she will quit her training group that she has been stuck in for years if she fails to get consecutive wins. Her first matchup is Ai Y. Since this is her redemption match, we see Keika putting up a different performance. She uses Ai Y’s specialty move against her and wins, forcing frustrated Ai Y to utter those words that she has lost. Next is Ai. Somewhat through the game, Ai starts crying because she has been in a dilemma if she should go easy on her fellow family member. You mean it wasn’t clear? So now she is getting serious, so is Keika. You mean she wasn’t? Because now Keika is all fired up thanks to this letter she wrote to future herself when she was 10 years old. Yeah, filled with hope and optimism to become a professional female shogi player. However in the end, Keika losses. But we all know it is a good game so there is no shame in defeat. Time to shed those tears. She returns home to tell her father that she has to break her promise of quitting. She still wants to play shogi. Even if she cannot become a pro, she still wants to work in this industry. Father moved to tears. Daughter too. More tears. Finally Keika talks to Yaichi about all this. She hints if she can’t become a pro, perhaps she can be his wife. Immediately accepts! I know he likes her but didn’t he make a promise to Ai? She trolls him he will only always be second in her heart. Her first love is always shogi.

Episode 8
There is a Mynavi open challenge for women. The Ai duo are taking it as well as Keika. From what I understand, if Keika passes this and gets through the preliminary match and just win one match from there, she’ll become a professional female player regardless of her status. That easy? But then she lost… So disappointed… The scene that takes the cake is how Yaichi is supposed to make comments on the matches and his partner types it in. She shortens his words (limited comment space is the excuse) and makes him sound like a lolicon! Like as though she really wants to taint his reputation. At the end of the match, Keika somehow wins some remedial match and qualifies for the preliminaries. Yaichi is being approached by Ika Sainokami. She is bugging him for a match and he has to keep refusing this psycho killer girl because he knows she grows stronger by defeating stronger opponents and at the same time ruin their morale. Now Yaichi is providing live commentary for the match Meijin is in. Only, if he cannot be distracted by the cleavage of his partner, Tamayo Rokuroba. I think she is hinting something at him and he likes her good treatment. Till Ai sees this and feels the need to step in. Those eyes… Apparently all his loli disciples are allowed on stage as his special guest? Yeah, it’s like they’re trying to ruin his reputation by saying ambiguous lines of him being a lolicon just to freak out Tamayo. His reputation further tanks when Charlotte kisses him on the cheek. That day, the police station’s lines were ringing nonstop reporting a pedo… Next day, Yaichi and Ginko go to see Rina Shakando who has been holding her title as the professional women’s player for 20 years. She is Ayumu’s master. Ginko plays a match with her and loses. Rina knows what made her lose her composure but Ginko won’t let her say it. Yaichi asks her opinion of Ginko. She has the potential to become a strong professional female player. As for Ika, she is like a demon since her strength is based on egoism. She will hurt and sacrifice others without hesitation to reach her goal. Rina is keeping her in place for now but knows she cannot do it forever. She hopes Ginko will be that seal on that demon when that time comes. Rina has Ginko wear girly clothes to go on a date with Yaichi. Looks like now I know her weakness. To stop her violent behaviour, just put her in such clothes! Her threats now make her sound tsundere + shy girl!

Episode 9
The preliminaries for Mynavi for women begin. Yaichi and Ginko are the commentators but Ika causes some commotion before the start as she reminds Yaichi about his answer. During the break, you bet Ginko is going to interrogate him about that. I believe she just wants to beat him up no matter what he says and make it sound like Ika was his ex-girlfriend. Heck, even Ai is interested to hear this backstory. Yaichi explains how they met and all and how she became obsessed in wanting to play shogi with him all the time. He rejected her but she never gave up. To a point she was once stalking him naked?! As Ika is Ai’s next opponent, she vows to defeat and turn her down. During their match, Ika as usual is making offensive and aggressive moves. Ika starts badmouthing other female players as weak and wants Ai to switch with her to live with Yaichi should she best her. Ika might sound scary and all but Yaichi isn’t worried and believes in Ai. For he knows Ika is arrogant and only cares for herself. She is the kind of person he doesn’t want Ai to become. Ai fights back and leaves Ika literally sweating when the tables are turned. Even planning far ahead to play mind games with her in the sense that Ai could have lost if Ika took certain pieces but because of the daring psychological effect, this has Ika being pressured and making mistakes. Ai will not let anyone take her place with Yaichi. Yeah, Ai wins. More good news with Ai Y and Keika also winning theirs. The Ai duo then make a special thank you announcement just for Yaichi because they remember it is his birthday today (it’s in his name the date). I guess today’s birthday is pretty special. Somebody pushes him so he could hug the loli duo. Such a heartfelt moment. I guess we make it today an exception of not calling the cops. Everyone watches the match that will decide who becomes Ryuuou’s challenger. Can Ayumu beat the Meijin? Nope. I guess it’s Yaichi and the so called god-like undefeated king.

Episode 10
Aloha! We’re at Honolulu. Apparently the first best of 7 matches will be held here. We have a nice reception party and even celebrating Ai’s birthday today. How sweet. Everything looks fine and dandy until the first match begins. It seems if Meijin wins this one, he will break all sorts of records like being in 100 seasons of holding the title as well as the eternal title for all categories. I’m not sure if this is possible but the game is paused midway and will be resumed tomorrow. I know it is taxing but postponement is allowed? I guess we need to take a break to see Ginko in her sexy swimsuit by the sea. Night swim. Of course she forces Yaichi to treat her and being the tsundere she is, she wants him to ‘prove’ he is not a lolicon. She is actually prepared to kiss him but he backs off thinking this is another one of her prank. How sad. The match resumes and it seems Yaichi realizes he is in a pinch. Especially when he is using a strategy he is good at. In short, he lost. I know it is only the first round but it really got to him. Yaichi snaps back at Ai who is trying to cheer on him because his whole shogi world is turned upside down with that. Yeah, all it took was just one match. Yaichi also loses the second match in Osaka. For the third round in Tendou, Yaichi begins panicking and even tries using an eternal looping move to buy time. Though it is not illegal, it is so if it is checkmating move. In which, Yaichi is about to strike out. Realizing this, he panics more and becomes hasty. He lost. He becomes obsessed in researching moves so when Ai tries to request to play a match because of her Mynavi tournament tomorrow, he reluctantly does so. Man, you can hear his heavy pounding. Is he trying to smash the board? It’s scaring Ai. Eventually he smashes it! Oh sh*t. I guess it’s too early to realize he is being a dick so he starts thinking about his current relationship with Ai. It’s wrong. So he tells her tomorrow after her match, she will go live with his master. He has already arranged for her stuffs to be transported there. Thanks to this trauma, Ai cannot concentrate on her match with Tsukiyomizaka and lost. So much so she starts having asthma attacks and collapses! For real?!

Episode 11
Don’t worry. Ai is in the good hands of Keika. She’s playing the big sister tonight as well as giving Ai Y good complimentary for winning her match or else Yaichi would have gone crazy had both Ais lost their match. Speaking of him, he continues to obsess in getting stronger. Even Ginko is here hinting him he can do anything to her like continue where they left off from Hawaii. Yeah, he only remembers that stinging lost. Even madder. He snaps. She snaps. She doesn’t care if he doesn’t have a title as long as they can be together. Wrong timing to bring that up now but if you think Ginko is just going to run away and cry, she is mad first since Yaichi calls her a hindrance. Now she runs away and cries on Keika’s lap, complaining about the jerk. Big sister is sure busy tonight. Today is Keika’s match with Rina. Yaichi wouldn’t have bothered had he not noticed Rina making some big moves. It got him interested to watch and from his analysis, he believes Keika could actually win this. In the end, Keika wins! Now she is a female professional. During her interview, had she not mentioned Yaichi’s name, he wouldn’t have opened his eyes. Too late to cry now. He notices somebody brought lunch outside his doorstep. It couldn’t be Keika since she is away. Oh, right. Ai! Can he just tell by the food? Miraculously he manages to find her. He’s sorry. She wants to be his disciple forever. Big hug. There. We’re back on track. Hey wait. Ai has been promoted to a female professional player 2 days ago? How long has Yaichi been holed up in his room?! Coincidentally the final match is in Ai’s hometown. And Yaichi definitely feels strange because this pre-match ceremony feels like their pre-wedding ceremony! Oh sh*t. Tsukimitsu is even reading their wedding vows but substitute certain words with shogi terms. Yeah, they sign a master-disciple contract that looks like a marriage one. Of course this is part of Tsukimitsu’s ulterior motive to secure this inn as their main venue for future matches. Yaichi shouldn’t feel he is being used first because now he notices Ginko giving him the death stare! A real scary one. Better remember to apologize to her.

Episode 12
Fourth match is here. For the first time, Yaichi feels he came here to play shogi instead of titles. So we see them making moves based on some technique that I don’t understand with many of the characters giving their 2 cents worth about it. Of course Yaichi’s play has changed since playing with the Meijin. Still, he isn’t anywhere close to him and from the looks of his desperate face, it’s like as though he could explode anytime. Yaichi realizes he is going to make that illegal loop move. But after the Meijin makes his move, he calls to suspend the game. Judging from the move he made which is also another illegal pawn drop move, it becomes an extraordinary situation where both players abiding by the rules cannot determine the outcome of the match. A first in history! Therefore this match will be declared invalid. So they’re going to replay it soon? Because I thought with Meijin having 3 wins, he should claim the overall victory. Unless 4 is the magic number. We take a break from shogi stress so Ai could offer her lap for Yaichi to rest. Cue for Ginko and Ai to fight over this situation. Too bad the rematch is now so Yaichi has to get going. Funny, the first match can be postponed the next day but today’s match cannot? I guess things are different in Hawaii and this is an important deciding match too. The rematch sees Yaichi making some improvements but as usual we see Yaichi’s excruciating going-to-explode face. But after a hard fought battle… Meijin admits his loss! OMG! Everybody is celebrating like as though Yaichi won the goddamn thing! There’s even a celebratory party after that so that we can replay that déjà vu scene of Yaichi needing help and Ai is there to give him that help. What does she ask for in exchange? To teach her shogi. In the aftermath, Yaichi won the remaining matches to retain his Ryuuou title!!!!!!!! OMFG!!!!!! Unbelievable!!!! They organize some party but Ai ‘lied’ to everyone to come later so that she could hog Yaichi to play shogi.

Loli-ou No Oh-shit-got-too-many-lolis
Wow. What the hell?! Yaichi won and retained his Ryuuou title?! What kind of utter nonsense is this?! Something like this could only happen because of plot convenience. Personally, had Yaichi lost and the typical cliché ending that he will continue to play and fight for shogi (because everything isn’t so cliché over yet), isn’t as bad. But to make him come back and win by defeating the Meijin? That’s really impossibly impossible. Like as though the Meijin saw his traumatic face and felt pity and threw away the remaining games. All for the sake of Yaichi’s growth that I couldn’t see. Because screw whatever records he is going to break. For the sake of this series’ happy ending and his loli harem, he throws away the matches so that we can all have a good ending. Heck, we don’t even get to see the final 3 matches and hence we can’t judge if they were easy or hard fought ones. Anyhow, it’s like an insult and showing us (and shogi) the middle finger because screw you for the sake of a happy loli ending.

I’m sure there are going to be lots of comparison about this anime with 3-gatsu No Lion. Can’t help it. They’re the only shogi related anime in very recent times. Because Shion No Ou was so long ago and obscure that nobody remembers it. Yeah, I didn’t watch that series either. Anyway, it doesn’t take a genius for those who have watched both these recent shogi themed series to know which one is tops. Okay, for those who don’t, it is 3-gatsu No Lion. In almost every aspect and as overall.

Let’s start with the plot and story. Basically from both anime series, the plot looks paper thin. Young shogi prodigy having to overcome whatever issues they have at hand. It is easy to say that this series does not have enough plot and story because it only spans a dozen of episodes unlike 3-gatsu No Lion in which had 2 seasons and a total of 44 episodes to go along. That’s like almost 3 times the amount needed to flesh out whatever drama, plot and characters needed. But if you take a look at this one, it starts off with Yaichi being the youngest Ryuuou and then somehow he enters a period of slump, hence the rest of the episode sees him trying to pick up the pieces and prove his achievement wasn’t a fluke. Sounds weak and uninteresting if you ask me. And along the way he picks up some loli harem. Like, WTF?!

I believe that if you want to learn some shogi moves or techniques, this isn’t exactly a series to be introduced to shogi. Even 3-gatsu No Lion isn’t a good series if you really want to learn some shogi tips. So like a shogi noob like me who could even barely remember the basic moves of the different pieces, showing the shogi board to me, they could just BS their way through in whatever ways or however they want it because I’m just going to believe whatever impossible moves or comeback moves convenient for the plot to happen. The board looks so alien to me. So when they ramp up the drama with the characters sweating in panic because they didn’t realize or see a move before this, I would be going like, “What?! WHAT?! What the f*ck is happening?! I don’t see anything wrong (obviously)!”. Even if they did mention and briefly explain some shogi moves, it still sounds so alien to me. Whatever. You play whatever moves you want.

Then there are the characters. Forgettable. Everything is so permeating with cuteness and kawaii factor that it makes 3-gatsu No Lion looking like the god of misery. 3-gatsu No Lion’s characters may not be that likeable but you want to root for them because of the problems that are relatable to many of us. Whereas for this Ryuuou loli crap, everything feels so conveniently convenient for the sake of the wafer thin plot. I mean, they tried to drum up some tension and drama when Yaichi was on a losing streak with Meijin. It didn’t work seeing how colourful and glossy everything had been all along. Now they throw in this by making Yaichi a dick? Not going to work. It is going to make us hate him even more. We all know he is going to make up for himself because the plot says so and he is the main character. Yeah, that contorting face of his while facing Meijin is to show some sort of hardship and emotions while he takes on the country’s best shogi player but sometimes it felt comical to a point I was trying to hold back my laughter seeing him stressed out like that. Uh huh. As though the Meijin had no emotions whatsoever and if he so much as to eke out a mini smile, it must mean something. Something, I guess.

It must be a running joke for Yaichi to be the centre guy in this unofficial harem. Mostly loli disciples and a couple of mature females. It’s like he and everyone else is giving this a free pass and not bat an eyelid because they are looking it from a professional point of view. You know, he is the shogi master and they are his disciples. Wow. Everybody is so good that they don’t see anything potentially wrong with it. Unless the plot calls for some little pedo joke. It is amazing Yaichi hasn’t been arrested and his shogi future not in shambles. What’s more, Yaichi being betrothed to Ai at a young age feels so wrong. Although all seems verbal but it doesn’t look like Yaichi is very bothered with it. I mean, all he has to do is not fail, right? Sounds easy until you realize that he is currently in a slump. Oh sh*t. Which makes it mind boggling because he is only being famous for being the youngest Ryuuou and gets so much attention just because he is the main character.

Unlike the true Meijin who has so many records and titles, damn this guy is treated like a mere side character! Show some respect! Making it worse, we don’t even get to see this guy’s face nor has he a voice! Okay, he does. His face is not shown until the final turning point moments and at that point I was ‘disappointed’ because to keep his face hidden for this long time I thought he had a third eye or something. Just some average looking guy. And the only time he spoke is to admit his defeat! I don’t know, but that makes it feel like his character is somewhat a loser, don’t you think? This guy is much more mysterious than 3-gatsu No Lion’s Souya. Thus making this best living shogi player of current time to be nothing more than just a weak character existing just because of the plot. To say that Yaichi’s game with the Meijin woke him up and put in some much added drama. But this still does not avert the fact that this most important man in the game is being given this lacklustre treatment. And after all that he possibly done in the final match for Yaichi, this guy wasn’t even invited to his party. Old shogi rivals were invited but not the Meijin. What an insult. Yaichi, you better hope your retaining of your title isn’t a fluke and you better not be in a slump anymore.

As for the female characters, I guess with a bunch of them, it really gives a different atmosphere compared to 3-gatsu No Lion which is all dominated by men. Middle aged and very old men. So with lots of cute and young (loli) girls, wow, it sure looks like shogi is a little girl’s game too. So much fun. So cute. But I am still confused and don’t understand about the different set of ranking and promotional rules for women. It’s not my place to say but I thought shogi should be like karuta whereby the gender doesn’t matter since it is a game of the mind and not of the body.

Anyway with Ai being the main character and Yaichi’s first disciple, she is only memorable because of all the moe and kawaii aura permeating throughout her existence. The way she acts and talks is so loli wonderful that either you will fawn over her or find it somewhat annoying to a certain degree. I’m sure they want to portray her as a shogi prodigy and hence she wins some of her matches against higher level opponents but that too feels artificial somehow. She has to win because of the plot. And to show that she is a human and not perfect like a robot, there are very, very, very few times that she will lose. All for the sake of the plot. Whatever. To counter all that positive loli cuteness in Ai is the bratty brat Ai Y. I don’t even see the need for her to exist so as to confuse us between both Ais because other than that I don’t even see the intensity of their rivalry as shogi players as well as to become Yaichi’s number one disciple. It feels like Ai Y has been completed side-lined during Yaichi’s showdown with the Meijin. Like as though she has been tossed aside and become an unimportant character to have never existed. Perhaps this is to give more time for Ai to be with Yaichi and reaffirm Ai is supposed to be Yaichi’s number one loli. Ai Y is just for the backup, just in case.

I guess you need a few different tropes of women when you have a harem. Ai as the lovely one (sometimes potential to be yandere), Ai Y as the tsundere, Ginko the amphibian (tsundere or yandere?) and Keika the big sister (also biggest troller to be Yaichi’s wife). Damn you Yaichi! Even if you’re a current failure in shogi, you are sure scoring with a bunch of ladies! This means those shogi friends of Ai are super useless and only exist for some pedo jokes especially Charlotte who is just oozing twice as much moe and kawaii aura than Ai and make innocent little girl statements like wanting to marry Yaichi so that viewers can be irked and call the police. Is it because they are little girls that Yaichi do not take their word seriously they want to marry him? Because he seems to like Keika but she dismisses him. Because Ginko likes him but playing the tsundere and playing the tough girl who always beats him up for any reason turns him off. Don’t worry about Yaichi getting any more mature ladies under his harem. As long as Ai is acting like his jealous wife, you can bet she’ll step in and nip it in the bud. I’ve not even mentioned some of the shogi guys his age who might be gay for him… Damn Yaichi is better known for being popular in the wrong way than his shogi.

I still don’t understand where Ginko stands in the female professional shogi world because it sounds like she is so damn good but at the same time she isn’t up there with the top guns. Her reason to exist in this anime is to provide us with the running joke of beating up Yaichi and blaming him for whatever reasons because it is female’s privilege to do that and not bear any consequences. Guts tell me from the start that her violent nature is to hide her crush on him because can you imagine a very polite and lovely Ginko? Remember, she has a reputation to live up in the shogi world. What snow was it again? Ah, cold as ice… She would have been a lot cuter if she smiles more often… But she is too far down that track to have a sudden character change. We’ll all die (as well as Yaichi) via sudden heart attack.

It sometimes feel that there is this strange focus on Keika. She has been on losing streaks and stuck in her training group for so many years. There is this threat that she will not achieve her dream to become a professional female shogi player by a certain age as stipulated by the rules (who made these damn rules for women anyway?!). This feels like a side story aside from anything that is related to Yaichi and his loli harem. What makes it mind boggling is that she has been losing for so long and the way she sounds like there is little to no hope in making it but all of a sudden, this one Mynavi match, win a few rounds and conveniently defeating Rina who holds the title as Eternal Queen! Do you not see how convenient a plot this is and to add to her character happy ending?! Everybody in Yaichi’s shogi family gets through! Hooray! Wow. I wonder how many women also barely made it through like this. So conveniently convenient that it is conveniently convenient.

As for the other shogi rivals and characters, they lack any depth that would make them likeable. Like Ayumu as this chuunibyou gay for Yaichi or that crazy Ika who could have been a serial killer-cum-stalker had she not taken up shogi and what the heck is Tsukiyomizaka again for? I believe she has another shogi friend and partner who is most of the time with her but I can’t remember her name. So insignificant. I know these characters are supposed to be colourful but in a way it makes them look comical because when you compare it to 3-gatsu No Lion that is so mundane and dull in this sense, ironically that depressing shogi show’s characters feel like it has more life than this one! I know it’s so ironic, right? I mean, like I said when you have the Meijin treated like a secondary unimportant character, it is as though they want you to remember this shogi series as a loli and pedo one.

I want to point out that this series might have a few subtle sexual ambiguity. Aside from the obvious loli pedo hogging many of the scenes as well as those sexual ambiguous cliche scenes that calls for others to walk in and misinterpret the scene, one of the very subtler ones include when Ai is getting serious in playing her shogi game especially making a comeback from a pinch situation, she would move her head back and forth while focusing. I don’t know, it makes her look like as though she is doing a blowjob!!!!!!!!!!! Not kidding!!!!! Call me a pervert because at so many angles, this is the first impression that it gives off to me. Personally the best ‘lewd’ jokes are the ones where the commentator purposely mistypes Yaichi’s words to make him sound like a lolicon. Sh*t might have gotten real if Ika had shown us full frontal nudity in her failed bid to win over Yaichi. Yeah, this series could have easily have a porn parody on its own and fare better! No, seriously.

Art and animation of course has everything so cute and kawaii, bright and colourful. If you like this style of visual, I’m sure this section is where it trumps the very simple looking 3-gatsu No Lion. Thanks to female characters playing shogi, sometimes I feel like this is also a cosplay event. Like Rina who resembles like some sort of witch or rather bride of Dracula. Seriously. And Ayumu is dressed like as though he is going to fight magical beasts from another world when is just going to play shogi. Does this help in playing psychology with your opponents? By a long shot, I thought Ika looked like Kouka from Beatless and Ginko a serious version of Rem from Re: Zero series. This series is animated by Project No. 9 who is better known to animate loli and cute girl anime series like Ro-Kyu-Bu, Netoge No Yome Wa Onnanoko Ja Nai To Omotta, Tenshi No 3P and Saikin Imouto No Yousu Ga Chotto Okashiinda Ga.

You know, I was pretty darn sure that Yui Horie was behind Ginko’s voice. So cock sure that at some points when she sounded a little off, I didn’t even suspect otherwise. Then of course the real shock came when I discovered it wasn’t her. It was Hisako Kanemoto instead. Super failed ~de geso. Now I fear that her voice might confuse me in future anime series since although she is still active in the voice acting world, she is slowing down a little. Another shocker is Haruka Tomatsu as Ika. Argh. So a bit confusing ~de geso. Honestly, I haven’t been hearing her for quite some time so maybe that’s why I couldn’t see it was her.

Other recognizable seiyuus are Ayane Sakura as Ai Y, Sho Hayami as Tsukimitsu, Nobuhiko Okamoto as Ayumu, Kenji Tsuda as Natagiri, Sayaka Ohara as Rina and Yui Ogura as Charlotte. Other casts include Yuuma Uchida as Yaichi (Oga in ReLIFE), Rina Hidaka as Ai (Last Order in To Aru Majutsu No Index), Ai Kayano as Keika (Inori in Guilty Crown), Mitsuko Horie as Akina (Sailor Galaxia in Sailormoon), Kazuyuki Okitsu as Oishi (Madarame in Genshiken) and Machico as Tsukiyomizaka (Serina in Sansha Sanyou). The opening is sung by Machico, Korekara. All lively anime pop style that sounds as generic it can get. The ending theme, Mamoritai Mono No Tame Ni by Miku Itou plays to a slower beat and seems palatable to my taste although it still sounds generic.

Overall, this is a disappointing anime series and even though it came out in the same season as the second season for 3-gatsu No Lion and was never meant to be its competitor, it is impossible to separate and not compare how bad this anime is. Like as though this shogi theme was just a bait and mask its true intention of sexualizing young little girls. Heh. Instead of luring little girls with sweets, you lure them with, uhm, shogi? Whatever. Not too sure if this would lead to give shogi a bad name. Heh. Maybe that is why men and women’s shogi never mixed. When you have a pedo scandal that is blown out of proportion, unlike the game where it just ends with a checkmate, in life it is not just checkmate but literally over. And then imagine this series following the depressing route of 3-gatsu No Lion but with Yaichi now trying to get his pitiful shogi career back on track after earning an infamous reputation. It might be a sad and sorry route but hey, I’m willing to watch that! Truly, shogi indeed needs to be a draggy and depression theme for us to be appreciated.

Mitsuboshi Colors

May 18, 2018

Did Ichigo Mashimaro get some sort of revival? No they did not? Okay. Must be my imagination. Because seeing the poster of Mitsuboshi Colors instantly reminds me of that show. So if you’re into cute girls doing cute things, this is another one of those series falling into that category of the season. Only this time we lower the age of our cute girls. Yup, lolicons rejoice. Our main characters are young girls who go around town doing errands and protecting their town from evil. I knew I shouldn’t have believed it at face value when they said the policeman was the bad guy… It’s not that kind of show…

Episode 1
In the base of Colors, Yui reports a big problem but Sacchan and Kotoha aren’t interested till she mentions about a cat that looks like a panda. When asked to draw it, she draws it like a monster! Thinking they need to slay it, they seek the local police dude, Saitou for help but he shoots them down for having too much time on their hands. He feels guilty when Yui starts crying. He dispenses information about a panda-like cat who has been bothering the people by stealing stuffs. So if they can catch it, they can protect the peace of this town. They go on the case and find it but to no avail. Sacchan thought she could crawl around to get a cat’s eye view but this unleashes Kotoha’s sadism as she steps on her head. Eventually they find it hiding in their own base because they remember it stole something from it and did a stakeout. Saitou wants them to take care of it because if left to him, he will have to leave town forever. Saitou thinks he has washed his hands off this case but the girls promptly ‘thank’ him to pay for cat food. The cat is now named as Colonel Monochrome. The trio bought a rocket launcher from Oyaji’s shop and threaten to shoot Saitou for being corrupt! We know it’s fake but it looks real and Oyaji has a reputation of selling really strange things. They fire but nothing happens. Saitou notices the launcher has a safety button and tells them all about it but snatches it from them. Now he will blow them to smithereens! Only Yui is crying? Does she know what smithereens is? The girls call for a strategy meeting but eventually run away. Saitou fires and its head really launch! Though, it’s fake and Sacchan catches it by her hand. She throws it back to him and it hits his crotch! I guess that ‘exploded’. Saitou grovels in pain while Kotoha steps on his head… Victory. Oyaji brings a safe to Saitou’s police box. It seems a perpetrator left this and a message to whoever gets to crack the code, gets a treasure inside. Colors are excited to solve this case. But they need to solve the riddle of what ‘pan’ cannot be eaten. From bread to trying out puns of frying pan, panda and even panties, eventually they got it right as the code is underneath a panda-like mailbox. Inside the safe is a cat bowl. The mastermind is Oyaji and he noticed the girls went to his shop looking for a food dish for Colonel. Now he leaves it to Saitou to bring the heavy safe back. But the girls are now not happy because the bowl doesn’t look treasure worthy.

Episode 2
Sacchan has Yui dress up as an oni and then make her count because they’re going to play hide and seek. The moment she is done with that, they ditch her and go hang out somewhere else. Poor Yui… Because Kotoha is playing a game that allows her to earn more passes to more similar players are nearby, they decide to hang out at the station. Saitou catches them loitering around and has this idea of getting rid of them by telling them to head to another place with lots more of such passes. He is so happy that they’re gone. Yui is scared she can’t find her pals and starts crying at Saitou’s box. Better tell them where they are before others think you are being mean to her. When she finally finds them at Akiba, Sacchan didn’t even really care. Not even Kotoha. She’s glad she has gotten all those passes. Colors are supposed to help clean up the shopping district. Instead, they see no trespassing signs and think there might be some murder cases behind it. They defy those signs and head into those no entry zones. Each time, a guy tries to tell them to get out but this only reinforces there is something going on and to further defy. In the end, those forbidden places are so because there are wet paint. Yeah, Colors ran around town and it is easy to see their footprints and where they went. Sacchan mom gives them natto. However she warns them not to throw it in the pond. There goes their whatever weird plan of cleaning up the pond. Huh? In the meantime Sacchan and Kotoha enter some weird looping shiratori word game among themselves that loops between only earthworm and moose. At the pond, they meet their friend, Nonoka who learns of their intentions. I guess they saw on some TV how they throw sticky-like substance to filter the water. Not going to work with this one. Sacchan somehow messes herself up with sticky natto all over. In the end, Yui starts crying because she feels guilty of unable to fulfil her promise of cleaning up the pond. So eat the natto as not to waste it? Then Yui comes up with this revelation that maybe it is okay for the pond to stink and in return, the day is saved and mankind is saved. Huh? Then it’s back to that mindless shiratori loop between the duo like as though they’re not giving up on some word war…

Episode 3
When Sacchan’s mom calls her, they rush down to her fruits store to see what the big problem is. So the problem is she has unsold bananas? Yeah, if none gets sold, they’ll be eating bananas for days and nights! Horror! So she wants them to sell them all and in return they’ll get a reward. So the girls get excited to sell them. Like how they trick Oyaji to taste one and then buy a bunch. Oh, he also has to buy the bunch they are eating! Sneaky. Sacchan tries sneaky but not illegal ways to sell them while Yui starts crying because nobody buys hers?! Well, some gullible sympathetic people did. And the ‘best’ part is how they ‘defeated’ a few yakuza guys and sell on their turf. With one bunch left, they decide to sell it to Saitou. He won’t buy it. A granny asks for directions when suddenly Kotoha feigns pain in her stomach and accuses him of police brutality! Others follow suit and grandma believes! To stop the commotion, he buys the bunch. With all the bananas sold, the girls get their reward, which is some creepy cabrilla monster costume they’ve always wanted. Then they go ‘attack’ Saitou but he saw it coming from miles and locks them out of his box. I’m surprised granny didn’t die of a heart attack seeing them. Oyaji gives Colors a bomb. They’re supposed to cut the correct wires or else the town will go boom. But first they need to decipher the clue to which coloured wire they must cut. It says cut the same colour as the eye in the middle of the shopping district. So they go down to the market to see if there are shops selling eyeballs. Not sure about Sacchan as she goes around asking people about poop. Even getting philosophical about how all living things once pooped and how everyone will die and become poop. So deep… Eventually Kotoha realizes the answer. She dangerously climbs on top of the shopping district’s sign. AMEYOKO. Get it? A-“ME”-YOKO. That’s the ‘eye’. It sure did caused some commotion with everyone watching. Oyaji praises them as the girls become ecstatic as they have saved the town yet again. The epilogue shows that if the girls cut the wrong wire, the bomb will shoot out some stink juice. Too bad Saitou bore the brunt.

Episode 4
When Sacchan receives a mail from Nonoka, they quickly rush down to her bakery. A big case is going to happen. As they try to find out which level of seriousness her case is, Yui somehow talks about poop disappearing to where if you don’t poop it out and when you do somehow they end up back in your stomach later. So magical… So deep… Anyway Nonoka claims somebody is going to take over her shop. Oh look. Here is that person. Momoka, her big sister. Momoka doesn’t know how to use a handphone but she has Kotoha act as an intermediary for her to break up with her boyfriend or stalker who keeps calling her! Brutal! Anyway, Momoka’s dream is to take over dad’s bakery after she graduates. However, the thing that has Nonoka disagreed was that Momoka wants to sell onigiri. Of course Momoka made a condition that she must be able to produce dad’s flavour if she wants to retain this shop. She has done so and lets them taste it. Kotoha is smart to let her pals taste how yucky it is. Momoka can’t let her run this shop with bread tasting like that so she lets Colors sample her multi-flavoured onigiri. An instant hit. Now they are on her side. Traitors! Yui and her school are participating in a local parade. Kotoha and Sacchan come to watch her. After the dragon troupe, not sure why Sacchan got disappointed with some baldy parade. Then it’s Yui’s school. Later they see Saitou but since he is working hard and not slacking, they think he is an imposter and leave him alone. After the parade, the pals meet up so they can head to the festival organized by Yui’s school. They see many wearing twinkling pendants so Sacchan teases Yui she can glow like that. Yui makes her face ‘glow’ but feels insulted when they ignore her. They get those pendants and continue to have fun at the festival. Sacchan’s mom picks them up when it’s over. Yui’s pendant stops twinkling so Sacchan quips Yui can sparkle on her own. Yui reluctantly demonstrates with that ‘glow’ face but it leaves everyone speechless and dumbfounded at this lameness that they want an explanation. Yui regrets that everyone should have ignored her instead.

Episode 5
Oyaji dropped a box of retro childhood toys. The girls explore some of them but it looks like Kotoha has taken a liking for the kendama as she whips everything like a nunchaku. Later, Sacchan starts crying after reading a sad story about an elephant died of malnutrition. Just so to make an elephant pun? Yui reads it and genuinely cries followed by Kotoha. They get this idea to visit the zoo to protect them from starving. I guess kids their age can enter free of charge and run around wherever they like. We see Sacchan making a few animal puns along the way while Kotoha tries hard to hide her giggling. They see a tiger eating a big bone and the only big guy they know is Oyaji. Is he dead?! Yeah, this zoo has not much food that they had to sacrifice Oyaji for tiger fodder. They visit many of the other attractions and could identify the common animals. Then they get stumped by this shoebill. Never seen an animal like that, huh? The girls even own some of the adult staffs with their kiddie logic. Like even if the tiger was eating cow bones, it is still bad to sacrifice other animals to feed! A panda’s meal may cause thousands but some people’s daily eating expenses are just a pitiful fraction of that… At the mouse petting farm, they learn mouse can multiply quickly but since there isn’t many here, they think they are being sacrificed as food! Of course it isn’t but since the guy looks a bit like Saitou, they can’t trust the face of a liar! These kids… With more Sacchan animal puns, they finally realize to head over to the elephant’s section. They look pretty okay. Sacchan throws an apple as it chows it down in one bite, impressing them. With everything happy and okay, when Yui tries to make an animal pun, nobody finds it funny. Oh, didn’t they read the no feeding the animals sign? I wonder if this story would turn dark if the elephant died from the apple and the girls are now blamed for its death! OMG! Koroshi-zou… Sorry, bad pun…

Episode 6
Colors are trying to find edible plants in the park and eat. From the book, a dandelion would be good. They also find some blue flower and clover to the mix. So after Kotoha goes to get a pot for them to cook, time to dig in. Tastes horrible. But of course. Then they get scolded by Saitou for trying to cook in the park that could start a fire. Colors are in a meeting to identify their weaknesses. Sacchan points out Yui’s weakness as a cry-baby. Well, she is denying that. While crying. Sacchan tries to fix this by making her wear a fake moustache and change in her speech. Nope. Failed. Yeah, I think she is just making fun of her. Sacchan points out her own weakness is being too cute. Kotoha smacks her face to fix the problem. As for Kotoha’s problem, Sacchan will not let Yui say that secret. Since curious Kotoha insists, with a smile Yui says she sucks at video games. The biggest shock! Have you ever seen Kotoha going into such fit? But in the end despite her weakness, they all still love her. I don’t think it makes her feel better. Colors are wondering why the statue of a last samurai is famous. They think it is photography so they head to Oyaji to buy a little toy car for Colonel to take pictures? What’s this plan to take pictures of panties and be made into a statue?! Oyaji comes up with a better plan to take all kinds of pictures. One of them should be amazing. The girls bet if they don’t get one, they get to take a picture of him without his sunglasses. So around the shopping district they go as Colonel randomly snaps. In the end they found one in which they want it to use as a killer move against Saitou. But Oyaji shows them a picture that could be their next big case. It is a picture of that cabrilla monster! Obviously superimposed but it got Colors hooked on it. Too bad it is curfew time so the girls give up and go home.

Episode 7
Have you seen Yui this annoyed? I mean, Kotoha has been playing her new game for a few days and has not cleared the first level. Yui is so annoyed that she mocks Kotoha she’ll never clear it till she becomes an adult and will clear it for her! I don’t know how Sacchan resolved this because now Yui is crying and begging for forgiveness. Colors are tasked to pick up trash. So they think they can kidnap Saitou in this small plastic bag? Not going to work. He then tells them a trick to quickly finish their job. Find a recycling bin and put all the trash in theirs! Sneaky… Later Colors smell something stinky. They think it is a corpse and run all around town to find it. What would other people think? Plus, do you not think corpses would answer? It is discovered that the gingko nuts are giving off that stinky smell. They collect a bunch of them and then pelt Saitou’s police box with it! Yeah, now the place stinks. With the town in Halloween mood, the girls decide to play a zombie game. It seems Yui must defeat the zombie boss while the rest go and create more zombies. How do they do that? They write on a piece of paper whoever reads this will become a zombie! I guess some people are so bored that they play along. After waiting a while, Yui goes to look for the zombie boss. She’s a bit confused to see some people as zombies. And then she reads the paper. Oh no. Is she now a zombie? But wait. There is a way not to turn into a zombie. Strip down to your pantsu and scream something embarrassing. Will she do it? Will she not? I think she did. Twice. Finally at the park where all the zombies gather, Yui avoids becoming one of them by closing her eyes and then heads straight for the zombie boss (some wooden doll) and kicks it away. With that, everyone is freed from the zombie curse and they praise Yui as their saviour. Do they even know what is going on? I don’t think they do but they felt fun. Really? That was fun? Whatever. Meanwhile Saitou anticipates Colors to play a prank on him. But they never show up. I guess that stinky durian chips trick is going to waste.

Episode 8
Sacchan thinks of finding a new member so they can have a tsukkomi. Yui claims she is good at that part but apparently the rest don’t think so after her lame comeback. So the place to search is the museum? At the rocket exhibit, they think it belongs to Saitou and try to steal it. Too bad the guard stopped them and they got an earful. Next is the taxidermy section and Yui was gullible enough to believe the story of backdoor deals for these animals to not move and thus can’t go to poo. Next up is the dinosaur exhibition. The curator notes they are interested in dinosaurs like him as he explains to them about the T-Rex. I don’t think Colors can just take its bones… With their recruitment drive failed, Yui makes another lame comeback when the duo claim they should visit the next museum in England. Colors find a raffle nearby. It seems you need to buy from selected store and earn 5 tickets to allow you to have a spin for the top prize to Hawaii. Since Nonoka’s shop is on the list, they go bug her. Of course she won’t give them for free and knows they will only mess up if they help. Kotoha comes up with this brilliant blackmail plan that she must give them the tickets not to help and mess up! Win-win situation! Nonoka is so confused that she gives in! OMG! It works! With 3 tickets in hand, they need the balance. Sacchan has this idea to get loads of free pocket tissues being distributed and then trade them. Well, Yui is too shy (till the point she forgets why she is doing this), Sacchan is being annoying and Kotoha being sneaky by trapping and luring people. In the end, they failed. They think of turning their tissues into pocket tissue missiles and their first victim is Momoka. She gives hers in exchange they don’t throw their tissues at others. With enough to spin, not sure if Yui is panicking as she spins the wheel with all her might. So what prize do they win? A pocket tissue! Disappointed? Pocket tissue attack!!!

Episode 9
With a coin each in an eye and one over her mouth, Sacchan is now One Coin Sacchan! Anyway Colors pooled their money so they could buy a weapon?! I wonder what 1500 yen will get them. There is a real weapon store but luckily the owner doesn’t sell to kids. So Colors go to Oyaji instead and with this right price, they get walkie-talkies each. Yeah, have fun. Colors go pray at the shrine as Sacchan and Kotoha pray for the evil to run amok in their town! Their logic is that Colors only exist because of them and with evil around, they can keep the peace. Yeah… Then they spot Colonel and decide to tail where it goes. It looks like it is walking all over the place and the girls are just trying to keep pace. Yui loses her hairband along the way but I guess it is better to follow the panda cat. Eventually after that long walk, it leads them back to their base. Oh, it has got Yui’s hairband too. Then off it goes. Looks like Colors are beat for now. Next time, Colonel. We’ll discover your private life! After eating cookies from a tin, Colors decide to use it as time capsule. They need to bury in a place big enough that they’ll remember and dig it up in 10 years. So Saitou’s police box? Thinking he is the greedy type who wants to steal their treasure, they change their mind. They find the largest tree but Nonoka wonders if the tree will still be around as the park is constantly under construction. She adds her stuff to the time capsule, a photo of her young self eating bread. Colors find it creepy she carries it around with her… Before they bury, Nonoka raises the question that the tin will corrode in 10 years. And so they give it to Oyaji to keep. Yeah, he is the biggest thing they can remember. Oh, he better be alive in 10 years when they come back for it. Are they implying he is that old?! Those rascals… Ah well, 10 years will zoom by in a flash. Or they’ll just forget…

Episode 10
Colors play around in the snow. As they sleep in it, they realize they just missed a poo! Sacchan wants to cover all those poo traps but the rest have a better plan. Threatening to pelt Saitou with snowballs. But there’s a catch. One of the snowballs has poo in it! Hide in your police box while you can! When Colonel brings in a shrine plaque that says “Your secret is out”, Colors think their base is discovered. So they go on a covert mission to head to the shrine to find more clues. I don’t think they know what covert means. Because this involves Sacchan using herself as a sexy distraction while her friends run past him. Sorry, he’s not a lolicon. At the shrine, they see the caretaker. However with the wind almost blowing off his wig, they think this might be the botched secret and tell it right to his face about his baldness! Sacchan’s mom calls Colors as there has been a ‘robbery’. Somebody took their maneki neko and left a note they took it. Colors take up the case to go find the culprit. They try Oyaji’s place first but he doesn’t have any maneki neko that is familiar to Sacchan. Having no lead, they return to their base to discuss their strategy. Taking a look at the note again, they notice a strange powder as well as some weird scribble. When Kotoha gets it, she is usurped by Sacchan. Angry Kotoha loli wrestles her and banishes her never to speak! They head over to Nonoka’s shop as she admits she is the ‘thief’. Actually the maneki neko belongs to her. Sacchan wanted to borrow it but she never returned it. The ransom note was just a normal note to note that she took it back. I guess her handwriting is so bad, hence that garbage doodle. It’s supposed to be her name. I guess Sacchan now has permission to speak. Apologies solve everything. Sacchan then cheekily asks Yui if she was really cute while she was quiet. Just normal. That has got to be the longest period Sacchan ‘shuts up’. Do we like it that way?

Episode 11
It’s hay fever season so expect sneezing. But the one badly affected is Nonoka. Colors try to help her overcome this allergy that she doesn’t want to admit. When she is about to sneeze, Kotoha punches her in the gut! Oh sh*t! Pain is real! It looks freaking weird when lolis are beating up a high school girl! Nonoka beat down! So much so Nonoka admits her allergy and heads off to see the doctor. Now Colors want to avenge Nonoka by destroying all the trees in town! Never knew there were so many trees, eh? But they can’t simply knock down good ones so they go find bad ones. Like the one where they buried their time capsule. I think they’ll break down in pain before the tree will even move. Not a scratch. Momoka is passing by and sees Colors ‘abusing’ the tree. She learns what happened and tells them cryptomeria is the tree that Nonoka is allergic to. So are there any of such trees around? None in this park. This means Nonoka’s allergy is all in her mind. This means Nonoka is a liar. While poor Nonoka is going to get owned by lolis again, at least all the trees are safe. Phew. Colors use their walkie-talkie to play hide and seek again. Yui is it but since she doesn’t want to hear where the duo are hiding, she starts making weird noises to drown out the noise. She goes in search of them but bumps into Saitou. Evil policeman spoils it for her and tells her where they are hiding because he saw them. Yui manages to find Kotoha hiding openly at the station. They then go look for Sacchan but they better hurry because she sent a mail that she can’t breathe… They see a fallen cabrilla monster as Kotoha beats it up. We all know it is Yui in it. I think she’s dead… Because the cabrilla monster is between panda statues, they think the town is being taken over by them. So they rush off to find Yui… Girls, I think you really missed her…

Episode 12
Colors are doing an interview with some of the people in town they know as part of their guide. Taking turns filming and interviewing, we see them interviewing Oyaji (we find out his real name is Daigoro Kujiraoka) but bad camera angles and the guy being too big tires Yui’s arms. There is also an interview with Sacchan’s mom. Daughter praising mom to be pretty and with all the flattery going on, Kotoha zooms in on Yui’s cringe face… Also Nonoka trying to promote her bread and for Saitou, they play a prank by stealing his bicycle and answering a phone call on behalf. Kids, do not even try this. Colors are supposed to head to a granny’s shop for some case but instead got distracted and played at the playground. Colors want to buy mini castella so they get permission from Sacchan’s mom to sell strawberries to people at the hanami. Sacchan impresses with her smooth talking so I guess the rest are fired up to sell them all. Well, if Kotoha doesn’t crash into people’s party (but they still feed her because she is cute) or lie about curing baldness, it would have been one ‘boring’ affair. And I believe everyone is buying from them because they know who they are. They have a last box left to sell so they target this guy who is depressed after failing to land a job. I’m sure it’s natural he wants to talk about his problems since the girls approached him but they tell him straight they don’t care about him! It’s about us! They then force him to eat a strawberry for a special bonus. And that they mean scattering sakura petals all over him. It makes him feel better and motivated to try his luck at the next job. Learning he only has 500 Yen left, they deviously sell the last box to him at that price. Yeah, you’ve been duped. Happy Colors are able to enjoy their mini castella. Lastly, we see Colors dragging a futon into the middle of the park, lie in there and sleep. It’s part of their surveillance thingy too. Saitou doesn’t even bother because this is peaceful, right?

