Gunslinger Girl

October 22, 2017

I wonder if it is considered child abuse sending little girls to do dirty jobs like murder and assassination. Wait. What’s that I said?! You heard that right. A certain government in Europe had this twisted idea to use little girls (albeit with cybernetic enhancements) to do their dirty work to eliminate people they don’t like or deemed as a threat. What kind of a sick story or joke is this? However despite this grim setting of Gunslinger Girl (no, it’s not some western spaghetti), the series does not focus so much on the assassinations they are required to do but rather their tragic story of how they cope with their emotions as they seek warmth and love just like any ordinary little girls amidst carrying out their ruthless missions from their higher ups as child assassins.

Episode 1
The Fratello, agents (Handlers) and their partners are trying to storm into a certain building to apprehend a key witness. One of them being Jose and Henrietta. They pose as a reporter trying to interview a certain person but the guy behind the door refuses them. Jose remains adamant so that guy goes out to get rough with him. Then it triggered Henrietta. She kills him! When his other comrades start to return fire, she takes out her machine gun and guns them all down with no emotions and no mercy! Flashback shows Jose was to be assigned to a young assassin girl. He asked why the agency used young girls. Something about physical modifications and brainwashing work better. So when Henrietta woke up from her slumber, she became his partner. She never rested and continued training to improve herself since he told her to become proficient quickly. After gunning everyone down and the remaining ones taken out by sniper fire, Jose calls mission control to say that mission has failed. Believing the witness is still in the building, another team is tasked to find the witness in which they eventually found hiding. Jose asks why Henrietta went berserk. It never happened before. She stood there visibly shaken. Her arm is wounded. He covers her with his coat and they go home. Later Jose talks to his higher ups. Jose doesn’t want to condition her too much since it will shorten her lifespan. Jose can get a new one once she is used up but he doesn’t want to. They think he is too emotionally attached to her. As Henrietta is an excellent assassin, it is a waste to dispose of her. They hope he can make her understand big mistakes are inexcusable. Jose remembers Henrietta was the only survivor as her family was massacred. The first time he saw her at the hospital, her mind and body were ragged. It could be out of pity that he felt he wanted to help her. After a while, looks like Henrietta finally answered Jose on why she went berserk. She just wanted to help him.

Episode 2
Jose narrates the Social Welfare Agency is a government sponsored lifesaving corporation. In actual fact it gives dying patients another chance at life with cybernetic implants and conditions them to handle their dirty work. Henrietta undergoes surgery but is warned being dependent on this would suffer from memory dysfunction. The doctor advises Jose to condition her more because trying to treat a cyborg girl like a normal girl would only result in unhappiness. Jose also tried to teach Henrietta social etiquette. But when a waiter was clearing the table, the way he picked up the utensils looked dangerous so Henrietta immediately pins him down and would have killed him had not Jose stopped her. Henrietta wakes up from a ‘bad dream’ whereby Jose in addition to teaching how to do long range sniping, lets her look up at the beautiful sky and Venus. After the surgery is done, Henrietta feels lost so she seeks advice from her comrades, Triela and Claes. They treat her to cake and tea and tell her not to worry about it. That night, Henrietta is surprised that Jose takes her to see stargazing. He isn’t mad at her. He lets her see Orion and tells of the tragic love story of Orion and Artemis.

