eX-Driver

Before self-driving AI cars became a reality today despite still in the infant stages and not yet a worldwide phenomenon, there was eX-Driver. Uh huh. Your retro anime back in 2000 where in a ‘futuristic’ world, obtaining a driving licence isn’t necessary because all cars are self-automated and one could just hop in and ride to you destination. So what if such cars go berserk and out of control? Hence the title of this anime. Yup, you still need humans driving gasoline powered cars and taking some real driving skills to stop those runaway cars and keep the public safe. This is what happens when you let AI take over your life especially the wheel. Oh, I see AI has already taken over our social lives. But that’s a different story. Rev up those engines and get ready to drift and slide with these road warriors! Vroom, VROOOOOOM!!!

Episode 1
Lorna Endou and Lisa Sakakino are chasing down a rogue AI car. After all that flashy chase, they use their gadgets to block its censors and bring it to a halt. There. Simple. And to think such futuristic cars have no emergency halting measures. NOT ONE! Later the duo hangs out at the bar as they talk about their love live. Basically none. But Lisa wants a man who is hot and smart. And he must be a helluva driver too. No wonder she’s single. As they leave, a couple of punks try to hit on them. Losers. Then they realize they are eX-Drivers. Wow. Lisa must have some sort of reputation that makes them scared! Lisa notices an illegal modification of theirs and press its booster button. Bye losers. Then the duo have to put up with kids who admire their cars but act cocky thinking they know everything. But looks like they have a job to do. Remember those loser punks before? Yeah, their car is still out of control! Oh dear. Whose fault is it? Better put a stop to this or it’s on your head! So as they chase it down, Lisa’s car crash. So, she’s going to chase by foot?! Hey, even if she ‘borrows’ a pedal scooter, can she catch up?! Oh right. Shortcuts through the buildings. Eventually she does so but WTF, Lisa picks her up. Shouldn’t she have done that when her car crashed?! I mean, it’s not like they didn’t have a tracker on that rogue car, right?! Dumb. Realizing that their gadgets don’t work, the only method is to lure it out of the city till its battery runs dry. Who knows when that’ll be. After all the drifting and stunts, Lisa’s car starts to malfunction. Damn, I swear their cars are so vulnerable?! Even the rogue AI car is tougher than theirs! Or do they not do good maintenance?! But don’t fear, looks like another eX-Driver is on the way. This time he is cooler in his driving and drifting till he brings the rogue car to a complete halt. Then WTF, instantly Lisa jumps out thinking she has found the man of her dreams and wants to hug him???!!! Turns out to be a kid, Souichi Sugano. Yeah, she is so disappointed! And guess what? Boss Kei Munakata says he is their new partner. Yoroshiku. Lisa so cannot accept this BS! More surprise for them as they head to school because… Souichi is their new transfer student! He just came back from England and skipped a grade. Yeah, this means he is smart. All the qualities you’re looking for in a man, Lisa. But eX-Drivers have to sortie since there is an emergency. Yeah, the great excuse to skip school too.

Episode 2
Lisa complains to Munakata about Souichi. Basically she hates kids. By having this new partner, she thinks they aren’t good enough and still will not accept him. Munakata just stays silent. Later she sees Souichi testing a car on the tracks. She wants to get back at him and prove who’s the boss as she gets into her brand new car and races him. Despite playing dirty, she still loses. Thank goodness she doesn’t crash the car. What’s this? She blames the car not good enough to handle her talent?! F*cking b*tch! Souichi tries to tell her not to abuse her car but she brushes him off. Next day at school, Lisa is dismayed about tomorrow’s test. Oh well, it’s her fault for not listening to the teacher last week. This gives more ammo to Souichi to be sarcastic with her but Lisa is going to prove it by beating him. Heh. We’ll see. So she pulls an all-nighter and studies. In Lorna’s room. But soon she starts to party and I guess Lorna is better off accompanying Souichi doing maintenance on his own car. Yeah, this is much better. By the time she returns, Lisa is already asleep. Looks like her fate is sealed. But early next morning, a rogue vehicle is detected. Our eX-Drivers go into action and Lisa thinks it is chance for her not to take the test! However she is in a dilemma because she can’t save the day too fast or she’ll still have time to go take the test! But Lisa’s pride soon gets the better of her as she doesn’t want to lose out to Souichi despite unanimous decision that he is to take the lead on this mission. Lisa and Souichi butt heads so Lorna has to do something about it herself. Too bad there is only so much she could do until the part they try to box in the vehicle, Lorna gets bummed out. Lisa and Souichi then compromise to work together to bring this runaway to a complete stop. Both of them almost high 5 each other for this outstanding job before backing out the last minute. Yeah, almost accepted each other, huh? However more woes for Lisa because they stopped directly in front of the school and the teacher is so glad thinking Lisa actually wants to take the test! Well, sh*t!