Himatsubushi Colors
And so the town is once again kept peaceful thanks to the heroic and tireless efforts of… Saitou and the rest of the townspeople! Haha. You think I’m going to say Colors?! They’re just running around having fun. I mean, take a look at the last episode whereby they just did the unthinkable of sleeping in the middle of the park with people in broad daylight. Nobody cares because WTF. I’m sure the town knows them well to leave them alone because there will be hell to pay if you disturb them from whatever they are doing. Let sleeping lolis lie.

The series is kept funny with the charms of Colors. Is it because they are little girls running around town like as though they own it, the reason why we see them as being cute instead of annoying? I am pretty sure that Colors are of the age where they attend school. At least kindergarten. But why don’t I see them ever going to school? Does this series take place during an entire summer vacation? Oh, now I remember that Yui has a school she attends but we don’t see Colors attend any. That is why you see them so free running around and doing what they want. They’ll need all that when they grow up because oh boy, I’ve got news for them when they reach adulthood or even their teens. Thus everyone in town who knows them let the girls roam freely because otherwise there would be responsible adults who get worried seeing unsupervised children running around and send them to the police box and whoever their parents (we only know Sacchan has a mom) will have their kids taken away by the agency for child neglect.

So our adults in town let these 3 kids run around and do as they wish. So much so they think they are some sort of heroes of justice and protecting the town when they are just having fun with so much time on their hands. Heck, they might even get away with murder for all we know! It’s so peaceful that the only times when peace is broken is Colors doing a little mischief. I mean, do they even have any homework to do besides to go bug the few familiar characters in the series? Uh huh. I’m so jealous these kids really have all the time in the world. So much time that they actually are arrogant condescending little brats who go around bugging others in the name of justice and peace. In a way it is a good thing they are just kids and nobody takes them that seriously. I fear they might grow up to be delinquents if they continue to have their way and nobody teaches them to tow the line.

Yeah, Colors have even so much more time on their hands that basically the next episode preview (termed as Colors Evaluation Meeting) lasts for about a minute. Even for the final episode (well, technically it isn’t a next episode preview). It might not be that long of a time but generally most next episode preview lasts 30 seconds at most. Time wasting? Yes, this segment has them talking about crap and nonsense that we’re supposed to find funny. Because lolis are doing it so it better be. Oh yeah, did I mention that for a small group of girls, they really have a big and cool base of their own. What kind of kids their age have this kind of decent base to hang out any time they want?!

The trio making up Colors are charming in their own ways but still utterly generic. Because in such groups you have the typical troublemaker as we see in Sacchan. Other than the dumb ideas and logic this girl conjures, it is like she is trying to establish herself as the ‘poop girl’. Because in every episode you can guarantee that she says some unko line. Having a little girl who loves to say sh*t makes you raise your eyebrows of what kind of parenting she has or the influences she got. Then you have the gullible cry-baby who is no other than Yui. She might look the weakest but her strongest point is being brutally honest in your face. Even if she doesn’t intend it to be. Finally a seemingly emotionless girl, Kotoha. But she sounds more like tired perhaps for half of the time she is seen holding her handheld console and trying to beat the game. Yeah, she really looks like she is struggling so could it be that she really sucks?

As we all can see, Saitou isn’t really the evil policeman that Colors paint him to be. I am thinking that if he tries to convince them and play the good cop, they won’t even believe it. Their minds have been ingrained to think he is a bad cop. But having so much fun with each other, aren’t we? So he goes with the flow to play along with Colors and pretend to be the baddie. After all, in such a peaceful town you can catch him yawning a few times. Thanks Colors for help alleviating some of his boredom. But I’m sure he prefers to stay out of whatever schemes they have in mind for him. To him, a day without any pranks is definitely considered peaceful already.

Nonoka looks like a Colors’ fan since she is one of the few people whom Colors bug frequently. Or at least bump into often. She too has her own quirks like not admitting the allergy she has until some awful beat down by lolis make her take a hard look at reality. And why can’t a bread shop have a bit of variety and sell other stuffs? If Kotoha sucks as much at her video game, then Nonoka sucks a lot at bread making. I can envision her shop closing down soon if nothing is done. Don’t bet on Colors to save the day then. Momoka is more mature but when you’re dealing with little girls like everyone else, you have to play their game and at their pace.

Oyaji is quite the gentle giant. He is nice man looking out for Colors (though not through direct 24/7 supervision). The only thing you’ll remember him for is his weird sunglasses collection. In every episode, he wears different sunglasses designs. No 2 designs are the same. I guess this is his trademark. Speaking on this topic. It seems I also notice the same for Kotoha as she wears different hats most of the time. Can’t say all the time because I didn’t notice this until halfway point.

Adding more to the cuteness and kawaii factor, what could be as adorable and even more than lolis? An animal mascot! No, I’m not talking about that hideous cabrilla monster outfit that Colors have this weird liking for. It’s Colonel the panda cat. I thought it was pretty unique to have a cat that looks like a panda but it doesn’t play any prominent role in this series. Not even that single episode that it was focused on. That wasn’t anything much. Perhaps to keep the mystery of Colonel’s origins? I don’t think this cat is even Colors’ official pet.

The main reason why I thought this was a revival or spin-off of Ichigo Mashimaro is because of the character designs. When I first saw Yui, I thought she was Chika. They look bloody similar! Heck, I even saw shades of Miu in Sacchan. Also, Nonoka in a way reminds me of Nobue. So yeah, the very simplistic art style of the series is the big reason why I thought so. However both series are not even related to each other despite the general plot being generally similar (in the broadest sense) and are written by different authors. Like a decade apart when they first published. One thing I noticed about the art and animation is its bright and vivid colours. Among all the anime series I have watched in that particular season, this one stands out as the brightest of them all. Not to say it is glaring but you notice the colour stands out. Also, the background and sceneries of the town and park look real enough. Like as though they took pictures of the street and used them here. It is filled with a good amount of details and this adds to the overall vibrant looks of the anime.

Didn’t really recognize all of the seiyuus here. The main trio are pretty convincing voicing their part as lolis. But then again, most Japanese voice actresses tend to have this shrieky voice that all of us have come to identify with. So we have Yuuki Takada as Yui (Aoba in New Game), Marika Konno as Sacchan (Niwaka in Akiba’s Trip The Animation) and Natsumi Hioka as Kotoha (Machi in Kumamiko). Other casts are Ayaka Asai as Nonoka (Hazuki in Hibike! Euphonium), Hisako Toujo as Momoka (Miko in Animegataris), Atsushi Tamaru as Saitou (Ayato in Gakusen Toshi Asterisk) and Tesshou Genda as Oyaji (Kaido in One Piece). The main trio of Colors sing the opening and ending theme, Colors Power Ni Omakasero and Mitsuboshi Colors Honjitsu Mo Ijou Nashi respectively. Both songs are quite lively and fit the theme of the series as well as the happy and carefree state Colors are in. Hope they will enjoy a happy childhood.

Overall, this is a simple show of 3 young girls having fun in the town they live in. No over-exaggerating plots or twists or even lewd jokes. Except for all the poop remarks that Sacchan made. Even so, we forgive them just because it comes out from the mouth of a little girl. Yeah, we’re going like “Cute…” instead of “Watch your mouth, buster”. If Non Non Biyori is about girls having fun in the simplest way in the countryside, then this series is about (loli) girls having fun in the simplest form in the urban area. A bit more exaggerated due to the wild logic and ideas they have but I guess we can look at it as a good thing because it shows how creative they are? Well…Childish you might say but hey, they’re acting their age, right? And nothing says total peace when you have a town with girls who are able to go around and have fun as they wish without anyone having to worry one bit. Keep and carry on protecting the peace, Colors.

Tantei Kageki Milky Holmes TD

November 28, 2015

OH YEAH!!! THEY’RE BACK!!! It is good to know that our adorable dummies detectives are back for a third season (fourth, if you considered that side spin-off as the third). Therefore I couldn’t really wait to get my hands on Tantei Kageki Milky Holmes TD seeing the ‘amazing’ kind of track record they have. Oh yeah. Milky Holmes. The name that rings shame and disgrace for true detectives all around the world in real life or fiction but brings joy to all those who enjoy their silly antics (like yours truly) as they stumble their way to become the world’s greatest detectives. And I hope they’ll take many more years for that. Haha! So, will they become True Detectives or will they become Totally Dummies at the end of it all? Isn’t that what TD is supposed to mean? Oh heck, I can’t wait any longer. Bring on mah dummies!

Episode 1
Fans are enjoying the idols’ performance when suddenly they cannot sing anymore! Even baffling is that all records of their voice are missing from CDs, tapes, files, etc. Could this be the job of a phantom thief? Phantom Thief Empire? Well, a personal call from Arsene reveals they don’t steal music. And so Kokoro takes it upon herself to find the culprit before her eternal rivals Milky Holmes does. She and her partner, Keiko are now suspecting Marine Amagi who is the most popular idol in the country now. Especially her Song of Miracles which is billed as the top song ever. As explained by her Producer and Manager, Marine possesses Toys that allows her Elements to take physical form. They have the ability to attract people who listen to it. As Marine has been singing this song with her Elements since young, there is no way she could be the culprit. Further observation on Marine shows that she is a kind hearted person among her peers. During her live concert, the same tragedy strikes. How can somebody steal her ability right in front of all the cameras and fans? In fact, all of her Elements have been stolen too. Feathers thought they can help but here comes those bumbling Milky Holmes! They know who the culprit is! Who?! KAZUMI???!!! WTF?! She is arrested and sent to prison! Meanwhile Marine’s fortunes turn for the worst. As she cannot sing, she retired and started appearing in variety shows but that itself didn’t make her go anywhere. Manager thought she should do something else but Marine has always bent on only becoming a singer. That is why she will swallow her pride and quit. I don’t know if Kokoro is making a joke because she says if Marine retires, she’ll arrest her?!

Then Milky Holmes pop up to announce that Manager is the real culprit behind this. She forced Marine into a corner and stole her confidence. Something about this lovely figurine of poor Marine that will be selling like hot cakes. Wow. So cute. Let me have one! Ahem… Manager shows her true colours but even surprising is Melodia, one of the Elements popping out from her cleavage. Melodia then challenges them to play a game with her. In this alternate dimension, if they win, they can have Marine back or else she will stay here with Melodia forever. So in this silly obstacle race, Milky Holmes do all they can to win it. Don’t even ask about that silly logic because Manager had bigger boobs that makes her float so the rest sting themselves to ‘inflate’ certain parts and do the same. In the end, Sherlock wins in. Kokoro is about to arrest Manager but Melodia says it is not her fault. When Elements were stolen from Marine, they were sucked into the person closest to them. Melodia couldn’t understand why but she felt she wanted Marine all to herself. Manager admits she did try to push Marine hard and because of those feelings it made Melodia go berserk. With Melodia returning to Marine, they notice her voice returns a little. This means if they gather back all her other Elements, she’ll regain her voice again. When Marine lost her Elements and Song of Miracles, she gave up but Milky Holmes taught her never to do that. Wait a minute. Those bungling detectives teaching somebody lessons in life? OMG. The world is going to end?! Yeah, they don’t even remember the incident where they lost their Toys, live in an attic and all those shameless stuffs…

Episode 2
Kazumi is finally freed from prison… See how much life it took out from her? You better sincerely apologize you Dopey Holmes! So they discuss about the other Elements. As Melodia points out, it is impossible for them to live outside humans so they must have been absorbed and living in other people. This confirms it. Kokoro is a big fan of Marine and is drooling while watching her video. Pink Lovely Doom appears before her. Oh God. It is that IQ bragging running joke… Pink Lovely Doom knocks her out. Not so smart now, are you? Milky Holmes thinks the culprit is the one who is jealous of Marine’s songs. Her idol mates are the prime suspects. Holy cow! Manager has brought hundreds of them here! How many of them exactly in this band? They wanted a million members… And Sherlock starts accusing one by one they are the culprit. Damn clones… Producer has a dubbing job for Marine. She accepts the monster voicing role but fellow idol Senna is not pleased because Marine already lost her voice and she hasn’t been fired yet. Does she think doing a movie will help her return? Sorry but Senna won’t help her. Instead, Miki Hojou would gladly help out Marine. Haven’t finished accusing yet, Sherlock? As they head for the audition, suddenly this idol gate crashes. Mayu Hanasaki looks suspiciously like Kokoro… She sings her Perfect Song in which it is so perfect that Dummy Holmes give her a perfect score. Even dumber as they are, they think this weird mascot, Capriccio is an Element. She badmouths Marine cannot sing but since Mayu’s beeper is beeping like Ultraman’s low energy warning, it’s time to go. Later as Milky Holmes try to have Marine name all her Elements (obviously she can’t because there are so many of them), Marine feels sad because she doesn’t want to go back to a place where she is not remembered.

And so the final showdown for the audition pits Marine and Mayu in a wrestling ring. Nero becomes the commentator while the rest are Marine’s assistants. Mayu unleashes some handshake power but Cordelia knows how to counter it. Now she fights back with some handmade sweets move to put Mayu out of commission. She is about to target Capriccio but Marine feels pity. In this distraction, Cordelia is owned as Capriccio reveals about the dog-eat-dog-world in show business. Survival of the fittest. Might is right! Marine becomes mad. Idols don’t need power. They need love. And she’ll prove it to her. She transforms into some Sailormoon spoof and with her Idol Shoulder Fist punches Pink Lovely Doom out of the Capriccio costume. Shocked that she is not an Element? Well, she never said she was one. She reveals that her goal is to find the phantom thief who stole Marine’s Elements. For that phantom thief to do that means they must be powerful. It is now a race to see who will find that phantom thief first. With Pink Lovely Doom gone, Mayu’s mask falls off and everyone recognizes her as Kokoro. No memories of what happened? Well, at least Marine wins the audition. Stronger and motivated, she vows to reclaim all her Elements and won’t give up. That’s the spirit. During the monster dubbing sequence, she tries her best to roar but sounds so meek and cute. Can she muster up a real roar? RAAAAWWRRR!!! OMG! She sounds like the real deal!!!!!!!!

Episode 3
Marine and Miki are in some curry promotion shoot. But she has to do several retakes. Getting sick of curry? Milky Holmes has no decency to even try their own curry in front of her. When Producer mentions about some shrines job, Marine instantly accept it. Milky Holmes doesn’t have to come but they insist. Why do they look like they’re here to have fun? It gets worse when Manager screws up their timing because they missed the flight. You don’t think they are here early because their flight is supposed to be at 1pm and now it is 3pm. 10 hour wait? You’re freaking late! No choice, they start trekking through the desert. They miss the only bus whose frequency is only once a day. Milky Holmes starts becoming idiotic as they continue their misadventures. Even more annoying is how they sleep talk about how rich they are. I can understand why Marine is so freaking upset if they are really here to protect her. Yeah, she can’t really believe these girls are detectives. When they reach a local Indian-like city, they learn the prince has some sort of obsession for curry and those who do not satisfy him will be imposed very big tax. First thing Milky Holmes does? Let’s go eat! Can’t work on an empty stomach! But they become scared seeing this magma curry and start pushing it around. Now you see their true colours, Marine? You have every right to be upset and walk out! Dummy Holmes doesn’t want the curry to waste and start licking the ground!!! ALL TOO FAMILIAR!!! Their curry is more important that they realize too late Marine is gone.

Marine conducts her own investigation but the guards capture her and throw her in the dungeon before the prince pops up with some business with her. Milky Holmes sneaks into the palace easily since the guards are pretty occupied in catching a pair of phantom thieves intruding the place. They are Feathers and this is just a diversion. You think those guards care if they are detectives or thieves? Stick ‘em up! With Cordelia’s Toys, they manage to trace Marine in the prince’s throne room. Marine is surprised to hear that Milky Holmes is here to save her and she feels bad for abandoning them. It seems the prince is possessed by the Harmony twins from Elements. As usual, another game on. The one who can make the best curry wins. Milky Holmes gathers the ingredients but because Nero wants to use the sacred cow meat, she gets chopped off! There goes her appearance for the rest of this episode. After both sides finish, the prince starts tasting. The usual super exaggerated effects when he tastes the Harmony twins’ dish. No reaction from Milky Holmes so does this mean the Harmony twins won? Surprised! He announces Milky Holmes as the winner! But why? He lets Marine tastes it and she could taste all the hard work Milky Holmes put in. She realizes this effort was because they never gave up on her. The Harmony twins reveal the prince was not at fault as they were attracted to his power and passion for curry. Of course his strong feelings for it mean they went berserk. The Harmony twins return to Marine and the prince is kind enough to lend his private luxury jet for them to return. They can’t help feel somebody is missing… Oh Nero…

Episode 4
Marine and Milky Holmes get lost in the forest while trying to find a hotel. Don’t ask. Milky Holmes see an old lady passing and thinks there must be a cottage nearby and rushes straight to her. But they end up in a mansion of a lady named Sakiko Kinumiya who claims she has been living here all by herself. She asks for Marine’s autograph since she is a big fan of hers. Actually she is a fan of one hit wonders. Milky Holmes misinterprets what that means and seeing they can live the luxury life, they agree to work for Sakiko by getting all 88 stamps. So we see them participate in variety game show challengers against other one hit wonders in Sakiko’s amusement park. Meanwhile Sakiko and Marine watch them on TV as Sakiko praises the perfect one hit wonder Marine is. However Marine doesn’t want to be that and wants to continue to sing. This irks Sakiko so she imprisons her in an iron helmet trying to brainwash her. Milky Holmes is on a winning streak but have to face a video arcade master. The one who scores the most points in 3 minutes wins. Nero thought she can do a better job but when she realizes she is lagging behind and tries to use her Toys to change the scoring system, it shuts down and reboots. Game over? Suddenly Feathers drop in to help. They claim their chipmunk teeth are magical accessories that allow them to beat any game. Don’t worry. Their hand is so fast that the score keeps adding up at incredible speed to make a comeback win! Milky Holmes wins! Now they need 1 more stamp. Unfortunately nobody knows who the 88th person is since there are only 87 of them. Have they been cheated? Oh, but here comes Sakiko to introduce Marine as her newest one hit wonder member. Suddenly Shout, one of the Elements pops out from Sakiko. They’re going to play a quiz game about rock. I don’t know. They have to choose between food and daily items. What do they have to do with rock? I don’t understand Shout’s explanation either… Oh heck, was it supposed to make sense? In the end, it is a draw. Milky Holmes gets their final stamp and is happy to join Marine in her luxurious one hit wonder life. However Marine has been trying to fight against this. She doesn’t want it to end here and wants to continue singing. Her determination is so great that she breaks out from her iron helmet. She is emitting a light brighter than any one hit wonder. The light of a true star! Shout is impressed with her enthusiasm and returns to her. It is revealed that Sakiko wanted to test Marine’s talent to see if it’s real or not. But thanks to it, Marine knows what she wants now. But Sakiko’s obsession with one hit wonders is true. Because she used to be one and wished that moment could last forever. She kept it all in her amusement park.

Episode 5
Marine will be starring alongside Carol Dodgson in Spygirl 4. Producer thought it will be a good opportunity to show the world she can do more than just sing. However the director sees them and there is a threatening letter to Carol. She is a total b*tch, badmouthing Milky Holmes for not being serious as her bodyguards (because Nero asked for her autograph) and she doesn’t want to be friends with Marine. I guess when you’re a big child star like her, you don’t want to mix with have-beens. Later the director reveals Carol is on the edge right now as today is her birthday but she hates celebrating and wants to continue working. It has been hard for her to work with adults and she doesn’t have friends her age. Milky Holmes didn’t know they are to play stunt doubles and get into trouble in the forest, running into a bear and falling off a cliff. But it seems Milky Holmes isn’t goofing around. The autograph Nero got, they have analyzed it and realize the perpetrator is the same. Shortly, Kokoro is called to the scene because the director receives another threatening letter. Milky Holmes has Carol follow them into the forest. Suddenly Sherlock points a gun at her and tells her she is their hostage! What gives?! Then they got hide in some cave as Feathers give them some delivery goods. Milky Holmes happily dancing around the bonfire? Marine is sorry for what is happening to Carol although she has no clue what Milky Holmes is up to. Carol scorns her for losing her ability to sing. She’d rather die than go through that. Looking at Marine pisses her off because it reminds her of her future self. She grabs the gun to fire a warning shot but it’s fake. Turns out this is a surprise birthday party Milky Holmes planned. Carol is not happy. She doesn’t want to celebrate. Milky Holmes is puzzled that she wrote a threatening letter to herself. They think she has been working so hard every day and can’t make friends or even celebrate her birthday.

She admits she did write that letter but it’s not because she doesn’t want to work but to ensure her status as an eternal star. She was going to disappear forever after filming but now she’ll take all of them along with her. Then one of the Elements, Rhythmic pops out. In this wonderland dimension, Rhythmic explains time stops here because Carol doesn’t want to grow up. As she is a child actress, she’ll be worthless when she grows up. Marine argues she is wrong and this isn’t what Carol wants. She doesn’t want Rhythmic to steal her happiness. Rhythmic decides to play a game and if they win, they can have her back. So they’re playing a game of jenga. Milky Holmes is going to lose on their turn when Sherlock hypnotizes Cordelia to be a block. It fooled Rhythmic so when it is Carol’s turn, Cordelia is hypnotized back to normal and the blocks crumble. In the aftermath, Rhythmic points out Carol is not the phantom thief. She felt scared that if she can’t be with Marine, she can’t make people happy. Same for Carol. She feared of growing up and relied on Rhythmic. After Rhythmic returns to Marine, Carol talks to her that she often listened to her Song of Miracles when she is going through hard times. That is why she had the director casted her in this movie. But for Marine, after seeing how Carol placed priority in her acting, she realizes she didn’t give her singing the same importance. Therefore no matter how hard it gets, she wants to go back singing. Carol requests for her autograph by Marine can’t give it to her now. Not at least she can sing again. But they can be friends. Kokoro then arrests Milky Holmes because they wrote a dumb threatening letter to pay them a year’s supply of fish cakes and bananas. Yeah, who else could write such a joke?

Episode 6
It must be a bad day for Kokoro. She is sick but still has to go to work since her G4 pals are also out sick. Worse, Milky Holmes is here to visit! Not enough energy for a retort? Keiko suggests cancelling their traffic safety course but Milky Holmes would gladly help out. So they do a poor impersonation of G4 and I don’t think they’re fooling anyone. The kids are not impressed. Even the old guy (who is Arsene in disguise) tells them to do it properly! Milky Holmes sees Producer and the rest watching a video. Did Marine upload a video? No. This is an impersonator. Despite the butt hurt comments, this video has 7 billion views! At this rate she will become more famous than the real one. Sherlock knows who the culprit is. It is Miki! What kind of joke is this?! Thanks to this commotion, Marine finds out about this. Sad girl. Milky Holmes gets cracking on the case. Nero calls Feathers to help find out about Nerima Tenkujo, the one who uploaded the video. They finally discover her location. Despite looking like a duplicate of Marine, she is just a plain girl without all that makeup and accessories. Seems Nerima is a big fan of Marine and believes she must make more videos for her. Besides, she is not doing anything illegal and the site she uploads the videos have permission to use her music. The real Marine pops up and she believes it is not Nerima’s fault as it was herself who lost her Elements to begin with. Nerima starts talking crazy that since everyone has forgotten Marine ever since she lost her singing, she will become famous in her place. All her fans will love her in her place! Sherlock throws a tantrum that this will make Marine feel sad so Nerima throws down a challenge. She will upload a new video tomorrow. They will also upload a video and if they can get more views than hers in a week, she will delete the videos. If they lose, they will resign as detectives. They think being a video star is easy, huh? Well, Sherlock’s Kamaboko walking through a box only nets her double digits. Same case with the rest on filming whatever that was. At least Hercule got 10,000 views because she was unintentionally reading a fairytale in an erotic way! Plus, it was tagged as an adult video.

Nerima is glad those Dummy Holmes are no match for her. She has already amassed a billion views. But she sees the people talking about a new video that is all the rage. It is Marine dancing. Even more worrying is she has gotten over 900 million views. Nerima then decides to use her secret weapon. By pressing F5 key, she will refresh the page and add to the views! But nothing happens. That is when Milky Holmes caught her in the act. They have replaced her keyboard with all F5 keys! They knew she was the culprit after noticing her F5 key has been worn out. Nerima becomes upset. One of the Elements, Dancing pops out. Time for another battle. They thought it is going to be a dance battle but it turns out whoever can be a real boy wins. Dancing transforms Nerima into a girly boy to flirt with Nerima. Could have almost stole her heart had Milky Holmes not snap her out of it. Not it is their turn, Nero could have fitted the part well but they decided to pick on Hercule and turn her into a guy. That banchou outfit is so unconvincing. However Hercule makes her move. She isn’t just being a real boy. She is manly! Look at her Adam’s apple! Well, actually the cough cold deepened her voice since Hercule caught a little flu from Kokoro. Dancing admits defeat and returns to Marine. Nerima laments all she wanted was to support Marine. But Marine has learnt a valuable lesson from this. Idols need their fans to believe in them. Milky Holmes thinks they can make Marine more famous by uploading secret videos of her. You want to know why Marine is embarrassed and has had it with this worthless crap? It is a video of her sleeping. Aww… So cute…

Episode 7
The first thing Marine sees when she walks into office… Milky Holmes arguing among themselves… About lemon and friend chicken… I’ll spare you their argument details. Marine is disappointed because she thought they taught her about getting along at that Indian kingdom but this only puts oil on the fire. Because Nero remembers she was left behind and nobody cared! The argument intensifies… Later Marine talks to Miki about this and Marine is confident she won’t give up yet. That night as Nero goes to apologize to the rest, surprisingly they apologize first. Wow. Friendship back on track so fast. Next day, Nero has some weird rosy dream and when she is wakes up for a bodyguard job, she starts acting girly! Marine thought she could diffuse the lemon-fried chicken problem but to her shock, Milky Holmes doesn’t care about it anymore. What just happened? Milky Holmes will be Marine’s bodyguard as she heads to a TV drama set. She will be starring along with Hiroko Tenma whose beauty has never aged since 10 years ago. There are rumours she might be a vampire. Because so, they think Marine is in deep trouble to be her next victim. As they make their way to the set, they get horrified by Tenma coming out of the coffin. Useless Holmes minus Nero all fainted. Turns out the crew was just rehearsing. When Tenma looks at Nero, something between them click. Once the rest of Milky Homes wakes up, they are shocked to see Nero in a traditional Japanese outfit and she has agreed to become Tenma’s adopted child! It is because she looked like her child she lost a long time ago. Of course they are sad because this would mean the breakup of their partnership.

Of course Marine heard rumours from other staffs that they never knew she had a daughter. Manager heard another rumour that Tenma adopted a daughter 10 years ago but there was a boy she often took along with her to shootings but one day she stopped bringing him. Could it be she is really a vampire? When Milky Holmes goes to see Nero because they miss her (really), suddenly coming out from her is one of the Elements, Poemi. They are going to play a traditional Japanese quiz game. I don’t know how this one works but Nero is taking a great lead. Marine makes a comeback after getting that determined feeling. And then when she answers about being a true mother, Tenma as the host gives her maximum points for her to win the game. When Nero is back to normal, she genuinely apologizes to everyone. Everyone is getting emotional. Group hug! Poemi returns to Marine. Later it is revealed the rumours on Tenma were true. She did have a son and Nero looked very much like him. So she mistook Nero for a boy? The daughter she adopted 10 years ago was her maid. Tenma realizes she has been neglecting her and wants to restart as a true family. Her son somehow left and she treated her as his replacement. This time she’ll be her true daughter. Milky Holmes get brutally honest about Nero’s character and here we go again with their silly argument…

Episode 8
Kobayashi calls Milky Holmes that there has been another case of a stolen Element that is similar to the case they have been working on. This means Milky Holmes and Marine are off to London! They meet Oscar who may look like a pretty boy but is actually a woman. She comes from a family of making the finest tea and her only Element, Noblesse has been stolen on one stormy night. She has her butler, Andrew let them taste the tea. Although it is delicious, Oscar views it is not enough. Ever since Noblesse has disappeared, she couldn’t make the best tea anymore. She feels she doesn’t deserve to inherit the Duke of Twilight title and become the head of the family. Her aunt, Jeanne suggests giving that title up to her goofy son, Nicholas since he is a boy. But Professor Cline Nevalt, the famous tea critic believes that cannot be the case since Elements stay with those who are suited to be the next Duke of Twilight and gender has nothing to do with it. Milky Holmes gets cracking to find Noblesse. That night Marine sees Oscar and cheers him up with her Elements. He notes that having an Element is proof of talent. He felt that because Andrew was always there and tasted the tea for him. Marine mentions about his funny glasses so Oscar laughs. He explains Andrew used to play with her a lot but one day she had an accident and he saved her. This caused severe lost to his vision and if he doesn’t wear glasses he cannot see anything. When Marine goes back, a knight armour threatens the detective to take her friends back or else. But Cordelia comes to save the day as the armour runs away. She knows who the culprit is and calls everyone to gather.

Putting back the armour that was situated in the front hall that everybody can use, it seems only somebody small can fit into this. It couldn’t be Nicholas or Jeanne and the obvious person could be no other than… Cline! WTF?! This guy is wheelchair ridden, can’t you see that?! They believe he is faking his disability and egg him to stand up! Nope. Wrong deduction again! Cline now plays detective. He has Marine remember the knight’s words. He mistook her for a detective and miscalled her Hercule. It is obvious, isn’t it? It is no other than Andrew! So the butler did it, huh? He has to take off his glasses to don the tight armour. Noblesse then pops out from Andrew. She wanted to relieve Oscar of her burden. Now they’re going to play a game. If Milky Holmes can get out of this living maze, she’ll return to Oscar. They have a time limit and the maze can change. Cordelia sees some plant eating bugs in Cline’s hands and uses it to make the maze open a path to Oscar. Noblesse tries to stop them but Marine summons her Elements to make a beeline to reach the finish line. Noblesse reveals Andrew did not steal her. On that stormy night, she went to hide in him so as to relieve Oscar’s burden of being the next head. But Andrew feels responsible. He is always jealous of Oscar and Noblesse being together. He thought she would love him if Noblesse was gone. Oscar cannot believe this and fires him. After all these years and he doesn’t know her feelings. Oscar believes Noblesse chose him that night. Andrew hugs her, will quit has her butler and make her his wife. Everyone enjoying this romantic drama? At the back, it seems Cline can actually walk but he is Kobayashi in disguise.

Episode 9
Cordelia suggests using Ouija Board to help find the next Element. Wow. Is it really working? Because it point to some casino island and a new international casino branch to be opened by Scarlett Ohada. With the hospitality of the prince (Milky Holmes pigging out his curry meal), they make their way there and the moment they land, Sherlock is being struck by some android girl, Ann Gardy. They attend the opening ceremony as Milky Holmes uses Ouija Board to find the Elements but since it predicts numbers for them, Milky Holmes becomes greedy and starts gambling. Marine meets Miki who is here to do an opening gig. Marine then sees Milky Holmes being taken away because when their winning streak turns into losses, they start borrowing from loan sharks to repay their debt. And they kept losing… Noir the Black Dealer wants to play a game with Milky Holmes as instructed by Scarlett. They thought if they can beat her, the debts will be erased. Nope. Element Decrescendo pops out from Noir. If she loses, Decrescendo goes back to Marine otherwise Noir will take all of her Elements. First they play poker. Noir is confident her four-of-a-kind will win it since Milky Holmes only has weak hands. But she didn’t expect Marine to get a Royal Flush! Next game has cards with girls claiming they are 17. But one of them isn’t. Which? Marine is going with her guts but she accidentally sneezes and picks up another one. This proves to be the correct card. Wow. Such incredible luck. In the final game, Marine must walk across a panel in which certain tiles are loose. If she falls down, it’s game over. Noir believes she will lose because a column of tiles are all loose. However Marine jumps over and wins it. Marine and Milky Holmes hurry back as they want to catch Miki performing. Noir laments her failure to Scarlett. Although Scarlett says she has fulfilled her duty and was no match for her unnatural luck, Scarlett views Noir as useless and wants her to leave. This is her only home. Where is she to go? Not her problem. If you’re wondering where Ann has been all the time? She’s been playing the slots and has won buckets loads of chips! This is enough to repay Milky Holmes’ debts! Scarlett then makes a surprise announcement that there is going to be a wonderful show and needs Marine’s help. Once she goes up on stage, the roof opens and Marine is sucked up along with Scarlett into the ominous sky.

Episode 10
Noir explains Scarlett is now on the floating island that was once created by some super civilization. Scarlett has been strategically opening her casinos so that it could channel its power to this casino island to summon the floating island. There is a Levistone on that island with incredible luck that those who possess it will never have bad luck ever. Scarlett plans on ruling the world with it but to get that stone, you need incredible luck and who better than Marine has that. The catch is, in the process Marine’s psyche will be destroyed while Scarlett will be unharmed. But how are they going to get up there? Ann has a special dimensional hole inside her locket that will allow them to get there (the floating island is filled with flying sharks so it’s impossible to get close via plane). Ann reveals she is a guardian of that place and it is here duty to prevent any sort of awakening. Since a great effort of concentration of bonds is required to keep the hole open, Hercule, Nero and Cordelia stay back to let Sherlock, Miki, Noir and Ann float up. However Scarlett’s henchmen are here to break that concentration. Fear not. This is where Feathers comes in to help. Once on the floating island, Scarlett lets loose traps to keep the girls at bat. During a robot attack, Ann takes damage and it exposes her mechanical arm. Though, she can still function like normal. Once they reach the main room, Noir tries to convince her mother to let her find Levistone for her. However Crescendo the Element pops out from her. They deduce she has been attracted by Scarlett’s greed. Time to play a game. Sherlock and Scarlett engage in a Yugioh card game parody with nonsensical and crazy moves. Sherlock wins at the end but Scarlett continues attacking them. Shouldn’t Crescendo be back to them? They think Scarlett’s greed is so great that it is forcing to keep Crescendo by her side. Miki then uses a bold move to grab Crescendo away from Scarlett. Scarlett reverts to normal and Crescendo returns to Marine. Everybody leaves the island but Ann won’t. She will stay here and be on standby till her next mission. Sherlock is sad since they have already become friends. Ann says goodbye but Sherlock corrects her it should be see you again. Ann returns to her pod and goes into slumber mode while Sherlock with tears in her eyes holds Ann’s locket.

Episode 11
The media hounds Miki and ignores Marine. But something else bugs Marine. When Miki grabbed Crescendo, she noticed she used her Toys. Could it be? Because that phantom thief who stole Marine’s Elements popped up, Kokoro is upset that the media has such information and the police didn’t! My, slacking aren’t we? So she orders to do a search for all the people at the casino having Toys. Yeah. There are so many of them… Keiko stumbles upon Miki’s data and they see something… When Producer has a new song for Marine, she won’t sing it till she gets all her Elements back. Marine tells Milky Holmes about her mom who wrote the Song of Miracles. Though she passed away when she was 6 years old, it holds many memories. Milky Holmes suggests they look around places Marine went with her mom. So at the outskirts of a town where she used to live with her mom, Milky Holmes mistaken this landlady to be Marine’s mother! Weren’t they listening? Inside a closet, they see a scribble of Marine and her mom. Marine insists she didn’t draw that but they discover something shocking: Miki is also in that drawing. That is when Marine remembers Miki is a childhood friend and used to play a lot together. How could she have forgotten? Even more shocking news: Miki in a TV interview announces that she will be going solo and sing the Song of Miracles. So Marine returns to the city to confront Miki. Miki never said anything because Marine was a big star and hard to approach. Now that she remembers, Miki says the song belongs to them. Marine knows Miki is the one who used her Toys to steal her Elements. Miki admits her Toys is separation and uses her power on Marine to make her start back at square one again.

Miki is about to perform live on TV when Kokoro barges in to arrest her but is quickly restrained by the staff. Not even Milky Holmes can save the day. Who can then? Elements! How can this be? Although Miki broke their bonds once, Marine came back for them. Their bond has been revived and stronger than ever. Marine knows Miki has her final Element. After Miki transforms into her phantom thief form, out comes Amore. She is the one controlling Miki and the true perpetrator of everything. It all started when Marine and Miki first reunited. Amore hid inside Miki and controlled her. Amore believes that Song of Miracles is holding Marine back. This is the song that always got her back because Amore is the core of this song. As long as she has this song, she cannot overcome the obstacle before her and she wanted to set her free. Milky Holmes argues she is wrong because Marine never gave up. She is now much stronger than before. Marine proves that by singing Song of Miracles without any help. She thanks everybody for helping her. The Song of Miracles now does not belong to her alone. It belongs to everyone who loves it. After Marine and Miki reconcile, Amore notes she has matured and returns to her. This miracle snows down some light sparkles all over the world. Conveniently, Keiko uses her Toys to erase everyone’s memories so we are back at square one as they watch the live performance of Marine and Miki.

Episode 12
Miki has quit and with Marine making a comeback concert, lots of people are trying to book her to perform. Did Manager screw up and double booked her? Milky Holmes feels sad that their bodyguard job for Marine will soon be over. Don’t despair. She hasn’t forgotten about you dummies detectives. She sends them tickets to her concert. Kokoro is all geared up with all the stuffs to cheer on Marine. Only one problem: No ticket! Milky Holmes gets a call for a job that Pink Lovely Doom is on the loose. So they go chase her and I think they’ve got batteries lasting longer than the Energizer bunny since they run everywhere till Pink Lovely Doom feels Kokoro’s stress is gone and returns whatever counterfeit money plate to them. All that is left is Marine’s concert, right? If they don’t get another call for a job… Oh, the handphone rings… Trying to feign there is no such number? There is only one thing left to do: Milky Holmes, split up! So we have Sherlock chasing some piggy phantom thief, Cordelia helping an old man find his missing glasses in his mansion, Nero herding sheep and Hercule babysitting. Their job goes into overtime like Cordelia ending up cleaning the old guy’s mansion only to realize the glasses were on his head all along! Sherlock corners the phantom thief and her true identity is… Twenty! OMG! The pervert is back! Not just him. Stone River, Rat and Arsene too! Is Sherlock outnumbered? Her comrades finish their job in time to reunite and make this a fair fight. So we see the detectives and phantom thief duke it out as Marine concert gets underway. I don’t know how in a jam packed stadium, Marine can see that Milky Holmes didn’t turn up at their seats. Maybe she knows where they’ll be seating but do you know how big the stadium is? And Milky Holmes didn’t get the front seats… Milky Holmes’ battle has them take on giant Arsene (don’t even ask how this happen) and they combine their Toys to summon lightning to shrink her down to size (don’t even ask about this one too). Arsene is glad to see they have improved a little and decides to let them off for tonight (since Kokoro and the police are coming). But will Milky Holmes now make it for Marine’s concert? They thought it is over when they arrive but suddenly the place lights up again. Hey. Everybody waited for them?! Who are they? VIPs? Well, at least to Marine because she is thanking the super sleuths who helped her find what is most important to her. Wait a minute. Milky Holmes has a part to sing in Marine’s final song? Now guest artists, huh? And what better way to end it all with snippets of their past adventures together. How anti-climatic…

Elementary, My Dear Milky Holmes
Erm… Uhm… What… Well… Okay… If I had to sum up about this season in a couple of words, it would be toned down. Although Milky Holmes is generally silly but it seems they fare much better than in their previous seasons because they are not as dumb as they were when we first know them. I supposed we need to show how Milky Holmes have ‘grown up’ and graduated from their academy because you realize the setting isn’t in their Holmes Detective Academy. Teaming up with an idol to help recover her lost Elements may provide a little deviation from the usual formula of Milky Holmes cracking cases to catch phantom thieves or get back their Toys (the main goal in the first two seasons). However the format of Marine and the detectives going around to find Elements, meet different people, get into some trouble, get into some challenge, learn some valuable lesson (sort of) and having the Element coming back to Marine feels like a repetitive one. In fact, each episode almost felt like fillers although they are still connected. And that kind of ending… Must the most boring ever. Sing a song with an idol to close the season. Since when did Milky Holmes become a musical genre?

Sometimes I feel that because of how less funny it was, it sometimes makes the overall story and for each episode feeling somewhat forced and if I should say, a little boring. I mean, don’t you just feel the irony that the world’s best idol is only able to sing thanks to her little Elements? Sure, it is to showcase her ‘journey’ of learning some lessons in friendship, trust, love (and anything else you can add here) but I hardly doubt that those who watch this series are in for that kind of theme. We are here for the exaggerated nonsense that made this series so lovable in the first place. We know it was stupid or doesn’t make any sense but we loved it. Without all that, the toning down the comical stupidity in favour of something a little serious and soul searching and self discovery for the main character has proven to be a big mistake after all. The laughter is toned down and in a way feels forced. Yeah, I noticed I ‘laughed’ because it was supposed to be ‘funny’. Or so I think. Well, I definitely think it was better when the story had a piggy lard boy turned god trying to take over the world instead of a soul searching idol no matter how ridiculous the former was.

One of the biggest reasons that this season is very much toned down is Milky Holmes themselves. As I have said, they are still dummies but not in a way that they can be called retarded and useless anymore. It is with mixed feelings seeing them stray away from their usual behaviour as we once knew them. It is good to see them being more responsible and useful (cough, cough) now but on the other hand, they are less funny. That’s right. This season Milky Holmes did not make me laugh as mad as before. Although there is this supposedly running joke that Milky Holmes always makes the wrong deduction and like Sherlock quick to accuse the wrong culprit, it still doesn’t match to past season’s funniness. Get what I mean? They’re funny only because of my past perceptions and memories of them so when they do something silly even though it may not be funny, my natural reaction is to laugh.

I remember Nero was being such a very ‘spiteful’ character thanks to her greed and selfishness but this time around, it is good as nonexistent. Hercule was supposed to be the brains as I remembered it but she rarely displays any of that here. What about Cordelia breaking down and going into her fantasies? Nada. I don’t know, deep down I thought without all that, their charm is somewhat lost. It is like as though they are a different set of characters only using the Milky Holmes name and looking like them. Also, Milky Holmes seems to have gotten their Toys back although they rarely use it. Heck, Toys are hardly used here. Despite the final fight with Arsene has them displaying their Toys only once, it felt force because as though it is to remind us that they have such powers in the first place. Yeah well, like you girls said right at the end, I hope you all try harder on your next case next time. If there will be next time, that is.

Another factor could be the absence of Phantom Thief Empire. They are reduced to pathetic cameos. Without Arsene and her henchmen, somehow the fun has been reduced. Because no matter how disgusting a certain nipple erecting guy is, it is always never dull to see that pervert get full of himself (that includes stripping). I mean, Phantom Thief Empire was the one trying to bring out the best in Milky Holmes but it also brought out the worst in them. How would Milky Holmes get better (or worse) without them around? So with this season the loli detectives totting around the world with an idol, it feels this group of phantom thieves are sorely missed. I know they want new characters and storyline but something tells me Milky Holmes isn’t the same without Phantom Thief Empire. Therefore the final fight with them in the last episode feels forced just to remind us that they are still around. Or it could be to pass time because you don’t want to be bored if the entire episode is about Marine’s concert and that would be like stealing the limelight from Milky Holmes which is a big insult since this series is named after them. Even if we are surprised that they get a few more minutes of screen time seeing that they are missing for the big part of this season, we are certainly not amused. Like as though this forced appearance and fight is to satiate our nostalgia about them. Didn’t work.

Also greatly absent are the rest of the G4 members. Even worse than Phantom Thief Empire, it is like the producers decided to do away with Tsugiko, Hirano and Saku and ‘killed them off’ with unknown excuses why they don’t even bother to show up for work (maybe they can’t stand Kokoro anymore). Therefore our poor Kokoro is left to do all the work herself with Keiko. You can’t blame that loli police for being so stressed up and blowing her top all the time. Yeah. Kokoro is still amusing and funny in that sense. But I also guess that they don’t want to bore us with that running joke in previous seasons about her IQ and the gold mask whacking reaction each time Sherlock calls her Kokoro-chan. It is kept to a very minimum that if you have not watched previous seasons of Milky Holmes, you won’t really get it or think much about it. Those felt like just to bring up the nostalgia factor for us Milky Holmes fans. I’m not sure about this irony because remember in the OVA, Kokoro became an idol? Here, she seems to be fawning and drooling over Marine at one point as her biggest fan although she might be a secret idol Mayu without knowing it herself. Oh, did she forget? With Keiko around, very likely. Speaking of Keiko, her motives feel lacking rather than mysterious. I thought she was going to be the culprit or antagonist somehow but she’s just playing the observing role.