Episode 3
Henrietta was always sick and thus never left hospital. Her parents were always arguing about this. So when she was fitted with cybernetic implants 2 years ago, she finally got to move freely. She loves her life at the agency and also plays the violin as Jose introduced her to it. She has Rico as her roommate. The girls are in their usual training when a call comes in. All training will be stopped for this next mission. The target is Mascart, a politician from the opposition party and his secretary. The assassination will take place in 1 week. Before each session, Mascart and is secretary will hole up in this hotel to scour over documents. The agency has booked the entire floor so they can carry out their mission smoothly. Rico is tasked to survey the place. As she tries to enter from the back, she meets this porter boy, Emilio. Love at first sight? Because this boy can’t stop talking and she actually listens to him! She had to cut short this meeting when her Handler, Jean calls for her. He notes her running late. Did she bump into anyone? She lies no. He reminds her to kill anybody who sees her during a job. Later Rico tells this to Henrietta. Because Emilio thought she was a musician, she hopes Henrietta could teach her how to play the violin. An amateur teaching a newbie how to play… As the mission begins, Rico enters the room as room service and immediately kills both men. When she leaves the room, she unexpectedly bumps into Emilio. He is shocked and confused to see her here in their hotel’s uniform. Rico is lost for words. How will she get out of this? Well, there is only one way. The same gun she used on the politicians will now be used on him. Sorry. Bye. In the aftermath, Rico narrates she wakes up every morning wonder if her body is still here. If it does, it is wonder to know her body still works. She loves her life at the agency.

Episode 4
Triela nudges Henrietta to summon her courage to ask Jose to spend time with her for Christmas. Triela apprehends a baddie as her Handler, Hilshire wants to ask him questions. Because he pulls out a gun, she shoots him. This doesn’t please Hilshire as he tells her not to shoot without his permission. She dares him to condition her more. Of course he doesn’t wish for that so he asks Jose for advice on how to get along with her. On a mission to Naples, the duo are supposed to search for a retired Mafia boss, Mario. He has been running around Europe but rumours have it he is back here. Their job is to bring him back to the agency for protection as he is a valuable witness to testify against the mafia organization, thus why the mafia are trying to hunt him down too. Hilshire and Mario were also ‘associates’ and know each other. They manage to get him and though Mario agrees to go with them, he needs to do something here now. As he is cuffed to Triela, she has to accompany him to toilet. He tells his story that he once trafficked kids in Amsterdam and that was when he met Hilshire working as Europol’s investigator. He let him escape for insider info. Hilshire was fired when found out and subsequently joined the agency. Slick Mario gives Triela the slip, chaining his end of the handcuff to the stall while escaping himself. Mario thought he has lost her when the mafia aides surround him to bring him to their boss. But Mario is confident as he knows someone dangerous will show up. True enough Triela comes rushing down and raining bullets on them. In the aftermath when she asks why he came to Naples, he wants to see his daughter. After the trafficking, he considered quitting and reflected on all the bad things he had done. He sent her Christmas presents every year but this year he vowed to give it to her in person. Triela lets him go and will report to Hilshire as she lost him. When Mario asks about her parents, she doesn’t remember except that she was found in the Amsterdam trafficking. Hilshire heard all that so Triela is surprised when he is nice to her when he asks what she wants for Christmas. He got her a teddy bear as per requested. Strangely, Mario also sent her a teddy bear present.

Episode 5
Jean sees his former military police captain, Claudio Raballo to bring him out of retirement to the agency. He is given Claes to handle. As he trains her, he finds she isn’t a sharpshooter and has her shoot until she hits every target. So when she hasn’t returned in a day, Jean tells him about how each girl is different and how it takes time for implants to grow accustomed to implants. Raballo realizes Claes has been shooting since yesterday! He goes to get her. Back in his room, they talk about the books they love to read. Currently Raballo is reading on how to plant vegetables. In case of aliens invasion. Seriously? Then he takes her out fishing. She learns his limp is due from a gunshot during his days as a police. In the agency, they look like proper teacher-student. But outside, he takes her fishing and they bond closer. It’s their unspoken rule. One night on a mission, Claes is to handle a few subway punks. Unfortunately she killed them (though, permitted) but she herself got stabbed (pulled her gun too slow). During training, Raballo notices Henrietta inconsistent. When a bullet is stuck in her gun, he slaps it away from her. Because he scolds Jose, Henrietta gets ready to attack him. Similarly, Claes goes to defend him. All calms down when Jose tells Henrietta to stop. Once Jean learns about this, he thought the girls need to have several pages rewritten. A few days later, Claes heard Raballo is quitting the agency. He claims he just needs some time for himself. Though he has been training her to become stronger, he feels uneasy with it. He gives her his key to his room to read all the books she wants as well as glasses so that she will be gentle when she puts them on. Shortly, Jean comes in to tell Claes that Raballo is dead in a hit and run accident. She goes into shock. The higher ups deem her useless but the scientists have some use for her. Claes tells us she doesn’t leave the agency grounds nor participate in missions. Instead she is a guinea pig for whatever experiments the scientists have in mind. As she takes Henrietta to grow vegetables, the latter asks if she is lonely without a partner. She’ll die if Jose is not around. Claes with confidence tells her back that she will decide if she is lonely or not.