Episode 3
Keyne Tokioka from World News TV wants to do a special programme on eX-Drivers. Well, it’ll be good publicity for them too. Lisa thought she is going to be the main star but looks like Keyne has his eyes on Lorna and wants to make her the main heroine. Bummer. So many of the footage focuses on Lorna in action. Then there’s the test drive moment whereby Lorna gives Keyne a taste of her power slide skills. Don’t faint on me on this low level drifting. There’s more to come! Hold on to your horses! Phew. Somehow Keyne survived all that. With Keyne hanging out more often with Lorna, this makes Lisa and Souichi jealous. They try to get Munakata to stop the filming but I guess this is part of the orders from HQ. So deal with it. That night, Keyne gets permission from Souichi to put mini cameras all around the vehicles. Then they talk about driving and the split decisions that would mean life or death since both their jobs are similar. Souichi is thrown off when Keyne notes that he and Lorna make a good pair. Keyne gets to film eX-Drivers in real action as they go stop a rogue AI car. However soon after they manage to stop it, it is Keyne’s trailer turn to go berserk. Looks like some brakes system malfunctioned and their chance to stop it is to cut some wires in the panel underneath. It is a dangerous mission because Souichi’s plan is to drive underneath the trailer and Lorna will try to cut the wires. Everything has to be precise. There is only very small room for leeway and a slight bump might put everything in jeopardy. So the eX-Drivers go into action. As expected, lots of high speed drama and the bumpy ride has Lorna backing off a few times. It’s a good thing she didn’t lose her head. But they have to hurry. The road is going to end. Yeah, incomplete bridge ahead! Long story short, Lorna manages to cut all the wires but will the trailer brake in time? Some awesome manoeuvre as well as I don’t know how they get to use the bridge’s cables to tie it to the trailer to prevent it further from dropping off the ledge. But it was a damn close one. Lisa so happy she just hugs Souichi and Lisa. So the animosity is gone? In school, the brave action footage is shown as Souichi now understands what Keyne means. Although Souichi and Lisa are still at each other’s throat, notice they get along better than before?

