Assemble Insert

Oh look. Here is a very strange retro anime I accidentally stumbled upon. Not sure what to make of Assemble Insert because this 1989 anime is about an idol that fights crime. Well, sort of. When bad guys terrorizes the streets of Tokyo and your ordinary police can do no jack sh*t about them, how do you tackle this problem? You send in a young idol singer with a catchy voice and unbelievable superhuman strength! Oh wow. That’s the synopsis of this show? Okay. Try not to put too much hope in it…

Episode 1
Well, a group of bad mecha boys from an evil organization known as Demon Seed are making a fool out of the cops. I mean, who’s gonna stop them, right? Hattori is the chief of a specially formed police division to tackle Demon Seed. But what does his underlings do? Rent and watch videos?! Yeah, a convenient video rental store just below. He chastises his men that this project must succeed as all their pay and benefits depend on it. Uhm, an audition to pick a hero to fight Demon Seed?! Yeah, he submitted this proposal while he was drunk. How baffling those higher ups approved it?! Yeah, must be getting desperate. So Hattori is one of the judges in this talent contest. Uh huh. Weird people doing their weird stuffs. Not impressed. So much so you can see the crowd leaving and the crew dismantling all the props. But wait. This last candidate, Maron Namikaze is a shy girl and stammering her lines. But noticing how she easily bends and twists the metal, Hattori instantly hires her. There’s your winner. We see Maron undergoing some idol training and even recording a song of her own. We learn the logic of Hattori using an idol to fight baddies. Would you prefer the riot police gearing up and causing destruction while fighting the baddies or a cute girl? Yeah. The choice is obvious. Meanwhile we see the leader of Demon Seed, Kyouzaburou Demon (yes, that’s his name) and his underlings celebrating all their loot. Demon tells them to spend it all foolishly because that is only when money truly shines. Then he makes a threatening call to the police for his next heist but I guess he got the wrong number. Yeah, luckily ramen store passes this message to the authorities.

With Demon Seed’s next announcement, it couldn’t be better timing as Dr Ryouhei Shimokobe has finished the power suit for Maron. Initially it looked badass but he found out since a woman is going to wear it, made some tweaks to make it look this cute. Yeah. But it works and she’s strong as hell. The day of the heist, Demon Seed just barge into the museum and the cops do nothing! Oh man, it’s like they don’t even exist!!! While they happily loot, Maron gets cold feet to confront them. A few words of encouragement from Hattori before she goes to confront them. So the bad boys think she’s a pushover. They’ll soon be the laughing stock as Maron easily breaks all their metal parts with no sweat. Now beaming with confidence, she is on a roll as she easily takes them all down and throws them outside. No sweat. In the end, Maron’s debut was indeed dazzling. Yup, 3 million yen worth. That’s the amount of damage done and now Hattori is receiving complaint calls from various groups. The Tokyo police, some women’s right group, some culture preservation group and even the Prime Minister himself. Wow. Hattori is sure a popular guy. Make that a wanted guy!

Episode 2
Maron might have been making headlines but it has been 3 months down the road and no sign of Demon Seed. Because of that, Hattori’s side is so bored with nothing to do! In order to restructure their finances, Hattori has an idea. Let’s turn Maron into a real idol singer! So his department is now her staff lackeys as they prepare her for a live TV debut. However she gets nervous and walks into the wrong set. Not only that, her anxiety causes her to accidentally destroy some of the props and the whole set just come crashing down! But wait! Everyone is impressed as she manages to hold up a set with her bare hands. This is it! This will make her famous! And so Maron has become a super idol overnight. Meanwhile we see Demon lying low and the reason for that is because they have no money! Yeah, that Maron girl really wrecked them real good. Should’ve saved some of the money you stole for such rainy days, huh? As Maron becomes more famous, Shimokobe is not impressed because Maron is not supposed to be an idol but a hero of justice. Soon, Demon Seed is back as they receive a few power suits. Then they just walk into a station and hijack it with their message of their next terrorist act. Wow. Just like that?! Of course, the act might be cancelled if it rains. WTF???!!! Based on this, Hattori knows that Demon Seed has received new power suits from Shimokobe since this design is obviously his trademark. However there lies the dilemma. Demon Seed’s siege is on the same day as an award show that Maron is attending. But don’t worry, Hattori sees the weather and it seems it is going to rain. Uhm, so why does he have patrols over the coast. I mean, how the f*ck is he going to control the weather?!

On that night, it is raining. Oh damn, sorry to put a damper on your plans you Demon Seed buddies. Uhm, shouldn’t Demon and his men be waiting in some shelter instead of in the open?! Somebody is gonna catch a cold. Just when the rain isn’t stopping and Demon is about to make his call for cancellation (that wrong number to the ramen store again), the rain stops! Oh yeah. Proceed with the attack! At this point, Hattori’s men do not want to ruin Maron’s moment as she is a nice ordinary girl. They will handle this themselves and let Maron continue with the show. When it is Maron’s turn to take the stage, she decides that she needs to do what she has to and gets off. After all, being an idol is not her thing and the only thing she is good is her strength. We see the tussle between the policemen and Demon Seed. Not even f*cking sure what this pushing game is all about. Maron whizzes through the streets and finally arrives. Yeah, Demon Seed going to be scared again when they see this abomination girl. By the time Hattori’s men arrive, it is all over. The whole place destroyed and Demon Seed taken out. The crowd surrounding Maron and Hattori’s men, it’s not a pleasant one. Yeah, they’re complaining about the destruction and everything. How will they get to work tomorrow! I don’t want to think how much damage is done… In the aftermath, Maron continues to hang out and have fun with Hattori and the guys. She didn’t win the award and rumours are abound that she has retired. Demon Seed having a ramen party to celebrate their comeback? Huh?! Yeah, Demon not looking very happy. Finally, Hattori and co take a group picture with Maron on her graduation day only for Shimokobe to ruin it.