Episode 6
Jose talks to Enzo about the recent bomb disarmament in a subway and one near the national museum. Enzo feels odd because it was too easy. Like as though they are amateurs or a distraction for something else. Then they go spy on Enrico Perdini, an ultra-left terrorist in the Republican Faction (RF) responsible for last year’s bombing incidents. Henrietta eavesdrop on their talk. Something political. Something about funding. So there is an entire team tailing Enrico in hopes of catching him in the act of meeting up with the bomb makers. Enrico might have given Enzo’s men the slip but he didn’t realize men from the agency still tailing him. They are unsure of his intentions because he is walking around Rome like as though he is going sight-seeing. When Enrico returns to his hideout, he calls the bomb makers, Franca and Franco. They are not pleased their meeting is in Rome where it is the jurisdiction of the agency. He wanted to scout the place and believing their hands are full now focusing on the museum, he wants the bombs delivered at the appointed time tonight. Franca and Franco don’t really like to deal types like Enrico since he is a lost cause but since it is an order from the higher ups, they have to do it. They wonder if they should send him fake bombs. When Enrico’s men stake out for the appointed meeting, they notice something strange about the traffic. No cars are passing. A distance away there has been an accident. Could it be a cover up for a raid? Enrico has his men outside investigate but they are taken out by Henrietta and Triela. Then they storm into the place to take out the other men. Henrietta poses as a lost scared girl to get close to them and take them out. Enrico is finally cornered and gives up. In the aftermath as Jose treats Henrietta to gelato, they accidentally pass by Franca and Franco. They are relieved Enrico got arrested. Thinking that Henrietta belongs to a well to do family, it is girls like them that RF is supposed to protect.

Episode 7
Jean and Rico posing as a salesman and his sister on a business trip, meet Filippo Adani who is an accountant and also on vacation here in Firenze. Filippo seems knowledgeable in the arts and even accompanies them to an art museum. Jean notices a couple of men spying on Filippo and also making shady terrorism orders. On pretence to go make a phone call, Jean interrogates one of them in the toilet. It seems they are from RF and are following Filippo to eliminate him and recover Bigliazzi’s private ledger. When they leave the art museum, somewhere in the alley they are surrounded by those men. They threaten to kill innocent people if Filippo doesn’t hand over the ledger. Filippo is about to do it to spare Rico’s life but that isn’t necessary. Jean and Rico go into action and shoot them dead. They start running when more men come chasing. While they hide, Filippo explains why he is wanted. The ledger exposes Bigliazzi’s funding to RF. Also, he heard about their terrorist plot that they didn’t want it leaked. Filippo loved arts but his father wanted him to become an accountant like he wanted. So he gave up his dream of being one. But being an accountant he discovered his father dodged tax for 20 years and funding terrorist groups. He couldn’t take it anymore and ran away. Knowing Bigliazzi was in cahoots with the police, if he was going to be assassinated, he wanted to see Firenze one last time. They continue to make a run but Filippo gets shot in the hand. They manage to make it to Jose and Henrietta waiting for them. A car chase ensues. So as not to involve the tourists, they had to drive to somewhere deserted before the girls could return fire and stop the chase. Filippo thinks he is done for and is glad he visited those cities one last time. He is tired of living. Rico thinks it would be a waste if he dies. It would be better if he drew paintings in this world and besides, Firenze is such a beautiful place.