Episode 4
Another day, another rogue car. As our eX-Drivers are having trouble with this one, suddenly here comes a rider, more accurately, eX-Rider to stop the rampage. Again, Lisa thinks she has found the man of her dreams. Too bad, b*tch. It’s a hot chick, Rei Kazama. She is an FAL (Free Agent Licence) and is not attached to any agency and is doing kind of jobs on her own. She is also a long time friend of Nina A. Thunder (one of the staffs at the agency) So as Lisa b*tches about Rei coming into their territory and stealing business, Munakata says that she’ll be working with them for a while. And that’s that. Ogawa who is the main mechanic wants to tinker with her bike but she doesn’t let him. But she lets Souichi? Yeah, lots of sexual subtexts… Wanna touch it? Use your entire body… No wonder Souichi is so damn tired at the end of it! Later she takes a bath, not sure why Souichi is peeping?! Of course she knows it and wants him to get her shampoo. Which is insider her lingerie! Take too long and he gets caught in the act by Lisa and Lorna. They get the wrong idea. Man, if Souichi starts explaining instead of just saying it isn’t what you think, maybe he had a chance… So I guess the girls don’t want to hang out with a pervert so Rei gives him a ride. Hey, he tinkered with her bike so he’s at least got that right to ride with her. He wants to be an FAL like her but she cautions about being perfect because there isn’t anything else to achieve. That’s why she envy them who can drive freely without a care. But it’s time for a job as a rogue AI car has been spotted. No time to return to base so Souichi has to go with Rei. Because of the traffic jam, Lisa and Lorna get stuck. Aha. That’s why the bike is so convenient to traverse through the narrow streets, eh? Despite catching up, some small mishap has Rei sprain her ankle. She can still do her job but Souichi is now riding her bike. Can this shorty reach?! Well, if Rei is guiding. So they manage to stop the car eventually with some cool bike stunts to boot with. Also, with another runaway car nearby, time to let Lisa and Lorna shine a bit and strut their stuff. Another successful mission. Lisa gets jealous seeing Rei and Souichi together. Did she kiss him?! Can’t tell from that awkward distance and angle… Eventually Rei parts and hopes they can meet again. Especially Souichi. They can continue to do stuffs together, you know… Wink, wink… Cue for everyone to tease this very embarrassed kid.

Episode 5
Lorna and Lisa are having their day off. It is that dilemma that with no rampaging AI cars lately, although this means a much safer city, this also means eX-Drivers aren’t needed and they could be out of a job. It’s like Lisa jinxing it because she wants some action and yeah, here comes a runaway car. This one is a little dangerous as the bumper and wheel came off! Eventually they manage to stop it but as they examine the car, there is no one in it but recording equipment. This means somebody set the wheel and bumper to come off on purpose. Unknown to them, a shady group of guys are watching and recording their actions. They believe they are the best eX-Drivers around but notes there is another kid who is better. Back at base, after more quarrelling with Souichi, it gets deep because Lisa thinks if eX-Drivers are really no longer needed, this means she has no more chance to settle with Souichi. Like, WTF?! Oh yeah. Even Lorna is starting to worry about their future. Later Munakata tells his crew about the recent cars fitted with illegal programmes. Definitely a shady organization is behind this and although no major damage has been caused, who knows what they’ll do in the future. One day as Lisa and Lorna are about the head off to the beach with their friends, suddenly rogue cars are spotted. They are stumped because the police didn’t report it. Wait a minute. The rogue cars are gasoline cars. No wonder the system couldn’t detect them. Lorna not sure how to tackle rogue gasoline cars because it’s not in the manual? Lisa just screws it and will take what comes. It’s more fun that way. Obviously the drivers of those cars are testing Lisa. They box her in and when she lets he guard down thinking she beat them, she crashes into a ramp. WTF Lorna speeds up to use her own car to cushion her fall?! Definitely both cars are wrecked but Lorna horrified since Lisa is badly injured. She is wheeled into ICU but Lisa can’t die yet. Not until she has a rematch with that kid. So it’s up to Souichi now. Yeah, the guys whom the baddies want to play with. They try the same trick but Souichi proves superior. He also has tricks them with his own ploy. Until their leader joins in the fray and Munakata then realizes and confirms it is Joe Todo, the one behind this. Again, they box Souichi in until his car crashes and is a total wreck. They leave him in their dust as they laugh away to victory.