Other recurring characters feel okay and nothing much. Like Feathers who starred in their own spin-off and Milky Holmes played the supporting role, it is reversed in this season with the duo now acting out the supporting part for Milky Holmes. The case of I scratch your back and you scratch mine? In fact, many of the old characters make just cameo or don’t at all. Like Kobayashi and Kamaboko appearing just for a handful of seconds while Irene, Sonia and Lily (from Alternative) were greatly missing. Not even that bomb disposal unit, Poporo. Remember that Mori Arty villain? She made mysterious motives that made us question her goals even more. Where is she here? Don’t see her anywhere. Did they forget about this character or intentionally left her out? Perhaps it is a good thing that Mori Arty never appeared, otherwise we would be sceptically questioning the purpose of it all.

New characters do not impact much. Marine as the main character feels lacking in many ways. I guess in a way her sudden fall from stardom only shows how cruel and dog-eat-dog-world the idol business may be and then rise back to the top again once she has found enlightenment. Yeah well, whose show is this season supposed to be? I figure Miki resigned to atone for what she did to her best friend and somehow when she was the mastermind or at least co-culprit as the one responsible for Marine to lose her Elements, it didn’t really surprise me because if you want to do a good ‘detective’ show, the culprit at the end must be part of the casts we know, right? It wouldn’t be fair and ethical to throw in a new character that we wouldn’t know. But I didn’t guess it was her because I was thinking it might be Senna. Still remember this girl? No? Don’t blame you. I guess her character was just trolling.

Many of the other side characters just appear for that episode and nothing more is said about them once the plot moves on. Especially Marine’s Elements who just feel shallow. No great explanation as to explain why they are absorbed into a certain person and make their dark personality goes berserk. So it is puzzling when Elements that get absorbed to people very close to them most of the time like Miki and Nero, oddly how come they do not detect them in the first place? For those who got absorbed into others, how come they end up at far flung places like that Indian-like kingdom and a former one-hit wonder in the middle of the woods? Unless they were at Marine’s concert at that time but I doubt they were given the circumstances and everything. And it is odd that after losing a challenge, they return to Marine. That’s it about them. Yeah, we don’t even know why whatever power they have suddenly make their host go wild or their dark side, thus a lame excuse for some challenge that you will know will end in a predictable outcome.

At least the art and drawing remains pretty much the same in the first two seasons. Cute girls everywhere so I can’t see any reason to complain. Almost everything is bright and vivid. In any case, Milky Holmes themselves look much better than their cameo in Futari Wa Milky Holmes. Heck, more accurately they look like they should as before in the first two seasons. Backgrounds and sceneries are okay too and nothing too shabby. At least the chibi illustrations during the sponsor screens are still funny but the final end card illustration seems pretty good although they’re all sketched by the same person, though.

As the familiar casts are retained, new ones join in. The only one I could recognize was Ayako Kawasumi as Producer and Aoi Yuuki as Carol. The rest include Emi Nitta as Marine (Honoka in Love Live), Mari Nakatsu as Miki (Nanami in Sakurasou No Pet Na Kanojo), Ai Yamamoto as Manager (her debut and only role) and Asami Seto as Ann (Chihaya in Chihayafuru). I know it is a pretty long list considering the other minor characters that only appear for one episode and the rest of Elements but I’m just too lazy to list them all seeing the fact that I have lost my motivation due to my overall sentiments for this seasons. Hah! I’m taking after Milky Holmes’ laziness from previous seasons!

The same quartet behind Milky Holmes sing the opening theme for this season too. Milky-A-Go-Go has that familiar feel to all the Milky Holmes opening themes that you have heard thanks to its lively and cheerful feel. The ending theme is Tankyuu Dreaming by Emi Nitta and of course sounds very much like an idol song. Thanks to the idol theme of this season, there are lots of insert songs and on average, one per episode. Although some are fun to hear, unfortunately they don’t stick very long in my mind. Maybe it is a sign that they aren’t just as appealing?

It is with great despair to see that one of my all time favourite funny, wacky, zany, crazy series has turned out into something mediocre. So sad to see this series has been added to the statistics of sequels failing to live up to its predecessor. How I missed the ol’ days of Milky Holmes. I am not saying that this season sucks as it is still decent in many accounts. It is still okay on its own but it is the comparing with its previous seasons that really dragged it down. If you are an old Milky Holmes fan like me, it is only natural to expect sequels to be greater or at least on par with its previous works. If they ever do another season of this, I just hope they remember to go back to the basics. Yes, Milky Holmes. Remember elementary… Elementary, my dear Milky Holmes.

It isn’t over yet? Maybe this one will end it. This is the third instalment of Papa No Iukoto Wo Kikinasai OVA but this time the ‘stars’ of this episode won’t be a certain young uncle and his 3 nieces. In fact, you can say that they come from the stars! They were never featured prominently in any previous episodes before. Who you might guess? Why, it is no other than the girls’ parents, Yuri and Shingo! In the form of a ghost! OMG! I guess every parent who has departed early would always want to come down to check on how their kids are doing. I don’t know why or how God granted them this single day visit to do so and 4 years later after their demise. Well, better late than never.

A Spring With Special Visitors
Gosh, how time flies. Things have definitely changed within the last 4 years. So of course when they’re standing outside the gates and pressing the bell, nobody could actually see them and either Sora must be thinking some naughty kid is playing ding dong ditch or she must be hearing things. But as ghosts you don’t need to let your hosts open the door. You just walk through the walls! And so the parents see how their lovely kids are grown up and mature. They’re interacting well and fine with Yuuta. Yeah, they should be very proud parents. So after everyone leaves for school and work, time to check out their rooms. First stop, Sora’s room. Plain. Lots of books. Going to college, I guess. Good girl. C-cup bra size?! I guess Sora is at that age to have a boyfriend… NO WAY! Daddy doesn’t approve! In Miu’s room, they see lots of clothing sketches. They believe Miu has decided to become a fashion designer. Finally, Hina’s room. Lots of cute stuffs. Lots of photos of the family. And a heart-warming note of the fun times she spends with everyone and how good her uncle is and that she wants to marry someone like him. Why not him? You’ll see… So with the parents having their fill, is it time to go back? It’s never enough! They decide to go see how their girls are doing at school. They fawn over cute Hina in her PE class. As it is her turn to jump over the horse vault, she trips but did daddy give some divine intervention to make her perfectly land on her 2 feet?! Should be a perfect 10 score! They continue to observe Hina in class for the rest of the day (including getting into trouble for accidentally breaking the lamp during cleaning session – but there’s nothing they could do about it). Yeah, think about it. Doesn’t it feel weird to have a ghost watching and following you the entire day even though they are your parents?

Next, they visit Miu’s school and are shocked to see her on stage singing in a band! I don’t know, Miu sounds pretty much out of tune or rather tone deaf… Then it is Sora’s school and they see her more responsible now as opposed to being the bashful one. After school, a guy comes up to her to confess! Daddy does not approve! Turn him down! She apologizes she can’t. Yes! Because there is somebody else she already likes. SAY WHAT???!!! And no Shingo, that person is not you! Even more heart breaking is because Sora notes to herself that the person she likes is also going to get married! Oh daddy, if you’re alive now, you’d die of a heart attack. So I guess this means the parents can’t go back yet. So they go home and find somebody else in the house .Who could it be using the shower? It is Sasha (Shingo’s ex-wife and Miu’s mother) using the place like her own. She has also designed a wedding dress for Sora as per requested. It is revealed that Yuuta and Sora are really getting married! Oh my God! I suppose Shingo was desperate enough to go read Sora’s diary and it seems they have went through a lot of thinking to have come to this decision. Daddy is sad but understands. I don’t know how this is possible but I guess you can if you want because the parents go soak in the tub like they usually do. Can ghosts do that? When everyone is home, they hear Miu and Hina teasing Yuuta and Sora to kiss. They’re not going to rush it. Good news for the parents that they haven’t kissed before that too.

Whatever the case, the parents are of course worried for them. Even more worrying is how Hina is sick that night. If those 2 didn’t notice this, they don’t fit to marry each other. But surprise, Yuuta and Sora come in to cool Hina’s fever. Hina tells them she saw daddy and mommy. Must be in her dreams, right? The parents now feel assured the way they take care of Hina. The last stop is their own room in which it was left as it was. Like as though time has stopped here. That is when they see Yuuta and Sora coming in all dressed up as newlyweds. Sora isn’t sure why she wants to do this right now but she feels sad she can’t give thanks to their parents at their wedding. Get ready a box of tissues because this is going to be an emotional heartfelt thanks from both of them, thanking and praising how cool and good sister Yuri and daddy Shingo were when they were around. In short, they will always love them. At that moment, the parents push them together to hug and the duo felt like as though they were being hugged by them. When the sunrises, the parents are gone and they wonder if they were really there. Oh, you don’t know. They were right under your noses…

Watching Over You Always…
Sniff, sniff. Oh my. How fast everyone grow up these days. Everything just went by in a blink of an eye and before you know it, they’re already getting ready to marry. If you’re wondering if it is morally right for Sora to marry her uncle Yuuta, please bear in mind that they are actually not blood related in the first place (Sora and Miu are from Shingo’s previous marriages). So perhaps this is the best way to end it (because it was always greatly hinting that Sora the tsundere had feelings for Yuuta) and that includes the series. Assuming that the series ends of course.

So like a time lapse fast forward, despite we do not see anything much Yuuta and the girls, but from what we can see is that they have come a long way and matured greatly. I suppose the girls now have much longer hair is to show proof that time really indeed has passed. And Yuuta has this mature look of a responsible adult instead of some poor college kid. That is why I believe Yuri and Shingo can rest easily when they go back to heaven. Don’t have to make second trips to check on them again in the next 4 years? I am sure they want to be there physically for them every single second. It’s just sad they can’t. Time is a great healer of such wounds. It is not like the kids have forgotten about them either but they have come to terms and accept reality as it is now. No use continuing to wallow in depression for 4 years, right?

Seeing the importance of this OVA, I guess other side characters were left out. For instance, that oddball Raika but I suppose with already 4 years passed, those characters would already have graduated from college. There goes the teasing/love triangle whatsoever. Interesting enough to ponder, now that Miu and Hina are grown up, would that lolicon maniac Sako still love them? Will he classify them as ‘grandma’ like how he always did for Sora? Ah, it would be nice to know but his absence here I would pretty much assume that he has got over them. This also means Nimura doesn’t have to be around to protect those lolis from Sako’s perversion. I do remember Nimura has a soft spot for Miu or may that too have come to passed. The strict landlord Sawako and the next door neighbour who is a seiyuu Kurumi too are not seen anywhere. This OVA is ‘too important’ for the likes of these supporting characters to appear ;p.

This OVA adds lots of heart-warming moments and even better for those who have watched the previous episodes and are fans of the series. The final moments would surely pull your heart strings and for anyone without parents since young would definitely connect and relate to the emotions that are shown here. So this OVA teaches us a lot of things. To be happy with what you have. To be thankful with what you have. To take things in their stride. Things may not work out well and it may be tough initially but it could be a blessing in disguise like in this case we see how everyone turned out so beautifully well that it would bring envy to families who still have their parents around. Wherever your parents are, they will always be proud of their children no matter what. So does this mean I need to get married now to appease my parents before it is too late? But even more disturbing to think that if it is possible for late parents to come down and visit and only watch their kids for a day, doesn’t it feel like stalking, ghost version? The feeling that someone is watching you but there is really nobody there. Be wary… They might catch you in the act. Can’t watch porn and fap in peace…

Black Bullet

April 25, 2015

Are you the kind of guy craving for action and fights? But at the same time do you have a thing for lolis? Yes. It might seem contradicting or just freaking weird that an action crazy macho guy teaming up with a loli to fight and save humanity from alien bugs. What kind of a sick perverted story is this?! Well, don’t hold your breath now because it really did happen. At least in Black Bullet. Hah. You thought I was going to mention about some perverted lolicon series, are you? Well, this series isn’t some ecchi loli show but filled with action and sci-fi elements that would make most of us prefer to go back to our safer loli genres of seeing them do cute things and go “Awwww…” and cuddle them every time that happens. Otherwise, prepare to face the grim dystopian future whereby a certain group of lolis are hated and discriminated by the public in general but ironically are the ones who hold the key to save humanity from invading alien bugs. Yeah. Why didn’t the bugs just wipe out humanity in the first place and save us all this loli discriminating trouble. The world can go to hell and burn in it for all we care if you hate lolis that much!

Episode 1
When Rentarou Satomi was young, he had a close encounter with a Gastrea when it attacked the refugee camp. He heard a voice telling him to survive if he doesn’t want to die. Well, duh! Ten years later, he is now a Civil Security officer heading to an apartment believed to have confirmed Gastrea. Apparently some army guys didn’t want him to hog the glory so they went in first and paid the price. However their massacre wasn’t due to Gastrea but this masked man, Kagetane Hiruko. They fight but Rentarou is no match. He leaves after getting a call but tells Rentarou that he will be the one to destroy this world. Rentarou’s loli partner, Enju Aihara (also self proclaimed future fiancée) is furious that she fell off his bicycle and he didn’t have the decency to pick her up. Along the way she meets a guy infected with Gastrea seeking for help. She can only look with pity because it is already at an advanced stage beyond help. A stage one spider model Gastrea bursts out from its host’s body. Rentarou arrives in time to fire his special bullets made out of Varanium, the only material that could defeat those beings and prevent their regeneration. As explained, Enju is an Initiator, those born to fight Gastrea while Rentarou is a Promoter, those in charge of keeping Initiators under control. The duo leave the messy clean up to the detectives since they need to rush for some time limited cheap sale. Thanks to that, their agency boss, Kisara Tendou is furious that because of that, they lost their reward and compensation from the police. Uhm, maybe she just felt left out that she wanted to join in the sale too. Business is slow because their office is located in a shady area. Can’t complain if the rent is cheap, right? When Kisara brings up the subject if he still thinks about his parents, he becomes upset. He is still sensitive all these years when people talk about it because they died in that war.

Rentarou goes to see Sumire Muroto who is a Gastrea researcher. And a quirky person. Are scientists all like that? She chides him for being lazy because he left the Varanium bullet shells he shot at the scene. She hints if he doesn’t buck up, Kisara won’t look his way. On to serious business, they discuss about the source of infection. Since there are no reports, there will be more victims at this rate. Sumire also explains how the Gastrea virus rewrites DNA in an irregular way. That’s why it can become strong and faster in a short time. Back home, Enju is probably trying to train herself to become his future wife. It’s not play time yet as Rentarou injects her daily shot. After meal, it must be a tired day so he instantly goes to bed. Active loli not happy… Get the hint! She won’t let him sleep yet… Even when morning comes, Enju can still talk dirty trying to corrupt his mind or something. At least they can still laugh and be happy. All Rentarou want is for Enju to lead a normal life. He gives her a lift to school. Then he explains to us Gastrea virus normally spread among humans through bodily fluids. But there are rare cases they enter the mouth of a pregnant woman and infecting their child. They become Cursed Children. All of them are born girls and have red eyes. Although the virus is inside their body, some inhibiting factor makes its corrosion at a slower rate. However there are many who refuse to recognize such children as human. Ten years ago when a parasitic life form from space called Gastrea infected humanity and nearly caused extinction, humans surround themselves within giant monoliths made out of Varanium and they managed to survive staying within it. Now humanity is gradually arming themselves to fight back against Gastrea. At the core of it are Enju and the Cursed Children, the Initiators. Peace is maintained thanks to those girls inheriting Gastrea’s regeneration and physical abilities. They might be hated and a curse Gastrea put upon humanity. However they are mankind’s last hope against them. In an abandoned section of Tokyo, a large group of Cursed Children watches longingly.

Episode 2
All the Promoters and Initiators are called to an important meeting. This hulk Promoter, Shougen Ikuma doesn’t like the young punk Rentarou is and they almost fight if not for Shougen’s boss, Mikajima telling him to stop or else. The meeting is initiated when Seitenshi, the ruler of Tokyo appears on the screen. Beside her is Kikunojo Tendou, Kisara’s grandpa and Rentarou’s adoptive father after his parents died. Seitenshi has 2 missions for everyone. Find the source of the Gastrea infection and bring back a case. As a matter of privacy, she will not mention its contents. Kisara is of course suspicious. Why call all the top pairs to hunt down for such a case. It must contain something very dangerous, right? Suddenly Kagetane is heard giving his opinion. How did he sneak inside? He introduces his daughter, Kohina who is also his Initiator. He makes known his intention that he is joining the race to retrieve the case which has Inheritance of the Seven Stars. He makes a bet with them. If he gets it first, they will all pay with their lives. Everyone attacks him but their bullets cannot penetrate his barrier. Everyone starts panicking when Kagetane reveals himself to be from the 787th Mechanization Special Unit of SDF eastern division, an Anti-Gastrea unit and New Humanity Creation Plan survivor. He returns the bullets to everyone, killing many of them. After he leaves, Seitenshi adds another condition that they must retrieve the case before Kagetane for its contents can destroy the monoliths. It is something meant to be sealed away. While Rentarou and Enju are walking through the shopping district, they see a Cursed Child being chased and beaten for stealing. Enju wanted to help but Rentarou stops her. She becomes upset he didn’t save her and calls him a liar that despite he claims to be a champion of justice, he cannot do anything. Of course this invokes his inner conscience so he goes off to save that child. But to his horror, he sees the authorities shooting and killing her at some deserted building. Luckily she is still breathing so he sends her to the doctor and assures he will pay her bill. Living expenses are going to be tight this month.

On his way back, he encounters Kagetane and Kohina. Father orders daughter to chop off his arm. Luckily Enju is here to aid him but Kagetane will not allow bloodthirsty Kohina to kill her. Kagetane offers Rentarou to join forces with him by explaining the discrimination and double standards of this area. He has seen it with his own eyes. Humanity should just face extinction and greater beings like them shall become the next rulers. Rentarou rejects his proposal. Kagetane warns he will face reality soon enough. Visit Enju’s school tomorrow and he shall see. When he does, it seems rumours that Enju is a Cursed Child has spread. Everyone is keeping away from her so much so Enju ran away. Of course he is upset with everything but there is nothing much he can do but go find her. He makes his way to the sewers of the underground district. The Cursed Children may not know her but they think the elder who takes care of them may know. Matsuzaki believes in teaching these girls how to control their emotions so their red eyes won’t show so they can live in society. As for Enju, he hasn’t seen her. The thinks his Initiator ran out on him and would be better to get a replacement. Just contact IISO and make a new contract with a new Initiator. Because to many Promoters, Initiators are just tools for fighting. Oh. He might just said the taboo word. Rentarou raises his voice that his relationship with Enju has nothing to do with Initiator or Promoter. He remembers her heart was closed when they first met. But once the ice was broken, they became like how you see they were. They’re always together. He leaves to continue his search. Matsuzaki hints to hidden Enju nearby that she is lucky to have a nice man like him. Sure you want to let him go?

Episode 3
Sumire must have fallen asleep while listening to Rentarou’s ‘boring’ complaints about the discrimination. She talks about some believing Gastrea is like God’s Messengers trying to clean up humanity responsible for the world’s resources deterioration and destruction. Rentarou is adamant Enju is human but is told if she knows it herself as Cursed Children are abandoned children who never knew their parents. The world views them as scorn. Who are going to teach and guide them? At least they are a family. Rentarou receives a call from the teacher that Enju showed up at school. All the kids are trying to keep her away. Rentarou will have her change school but she is not willing as she has made so many friends. Well, these aren’t her friends anymore. Rentarou and Enju are called for another mission. This time the source of the infection. In the midst of the dense jungle, there is a spider model Gastrea. Enju quickly fights and defeats it as proof she protected her school friends. As they hug, Rentarou assures he will always be by her side even if the entire world doesn’t accept her. Before they could retrieve the case, Kagetane and Kohina attack them. Rentarou gets a taste of his special crushing move. He forces Enju to run away although she promises to come back with help. Kohina stabs Rentarou before Kagetane shoots him. Luckily our hero can’t die. He is alive in hospital with Kisara by his side. Enju sleeping by his side. Better thank her for bringing him here. Kisara reports Kagetane has taken the case which contains materials to summon stage five Gastrea. When Gastrea reaches that stage, not even Varanium could stop them and it will be the end of humanity. Kagetane has escaped to outside the barrier and believed to be trying to summon it.

Seitenshi personally calls Rentarou to inform him that she would like him to participate in a mission to hunt down Kagetane. Sumire drops lots of weapon gifts for him. He mentions about that dream he had while unconscious. Sumire operated on him 10 years ago and gave him a choice. Sumire doesn’t expect to be forgiven but Rentarou says he never once thought of resenting her. Rentarou and Enju are dropped into the thick jungle and barely escape from a rampaging Gastrea. They see a hut nearby but find Kayo Senju alone. She is Shougen’s Initiator. Noticing her hand is wounded, he bandages it. Why is Enju jealous? Things can get complicated when another woman is involved. Enough said. Kayo explains her team is supposed to be on the vanguard but because Shougen is the action type, he went ahead first. They encountered a Gastrea and without thinking she set off explosives and that’s when they got separated. Although she got injected by Gastrea’s fluid, it is a very small amount and no need to worry or any corrosion. Kayo is touched Rentarou is worried about her and feels envious of Enju. She adds that she was made to kill when Shougen ordered her to do so to another pair because he won’t let any other pair have the reward for killing Kagetane. She was scared. Rentarou tells her that nothing is scarier about getting used to killing. When you kill someone and won’t be punished, that’s when people forget all about punishment. Kayo notes his mysterious eyes. Kind but yet scary. However she wants to believe in his words although she can think of many ways to counter it. Shougen calls Kayo to meet up because he has found Kagetane. As they make their way, they see the Stairway to Heaven, a weapon of mass destruction and symbol of the Stolen Generation’s hatred. She thinks what is going on right now is an attempt to revive it.

Episode 4
Kayo fights the dozens of Gastrea in the forest for the duo to advance. When they arrive, they see slaughtered Civil Servants. Shougen seems to be panicking without his sword. Oh, it’s right there. In his back. Thank Kagetane and Kohina for the massacre. Meanwhile Seitenshi has called Kisara for her help. She believes Rentarou will win. For sure. How can she? 10 years ago when Gastrea killed her parents, Rentarou protected her and cost him his right arm, right leg and left eye. On the verge of death, he was taken to Sumire who operated on him. Those artificial limbs are made from Varanium. He is able to get a little edge over Kagetane with this and reintroduces himself. Looks like Rentarou is another survivor of the New Humanity Creation Plan. As they fight, Kagetane offers him to join him once more. Another rejection. In that case, die. Rentarou is bleeding like mad and remembers the AGV experimental drugs created from Gastrea virus that Sumire gave him. It gives human regenerative abilities but there is a 20% chance he will turn into Gastrea. He stabs all the syringes into his gut!!! Don’t care all about that when he can’t stand to see Enju crying, can’t he? He regenerates and powers up so badass that he pounds Kagetane like no tomorrow. He even lands his finishing drop kick blow, cracking his mask and plunging him into the depths of the ocean. Victory! Kohina has become in shock state that she is no longer a threat. However Kisara calls as there is now a bigger problem. A stage five Gastrea has appeared. The only way to defeat it is to use Stairway to Heaven. Approved by Seitenshi. And Rentarou is going to do it. I’m not sure about that technical mumbo-jumbo about this railgun module shooting some Varanium that not even stage 5 Gastrea can survive. But heck, what choice do they have left?

And you think it is easy just activating it? Here comes the load of problems. It always happens at such crucial moments. There are no Varanium bullets in the chamber, some coolant is leaked and the magnetic fields mean it cannot be remotely controlled. Just great. Rentarou sacrifices his right arm to load as the bullet. Now he has to fire the damn thing accurately. He is reluctant for fear he might miss and hit the city but Enju tells him you won’t know if you don’t try. Who else is going to save the world? If words of a loli can’t motivate you, I don’t know what can. He aims. He fires. He hits! Victory! Well, who could miss it because that Gastrea was freaking huge, right? Later Rentarou goes back down to the forest to see Gastrea bodies around. Kayo defeated them but her corrosion rate is above 50%. She has not much time left. She didn’t run away because she didn’t want him to die for he was the one who acknowledged her existence. She is very grateful and wants to die as a human. Knowing he has not many friends, she’ll be one. Hope you’ll save the world. Reluctantly, he pulls the trigger. Back in Tokyo, he confronts Kikunojo. He knows information was leaked by some minister who just hanged himself in his cell. That minister is Kikunojo’s subordinate. Rentarou accuses him of trying to promote discrimination when Seitenshi is trying to pass an equality law for Cursed Children. Heck, he summoned a stage 5 Gastrea to stop the passing of this law! Kikunojo could not forget how Gastrea took his wife’s life. He views them as destroyer of mankind. Rentarou views them as humans. He won’t kill him as gratitude for saving his life 10 years ago. Later he confronts Seitenshi. He has peaked into the case and saw parts of a tricycle inside. How can this bring world destruction? What is Gastrea anyway? She cannot say. She hints that if the hierarchy were to improve, Civil Security pairs would be given special rights like top secret information. She wants them to rise through the ranks and when they do, he’ll find out the reason he was born and who he truly is. Enju is happy to hear that her corrosion rate remains at 24%. But you know how good poker face and liar he is. It has dramatically increased to 42%.

Episode 5
Kisara says there is a bodyguard job for Rentarou. Seitenshi picked him herself for the job since Kikunojo is temporarily overseas. Seitenshi explains the details of the job. She would like him to station himself beside him for the rest of the informal meeting. But she already has bodyguards, so why hire him? I think I know… Anyway he is introduced to them and the head, Takuto Yasuwaki. Rentarou isn’t on friendly terms and won’t shake his hands. Because he is only here to listen to the job details and hasn’t agreed to do it. Later Yasuwaki and his men corner him in the toilet. He wants him to not take the job as the spot next to Seitenshi belongs to him. Rentarou doesn’t take orders from him. Yasuwaki orders his men to break his limbs but he fights back. They have to flee when the guard heard gunshots. Yasuwaki is so mad probably because Rentarou’s bullet scratched his pretty face. He’ll kill him. And like the rebellious person he is, Rentarou agrees to take on the job. On his way out, he sees several men trying to bully a loli! WTF?! Can’t let a girl whose bicycle run over your toes go? They flee when Rentarou flashes his Civil Security badge. Tina Sprout is impressed. He is her superhero. Oh no. I have a bad feeling about this… He notices her taking caffeine as it is hard for her to stay awake in the day. She trolls with him about the things she did this morning and he knows she is lying. Her best reply: Why, he knows her better than herself! More trolling when she calls his number he gave her just to confirm he isn’t lying and that she actually knows where she lives. Later Tina gets a call from her master and her mission is to assassinate Seitenshi. That night she puts on her best dress and getting stuffs ready. The policeman doesn’t think a young girl should be out alone by herself. Tina’s master tells her to kill him. Well, the very wrecked police car says it all…

Back home, Miori Shiba collapses in front of Rentarou’s door due to her cold. This is followed by Kisara who is hungry. Rentarou knows this is trouble because both these girls hate each other! I can see what this is coming to. Miori is the daughter of a large scale weapons company president who supplies Varanium bullets. Miori begins her sarcasm as Kisara tries to ignore. But when Miori starts getting flirty and that Rentarou belongs to her, time to settle this sh*t. Because tonight’s dinner lacks some delicious seasoning: Miori’s blood. And so the catfight begins as Rentarou moves his table aside so as not to waste food. Good move. But goodbye his rental deposit. Rentarou escorts Seitenshi to see President Sougen Saitake. He is the area’s head and among the 5 area heads who united their respective areas after the Gastrea war, Saitake is the most dangerous of them all. In the meeting, Saitake blames Rentarou for destroying the railgun module as he planned to send it up to the moon. Seems his target isn’t just Gastrea. He has this vision that after Gastrea is eliminated, a new leader of the new world is needed. His goal is that and will get all the power he wants and eliminate those in the way. He believes his will is Japan’s and that Japan’s will is his. Well, he didn’t say he was God, right? Seitenshi is of course depressed but praises Rentarou for not yielding to him. Because Japan produces the most Varanium thanks to its archipelago of volcanic islands, he believes Saitake is supplying that person with Varanium to get money and weapons. She wants Rentarou to continuously be her bodyguard as this area is not safe and can foresee high ranking assassinations. She wants to be the embodiment of peace and show that she is not just talk. When Enju wakes up, she has a bad feeling. True enough, Rentarou protects Seitenshi from a sniper’s fire. Enju deflects another shot as the bodyguards escort her into a building. Rentarou can sense the enemy is gone and wonder who that person is. Because we all know she is Tina. She reports her failure to her master but will get the job done. Since it was too far, she couldn’t see the skilled bodyguard’s face that protected Seitenshi. I’m sure she’ll do soon.

Episode 6
I don’t know if Rentarou has got a new loli pet because he is giving her food. And because she is so clumsy, he couldn’t stand her spilling anymore food and feeds her. Yup. She loves it. Enough to make her say she loves him because nobody has been this kind to her ever since her parents died. A call ends their meeting. Her master has a mission for her: Kill Kisara. If you’re wondering why Kisara is armed to her teeth, she’s not going to fight Gastrea. She’s going to neutralize Miori! She won’t get her chance since Miori takes Rentarou into her place and warns any damages will be billed to her company. Miori has analyzed the sniping incident but still cannot identify the sniper. He pleads for her help to research on Saitake. And this is where the flirting begins… I guess Kisara couldn’t take it anymore. Bill or no bill, she’s going to kill that woman. But she is left speechless when Miori put words into Rentarou’s mouth that he would join her company if she offered herself to him. Sumire had a good laugh hearing this. Why on earth did he tell her this in the first place? Sumire talks about the other prodigies in charge of the New Humanity Creation Plan. Aside from her, there is one from Australia, America and Germany. The plan is to create mechanized soldiers to fight Gastrea but after realizing the high extent of Cursed Children’s fighting abilities, the project was scraped. Many of the mechanized soldiers were relieved of their duties and became Promoters. Rentarou already defeated a mechanized soldier under the German prodigy: Kagetane.

Tina barges into Kisara’s office and starts making Swiss cheese out of the place. Kisara fights back but loses. She notices Tina’s hands shaking. Is she afraid to kill? As Tina strangles her, Kisara is calling out Rentarou’s name to save her. And like a true hero, here he is. Imagine their shock and disappointment when they realize each other’s identity. Big irony, isn’t it? The standoff ends with Tina escaping. Kisara is treated at the hospital. And all that talk about vengeance and pain suddenly turns into something flirty. She ‘learnt’ something by ‘observing’ Miori and wants Rentarou to hold her hand. This is what she learnt? But she’s already so embarrassed that she could die. It isn’t that Rentarou turned into a pervert and starts groping her boobs. It’s Enju. Rentarou continues his bodyguard job on Seitenshi. He is very sure Saitake is behind this attack. Even so, there is no possible reason for Seitenshi to just cancel this meeting. Rentarou is mad. He didn’t take up this job to die for her. He’ll protect her. Definitely. As she gets out of the car, Yasuwaki is b*tching about the low end car she has to travel. They had to switch for diversion. Can’t you at least understand that? Suddenly Rentarou hears a familiar sound. It’s going to be a sniper attack. Get down! After a few shots, Rentarou gets hit in the arm protecting her. Enju goes off alone, confident she can catch Tina and take her down. But after she leaves, Seitenshi realizes the enemy’s name and does her research to reveal Tina is one of the mechanized soldiers and a high ranking one. In short, if Enju fights her alone, she will be killed. Call her back now! I hope the phone is working. It is. Hello? Hello? No answer. It could only mean one thing… Tina picked up that call. More devastation for Rentarou…

Episode 7
Enju is in ICU and won’t awake at least for any 2 days. Worse, Seitenshi is scheduled to meet Saitake for another meeting tomorrow. Rentarou can’t take it anymore and collapses. Lucky for him, Kisara is there to catch him. Is this how she would like to catch her guy? If things aren’t getting bad enough, here comes Yasuwaki rubbing into Rentarou’s face about his new protection plan that doesn’t involve him. Rentarou doesn’t give a damn and threatens him to come up with a false plan and leak it because he will still be protecting Seitenshi whether he likes it or not. Rentarou does his simulated training and thanks to some Varanium implant in his eye, he sees worldly movements slower than they should and thus his lightning speed reflex. Although his power level is at 2200%, it is a far cry from Enju’s 8600% which is way below than Tina’s 12900%! Holy sh*t! What kind of power level is that?! Tina’s non-killing action weighs heavily on Rentarou’s mind. He thinks she is trying to avoid killing as much as possible since she could have easily killed her targets. Tina receives info about the security plan from her master, Ayn Rand who is the American prodigy for the New Humanity Creation Plan. Tina senses something wrong in the plan because there is a spot in the route as though it was intentional for a perfect shot. Rand tells her Rentarou and Enju are still alive and warns if she fails her mission, she will commit suicide. Tina even gives Rentarou a courtesy call to end this. You won’t know if you don’t try.

Rentarou enters the building and fights off floating ‘eyeballs’ that serve as eyes for Tina to remotely control various heavy machine guns situated at certain points of the building. Eventually it comes down to man versus loli. Unfortunately Rentarou lost. But his luck changes when Enju’s face flashes before his mind. His misfired flash grenade activates and this temporarily blinds Tina (since she has night visions, it is very blinding). Now it is Rentarou’s turn for some loli abuse as he hammers her down the floors. She wants him to finish her as she doesn’t want her body which is filled with technology to be taken alive. However he won’t kill her. Because she saved Enju. So thank you. As he carries her out and will try to plead for a lenient sentence, Tina thinks she has lost her reason of existence (she only exists to fight). She wants him to take responsibility. It all comes down to this, huh? Maybe Rentarou doesn’t have to because Tina is shot in the heart! By Yasuwaki! After guiding Seitenshi safely to her place, he is here on his own to take care of things. He is going to find out how many ordinary lead bullets will take to kill a Cursed Child and see Rentarou’s distressed face. Suddenly here comes Seitenshi. Wasn’t she supposed to be at the meeting? Well, after hearing Yasuwaki acting on his own, she stepped out of the meeting early. As she is indebted to Rentarou, she asks him what he wants. Power. The power to protect. She raises his rank to 300. Now he can have access to top rank classified information and ranks hire than Yasuwaki. Now this guy is scared. He should be. Because Rentarou shoots off a finger of his! And warns never to come near Tina again. Ever. A week later, Saitake went home upset after feeling abandoned at the meeting. Rentarou couldn’t find any connection with Saitake and Rand. Tina is under Seitenshi’s care and under interrogation. But he’ll get a pleasant surprise when he returns to office. Tina is working as an office assistant! Kisara found her too cute to resist and hired her. Hey, even Enju loves her. Ironically, they almost got killed by this loli. Rentarou’s headache just turned up a notch and he doesn’t want to take responsibility for this. Aha! What did he say about responsibility over Tina?!

Episode 8
Rentarou agrees to be the teacher for Matsuzaki’s lolis. Boy, they are an enthusiastic bunch asking lots of questions. Nothing to do with the syllabus, though. They’re asking about Rentarou’s marriage to Enju, Kisara’s big boobs, if she is dating Rentarou, etc. Since she denies everything, it is a big boost for Enju. Oh yeah. But Seitenshi has urgent news. A stage four Gastrea called Aldebaran has destroyed a monolith. Another one is found to be injected with some Varanium corroding fluid and will be destroyed in 6 days. Construction of the monolith has begun but it will take 9 days. According to their analysis, 2000 Gastrea outside will flood and destroy Tokyo by then. This information is withheld from the public to prevent panic. She wants Rentarou to form an adjuvant, a squad system with a team of Civil Security agents working with JASDF. During the time the monolith is destroyed and the new one created, there will be a big battle. They must fight to prevent every Gastrea from coming in. This fight will decide the fate of Tokyo. That night when Tina can’t sleep, she talks to Rentarou and knows about the monoliths. She also mentions the old her as died in a battle with him. With this new life, it is all his to do whatever he wants. He explains he formed an agency with Kisara a year ago because of his hatred for Gastrea. But when he first saw Enju’s eyes, it was the eyes of those being betrayed by humans so many times that it was so much colder than theirs. So he changed. Enju changed. Then Kisara changed. Next morning when Kisara is here to pick Tina up, that loli crawls out from his lower half. With her ambiguous words that ‘last night was fun’ and ‘she learnt new things’, Kisara cannot resist calling the cops and Enju is devastated she beat her to it. And what the hell is this Tina night version?! All a big misunderstanding, don’t you agree?

News that the leader of the movement who wants to expel Cursed Children is killed. This will make the new Gastrea law impossible to pass now. Rentarou takes Tina out to the city and she treats it like a date. Gotta have fun, right? They see a blind Cursed Child begging for money. Rentarou is curious that she shouldn’t have any illness but it seems she pour lead into her eyes because her mom hates those red eyes. Rentarou doesn’t want her to come around here for a few days (because anti-Cursed Children protest is gaining momentum) and gives her some cold hard cash. Rentarou then begins his adjuvant recruiting spree. He goes to see Tamaki Katagiri but his Initiator, Yuzuki doesn’t like this pervert and starts insulting him. Anyway Rentarou reveals the top secret info and brings shock to Katagiri. It is not the money anymore. So won’t he fight for Rentarou’s sake? Since he won’t work for those weaker than he is, the only way is to fight. Needless to say when Rentarou gets serious, he wins. Yuzuki might be moving around like a fly as opposed to Tina just standing there. After her analysis, a single move is just what she needs to defeat her. Yuzuki is frustrated but with Tina humble in victory, Yuzuki starts loving her and wants to marry her! With that, Katagiri joins Rentarou.

Episode 9
Rentarou brings Tina to see Sumire. Tina mentions that a handful of people will come after her and she doesn’t want to inconvenience them. Rentarou tells her that they are not so weak that she needs to worry about it. Sumire’s translation: She is vital in his loli harem programme. For real?! Later Rentarou and Sumire discuss their different approach in changing the world. A world where people don’t have to wake up in fear of Gastrea. Sumire then shows him some data that he got with his level. It is believed that the records of Gastrea are supposed to be destroyed but here they are. It means somebody is trying to conceal them. Kisara interrupts to tell him to watch the news. Since the weakening of the monolith is all over the news, Seitenshi is holding an emergency press conference to quell the panic but the press grill her about knowing such information beforehand. Rentarou and Enju go around searching for more members for their adjuvant. Either they are very unsuitable or have joined other teams. They see a dead Civil Servant by the tracks and nearby a fight is about to erupt. Rentarou recognizes Shouma Nagisawa and his Initiator, Midori Fuse. Shouma easily defeats the rowdy challenger. Shouma hasn’t forgotten about Rentarou. In fact, Shouma was Rentarou’s senior back at the Tendou dojo but one day suddenly left for no reason. The answer is simple. He felt he was not up to it. Shouma has heard of Rentarou’s achievements recently and is more than happy to join his team. Although 3 pairs is the minimum required for a team, Rentarou feels he wants 5 pairs to cover all blind spots and the maximum he can direct. Well, they don’t need to start looking because Kisara is going to join them with Tina as her Initiator. Although Tina’s rank was revoked, Kisara personally pleaded to Seitenshi to have it reinstated. It took a while for Kisara to realize Shouma is here but Rentarou takes her away because he doesn’t want her to risk her health fighting. Everyone is called to assemble by the commander, Nagamasa Gado. He revs up everyone about protecting this area. But Rentarou throws him a question during Q&A. Their distance between camp and the battle is quite far. As they won’t act till they only get a call from the army, how sure is he that they will be called? Shouldn’t they move closer to the action and respond faster to the military’s call? I don’t think it got answered but Rentarou and Kisara have another round talking to each other, sorting out their feelings. Kisara wants him to abandon her if she ever gets in the way. Of course you know he can’t do that. And what seems to look like a confession scene from Rentarou, it is unceremoniously interrupted by the rest who were watching…

Episode 10
Even in busy times, Rentarou can still conduct classes. He has them write what they want to be in the future. I should have seen this coming. Enju’s answer… To marry Rentarou and kiss him. Gee, Tina’s answer is pretty much to same too. Rentarou is kind enough to have a field trip for the girls. They feel sad they won’t be around for the next festival so he assures them that they will be fighting and protecting them. The girls are pleased and pass him. They even admit some want to marry him! Oh God. The rivalry just went up a few notches. That night, Kisara brings Rentarou to the monolith. It is so brittle that touching it is enough to break. They wonder why this monolith is particularly targeted by Aldebaran. Maybe it is weak and needs rest after injecting such corrosive fluid. Still, Kisara will do some investigation on it. With a romantic moment to spare, Kisara has Rentarou lie next to her. He didn’t have the guts to hold her hand till she mentions about her fear that her happiness now will end one day. He assures he will protect her and they are not going anywhere. Next day, Rentarou sees the blind girl being harassed by the public. He uses his authority to chase them away. When results of Kisara’s investigation return, she is not pleased and burns it. Rentarou picks up what is left and reads this monolith was built at the end of the Gastrea war on orders by Kazumitsu, Kisara’s brother. As Rentarou and Enju leave for yet another class, they are surprised to see police barricading the place. The area has been bombed (believed to be by people who have a grudge against Cursed Children). Rentarou identifies all the dead bodies of his students at the morgue. Enju remains stubborn to go see them but is left screaming and crying. Rentarou becomes depressed. Disillusioned. Angry. A call from Kisara to wake him up. She tells him they are Civil Servants and must serve justice. If they manage to save Tokyo, it might help change hatred and people’s thinking even if it is little. They are fighting for that change and even if this job stinks, it is worth fighting for. Just then, the monolith collapses. A day early, huh? Well, nobody took into account the wind conditions. Rentarou picks up Enju. She is totally like a zombie but has to pick herself up to go fight.

Episode 11
The JASDF seems to be winning. Or are they? Big explosions. Tanks being thrown and the swarm of invading Gastrea. Not good. Rentarou realizes certain Gastrea creatures are going to flank them and they will be annihilated this way. Even if it means disobeying direct orders, they head to destroy that deployment. When they return, they see teams being slaughtered by what it is called a Spear of Light. Then there’s Aldebaran. However it seems to command the other Gastrea to retreat. The casualties are high. It is even worse to think that those killed by Gastrea will turn into one of them and they’ll be fighting them again. After doing what they can to nurse the wounded, Rentarou’s adjuvant discuss about the effects of those who survived the Spear of Light. There are hints of mercury in it. Tina’s floating eyeballs detected a very huge Gastrea shooting that light kilometres away. Rentarou is summoned by Gado who lost a leg during the fight (he claims he let them have it). Rentarou deduces that some sort of pheromones is making the Gastrea strong. The JASDF were winning and then suddenly they lost. Gastrea formed a wall trying to protect Aldebaran when it was hurt. So if they destroy Aldebaran, they destroy the Gastrea pack. Gado lets him know something. There is no way to kill Aldebaran. It is immortal. He was there, very sure his Varanium blade sliced into its core and heart but he saw it regenerate. Also, the Spear of Light Gastrea as they nickname it Pleiades is also a great threat like Aldebaran. They must destroy it too. Which brings him to this ‘difficult’ decision. Because Rentarou’s team disobeyed direct orders, his adjuvant is disbanded and he will face capital punishment. His mission is to infiltrate enemy territory and destroy Pleiades alone. His team will be spared then. It’s like a suicide mission, no? No choice, Rentarou leaves that night and Kisara knows something is wrong. He isn’t just going to the toilet with all that baggage. She wants them to run away but where else can they run? If they don’t stop this now, they’ll die no matter where they run. And so Rentarou is in enemy territory and being attacked by Gastrea dogs. He thought he is done for but is saved by an unlikely source. Guess who is back? Kagetane and Kohina are still alive. Rentarou remains sceptical despite they treat him. He wonders why he is always wearing a mask but is asked back does he really want to see his face? No. Wise choice. He’ll regret it if he does. Kagetane wants him to join his side but Rentarou again will not. Kagetane is very sure he will come to his side. Next day as Rentarou gets a move on, Kagetane mentions he has encountered Pleiades last night and points its direction. Why is he helping? Because he likes him. Yeah. Like him so much that he is following him too, eh?

Episode 12
Pleiades is found and originally Rentarou wanted to blast it with its explosives but his backpack fell into the river during the Gastrea attack. The only way is for Rentarou and Kagetane to combine their powers and destroy it. Though successful, it awakens Aldebaran and the other Gastrea hordes as they make their move. Rentarou contacts Seitenshi that Pleiades has been defeated and requests for fire support. The JASDF starts bombing and scatter the Gastrea swarm. Rentarou witnesses that Aldebaran still moves despite being mutilated. Is it really immortal? When Rentarou is reunited with his group, he is being told Gado died in battle and the rules state the next highest officer will take charge. That person is no other than Rentarou. Kagetane and Kohina return to the camp and the other teams are not happy to see them (they are the ones who killed a Civil Servant by the tracks because he wanted to start a fight). Kohina just wants to cut Enju and everybody… Rentarou tells everyone to back down since they shouldn’t be arguing among themselves and find a way to fight Gastrea. Kagetane will be watching his move as the next commander. More crisis hit Rentarou at it is learnt that Midori has been infected with Gastrea virus while she was trying to save an Initiator. Her corrosion rate is already at a dangerous level. Kagetane wants him to kill her because he once fought him to maintain world order and since this is the world he wished for, he must make amends. Rentarou goes talk to Midori in bed. She thinks Kisara has a dark side but believes as long as Rentarou is their leader, she’ll be okay. Then she goes off to toilet and it took a while for Rentarou to realize something is wrong. When he goes looking for her, he finds her dead smiling corpse by the tree. Shouma is sad that they were very similar. They were lonely and contracted each other to remedy each other’s loneliness. He reveals he did not leave the dojo but was excommunicated because of some move he modified that was not allowed by the master. It is the reason why he joined the Civil Servant. He regrets not killing her sooner since he was her partner. Rentarou is about to get emotional but Shouma tells him to avenge her death by killing Aldebaran.