Episode 8
Dr Fernando Bianchi examines Henrietta. Despite saying she is okay, he wants her to control her emotions. Next he examines Angelica. First he lets her see pictures and see how many she recognizes. When asked about the pasta story, she doesn’t remember. Bianchi then talks to Jose and Marco Toni (Angelica’s Handler). He wants Jose to have more faith in Henrietta while Marco to renew his former interest in Angelica. However Marco is frustrated. He worked hard to teach Angelica a lot of stuffs but those conditioning doctors made her forget everything. Marco continues to treat Angelica indifferent and tells her to do more training. Flashback reveals Angelica was almost killed by her parents. Her father’s factory had gone bankrupt and prior to that he took out a life policy on his daughter. The worst, right? At that time, Marco was hired into the agency upon Bianchi’s recommendation after getting fired for his failing eyesight. He is introduced to Angelica whom the doctors just saved from death. As he accompanies her, he starts telling her the pasta story to divert her attention away from the pain. Didn’t work. But she would like to hear more of it. As Marco’s unit rarely sees any action, they spend more time trying to come up with that pasta story! Marco also had a girlfriend who is a children’s storybook writer, Patricia. Because of the secrecy of his job, he can’t tell her much except to care for a child and telling her stories. One day, his unit members got into a fight. Angelica tried to stop them and got slightly injured. At the same time, cybernetics were introduced and Marco’s unit was sent into action. After the successful mission, the unit members apologize to Angelica but she doesn’t remember them. Marco became devastated. Patricia broke up with him although she heard from Bianchi about the pasta story and turned it into a book. Now Marco doesn’t tell Angelica the story anymore. He doesn’t want to think his actions were in vain but she no longer remembers the story.

Episode 9
Once Lauro gives the okay sign, Elsa barges into the room and guns down everyone Rambo style! Wow. She also takes pictures of evidence as ordered. As Elsa is also one of those cyborg girls at the agency, she rarely mixes with the rest and always stays in her room by herself. She only sticks closely to Lauro. Lauro talks to Jose that they are working together for the next mission. It is to take out a local police chief. Lauro killed an officer of his as warning but he remained stubborn to back down and even threatened to reveal the agency’s existence. Thus the agency has approved his assassination. Henrietta goes to Elsa’s room to talk to her. However Elsa has nothing to say to her and warns if she gets in Lauro’s way, she’ll kill her. Asked why she is being a lone wolf, Elsa asks back if other cyborgs are your own partner is more important. As Lauro is most important to her, nothing else matters. She will use all his time for him. She claims the rest do not have love. Henrietta protests because she loves Jose too. In that case there is nothing more to talk. As they set up their sniping position, Lauro could see Elsa quite eager. They have one shot to pull this assassination. Elsa watches in envy how close Henrietta is to Jose. As the target pulls up, Lauro notices Elsa not focusing. Heck, her gun safety is still on. This forces Lauro to order Jose to switch with her. The target is perfectly taken out with Jose hitting the first time followed by Henrietta just to make sure. Time to escape. But Elsa only stood there in shock. Lauro calls her useless and leaves her there.