Episode 6
Don’t worry, Lisa is okay. She just needs a little rest. Oh, what is Souichi doing here?! How did he get here anyway?! So he’s here just to say he couldn’t beat those guys? Todo and co continue to drive as the please around the city. Out of fuel? No problem. A refuelling trailer allows them to refuel on the go! So you bet our eX-Drivers can’t rest and head back to work just to put a stop to this. They watch a video from Todo, claiming he wants to challenge Munakata’s team to his. Something about Munakata saying being an eX-Driver isn’t anything special. So now Todo wants to show how it takes real skills like theirs to drive gasoline cars rather than controlled by AI. Cue for Munakata to explain who Todo is. He was once his staff of his but strayed. Munakata warned him but Todo didn’t like it and left the team. So looks like fixing up 3 cars needs at least 72 hours. Even with Ogawa getting help from the eX-Drivers. So how? Munakata contacts Todo and will race him personally tomorrow. Later, Nina tells Munakata not to do this but the old guy has to do what he has to do. Apparently Lorna overheard this and rats to her pals. So next morning as Munakata is about to leave, he is shocked to see his car dismantled! OGAWA!!! And looks like they rushed up fixing Souichi’s car because he is going to race in his stead. Souichi arrives at the gasoline plant and races with Todo’s henchmen first. Souichi outsmarts them until they crash and put out of commission. Now it’s the final race with Todo. It seems on the final lap, Souichi lets him pass. Todo celebrates thinking he has won. Souichi then goes off on his job to stop a runaway bus with kids. Before Todo could go after him, Rei stops him and points out his driving caused his suspension to be on the verge of breaking. Souichi most likely noticed this and gave way. Looks like Lorna and Lisa’s cars are fixed too so they go help Souichi. Todo gets to see first-hand how awesome they do their job. He is baffled why they can drive for others like that. Cue for Munakata to tell him people like them who have skills have the responsibility to use them properly. That is what it means to be a true eX-Driver. So basically, with great powers comes great responsibilities?! Todo realizes and admits his defeat. In the aftermath, our eX-Drivers hold a go-kart workshop, educating kids about cars. And of course, a go-kart faceoff between Souichi and Lisa. Sorry folks, no red or blue shell. Hehehe…

OVA
Taking place a few years before Lisa and Lorna joined the agency, this OVA focuses on Nina and Rei. Yeah, I guess they had budget constraints that time and only had 1 car to boot. So the pair is like always ‘friendly’ bickering and stuffs. One mission has them chase down a rogue vehicle which is actually a mini radio controlled car. Yeah, it has a Nina doll in it too. Anyway, they are so reckless that they’re causing a lot of property damage. Munakata must be trying to withhold his anger… Eventually when they catch up to the mini car, it self-destructs. Nice mini fireworks. Back at the base, they try to deduce the culprit behind this and it could be a stalker of Nina. True enough, this creepy guy, Mark is watching her every move. That night when she goes home, she gets a creepy call from him, wanting to play with her and he’ll always be watching her. Yeah. Don’t let that creep intimidate you. The next time on another mission, Nina alone tries to hunt down the car while Munakata orders Rei to go find the source of the signal. This leads her to destroy all the hidden cameras around town and eventually Mark’s hideout. He’s not at home but look at all the photo collections he has on Nina! Creepy! Nina follows the car to a warehouse but she gets careless and gets gassed out. When she comes to, WTF Mark dressing up as Rei and wanting to play with her?! He wants to ride in her car with her?! Yeah, I bet he wants to ride her too! It might be dumb for him to just tie her arms but leave her legs untied but I am thinking he wanted to f*ck her. Because Nina kicks his crotch and runs away. Then she stumbles into a time bomb. By the time Rei arrives to beat him up and save her, time’s up. Boom!

Munakata is worried his girls might be dead. However at the same time, one of his staffs, Toma betrays Munakata. Looks like he has gotten all the data he needs. Something about Munakata scoffed off his idea that he claims is better than this eX-Driver thingy. As Toma is about to get away, our eX-Driver girls call back and heard his rant. I don’t know how they escaped the bomb but don’t tell me they hid in a locker because that is how Mark was found and arrested! Is this crap how Indiana Jones got that stupid misleading idea???!!! Anyway, the girls try to hunt Toma down but they have to face off with his Humvee. Can’t fight that. Run! Plus, Toma isn’t in the vehicle and on his way to the airport. The Humvee is self-automated by his programme and will chase down the girls and explode upon contact. Can’t run forever. So the girls drive to the airport. Just in time as Toma’s self-automated plane is about to fly off. In this bold precise timing move (AKA BS move), what they do is, Nina steps on the pedal till she catches up with the plane. Then she this the brakes just enough to let the Humvee touch from behind, and then stepping on the pedal again (this time Rei messing with some circuit to give some extra booster) to swerve off. With the Humvee now in contact with the plane, it explodes! Damn, just the tail portion of the plane gone? I don’t even know how such a huge plane could come to a grinding halt! Anyway, Toma’s days are numbered, he gets arrested and what about the unsurmountable damage they caused? No worries. Let Munakata handle it. I can see why there was a change in the team later on…