Rentarou becomes the next commander but some of the teams want to run away. Instantly he takes Kisara’s sword and stabs his arm! Others try to kill him but Kagetane protects him. His actions might have gone too far but as he explains, everyone is fearing Gastrea at this rate that they will not be able to fight. He is willing to be the sole object of hatred and fear so that they will not fear Gastrea. He doesn’t need anyone right now but of course Kisara will always be by his side even if the world turns against him. Gado’s Initiator, Asaka Mibu does not have confidence in Rentarou being their leader but Rentarou points out their loss twice under Gado because of his wrong tactics. She is going to kill him for mocking him but Shouma stops her. He proposes they temporarily team up till Aldebaran is defeated. I know Kisara is on Rentarou’s side on almost anything but this has got to be it when he hires Miori as his tactician! No time to b*tch about it. She has created a super power EP bomb that will destroy Aldebaran for sure. However there is a catch. They need to blast a hole in its super hard shell and detonate inside its body. Where the hell in this world there is such a super piercing weapon that can do that? There is one: Rentarou. Okay. It is calculated that Aldebaran will arrive at the Flames of Revolution location. This is where the final battle will commence. Everyone makes the final preparations but Enju is having this sad feeling. This was one of the places they had their field trip with the Cursed Children (and where some proposed to him). Rentarou’s words of encouragement make her feel better. With Kagetane and Kohina joining his adjuvant, Rentarou is confident he has all the cards he needs to win this battle. But another problem is cropping up. Yasuwaki has his men have throw batteries into the sea as he plans Rentarou’s downfall. This guy should just die.

Episode 13
Gastrea is going to be here any minute and the batteries aren’t here. They’re screwed if it doesn’t. Suddenly festival lanterns are seen floating in the sky. As Seitenshi explains, they are lighted by the people, their prayers and will to live. Tokyo’s future rests in their hands. With the much needed motivation, the Civil Servants begin their assault on the Gastrea onslaught. Rentarou’s adjuvant provides support to him to reach Aldebaran whereby he uses his Varanium limbs to make a big hole in it and plant the EP bomb. Once in, everyone run and hide. However… There is an error and the bomb won’t go off. F*ck this sh*t! There is only one way. From the way he says goodbye to Enju and knocks her out, Rentarou are you trying to be a hero?! He is going to use shock to restart it but he needs to be at touching distance for that to happen. But before he could get close, the Varanium corroding liquid from Aldebaran takes his leg. Shouma is going to complete his mission since his ability is suitable to destroy the enemy from the inside. Oh, so now he wants to be a hero? Just like Aldebaran, Shouma believes his rogue techniques should be buried with it. And so Shouma becomes a martyr. There is nothing Rentarou can do about it. The explosion was huge enough that it looked like an atomic bomb. Enju is relieved to see Rentarou alive. She explains after Aldebaran is killed, the remaining Gastrea started acting strangely and scattered. They were easily disposed off. Now the bunch of JSDF helicopters arrive with the batteries. What’s the use now? So many have died. In the aftermath, Seitenshi makes her public announcement of their victory as the monolith’s construction is close to complete.

Kazumitsu sees Kisara and they are not happy to see each other. She throws him some evidence book as promised and he is unhappy that he thought he had gotten rid of them all. Kisara’s research shows that this monolith was ordered by him but at the same time there were other ingredients mixed into the Varanium, thus weakening it. With inferior materials used, he pocketed the rest of the money and bought his way to the minister post he is holding now. Kazumitsu admits it even to a point that a villain like him will not perish! So I guess it’s time to fight to the death. It’s inevitable. Kazumitsu wants to shut her mouth and erase evidence while Kisara wants revenge over her parents’ death. She uses a move she created to slice off his left leg! She makes this chicken spill the beans. He reveals there were 5 involved. Him, his 3 other brothers and Kikunojo. There were very similar of such incidents in the past. That is how Tendou obtained its current status. When their father has had it and threatened to expose the darkness of the Tendou family, that Gastrea attack in the heart of Tokyo 10 years ago was planned to rid of them all. It seems like Kisara spared his life and the way he thanks her for it is so freaking annoying. But little did he know that Kisara struck a deadly second strike that splits his face in half!!! OMFG!!! Why the delay?! Was it made to activate after he tells the truth?! Kisara is like so happy that she exacted revenge and justice for her parents but not Rentarou. That was just execution. This makes Kisara telling him his justice will never win. He failed to slay Kikunojo unlike her who could slay Kazumitsu. She can do it because she is evil. His fist of justice can never touch her evil and it is this evil that will overpower evil. Kisara is so freaking scary that Rentarou is just afraid. He fears she will become his enemy. Rentarou and Enju are on their way to Seitenshi’s conferment ceremony. She makes him promise that he mustn’t fight alone, they must do things together and never to knock her out. When she wonders the deaths of the Cursed Children and Shouma was painful and if there was anything they could do, Rentarou breaks down uncontrollably and hugs her. No, it isn’t because he missed his loli. He fears he might become unaffected by the deaths of others. He wants Enju to always stay by his side. Of course. No 2 ways about it.

Biting The Bullet
As always. Every anime that ends like this always has potential but you know, that depends on a lot of factors. Monetary factors. Ah yes. Reality is pretty much the same. But as far as this season is concerned, I guess as always. My typical answer of okay. It has its fair share of action-cum-bloody violence, fair share of funny moments, hinting moments of romance and loli harem (say what?) and of course the dark side and politics of humans. Lots of things unresolved, several question marks, some potential development in the plot especially about the big and mysterious Tendou family who may be the biggest crook and devil that humanity ever have in their midst. It’s like they are playing God and both the angel and the devil together.

It makes you wonder if the real threats are actually Gastrea or humans themselves. Although both are a serious threat to the survival of humanity, something deep in our guts tells us that humans are the biggest danger instead of Gastrea. Because as you have seen the political manoeuvres and underhanded tactics that politicians and influential people at the top employ for whatever selfish desires they have. Some going as far as to reveal and admit themselves as a big villain. Don’t look at those top people. Look at the public at how they scorn the Cursed Children when it is believed that they are the key to help defeat Gastrea. Even in times of crisis, they need to find a scapegoat and somebody to discriminate. So even if humanity is saved from Gastrea, is it worth the effort? Is there hope? Well, if looking at the big picture scares you and gives you the ultimate creeps, then look at it at a smaller scale. Because for people like Rentarou and Enju, there are little things that are worth fighting for and that is what counts.

Character wise, Rentarou and Enju are the main stars of the series although I expected to see them bonding (not the S&M type, mind you) and interact with each other a lot, towards the end of the series, somehow I just don’t feel that they have bonded closer. What I mean is that they have always been close together. They do things together and stay by each other’s side. So much so you don’t feel any sort of further development between the duo. For Rentarou, you can see he is a very conflicted guy. He is in lots of stress and very much in a dilemma. He has so much anger that if it all bursts out, it could be equivalent to the EP bomb. No, seriously, angst and frustration is how you best describe Rentarou’s behaviour. He wants to do the best he can but circumstances and his hands are tied meaning he has very limited options to go about. He is torn between the ideals and justice he believes in as well as the expectations and results in reality. What is justice? Can such fairytale justice be done in the real world? So can you not blame him for looking weary and sounding tired? Like he is hard bitten by the weather. There are sides that you don’t even see or rarely see of him like how he breaks down and cries. At least this proves that he still has a human heart and is rational enough to think that killing other humans is still bad no matter the reason and that it should never be something one should get used to. All the bitter experience as we see serve only to make him stronger and hopefully a happy ending awaits. Hopefully. Enju may look like a happy loli most of the time but there are unseen pain and trauma that we don’t know. All Rentarou wants is for her to lead a normal happy life but will society allow it? Therefore Rentarou and Enju both make a great pair as they support and change each other for the better. At least we know they’ll always be together. But I wonder how long that will last because if you remember, Enju’s corrosion rate is at a dangerous level. Forgot about that, did we?

Other characters are okay too but with the short duration of the series, most of them are not fleshed out well as they don’t really leave any emotional impact (because we get most of them from Rentarou). Some are surprising like in Kisara’s case, we see how much she changed or at least her true colours shown. The fight against Gastrea must have taken a toll on her that she has crossed over to the dark side to get things done. Is she no better than the crooks on the other side? While her rational is to fight fire with fire (thus evil with evil), but the way I see it she is just losing herself deeper into the spiral of madness that it will be impossible for her or even Rentarou to pull her out. I feel Tina has toned down after her arc and became Kisara’s Initiator. Before that she was pretty ruthless and initially a great troller to Rentarou in her ditzy form. Funny girl. Then there is Shouma whom I thought his late introduction was somewhat rushed. Then they killed him off. Felt like very rushed too. Is that the role of his character? I mean, Midori died, his temporarily alliance with Asaka felt like nothing (it’s as good as if he didn’t team up with anyone at all), what is there left for this sad guy? Since Rentarou is the main hero, I guess poor Shouma have to take his sacrificing spot. Katagiri and Yuzuki are also a formidable pair but the lack of their screen time don’t do them any justice. Same case for Sumire and Miori. Is that scientist just someone to listen and laugh at Rentarou’s stories while maintaining his routine checkups and the daughter of Varanium supplying weapons company just to give some catfight tension and a reason we can have an explosive finale?

Kagetane and Kohina are the biggest puzzle and question mark. I felt that it wasn’t the end of him when he ‘died’ since how can such a mysterious just get killed off like that? Well, it happens to some characters but not this guy. Then true enough, he is back. It is uncertain if they have joined the fight against Gastrea or something just temporarily as they seek something entertaining while observing Rentarou. You can’t tell what is on their mind and definitely you can’t tell whether they are friend or foe. Perhaps he is doing it all for Rentarou in hopes that one day he would join his side. Otherwise, always look over your shoulders when this guy is around. He hides something more hideous than the mask that covers his face. Kohina is cute and deadly as she just wants to cut things up. If she wasn’t a Cursed Child, she would have turned into an excellent serial killer.

The character that everybody would love to hate is Yasuwaki. First this guy is obsessed about Seitenshi and then when Rentarou got into the picture, he becomes obsessed in taking him out. So what happened to his fate? I guess nobody caught him for that act of betrayal. I hope this guy just gets killed in some Gastrea war. Or a simple road accident would suffice. People like him are giving humanity a bad name. It’s ironic that bozos like him live longer. Last but not least, Seitenshi seems to be putting up a pretty good expressionless poker face because I feel deep down inside she is just hurting like hell. I suppose this is the price to pay for being a public figure. So much so I thought she is stuck with that emotionless face or too much Gastrea and deaths caused her face muscles to harden. She is one of those few people who trusts and wants to help Rentarou but she is not the highest ranking person so her hands are tied too.

One of the biggest things that boggle me is the creation of the monolith. No, not the process or how it is made. I couldn’t care less about it. It makes me wonder why they don’t make more of those monoliths. I mean, make it a continuous process. Slowly and gradually, place the newly made monoliths and spread them out further to reclaim more land. Simple. So I don’t understand why they have to wait for the last minute to make one and they even know they don’t even have time to make the deadline. I know it’s for action’s sake but that’s a different story. Maybe there are greed, political restrictions and insufficient material. Humanity’s fate is hanging on a thin thread and humans can still bicker about politics and the likes? It’s a wonder they’re still alive this far. As for limited resources, perhaps this is more feasible reason. You don’t see Civil Servants wasting precious Varanium bullets or the army even using them and just sparingly. Which brings me to this question: Where the heck do they mine those Varanium bullets? Are they created in the lab or something if they are not natural minerals?

Of course there are other very technical stuffs that I never understood like the rankings and all. I don’t know how high that number can reach and because I do not comprehend it all, it is like the number doesn’t have an impact on me. In other words, I do not feel the awe or worry every time they mention about this ranking thing. Is a higher number good or bad? I don’t know. It sounds so confusing. Even more mind boggling is the power percentage that exceeds 100% and going into five digits and possibly more. What the heck is the use of percentage that we learnt in school then?! Then there are those sci-fi terms (including those in battles) and the convoluted politics and history that I feel if you are a fan of the series, you would understand and appreciate it better and in depth. For me, my mind has already automatically shut itself off and stopped thinking about it. Really. Too much information not only in the sci-fi aspects but the plot as well that never develops or go anywhere so it makes you wonder why the need to mention and bring them up in the first place.

The romance factor feels like a near miss. I don’t know if there should be one in this series seeing everything is so bleak that people aren’t in the mood for romance. Life has to go on. But it feels like a distraction and something fleeting about Rentarou and Kisara’s case because there are a handful of moments that may hint and indicate something about their feelings for each other. This is just highly speculation and those scenes may want to make us think so. Because usually they get interrupted and we never see and hear the rest of the full story of it. But with the turn of events of their different definitions of justice at the end of the series, looks like love doesn’t seem like the closest thing that you would imagine Rentarou and Kisara to be with. However we can safely assume that Kisara does have a thing for Rentarou because of the catfight clash with Miori. I thought this was the amusing part of the series and hoped to see more. Too bad. I’m such a sadist. Unless in extreme case scenario that they don’t really like Rentarou and are just using him to spite each other. Because as we can see, they get really worked up if the other gets flirty with him. Or simply they just like him.

Then there is the loli harem that one might worry that Rentarou might be amassing. Uh huh. When those Cursed Children under him started liking him, there are hints that Rentarou would have more lolis to add to his list. But they got bombed and killed off. And here I thought there was this curse that lolis who get close to Rentarou will receive some death fate because Kayo started the ball rolling and Tina would have continued this streak had not Rentarou gave her another lease of life. And then that group of Cursed Children and finally Midori (although she isn’t directly connected to Rentarou but he is part of the adjuvant, which makes her more or less the same). I suppose Yuzuki is the only exception since she loves her brother more. Unless she’s a tsundere…

The action is also rather okay and should satisfy action junkies although I won’t go so far as to say they are hardcore. But satisfying enough if you want to watch Rentarou and Enju (or some other lolis Cursed Children) kick ass. It is nice to see that some of the Cursed Children having a unique ability of their own depending the type of animal they are modelled to like Enju has great jumping abilities like a rabbit and Kohina a mantis type model since she likes slicing stuffs. The other mind boggling thing for me is Rentarou’s martial arts and combat skill. I know he learns those super punching and kicking moves from his Tendou dojo but the names of his special moves he unleashes feel funny. Sometimes it sounds grand but most of the time it feels like he is pulling out some super moves that you’d see only in Dragonball. So okay, he himself can be considered a superhero considering his artificial and enhanced limbs. But anyway, honestly I thought the names of his moves just sounds one kind. The same case with Kisara’s sword style. But be warned that there are scenes which may be too graphic as they have gory blood spill. Well, at least better than all the action and killing but lacking blood. Where’s the realism in that?

Drawing and art style feels pretty standard and conventional. Except the fact that the Cursed Children have this very loli look. I mean, when you first look at them (and all of them), you would think that they have this look of a toddler. Smooth baby face, if I should say. So how can people hate those lolis especially their own mothers? Red eyes are one thing but doesn’t the cuteness of them overwhelm everything else? I guess when you have to live in fear of alien bugs, nothing is cute anymore. In addition to the usual 2D hand drawn animation, CGI effects are also used but this is particularly on certain Gastrea creatures like Aldebaran and Pleiades. Speaking of Gastrea, some of their designs look creepy. This is basically part of me who is adverse to bugs so seeing their monstrous design is scary but thankfully not enough to give me nightmares. Hmm… Now come to think of it, these bugs may seem worthy of appearing in Starship Troopers… At first I thought certain character designs like Kisara reminded me of the anime Unbreakable Machine Doll. However this anime is animated by Kinema Citrus and not Lerche. They did series such as Barakamon, Code: Breaker, Tokyo Magnitude 8.0 and Yuyushiki.

Voice acting is rather okay with familiar voices such as Yuuki Kaji as Rentarou, Yui Horie as Kisara, Rikiya Koyama as Kagetane, Aoi Yuuki as Kohina and Shinichiro Miki as Shouma. Some need a little time for me to identify like Aki Toyosaki as Seitenshi, Ami Koshimizu as Miori and Yuko Kaida as Sumire. As for the rest, they include Rina Hidaka as Enju (Airi in Ro-Kyu-Bu), Tomoyo Kurosawa as Tina (Sylphy in Amagi Brilliant Park), Yoshimasa Hosoya as Katagiri (Shichika in Katanagatari), Rumi Ookubo as Yuzuki (Hibachi in Mushibugyou), Inori Minase as Asaka (Suzu in Love Lab), Tesshou Genda as Gado (Optimus Prime in Transformers), Yui Ogura as Midori (Komurasaki in Unbreakable Machine Doll), Subaru Kimura as Yasuwaki (Kanba in Mawaru Penguindrum), Unshou Ishizuka as Saitake (Dr Gel in Space Dandy) and Megumi Han as Kayo (titular character in Mushibugyou).

If the opening theme which is the same name of this anime title sounds very familiar, then perhaps you might have watched To Aru Kagaku No Railgun before. That’s right. Fripside sings the opening theme and the rock techno beat has that familiar feel to all the openings that they have sung in that latter anime. The ending theme, Tokohana by Nagi Yanagi although is rock based, its opener has that eerie feel seeing the eerie hymn-like voices. But once the rock music gets going, you’ll forget that it is ever a creepy song. A slower ballad gives a different overall feel although Wasurenai Tame Ni For Lotus by Nagi Yanagi is only for the final episode.

Overall, this series may do well in its action parts but other than that has lots of missed opportunities and several unintentional ‘funny’ stuffs may have turned it into something substandard and cheap instead of something you should be taking seriously. Funny stuffs as in Rentarou’s nearly loli harem, the nearly catfight between Kisara and Miori and the best part is that Rentarou cannot be bothered to stop them because he knows he can’t, the nearly suggestive hentai moments when you see Gastrea spider squirt out white sticky things on lolis and of course the absolutely most absurd and unbelievable of them all, a certain politician and big brother’s head splitting in half after spilling enough hints. And he doesn’t even realize it till it starts to have that exploding feeling. Geez… I don’t know if you should cringe or laugh because certainly some of those funny stuffs are meant to be serious. Really. Seriously. Yeah well, this kind of black humour may be the new black and in a way gave this series a black eye. A black day for comedy and humanity? Well, the devil is not so black as he is painted. There is always hope if you give it a chance.

I guess the allure of the lolis was too much that they had to make another OVA. Heh. Sorry. That was just my speculation. I didn’t expect there would be a second episode for Papa No Iukoto Wo Kikinasai OVA although this one came out much later after the TV series and first OVA were released. That is, around a year later somewhere in June 2013. So the only reason you should be watching this is if you are a lolicon. Oops. Doesn’t that make me a lolicon? Don’t get the wrong idea. I’m not a lolicon.

Okay, okay. You should watch this to feel complete that you have watched the entire series and if you like to see cute little girls in their cute little antics that do not impact the overall story, then this OVA should serve as a nice little dessert. Lolicon… Separated into a few stories, each of them gives each of the Takanashi sisters their little spotlight. As I said, don’t expect anything dramatic to happen. It’s just Yuuta and the girls. But more of the girls. They’re the main focus of this show, right? Lolicon…

Is Sora-chan’s Chastity In Danger?
It all began when Sora was lying around in her room in her underwear. Cheeky Miu barged in to report to Yuuta who is on the phone about what she saw. Sora wanted to get back at her but she couldn’t. Since Yuuta had to work overtime, that was what the call for as he won’t be back early and sent Raika over to take care of the girls. Sora complains to Raika and wants to get back at Miu so Raika had the perfect idea. She brought 2 bunny suits. They will hide in the closet and pop out to scare her. Seems pretty good on paper, huh? As they lay in wait inside the closet, Miu enters to look for them. However her friend Shiori was ringing at the door so she left the place and accidentally the duster hooked on the closet door. Yeah. Trapped. While Shiori and Miu go watch the horror video at the former’s place, Raika and Sora need to find a way out. Yeah. Yuri fanservice. The bunny suits are killing them so they have to take it off. First thing that comes to mind if a lolita and busty babe are trapped in an enclosed space. I wonder if Raika’s humongous boobs are taking away Sora’s precious space. That’s beside the point. Raika has an idea. Taking off her bra and using it to try and hook the duster through the small gap. She failed. One chance left. Sora’s turn. Please lend your bra. Also failed. Now they’re topless. Sora wonders if she can maintain this position any longer. Those boobs are very intimidating. Not enough space. So close that it’s rubbing against each other. Their face is so close that they could even kiss. Is Raika even serious about kissing her? At that time, Yuuta came back and it seems he worked his ass off so that he didn’t have to do overtime. Similarly, Raika had this idea of stringing their panties together and use it as a hook. Success! When they fall out of the closet, Yuuta happen to walk in to look for them. See where this is going? How often do you get a pair of naked girls busting out of the cupboard? Even those bunny Playboy girls popping out from the birthday cake isn’t this bad. I don’t know if Sora’s punch or kick or whatever was so strong that Yuuta broke through the glass door and almost fell off the balcony!!! Hold on tight to him!

Miu-chan’s Fashion Lesson
Shiori brings some cake to Miu and since nobody else is at home, they want to eat it. Miu messes up and has her face splat right into the cake. Don’t ask how this even happened. This causes the cake to also splatter all over Shiori. Now you get your yuri fanservice with both the girls taking a shower and bathing. As usual, cheeky Miu teases Shiori about her prized assets and feels the need to become her fashion designer because she thinks her casual wear won’t make her stand out. So Miu blindfolds Shiori and puts on several dresses. Till she puts on the school swimsuit, Shiori starts fantasizing about ‘uniting’ with Yuuta along with the rest of the sisters. Share the love! Shiori gets embarrassed when Miu puts on a bridal outfit. Miu wonders if she herself will get to wear this. Shiori is confident when she gets a guy of her own. Maybe she’ll get to wear a dress she designed herself. It’s time for Shiori’s revenge to put on clothes on Miu. That night when everyone puts on their yukata and plays the fireworks, Miu ponders Shiori and Sora can be rivals for a certain somebody in 2 years’ time. She also wonders where they will all be in 10 years.

Hina-chan Goes All By Herself
On a rainy morning, Hina wakes up early and goes out by herself. So it is natural that the others start to worry and start looking for her since she left without telling them anything. Even that lolicon Sako wants to help. He can’t bear to know his angel is missing. Somehow I feel it would’ve been better if he hadn’t desperately chip in. You can say Hina is lost but she tries to remember the directions as said by her sisters to the amusement park. When it stops raining, Hina plays at the playground with her creative imagination of taking off in a rocket through the clouds. Shiori spots her and seeing that she is on her way to sit the Ferris Wheel, she will accompany her there (because Hina went in the wrong direction). Shiori calls Yuuta and they are relived they know she is safe in her hands (and not some lolicon senpai). Yuuta reveals that today is his sister’s birthday and they’re supposed to bring a birthday cake to her grave. Of course Hina is too young to understand so Yuuta promised her to take her to the amusement park without knowing about this. Shiori and Hina reach the amusement park and wait in line to ride the Ferris Wheel. But here comes mad Yuuta. Mad for making them worry sick. I know it’s wrong on her fault but cut her some slack. She’s just a 3 year old and whose heart wouldn’t break to see a loli breaking into tears? Hina can’t hold back her tears and cries in Yuuta’s arms while apologizing. Everyone rides the Ferris Wheel together and when they reach the top, Hina takes out a drawing of her mom. Personally, I feel it’s horrible. I didn’t even think it’s human. I know. She’s only 3 years old. It’s fine, right? Yeah. Don’t hate me. Please. But there is a reason she drew this. She knows it is mommy’s birthday so she wanted to come here and sit this and show it to her. Which is the highest point and closest point to heaven? Aww… Everyone is so touched by Hina’s gesture so they wish mommy happy birthday out loud. I guess Hina is slowly growing up after all. Yuuta promises to look after them all till they walk down the aisle. Meanwhile Sako is cursing himself because he is stuck in the train which had an emergency stop. He could’ve been there with his angels right now. Thank God he didn’t.

They Grow Up So Fast…
Well, it was rather okay seeing it brought back some memories of the TV series. I’m not sure what else to comment since everything feels like it is the same. Yuuta trying his best to provide for the girls as their uncle-cum-father while he juggles with his studies and part time job. It may be tough but I believe they can go through it together. That’s what family is for, right? The girls also never change. Sora the tsundere, Miu the cheeky and Hina the cutie innocent. Not forgetting Raika the oddball and Sako the lolicon too. I don’t remember if the TV series had this much fanservice because when they started off with Sora-Raika fanservice, I thought it would set the tone for the rest of the OVA. I was thinking, were they serious in turning something innocent just for that? Were they really going to satisfy the horniness of lolicons? Apparently it was somewhat lessened in Miu’s story and practically none for Hina. You’d be a real pedo if you see any of that for Hina. As they say, time flies. One minute ago it seemed that the children might look like innocent kids. The next they’ll be hitting puberty and before you know it, all grown up and have flown the nest. It’ll always be the hardest part for a parent to let go of their child. Eventually one day, all the little girls will grow up and become beautifully matured fine young ladies. Nothing wrong with that. But it’s the worst nightmare for a lolicon!

Sometimes it is nice to see things that do not work out the first time to make their return and try again. Sometimes not every failure is bad because eventually with perseverance it will lead to success. Or maybe sometimes it is just me who wants to see certain people fail and fail all over again. There is some mysterious attraction to that. Just like a certain squid girl who failed miserably to invade mankind, we have another eternal failure on our hands. Folks, once more let me introduce you to the most adorable bungling detectives ever in the history of detective-ship. With that said, Tantei Opera Milky Holmes II might have been long gone over the airwaves more than a year ago but it never hurts for me to start watching this series much later than usual. Saving the best for last?

As those who are familiar with the quartet of prodigy detectives known as Milky Holmes, they have fallen from grace ever since the start of the series. Losing their supernatural powers called Toys in the midst of their battle against arch enemy and super thief Arsene and her gentleman thieves called Phantom Thief Empire. Life has not been the same for Milky Holmes ever since they lost their Toys and they are spiralling downwards into a decaying whirl of decline and uselessness. Even their arch enemy took pity on them and decided to guide them back to the top once more so that beating them at their best would be the best prize ever. How that is not to be and a long and frustrating journey it must have been. This season is no less different as Milky Holmes is struggling with pretty much everything. Who will break first? Milky Holmes? Arsene? Expect lots of nonsensical slapstick idiotic comedy to go with that. Now you know why I keep coming back to watch them fail?

Episode 1
Even right off the bat, we see how deteriorated Milky Holmes have become. Such heavy sleepers that they didn’t even hear the alarm setting off. By the time they wake up, it’s already night. They fall into the lake and so positive these bungling detectives, they think it’s killing 2 birds with 1 stone because they can do laundry too. You can imagine how upset Henriette is. To add salt to injury, Milky Holmes isn’t going to school either. Instead, they are happily frolicking in their own farm! So pissed Henriette/Arsene is that she even chides her own men for not doing their duty to bring Milky Holmes to their senses! They in turn blame Milky Holmes for making Arsene gloomy. Meanwhile Nero makes Hercule take up a job. The kind that has her pose as a model in front of enthusiastic painters. Thank God she didn’t have to do it naked. The gentlemen thieves try to cheer Arsene up in what they do best but she is clearly not in the mood. By now, Milky Holmes has racked up a reputation. The kind where everybody hates them! See them fighting over food in the cafeteria? Shameful. Henriette confronts them and asks them what they want to be. And they even have the cheek to answer like jokers. The gentlemen thieves are going to make their move since they are further causing Arsene mad. First they had to try shooting several letters of challenge because they are too stupid to understand the implications of a letter tied to an arrow! After spelling out the challenge letter, what are they going to do? Sleep over it!

And so… Gentlemen thieves wait at their farm only to be pissed that they aren’t showing up. When Milky Holmes decides to visit their farm, they realize it is destroyed! Can you blame gentlemen thieves for taking out their boredom and frustration? It is then that Milky Holmes turned into vicious bloodthirsty avengers! No, not prideful detectives but the kind that will kill them! Monsters!!! All because of the tomato field is destroyed. So terrible Milky Holmes that the gentlemen thieves start to regret what they do!!! Pleading for mercy???!!! Gentlemen thieves are defeated but tell them off they want to be defeated by detectives. Does that word ring a bell? Apparently Milky Holmes screws up in changing into their correct detective uniform. And they got tired after all that changing… Meanwhile Kokoro, who is running away from pesky Irene, accidentally enters into a cannon. It fires and she crashes into Milky Holmes and gentlemen thieves. Arsene notes that even though Milky Holmes has remembered about being detectives, they are still useless and some shock is needed to wake them up. Gentlemen thieves are thrown into prison and Stone River wants them to stay here till morning as repentance. Next morning, Milky Holmes happily rushes to their farm but their horror it is being burnt down and overrun with heavy machinery.

Episode 2
Gentlemen thieves easily escape their prison come morning. Meanwhile Milky Holmes is enjoying every morsel of their leftover food. Hercule suddenly remembers something familiar about their Toys power. She has a hard time conveying it to the rest. As expected, they are too stupid to get it. They try to do part time jobs but suck at them. The ‘best’ one is Nero, calculating what she can do with the meagre money the rest will earn her. Hercule returns with a ‘superb’ painting as a gift from being a model. Looks horrible. Doesn’t even look like her. Suddenly an old wealthy man, Drill comes running to them and wants that painting. It reminds him of his first love, Higatha Christie. Does her face look like that? Well, since she is a shy girl, she always wore a mask. That’s what this painting resembles that mask. It’s been 80 years since he last saw her. Milky Holmes don’t want to stay and listen to his boring crap but when he mentions about the sickening amount money he will give them, wow, they’re suddenly all ears. He tells them how they were separated on that fateful day when they were touring the Pyramids. He has never seen her since and resigned to himself as a bachelor as he couldn’t find her. He wants to repose himself with that painting but Nero tells him to splash the cash. Does 10 million Yen sound good? OH YEAH!!! Hercule notices in Nero’s happiness, her Toys just went off. Everyone else too dumb to notice, Hercule too shy to speak up. Nero is excited to order 1000 pieces of first class sushi. Then the wind blows the painting away. GET THAT MILLION DOLLAR ART BACK!!!

So we see Milky Holmes, Drill and even the sushi guy chasing after the painting, miraculously evading fatal accidents everywhere they go. It finally leads them to a beached whale. It’s not that they’re so kind in wanting to push the whale back into sea, it’s because it is sitting on the painting! For that moment, Hercule thinks of using her Toys and suddenly she has this great amount of strength to toss the whale into the ocean! Gentlemen thieves who arrived in time also got flung away. The whale crashes into a ship over the horizon. As Milky Holmes savour their sushi and Drill his painting, suddenly Higatha comes to shore riding the whale. They emotionally reunite as Higatha explains she was looking for him all this while too. However she got kidnapped by pirates. A whale crashed into it and saved her. Now that Fatty Holmes has eaten up all the sushi, Hercule forces Nero to give the cheque to the sushi guy to pay for his daughter’s surgery. Gentlemen thieves are once again put behind bars. When Milky Holmes returns to the academy, Henriette confronts them. She is not happy. She tells them the police are doing all the work and this renders detectives virtually useless. As usual, Stupid Holmes is too dumb to understand what she means till she spells out the academy will close down and will be used to erect a pavilion for the upcoming Detective Fair. Back in their room when Hercule finally tells them about Toys, they realize they have forgotten all about it while trying to survive. And Nero had the cheek to blame her for not telling them earlier. They get excited to protect this academy. But first, let’s have sushi for dinner…

Episode 3
Based on Henriette’s words, Milky Holmes is going to Hakkei Island to steal some deed and seal for the academy and prevent the pavilion’s erection. They paddle a boat made out of mud and halfway through, it sinks. When they are washed ashore, they are taken in as prisoners by some Macho S&M Uncle and his henchmen. He tells them this is actually a sea prison and this island is an island of despair! HUAHAHAHA!!! Arsene and her men arrive on the island to steal an ultimate treasure called hope amidst the despair. She is dressed as a guy but I don’t understand why Twenty is part of S&M Uncle’s henchmen while Stone River and Nezu are treated as prisoners. Milky Holmes and the other prisoners pick up sea cucumbers and this scene turns into a musical while Twenty whips everyone into work using his nipples!!! Arsene snoops around and learn from one of the prisoners about some legend. That person who knew the legend thought to have escaped was actually dried up and hardened as some statue. So he didn’t escape, didn’t he? So he tells them about some tacky tapestry he saw that pinpoints the treasure. Milky Holmes and Phantom Thief Empire go into action to obtain the treasure as S&M Uncle initiates traps to separate them all. Cordelia and Twenty are stuck in some dungeon filled with creepy slimy sea cucumbers. While Twenty is having ecstasy, Cordelia goes bonkers. I don’t know what explosive force she used but it made a crater in the room! Twenty is traumatized!!! Hercule uses Nezu as bait for the shark while she escapes! At least she’s not so dumb. Nezu thought her Toys are back in action but all Stone River sees is that she coincidentally presses the stop button on the machine that would have squished them.

Sherlock and Arsene find themselves in a ring against S&M Uncle and his octopus. Arsene wants Sherlock to handle this herself. First she loses hope but after remembering the words of the ‘wise one’, she gets her confidence back and boils the octopus! Her comrades come by to help eat the octopus. Arsene gives directions as where to where Milky Holmes is to stand. Turns out they fulfil the requirements of the tapestry. They transform into their detective outfit and defeat S&M Uncle. Arsene rides up to the top of the tower to get the treasure. It turns out to be a flower that in flower language it means hope. She and her men flee after thinking they’ve wasted their time. Milky Holmes arrives and sees the flower. Sherlock plucks it out and suddenly everything crumbles! The entire island is made out of sea cucumber?! The dried cucumbers are enough to form a land leading back to the main land. Everyone escapes. Back at the academy, Milky Holmes gives Henriette the flower but she is not amused. She shows them the news report that the island they have destroyed is the island prison. You know what this means, right? Runaway prisoners escaped to the city… Yeah. Ironically the detectives let the prisoners escape. It took G4 to put forth all their effort in recapturing them all. By the way, S&M Uncle is a government worker in charge of the prison. Don’t let looks fool you… Milky Holmes is thrown into prison and this only gives Kokoro more ammo to insult and chide them as the most retarded of the retards. Yeah, she’s enjoying her victory. Repent, Stupid Holmes!!!

Episode 4
Cordelia is having the nicest dream when some foot monster stomps on her face. Turns out to be Nero’s bad sleeping posture… Even during the cafeteria, Cordelia and Nero ended up arguing so loudly about it that Henriette had to tell them off about their shouting match in addition to skipping classes. And they had the cheek to blame something else except themselves! Save for Hercule. Back in their room, they think everything will be solved if they fix their sleeping postures. They try to relax by thinking something fun (Hercule’s dream is all mosaic out!!!). Since it’s hard, they decide to play a game. Sherlock sucks at Jenga because she causes the blocks to tumble even at first go. Nero cheats by licking Cordelia’s ear, causing her to lose. She is forced to cosplay as Arsene. Since Kamaboko was impersonating as her boobs, Cordelia and Nero once more ended up arguing about each other’s chest. Elsewhere, G4 are hot on the trail of Phantom Thief Empire as they have stolen a precious vase. Arsene suspiciously gives up the vase and throws it away. Kokoro dives out of the helicopter to save it. She could have been splat had not for her mates holding on to her. Then it is revealed the vase is fake and the real one is kept within her cleavage (how ‘roomy’ is that area?!). Kokoro is left to rue her lost while Phantom Thief Empire makes their clean getaway. Arsene laments that playing with the police doesn’t satisfy her. Because Nero and Cordelia continue to argue that they intrude into each other’s bed space, everyone changes their sleeping position.

Milky Holmes is deep in their sleep and experience some sort of nightmare due to their sleep walking. How worse can it get? Cordelia being faced off with a lion (Kamaboko being pushed in her face), nervous Hercule poses as a model in the painting class, Sherlock eating her fish paste and Nero and Cordelia stomping on each other’s face!!! The ruckus is enough to draw Henriette’s attention as she heads to their room. However she witnesses something. As they are asleep, it seems their Toys power in their eyes momentarily flash. Nero dreams of transforming into a robot to face giant iron Cordelia when in reality her Toys causes the alarm clock to dismantle and combine all over her body like a robot. Cordelia uses a Sherlock as shield from Nero’s pillow attack. Hercule becomes so embarrassed that her model picture has been featured in the magazine, she uprooted the building. Actually, she lifted the bed and causes the trio to fall off. She returns sleeping on the bed. Can you imagine? The trio can have such ‘nice dreams’ while beating up each other in reality. Best in the world. When all has calmed down, Henriette leaves the room with slight hope. Next morning, everyone except Hercule feels their body aching all over and that deprivation of sleep feeling. Though they accuse Hercule of being the one pushing them off, she doesn’t remember anything. They think she is the one with bad sleeping posture and should return back to their original positions. For once, Milky Holmes turns responsible as they rush over to class. Henriette decides to wait a little longer for their revival.

Episode 5
Ishinagare puts up posters in school to warn about a flasher going around. Milky Holmes have degenerated that they are thinking of eating a slug on a leaf!!! They hear about this flasher thingy but don’t know what it means! I think they should eat more brain food. Anyway only Hercule knows what it means and is forced to demonstrate. Ishinagare sees this and thinks Hercule may look innocent on the outside but is actually a pervert. Milky Holmes sees a girl in coat and promptly accuses her as the flasher. Actually she is a detective from the Kansai region, Coron. She also heard about the flasher incident and needs an assistant in catching them. Seriously? Milky Holmes as her assistant? Guess what? They are cocky enough to tell her they have better things to do! Well, they WILL become her assistants because she throws them free fried sticks!!! And free cabbages if they call her Coron-sama!!! Cheap Holmes… Coron has Insight as her Toys. But this baby god of hers keeps smacking her on the head after giving his ‘answer’. They are to search around the academy grounds. As we suspect, Nijuuri might be the culprit, flashing his body while telling the students to beware the flasher. I don’t know how Coron and Nijuuri end up with a fight using fried sticks and nipples. WTF. Milky Holmes feels it’s a shame to waste those sticks!!! So the girls conduct their investigation asking the public. They sound like they eagerly want to meet the flasher… They come into Kokoro and G4 (what the hell is with that bomb disarming robot called Poporo? Is it supposed to take after a certain G4 member?) and seek their help. They think Phantom Thief Empire all fit the description of being flashers. You never know they may have a darker side. Coron thinks they are the culprit.

Arsene and her men have stolen another diamond. They think something is wrong since it’s too quiet. The police aren’t coming. Well, Kokoro and Poporo are fighting each other over the calling of each other’s name. And they’re blocking the door so the rest can’t get to work. WTF. So a bomb disarming robot just went nuts? Arsene thought she heard a genuine challenge from Milky Holmes. Turns out to be another goofy performance. They are wearing coats because Coron told them flashers hate to be imitated and thus this is an attempt to draw the flasher out. They can’t even unbutton… Useless… Twenty is dismayed that they are doing it wrong and shows them how it’s done! Why is Cordelia agreeing with him?! Arsene has had enough of this and whips their coat to pieces. Seems they are wearing clothes underneath, which goes against the being naked underneath thingy. Except for Hercule. Poor girl. Naïve girl. Stone River is going to chop her up for accusing Arsene as the flasher when she herself is the pervert. Coron makes her debut but blunders. Arsene and co retreat. Hercule was running away from Stone River and finds herself lost. Suddenly the flasher appears before her! Coron?! More precisely, she is Po, Coron’s other personality who likes to show off her desires. Coron is a rich kid and her strict life means she isn’t allowed to show herself. She reluctantly covered up herself and this is where Po was born. Po admits she likes being naked and will turn herself in to the police. Sherlock takes everyone to the public bath. They can be naked here for all they want. Yeah, Coron is a rich girl, right? When Coron’s original personality returns, she knows who the real flasher is. Soon, that flasher is caught by G4. Coron did some investigation and concluded she couldn’t be the flasher. Milky Holmes sees off Coron at the train station. She gives them fried sticks as a symbol of their friendship rather than rewards. Whatever. These bird brains find it delicious. Yum!

Episode 6
On board the Eno Express, we suddenly find Milky Holmes and G4 pretty messed up!!! What happened?! We go back 40 minutes earlier. G4 was onboard the train on their way to stop a bomb threat from exploding a giant statue that serves as Detective Fair’s centrepiece. Shortly before the door closes, Milky Holmes made it onboard. Yeah, they’re not here to stop the bomb but to attend the fair. Somehow Kokoro is already beaten up and unconscious so the other G4 members decide to go look for clues themselves. Milky Holmes decides to join them too. Noting that the culprit is the one among the train, the conductor leads them to the rear. I guess they’re going to arrest to most suspicious looking one, eh? Well, we’ve got piggy boy, the flasher, a nervous Irene’s dad, a very build assassin and his foreigner lover. They’re all suspicious! Hercule opens the window only to be bombed with bird’s poo. She is splashed with water. The flasher offers his coat but Hirano takes him out and kicks him out on the next stop. Then the assassin tells Hercule to strip. Actually he wants to give her wear his black coat. Nero accuses piggy boy for being the culprit because he is eating like nobody’s business. How can she say that when her belly is full and burping all the way? The rest tie Nero up. Irene sneaks onboard on the next stop and kidnaps Kokoro. Irene’s dad is so nervous that he blunders saying there is nothing suspicious with his suitcase. Hirano knocks him out and opens it only to have an alien facehugger hugging her face! Is that a horseshoe crab? Something about he found it on some website and wanted to release it in the ocean. Then they find Irene taking pictures of Kokoro in magical girl outfit. After the father and daughter are tossed out on the next stop, Tsugiko thinks how good Kokoro looks good in those clothes so Saku tells her to put it on. Tsugiko gets swayed by everyone’s support and puts it on herself. Cordelia hears a ticking sound in a suitcase. Fearing this will bomb her friends, she jumps out onto the flower field to be a sacrifice. But after hearing how everyone will praying for her to reach heaven, Cordelia isn’t going to die alone and rushes back into the train! Live together, die together! Why the hell did she bring the suitcase back too?

Anyway Poporo Mark II hitches a ride on the train. The bomb disarming robot goes berserk as it starts trashing the suitcase! Then lots of Kokoro memorabilia falls out. The ticking sound is just an alarm clock. They put Kokoro’s blazer on Poporo and the robot continues to beat up unconscious Kokoro. Everyone continues to look for clues and since none are found, the culprit must be among them. Sherlock accuses piggy boy so he has had enough of this and jumps out of the window. Wrong guess, huh? She tries to suspect between the assassin and his lover when the conductor confesses he is the one. He is a big fan of Kokoro and cooked up that threat letter so that he would be able to ride with her. The suitcase filled with her memorabilia belongs to him. However nobody blames him since he came clean. With the case close, that is how we see the gang messed up in weird outfits. Before the conductor is taken away, he hands over the switch for the bomb. By this time Kokoro is awake and learns what happened. She beats up Sherlock because she is mad that Poporo beat the hell out of her during her ‘sleep’. But who knocked her out first? Going back 45 minutes earlier when Milky Holmes just got onboard, Kokoro smacked Sherlock as usual. This causes a chain reaction of the rest bumping into each other. It ends with Sherlock slipping on a banana peel and accidentally punching Kokoro in the face. Not funny! Milky Holmes feel excited of solving this case. They decide to return being great detectives and that being farmers was a mistake. Sherlock accidentally presses the button and this explodes the statue’s head. What a way to make a great return…

Episode 7
Milky Holmes might be in prison for blowing up the statue but they love the prison food! They think it’s heaven! Kokoro is so pissed that she kicks them out! Yeah, they even think Henriette should have been here to get them. Well, it seems she is drowning her sorrows via alcohol. Oolong tea rather. I can understand why she is so frustrated and depressed. Milky Holmes tries to cheer her up and unintentionally makes it worse. Especially when they say that ‘useless’ word back at her. That’s when she snaps. But wait. Did she turn polite? I mean, she is serving a luxurious feast to Milky Holmes and G4. Her men thinks it’s part of her plan to degrade them by giving them a taste of heaven. And then the news report comes in. It is announced that Arsene will destroy Milky Holmes academy tonight. Now we know why she is giving them their last supper. G4 helps out in stationing their men around the academy. Kokoro thinks she can command the crowd but Henriette does it better and naturally. Suddenly lightning strikes over Henriette! Arsene drops in to mock the student council president is no match for her. She uses her Toys of Resplendence to have everyone see each other as Arsene. G4 fighting among themselves! Milky Holmes fighting piggy boy. Can’t they tell Arsene is not that fat???!!! Poporo knocks G4 to their senses. They overcome her illusion and fight her. G4 is eliminated when Saku uses Kokoro as a cannon ball to fire at Arsene. She dodges. A big chunk of the academy gets destroyed. Oh boy.