Episode 10
Henrietta is surprised Jose is taking her on a trip to Sicily. Did something happen? Elsa and Lauro were found murdered in the park. The murderers have not been found yet. Henrietta looks at it in a positive light since Elsa will now forever be with Lauro. Jean and Rico spearhead the investigation. He believes the culprits could be from RF, the southern mafia or another government agency. Pietro Fermi from Section 1 (another section of the agency) is told by his boss that this is the best time to put some pressure on Section 2 (Handlers and their cyborg girls) because he ultimately wants this section closed. So he and his assistant, Eleanora Gabrielli do their own investigation and mostly they ask Jean lots of questions regarding the agency and the Fratello. Fermi tries to test what Jean said is true about the cyborg girls so he throws a coin at him. Rico swiftly grabs it and points her gun at him all within a blink of an eye. Further investigations showed that Elsa fired 2 shots but the bullets are missing. Fermi and Gabrielli visit Elsa’s room which is drab and empty. Then they go talk with Triela. So far the cyborg girls aren’t really sad over Elsa’s death because she was a loner and how close she was to Lauro. Jean receives the results from the bullets that killed Elsa and Lauro. It hints that this is going to be troublesome. Jean suggests hiding the ballistics info and blame it on malfunction. That way the pressure on them would stop if they admit it is their own mistake. They will report it is Elsa fought and died for her master. Further investigations show the blood sample of the murderers found at the park belonged to suspects from RF. Fermi asks Rico if she would gladly die for her master. Jean interjects that it is only natural they do so. Thus Rico replies if he says so, then so be it.

Episode 11
Fermi and Gabrielli head to Sicily to visit Jose and Henrietta on holiday. They know where they are because Triela told them and also to learn better about the Handler and cyborg girls’ relationship. Jose has Henrietta cook dinner but since he hints it won’t taste tasty, Gabrielli supervises her. They have to buy ingredients so they go out shopping. Along the way, a snatch thief snatches Henrietta’s bag. She chases after him and when she catches up, grabs him by the neck. Gabrielli uses her police authority to stop what is happening. She lets the thief go if he returns the handbag otherwise she can arrest him as he reeks of marijuana. The handbag is important to Henrietta as Jose bought a camera for her. Meanwhile the guys talk things out. Jose explains about the conditioning of the girls and how Handlers are free to condition however they want as long as they get the job done. Though he doesn’t condition Henrietta much nor forces her to love him. Either way, Fermi finds it disgusting to have a partnership like that because even if it doesn’t look like much doesn’t make it acceptable. Jose agrees. Fermi is also suspicious that everything sounds too convenient. When Elsa and Lauro were found murdered, suddenly they knew who did it. As Jose explains about the cyborgs’ enhanced abilities, Fermi didn’t like how he was trying to paint the girls protected their master. It may be the truth but it isn’t right. In the end, these girls are just normal teens. Is Jose saying he would be okay if Henrietta dies for him? When Gabrielli tries to tell how Henrietta should act like a girl, she starts crying. Jose was trying to do the same to her. She knows she is strong enough to kill people. As a cyborg, she cannot be useful to Jose as a normal girl. She knows how Elsa died and has the rest gathered. First she asks if Elsa loved Lauro. Definitely. Did Lauro love her back? Not really. He was too busy focusing on work. Imagine having an unrequited love. It was too much to bear for Elsa after realizing he would never feel the same way. She shot him in the back before turning the gun on herself. Henrietta even demonstrates this! Jose and Fermi rush to grab her gun. Phew. What a scare. She assures she will never do this because he is so nice to her. Later Fermi says he won’t tell this to his boss because by now Section 2 must have destroyed all evidence. Flashback shows Elsa did that because Lauro didn’t remember named her here at this park. He didn’t really care about it.

Episode 12
Angelica sprains her ankle during training. The higher ups don’t really like since after Elsa’s incident and now this. Since they have been producing results, they are allowed to continue for now but can’t keep covering for Section 2 forever. Jean briefs the team of their next mission. RF plans to abduct Caterina Sanctis, the daughter of a powerful senator. It is suggested to use one of the cyborg girls as decoy in her place. This will lead them to their hideout and they will wipe them all out. It is risky but they need results. It is suggested Claes will be the decoy. The plan goes well as Claes is abducted and the terrorists have not figured out who she is as a ransom note to the senator is made shortly. Claes is calm and reading her book while being watched over. Franca talks to her and because of her mature answer, Franca hopes she can teach these idiots a lesson. One, she believes these blokes are planning not to let Claes leave because they are letting her see all their faces. The agency has tracked Claes being held in the mountains. They make their haste and preparations stealthily and give the terrorists the element of surprise by gunning all of them down! Claes isn’t going to be a damsel in distress. She overwhelms her watcher and then takes out the electricity. Angelica defied orders and runs to rescue Claes. At this point she isn’t in her room. A terrorist catches her. Although luckily Claes returned and killed the terrorist, the stray bullet injured Angelica. As she is stretchered away, Marco scolds her for being reckless. Angelica recovers and the girls wish her well. But she doesn’t look happy. Suddenly out of character she bursts that they’re all going to die without knowing the truth. If Marco is going to treat her coldly, she might as well die now. Claes slaps her. If she wants to die, then go ahead. She shouldn’t have saved her then.