The Voice… Not!
Oh wow. That was… A lot of dumb fun! Honestly, this old series isn’t anywhere near a masterpiece nor is it that bad that it is good. It had a lot of flaws and very dumb ones too but I guess that is where the fun lies. Try not to think too much of its logic especially imposing today’s era of logic onto such animes of yesteryears. Leave your brain at the doorstep to truly enjoy this one should be the best advice I would give for those who want to check this out.

Basically, everything is just screaming dumb like I have said. Don’t think too hard why they even need an idol to fight crime, why the heck Maron has such super strength, why the hell Demon Seed are just dumb criminals, etc. Yes, there are a hell lot more of such burning questions that you want to ask but you’ll never get them answered. All that is matters that Maron and the special department are somehow close enough to enjoy each other’s company and they will have it no other way. They boost each other’s confidence and I guess the most important thing is to be happy with what you do. And for Maron, it isn’t being an idol but of her strength to be of use.

With only a couple of episodes, there is hardly any fleshing out of the characters and it is just obvious they want to push some sort of dumb entertainment with a cute female lead. I’m sure back then when times are simpler, many would’ve accepted it. Maybe not. And when you think of the mind boggling Demon Seed, they’re like baddies but feel more like ordinary people who just cause a whole lot of nuisance. I mean, nobody really serious in taking them down. They can just waltz into anywhere and do their thing because, who really cares to stop them? Uh huh. So it’s like they have this strange relationship with the police and public. Dumb baddies fail so bad that we can’t even hate them! Especially always mistaking the police number with that ramen store! And that Shimokobe is supposed to be some mad scientist, nobody charged him for treason for selling out to Demon Seed?! Yeah, nobody cares.

Of course there is this misconception on my part to think that Maron will be using her voice to take down the enemies but as I have seen, none of that happened! Well, when they put it in the synopsis that she has a catchy voice, I would assume that would be her real power in battle. But of course it wasn’t the case and to say that her voice is catchy is pretty much debatable in my books. Cute, yes. Catchy, not really. Imagine only this girl can take out an evil organization. A shame on all you police department! Thank goodness the enemy is that dumb too. Shame on you Demon Seed!

As you can see, the series is so old that obviously it is a no-brainer to say that the art style and animation are so retro and dated. You can tell it is an anime from that era and from this point in time, it really looks weird because the whole thing looks pretty cartoonish. Anime not really finding its niche yet? Take a look at Hattori’s men. They’re looking a lot like dorks that it makes them look cartoonish. Even Maron herself is cartoonish but because she’s a bit (retro) cute, we overlook that. In that power suit, she looks like a discount version of Sailormoon, doesn’t she? In the end, the entire production is just really mediocre in quality in this department but oh well.

In the voice acting department, one reason why I took a look at this series is because of Norio Wakamoto as Hattori. Ah yes, he sounds very much like I remember him but it’s not one of those breakout roles. Nice to hear him after a very long time. Hiroko Kasahara as the voice of Maron sounds a bit raw but I guess it was one of her early roles. You may know her as Azalyn in The Irresponsible Captain Tylor and Ami of DNA². Of course she has long retired in the voice acting industry. All the songs are sung by her from the opening theme that is the same name of this series to the ending themes, Aitsu and Ama Iro No Yume No Tsubo as well as the insert song, Love & Power. All reeking retro vibes that are up my alley. Even if they are not that exceptional, I’d somehow still prefer to hear these rather than those of today’s animes.

One of the funniest things while watching is of course the bad English translation on screen. I suppose back then online Google translation didn’t exist and it’s a riot when you find such mistakes in Japanese productions. The obvious one being this line: Maron Namikaze, The New Hiroin Of Hige Power Girl! OMG! HIROIN?! You mean, HEROINE?! OH MY GOD! And I’m not sure what Hige means because in Japanese that means beard. So unless they really mean that, they could actually mean huge or high. Either way, it was confusing as it was funny. Then there’s the blatant brand placement parody. In both episodes, this Supovitan C is an actual live action commercial which is of course a parody of the Lipovitan (AKA Livita in other parts of the world) energy drink.

Overall, this might be an under average series but if you don’t think too much about all the dumbness, this can be quite a fun short series to watch. It is quite light hearted and for entertainment purposes so don’t worry about any deep and confusing plots or character developments. Just a simple show about a reluctant hero who just wants to try her best in the things she does. That already makes her a hiro hero. Can we sing and celebrate to that?