Stone River cannot understand why she is doing this because she usually steals first before destroying. Arsene claims she wants to crush this academy with her own hands and challenges them to fight her. The gentlemen thieves realize this is not the Arsene they knew and want to open her eyes and stop her. Though they swore their allegiance to her, she announces Phantom Thief Empire will disband tonight and she will leave this place. Despite the trio having improved a lot, the flashy and exaggerated battle with lots of WTF moves ends with Arsene still coming out tops. She has all the power she needs to easily fight back. The sad truth is that she is always stronger. The impact is so great that there’s a crater now!!! Not even Twenty and Stone River homo combo could stop her. Once all her men are down (Stone River’s last pathetic attempt to stop her was futile), she disbands her team. Milky Holmes is pathetically clinging on to her trying to arrest her. The last straw came when Arsene asks Sherlock what she is. Though her reply that she is a detective of this academy isn’t bad, it is the part that she bit her tongue while saying it that made Arsene furious. I don’t know what super power she summoned because it’s like all her anger and rage summed up into one giant punch into Earth!!! Aftermath check: Academy destroyed. All students unconscious. G4 out cold. Gentlemen thieves knocked out. Milky Holmes ‘sleeping’. Arsene the only one left standing. And there were none… Shameful… Is this their determination to protect the academy?

Episode 8
The crushing defeat leaves gentlemen thieves reeling in defeat. They even see the cloud as Arsene! Kokoro becomes such a despicable loli rubbing salt into their wounds and relishing in it! Look at how ecstatic she is running them down in their pitiful state. Who’s the real baddie here? G4 captures them as they don’t even put up any resistance. Milky Holmes is digging to find Henriette. How the hell did Sherlock mistake a camel to be Henriette? Boing-boing… They hit a box and open it. Some dead warrior chase after them (because they insulted him for being poor). Their hide is saved by Abe. He cautions them that there are several Toys buried around. That was Toys? Morning comes and piggy boy delivers several stuffs. Firstly, a sign to confirm the academy’s closure. Then a letter from Henriette saying goodbye. Next, letters to everyone who will be transferred to other better detective academies to improve themselves. They get fired up to do better. What about Milky Holmes? They have a letter too. It’s blank… No hope, eh? Lastly, this land will be a wasteland and some other place has been picked for the pavilion. Totally abandoned, eh? And Kokoro does not waste any chance in running Milky Holmes down too. People, don’t be as shameful as her. Gentlemen thieves are in prison. They lost everything. Even their minds. Even the shadow reminds them of Arsene. How can they heal this hurting? They blame Milky Holmes, the source of why Arsene did all these. It’s time for revenge as they easily do a prison break to go defeat Milky Holmes.

Milky Holmes is at a loss on what to do. They have nothing and lost everything. Henriette isn’t around to tell them what to do. Can’t they think for themselves? Suddenly Cordelia loses it. She escapes reality via her fantasy. Henriette is around! Yes she is! The rest gets absorbed into her fantasy. Gentlemen thieves appear before them to get their revenge but are seriously ignored. No reaction from them. Realizing they are escaping reality, they too get pulled in. Gosh! It’s really Arsene! Yipee! Little do they know, they’re making out with the camel… Don’t ask… Kamaboko bites Stone River as he feels a tingling pain. He realizes this isn’t reality and takes Hercule with him. He shows her the rest in fantasy land and must break free of this spell. He lectures they have been left behind but taking the easy path isn’t what Arsene/Henriette wanted. His face is getting creepy to convince her so Hercule throws him towards Cordelia. He cuts down her delusion to free everyone. Then he lectures about picking themselves up and getting stronger for their future. Everyone ignores him. So both sides part with their own goals to achieve. They still ignore Stone River… Milky Holmes creates their own makeshift home as Sherlock writes on the blank paper about their future. At least they’re being positive why it is left blank for them. They decide to call this the New Milky Holmes Academy. This will be their future and they set the deadline to become splendid detectives before the Detective World Fair in 4 months. Not only Kamaboko joins them but Arty too.

Episode 9
We catch a glimpse of Tsugiko, Hirano and Saku in their daily lives when they suddenly receive a screaming call from Kokoro to get their asses back to work as the paper work is piling up. However they won’t because they submitted their leave form and somehow Kokoro approved it. Meanwhile Milky Holmes is conducting lessons to little kids! Nero even asks them for payment! WTF?! Taking candy from a baby? Anyway their lesson is so disappointing that the kids leave. They can keep the candy for all they care. Then Kokoro butts in and decides to help them become great detectives. But this is a ploy to give trouble to her comrades on her day off. She uses Milky Holmes to rip off all the ingredients and get free food from Tsugiko’s stall, rip apart Hirano’s dojo (Cordelia went berserk like a killing machine when the lights go out) and disrupt Saku’s ultimate mahjong hand at some sailor mahjong club. Yeah, it’s ironic they can be ‘useful’ in this sense. Of course Kokoro’s mates know she is the one behind this and warn her to stop this harassment. They won’t come back to work as long as Phantom Thief Empire isn’t around. They won’t be around anymore, right? This gives Kokoro an idea. She forces Milky Holmes to dress up as Phantom Thief Empire. So weird… So to be a great detective, they need to put themselves in the shoes of the villains? Their first task is to steal and conveniently Kokoro has them steal a suitcase that a group of security men are bringing out. Kokoro becomes implicated in their getaway so not to let her identity bust, she wears a cabbage as a mask. The security men chase them and they pass by Kokoro’s comrades. Thinking Phantom Thief Empire is back, they also join the chase. They assure the security men that they will take it from here but the guys give that dumbfounded look. It is revealed that they are criminals so the trio chase after them. Kokoro and Milky Holmes end up near the Detective Fair. They realize the suitcase is talking and it pops out a woman, Haruko Minami. She is supposed to sing a theme song to open the expo. However she was kidnapped by those guys. G4 has apprehended the criminals and thank Milky Holmes for doing something good for once. As Haruko sings on stage, there is also advertisement to thank Milky Holmes (they’ve become the main guests of the expo) and their desire to request Henriette to come back since they are confident she is watching this somewhere. Meanwhile Arty steals a Shard of Pandora from the expo. But since nothing happens, she notes she needs the power of Milky Holmes’ descendants.

Episode 10
The expo is officially open. Milky Holmes failed to become great detectives as promised themselves. By the way, the kidnapping case they solved was a fluke and doesn’t count. They see a poster of the fair organizing a competition looking for a mascot girl. They would have joined it if not for a tiny requirement: You must have Toys. That’s when Arty butts in. She is looking for Pandora’s Jar and convinces Milky Holmes to help her as it would get their Toys back. Giving Sherlock the Shard of Pandora, it starts reacting so Milky Holmes follows its guide. Meanwhile piggy boy returns from overseas and has lost weight! He looks like a poor version of Buddha! I guess foreign lard won’t do. Yokohama’s lard is the best. However each time he is about to eat his lard-filled food, Milky Holmes bumps into him and spills his food. And those foods are the last piece. Sold out. The hunger lard pangs continue… The Shard of Pandora guides Milky Holmes to their school’s statue of Sherlock Holmes. There is an underground hidden passage which leads them to a jar. Arty is waiting for this moment because this jar contains all the Toys of Phantom Thieves the original Sherlock Holmes sealed within. Finally Sherlock manages to rip off the seal and all the Toys burst out. Piggy boy is digging his final and secret lard treasure. Fate is to be that Milky Holmes once more bumps into him and spilling his lard all over. That’s the last straw. After Arty snatches one of the Toys, she leaves. Piggy boy becomes so angry at Milky Holmes for causing him trouble all the time, he absorbs all the Toys. Powering up, he absorbs the spilled lard and returns back to his fat self. Now do you recognize him? He then attacks Milky Holmes with his lard powers. After that, he drains everyone in Yokohama of their fats. Feeling all the moisture in your skin gone? Sense your hair very dry? Yeah, Twenty must be bloody shock that his nipples cannot erect! Eventually the gentlemen thieves and G4 confront piggy boy but they are no match since they can’t even hold or pick up their weapons (blame electrical charge friction for that). Plus, piggy boy releases the most fearful Toys in history: Toys of Uselessness! Everybody now lacks motivation to do anything or is just totally useless. Milky Holmes is fine since they were covered in lard. When they confront piggy boy, he unleashes the same Toys of Uselessness on them. But why are they still fine? Because they have been useless from the start! They even admit it!!!!!!! SO NOW DO YOU BELIEVE HOW USELESS THEY ARE?! Piggy boy absorbs all the lard power and transforms into… OMG! Is this handsome hunk him?! IS THIS REALLY HIM?! Wow. Lard power.

Episode 11
In the beginning, there was lard. Lard… Lard! LARD!!! Who wants to hear this lard evolution?! Anyway it’s so yucky that it’s causing Milky Holmes to feel disgusting. Why not? If you’re talking about greasy fat lard all the way. So as Lard God (as what this piggy boy villain is now calling himself) brags about all the lard, he plans to steal the legendary lard of Nero Wolfe (Nero’s grandpa) to turn this world into a new age of lard. But Milky Holmes won’t allow that and steal the lard before he could. Then they make a run from his attempts to steal it from them, including running through Arsene’s treasure mansion. Meanwhile Arsene easily steals the Beowulf sword in London. However she is confronted by Sonia who tells her she has walked the wrong path. Instead of facing reality, she took the other path to escape it. She labels Arsene a weak person. But Arsene easily pins her down. Sonia believes Milky Holmes will walk on their own one day even if they’re crawling now, they’ll never forget to move on. The student council can show them back the right path. Arsene views Milky Holmes will always be useless. Lard God initiates his plan to absorb all the lard in the world. Everything in this world is made of lard, eh? Is that lard wine he is drinking? Gross! But Milky Holmes won’t give up yet and cut short his victory. They vow to protect Yokohama and their friends.

Suddenly their Toys return and they use all they’ve got in this power battle to bring him down. Lard God isn’t out yet so he absorbs all the lard to become some giant gladiator with wings. Pigarus? As in Icarus? Milky Holmes is having a tough time fending him off so Hercule suggests the wheat straw she saw in Arsene’s mansion. It is believed to be able to suck out all his powerful Toys. Before Lard God can launch his final attack, Arsene in one strong jump, leaps all the way back from halfway around the world to slash the guardian and turn night into day! The lard wings are melting! While Hercule restrains him, the rest tries to suck his Toys out. This scene might seem gross but somebody has to do it. Sherlock hears an inner voice wanting her to just do it. Forget about saving the world or Yokohama and focus on just putting all her effort into sucking. Sherlock reads closely the label and it says to blow instead of suck. With all their might, the trio blow until all the lard is released and returned to its rightful place. Everything’s back to normal. The inner voice turns out to be the true Lard God. He tells them not to hate the lard because it takes only a little ill will to revive the sealed evil. He’ll be taking it with him. And remember, don’t hate the lard. Love the lard! Then it starts snowing lard. A beautiful sight to behold. Yes, ironically it is. Looks like snow… Gentlemen thieves sense Arsene’s return and pledge their loyalty to her. She’s back. They’re back too. Milky Holmes revels in the beautiful ‘snow’. Merry Lard-mas!

Episode 12
Milky Holmes is reworking on their farm. But this time with their Toys! G4 is busy engaging with the recently returned Phantom Thief Empire. But Arsene has no time to play with them. She is stumped that with their return, Milky Holmes isn’t making their move. Apparently they are handing out flyers for people to join their new school. They aren’t convinced. No doubt they are the heroines but also the culprit who caused the incident. So much for public confidence. Then they see the news of Arsene’s return and Sherlock got so excited to fight her, her Toys destroyed the TV! Stop breaking public property! Arsene in disguise feels the need to send them a challenge letter after finding out they were busy working on their farm and thus didn’t hear about her return. She tries to make coincidental appearance before them as Henriette but their stupidity makes them get distracted by other stuffs. Doesn’t it look bad on Arsene? She’s not giving up yet. The last straw came when Coron shows Milky Holmes the flyer of Detective Fair’s mascot girl contest. Since Milky Holmes has gotten their Toys back, they’re going to enter it. Sounds like a good idea to Arsene too. Due to lack of participants, we see many past minor characters taking part in this contest. Even Kokoro. Arsene impersonates as the mysterious Jermaine in this contest. So… We get clips of interview with the losers like Coron (God wasn’t on her side?), Kokoro (it’s her attitude that made her lost as pointed out by her mates), Hercule (too embarrassed), Nero (where’s her politeness?) and Cordelia (still in her delusions she got chosen). And the final two will be Sherlock and Jermaine. And instead of having some debate, the duo have to dance. What does have to do being a detective?

Sherlock hopes this would get Henriette’s attention. Right under your nose… When they dance, Sherlock felt something familiar with Jermaine. Her hand feels familiar and even though Sherlock slips, Jermaine properly guides her back up to dance. Sherlock then had to screw up by doing some weird solo dance move because she got desperate to bring Henriette back. They both resume their elegant dance and at the end, Jermaine wins the mascot girl contest. I guess the judges love her bouncy boobs… When she gives her winner’s speech, she takes off her mask and everyone is well surprised Henriette has returned! Not as emotional as Milky Holmes who really welcome her return. Henriette acknowledges them as great detectives and just when they are about to hug her, they bounce off her boobs and wash basins drop on them. Guess what? They lost their Toys! So dark! Can’t get out! WTF???!!! Nooo!!! NooOOOooOOooOOOO!!! Not again!!! Such a sorry sight… But this time Henriette doesn’t give up. Back at their new school (I guess the open air is such a refreshing change), Henriette and her gentlemen thieves (in their respective school disguise of course) continue to guide Milky Holmes and will start all over from the beginning again. She is confident they will one day arrest Arsene. Now, read out the meaning of Toys. Slowly the other students who left come back.

Tantei Opera Milky Holmes: Alternative

What’s this?! Wait a minute! Did I believe what I just saw?! Milky Holmes not being the useless and stupid loli detectives we know and the hardworking case solving prodigy detectives that they ought to be?! Is this really true?! And they have their Toys intact too! No Arsene, no gentlemen thieves, no G4 either. That seems to be the case in Tantei Opera Milky Holmes: Alternative. Ah, yes. That is why the ‘alternative’ word is there. In a different parallel storyline that sees Milky Holmes being useful detectives for once and without any sort of bumbling and slapstick idiotic slip-ups that we used to see. This couple of alternative TV specials are based on the PSP game of the same name whereby Milky Holmes reunite with their teacher, Opera Kobayashi in London as they take up cases and solve their mystery.

Episode 1
Just arriving in London, Milky Holmes relishes the chance to experience all things British when they hear the scream of a girl, Lily Adler who just became a victim to a snatch thief. Milky Holmes get into action effectively using their Toys to stop the petty thief’s menace and return Lily’s bag. They learn Lily is a student of Bond Detective Academy and she has a request of them. Kobayashi is having a hard time paying off his rent to Mrs Hudson. The relatively safe streets of London (*eyes rolling*) seem to have affected his ‘rice bowl’. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, right? No case, no payment. But Milky Holmes is here to save the day as they bring Lily in as their customer. Lily begins that her great grandfather, John Adler’s painting was stolen. He wasn’t a good painter since the painting of her great grandmother was quite amateurish. It went missing from home 6 months ago. Although she reported to the police, no clues were found and she was at her wits end. She views her Toys as useless and hopes they could find her lost painting. The gang gets cracking as they list down several victims who got their paintings stolen. They visit Carl Steirer and despite born a Swiss, he has very much adapted to life as a British. Showing a picture of his father’s group of friends after World War II, in the picture is also John. The painting he received from John was of his final guests. Since they were all acquaintances of John, he gave them each a picture as commemoration. Next they visit Olivia Hunter, the widow of Thomas, one of John’s friends. She pinpoints the other people in the photo that includes Ronald Harker and Major Adair. As they are taking a break, Kobayashi accidentally trips and spills the drink. But Lily’s Toys freezes it. They learn her Toys as freezing liquid into solid objects although she cannot do so over large bodies of water. She does not have confident in her Toys but Sherlock gives her some encouragement that hers too isn’t great but use it when they can in their investigations.

When the gang visit Harker, they see him close to unconscious. Looks like he has been attacked. Before he passes out from sleeping pills, he points out to a book called Invisible Man by R.G. Wells and murmurs the culprit as “Griffin”. Cordelia uses her Toys to smell faint scent of Jasmine when the police inspector Quinn (Kokoro clone?) enters the scene. She does not get along well with Kobayashi and wants him and his amateurs out of the police scene. Milky Holmes are even afraid of her! Noting that Harker’s painting has been stolen, this means there is one more painting left. They visit Mrs Adair but her painting is still intact. Milky Holmes has a strange feeling when she serves them her hospitality. She tells them not to panic and shouldn’t worry about anyone wanting to steal such worthless painting. Back home, Kobayashi knows Milky Holmes has learned something from the investigation. That night as Mrs Adair is seen leaving in haste, Kobayashi and his girls confront her. They know she is the culprit behind the serial thefts and is a con artist. They realize this because the way she serves them wasn’t very British-like. Lemons in tea instead of milk? Raisins in scones instead of sultana? But shouldn’t that boils down to individual taste? Well, Mrs Adair is a very British person, right? Besides, Cordelia picked up the same jasmine scent. Kobayashi has checked the airports and states the real Mrs Adair has left the country a month ago so this one is just an imposter.

True indeed, Phantom Thief Kitty Evans cast away her granny look. This young sexy cat brags about the American art galleries she has robbed and runs away. Catch her if you can. Arriving at Thames River, the gang are surprised they lost sight of her. That’s when they remember Harker’s clues. Since Griffin is the main character in the Invisible Man book, it means Kitty’s Toys is invisibility. Sherlock uses her Toys to pinpoint where Kitty is but it’s not enough to pin her down. Not until Lily freezes the puddle and makes her slip that Milk Holmes is able to arrest her. See? Her Toys came in handy. Before Kitty is taken away, Kobayashi wants to know why she stole those paintings that don’t amount much. She gives out a big laugh and hints about those painting having hidden values. She is after something more valuable than the paintings. Before she could finish her sentence of forever being the best underworld criminal, an air impact knocks her head. Though there is no physical wound, Kitty seems to have lost her memories. Kobayashi types his reports as the serial painting thefts have come to a close, all the paintings were safely recovered and Kitty’s sniper was never found out. Milky Holmes suddenly moves into his home claiming they are bored with the hotel life. Yeah, they’ve got permission from Mrs Hudson and he can sleep in the roof. Plus, Lily will be staying with them till she is able to get back her painting from the police. This is going to be tough…

Episode 2
Mrs Hudson brings her grandson Tommy (Detective Conan dress?) to Kobayashi’s office since afterwards she’ll be bringing him to the Ferris Wheel at Thames River Festival. Among the highlights of the festival is an exhibition of a jet black diamond known as Black Widow once owned by the late Queen Victoria. As Lily prepares to head home with the paintings, upon knowing that her great grandmother’s name is Irene (no connection with the one in the TV series), Kobayashi suddenly sees a connection with the paintings. When Quinn confiscated the paintings there was also an x-ray machine they took in. Putting the paintings under the x-ray, they see haphazard lines. But when put together it looks like some sort of map. The initial letters of the paintings, Irene, Reichenbach Falls, English Channel, Napoleon and Empty House spell IRENE. Putting Irene’s painting as the final piece, there is a raven crest and some sort of message, “The Raven will be hatched from the Black Egg”. Suddenly news just came in that Black Widow has been stolen. The culprit drops in from the ceiling and seemingly fires an invisible gun from his hand. But they don’t have to look far for the culprit because he soon makes an announcement to the detectives. Edgar Moran admits he has the Black Widow in his hand. He explains England used to lurk in London. People were afraid of the darkness. Till electricity and gas came about, London then never slept and filled the streets with constant radiance. With Black Widow, he will suck the country back into the dark ages again. Kobayashi deduces that the Black Widow is the Black Egg as said in the message. Kitty was perhaps under his orders to steal the paintings and when he had no use of her, he eliminated her. London’s route map has been changing ever since the war and the map they’ve got from the painting is the old underground routes of London. The raven crest sits over the British Museum. Probably that was how Moran easily entered and escaped via some secret route.

While Kobayashi and Milky Holmes search the underground routes, Quinn does her research and finds out that Raven was a codename for a virus developed during World War II. Scientists loyal to the Crown reworked on the virus and found it to be very dangerous. Under pressure from ethical researchers, the royal family stopped all research on it and destroy every trace of it. Of course it was impossible to do so with the technology they had. Thus it was sealed underground. One of the scientist’s ancestors must have discovered the secret and drew those pictures as clues for detectives and descendents to destroy it. The virus will remain dormant until a certain light wavelength is shone on it. It is this reason why the Black Widow was stolen. Kobayashi and Milky Holmes manage to find Moran’s underground base. He doesn’t hide the fact that he wants to bring darkness to this world. Why, oh why? Long ago, he fought loyally for his country but a stray comrade’s grenade ‘stole’ his leg. No longer any use to the army, he was discharged. As a handicap, he couldn’t find a decent job or have nowhere to go. In his despair, that’s when his Toys to compress air awaken in him. He vows to use this power to avenge his fallen brethren who died protecting this country. So that’s the reason why he wants to take it out on millions of innocent lives? Milky Holmes sure wouldn’t care about all that but he makes his escape. They have no time to arrest him since he already tells them when Big Ben’s needle reaches eight, the Raven shall rise. Black Widow is sitting atop the Ferris Wheel that Mrs Hudson and Tommy are now in. While the detectives were running about doing their investigation, Moran’s sexy blonde bombshell partner-in-crime coolly planted the egg there.

With time running out, Kobayashi, Sherlock and Lily ‘hijack’ a plane from the museum to get to the Ferris Wheel. Sherlock wants to do a crazy stunt to jump onto it. Of course Lily is afraid but Sherlock wants her to have faith in her telekinetic Toys. See, all safe and sound. Seconds away before the hand strikes eight, Sherlock needs Lily’s power to freeze the egg. As usual, she still doesn’t have much confidence and views Kitty’s arrest as a fluke. Eventually she puts her mind into it and freezes Black Widow just a second before it ends! Hooray! Everyone is saved. Now they get to enjoy the beautiful fireworks as resort. As narrated, Raven is put into eternal slumber (how they do it is a mystery since they did say it was impossible to destroy it). Lily leaves for home while Milky Holmes patron the Sherlock Holmes’ museum. They see a picture of a woman and think it’s his lover. But that great detective was never good with women. Kobayashi points out that woman is Irene, the only woman whom he respected. So, have we seen this woman before? Yeah. Sounds pretty familiar, right? Wait a minute. If Irene is Lily’s great grandma, could it be that she is related to Sherlock Holmes?! Milky Holmes doesn’t think so but back at Lily’s home where she places the painting back in its original place, we see the trademark cap and pipe of that great detective. I presume those aren’t fakes.

Bringing Uselessness To New Heights…
Oh yes! The uselessness is so great that it had to spill over for a third season! Woohoooooooo! Me love Milky Holmes very much! Thanks to their uselessness, this season is once again as enjoyable as the first. I know I was a laughing riot right from the start seeing Milky Holmes in their very deteriorated state and all the silly antics-cum-troubles they get into. I’m guilty in the first degree for harping so much on their uselessness and wanting to see them fail so badly that loli lovers might want to burn me over the stake. Okay, so I do admit that there are times when I felt pity for them. I really wanted them to improve but there is this part of me that says if they do become the great detectives that they are meant to be, they wouldn’t become funny anymore. That takes away a lot of fun. They wouldn’t be the Milky Holmes we know anymore. Being useless is what defines them! But such ‘fear’ is dispelled when I watched Alternative. No doubt that Milky Holmes is much more reliable and there is basically not even a hint of slapstick comedy, the short series itself is enjoyable. Perhaps there are only a couple of them. I’m not sure if I could find that same level of enjoyment if Alternative was extended to a dozen episodes. Anyhow, Alternative is also a good watch but I just feel that Milky Holmes didn’t stand out that much as they did in the TV series. Yeah. Blame the uselessness thingy… Admit it! Who doesn’t love them being so adorable despite being useless?

Once more, Milky Holmes remains the same bunch of useless but lovely loli characters that we know them since the first season. I have said it so many times and I will said it again that we see them from hero to zero to minus negative! You thought they had gone so low that they won’t sink any further. Boy, how wrong we are. They just keep plummeting to all-new record low depths. They forgot about being detectives and went on to play their own Farmville. They even fight for scraps of food! I know it’s not good to waste food but really, they should be using such energy for better things. If I need to point out the worst character among the quartet, it would be Nero. In many instances you can see her scheming and greedy character. She makes others work for her and then takes their compensation. Is this what she has been taught? Even if she has forgotten her Toys or forgotten how to become a detective, she shouldn’t lose touch of her humanity. Of course being the scheming and greedy character is only in the sense of being funny. Hercule is the most decent character. Just that she is just too shy to speak up. She might be the least ‘stupid’ among the quartet as seen in her observation as the first one to notice their faint Toys. I think she really needs to take up some self confidence classes. Sherlock is still that lively detective with some tenacity in her spirit. There’s always sun in her voice despite her overall performance still rates useless. And Cordelia… I think this time she easily sinks into her delusions whenever she wants to escape the harsh reality. The more deluded she is, the more dangerous and berserk she becomes. Ultimately, you shouldn’t mess with Milky Holmes when they are useless too because as proven by the gentlemen thieves, they become ultimate bloodthirsty villains! Holy cow! If not for the comedy genre, it could have turn into a bloody yandere style hack and slash!

Arsene is the most hardworking (and perhaps the coolest) character in the series. For a villain to play the good guy just to get our loli heroines back into shape, she is one to be respected. It is no wonder why the gentlemen thieves will follow her to wherever she goes. However she is also human and every human has their limits. After all that is said and done, Milky Holmes did not improve a single bit and went further down the drain, don’t you think Arsene/Henriette would have had it up to here? I really sympathize with her when she snapped. And when she went on a kill-all spree, I was rooting for her to just beat the crap out of everyone, innocent or not, related or not. Still, she is too strong and even destroying the academy didn’t bring her joy. In her moment of weakness, she ‘ran away’, only to be brought back to her senses. So now that her head is clear, her goal is clear too. She is going to get Milky Holmes back into shape no matter what it takes. Because when she crushes them at their best, all the effort she puts in will be damn worth it. I guarantee you. The gentlemen thieves are still hanging around her. I have nothing much to comment on Stone River or Rat for this season. Stone River is just more fiery and Milky Holmes has trouble remembering Rat’s name. However, the annoying scale of Twenty has shoot through the roof, say by 200%! Yes. For this season, I find sex fiend Twenty more hilariously annoying because his nipples gets more screen time! As much screen time as G4 if I should say. The way he ‘plays’ with his nipples, twisting them, spinning them, elongating them like ropes, its erection sometimes longer than German frankfurters would easily disgust you but at the same time it makes him look so perversely funny. Is this what he calls beautiful? Like they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Seriously, you will either laugh or puke when you see Twenty go into ecstasy. So gay. So funny. So revolting. Beauty… Such complicated subject.

This series won’t be complete without G4, though I feel that their presence is particularly lacking with the exception of Kokoro. Tsugiko is still wielding her guns. Hirano still holding on to her lacrosse stick. Saku still typing into the computer with that deadpan look on her face with a lollipop in her mouth. With the decaying of Milky Holmes, G4 has put in more effort to stop Phantom Thief Empire, though the thieves ultimately will get their way in the end. Kokoro has been brattier than ever especially with her favourite sentence of bragging about her IQ intelligence. Each time, it gets more and more zeroes. From 140 to 14,000 to 140,000 to 140,000,000,000,000,000,000~. Ugh… It goes on and on… I don’t think my maths is that good. I don’t even know what a number with 100 zeroes is called Does Kokoro know? Yeah, getting exponential, eh? If she was such a genius, she would have caught Arsene by now. So what does this say? I guess Kokoro and Sherlock are on the same length of stupidity because this has become a running gag for the series. Sherlock calls her “Kokoro-chan” and the loli cop will not hesitate to smash her with her golden mask and retort “Don’t call me that!”. Sherlock never learns her lesson, Kokoro never manages her anger. So they both deserve each other. Heh. Now with Poporo in the picture, are things going to be livelier with this quirky bomb disposal unit in the picture?

As for the other minor characters, those that appear in the previous season, some didn’t appear at all (do you still remember the Kamaboko-abusing Mary and Kate?) and some made very short cameos like Sonia. Irene (the one in the TV series, not the Alternative one) doesn’t feel like she is stalking Kokoro as much before although each time we see her, we can still tell that she is pretty much very obsessed with Kokoro. Kamaboko as the mascot of the series also feels lacking. It’s like I have almost forgotten Milky Holmes have had a pet cat. What can you do when their uselessness is so overwhelming? At least piggy boy has got more screen time and he even gets to play the villain for a single episode. Yeah, how many minor characters can do that? The most baffling character to me is still Arty. She suddenly entered the scene right at the final episode of the first season and in this season, she played a trickster role in tricking Stupid Holmes to do her bidding. After she got what she wanted, she left. You’ll never hear from her ever since. So what was it that she was seeking among the numerous sealed Toys? It’s like her goal never mattered. It’s just a catalyst to drive the story and lead Milky Holmes to the next level in their short-lived evolution. I’m intrigued about her. She doesn’t put on any evil expression and her liveliness is comparable to Sherlock so it is a surprise that when she did this, it never occurred to me that she would be such a character. More than meets the eye, I suppose. I hope the next season will address this. In Alternative, Moran was never captured along with his partner after his plan was foiled. So it’s a sign that it isn’t over yet. The new characters bring fresh quirkiness to the series. Personally the funniest one is still S&M uncle…

Keeping in line with the first season, several ‘traits’ of the series are still present like the mid-intermission which shows Milky Holmes (and sometimes Arsene) in different outfits and poses. There are also the end card drawings and sponsor screen drawings that turn Milky Holmes into chibi characters. My favourite one has got to be chibi Milky Holmes crossing Abbey Road imitating like a certain famous Liverpool rock band. Also, the titles of each episode are based on a detective novel but since I don’t read them, I don’t really recognize them. And as always, the amusing next episode preview in which the narration ends with somebody being accused as the culprit. Do you accuse yourself as the culprit? Except for one next episode preview, the one whereby Arsene is going to slaughter everybody. You can tell the grim tone of it when there is no punch line or joke in there.

The opening theme for the second season is also sung by the quartet seiyuus of Milky Holmes. Entitled Nazo! Nazo? Happiness!!, just like in the first season, it sounds like your typical genki and cheerful anime pop. But unlike in the previous season, we do not have a dark theme that Arsene hogged in the ending credits. Instead, Lovely Girls Anthem by Natsuko Aso is another lively anime disco pop. Although all the girls in this series are the main focus of the ending credits animation (cute girls, cute outfits, cute poses – except maybe for Arsene), notice how Twenty is part of the group?! At least in the final group shot. It just feels funnily odd. So did he really barge in or now not only he considers himself as the most beautiful but the most feminine too? For Alternative, the opening theme is also another lively and cheery piece. Sung by the same Milky Holmes quartet seiyuus, this song was also used as the opening theme for the PSP game. Alternative’s pop rock ending theme is Kimi No Naka No Watashi by Milky Holmes and SV Tribe. At first it was odd to hear a rocker’s voice singing along with such cute loli voices. Then for a while I thought his voice sounded familiar. Hey! Isn’t that Hiroshi Kitadani! The one who sang One Piece’s We Are! I thought he was from JAM Project but recently found out that he was associated with a few other groups like Lapis Lazuli and Stagger, as well as collaborated with other female singers, Masami Okui and Aki Misato.

Watching too much Milky Holmes, laughing at their silly retards and then mocking how dumb they are, has it really made me as stupid as them too? It would have been the case of the pot calling the kettle black and that it takes one to know one. Even being useless, they are still useful because it brings out the best in everybody else. You can only call yourself smart if there are stupid people around, right? Light and shadow must exist together. The question is when are they going to ever get back their Toys. It is not like they have lost it since they have shown signs that it is still there, dormant. Just too dumb to notice it all. Just like me. I’m here sitting and watching Milky Holmes rather than fulfilling my full potential to the company or nation, etc. Wow. If that is what it takes to achieve total bliss and happiness, I think I would want to remain in the comfort zone of being useless for now. Didn’t my father always call me a useless person since young? And I think I’m still on that streak of serial uselessness.

Papa No Iukoto Wo Kikinasai

November 9, 2012

Here we go again with another single parenting anime. But there is a big difference with this one. In Usagi Drop, we have a single elderly guy hitting the big three-o adopting an illegitimate kid of his late grandfather. But in Papa No Iukoto Wo Kikinasai (PapaKiki), we have a college kid taking care of three young girls from his late married sister. There is a huge gap to see how the single male protagonist handles the responsibility of taking care of a new family member in his life. Usagi Drop’s Daikichi is a working adult with a steady income but PapaKiki’s Yuuta Segawa is just a university freshman. See the big difference? So how can a university student take care of 3 little girls and not neglect his family and studies? Man, this is going to be very tough. When most students his age are already fretting over their assignments, here Yuuta is trying to juggle everything he can with what he has. Like everyone would fear, he might just burnout.

That is basically what you’ll see in the dozen episodes of PapaKiki since of course Yuuta feels the need to take care of his sister’s 3 daughters after her untimely demise. I get a feeling that this show is made for lolicons because of the cuteness and kawaii-ness of the young girls that are being projected. Maybe their trying to tell lolicon lovers to be responsible people instead of just fantasizing and fawning over underage girls (which to a certain extent is a crime). While Yuuta is no lolicon, he is just a normal kid and faces the dilemma of what to do in his course of life to keep together a happy family unit while trying to deal with the harsh reality that they may never return to their former lives again.

Episode 1
Yuuta just began his life at Tama University and he has got his university life planned out. At least he wants to work hard at a good part time job and make it on his own. Hey, that’s good enough, right? So while out drinking with his new university buddies, his beer must have been drugged because the next time he regains his consciousness, he is in a dark room and this fat bespectacled otaku guy, Shuntarou Sako is interrogating about violating the busty Raika Oda. Unfortunately Raika is such a bad actor that anybody can see through her emotionless acting. Yeah, it’s all made up. Kouichi Nimura thinks Sako should stop all this. Nimura explains he drank non-alcoholic beer but still got drunk due to the smell of everyone else’s alcohol. Whether true or not, Sako says Yuuta stripped and danced himself around naked. Till Raika smacks him with a slipper. Followed by repetitious whacking of his butt with her harisen (paper fan). Is he enjoying it? Anyway, what the heck is this all about? It’s their way of welcoming new members to their club, Roadway Observation Research Institute or RORI for short. Back at his dorm, Yuuta gets a call from his sister Yuri who thinks he should come visit their new family sometimes. Yuuta isn’t too enthusiastic giving excuses he doesn’t want to bug them and all. Yuri tells him he’ll always be family no matter what. Even though she married Shingo Takanashi, this husband of hers had 2 daughters from his previous 2 marriages and they now live with them, she still considers them as her daughters.

In university, Yuuta befriends Raika and gets to know her more. Despite being an odd girl, you could say Yuuta takes a liking for her. I’m sure any guy would with those huge racks ;p. But as womanizer Nimura explains, although she is a smart student and excels in sports, there aren’t even any other guys trying to get close to her. Maybe she’s like a beautiful flower on a high cliff? The perverted RORI president (that’s Sako) is the only one who hangs out with her. Nimura concludes Raika is a weirdo (why would a beauty like her join the weird RORI?) but Yuuta disagrees and believes she is just shy and protective of herself. Yuuta believes if he joins the club officially, he gets to be closer to her. The next time Raika calls him out, I’m not sure what kind of experiment and observation she’s pulling on him because she asks him to pull her dress to reveal some skimpy outfit. Is she trying to observe Yuuta’s likes? On the way back, they bump into Yuri who is early on visiting Yuuta. She helps him clean up his place (all those porn magazines he claims are from Nimura) and teases him about liking busty Raika (he has a picture of her as his handphone wallpaper). Yuri wants him to come to her place this Sunday and will only tell him the important thing to him then. Yuri returns and tells her daughters, Sora, Miu and Hina, their uncle Yuuta will be coming this Sunday but they don’t remember him much and since they only met him twice, they don’t really have memorable memories of him. So come Sunday Yuuta makes his way to Yuri’s house and cheeky Miu greets him. Then he meets Hina who starts crying thinking he ‘stole’ her toy trumpet. He made a funny sound with it to appease her and she starts laughing and tries it herself (nothing’s coming out). Yuuta wishes to use the bathroom so Miu gives him directions. Probably he didn’t count Sora changing inside. What a way to make an impression as her uncle after a long absence.

Episode 2
Thank goodness Sora didn’t report a pedo in her house though she is still grumpy for that untoward incident. She’s still sulking so Miu suggests to leave her alone while they play video games. Of course Yuuta is much better and beats Hina, bringing the poor girl to tears. Sora joins in and avenges her sister’s defeat. While they have lunch, Miu was pretty direct to ask if he has a girlfriend (why is Sora choking if she claims she doesn’t care?). Yuuta’s body reaction makes it so obvious. Hina fell asleep in the middle of her meal so Sora puts her to a proper bed. Yuuta also naps on the couch and remembers how Yuri always took care of him when he’s young. When he wakes up, he sees a note from Miu that they all went out shopping. Shingo returns but that guy instantly gets upset to see a stranger in his house. He doesn’t believe he is Yuuta since he is spotting a blonde wig and scribbles all over his face! Yikes! He is going to kill him! He is worried he might have done something to his daughters! He is serious! Till Yuri steps in. I guess Shingo was so blinded by rage that he couldn’t recognize Yuuta under that hideous wig. Cheeky Miu apologizes for her prank. Yuri notices Yuuta getting along fine with everyone and is assured she can follow Shingo on his business trip for a week. So this is the important thing? Yuuta has to babysit the girls? The girls plead for Yuuta to stay since her parents haven’t had time for their honeymoon and this is their best chance. Can’t say no when cute girls are asking him, eh?

So on his first day home alone with them, the girls put down several rules for him to follow. The tough part now is whom he is going to play with. Hina wants to play games. Miu wants him to help out with her homework. Sora wants him to help out with the cleaning. A man can only be at one place at a time. He might not comply with all their requests at the same time but in succession. Phew. It’s going to be a tiring day. At night, they see the meteor shower across the starry sky and they sing along to Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Bedtime and the girls wonder what lovely things their parents are doing now. However fate has a cruel way of tearing apart your happiness. That very night, the plane Yuri and Shingo were on crashed and they perished. A funeral is held at their place and the big headache of taking care of their children comes. The older relatives contemplate who is to take responsibility of them. Unfortunately Sora’s mother is no longer with them and they won’t handover Miu to hers since that foreigner can’t speak a word of Japanese. Their uncle, Nobuyoshi has decided that all 3 girls will be separated and live under the roofs of different relatives. However they want to stay together. The adults tell them not to be selfish and though they may be living apart, they’re still in Japan and will still be able to see each other. Yuuta remembers the shock when his own parents died. Yuri asserted she will protect and raise Yuuta by herself because they are family. Thus Yuuta stands up and will take all 3 of them in, shocking the rest. It doesn’t matter to him because he believes a family has to stay together.

Episode 3
Of course we know the adults won’t approve of this and the only way this is going to happen is for Yuuta and the girls to make their runaway early next morning. Back at Tokyo, Yuuta is trying to find a decent place to eat. Either the place is too expensive or fears the family atmosphere that would traumatize the girls. They end up at a karaoke box. Nimura happen to be there (womanizing, what else) and he thought Yuuta has turned into an evil lolicon! Till he learns they are his nieces. Learning the predicament he is in, he agrees to help out. He uses his charm to accompany the girls (except for Sora who still has her reservations). Outside, Yuuta gets a cal from his aunt Yoshiko about his irresponsible act. He has decided he wants to raise them but she reminds him about reality. How is he going to get the money to raise them? What about his studies? It sounds so simple when he says he’ll take up more part time jobs but if this ends up hurting his studies, it won’t make Yuri happy. She wants him to bring those 3 back but even if hell freezes over, Yuuta won’t. He brings the girls back to his dorm. It might be cramped and messy but they’ll have to make do. Hina is only 3 years old and the only one who doesn’t know that mommy and daddy are dead and its implications. So to their best, they try to tell her this will be their new home from now. Adjusting life to his dorm isn’t easy because the bathroom walls are so thin that Miu had to point out she could hear Sora making ‘those noises’. Whatever they were. Because of that, Yuuta can’t use the toilet as he pleases. I’m sure he’ll have to learn the meaning of delicacy with girls in the house now. The girls also make a makeshift temporary changing room with the little space. While they’re playing cards, Hina once again brings up the subject of when mommy and daddy will be coming home soon. Miu excuses herself to go out shopping but Sora sends Yuuta to go after her. Sora hugs Hina and puts her to sleep while Yuuta talks to Miu. Once she’s calmed down he brings her back. Sora hugs her in her relief. They tug in for the night as Sora notes the 3 of them will always be together.

Episode 4
Why is Sora clinging on to Yuuta like as though he’s a bolster? Their faces are so close… So what happens when Sora opens her eyes? You bet the shock is going to make Yuuta on the receiving end of her punch. So here’s another delicacy lesson he’ll have to learn. Don’t undress as he pleases in front of the girls even though they’re family. Oh, what about breakfast? Yuuta runs down to the store and buys lot of food. Sora says they’ll pay for their portion but he doesn’t want their money. He goes off to his job and reminds them not to open the door to strangers. Yuuta thinks about his next step to get a job when he bumps into Raika. Another monotonous horrendous acting. Sako and Nimura are here too and the president is concerned of his lack of presence at the club. Sako has this uncanny ability to smell little girls and he suspects Yuuta of harbouring them! Yuuta can’t let him know about his nieces and conspires with Raika. She agrees and lets Yuuta escape while she whacks Sako with the harisen. The girls try to be helpful around the house but they’re being clumsy and making a mess. They feel the need to do the laundry and since there is no washing machine in this little room, they go to a public one. However all public laundry services do not do underwear and they’ll have to go to the coin operated one. Sora and Miu calculate the cost and suck up their pride to wash everything at one go (uncle’s underwear touching theirs in the laundry). Sora sees a stall selling cheap vegetables and decides to buy them and cook. Can she cook? She had some practice with Yuri. Oh dear. Back home, Hina and Miu scribble doodles on the wall to make things livelier while Sora as expected fails in her cooking. I don’t know how she ended up cutting everything so messy. Then some salesperson knocks on the door and the girls panic thinking it’s a bad guy. Their clumsiness has them messed up the place again. I guess he’ll come back later. Yuuta is working on double shifts and won’t be home early. But that didn’t stop the girls from cooking for him. Well, let’s say the meat is overcooked. Heck, it’s burnt! Yuuta reprimands them for doing something dangerous but is glad they’re okay. He surprised them with a strawberry cake treat he bought. Later Sora asks why he is spending so much on them. He replies it’s because he is happy. Happy that there is someone to wish him off and to greet him when he returns. That’s why he wants to make them happy. Of course tomorrow they’ll start saving and if they work together, things will work out. As Yuuta tugs in for the night, Sora again comes hugging him in her sleep and this time with whispering words of “I love you”. He puts her back properly in bed.

Episode 5
Another untoward incident when Yuuta comes back to see Sora changing after bath. Oops. So while Yuuta is off to work the next morning, Sora and Miu plan about rearranging the place for a proper changing room. Either that or it’s going to cost some money. Since Yuuta forgot his handphone, it starts ringing. It won’t go away so Miu picks up the call. It’s from Sako who has found him another job. This confirms that Sako is an extreme lolicon because he thinks he has heard the voice of an angel! So good he is that judging from Miu’s voice, he can exactly sketch what she looks like and accurately guess her age (10 years old)! SCARY! Raika snaps him out of his sick fantasy by whacking him with the harisen. Then she deletes the recorded conversation he had on his handphone. Good riddance. Sora decides to go find Yuuta and return his handphone and manages to do so at a family restaurant where he is working. Meanwhile Miu and Hina meet Yuuta’s neighbour, Kurumi Atarashi. She can’t be a bad person because… She’s got a watermelon for them to share with. They learn Atarashi is a voice actress in a kiddie show that Hina loves watching, Luna Luna 7 (albeit it’s a villain’s role). She is embarrassed to give a demonstration and when she does, she properly times it to make her escape. Sora got on the wrong bus and is lost in town. Oh, her handphone’s power is out too. And it’s starting to rain too. Just how bad can the day get? Yuuta gets worried when he can’t contact her so with Nimura’s help, they go search for her. Sora remembers meeting Yuuta the first time. It was when Yuri wanted her brother to meet her future husband Shingo. He wasn’t pleased so the girls thought he was a scary person. They bump into him outside toilet and panic. Sora trips but to her surprise Yuuta helps her and isn’t as scary as she thought. Yuuta finally finds her and sits with her in a shelter till the rain clears up. She hopes she could call him onii-chan instead of uncle and he likes it better that way. Then another unforeseen incident when Sora runs out in her towel to catch cheeky Hina out of the bath. Whoopsie again. Yuuta excuses himself to go to his job Sako found him. Now this is the funny part. In a daifuku factory, we see lines of macho men making the cute little strawberry daifuku! The boss wants Yuuta to keep what he sees a secret simply because… Strawberry daifukus are supposed to be made by cute animals in the forest! You can’t ruin the children’s dream! Oh yeah. Just like Santa Claus, eh?