Episode 13
What Angelica said still bothers Henrietta. Marco apparently overheard that so now he is on a personal mission to find Angelica’s old dog? On Jose’s advice, Henrietta pays Angelica another visit. It seems Angelica is reminiscing about Pedro, her old dog. Angelica might be losing her memories because shortly she says she didn’t realize Henrietta was here. And subsequently when Claes visits to apologize, Angelica doesn’t recognize who visited before her. Henrietta confronts Marco that Angelica is talking about Pedro. Can we help find it? Marco says don’t bother. He doesn’t know where her old dog is. Henrietta hopes Marco could go see Angelica even if he can’t do anything for her now. Just be with her. He then asks if she is afraid of dying. No. Not afraid fighting and dying for Jose. Does she resent being given a mechanical body, a gun and a short lifespan? If he pities them for that, he is mistaken. This may be conditioning but she is fine with it. Even so, she is still fine with it and believes Angelica feels the same way. While the girls go watch the meteor shower that night, Marco pays Angelica a visit. She is happy to see him. She wants him to read that pasta story and amidst Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, Angelica closes her eyes and sleeps… Forever? :’(.

Il Teatrino

Episode 1
A demonstration in Rome turns ugly and violent. Section 2 is monitoring the situation and predicts the Republicans may use this as an opportunity. The Fratello are sent in to observe. An explosion occurs near Jose and Henrietta. He is just slightly injured but no biggie. They notice one of the police officers backing out and running away into a van. They give chase by borrowing Priscilla’s Vespa. Too bad she won’t get it back in one piece… The van is guided into a small alley whereby the Fratello ambush them. Some are killed on the spot while some are injured and taken into custody. Back in the agency, Henrietta visits Jose’s room but he isn’t in. Creepily she starts hugging and smelling his shirt while lying on his bed. Then she sits in his chair. What is she? Goldilocks? Then she opens a present he supposedly bought for her from France on his table. It is a golden kaleidoscope but underneath it states it is for the person he loves the most, Louise Antoinette Rolle. Must be his girlfriend. Don’t feel too good now, eh? Henrietta tells Triela and Claes about it. Claes explains that person must be dead over a century ago. That name belongs to a French writer’s lover in which he based one of his stories on her. The name of that character was Henrietta. Thus the present is for her. Relieved Henrietta goes back to Jose’s room to apologise but he isn’t mad about somebody leaving a mess in his room and takes her to see the stars. Later it is revealed Claes lied about this story. She made it up because the kaleidoscope wasn’t invented then. That present is most probably fake too.