Care For Another Spin?
That’s it for me. I’m giving the movie sequel a miss because you know, it’s over an hour long. It’s like having a long drive without taking a break and getting out to stretch. I know it’s a dumb reason and excuse but the same could be said for this series too! Haha! At least in a general sense. So while it isn’t related, I can also see why self-driving cars aren’t taking off or being the next popular trend. With vehicles going wild and humans not having any control or even skill to handle it, you could say we are not ready for such technology. Heck, I don’t think we ourselves or at least a big part of us are not even mature to drive a car! Say what you will, even with the best technology in safety and comfort, I think the big majority of humans still suck in driving. It basically boils down to attitude. Oh, strayed a bit there for a while.

So well, I guess the anime is pretty okay. At least in the sense that if you are looking for some retro car driving adrenaline action, this series is pretty sufficient for that level. It has got some cool car chases and those are probably the best moments because that’s what this series is about in the first place, right? Basically, man and machine against, uhm, AI machine. It goes to show that no matter how high-tech your self-driving car is, you still need the human touch to fix things when things screw up. I don’t know how frequent rogue car incidents will happen but to have such agencies to specifically deal with this, it just shows that the companies behind the self-driving AI cars aren’t probably interested in improving it. After all, a big bulk of the citizens can’t drive and rely on your transportation services. And it just feels pretty dumb that when the vehicle goes out of control, it just continues to accelerate! I mean, it doesn’t even to any emergency stop in case of such failures! The AI must be damn dumb! Oh right. Cue for your fast car action. But you get the logic I’m saying. It’s a good thing there are no casualties when such runaway cars happen. Because so high-tech that other working self-driving cars will nicely step and stop aside. Clearing a convenient path for the rogue vehicle and eX-Drivers to give us some car chasing adrenaline. So you’re screwed and in a hurry because your car is stalled until the chase is done. And to think that self-transportations like bicycles or skateboards didn’t catch on here seeing how frequent such incidents. Geez.

Another thing that boggles me is how they just shoot some substance to block censors or throw their gadgets to quell the rampaging software just to get the runaway vehicle to stop. I mean, shouldn’t they have at least another partner sitting beside them to do all that while letting the driver to you know, focus on driving?! I mean, look at Nina and Rei’s example. I thought that was okay despite they themselves distracting each other but it is so much plausible. But why do Lisa, Lorna and Souichi get to drive solo? Sure, probably more car action and to see them show off their cool skills. I mean, more cars = more action and it’s good for them if they can both drive and deal with the rogue vehicle. Or does the agency don’t have funds to higher more staffs as partners? Okay, whatever they feel comfortable with.

With only a handful of episodes and not even a proper season cour, the stories are nothing much to tell. Heck, each episode feels like standalone filler episodes and aren’t related to each other whatsoever. This is probably what stops this series from scoring more points especially for those who want something more than just the car action. I mean, it basically follows the same formula of having a rogue car and our eX-Drivers have to be called into action to stop it. That’s the staple of the series. Everything else feels like added spice to ramp up the drama. Yeah, like Lisa’s crash and being sent to ICU but she quipped about being and immortal and just like that her injuries are gone and she’s back in action. If I was in her shoes, if I survived that sh*t, I’ll forever be a vegetable!!! No joke! So if you’re looking for a good story to invest in, this is not the series you’re looking for. No wonder this didn’t get any sequels thereafter or even a reboot or remake. Or did they just forget this series altogether? Well then. Let’s just wait for some nostalgic nerd to bring it up to the top big guns producers…