Episode 6
Miu has something to get from her old home at Ikebukuro and hopes Yuuta can bring them there since he’s free tomorrow. They make their journey as Yuuta observes Hina and Atarashi close enough to be making Luna Luna 7 poses together, the shopping district people friendly enough to give them freebies when they smile (I guess it’s a plus point when you have cute girls). Yuuta gets an annoying call from Sako and this time he hears Hina’s voice and becomes ecstatic. Slam the phone down before anything weird happens! Upon entering their old home, the electricity and water are still running (the other Takanashi members are taking care of it from time to time). Yuuta is made to stay with Hina downstairs and to play with her while the Sora and Miu handle their ‘important’ stuff upstairs. Meanwhile Sako has tied Nimura upside down in his club and is interrogating him that he knows more about Yuuta than he shows. Yeah, the sicko uses his sick ability to sketch an exact image of Hina by just remembering her angelic voice. He is going to find them! F*ck no! Sora and Miu are done packing their bags filled with clothes. So I guess that’s where Yuuta comes in. To carry it for them. Too heavy bringing it down that Sora trips and all her clothes scatter. He accidentally touches one of her panties and gets double slap. Wow. His face is really swollen. They have their dinner, bath and stay over for the night. Yuuta thought he is going to be sleeping alone. But I guess I saw it coming that the girls had the same idea of wanting to sleep together with him. Miu notices something must have happened since Sora has started calling Yuuta onii-chan. But she dismisses anything of that sort. The next morning, they depart and Yuuta gives Sora the important photo of her family that she forgot. No matter how small his room is or how heavy her bag is, she should take the things she wants. Hina mentions her wish will come true if she takes care of this bunny stuffed doll (as mommy said) so Yuuta says if she’s smiling, he’ll be happy. She’ll do just that.

Episode 7
Yoshiko pays Yuuta a visit in his room while the girls are out. She is impressed he has managed well so far and will see how things go for a little longer. However she cautions things will get difficult once his classes start. At university, another poor acting by Raika in a miko priestess outfit but Yuuta ends up in a shallow pit trap by Sako. Seems Sako wants to meet his niece and with Raika asking if they’re cute, he has no choice but to invite them over for dinner. Sora puts up a tough act in front of Raika but she finds her totally cute. Sako dresses up as a gentleman and has roses for Miu and is over the moon to see the lolis. However he isn’t happy to see 14 year old Sora and calls her ‘grandma’. WTF?! A 14 year old isn’t loli enough for him?! Raika, your cue to whack him. Another cue when he wants his angels to feed him. Yuuta accompanies Raika back and she notes it’s good for him to change. However she wishes for him to turn up at the club from time to time as it sometimes get lonely. Who? Sako. Geez. Oh, she too. She offers to help him out and he hopes she could teach him how to cook. So one day Raika turns up for her coaching and since Sora wants to join in, Miu tells Hina it’s not a game they’re playing, but a ‘battlefield’. And it’s not Sora’s stomach that’s hurt, but her heart. Oh, Miu… Sora can tell she is no match for Raika and tries to ask more about Yuuta from her. He is a fascinating observation subject to her. Seriously? Sora trips and messes the place. Cue for bath time and for Sora and Raika to bond. Sora asks how she got ‘them’ so big. Well, she didn’t do anything and if she had to pick one, she just loved what’s cute. Raika’s staring causes Sora to laugh and it’s good because it’s the first time she has seen her done so. Raika hugs her and soon the already cramped bath tub becomes even cramped with Miu and Hina jumping in. If those lolis were busty, I don’t think they would even have any space. Haha! Just kidding. Yuuta thinks of getting commuter passes for Sora and Miu but they think of skipping school to take care of Hina if they can’t find her a day-care. Yuuta says he’ll do that but what about studies or work? He considers taking fewer subjects and could ask Raika for help when he’s at work. Suddenly the landlord, Sawako Midorikawa knocks on his door and demands to speak to him. She has been observing him for the past few days and thought his nieces were relatives paying a visit. Now that they’re permanently staying and since this violates his rental contract, she gives him a month to leave. B*tch! Don’t add to their misery!

Episode 8
Sawako doesn’t care about the circumstances since his room is only meant for one. Yuuta knows that too but brought them in anyway. She has nothing else to say in this matter anymore. Sawako doesn’t believe a student would do a better job in raising kids and adults would do a better job. Yuuta meets Raika and tells her the problem he is facing now and blames himself for not thinking things through. Raika says if it comes down to this, she’ll take Sora and the rest in. Yuuta starts fantasizing a wonderful family life with her. Too bad he said it all aloud. Must be his stress. And Raika had noted it all down! Good observation subject. Raika will ask Sako to search for new places since he has connections. No kidding on Yuuta’s worries. It’s causing him to lose focus on his job. It’s just straining him to think about getting more jobs to support the girls. The RORI members go house hunting but Sako isn’t happy Sora the grandma is tagging along instead of the angels. Where’s the harisen? They survey several places but it’s either too expensive or well, haunted. In worst case scenario, Sako is willing to bring Miu and Hina under his care! Don’t ever let that happen! Sawako is reprimanding Atarashi on violating her contract agreement for paying her rent late. Innocent Hina waltzes in between noting Atarashi is getting yelled at. Sawako sees the cuteness in Hina and lets Atarashi off with a warning. But when Hina wishes the ‘aunty’ goodbye, Sawako tells her off she is not that old and is only 29 years old. Oh dear. She made Hina cry! Everyone freezes not knowing what to do! So pitiful Hina’s cries were that she messed up her clothes and Sawako’s with her ice cream. Sawako bathes with Hina. Miu hopes she would forgive Yuuta if they leave. Sawako believes that she was acting out of concern for them for she fears Yuuta hasn’t the proper allowance to raise them and might abandon them. Miu believes Yuuta will never do that. The house hunt ends up with nothing but Yuuta is glad to know what to do now because he has always been trying to do things by himself and thanks them. He and Sora decides to go see the landlady. The real landlady turns out to be Sawako’s mother as she reprimands her daughter for making such rash decisions and being inflexible. Yuuta begs to push back the date till he at least finds a place to stay. However Sawako will let him off this time and rewrites the contract to have additional 3 tenants. But if the next time they cause problems, she’ll take Hina in. She really likes her, doesn’t she? Yuuta manages to find a day-care for Hina and gives the train commuter passes to Sora and Miu for them to commute to school.

Episode 9
An episode focused on Miu, first we see the girls having a tough time commuting to school and have to tussle with the morning hour rush crowd. Yeah, it took them 1.5 hours to get to school. Most of her friends notice a change in her character. Her shoes are dirty (from the trampling in the train crowd) and for someone who always dressed perfectly didn’t mind. She now eats eggplants that she once used to hate (because it’s expensive). They think she must be having a tough time dealing with her parents’ death. After school, Miu decides to hang out by herself for a while and meets Nimura. I believe he has good faith when he wants to ‘date’ her. Not because he’s tired of his university girls and turned into a lolicon. He takes her to the aquarium and then for lunch at a cafe. They talk about Yuuta’s hectic life when other people mistakenly note the cute siblings they are. They play along and agree that they are the best looking couple in this diner after all. Nimura continues to take her shopping for clothes, shoes (I guess she was just joking about wanting that pair of expensive Cinderella glass slippers), some photo shoot and finally up the tower of an observation deck. Nimura worried when he thought he saw her crying after getting nostalgic pointing out her old home. But it was just the yawn to adjust the pressure in her ear (really?). Miu explains she doesn’t like people being too worried about her but Nimura says it’s their way of being considerate. She notes he understands a woman’s heart and the reason why he’s popular with them. However she outright rejects him since he is not her type. She hopes Yuuta could learn something from Nimura. She thanks Nimura for taking her out today and will go home by herself since Cinderella doesn’t want anyone to see her after her magic is gone.

Episode 10
Now it’s Sora’s turn for an episode on her. Just like the rest, she is affected by the change in her new life. So much so she has a hard time coping with her choir club. Because the club is gunning for victory in a competition, Sora fears she won’t have time to do housework so she hands in her resignation letter to the club president. She is reluctant to let her go as she knows Sora loves to sing but since Sora is burdened with other tasks, she has no choice. One night Yuuta returns home to see Atarashi sitting on the stairs drunk. Seems she will be quitting her voice acting job. He tells this to the girls and Sora couldn’t believe it because Atarashi loved her job very much. This causes Sora to space out and think about her own predicament. She meets Atarashi at the laundry and asks her straight if she’s going to quit. But she explains she didn’t get any parts this month so technically she’s got no job (from what I understand, her villainous character was killed off in Luna Luna 7). And she made a promise to her parents if she hasn’t got any job, she has to return to her parents at the countryside. Sora realizes herself a hypocrite when she questions Atarashi if she really wants to quit since she started it because she loves her job. Sora sits along on a playground swing with pretty much everything else weighing on her mind. Till Raika pops up. Sora forces herself to put on a cheery face and dismiss that she has problems so Raika puts her face in her bosoms. At least this is what she read on how to make a girl feel better. Raika notes her kindness because she doesn’t want her to worry but on the contrary, Raika wants to worry about her. They go back and cook for the rest and though Sora is still not confident about her cooking, Raika explains that everyone’s happy when she’s making good food for them. Sora and Yuuta go out to buy some stuff that night and she laments she’s been causing everyone trouble. Yuuta says he used to think like that and wanted to avoid causing everyone problems and do everything himself. But he realized relying on others isn’t such a bad thing and that is what it means to be a family. Thus Sora expresses her with to rely on him more. Sora soon asks for her club president to return her resignation letter. Fortunately she has kept it and was thinking of a way to bring her back to the club but now that she’s came back on her home, I guess this solves everything. Sora is happy but with things the way they are now, she can’t come to the club often. She hopes she can come back here once she can sing. Of course she can. On her way back, she meets Atarashi who tells her she got a minor role in an anime. Thanks to her words, she remembers how much she loves voice acting. Sora is now able to make delicious omelettes for her family.

Episode 11
Sora has this dream that she marries Yuuta. I think in reality she really wants that too. Then she opens her eyes and finds herself nearly kissing Yuuta in his sleep! Phew! That was too close and dangerous! Sora walks back with Raika from an errand. Raika lets her know that Yuuta is happy now as a father. That’s why she wants to be their mother because the 3 of them are the cutest things ever. Sora dreams of another married life with Yuuta (she’s got big boobs now?!) but she might be just desperate because she’s sleep talking in the middle of class! How embarrassing. Then another dream of wanting to introducing Yuuta her husband to her parents but Yuuta is not by her side so they want her to go with him and look for something he’s forgotten. And then driving along in his red convertible sports car, probably the thing he has forgotten was Miu and Hina. And in another scene in the car, it seems Yuuta is speeding up and driving off a cliff. When Sora looks back, Yuuta is missing from the driver’s seat! Oh sh*t! Back to reality, Yuuta comes home to find his place cleaned up. Who could it be? Oh, it’s Yoshiko. Meanwhile Sora gets a call from the day-care that Hina is sick and they can’t get a hold of Yuuta (his handphone is out of battery). So Sora and Miu skip class and rush to bring Hina back. Once the girls return, Yoshiko could immediately spot what is wrong with Hina and like the pro mother she is, tells the kids what to do. She hopes this has opened Yuuta eyes on what he’s facing and to consider about the letter. That night when Yuuta and Sora can’t sleep, they talk about what happened recently. Yoshiko visited and cleaned up the place since she couldn’t stand the mess. He got reprimanded when he’s not going to classes properly and the note about Hina’s day-care upcoming performance he forgot. Yoshiko could also tell Sora hasn’t been going to her club activities and Miu visiting the infirmary quite often. A parent should at least notice this kind of things. So when Hina broke into a fever, that was the last straw even though it wasn’t his fault that his handphone was out. But he feels he should have at least kept it fully charged in case of such emergencies. One morning when everybody went out, Sora finds a letter in Yuuta’s notebook that Yoshiko mentioned. It’s a letter from Nobuyoshi. He has heard about Yuuta and the girls via Yoshiko. He felt he said some harsh things and made some harsh decisions then at the funeral and thinks the girls hate him. However he has finally prepared for this responsibility and has talked with her and the other relatives that he is willing to take all 3 of the girls under his wing. For he believes Yuuta should be free to pursue his happiness as Yuri had wanted instead of sacrificing himself for the girls. That night as they eat dinner, happy Hina once again unknowingly brings up this topic. She is going to put up a great performance she worked hard on and show it to her mommy and daddy. Then they’ll come back.

Episode 12
Now the tough part is to tell Hina her parents aren’t coming back. Will she understand it or not. Sora says she’ll do it. But seeing her cheery innocence is getting harder and harder, isn’t it? Then she just drops the bombshell. Daddy and mommy won’t be coming back. In that case, Hina will go to see them. She can’t do that too. She just can’t see them. Hina couldn’t understand and throws a tantrum she wants to see them because she practised her singing and dancing so hard. Sora sits alone at the swing when Nimura comes by. He has heard it from Yuuta but that guy too is somewhat depressed. When he talked to Raika about it, Raika harshly agreed to his comment that he can’t be their father. Sora and Miu walk home with Hina one rainy day but it seems Hina is being her cheery self. Did she forget? Rather, she decided not to cry anymore because if she cries, she’ll make her sisters cry too. That night Sora thinks about the contents of the letter in which Yuuta is given till the end of the month to reply. Since Yuuta leaves early next morning, Hina suspects he will visit his uncle and follows him. To her surprise, Yuuta visits Yuri’s grave. He ‘apologizes and talks’ to his sister that he has been thinking and that there is no other choice. Before he could finish his sentence, Sora jumps the gun and pleads to him she wants to stay with him. Even if Nobuyoshi takes all 3 of them in, she prefers that all 4 of them be together. That’s good because that is what Yuuta had in mind too. He was just sad that he couldn’t be their real dad (seriously?). He’ll do everything he can to protect them. Sora is so happy that she is brought to tears. Nobuyoshi and Yoshiko have seen everything. Realizing the strong bond they share, they decide to let them stay together. Yuuta asks why Yoshiko had let him do as he pleased then. It was her way to atone her sins. When Yuuta and Yuri’s parents died 15 years ago, she felt the same way he did but didn’t have the courage to take them in. Though they note Hina will be a tough one to handle, Yuuta says not giving up is what he is good at.

Yuuta and Sora walk back and he tells her the first time Yuri came to his parent-teacher open house. It was embarrassing the way she introduced herself as Yuuta’s father-mother-brother-sister-grandpa-grandma all-in-one. But after that all his friends were talking how cool she was. Yuuta goes back to RORI club to thank Raika. Because of what she said, it made him think. Now he understands why he couldn’t be their father. He is their father! Geddit? And now, he asks Raika to be his wife. EEEEHHHHH???!!! Oh, Sora. How are you feeling now? But not his real wife if that’s what he meant. Just to pretend to be his wife for the day to see Hina’s day care performance. Everyone they know from the shopping district to their landlord, uncle, aunty, Atarashi, Nimura and (unfortunately annoying) Sako are here to give Hina their support. Hina’s friends are amazed at the numerous fathers and mothers she has! Sora isn’t pleased that Raika got to be Yuuta’s ‘wife’ for the day so cheeky Miu pushes Sora into Yuuta’s arm. I guess it made her day. Yuuta narrates he feels better seeing Hina smile and the odd thing about being a family is that it can still remain as one whether it’s just 2 people, separated or not blood related. He is going to protect this happiness. Yuuta comes back late one night and to his surprise the girls throw him a surprise thank you party. However it’s off to a shaky start because Sora wants to change, Miu needs to go to the toilet, Hina can’t wait to eat the cake and Yuuta gets locked outside the balcony. “Will you listen to what your father say!”. Lastly, Yuuta gets permission from Nobuyoshi and Yoshiko to move back into Yuri and Shingo’s house. More spacious and feels like home, eh?

Lucky Hina wins a first prize trip for an overnight stay at the family leisure park hotsprings. As usual, Sora wants to get closer to Yuuta and desperate enough to put pads in her swimsuit. Doesn’t it make her boobs look a little bigger? Heck, not that Yuuta notices! Probably he needs another earful from Miu about delicacy because he didn’t comment on her swimsuit. So Sora ends up covering herself with a shirt because as Miu puts it, wants him to be the first to see her swimsuit. But it’s going to take a while because Raika is there. And Nimura. And oh God no, Sako. That lolicon pervert accuses Yuuta of wanting to grab his angels for himself and all those filthy sick things only a lolicon like him can conjure. Raika, it’s your cue for your harisen. Over the next few scenes, Sora notices Raika staring intensely at Yuuta playing with Hina. Could it be she really likes Yuuta? Till Raika wants to join them in riding the tube that Sora doesn’t want to lose out, lose her shirt and joins them. Well, the slide was fun. But it gave visitors an unexpected fanservice when Raika’s top slip off! Oh, and Sora’s pad too. Yuuta doesn’t even know what this ‘cushion’ is! Another earful from Miu about delicacy in line? Later Sora eavesdrops on Raika talking to Sako. He concludes she is in love and suggests a famous tourist spot called Lover’s Cape. Legend has it when couples ring the bell together, they’ll forever be united. Raika is going to make her move tonight. Sora is disheartened and Nimura can tell what’s wrong with her. Yuuta is surprised that Raika is going to sleep in the same room with Nimura and Sako and suggests she sleeps here in his futon. Sora jumps the gun and thinks they’re going to share the same futon together and gives them a piece of her mind. Actually what he meant was she sleep in his futon and he sleeps with the guys. See Miu smirking at Sora…

So the girls take a dip in the hotsprings. Sora doesn’t want to sit close to Raika. Hina and Miu are having fun with her. Hina squishes Raika’s boobs. Raika allows Sora to do the same but scoffs off that she is not a kid. Miu teases her about her pads so Sora tries to get Miu but slips and falls face first into Raika’s boobs. Now that’s what you call Faceboob! Raika finds them all cute and wants to be their mother. As long as Yuuta is with them. But if she really becomes that, it’ll ruin Sora’s chance of you-know-what. That night Sora sees Raika leaving her bed and follows her. Her suspicions were correct when Raika enters the room where Yuuta is sleeping and eavesdrop. Let your fantasies go wild! Anyway Yuuta gets a surprise wake-up to see Raika trying to seduce him in sexy positions. Sako and Nimura are missing. Well, Raika had them leave. Oh. She wants Yuuta to do as he pleases. Since he doesn’t really hate the way she looks (who would dislike looking at the body of this busty girl? Unless you’re a flat chest lover), now it’s his turn to please her because she’s in love for the first time and needs his help. Gulp. She explains to him about Lover’s Cape. Nimura catches Sora eavesdropping and ends the act by opening the door. Sako pops out from the closet not happy Nimura has ruined everything. Seems this was a setup to make Yuuta cajole his angels to follow them to Lover’s Cape and ring the bell. So yeah. Raika wants to ring the bell with Hina. Relieved or disappointed? So everybody rings the bell and pray that they’ll forever stay together. For Sora, it may didn’t go as planned but this has been a fun and memorable family trip. I guess there’ll always be another time and many more chance for her, eh?

Papa, The Girls Love You!
It’s always nice and heart-warming to see a family getting to stay together in the end. If it ended with them being separated, I’m sure it’ll leave a bitter taste in many viewers including yours truly. At least in the aspect of anime. We all want a happy ending, right? As for life, it may be a different story. That’s why sometimes when I think about it if the producers pulled off a crazy shocking ending to separate them, I would have come to a conclusion that eventually time will heal their wounded hearts. I mean, not to say that the girls have gotten over their parents death by with Yuuta around, they think less of them (in a good sense, that is) and don’t wallow in sorrow for the rest of their lives which may lead to future trauma. So in the scenario that Yuuta and the girls were separated, it might be painful at first but as time passes, they’ll get used to the new environment, carry on with their lives and once they grow up, they’ll understand and see things better. Provided if it turned out that way but since it didn’t, I’m just glad Yuuta gets to be their father. He may not be their real biological father and a substitute father, but to the girls he is their father and more than just an uncle. “More than an uncle” for Sora. Yeah…

Whether Yuuta breaks or makes it in his life is another different matter altogether. I can see and feel the hard time he is going through and sometimes wonder if he could really pull it off. Not to say that I have the same experience but when I was in college, I was already having a tough time just trying to study for my exams alone! So for Yuuta who has to learn to grow up suddenly overnight to pull off taking his university classes, taking care of his family and taking up part time jobs for financial support, it’s an incredible feat and I really salute and give my hats off to him. Call me pessimistic but if I were in his shoes, I won’t be able to do all that. Hey, at least I know my capabilities and limits. But Yuuta isn’t going through all these by himself as he has the support of his friends and the friendly neighbourhood (no, not Spiderman) in the form of the shopping district. Yeah, those freebies to Hina are a great help. It pays to have a cute little girl on your side, eh? Yuuta maybe just needs to learn to be a little more delicate when handling girls. He’s not just a university guy now. He’s a father so he has to take notice of such things. Accepting them was easy. Taking care of them may be a little tough but the hardest part is, can he let them go? When they’re all grown up and ready to leave the nest, can he ‘release’ them? It’s that heartbreaking moment that every parent has to face but we’ll leave that for another time and story. Let’s not get ahead and be too judgmental if Yuuta can handle it or not. Let him and the rest take it slowly one step at the time. After all, what is there to rush in growing up?

Thankfully the girls themselves do not give much trouble in the sense that you can be assured that they won’t turn into delinquents or stray to the wrong path. They just need a little more parental love. In short, Sora was just a tsundere, Miu the cheeky one and Hina the innocent little toddler. I guess when you’re at that age like Sora, girls should experience an early change in their hormones so it’s no surprise that she is in a dilemma about her feelings about her uncle. Technically they aren’t blood related so it’s okay for them to get married, right? Well, if she manages to get that far. So with her confused feelings, it’s no wonder Miu loves to tease and watch her sister when it comes to such matters. Miu is such a lively and cheeky girl that she perhaps has the best lines when it comes down to such scenes. Her friendly disposition is infectious and it’s easy to understand why everyone gets along with her. Of course the star would be Hina seeing she’s the cute little toddler that will warm your heart each time she opens her mouth or just do something. Even a cold-hearted Sawako fell into her ‘charms’. Although she is too young to understand about her parents’ death and it’s understandable that the rest doesn’t want to lie and keep hiding this fact from her, I suppose it’s better that they have all smiles rather than frowns. Be happy in the present and not drown in the past. I mean, it’s like how do you explain to a kid about God in a world filled with crime an injustice?

Raika is an odd and amusing person. Because of her expressionless face and her monotonous tone, you can never know what she is thinking. All we know is that she finds Yuuta’s nieces cute and really wants to be their mother. It’s not really clear if she does have feelings for Yuuta because she doesn’t really obviously display them. After all, she did say Yuuta is her favourite observation subject. Observe what? I don’t know. His reactions to her unconvincing acting? I’m sure she’s got a lot of ‘data’ on that by now. And I’m pretty sure that she’s not just sticking around Yuuta just to be close to the girls. I mean, that’s true too but she’s not using him as a stepping stone. Well, if the ‘battle’ over Yuuta ever gets intense, I’m sure Miu would love to stick around see the ‘fireworks’. I’m pretty certain she’ll say that too :). Busty babe versus flat chest loli. Well, if Yuuta ever gets wind of this. I’m sure Yuuta is too busy thinking to provide for the girl than for any romance with Raika. Hey, she did hear his dreams to have a married life with her, right? Nimura may be a typical lady killer, going out with other girls but he’s a nice and handy guy to have around. At least he targets girls his age (I feel that outing with Miu isn’t considered a date to woo her) and isn’t as perverted as that lolicon Sako. I wonder what will be his reaction when Miu and Hina grow up a few years later. Will he abandon them? I guess this is why Yuuta won’t trust this guy to handle his nieces. That’s the difference between a father and a lolicon. It’s also amusing to see this running gag of Raika hitting Sako with her harisen. It sometimes feels like an S&M play the way she smacks and spanks his butt with it. I’m not sure whether he is enjoying it or not. Sawako isn’t such too bad herself if she loosens up and smiles more. Maybe she just needs more Hina to brighten her day. If everyone adheres to rules strictly (that’s why rules were made, right?), it might caused problems for genuine people like Yuuta. After all, rules were made to be broken the first place too, right? Bending a little doesn’t hurt just like telling a white lie. Nobuyoshi and Yoshiko were worried about Yuuta and just wanted the best of him. Now that they have seen him with their own eyes, they’re ready to let him take the responsibility like a real man. I felt Atarashi’s role to not have a major impact in this series. Yes she’s a side character but besides being a voice actress of a popular kids’ anime and Yuuta’s neighbour, she doesn’t really stand out except for that Sora-focused episode.

I couldn’t say about the fanservice and if it was, it was intended for lolicons. I mean, even the opening credits animation, you’d get a glimpse of Sora, Miu and Hina sleeping in their negligee. Feels a bit suggestive. Then throughout the series you’d see them in their sleeping pyjamas, Sora bad-timing in changing her clothes and some bathroom scenes and like I said you’d find these a turn on if you’re a lolicon. For those who aren’t, there is always Raika. However this show focuses on the little ones so don’t expect to see too much of Raika time. To say that this is a harem anime isn’t exactly wrong because in a way, there are a few lovely girls hanging around a main guy, right? Though there are some depressing bits in the series, these are liven up with some cute (duh!) and funny moments. The funniest one (or scary, depends on how you look at it) still has to be that strawberry daifuku factory. That short scene has got to be a laugh riot. Now I’m starting to believe that those cute little colourful vitamin pills for children are being made by such elderly macho men! That’s true horror! As the drawing and art makes the girls cute and exuding with ultimate moe, but I can’t help notice the pink blemish over their cheeks and sometimes certain parts of their bodies. I don’t know. It makes it feel like as though they look like dolls and gives me an impression that their bodies are really smooth and shiny. Resisting urge… To touch…And feel…

Eri Kitamura does her usual style with cheeky lolis as Miu. Sometimes she reminds me of her other role as Rin in Kodomo No Jikan. Just not as horny. At first I thought they used an authentic young little girl to voice Hina but something kept bugging in my heart that she’s a grownup making such a kiddie voice. True enough, Hiromi Igarashi did a very good job in making Hina sound like a 3 year old with her character mispronouncing certain words like a baby kid. She was the voice of Aoi in Kaichou Wa Maid-sama and Yuuka in Baka To Test To Shoukanjuu. Yui Horie as Raika surprisingly did well in making Raika sound emotionless but yet so funny when she tries to put in some emotion into her fake acting. She sounds a bit like her other role as Masako in Mawaru Penguindrum but more flat and monotonous in this one. I thought Sako sounded a bit too old as a university student (if he is a ronin, that’s a different story) like as though he has got something stuck in his throat but I guess I got used to this perverted lolicon. He is voiced by Junji Majima which I believe have never heard him putting up such ‘grandpa’ voice since I usually hear him as high school student roles like Ryuuji of Toradora, Kinji of Hidan No Aria and Shin of Memories Off series. Daisuke Ono as Nimura once more does his best in using his charming gentleman voice for charming gentleman characters like Sebastian of Kuroshitsuji and Koizumi of Suzumiya Haruhi No Yuutsu.

The other casts include Wataru Hatano as Yuuta (Gajeel in Fairy Tail, Yuuto in Nogizaka Haruka No Himitsu), newbie Sumire Uesaka as Sora (Yoshiaki Mogami in Sengoku Collection is her only other role at this point), another newbie seiyuu Sakura Nakamura as Atarashi (hope she gets more roles than her minor unimportant extra character roles in Mayo Chiki and Cube x Cursed x Curious), Rina Satou as Sawako (Kaoru in Amagami SS), Kyoko Hikami as Yoshiko (Urara in Sakura Diaries, Rabien Rose in Di Gi Charat), Sayaka Ohara as Yuri (Alicia in Aria The Animation) and Nobuo Tobita as Shingo (Domon in Flame of Recca). The opening theme by Eri Kitamura is called Happy Girl and sounds like your typical anime pop with her trademark style. The song is catchy in the sense that it is filled with lots of synthesizer sound effects and at certain points her voice is computerized. But the ending theme is even cuter and catchier. Coloring by Yui Horie is filled with that short little cute synthesizer bursts that it makes you feel like getting up from your chair and do a little robotic dance. Really. However those synthesizer beeps are too overwhelming that I can’t really hear what Yui Horie is singing till they are toned down during the chorus. Also, her voice is computerized to give off that cute effect.

I’m not really sure if blood is thicker than water here. Though it is true that this anime is trying to preach to us about the importance of a family staying together, but at the same time it is not necessary to be blood related to have a family. All you need is lots of love and support from each other. That is what counts to be a family. It doesn’t matter if your house is small and cramp, but if you’re a happy family, you’ll never feel lonely. This anime also teaches us about taking responsibility. Once you’ve taken up this ‘job’, there is no turning back. Abandoning and dumping everything halfway is just immature and too cruel. Caring for a family isn’t an easy job and it is the kind of work that is 24/7, 365 days a year and without any rest days. But the benefits are of course substantial and worth the toil and sweat you put in. I may not have experienced it myself but after seeing lots of shows like this, I can say that it’s something that is rewarding. Of course no life is without its obstacles but that is only minor once you’ve overcome them. Thus for Yuuta, he takes on several part time jobs to cover for their living expenses but he can never retire from his job of being their father. It may not be in monetary terms he’ll be compensated but the happiness and well-being of his nieces. Unless he kicks the buc-… Oops! Touch wood! Hope that never happens though I get this sinking feeling it’s a ‘family tradition’ to die young. Also teaching us is that we shouldn’t rely solely on ourselves to take care of everything. We aren’t superhuman so by doing everything by ourselves so as not to bother others will only tire ourselves out and in the end make it worse.

So if you are ever faced with the dilemma of taking care of someone else’s child due to some unprecedented tragedy, if you choose to be like Yuuta, then be prepared to kiss your freedom life away. I know this sounds unkind to what I’ve been saying so far but it serves as a warning that if you’re not up to task, then it is better for you to just walk away rather than have everyone including yourself suffer and regret later on. Which is what we see so much in today’s life. Next question: If a child ever starts asking about the birds and bees, don’t go saying that they are made by macho men in a factory line! This isn’t about ruining dreams. This is trauma!

Hidan No Aria

February 26, 2012

Loli. Tsundere. Rie Kugimiya. A gun in both hands. Get the picture? That basically sums up what Hidan No Aria is. There must be something about Rie Kugimiya and her tsundere loli roles that fascinate me for a very long period of time. To say that I’m not a fan of hers would be inaccurate because as up till today, Mamiko Noto is still my number one seiyuu anytime, anywhere, anyhow. Year in, year out, seasons come, seasons go, it’s like almost every quarter we have at least Rie Kugimiya voicing the roles that she does best in. And no, that wasn’t a complaint. Thus, it was one of the few reasons (or excuse however you look at it) to watch this series. The other being comedy and how often do you see girls whipping out a couple of guns in their hands? Revi from Black Lagoon? Jo from Bakuretsu Tenshi? That seems like from a long time ago.

In this series, there is a school, an academy called Butei. Think of it as a military type of school but with a mix of your typical high school anywhere else in the world. Here, students learn the basics and specialize in certain areas that would allow them to carry arms to apprehend criminals. It’s like a school for spies, SWAT and super secret service agents. In other words, James Bond and Jason Bourne wannabes should attend this school. Really. So with criminals getting bolder and the fine line of justice blurring these days, do you see the need of such schools?

Episode 1
Kinji Tooyama is a student of Butei. Not a model student whatsoever. It’s understandable that he wants to leave this academy (which is an entire island of its own in Tokyo). And probably this strange turn of events would accelerate his decision to do so. You see, one morning when he is late to catch his usual bus, he starts cycling only to find that there is a bomb underneath the seat. He can’t slow down or jump off because some automated and armed Segway is threatening to blow his brains off if he did. Then a miracle happened. A girl drops from the sky via parachute and pulls off a major stunt in destroying the Segway and at the same time grabbed Kinji away from the bicycle before it explodes. Wow. Don’t try this stunt anywhere, people. So the next scenes replay the events of how it lead to this. Kinji your normal kid, wants to be just that. Apathetic to life. Not looking forward to today’s opening ceremony. Can’t wait for the day he transfers out of Butei. Childhood friend and wife-wannabe, Shirayuki Hotogi pays him a visit, concerned about her ‘future husband’. Makes him lunch, warns him about having trouble with a girl (which insecure girl wouldn’t?), reminds him about the Butei Killer incident and though the original culprit has been caught, a copycat may strike again. But do you think with the bulletproof blazer and guns or swords that all Butei students are permitted to carry to school will make them safe? Kinji checks his mail. Probably checked too long so it would be the day he regretted missing the 7.58am bus. And the rest is history as we have seen. And in between the action of Kinji’s heart pounding chase, we have the handsome teacher of Butei’s Ambulance Division, Tooru Sayonaki explain the basics to the newbies about Butei. And unlike the police, Butei people work for money. Makes them no difference than a mercenary, eh? He signs off with an advice for everyone to be careful and not lose their lives. At least during their stay at Butei. Shows you how rough it’s going to get. Well, if you live by the sword, you die by the sword.

So when Kinji wakes up from his unconsciousness, he finds himself in a storeroom and his female saviour, Aria H. Kanzaki over him. Yes, Aria as you have guessed it by a mile is your typical tsundere when she mistakes Kinji for being a pervert. But no time for that because several Segway reinforcements corner them and start firing. As Aria fires her twin guns at them, her flat chests are leaning against Kinji’s face. No matter how flat, when a girl’s boobs are pressed against your face, you’re still going to get stimulated, right? Because of that, Kinji’s dreaded other personality awakens. He becomes cool, cocky but effective. Putting Aria aside, he coolly deals with the Segways himself while Aria is reduced to a sexual-harassment-crying blushing tsundere. She regrets saving this molester and tries to ‘kill’ him. If not her guns, but her twin swords. Something mind boggles me. If she is so petite, how the heck did she keep twin swords behind her back which is seemingly much longer than her body? Aria fails to ‘kill’ him as Kinji walks away. As explained, this mode that Kinji genetically inherits is called Hysteria Mode. He goes into this mode when he is sexually aroused. His physical abilities and intelligence increase many times fold and is able to pull off near-impossible superhuman stunts with deadly accuracy and effectiveness. So if this is such a cool feature, there must be something about this mode that makes him wish he was never born. Kinji thinks his troubles are over but as he enters class, Aria is the new transfer student and wants to sit next to him! The class goes wild upon misunderstanding Kinji did something perverted to her. Well, Aria had his belt with her (he gave it to her when her zipper was ruined during the Segways attack). Though Aria warns she’ll blast a hole in anyone if they start talking trash like that. The day ends even worse for Kinji. Aria barges into his dorm and wants to him to be her slave. So yeah, Shirayuki’s prediction of him getting trouble with a girl did come true.

Episode 2
Slave or personal butler, Kinji is forced to serve Aria to her whims and fancies. Maybe he has to if he wants to live. Normal life getting further and further… Aria wants Kinji to join her Assault Division and do Butei missions but that division is the reason why Kinji wanted to quite Butei altogether. Do you think Aria cares? Join her or else! Or else what? Yeah, he gets kicked out of his own dorm as punishment. So when Kinji returns, he finds Aria taking a shower. Remember his bad luck with girls? It’s going to get a lot worse because SHIRAYUKI IS AT THE DOOR!!! He tries to make an excuse that no other woman is living with him. But you can’t fool a woman’s intuition. Shirayuki remains suspicious and though she passes him his dinner, somehow Kinji manages to persuade her to go home. Thank God. At least no bloodshed broke out for now. Maybe for Kinji because he saw Aria naked when she came out from the shower. In the short period they are living together, Kinji himself notices he has gotten better in evading Aria’s attack! So it did do him some good, eh? Kinji thinks he can get away from Aria when she’s attending her Assault classes but looks like she raked in enough credits to graduate so she doesn’t need to attend them. Aria follows this E-rank Butei on his part time job of taking up odd jobs. This time to find a cat. Not very much credits but that’s the least he could do for his rank. So during the job, we have more tsundere from Aria. Need I elaborate? If she says she doesn’t need friends, why does she need him? Oh yeah. He’s her slave. At the end of the day, Kinji manages to find and rescue the cat. After he manages to lose Aria, he meets his flirty classmate, Riko Mine at a conservatory. In exchange for information on Aria, he gives this gothic loli fashionista some eroges she loves playing. Kinji learns of Aria’s nickname as Quadra because she uses twin guns and blades during her Butei mission in Europe. When Kinji goes back, he tells Aria what he knows about her. Mom is Japanese, dad is half-British, grandma receives the Dame title from the British Royal Family and she is S-ranked Butei, the highest rank of all. She also has never let a person escaped but she mentions Kinji being the first. Let’s say it has something to do with him being perverted. At least to her. Aria also noticed about his other mode and wants him to activate it. Seeing he doesn’t want to go into Hysteria, he agrees to join her. Though he will just be taking Assault as an elective and for just one mission. No matter how long or big, a mission is still a mission.

Episode 3
Riko gives Kinji a coupon for a crane game machine which expires today. Kinji’s old Assault buddies like Goki Mutou and Ryou Shiranui are happy to know he is back albeit he asserts it is just temporary. Aria continues to follow her slave and at the crane game, she sucks in getting the cat (or is it leopard?) plushies she wanted so much so our cool Kinji shows her how it’s done. Because Kinji somehow managed to get 2 plushies, happy Aria gives him one for his effort. Back home, Kinji notices his wall clock slower than his wristwatch. He adjusts his wristwatch and the next morning, he is puzzled he missed his usual bus. Deja vu? Yes it is. However this time the bomb is on the bus! His Assault friends are all on board. A message is relayed via one of the student’s handphone that the passengers mustn’t do anything rash and if the bus decreases its speed, the bomb will go off. And this time there is an armed Lamborghini firing up by the bus’ side if they do anything funny. Aria and Kinji go into action upon learning about the hijacked bus as Aria thinks the Butei Killer has strike again seeing the real culprit was never caught. As the bus heads to Odaiba, the Assault guys make calculations to disarm the Lamborghini when the bus enters the underground tunnel. However it backfired because the Lamborghini fires faster. If not for the bulletproof blazers, they could’ve been dead. Luckily Aria pulls up from behind and shoots the Lamborghini’s tire to put send it crashing. Then pulling off another stunt that nobody should ever do, both of them get on the bus while letting that expensive car they rode crash into the corner. They try to find the bomb and they need to find it fast because the bus is losing gas. Aria finds the bomb underneath the bus while Kinji finds a device transmitter on top. Then another Lamborghini pulls up from behind. Aria manages to fire and send it crashing before its bullets could reach them. Out of the tunnel, Reki of the Snipe Division pulls off an amazing sharp shooting accuracy through the tiny bridge frames as she fires a single shot to loosen the bomb as it explodes in the sea. Later Kinji learns Aria had asked Reki for help for the mission. Kinji visits Aria recuperating in hospital and reports of the incident yield no results in revealing the culprit. But Aria is disappointed in Kinji because she thought she could see him in Hysteria Mode though Kinji denies he has such power. Aria couldn’t care less about his decision to quit Butei because compared to hers, she is in a more dire situation and running out of time. Kinji is still bent on leaving so Aria notes that he isn’t the one she is looking for.

Episode 4
Kinji wakes up from a dream whereby his brother, Kinichi who was also part of Butei helped saved and evacuated a hijacked ship. Though he was the only one who died, society criticized and pinned the blame on him. Kinji sees Aria on the streets and follows her but of course she knows his tailing sucks. Seems Aria is visiting her mom, Kanae in jail. Aria believes her mom has been framed by the Butei Killer and if she can prove her innocence, she can help reduce her jail sentence from 864 years to 742 years! WTF???!!! Aria loves her mom very much and will do anything to free her but Kanae says she can’t do it alone and needs to bring out her inherited strength and the need of a skilled partner. Visiting hours is over so the policemen pull Kanae away much to Aria’s dismay. Kinji felt sorry for Aria so he goes to do some investigation over the Butei Killer and learns how reports printed that Kanae was arrested for crimes as Butei Killer. He also realizes Aria’s term for slave meant partner. Shiranui informs him that Aria is leaving for London tonight. Kinji goes to see Riko and he has to put up with her seduction and flirty ways if he wants to really know what happened to Kinichi. Riko purposely stimulates Kinji to awaken his Hysteria Mode. Even so, Kinji wastes no time in playing with her. With his heightened intelligence, he starts putting the pieces together and realizes Butei Killer’s next target is Aria’s plane. He manages to get on board at the last minute, much to Aria’s surprise. Since the case of Butei Killer hasn’t been solved, this means his first and only mission with Aria isn’t over. Though Aria feels she can handle this alone, she starts to get frightened by lightning. Well, nobody’s perfect. True enough, Butei Killer is on board and makes an announcement that the plane is hijacked. Kinji mentions about the Butei Killer’s method in not using electronic signals as remote control to avoid detection because the killer was on board himself. He also says the Butei Killer is challenging Aria from the start by forcing his own charges onto Kanae. When they corner the supposedly Butei Killer, she turns out to be Riko!!! How can such a cute girl be a villain?! Ah well, I’ve seen such cases before. Riko reveals she is the 4th generation of the famous phantom thief Arsene Lupin and the reason she’s doing all this was because she’s sick that everyone is calling her the 4th instead of her real name. Plus, she’ll be able to surpass her great grandfather if she beats them when their forefathers locked in a similar battle. So it was Riko who had been setting up things like the bomb on Kinji’s bike and the bus and the tampering of his clock in hopes of setting up Aria and Kinji together. Riko also says she was behind that ship incident and right now, Kinichi is her boyfriend. Because Kinji is close to being provoked, Aria faces off Riko in a close range gun firing battle. I wonder how long their bulletproof clothes will last. However Riko has a trick up her sleeve. She can use her hair to wield objects and this distracts Aria, allowing Riko to fire at point blank into Riko’s heart.

Episode 5
Kinji takes Aria away to a room and manages to revive her with some injections. Of course when she wakes up, she thinks he’s trying to do funny stuff on her. Do we have time for all this? Since she continues to be tsundere, Kinji kisses her to activate his Hysteria Mode. Soon the battle with Riko continues as the Assault guys receive word of the hijacked plane. The plane starts descending quickly. As Aria tries to control to plane, Kinji confronts Riko who is a step away from blowing the door for her escape. She wants him to join EU but he isn’t interested. So she bids farewell by blasting the doors and converting her uniform into a parachute! Cool fanservice! Oops. I mean, cool parachute conversion contraption. Seems EU has got a gift for them, a couple of missiles into the plane’s engines. Kinji goes to help Aria pilot the plane. A couple of Japan Air Self Defence Force escort and inform them to await further orders. Because the airwaves were jammed, Kinji borrowed a satellite telephone to contact Mutou. Reading the plane’s instruments, with the leaking fuel, they can last 10 minutes at best. They also let Kinji know that the government has considered the risk of a failed landing at a nearby airport and are preparing to shoot it down. In short, they have abandoned plans to save this flight and will either way shoot them down when they reach the Pacific Ocean. But Kinji plans on landing on an unused island with a flat open ground. With all the calculations, they have to land with precision. And those guys down at Assault have to do something for lighting because it’s damn dark. Somehow they manage to borrow whatever lighting equipments to light up the outline of the island as the plane inches closer. Have faith in the man. Well, it really does seem unbelievable that the plane stopped right at the edge of the island! So it’s perhaps no wonder Kinji must be recovering from this ‘shock’ as he looks out lethargically from his window. Aria mentions this incident proves Kanae was wrongly accused as the Butei Killer, she is here to wish him goodbye and will look for a new partner. However if he changes his mind, he can come be her partner. So I guess that’s it? Not interested? I guess it took him long enough to realize that he really needs her. No point yelling when she’s already flying off in her helicopter. Probably she had already calculated all this because she leaps off from the helicopter and into his arms! I wonder how many broken bones he got. So if you haven’t guessed it by now, The H. in Aria’s middle name stands for Holmes and yes, she is the fourth generation to that famous detective Sherlock Holmes. With one trouble over, another trouble comes. This time Shirayuki is going to slice Aria when she misinterprets Kinji living with another woman. Hell hath no fury as a woman scorned…

Episode 6
Well, it’s his room and the girls are tearing it up like nobody’s business. She how dangerous women can be? And all over for a guy. Not that Aria would admit anyway but will Shirayuki listen? So while the girls duke it out, Kinji just waits outside his balcony while narrating to us viewers that Shirayuki is from the line of Hotogi miko priestess, armed shrine maidens with super powers passed down from generations. Butei who can use such powers are called Choutei, just like how Riko did with her hair. So have the girls decide to calm down yet? All the furniture are good for the junkyard. Aria continues to deny Kinji is her lover and that he is just her slave but Shirayuki misinterprets this as something naughty. She only believes whatever Kinji says so all this could’ve been avoided if he just opened his mouth sooner. Well, she didn’t let him and was too infatuated in cutting down that cheater. But she might not be able to hold on to her sanity much longer since Kinji and Aria couldn’t deny the fact that they kissed. Though Aria assures she didn’t get pregnant (what era is she from?), Shirayuki faints because she can’t handle this much longer. While Butei is preparing for the Adseard Festival, Aria reads up on a book the truth of how babies are made. In her embarrassment, she takes it out on Kinji. Aria is part of the cheerleading squad for Adseard and she is going to train Kinji to control his Hysteria Mode. By hitting him suddenly as and when she likes. Call this reflex training. Is it really working? Nope. When Shirayuki is being called to see her teacher, Umeko Tsuzuri about her declining grades, Aria thinks this is chance to find her weakness. Throughout the day, Aria almost fell into several traps that she thinks Shirayuki has set. As the duo Eavesdrop inside the air ventilation space, they hear Tsuzuri worrying if she had received mail from Durandal, a kidnapper that targets powerful Choutei though he is just a rumour and no one has ever seen his true form. Tsuzuri feels she needs a bodyguard so Aria busts out from her hiding and offers to be one for free. Though Shirayuki dislike the idea, she agrees as long as Kinji be her bodyguard too. And that she also lives with him. Oh boy. This is getting messy. Seems Aria’s objective has changed to catch Durandal and reduce mom’s sentence to 635 years (at this rate of setting her free, it’s going to be a long road) and believes that super criminal really exists. Shirayuki becomes nervous and acting like Kinji’s new wife. You can tell the obvious discrimination in treatment between Kinji and Aria. Then a short flashback how Shirayuki started liking Kinji. Due to her strict rules living at Hotogi, she was not allowed outside the shrine but Kinji sneak her out to see the fireworks. Though she got scolded after that. Even so, she was happy he always came to play with her. Shirayuki accidentally sees Kinji half naked coming out from the toilet. She thinks of undressing herself to even the score. As they struggle, Aria comes back and misinterprets everything. She starts firing at him, causing that poor guy to jump out from his balcony and into the sea below!

Episode 7
Thanks to that, Kinji catches a cold. He thought Shirayuki left him a syrup for his cold when it was actually Aria. In school, Aria wants Kinji to search through Shirayuki’s mail since Durandal sends threatening mails before he kidnaps. But Kinji isn’t interested and notes Aria doing her cheerleading stuff rather than be Shirayuki’s bodyguard. Well, she had Reki doing it part time. More of Aria’s tsundere mood when she hears Kinji mistaking Shirayuki for nursing him and she snaps when he mentions Durandal doesn’t exists because nothing bad has befall Shirayuki for the past few days. She wants Durandal to exist because she wants to save Kanae so bad. If not, show him proof that he exists. Otherwise, he’ll guard Shirayuki himself throughout the festival. Shirayuki sure must like this, right? So they both go watch the fireworks that night and as Kinji goes to buy sparklers, Shirayuki receives an eye-opening SMS. Kinji comes back, they play the sparklers and Shirayuki mentions her predictions about him disappearing. She feared it was Aria but ever since she came into his life, he seems happier. Then she starts getting emotional, wanting him to have eyes only for her. But the build-up to the kiss is ruined when they are distracted by the sound of fireworks by several kids nearby. As Adseard begins, Kinji watches Shirayuki but didn’t think of anything would happen in this crowd. As he takes a break, he receives a farewell SMS from Shirayuki. Then Tsuzuri comes frantically to him, looking for Shirayuki who is now missing. She is asking if she has received any texts recently. Kinji remembers Aria’s words and he realizes his mistake. He calls Shirayuki but she doesn’t pick up. He regrets not protecting her seriously and not trusting Aria who tried so hard to convince him. He starts panicking but Reki fires a warning shot to calm him down before he loses sight of his goal and the effectiveness of his abilities. Reki mentions she saw Shirayuki entering a hangar minutes ago. Kinji suspects something amiss because this is not a place she would go. Rushing into the warehouse and heading down, Kinji sees Shirayuki meeting Durandal (hiding in the shadows). Shirayuki mentions she has fulfilled her part of the bargain so Durandal promises not to hurt the people at Butei especially Kinji. Durandal wants Shirayuki to join him. Kinji tries to stop her but the ground freezes with him. Before he could be dealt with the final blow, Aria protects him and it’s all part of her plan in using Kinji.

Episode 8
Seems Aria investigated how Durandal worked. When faced with multiple enemies, he splits them up and takes care of them one by one. So by removing herself as Shirayuki’s bodyguard, it was a ploy to lure him out. Though Durandal escapes, he starts flooding the area. Shirayuki is tied up as she admits she has to obey Durandal’s orders and keep this a secret or else he’ll blow up the academy and kill everyone. Kinji wants Aria to go after Durandal (because she can’t swim – not that she would admit it) while he picks the locks. The water is rising fast and it took Kinji this long just to pick one. More to go… Shirayuki wants him to leave her because even if she dies, nobody will cry for her. You think he’d believe that crap? When they’re completely submerged underwater, Kinji kisses Shirayuki to go into Hysteria Mode and instantly picks all the locks with ease. Should’ve done this in the first place dude. As they go up to the next floor, the wave temporarily separates them. But it isn’t long before they reunite and with Aria. Kinji’s heightened sense allows him to cut a piano wire trap before it could walk straight into it. Kinji notices something strange about Shirayuki and asks if her lips are okay. She answers nonchalantly so this is a sign Kinji knew this isn’t the real her (because the real Shirayuki will fluster if asked this sort of embarrassing topic). This Shirayuki is Durandal in disguise as she reveals she is the 30th generation of Jeanne d’Arc! So the French heroine got burnt at the stake in her twenties was just a cover up? And to think why my history sucks… From her speech, seems she is Riko’s ally. The real Shirayuki turns up to turn the tables so it’s 3 against 1. Jeanne escapes into the shadows once more with her smoke screen and activates the sprinklers. After Shirayuki heals Aria with her powers, Jeanne shows herself. I wanted to say she takes after Fate/Stay Night’s Saber but there are obviously lots of differences. But she’s a knight. Shirayuki plans on using her forbidden arts and doesn’t want Kinji to look as she fears he will hate her. This guy? Hate her? No way. Revealing her real name as Scarlet Miko, Himiko, she sets her swords on fire and clashes with Jeanne’s icy one. Kinji and Aria plan to strike when they run out of steam and that Shirayuki is probably saving energy for one last attack. Aria and Kinji move in to corner Jeanne and Shirayuki unleashes her secret art, Double Scarlet God of Hotogi to break Jeanne’s holy sword. So Kinji, are you scared after seeing that fiery fire? Well, just like watching the fireworks. Aria arrests Jeanne. They return to Adseard and the cheerleading event went on smoothly. Back in Kinji’s room, Shirayuki points out it was Aria who bought the syrup and not her. Aria makes a statement that she wants Shirayuki to be her slave too seeing that she needs more than 1 partner. Uh huh. Aria already duplicates a keycard to Kinji’s room. Look how happy she accepts it. But when Aria bans anything perverted, Shirayuki feels she is trying to get ahead of the game and mentions she also kissed Kinji. Then they start fighting as Kinji slowly tries to get out from harm’s way. Who knows the same thing happened. Aria starts shooting, he jumps out of the balcony. Splash! So you think having another partner will solve his misery?

Episode 9
Kinji is surprised when Aria wants him to visit the girl’s dorm. Without hesitation, Aria gets flirty with him and pins him down on the bed! But something is amiss! Aria got boobs?! Definitely not her! Why, it’s Riko! She’s back? She wants to do dirty things with him? She hasn’t changed, hasn’t she? With his Hysteria Mode activated, Riko reveals she didn’t kill anybody so the term Butei Killer for her is wrong. She’ll let him in on more information if he makes her his. Though she mentions she hate harem routes, Aria busts in to ‘save’ her slave. Riko distracts Aria with boob talk (something which the latter doesn’t have, I guess) and escapes. They track and chase after her. Up on a rooftop as the girls trade insults (including whimsical attention whore and flat-chested world record holder), Kinji steps in before they can blow each other’s head off. He realizes Riko probable has made a plea bargain, that’s why she is able to return to Butei. Plus, if Aria harms Riko without a valid reason, she’ll be considered to have committed a crime and this means her effort in clearing Kanae’s name will go to waste. Riko starts crying (hope it isn’t crocodile tears. Oh wait, is it?) and understands Aria’s predicament. Seems Riko got expelled from EU after losing to Aria and Kinji. Because of that, EU’s number 2, Vlad of Endless Sin took away Riko’s treasure. She wants to retrieve it and this means for them to team up with her. It’s like becoming an accomplice to a thief… Aria (in tsundere mode) thinks this is a trick by Riko to steal him away to her side and asserts he only belongs to her! Can’t help bring up that kissing incident with Shirayuki, can’t she? As Kinji sits for an exam, Riko secretly distracts him by seducing him. Yeah, a bad girl she admits. Or else she’ll scream that he’s doing weird things. And if he wants his pencil to the test, he has to take it tug at her cleavage. Consider this as training for him to control his Hysteria Mode before they pull off the big heist. The steamy affair is halted when Sayonaki spots them. Riko gives her fully answered sheet to him and dashes for the exit. That poor kid is going to get an earful after this. Riko has got the guts to show her face and share her umbrella with Kinji after his lecturing. Shirayuki happen to pass by and isn’t happy that another woman is sharing her umbrella with her beloved. She tries to throw Riko off about their kiss but Riko isn’t fazed and mentions they have reached second base. Shirayuki is shocked and this allows Riko to pull a prank and reveal her black panties. Kinji carries Shirayuki to the infirmary and somehow they got locked in. Shirayuki starts undressing herself thinking that they need to use their body warmth so as not to lose their strength. I guess she must be getting desperate to get intimate with Kinji before she returns to Hotogi for a while after breaking restrictions during the Durandal incident. Shirayuki is already down to her undies and forcing Kinji to strip but he tricks her he will do it himself as long as she closes her eyes. He escapes by sliding out the window so I guess Shirayuki will have to continue this when she comes back. Next day Aria and Kinji go meet Riko and they are surprised Riko in a maid outfit and a row of maids greeting them.

Episode 10
In the maid cafe, Riko discusses her grand robbery taking place at Vlad’s villa. She can’t do it herself? Well, she doesn’t have data for the underground so this is where the duo come in as they will infiltrate and steal the treasure, a rosary. Aria isn’t happy that first she framed her mom and now they want to steal her rosary. The reason she is doing this is because Riko agreed to testify for her mom (other than Riko’s flirty threat that she’ll do it with Kinji instead). Riko starts weeping that at least Aria could see her mom. She last her parents when she was 8, thus the rosary is a precious memento from her mom. Despite knowing that, Vlad took it away and hid it in a heavily guarded place. I guess it she was pitiful enough to warrant the duo to agree and do the heist. But they won’t get to see Vlad since he hasn’t been back for decades and it’s being manned by a manager and housekeepers. So to get them into task, Riko has reluctant Aria put on a maid outfit, in which she is darn embarrassed to do so (why is Kinji blushing?). Then she has practise lines that maids would normally say to their master. Looks like Aria’s stuttering the first syllable. Can she do it? Man, it’s going to be a long day. Finally when she eventually ‘mastered’ it, she’s like a cross between a lifeless zombie and a broken tape recorder. Now it’s Kinji’s turn for training. Riko wants him to the infirmary without anybody seeing him. On his way, he is surprised to see Jeanne playing piano in the music room. Don’t worry. She’s not the enemy and due to a plea bargain, she is made to attend Butei. Jeanne also knows what Riko wants (her freedom, that is), thus knowing about Kinji’s heist. She continues how after Riko’s parents’ death, she was taken in by someone claiming to be her relative (Vlad) but was imprisoned, malnourished and mistreated. She tried to escape but was caught and defeated in a fight. However Vlad promised he will no longer lay his hands on her if she proves she has surpassed Lupin the 1st (thus the hijacking incident). Jeanne is telling Kinji all this because he views Vlad as her descendant’s greater enemy. Guess what? Her descendents teamed up with Lupin’s to fight Vlad to a draw about 120 years ago. Vlad’s ancestor? No, Vlad himself. Is this guy human? Well, to put it in other words, he’s like a demon. Jeanne proceeds to draw a picture of Vlad’s weakness. Long ago, a paladin from the Vatican placed 4 permanent marks on him. The marks are his weakness. Good. So you have to hit the marks to defeat him. Easy, right? Nope. You have to hit them ALL simultaneously. Sheesh. In that case, shouldn’t the paladin just put up one mark? Why make life so difficult? Worse, Jeanne only knows 3 of the marks. Great. Looks like he’ll have to find the fourth one. Oh, her drawing sucks too.

Kinji hides in the closet at the infirmary when he hears Riko and the other girls coming. Urm… Why is Mutou in there too? Oh yeah, it’s a peeping feast to see the girls change. So this is his training? To control his Hysteria Mode? Kinji wouldn’t want to look but Riko sends him a naughty SMS that if he doesn’t reply what colour her panties are, she’s going to force open the locker! It’s honey gold! Then when Aria comes in and Riko forcefully laying her hands on her, Kinji instantly goes into Hysteria Mode. Ah, I guess I know what this means. Sayonaki comes in and all the girls start hounding him to take their samples or even more. Heck, they didn’t need to take off their clothes in the first place. However the guys are busted when Reki opens the locker. Oh sh*t. Unfortunately we don’t get to see the expected girls-pounding-the-pervert scene because a silver wolf crashes in and attacks them before escaping. Kinji chases it by borrowing Mutou’s badass bike with Reki tagging along. Reki’s sharp observation of the wolf’s whereabouts has Kinji arriving at a building under construction. Reki doesn’t have tranquilizers so she’s going to subdue the beast with normal bullets. This has Kinji remember emotions are foreign to her. As Reki gets into a sniping position, Kinji hunts for the wolf before realizing he walked into its trap. Though Kinji manages to retaliate, the wolf escapes but into Reki’s sniping range. She shoots but grazed its back. Did she really miss? Well actually it was on purpose. The bullet has applied some pressure points on the wolf so it is somewhat temporarily paralyzed. Reki tells the wolf she won’t miss the next shot so he wants it to give up its old master and serve her. Instantly, the wolf becomes tame! Woah! Not only she’s a sharp shooter but she has a thing with animals! She wanted to keep it as a pet that’s why she wanted to go after it. I’m sure she’ll get approval if she keeps it as a Butei dog. But Kinji has bigger problems to deal with when he gets home. Aria (very mad. Very) is waiting and wants the pervert to explain himself hiding in the closet. She thinks he was being horny for Riko so Kinji’s tongue slip has him revealed that it was Aria he is horny for. OOPS!!! Now she’s going to blow lots of holes through him. I wonder if his room is riddled with them already.

Episode 11
Wow. Aria is a natural maid now. All that practise must have paid off, eh? On the day they’re supposed to head to Vlad’s villa to stay for 2 weeks, Riko comes by in a disguise that Kinji recognizes as Kana. Who is she? Well, he’s reluctant to say. I know Riko’s disguise is to avoid Vlad recognizing her. But if Vlad isn’t going to be there, what point is this for? Arriving at the villa, they are surprised to see Sayonaki as the villa’s manager. So is he. Since the housekeepers are away for 2 weeks, that’s why it’s the perfect infiltration job. As they speak, I won’t say that Sayonaki is close to this villa’s owner but as Kinji puts it, some sort like email buddies. Seems Sayonaki frequently borrowed this place to do his research. Yeah, sorry he can’t accompany them because it’s back to his research while the duo make themselves at home. Hey, even Aria takes a liking to wear a maid’s outfit! Yeah, Kinji saw that embarrassing pose she did… As they continue to work in the villa, Kinji can’t help find himself getting stimulated easily by Aria. They also talk about Vlad’s weakness via that horrible drawing and some Kinji-Aria time when the lightning causes the place to blackout. Yeah, it’s her frightened mode getting all clingy to Kinji. A week later, Kinji and Aria report to Riko what their find via communicator. Aria confirms the rosary in the room but she can’t get it easily since Sayonaki is always busy with his research at the basement. Riko suggests a tactic of luring him out. As Kinji and Aria serve him dinner, they notice Romanian roses in the compound. Sayonaki mentions he cross-breed 17 of them and incorporated virtues in each of them. However he hasn’t name them but decides to named them after Aria seeing she can speak the same amount of languages. Back to the ‘meeting’, seems the basement is heavily guarded with infrared beams. So the plan is to have Aria lure Sayonaki out (because they think he’s skilled with women) while Kinji retrieves the rosary. All in 15 minutes. How can a plain flat chest Aria seduce him? As Riko suggested, let him grope her butt!!! Haha, is that a joke?

On the last day of their stay, Aria has Sayonaki accompany her to the rose garden while Kinji prepares to go in, Mission Impossible style (okay, he’s hanging upside down like a bat rather). Yeah, they’ve dug a hole for 2 weeks right down to the basement. Giving visuals to Riko, in turn she gives him complicated instructions to make some crane to retrieve the rosary. Time is up but Kinji needs more time. Aria tries to stall him but she isn’t good in striking up a conversation. Suddenly out of the blue, Aria confesses she likes Kinji and after this, she’ll let him do whatever he wants with her. Yeah, they can do it all night if he wants. This was enough to activate his Hysteria Mode. Kinji realizes that Riko impersonated Aria’s voice to turn him on seeing she noticed about it too. In this mode, Kinji is able to finish his job and even plant a fake rosary. You know, I thought he should have started in this mode to save time and trouble. Kinji and Aria meet Riko at the rooftop as they hand over her rosary, much to her delight. As gratitude, Riko wants Kinji to undo her ribbon. Upon doing so, she kisses him! In his Hysteria Mode, Riko apologizes for being a bad girl. Seems this is a setup. With her rosary back, she has all the cards in her hands. Yup, she used them both to retrieve her rosary so that she can proceed to defeat them both in this showdown. Looks like she hasn’t given up. Once a sly fox, always a sly fox.

Episode 12
Riko continues her explanation. Her torrid life living in a tiny cell eating nothing but rotten meat and drinking nothing but muddy water. The rosary is her descendant’s heirloom and she hid it in her mouth during her captivity all the time. That’s when she realized this rosary gave her powers and used it to escape prison. She reasserts that she will beat Holmes and surpass Lupin the 1st to earn her freedom. Suddenly she is stunned by electric jumper cables. It’s Sayonaki and he’s brought a pair of mean silver wolves with him. This solves that who-let-the-dog-out a couple of episodes back, eh? Now for the moment of truth. Sayonaki reminds weakened Riko that they met 10 years prior. He was a doctor who took her blood and gene samples. The result was though she is Lupin’s descendant, she inherited no powers and is only good for making a 5th. He knew of their plan to steal the rosary and allowed them. Sayonaki starts getting violent on Riko. He forces the fake rosary down Riko’s throat and steps on her! He wants her to sink into despair so he can summon Vlad. And the sign Vlad is coming is that Sayonaki becomes something like the Incredible Hulk. See his rippling muscles? Though Sayonaki isn’t Vlad, he is simply an outer shell Vlad created using genes he had obtained. He is just a personality to pass off as a human. The full Vlad is here. Looks like a big werewolf. Kinji must have learnt quickly from Reki so he fires a shot to paralyze and not kill the wolves. Aria is going to arrest him for framing Kanae. But can she? When Vlad mentions he wants to get Aria’s blood, Aria realizes his true form: A vampire. So he is Count Dracula? Only thing is that he harvested blood of humans and used their genes to evolve. That’s why he isn’t afraid of sunlight, garlic or silver bullets. Yeah, he’s like an immortal with his healing capabilities. Then Vlad picks Riko up and he isn’t going to keep his promise of freeing her because he wants her back in the cell to produce a 5th. Poor Riko is so devastated that she pleads to Aria and Kinji to save her. I guess they were waiting to hear this. Otherwise, why would they stand at the sides, watch her get deservingly beaten up? Aria fires a few shoots into Vlad while Kinji takes Riko away. Kinji manages to steal the real rosary and pass it back to Riko. Though she knows Vlad is strong, she believes the duo can defeat him and tells of his fourth weak spot: Inside his chest.

Kinji rendezvous with Aria as they aim to hit all 4 spots simultaneously. However Vlad still stands and mocks them that a certain b*tch didn’t really know his other weak spot. Disappointed? Vlad counter attacks and the impact was strong enough to dispel Kinji’s Hysteria Mode. Uh oh. Kinji is thrown off the edge but Aria has to be kept busy on her toes because Vlad is swinging like mad. Riko dives down to save Kinji. Remember her cool gadget for fanservice, oops I mean parachute? Yeah, that. Kinji wants to save Aria and Riko gets her confidence back after having Kinji repeat her name several times. Has he ever called her by a number? Riko swoops down in time before Aria is smashed (she got frightened when the lightning flashes). Then she gets horny with her by licking her neck not because she is yuri but rather to activate Kinji’s Hysteria Mode. I guess it activates even further when Kinji lands on Aria’s boobs. Oh wait. Does she even have them? Don’t shoot me! Kinji knows where Vlad’s final weak point is and since each of them have a bullet left in their gun (Aria has 2, remember?), that’ll be just swell. But he wants them to fire at the same spot like they did at first. Kinji’s bullet causes Aria’s bullet to Vlad’s chest to ricochet off into Vlad’s mouth. Yup, his fourth weak point is on his tongue. Vlad experiences violent spasms before he collapses in his own bloody pool. Kinji realizes his weak point while fighting him. He was always trying to guard his mouth when they’re shooting. If he had unlimited healing power, then he shouldn’t need to do that, right? So aiming at the same spots was just to catch him off-guard. Kinji and Aria note to Riko that she has surpassed the 1st because she has defeated Vlad though it was a combined effort. Riko is back to her sneaky ways and the only thing she’ll acknowledge is that they are on par as her rival. Though she escapes, Kinji is sure she’ll be back soon. In the aftermath as Kinji accompanies Aria to buy swimsuits, he thought he saw Kana but dismisses it. Aria is elated when she receives good news that Riko agrees to testify for Kanae that guarantees her a remand. So happy that her bra pads drop out. Kinji doesn’t know what these are so embarrassed Aria slaps him so many times that you’d probably lost count. Hey, it’s better than shooting holes through him, right?

Episode 13
This is actually an OVA episode that came with the DVD and Blu-Ray release. If you’re hoping for fanservice and love triangle romance, forget it. First they lure you with that and then you slowly realize it’s some sort of supernatural horror! CREEPY! Kinji, Aria, Mutou, Shirayuki, Riko, Tsuzuri, even Jeanne along with Reki and her wolf pet are driving up the misty mountainous roads on a stormy day. The radio transmission is screwed and the GPS ran havoc. Tsuzuri are bringing the kids to not just a hotspring trip but a Butei training exercise. They reach the village on a clear sunny day. Trekking to the village, Riko and Shirayuki get into an argument about wanting to do in Kinji even if it’s in the middle of the road. I can see why Riko loves teasing gullible Shirayuki on this subject. She hates to lose out whenever the subject is on him. In the seemingly deserted village, they meet the Landlady who is supposedly Tsuzuri’s old acquaintance and partner who quit Butei long ago because she like her ancestors prefer to run their business in hotspring. She might not look like it but she’s 60 years old! F*ck! Tsuzuri allow everyone to relax today and training will begin tomorrow. So yeah, the usual hotspring fanservice whereby Riko and Jeanne are too focused on Shirayuki’s boobs, leaving that flat chest Aria out in the cold. Till Tsuzuri mentions how childish they are talking about boobs because mature women’s boobs are… Wrinkled? Aria blows her top and starts shooting but luckily everyone have something bulletproof to deflect the shot. Bulletproof soap? Bulletproof shampoo? Bulletproof headphone? Why is everything bulletproof?! Who needs guns then?! Mutou is the typical pervert who is never going to let this chance slip as he begins his peeping reconnaissance while Kinji tries hard not to hear all those ambiguous sounds from the women’s side. Don’t want to enter into Hysteria Mode, do you? Mutou thinks he is about to succeed till he sees Landlady at the top of the fence and his plan is foiled. Later the girls play ping pong (I don’t know the pose and “Heh~” scream they make) and when they go get something to drink, they feel as though like somebody is watching but dismiss it. However in the shadows there is a creepy little boy watching them!!! OH SH*T!!! Is this hotspring haunted?!

The girls realize that Jeanne is missing and soon hear Mutou’s scream. Everyone rushes to where that guy is as they see Jeanne part of the floral statue! But soon Jeanne returns to her normal self though she has no recollections of what happened. They laugh at her for doing such an extreme cosplay. Reki’s wolf starts snarling at something close by. As the girls talk to Jeanne what happened, Riko thinks this is part of Tsuzuri’s training to catch them with their guard down despite telling them training is tomorrow. Then Kinji comes in to ask if they have seen Mutou because that dude suddenly disappeared. Looking for him, suddenly Mutou’s unconscious body comes dropping from the ceiling. And he is put in a weird dress. The rest has had enough and think the adults have gone overboard and prepare to make their move on them. Kinji is supposed to distract the ladies but finds they are not in their room. The place is messy. Shirayuki opens the closet and to everyone’s horror, Tsuzuri and Landlady are tied up and hanging. S&M? I don’t think it’s this horrible. Noting something really amiss, they see a boy nearby and wonder who he is. He didn’t say and runs away. They chase. The boy leads them deeper and deeper into the rooms. Aria and Kinji realize they have been separated from the rest when they enter a room filled with creepy dolls, talisman on the wall and sounds of crying baby!!! F*CKING CREEPY SH*T!!! Then a door slides open and a corpse-like hand is going to grab them!!! Suddenly! Everyone finds themselves sleeping in the MPV. It’s like they just arrived at the village. Though they feel pretty odd, they make their way to the inn but only realize that there are more people in the village now (there were no one around before). They meet the Landlady and wonder if she’s going to come at them suddenly seeing they know she’s an ex-Butei and 60 years old. Landlady isn’t happy that Tsuzuri told her students unwanted things. As everyone continues to wonder what the heck is happening, the little boy is seen still peeking around the corner. Aw, man! Don’t tell me this is going to be another horror loop!

If I don’t do a good review, she’s gunner blow holes through me…
Ah, man. So that is how it ends? So sudden? The OVA certainly didn’t help either. Well, I read an article that a second was being planned. However! Yes, there’s a catch to it. As being said by the series’ author, the development of the second season depends very much on the DVD and Blu-ray sales of this season! Oh damn! That is the harsh truth but really, if it’s not profitable in the first place, why go on and produce something that not only wastes money but lacks popularity? I mean, a dip in sales could mean that the series wasn’t popular, right? So yeah, I haven’t been following up on this and since I haven’t heard anything, which means… Or maybe it’ll take longer. Like 10 years later. Haha! So people, if you love your tsundere flat chest Aria, show your support and buy the DVDs and Blu-rays so we can have more of the goodness that is of Aria. Oh, and perhaps if you’re a Riko fan, do you not want to see more of her cheeky flirt? The silent type, eh? Maybe Reki will get more screen time then. So what are you waiting for? Dig deep into those pockets and start supporting the production of the sequel! Hmm… I do sound pushy, don’t I? As for me, I’m not really a big Aria fan so count me out :).

So back to the sudden abrupt season ending analysis. So sudden that it made me go “THAT’S IT?!” when the end credits start rolling. It’s not like it’s the kind of ending credits which are usually unique to final episodes in most anime series. For example, seeing the life-goes-on of the characters. Basically the ending credits for the last episode of this series is the same as it was you’d see in the first, second and all the other episodes. And there is no epilogue teaser to say or show anything (I wouldn’t count that Kana scene). That’s why I said the ending is very sudden. So what happened to Vlad and Sayonaki? Don’t tell me they disappeared? Oh, it’s the elusive Vlad we’re talking about. Now that Kinji has discovered Vlad’s weakness, I’m sure he is the first person over the centuries and generations to have figured this out, so please feel free to post online on every forum board and websites so that anybody who is lucky (or unlucky) enough to fight Vlad face to face would at least know where to hit instead of gambling and hitting random spots on his body. I bet that will be the last you’ll see of him. But Vlad being a vampire? I thought that was just too much. The final arc was quite focused on Riko getting back her rosary and the battle with Vlad so much so it could make you forget that there ever was a Butei Academy in the first place. That there was a cool sniper girl named Reki. That there was a miko priestess and ‘desperate’ childhood friend named Shirayuki. And do we know anything about the EU in the end aside that it’s some bad organization? None of these were ‘seen’ in the end that’s why it made me feel so, here’s that word again, sudden. Maybe they do really had plans to make a sequel and the ‘suddenness’ was a midway point. Yeah, money is always the issue, eh?

It was amusing to see the interaction between Aria and Kinji. This is what you should look for when watching this kind of shows, right? Two people reluctantly partnering up eventually grow closer. It is obvious that if there were any pairings to be made, it would be these 2. The rest are just for ‘decorations’. Haha! Aria being the tsundere isn’t honest to her feelings till the end. Though she may have called him “slave” lesser, maybe it’s because she calls him “pervert” more. Whatever name she calls, I’m sure she treats him like her partner. At least when the need arises for it. And so for Kinji who has been thinking of quitting Butei, at this rate I think he isn’t going to quit because this single mission to help Aria could turn into a lifelong one. Kanae was sentenced to hundreds of years in prison and by capturing criminals to prove her innocence, as the years are reduced, it feels like they need to continue this till their next generation. And Kinji didn’t come to hate his Hysteria Mode as much as he did in the beginning. At times with his heightened intelligence and abilities (not to mention the personality) it saves his behind and solves cases that his normal mode wouldn’t. It’s good, right? I wish I had this mode too. But he didn’t really get to control it because he just needs to be a little stimulated by Aria and wahlah! It’s activated. Maybe he couldn’t control it ever in the first place. Just that he started liking Aria so it activates faster. Now the next step is to get them to confess to each other… Seems like a long shot even if there ever is a sequel.

Some of the other supporting characters are given their fair share of screen time albeit it is still mainly Aria and Kinji. We get to see Reki do some accurate sniping, Shirayuki unleashing her forbidden fire techniques and the other pals at Butei working together to overcome dire straits. That’s the good thing when you have friends who truly believe in you not just because it is some Butei Law number so and so to always help out one another. It’s hard to hate Riko even if she acts like an antagonist. Firstly, she’s cute! Who could hate such a sexy babe? Okay but seriously, once you understand her pain and past, you will understand why she was so desperate to have her showdown with Aria. Then when she found out all her actions have been for nothing, the despair you see in her eyes just makes your heart sink. Sure, she got what she deserved but getting beaten to a pulp and relishing in her pain isn’t something anyone would stomach. It goes to show that one bad deed deserves another. She lied to Aria at first, right? So how does it feel to have a taste of her own medicine? All she wanted was people to acknowledge her by her real name and not some number. It was amusing and fun seeing Shirayuki trying to get close to her sweetheart Kinji and of course getting worked up and jealous when other women get too close to him. She had her chance but I guess we all know how it will turn out, right? Reki is an oddball in her own way. Though she lacks emotions, letting an enemy wolf live so that she could make it her pet indicates otherwise, right? She is such a mystery and I would have loved to know how she is able to communicate with animals so easily. I mean, communication isn’t just about words. It’s about feelings and emotions too.

The action in this series does not disappoint and they are thrilling enough to make you captivated. Adrenaline junkies should be kept satisfied with the amount of gun firing action the series has to offer. Don’t twin wielding gun girls look cool? Just like Black Lagoon’s Revi or Bakuretsu Tenshi’s Jo. You could say that whenever Butei goes into action, it will be an explosive affair. Who could forget Reki’s precision sniping? This has got to be the best action bit for me and no matter how impossible and exaggerating, it looks totally cool nevertheless. With the adrenaline pumping background music, you can’t help cheer for the Butei heroes and heroines to come out tops. There are some fanservice moments as well but if you will be sorely disappointed and annoyed by the censors. But it’s not like every panty shot is ‘bright out’ because they do let some slip through and let you ‘enjoy’ the view. So here is another motivation for you ecchi fans to buy the DVDs and Blu-rays. Want to bet those scenes are 100% viewable? Possible they may even throw in additional fanservice scenes for your money’s worth. Just don’t let your parents or girlfriend find out about it or they’ll start blowing their top and blow holes through you. But as for the OVA, the fanservice isn’t much and the most you could see is the smooth butts of the girls. However you’d forget that since the horror part will scare you enough to lose your memories on that. The next episode preview is a short amusing section as we have the characters rant away. The best one has got to be when Aria forgave Kinji for his lecherous ways simply because she thought he had a thing for Mutou (the reason they were hiding in the closet doing ambiguous stuff)! Also another good one has to be when Aria loses her memories. Now, you have to have prior knowledge on Rie Kugimiya’s roles in other anime series to understand this one. Okay, not so much on her but her ‘partner’ to her tsundere characters. She’s trying to remember the names of her partners. Yuuji? Saito? Oh yeah, it’s Ryuuji. Who?

Rie Kugimiya as Aria needs no introduction as she’s a veteran in voicing loli roles and is perfect in another one of her trademark roles. Junji Majima is the voice behind Kinji. He also played Ryuuji in Toradora. So get that little joke now? Other casts include Mariya Ise as Riko (Levi in Fairy Tail), Mikako Takahashi as Shirayuki (Ayumu in Hayate No Gotoku), Kaori Ishihara as Reki (Suzuna in Kaichou Wa Maid-sama), Ayako Kawasumi as Jeanne (Saber in Fate/Stay Night) and Kenji Nojima as Sayonaki/Vlad (Tomoya in Clannad). Surprisingly the opening theme, Scarlet Ballet by May’N is quite to my liking. Most probably it’s because of the orchestral strings that increase the dramatic effect. If you know that Australian/British string quartet, Bond and their hit remix song Victory, I’m sure you’ll get an idea of how this piece will sound like. The ending theme is Camellia No Hitomi by Aiko Nakano and is a totally hard rock piece with heavy metal-like electric guitar play.

Life is already tough when you have to live your daily life armed. Having an academy like Butei, it feels like it has made the world even more dangerous. Even the school itself is a dangerous place. Imagine this. If the people at the top are rotten, then it has defeated every purpose to make this world safe. Look at the case of Sayonaki. And if Butei has a habit of making plea bargains and have ex-criminals enrol in the school, isn’t it like a big institute with world class felons? Hmm… Maybe I should take up some self defence martial arts class just in case. Then again, thinking about the time and effort needed to spend for all that just for a little peace of mind makes me feel lazy and lethargic. Maybe I should just hire Aria for a job, eh? Yeah, got to buy more DVDs and Blu-rays of the series before she blows lots of holes through me.

Before the start of the second season which is supposed to start in January 2012, there has been a release of a special episode called Tantei Opera Milky Holmes OVA. Yes, this single episode was enough to send back flooding memories about a bunch of ‘useless’ detective lolis even if they carry the great names of their famous detective forefathers. So bumbling and retard that their clumsiness and screw ups are the source of comedy and hilarity of the series. Do we really blame their lost of Toys or is it just them?

I’m not sure if this OVA is set after the events at the end of the TV series or somewhere in between. There was one flashback scene whereby it was from the final episode of the TV series (that was what I remembered) but then again at the end of the show, there is a next episode preview, which is one of the middle episodes in the TV series. Since this OVA is about Kokoro, I remember there was one episode whereby Irene kidnapped Kokoro so could it be a continuation from there? So could this be a missing episode in between or just something random. Heck, I couldn’t care less about that as long as they bring in the laughs.

The episode starts off with Tsugiko, Hirano and Saku preparing to infiltrate a heavily guarded mansion. It is a mission to rescue Kokoro taken as hostage. Probably the guards are just for show because the trio dispatches them easily like pros and when they arrive at the main room, their shock wasn’t seeing Milky Holmes at the scene but rather Kokoro happily singing like an idol in front of happy Irene. Uh… What’s going on? Anyway everyone is so thrilled by Kokoro’s singing that they join in the dance!!! WTF?! Till they realize each other. The girls are reprimanding Irene for kidnapping Kokoro but the smart girl gives and excuse that she found her unconscious on the road. Though, she was the one who made her that way. As for Kokoro, what’s with that getup? Feeling embarrassed? I’m sure she was just making up an excuse that they took too long to rescue her and thus dressed up like an idol to catch Irene off guard. Excuses, excuses… Well, Irene had 2 reasons why she ‘kidnapped’ Kokoro. Firstly, she’s cute (everyone has their weird fetishes) and secondly, her father’s company is going bankrupt. Again? The gold that she found was confiscated by the government. So Irene thought of turning Kokoro into an idol to scrounge up some money. Well, it’s not like Kokoro approved of it. Has she got a choice?

Back at the police headquarters. Seems G4’s office has been reduced to a narrow and cramped room. After all their failures and Kokoro’s recent kidnapping, I guess G4 has fallen down the ranks and got ‘reassigned’. The room is even smaller than Milky Holmes’ run down attic… Anyway Kokoro is shouting at the top of her lungs that she’s a police officer, bla bla bla, some unimportant flashbacks, bla bla bla, something about her IQ that has lots of zeroes in it (I agree with the zeroes and not any other number) that astounds those Harvard guys. Sheesh. You’re making the room feel even more cramp! Because her teammates aren’t interested, Kokoro threatens that she may take up Irene’s offer as an idol. You know what? They still don’t care! They don’t give a damn. Not a single sh*t! Kokoro panics and throws in a desperate move by saying that they’ll be lonely without her. Aren’t they going to stop her? Not interested… So much for friends. So how? I guess Kokoro is really desperate for some assurance so much so she ran down to Holmes Detective Academy to ask Milky Holmes if they will be lonely if she’s gone. Loser… Their reaction? They are ecstatic that she’s awakened to her idol side! Yeah, Nero wants to make character goods and sell them for profit! $$$ Ching! Ching! Even worse, Sherlock will support her all the way if that’s what she wants to achieve her dream. Fine. If that is how everybody wants to be, Kokoro slams her golden mask on the ground and calls it quits.

Soon Kokoro becomes the new idol in town, mesmerizing and racking up fans faster than filing up a glass of water. She attends lots of talk shows, lots of publicity and her face is literally everywhere in town. Kokoro! Kokoro! Kokoro! Come on. You want to cheer on her too, right? Yeah, that autography and hand shaking session has swelled her right hand. And you thought texting was the only reason that could sore your hands and fingers this big. While Irene is fawning over Kokoro, her dad is ecstatic that he can finally free himself from bankruptcy with all the money they have made. Milky Holmes is part of the crowd waiting to catch a glimpse of Kokoro coming out from the backstage into her limo. Sherlock calls out to her and her natural reaction was to protect herself from her gold mask. That didn’t happen. Did Kokoro hear her at all? Well, she’s in a different world now. So different that Sherlock feels somewhat empty. But why the heck is she bumming around at the cramp room of G3 (the new name for the police girls minus Kokoro)?! It’s already so cramp, they don’t need another one to fill in Kokoro’s shoes! Yeah, she’s annoying too… As Sherlock is feeling sad that Kokoro has gone away, Henriette reminds her of her duty to become a detective and not blame her uselesslesslesslessless-ness on someone else. This has Sherlock pondering the meaning of duty and dream.

The day of Kokoro’s concert, Arsene and her team steal Yokohama’s Red Shoes Riding Hood. Milky Holmes goes into action but they weren’t startled. Instead, they’re happy that they’ve found the meaning of duty and dream. Their duty as detectives and Kokoro’s dream of being an idol. What? Kokoro sees a news report of the battle between Phantom Thief Empire against Milky Holmes and G3. Looks like deep down in her heart, she is itching to get back into the action but Irene shuts the TV and passes her the mike. It’s idol time. Kokoro sings her heart out on stage while the battle rages on outside the stadium. Milky Holmes lives up to their useless reputation by getting beaten to a pulp. I’m wondering why Tsugiko and Hirano are fighting against each other? Saku is left ‘paralyzed’ when her lollipop is taken away from her mouth. Like taking candy from a baby, eh? Then the large screen in the stadium shows the battle outside. Kokoro stops for a while and is concerned but remembers that they didn’t give a damn about her because they didn’t even try to stop her from leaving. As she continues singing, she hears Sherlock confronting Arsene. Barely standing herself, Sherlock pours out her feelings on Kokoro. She didn’t want her to quit as a police officer and wanted her back because she was lonely (who else is going to hit her with the golden mask?). However she didn’t want to stop her from fulfilling her dream to become the world’s number one idol. So in order to put her at ease and not them see them in this pitiful state (too late girls), they have got to pull it together. For the sake of her dream. But Arsene doesn’t give a sh*t and kicks her away. Milky Holmes regroups and dart towards Arsene and her men. Look how cute they are dashing in tears, no? At that moment, Kokoro’s heart twitched. She knew what she wanted to do.

Before both sides could clash, a microphone is thrown between them. A girl in a golden mask stands before them. Heck, everyone can tell it’s you Kokoro. Then she throws her mask at Arsene but it hits Sherlock! Haha! I guess it’s her destiny to get whacked by it after all. So didn’t Kokoro give up being an officer? Well, she did not say she quit (eh? I thought she did? Did she forget?). That’s right, she’s back as a police officer. Oh boy. Milky Holmes and G3 are happy to see her and rush towards her to pester her for a plan. But being the stupid heroines they are, Arsene and her men got away scot free with the statue. Bummer. Another black mark in their records. Meanwhile Irene’s dad is in tears once more because he’s on the verge of bankruptcy. Something about he flopped big time selling his assets via foreign exchange. Maybe he should just leave running his company to Irene. As for that little smart girl, she isn’t giving up on Kokoro yet. Kokoro is back with a vengeance in the little cramp room. Yes, she’s laying down her goals but why the heck is Milky Holmes doing here? How cramp can the room get with 8 lolis in it?! While Sherlock is glad to have her back, Nero isn’t too happy because without her being an idol, all the character goods she made are now useless. Yup. She’s here to hand an invoice for the materials to make the goods. Yeah, why the hell must she pay! Lastly, Milky Holmes is watching a musical programme whereby Kokoro is supposed to star in and say her final goodbye to her fans. But it turns out to be Mori Arty making her debut song. The girls are taken in by her cuteness.

Idol Reject!
Yes, this OVA definitely lives up to its hype and serves as an appetizer before the second season. I’m very much anticipating to catch that to see more useless action from the bunch. They may be useless but they’re doing it in an annoyingly cute way so I guess that’s okay :). So basically this episode has Kokoro in focus as an idol though it feels as though she’s just trying to get back at her comrades for not caring enough for her. At moments you feel that even though she’s doing a fine perfect job as one, there is hesitation in her looks that could indicate that she misses the good ol’ police job. However if you really ask me, the police could be better off without her! Yeah, she should just join the Milky Holmes and become one big bungling family. On another note, I don’t think Kokoro would be good in any other jobs she ventures in. Haha! Is that an insult! Don’t worry, we all love you as much as we love Milky Holmes. Because of their twisted never-give-up attitude, it’s hard not to cheer for them. Looks like Arsene has still got a long way to make those loli detectives back to where they once were famed for. Oh, looks like they really stole the statue for good.

I think the number 130 is the number of the series. I don’t know what obsession Kokoro has with this number but this time her IQ level in this OVA just blew up to 1,300,000,000,000!!! I don’t even know how to pronounce this number. Then there are other times this number denomination appears like shaking hands with 1,300 people and her 130,000,000 copies of her debut CDs were sold. I thought the final number on Nero’s invoice should be 130,000,000 Yen instead of 38,000,000 Yen… The Gentlemen Thieves rarely had their screen time here. But it’s a good thing because it means we see less of Twenty’s self loving and distasteful nipples caressing antics. Well, there is one scene that he is scene kissing his life size bolster. So until then, my dream is that Milky Holmes never regain their Toys and continue fumbling in every mission and earn themselves a name in the Guinness Book of Records for being the most unreliable detectives in history. Or else they can quit and try being an idol. And fumble all over again.

Tantei Opera Milky Holmes

September 4, 2011

Who is the greatest phantom thief ever? Lupin, you say? What about the greatest detective? Detective Conan? Even if there is a cross-over movie about their battle of wits, this blog isn’t about them. Instead, where in the world would you find the world’s greatest fictional detectives of Sherlock Holmes, Cordelia Gray, Hercule Poirot and Nero Wolfe coming together as a team and combating and solving crimes together? In Tantei Opera Milky Holmes, that is! Well, at least their descendants.

In a typical detective comedy anime genre, we have Sherlock Shellingford, Cordelia Glauca, Hercule Barton and Nero Yuzurizaki as the quartet of the famous Milky Holmes team and of the famed Holmes Detective Academy which hones future detectives. Yes, not only they have their great forefathers as their background status, in this anime, the existence of Toys that grants users superhuman abilities and strengths. And thus, our Milky Holmes has always been protecting the city of Yokohama by thwarting the Phantom Thief Empire group, led by enigmatic and sexy Arsene and her band of fellow ‘gentlemen’ thieves consisting of swordsman Stone River, fire explosives expert Rat and the very-annoying, very-vain, self-proclaimed-most-beautiful-thing-in-the-world stripper but craft card magician Twenty.