With the main focus on the cars, I guess the characters are just pretty basic and not very interesting to look deeper into. I mean, they could but they didn’t. So let’s just leave it as that. Like our current main eX-Drivers, Souichi is a boy genius and that’s that. Lisa on the other hand is the hot headed one so you bet there is going to be some clashes with the kid just for you know, to kick up some human drama. After all, cars here don’t have the AI like Knight Rider so it’s the humans who have to bicker and conflict with themselves. Yeah, I’m glad they leave the cars out of the stupid human pride drama. Anyway, just like poles apart, Lorna is the gentler and feminine one compared to the bold and tomboyish Lisa. Is this why and how they get along so well? Anyway, Lisa-Souichi arguing feels pretty cliché because you can see that they don’t really hate each other’s guts and it might be their way of covering up their feelings for each other. Hey, don’t want cheesy romance to ruin this car action show. Same can be said for Souichi and Lisa. A few blushing moments when they get too close but don’t let that distract you from the cars. That’s what we’re here for, right?! And Lisa, don’t you blame the cars for your own failure! Basically a carpenter blaming his own tools. That’s what happens when your ego is too big. Bigger than the biggest gas guzzling car in the world.

Nina and Rei don’t fare any better themselves and their single OVA just to give them more of the spotlight and nothing else. If not, a slightly weird dynamism since they argue more than the Lisa and Lorna pair and do sillier and bolder stuff than them. And I think there’s this subtle running joke that these eX-Driver girls have dreams of wanting to date their guys of their dreams but they end up having to put up with creepy ones and really other weird guys. Hey, they are in a line where mostly male interest dominates. Big boys’ toys. They’re the only hot chicks around so, got to put up with that one too. Hey, they’re cute enough to be models and have a higher chance to score better guys (but at the same time attract even more creepy weirdoes) but I guess their love is fast cars so got to live with that too.

Oh, a few fanservice too but it feels dated seeing how retro this anime is. It comes off mostly as cheesy (especially that sexual subtext with Rei and Souichi) but I guess if you’re watching this series, you’re here for the metallic fanservice rather than the sexy fanservice of the flesh. There are better and proper series (read: Porn) for that. So what if you could spot some human tits (I didn’t see any, by the way), move along because we’re here to get our orgasm looking at the sleek curves of the Caterham Super Seven, Subaru Impreza or Lotus Europa. Sorry Ferrari, Porsche and Lamborghini fans, no such fast cars here.

Animation wise, honestly for a retro series like this, the designs and details of the cars look quite good. It better be. For this kind of genre it had to. But my complaint is that during the car action scenes, the animation can be somewhat jerky a little. It’s not a smooth ride so to speak. Well, I can blame it on technology limitations at that time. However the OVA that employs CGI on cars feel dated. It’s not the worse CGI I have ever seen but they really feel dated and one kind. Hence affecting the animation a little. And of course it goes without saying that the character designs look dated from that era. Like how Lorna reminds me of Love Hina’s Naru and Shouichi looking like Mao from Chuuka Ichiban. Another cool part of this series are the retro rock opening and ending themes. They fit the adrenaline rush theme of the series perfectly and they’re pretty cool to hear. So don’t mind me for a while as I’m gonna listen to the opener, Kaze Ni Nare by JAM Project with Horonobu Kageyama and Rika Matsumoto as well as the ending themes, Sniper by Milk and Akogi Na Futari Tabidaze by Masaaki Endou and Hironobu Kageyama.

Overall, this series is just okay and passable in many ways. Though it is not bad, it is certainly not that good either. I mean, if you are talking about anime series that involves car action, Initial D comes to mind and you know how popular that series is having so many sequels after that. Speed Racer comes to mind too but that feels a lot like for kiddies. At least for me. Not sure about the rest like Wangan Midnight, Capeta or Redline since I didn’t see those. However I’m not too mad about cars to go check out right now or in the near future. But for now, a truly safe and comfortable self-driving world remains elusive until we can become better humans. When that happens, I suppose we also lose the ability to pick up hot chicks in our cars, huh? Is that still a trend nowadays?! Still, remember to drive safely and responsibly!