Episode 1
However, Milky Holmes grand luxury life at the academy comes to a rude and abrupt halt. About a month ago while battling Arsene and her underlings to stop them from stealing a prized museum jewel, the detectives suddenly lost their Toys. As a result, Phantom Thief Empire got away scot-free with the jewel. Which also means, they’ve become relatively ‘useless’ and nothing but typical loli dykes. I mean, back at the academy, they get up late for class, take things for granted, blame each other and are even clumsy. Get what I mean? I guess it is part of Arsene’s plan to ‘revive’ their Toys back as the quartet infiltrate the academy grounds as school staff. Arsene as Henriette Mystere the student council president, Stone River as Ishinagare the gardener and cook, Twenty as Kai Nijuuri the sick-stripping homeroom teacher of Milky Holmes and Rat as Nezu their classmate (yeah, just Japanese translation of their original names). Perhaps the best phantom thief wants to only fight the best cream of the crop detective team so I suppose that’s why Arsene is ‘working real hard’ to get their Toys back as they were trained by the legendary detective Kobayashi Opera (note at all their awards and certificates decorating the room). Losing their Toys even makes them worse off than before as they don’t even fare well in their studies. Henriette notes that though they have been skilled detectives, the pampered lives in their dorms may have caused them to fall greatly. Thus she puts the Milk Holmes team to a test to diffuse a time bomb in any way they can. If they are successful, they will continue to enjoy the privileges that they deserved as the famous detective, otherwise they will stand to lose everything simply because, you can’t house a bunch of useless good-for-nothing lolis if they can’t even produce a simple result, right? Yeah, no special favour. Besides, it’s to see if their separation from Toys is a temporary one or not (what the heck is that useless uselesslessless uselesslesslessness tongue twister?!). Try as they might and no matter how hard, they couldn’t use their Toys and in the end the bomb explodes (ripping their certificate). Henriette announces their expulsion. However to be fair, she gives them 3 months to improve in which failure means absolute expulsion. Milky Holmes are grateful to her that they have a second chance. That is just the good news. Everything else, goes downhill from now. They have been kicked out of their individual rooms and are now placed in a creaky humid attic. Yeah, now they have to share a bed. They start blaming each other if the other had stopped the bomb in time but Sherlock says not to fight among themselves and that they promised each other to cooperate and become fine detectives. Well, better start working hard. Three months isn’t a long time.

Episode 2
Erm… Do we see them striving their best to amend the wrongs? Nope. Instead, we see them fighting over little food crumbs. Yeah, food has become such a scarcity. How does it feel like to live the life of the poor? As for Phantom Thief Empire, they’re making headlines with their steal once more. Hey, Milky Holmes isn’t there to stop them anymore, right? In school, more food woes for Milky Holmes. Not only they have been put at a rundown table, their food ration has been significantly decreased! From a roast pork to just a little potato? Be grateful, damn it! Yeah, they’re really breaking apart. Then in class, it’s no more first class tables but broken and shabby ones. On the positive side, since mushrooms are growing out of it, why not collect them and make a mushroom meal? Ever thought of it being poisonous? Heck, who cares? Hungry lolis can’t complain. And Nijuuri is upset that they’re cooking the mushrooms in the middle of art class (?!) than drawing his beautiful body. Sicko. WTF?! Sickly erected nipples?! Oh God?! Somebody stop this guy! It’s a sin not to look at his beautiful body?! WTF?! Milky Holmes are punished and as usual they argue. Later Sherlock finds a stray kitten and brings it home. Calling it Kamaboko (some fish paste – all they ever think about is food now), the little kitten does wonders in their strained relationship as the quartet are happy just with Kamaboko around. Plus, they have to keep it a secret since dorm rules disallow them to keep pets. Then one day, Ishinagare finds that the bread for other students are stolen and accuses Milky Holmes for stealing them due to their quarrel the other day (“I will sell my soul to the devil just to eat those bread”). Other ambiguous actions also points to them like Cordelia not hungry and Hercule not stopping their wrongdoings. However Cordelia notices the real culprit stealing bread in the background: Kamaboko. For the sake of the kitten and her friends, she decides to take the blame and admits she is the thief. She is thrown into prison while the rest try to bail her out. But seeing that they’re great (make that ex) detectives, they decide to do some good old investigation. Anyway their methods suck. Eventually the trail of bread crumbs lead them back to their attic as they see Kamaboko happily eating the bread it stole. Then they see a (lousy) sketch from Cordelia, how she values their friendship and realized she took the blame. And Cordelia must be going crazy since she manages to draw and fantasize her noble act as a great saviour. Maybe it’s just self-gratification after all. Soon Cordelia is released. As Henriette learns the truth and true culprit, she too admits that she is wrong for jumping to conclusions without doing proper investigations. But she asserts that keeping pets are still prohibited. However if the pet has already found a place to settle down, then it can’t be helped. You know what this means, right? Hooray. They can keep Kamaboko. And everybody goes back to have a good night’s sleep in their cramped bed while Stone River undergoes more self training for making such a blunder.

Episode 3
As they watch the news, a group of policewomen known as Genius 4 or G4, led by Kokoro Akechi, Tsugiko Zenigata, Hirano Hasegawa and Saku Tooyama are confident of nabbing Phantom Thief Empire since Milky Holmes weren’t able too. Plus, Kokoro is badmouthing the detectives and even showing them the middle finger (blurted out of course)! Milky Holmes invited themselves to help out but gets into all sorts of blunders and traps. This time the museum is heavily guarding a Venus-like statue. Kokoro doesn’t like those useless lolis one bit (always smacking Sherlock with her golden mask each time she calls her Kokoro-chan) and decides to play a devilish prank on them to regain their toys about playing some Twister-like game based on a Pharaoh’s lithograph. All lies! But Milky Holmes sincerely believed her! Makes you wonder how the heck they became cream of the crop. Did they lose their intelligence to when they lost their Toys? Milky Holmes obediently listen and do all the stretching Twister moves in hopes of getting their Toys back, much to Kokoro’s amusement. Finally the whole ‘process’ fails when Hercule couldn’t do a move which puts her in an embarrassing sex-like position and causes everyone else to fall. G4 gets back to work while Nero blames Hercule for her failure. Then Phantom Thief Empire arrives with the entire place blackening out. Cordelia has a fear of dark places so she’s going crazy. G4 are led on a wild goose chase due to Arsene’s illusion Toys. In the end, the thieves got away due to another blooper from Cordelia after she trips and destroys Saku’s computer that would’ve bring them to the culprit’s hideout. Milky Holmes are thrown into jail and it’s mind blowing that they’re relishing jail food! Haven’t eaten this much since they’ve lost their privileges, eh? Henriette comes by to bail them out since the academy’s reputation is at stake if they’re left here for eternity. Back in their attic, Nero continues to blame Hercule so she runs away. Thinking she must’ve felt responsible, they rush back to the museum to see her doing those Twister moves. They apologize and made up but it seems the gentlemen thieves are also here to return the statue (because it was fake in the first place). They start facing each other and in a twist of fate, Cordelia and Twenty got trapped in a coffin together. Oh the horror! She’s going to die from the grossness before the darkness could even get to her. Everyone cooperates to get them out but to no avail. Till Cordelia yells that something weird is touching her did Hercule suddenly lifts the top lid, throws it away so much so it landed and crush a parked car outside! Thankfully, it was just some strange mask was touching her. Why is Twenty wearing it?! Anyway the baddies retreat while the girls think that for that moment, their Toys returned. What does this mean? It means they go back and try that ridiculous Twister game again. Give it up already! Too dumb to even realize that it’s fake! Besides, shouldn’t they be helping G4 clean up the museum mess?

Episode 4
But God is fair because Kokoro gets a taste of her own medicine as she is being beaten up and made to do those embarrassing Twister moves. They finally found out the truth, huh? But no time for that as they are tasked to look for a girl, Irene Doala who went missing in Yokohama Forest that is close to the academy. Milky Holmes want to help out too but was tied up. Who knows the nuisance they will bring. Unfortunately I don’t know why the G4 tied them up with ropes that are edible. It took those hungry gluttons no time to chew everything up. They try to summon their Toys but all they summoned was just a giant black ferocious bear. It slammed Sherlock away. She finds herself following a group of lemmings leaping off the cliff to their doom. Is she going to follow? I don’t know what to say. She did. I don’t know how this happened too because she started flying somewhere when a speck of water got into her eye as she finds herself in a cave with someone familiar. G4 continues their search but Kokoro fell into a hole in the ground and ends up in the same cave with Sherlock and Irene. Now, Irene isn’t a damsel in distress. In fact, she is much more reliable and smarter than her rescuers. However after seeing cute Kokoro, she develops some kind of stupid imouto-chan fetish over her. Darkness falls so the other Milky Holmes return but follow a banana trail that leads them to being locked up by Henriette and co. They fell for the oldest trick in the book. But no matter, they seem to be enjoying their bananas. Sherlock and Kokoro learn that Irene’s dad’s company is going bankrupt soon so she wanted to save him by looking for some buried treasure based on some Warring States legend. She found it in this cave but it’s useless if she doesn’t get out and the deadline is tomorrow. The next day, they got out of the cave and start their trek home through the forest. How come it feels like Irene was the one saving and guiding them through? They take a break and fight over the last ration that Irene has: A banana. Then they come into that black bear again. Sherlock is going to protect the duo but gets owned instead. Irene temporarily throws a banana at it to buy them some time (and they thought she had no more bananas left). Then Sherlock suggests some resonating moves but they got owned again by the bear. All that’s left is to run away and I’m not sure why the heck a self destruct button is in the forest so they’re actually saved when the bear steps on it. I don’t know what it unlocked. Heck, I don’t even understand all this nonsense. Soon the other G4 girls come in their helicopter to rescue them. With the company saved, Irene bids farewell to G4, she knocks Kokoro unconscious and kidnaps her! I’m amazed that the rest didn’t notice about this. Have they gotten use to her absence? And for Sherlock, she is disheartened that her gang gave up searching for her and instead feast on the bananas till they’re bloated. Meanie!

Episode 5
While having their poor picnic of grilled mushrooms in the park, Hercule tries to rescue Kamaboko from being run over by a truck but they were saved by a pair of flashy girls, Mary and Kate (I hope they have got nothing to do with the Olsen twins). Was it necessary to even explode the truck? However it seems that the pair have ulterior motives as they plan to capture Kamaboko. Back in the attic, Milky Holmes are admiring the great detectives the pair may be while Kamaboko is in risk of being kidnapped by the said pair. While chasing it, they bump into Twenty who is annoyingly dating a pillow cover version of himself! F*cking gross! Then they accidentally meet Milky Holmes and have to play along as some sort of great detectives they admire. The lolis are too dumb to even sense that they’re here to kidnap Kamaboko but thankfully it’s their fluke that ‘foils’ Kate and Mary’s plans. They continue their chase over the kitten and successfully capture it when the lolis were engrossed in their mushroom grilling. Milky Holmes go in search for Kamaboko and Henriette approves of it since it will put to use their detective searching skills. They go around asking the people and stumble upon G3. Who? It’s G4 less Kokoro for now. Yeah, she’s really being kidnapped by a certain genius kid. Meanwhile Mary and Kate are going to have their revenge on Kamaboko and SPCA would’ve taken action for their animal abuse if not for the gentlemen thieves busting in. They are here to bring justice to them for trespassing through Arsene’s territory (the academy grounds) that night. Then they see the walls filled with pictures of Kamaboko. Actually, it is their ex-lover who resembles very much like Kamaboko. Yeah, they’ve already drawn graffiti on its face. So as they fight, it’s the case of revenge for being dumped. They were promised that there will be no feelings in which of the duo he’d choose but dumped them. Maybe it’s because they’re messed up? The funny part was how Twenty’s bolster took a hit and he was inconsolable that his beautiful best buddy sacrificed himself for him. Didn’t he throw the bolster instead? Kamaboko is reunited with Milky Holmes as they head towards where the battle is taking place. Twenty and Stone River got hypnotized into Mary and Kate’s ecstasy Toys while Rat escapes upon his comrade’s advice. Mary and Kate shift their attention to Kamaboko but Rat decides to throw a bomb at them. Kamaboko deflects it and sends the gentlemen thieves flying into the sky. Mary and Kate felt grateful that it saved them from a darkness of revenge from their hearts and brought them back to the light. Milky Holmes see them off in a ship.

Episode 6
Princess Claris of Marlo kingdom is upset that she has to get married to Prince Pero of Lipa kingdom. Anyway I don’t know how Kokoro returned to G4 but she’s complaining that they need to babysit her. Unfortunately too much blabbing means Claris could sneak out without any detection. It’s total freedom and a normal life she seeks. Meanwhile Milky Holmes yearn for a dehumidifier since their place is getting all damp in this rainy condition. They all have this great idea of gathering elsewhere instead of cooping up here. Sherlock bumps into Henriette (her face literally stuck between her cleavage!). Henriette reminds them about finding a way to retrieve their Toys but after seeing the determination in her eyes, she believes her. In the streets, they see on the screen Claris (she is here to be wedded with Pero in Yokohama) and thought it was Sherlock. Yeah, they look very alike. After dispelling it, they notice Sherlock is missing. Sherlock bumps into the real Claris in the alley. Claris wants Sherlock to be her substitute just for a day (she knows of Sherlock due to the badmouthing of a certain cop). Of course she wasn’t going to accept it but the word of ‘great detective’ seems to defeat all other rational. Yup, take the job. As a reward, Sherlock wants a dehumidifier. Uhn… They trade clothes and really look like a splitting image of the other. Milky Holmes find Sherlock (Claris) and drags her away while Claris’ grandma Marple is reprimanding them for their failed watch when Claris (Sherlock) suddenly returns. She is being reminded about the importance of their marriage since the fate of Marlo depends on it (if Lipa finances them, there’s nothing else to be said, eh?). And why the heck is Marple doing those weird squats while explaining this to her? Then Pero comes in. Hmm… Looks like the handsome macho gentlemen hunk. But wait, he wants her to say “meow” at the end of her sentences? Could he be?

Meanwhile the real Claris is really happy to be living a normal life with the rest so much so it brings tears to her eyes. Wow. Never experienced simple happiness before, eh? As for Sherlock, it turns out that Pero is some sort of a masochist pervert. Doesn’t Sherlock hate him? Heck, she’s having fun!!! Of course with both look-a-likes switching places, Sherlock can’t even sleep even if her bed is big and wide or her meals sumptuous. Claris is getting used to it no matter how much it sucks and loving it. She thinks that she can run away and dump all the responsibilities on Sherlock but the latter remains confident she will return. Henriette knows Claris’ disguise and talks to her, asking if this is alright. She mentions about her dream of living a normal life but now she has to marry a guy she doesn’t even love. Henriette replies she can’t obtain her dreams by running away unlike Sherlock who is trying her best to become a great detective. This opens Claris’ eyes so she decides to reveal her true identity to the other Milky Holmes girls. They don’t believe her! Till she tells the real value of pi! Oh sh*t! Is that all it takes? They’re going to storm the wedding hall but G4 stands in their way. As usual, they don’t believe she’s the real Claris till she blurts out pi’s value. Unbelievable! Yeah, probably it tells us Sherlock and co has always been dumb girls. The wedding is going to end as Sherlock starts panicking that Claris hasn’t returned yet. Plus, it’s kissing time. Oh, the horrible lips! Luckily the rest barge in in time and stop the ceremony. Claris reveals her true self and says she cannot marry Pero. Plus, she will not run away and will achieve peace within both kingdoms with her own hands. The crowd applause as Pero admits that he did all those masochist perverted stuff to get her to hate him. That’s because he has somebody else he loves: Marple. Argh! He proposes to Marple and the ugly lips locked. Eww… The ceremony continues with their holy union as Milky Holmes got the dehumidifier as their prized treasure. And why the heck is Sherlock playing S&M with herself?! Finding it nice? Oh dear. I hope she won’t be addicted to it. Hey, everyone come join in! Not!

Episode 7
Phantom Thief Empire are at Phantom Thief Killer Cape. It is believed a multimillionaire named Baskerville hid his lifetime collection of artworks here. Many have tried to infiltrate but none was ever successful. Looks like their plan will need some modification since Milky Holmes are here for vacation (they have to trek here since they have no money for a bus fare. Poor things) and also heard about that cape thingy which they believe will bring their Toys back (they heard it from a certain stripper teacher’s slip of tongue). Hey, G4 are here too. Henriette plays along with the girls while the guys hide and plan their move. Milky Holmes get hungry and try to get some seafood but they’re so useless and beyond help that even their crab got stolen by the seagull, got entangled by the seaweeds or get hit by Tsugiko’s bat instead of the watermelon (now she knows why there is a watermelon ‘growing’ on the beach, eh?). Since it started to rain, the ladies take refuge in a cave. As they trek deeper, there are suspicious signs pointing to the treasure. Of course, they activated a trap and cause them to be separated. Kokoro, Tsugiko, Hirano, Cordelia and Hercule falling to the bottom of the pit and the rest carrying on. Henriette’s group enter into an area that resembles a luxurious mansion. Nero triggers another trap (picking up a coin from the ground) and causes Henriette to be separated as she is switched into a secret room. The rest read on a library of books for clues of the treasure while Kokoro’s group strip themselves naked to make a rope long enough to climb themselves out. Why is Cordelia so enthusiastic about stripping? This leads them to a hotspring area but they are being attacked by a giant squid. Oh no. Tentacles. However Cordelia becomes some made monster because she sees it as a meal… Henriette finds herself in a room with a bikini mannequin while Saku also joins her when she activates a trap that sends her falling into that room. Sherlock and Nero are in a room with a safe. Nero tries using her Toys to open it but to no avail. However it opens probably it’s an old safe. They find a collection of idol figurines in it. Then cold water starts filling the room. Nero again tries to use her Toys to communicate with the safe. Though the water stopped, now hot water comes pouring in and they’re washed away to another room. Everyone is reunited in the hotspring area and having a good squid meal while enjoying their soaking moments. Henriette realizes how it has become ridiculous to even steal from this Phantom Thief Killer now. As for the gentlemen thieves, they’re adrift at sea with no food for 3 straight days.

Episode 8
Milky Holmes fall ill. Seems it was another black-hearted prank of Kokoro making them eat ice cream till they brain freeze, meditating under a waterfall and freeze themselves in the freezer. Yeah, it’s amazing they’re still this gullible. I know they’re desperate to get their Toys returned but to ask Kokoro for help? Of all people? She’s really enjoying and laughing her heart out. Bad girl. Even her G4 mates think so. Even Henriette takes pity on them and decides to nurse them back to health. The next day, Milky Holmes are good as healthy but this time Henriette collapses and has caught their illness. Now it’s their turn to take care of her. The gentlemen thieves want to have the honour of ‘cleaning her sweat off her naked body’ but the girls insist that the guys should stay out of this. They decide to change her clothes and the only one they could find in her closet is… Oh dear! It’s her sexy phantom thief suit! Oh no! Will her identity be blown? G4 are paying a visit at the academy (I guess Kokoro still wants to see the Milky Holmes suffer by bringing some iced peach cans) when they heard Milky Holmes yelling “Arsene”! They barge in and are surprised to see Arsene lying in the bed but being told by Milky Holmes she is Henriette. The gentlemen thieves are worried that this pinch is going to get worse and have to do something. But don’t worry. They don’t even have to lift a single finger. Why? How do the girls dismiss that Arsene is Henriette? Sherlock’s answer: She loves to cosplay! Oh sh*t! Everyone buys it! And for that moment, the guys thought she’d be a goner but remember, they’re retards. Big time. Anyway they change Henriette into her pyjamas as they try to nurse her by concocting medicine based on fairytales. Are they even attainable? I’m not sure the kind of medicine Sherlock mixed (it must be dangerous since it was mosaic out) and poured into Henriette’s mouth. She starts glowing and everyone becomes absorbed into some sort of twisted fairytale. Some Momotarou legend Sherlock is, trying to retrieve some peach at Arsene Island but meets the gentlemen thieves as obstacles. It gets more twisted when they fight Arsene using her boobs as missiles but their combined Toys allows them to defeat her. Henriette is fed by Sherlock a delicious peach. She wakes up and sees the other girls knocked out on the floor. She notes that Milky Holmes’ Toys returned to them briefly albeit it was only in the middle of her illusion Toys. Twenty’s crap words: “The world is beautiful. But I am even more beautiful”. Henriette thanks them for nursing her as Milky Holmes wonder what her Toys power is. Then they see Kokoro receiving her much deserved divine retribution as she is stuck in the giant ice and getting sick. Oh yeah. God is fair.

Episode 9
While Milky Holmes are happily pigging out with their poor meal, they are joined by another student, Sonia and even Nezu. Seems it is to celebrate the 1 year anniversary Sonia met her senpai Sherlock. Hercule finds an Ouija Board and their curiosity has them asking it if their Toys will return. Nezu pans them for fixing the outcome. To prove it, he tells them to ask which among them is the stupidest! They’re really fighting to pinpoint the answer! They then change the question to who is the meanest. Yeah, how come it quickly spells Nezu’s name? Later Nezu walks Sonia back to her dorm but shortly, he is being attacked. Next day, G4 is conducting some boring road safety class (everyone except Sherlock) and after the class, Kokoro finds a trail which leads her to see Nezu’s dead body in a room! As everyone is shocked over his death, Henriette shows them a picture which might implicate Milky Holmes as the perpetrator because Nezu’s wrote the initials of “M.H.” in blood before his death. They insist they are innocent but she wants them to prove it by tomorrow or she’ll hand them over to the police. Milky Holmes decide to request for their ancestor’s help via Ouija Board. It seems to work as the baldy (Hercules), the busty boobs (Cordelia) and fatty (Nero) possess their counterparts. Calling Henriette and Kokoro to the scene, they use their great detective deduction skills to solve the mystery of the initials. Erm… How come the theories sound so stupid?! No wonder their descendants share it! They deduct the culprit based on the animal they could draw on it? Monkey? Hamster? WTF?! Then a bronze statue of Sherlock Holmes comes crashing in as the spirit of the great detective possesses Sherlock. He’s late because he possessed the wrong statue. Oh no. Please not another idiot. Thankfully, Sherlock’s deduction is top class this time, deducting that the victim may not know the murderer’s name so he tried to convey what he remembered about the murderer, in this case via some numerals.

So “M.H.” by reading it in a different direction is “I-3”, which is the dorm block number. And the culprit is no other than Sonia who launches an attack on everyone. Sherlock Holmes’ spirit whisks Henriette away from harm and he whispers in her ear that he knows she’s the phantom thief Arsene. He starts chasing her but I don’t understand the necessity to use their telekinesis powers to uproot buildings and throw it to each other. Wow! I didn’t know Sherlock Holmes has such terror telekinesis! Besides, why does he need to avoid them if he’s just a spirit? In the end, he saves Sonia from falling off the roof. Nezu is seen alive and he doesn’t need to play dead anymore. The great ancestors take their leave and leave them a huge message on the ground, saying that they will get their Toys back after a great trial. Later Henriette sees Sonia and knows that she schemed all this so that Milky Holmes would earn back the respect they once lost. Plus, the message was written by her and not the victim and this means Milky Holmes will move to solve the case whether they want to or not since they’re being doubted. Due to the severity of the case, she has Sonia expelled but recommends her to start over again at Poirot Detective Academy because she feels she should not waste her Toys but become a great detective instead and not a phantom thief. Milky Holmes pray to Nezu’s altar and use the Ouija Board to talk to him but he barges in proclaiming he isn’t dead. They think he’ a ghost coming down to visit them! Something still bugs me. If Henriette didn’t realize it was Sonia’s plan till the end, does this mean Nezu secretly cooperated with Sonia for this?

Episode 10
Milky Holmes are excited over the prospect of their returned Toys. Henriette is expecting high hopes from them with the upcoming exam but they would like to go gather first. Hercule tries to persuade them to study but eventually gives in to their persistence to have fun. Yeah, they wasted a whole week gathering and having fun instead of studying. The gentlemen thieves are pondering the possibility of them getting their Toys back (on an unrelated note, notice a shirt being hang out to dry with the words “I Love Boku” – no prize to guess whose shirt this belongs to). The trio reminiscence the time they first met. Let’s say they aren’t the best of friends. Heck, they’re rivals. As they fight over each other while stealing jewellery, Arsene’s appearance and her display of her illusion Toys has them offering their services to her. Seeing that they are this weak to give in to their desires, she wants them to commit themselves to become phantom thieves with beauty and intelligence. Thus in their journey to ‘redeem’ back their pride, they swore loyalty to Arsene and to her cause. Of course, they start arguing themselves over their petty differences. And Milky Holmes are the one to say how lame it is after watching from afar their Toys going berserk. On the day of the exam, Milky Holmes undergo very weird tests that include a game show quiz, moving an elephant, staring into Twenty’s erected nipples and beautiful body (I can’t believe Cordelia drooled over it!) and some sort of bowling with them as the pins. In short, they failed them all. Henriette isn’t pleased. While Milky Holmes lament about their failures and the non-return of their Toys, they hear a report that Arsene challenges them to a trial that will decide whether they get expelled or not. Sherlock realizes that this is the trial that should have their Toys return and the ones they have taken are just tests (I guess there’s a difference in that). With high spirits, they head to the museum (got caught in G4’s trap again).

Inside, Milky Holmes face off with the gentlemen thieves but the trio are so focused in their petty feud, they couldn’t be bothered with Milky Holmes’ arrival. Why is Sherlock so insistent on announcing that they have arrived? She’s even concerned that they shouldn’t fight among themselves because it would be just like them. So when they do realize it’s those useless lolis, they do some tetrahedron formation. I don’t know the significance of this but how will Milky Holmes get out of this? They desperately try to summon their Toys but again to no avail. Then a blackout occurs. You can count Cordelia out. Then Sherlock decides to use a bomb they used during the test (where the heck did she hide that?). The guys escape while the bomb explodes, making a gaping hole in the building. I’m surprised Milky Holmes are still in one piece. This time, Kokoro’s upset is real. With the way they messed things out, she yells at them to get out of their crime scene. The guys return to Arsene while continuing to blame each other for their pettiness, it seems Arsene is in no mood for it. She is so mad that when she hits the wall, the entire top of the tower twist and bend worse than being bombarded by WWII bombers. Oh sh*t! Milky Holmes trudge back in the rain to their dorm but suddenly their room catches fire. Then they see Henriette. Looks like she has had enough. Her face is visibly upset. Very. She throws down their expulsion papers. Oh dear.

Episode 11
As Sherlock leaves, she bumps into a very displeased (enough to even scare me) Henriette. She apologizes for everything and thus Milky Holmes is disbanded as they leave the academy in shame, each going their own ways. The rest didn’t like her idea of bowing and saying goodbye and thanks to the academy. Meanwhile Henriette takes out her frustration by smashing all the awards, trophies and certificates of Milky Holmes in her room. She thinks everything turned out like this because she wasn’t serious enough. Sherlock continues to work in a ramen stall but she is so clumsy and useless (including pissing off her customers with her klutz), it makes you wonder why the owner didn’t fire her. Her buddies aren’t faring any better. Selling flowers? Selling magazines? Ouija Board prediction? Better avoid them. G4 pays a visit at Sherlock’s workplace and tells her about Phantom Thief Empire’s rampaging robberies. They’re on a hot streak. Sherlock goes to gather her other pals and then they see another news with Arsene announcing that she plans to make Yokohama a phantom thief haven by crushing the academy. Henriette is seen hanging precariously over the rapid river on a bridge. She invites those with a sense of justice to come rescue her. With every 2 hours, a string will be snapped and she will be closer to her doom. After the transmission, we see it’s actually Twenty impersonating as Arsene and the real deal is hanging over the bridge. I hate to admit it, but who is more qualified to play a beauty like her? Yeah, this is going to be a do-or-die bait. Milky Holmes aren’t confident of going to her rescue seeing that they are normal (and useless) girls now and hopes G4 will pull through. Speaking of which, they are first to arrive but are easily taken out and captured by the gentlemen thieves. Milky Holmes resume their jobs but Sherlock tries to convince everyone to go save Henriette. She nails it in when she gets all teary and says that they’ve got their priorities wrong if they put becoming great detectives first and saving others second. Plus, it isn’t about getting revenge on the person who expelled them and their failures are because they gave up halfway, gave up on themselves. This opens their eyes as they reconcile and don their detective suits to go to Henriette’s rescue. Can they make it in time?

Irene’s limo was passing by so she gives them a lift. Then they get a delivery from Sonia. It seems to be a ring infused with a single dose of her Toys’ power. Sherlock should be able to use it since it is from her same bloodline. And yeah, why did Claris send royal plates over? The gentlemen thieves are bored since they’ve taken out just about everyone. Then when Milky Holmes come by, they aren’t alerted, thinking they’re still the useless lolis. However to their surprise, they hit their raw nerve when they call them coward for holding hostages (Stone River), ugly (Twenty – oh, that’s got to hurt) and… Rabbit (Rat)? Cordelia, Nero and Hercule hold off the trio while Sherlock rushes to save Henriette. How can a bunch of lolis hold down full grown men? It’s called determination. When Sherlock reaches out her hand for Henriette, it’s part of her plan to detonate the last rope. Sherlock dives down to save her. Sonia’s ring temporarily gives Sherlock her Toys power but it is too overwhelming as the ring breaks. Falling again? She grabs on tightly to Henriette and probably deep down in her heart she wanted to save her so much that she got her Toys back! Then the other Milky Holmes also feel that they are getting their Toys back and put them to good use. For once, the gentlemen thieves get serious but they are no match and get a serious trashing! As Sherlock pulls Henriette up, the latter pushes her away and unleashes a smoke screen. She transforms into Arsene and relishes the chance she has been waiting for all this time: To fight and defeat the real and powered up Sherlock.

Episode 12
The other gentlemen thieves are pounded to a pulp as the other Milky Holmes join Sherlock in a Toys power battle with Arsene. Seems she too has powered up as the entire Yokohama citizens watch the decisive battle in baited breath. Milky Holmes combine their Toys to attack Arsene but each try makes her crave for more. She’s really enjoying the moment of fighting those detectives at their top form. The fight continues to a different dimension as Arsene unleashes clones of herself. In the climax of the face-off between Arsene’s giant fireball and Sherlock’s pink little energy projection, suddenly Sherlock got too close to Arsene and has her face stuck in her boobs. She is reminded of the bounciness and softness and is happy that Henriette is alright. However surprised Arsene denies it. Sherlock’s pals didn’t believe at first but taking up her advice to touch her boobs, they instantly believe it’s Henriette! I guess that’s her trademark. No matter how much Arsene denies, the retards firmly believe she is their student council president. Even if her mask falls off. Arsene summons a meteor to send the entire place crashing down to the academy grounds. Milky Holmes look very funny with their heads sticking out from the ground like grown vegetables. Arsene is in for another surprise when Milky Holmes identify her as the phantom thief instead. Amidst the blabbing confusing, Arsene deduces that the impact and shock must have made them lose their memories. Arsene decides to withdraw for now and give Henriette back to them but will not lose the next time. The schoolmates rush to Milky Holmes’ side and help out their revived heroes. Arsene and her men are looking forward to more battles with them.

Next day, Milk Holmes are given a certificate of appreciation, much to Kokoro’s reluctance. Everyone is cheering on for them. How does it feel to be back in the spotlight? Kokoro isn’t happy that they let Arsene get away but Henriette mentions that there will be another chance for that. In the packed hall, Sherlock is going to treat everyone with a demonstration of their returned Toys. A rock is sent crashing onto her. It crashes onto her! Wait a minute… What the?! Don’t tell me?! Oh no! Seems like not only the impact made them lose their memories, but their Toys as well! See how everybody’s face turn into despair and disappointment. Except for Kokoro and the gentlemen thieves who are happy they’ve returned to their retarded ways. Even Henriette is lost for words and quickly ends the ceremony. So, back to the dull life for Milky Holmes as they trek back to their room expecting to be expelled. However they get a present surprise it is back to normal and cleaned up. All thanks to Henriette. As mentioned, though they have lost their Toys, you can deny the fact that they saved Yokohama. That means, their expulsion will be… postponed till spring. Dang. And they thought it’ll be cancelled for good. But the quartet are happy that they’re together and since they have each other, nothing is impossible. Oh well Henriette. Looks like it’s going to be another tiring season if this keeps this up. Lastly a new transfer student barges in and is excited of meeting them. She is Mori Arty and knows them all. The quartet finds her cute and takes a liking for her. For those who don’t know, the character named Professor Moriarty is Sherlock Holmes’ greatest arch enemy in the stories. Ironic, eh?

Bungling detectives…
I have to admit that everything has been a fun ride from the start till the finish. There were laugh out moments and this is definitely one of the good comedy series that I’ve seen in recent times. You could say that this show is on par with Shinryaku! Ika Musume and Panty And Stocking With Garterbelt that I too enjoyed. It’s hard for me to totally recommend this series for the family to watch. I know, cute little girls running around may seem harmless but the only reason why I’m stopping my suggestion at that is perhaps of Arsene/Henriette’s over-sized and bouncy boobs. Man, do they even exist? How does she keep it all tightly wrap under that school dress? In a little way, you can call that fanservice. Oh, another factor why this isn’t for kids: Twenty. That guy says it all. Don’t want your kids to have a bad influence from this stripper, eh? The flow of the story is at a good pace as we mainly see how Milky Holmes try to regain their lost Toys by going through lots of tough trial and tribulations. Usually with hilarious and disastrous results. Each time you can’t help feel that glimmer of hope that their Toys will return for the moment but in the end, it all turns back to square one. Even if their Toys temporarily return, was it really fluke? When someone they love is in great danger, could it only be then that their Toys will return? The mystery and reason of their Toys’ disappearance is never explained nor given priority that it will be revealed somehow and though this feels like it needs some investigation but I don’t think that case will be solved any time given the way Milky Holmes are right not.

Milky Holmes as fallen detectives are a bunch of fun loving lolis. It’s hard to hate them since their fall from grace not only because they’re cute but the fact that they never gave up. Other than that, it’s hard to wonder if they’re the genius detectives they once were. I mean, their ‘stupidity’ and retardness is well, genuine from then. From being selfish spoilt brats to happy go lucky simpletons (all they worried at first is food and are easily swayed by it) to annoying useless dumb asses that obstruct others, even if you throw the clues and answers right in front of their faces, they’ll never be able to guess it. So much so I concluded that the only reason why they don’t really lose out is because they’re the heroines. Nothing else. Sheesh. Even the baddies are much more competent than them a hundred times even if one them really has a personality problem. Makes you wonder that they just inherited the name from their great ancestors. At the rate they’re going, they are going to sully and tarnish it. They’d even turn over in their graves. How can a famous detective academy even house such disgraceful retards? How could this even be possible? But you have to give it them and especially Sherlock for their sunny disposition as she is the one that glues the rest together. Hercule is too shy, Nero is too brute and tomboyish while Cordelia is, well, too delusional when she becomes afraid. Say, if Cordelia’s Toys is to see and hear things that others could not, how come she couldn’t sense that Henriette is Arsene then? Oh yeah, retard…

Aside from those ‘idiots’, Kokoro should have fittingly been part of the group if not for her utmost detest for the detectives. She thinks she is hell of a smart each time proudly stating her IQ level, which by the way increases 10 times fold from the 130 level to 130 billion by the time the series ended. Did she magnify that on purpose? Or does she have memory problems in keeping track of her own IQ? Not very smart, eh? Besides, I have no qualms if she even reaches 130 trillion. Yeah, I admit you’re smart. In monkey land whereby the average IQ is 130 quadrillion (that’s 15 zeros, baby!). And she’s a graduate from Harvard? Yeah, my dog also graduated from there with First Class Honours in Business Administration. It’s sad she ended up as the leader of G4 and even her partners are more ‘human’ than her. Even if Saku’s face is always monotonous like her voice, at least she’s more considerate than Kokoro. The only thing that scares Kokoro downright is the mentioning of Irene’s name. Oh yeah. She’s developed some sort of trauma in the end. After all, she personally knows how it feels to be kidnapped and treated like a doll. Hey, how the heck did she escaped from Irene’s grasp in the final episode? Besides it’s not like with Kokoro around, G4 gets the job done anyway. Detectives or police, what’s the difference if they’re retards? No wonder phantom thieves like Arsene can’t be caught.

Arsene/Henriette is full of mysteries and you can’t understand what is going on in her mind. It’s understandable that she wants to beat Milky Holmes at their top form but to go as far as to nurture them and even help them under the disguise as school staffs along with her men, how many baddies in other series do you know are this considerate? Put it this way. If you have put in lots of effort in growing and planting a fruit, when it ripens, it is going to taste a lot more delicious when you pluck it, right? Arsene has a short taste of that and looks like the fruit needs more tending if she’s going to enjoy the ultimate reap. One of the most disgusting and annoying character is Twenty. You have to agree with me on this. Each time, he never fails to deluge himself the super beauty he is (only second to Arsene, that is). He gets his thrills by not only stripping but molesting his own nipples!!! Yikes! Each time he is stimulated, you can grossly see how erected his nipples become! The more aroused he is, the longer his nipples! Oh sh*t!!! During such scenes, it makes me want to laugh and also flinch at the same time. So uncouth, so sickening but yet so funny. Well, it serves as a good lesson that I will NEVER do such a thing. Ever. On another thought, I think the gentlemen thieves will also be retards if they aren’t under the guidance of Arsene. So looks like Arsene is the only and real genius out of all the characters in here. Yeah, the world is filled with so many stupid people. So I guess even if Clark Kent admits himself as Superman here, you could say his secretly is definitely safe. Heck, Milky Holmes couldn’t identify Nijuuri as Twenty when he starts stripping and thought the latter just reminded them of the former. What more can I say? As for the other minor characters, they are quirky enough to have a slightly lasting impression even if they are just cameos for that particular episode. Like Claris’ desire to be free and experience the normal life, Pero’s love for Marple, Irene’s little sister fetish and the amusing poses of Kate and Mary. In a way, these people played a role in helping Milky Holmes to regain their lost Toys.

The opening theme is Sekai Wa Hitotsu! Janaii!! by the seiyuus of Milky Holmes and sounds like your typical genki and cheerful upbeat theme for the detective quartet. However the ending theme is much opposite and it’s like dedicated to the phantom thief of Arsene and her men. Entitled Honnou No Doubt by Faylan, this dark rock piece definitely suits her nature. Each of the episode title is named and based after a famous detective novel. If you look closely, when title is first displayed on the screen, it is the real original title and after the magnifying glass goes across them, the title changes to the modified version that will be the adventure of Milky Holmes in that episode. On a trivial note, the sponsor screen has the characters drawn in chibi form so they really look cute and funny. Of course the end card with different illustrations are also a little eye candy just like the mid-intermission with the characters in poses or places (okay, some of them felt like for fanservice). As for the next episode preview, we have the characters ranting about but it often ends with that character revealing herself/himself as the culprit even if she/he isn’t. Who? What? When? Why? Everybody is a retard, guilty as charged!

I might not get any interest of reading or watching detective novels and movies, but if there is going to be another season of Milky Holmes, you bet that I’ll be around to catch them in their silly antics. I know it’s bad of me to say this but I hope they keep failing their test to find back their Toys so that I could enjoy some laughs when they screw up. Bad me. I do sound like Kokoro enjoying seeing those lolis suffer and not even knowing it or what hit them till it’s too late. Forgive me if I called them retards too many times but it’s true. At least I know who NOT to call when a crime needs solving. Never let lolis do a man’s job. No wonder crime is flourishing. And I’m the guilty culprit for encouraging that. Doesn’t that make us partners in crime?

I couldn’t believe that there is another OVA for the Kodomo No Jikan series. And I thought after the second season that came in the form of OVA, there won’t be another round of horny loli to go about. This is what I found out. I think. Besides the TV series and the Nigakki OVA, there are a total of 3 OVAs. The first one being the one shown before the TV series started (the little girls trying to buy Aoki a present), the second one focusing on the relationship between Kuro and Shirai-sensei and the recent one released back in January 2011, which is this blog, is the third one. Wow, that’s a long time if you consider this OVA spanning 3 over years for just 3 episodes.

In this third OVA instalment, Aoki’s 3 little students, Rin, Kuro and Mimi follow him back to his seaside hometown. His colleague Houin also tags along in hopes to appeal to his parents as his bride. Looks like she hasn’t given up yet. Aoki is tackled by his younger sister Chika. Rin and Houin start thinking that she will be their future sister-in-law. Counting your chickens, eh? Chika proceeds to greet the kids but doesn’t seem too fond with Houin because of her bigger boobs. In the car ride, Kuro hears that Chika is popular with the girls during her school days and tries to get some tips from her but was ignored (if you watched the series, you’ll know Kuro is a lesbian and has a crush on Rin but that love is one-sided). Rin and Houin blush when they hear how Chika was telling Aoki that their mom got excited when she thought he was bringing home a bride.

Upon reaching the house, the gang meets Aoki’s mom. She welcomes them until she mistaken Houin’s flabby belly for being pregnant and repetitively slaps Aoki! How can my son do such a thing?! Why is Rin trying to put a pillow up her stomach to be pregnant?! As the little ones put on their swimsuit, Mimi feigns she has her period coming and thus forgot to bring her swimsuit. That’s when Chika comes in and fondles-cum-tests Mimi’s boobs. She proceeds to give Mimi her old swimsuit and teaches her how to use a tampon. I’m not sure if Mimi’s moaning is fear or sensation. As they play at the beach, Rin bluffs Aoki that she has been stung by a jellyfish on the thigh and wants him to suck the poison out. He was really going to do so when Kuro came by to note that the permanent marker is wearing off. Pissed off Rin buries Kuro in the sand. Yeah, she’s making Mimi at least building her ‘bigger boobs’. Rin gets an SMS from Reiji so Aoki teases her that he must be free. This upsets Rin as she tells him off that Reiji only has feelings for her mom. But what Aoki meant was he was free to watch porn. That’s a joke of course. Rin continues that when her mom was still alive, the 3 of them would go to the beach and had lots of fun.

That night back home, Aoki rubs lotion on Kuro’s back as she is in pain from sunburn. Chika talks to Houin about Aoki and since the busty teacher’s flustering is so obvious, Chika decides to tease her more and invites her to drink. As Aoki falls asleep, Rin comes in and sleeps next to him naked! Then Aoki starts cuddling Rin like as though she is a bolster! When Aoki awakens, he finds Houin and Chika flanking and sleeping beside him. They reek of alcohol too. Looks like Rin couldn’t take the heat and backed out earlier. She thinks it is impossible for it to ‘fit’ in. Aoki goes to sleep somewhere else as Houin unconsciously goes on top of Chika and starts kissing her! Yeow! That passionate tongue kissing! Because of that, the next morning Chika starts to fear Houin though the latter doesn’t have any recollections of last night’s hot passion. She’s obviously acting real strange.

That evening, the little girls make preparations for the Bon festival. Aoki comes back from an errand with Houin and notices Rin looking gloomy though she scoffs it off as nothing. Night comes as Kuro tries to play a sparkler prank on Aoki but it backfires. Chika becomes scared when Houin comes in to bath with her. Crazy city girl, she thinks… Rin becomes more depressed when her sparkler dims. Later Aoki goes to talk to her. She mentions something about she thought she could meet her mom again. Aoki notes how he thought he wanted her to quickly grow up so as to change all those sad feelings to memories. But he rather let her stay as a kid around him and spend her time as one. Aoki allows Rin to hug him, delighting her very much. The next morning, Aoki and co prepare to leave. Aoki teases Kuro who is really tanned and nicknames her so (her name means black) so Kuro gives that virgin a kick in the crotch. After all those kicking, he should’ve seen this coming. Before Rin leaves, she puts a photo that she took of themselves next to Aoki’s photo during his younger days.

Summer Holiday and Lolis…
Well, this OVA doesn’t feel like much. Just a little bit more on Aoki and Rin but nothing really concrete that will take their relationship to the next level. Oh, who am I kidding? It’s not like Aoki is a lolicon because he is a good person and teacher to begin with. Surprisingly this OVA isn’t as horny as the TV serious or previous OVAs. The only fanservice bit you’ll ever get to see is that short naked scene when Houin enters the bath to join Chika. This OVA was rather more of a drama and a smatter of some funny parts here and there. Otherwise if this is the real ‘final’ episode of the Kodomo No Jikan series, then what more can I say?

I guess it’s rather okay since it has been a long time since I watched this series and even if it doesn’t amount to anything much, missing a few other characters like Reiji and Shirai. Kuro and Mimi were just playing supporting roles and not much development for them. Chika was sure funny herself because she got more than she bargained for in the end. She thought she could tease Houin and have fun doing so but it turned out that she became very conscious of her. So what about Houin’s chances on Aoki? Maybe that will be another story.

So again, this series is about the childhood times of a person. If that kid has a traumatic childhood, then there is a big chance he/she will be unstable and most likely endanger not only everyone else but himself/herself as well. So it’s best that every child enjoys their childhood as we know, we all only have one. I don’t know if I’m wasting my youth being an otaku. You can call me a kid still or a big buffalo. Anyhow you look at it, I’m quite happy the way things are.

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