Episode 2
When Pinocchio was a young boy, he was tasked in assassinating someone. After a bit of a struggle he kills him but his daughter witnessed it. Hesitating initially, Pinocchio eventually kills her. Now all grown up, he continues his assassination ways. He meets up with his uncle, Cristiano who wants to send him to Montalcino to work with a few people in a new big mission. Later Cristiano talks to a few other guys to plan halting the construction of the Strait of Messina Bridge. Cristiano is drawing up plans to bomb it and will have Franca and Franco part of it. Franca and Franco meet up with Pinocchio. Franco knows his specialty is knives but still doesn’t trust him. He wants to test him as he pulls out a gun. Pinocchio is confident he can still take him down at this distance and use Franco’s old leg wound to his advantage. Still want to test him out? Pinocchio goes out shopping to make dinner. Aurora is a girl who is always following him and wants to help him out with whatever chores. This time Pinocchio tells her to stop following her around because she is annoying. Nothing good will come if she hangs around him because he is a naughty kid like Pinocchio. Franca tells Pinocchio about the job of blowing the bridge. As it is still under construction, there are only the pillar bases. If an amateur tries to blow it up, it wouldn’t take down a structure this size. Also, leaving jobs to other people will often get unnecessary people involved. Apparently Franca doesn’t consider herself like other terrorists. She only approves of necessary murder otherwise she is just an outlaw. Pinocchio feels sorry that her gentle ways in choosing who to kill will only be a hindrance. Just as Cristiano is everything to Pinocchio because he raised him, Franca is someone who gave Franco a goal. Good news we see Angelica alive and well recovering. But she still feels awkward with Marco. They will be heading to Milan for an operation soon.

Episode 3
Hilshire and Triela are tasked to head to Montalcino to look for a missing public safety member, Cohen who was on a mission looking for Pinocchio. They bribe the receptionist to book the same room Cohen stayed. They look around for clues as Triela spots a Pinocchio storybook in his suitcase and reads it. Aurora is outside Pinocchio’s place but nobody is in. Triela talks to her and learns indeed Pinocchio is renting this place. She drops a microphone in her basket. Triela returns to Hilshire and continue their stakeout across the place. Aurora lets herself into Pinocchio’s place. Nobody is in. She sees and picks up a gun on the table. Franca thinks she is one of those government’s assassins and tells her to drop it. She becomes scared as Franco disarms her. Aurora pleads to Pinocchio for help but he ties her up. Hilshire wants Triela to get ready and break in instead of waiting for back up and despite not knowing how many enemies are inside. Pinocchio is going to kill Aurora since she knows their identity. Franca disallows it. When Triela comes busting in, the guys split up to give her multiple targets. Eventually she and Pinocchio had a fist fight. He is faster than her and knocks her out! Pinocchio wanted to shoot Triela with her own gun but his past trauma prevented him so. Hilshire confronts Franca but she too gives him the slip. The trio ultimately slip away in their Alfa Romeo. Pinocchio realizes he dropped his pendant from Cristiano during the scuffle. Triela is awakened by Hilshire. Though he views everything as fine (Aurora is safe and they got away with minimal injuries – but Cohen’s body was found in the wine cellar), Triela is not happy that as a cyborg lost barehanded! She lost her cool. Hilshire sees the pendant and picks it up. Franca tells Pinocchio to forget about the pendant. No matter how memorable an item is, it can never replace the real thing. What is important is in the heart.

Episode 4
Bruno might look like a good husband and father but his job is disposing bodies of those killed under Cristiano’s orders. Since Marco and Angela will be on Pinocchio’s case, he drops by his old police department to meet an old friend to get some info. His hands are tied but he’ll try. Since Priscilla and Olga are here to watch over them, Marco might as well has them help him out. Marco wants Angelica to give her gun case to Priscilla and doesn’t want her to go into action. Because Marco is busting some punks’ ass in the alley for more information. Bruno sees Cristiano as they discuss about the government who has been illegally arresting them and then trying to pass a law to make their actions legal. At this rate, Italy will turn into a warzone. Cristiano hopes Bruno can meet with Pinocchio after his vacation. Marco continues his busting, this time taking down a few guys in a hideout. Angelica is acting strange. She grabs Priscilla’s wrist to the point she crushes it! It took Marco to snap her out of it. He realizes she needs her medicine. After he feeds her, he can’t understand why she is acting so as she has been taking the prescribed medication as instructed by the doctor. Priscilla hopes Marco won’t tell this to Jean because she thinks he’ll put Angelica back in hospital again. Later Olga tells Marco about Angelica’s strange behaviour. She believes he didn’t show her enough love. This is her first time in a while she is on a job so please show some consideration. The agency go into action to corner and take out Bruno. Luckily his car is bulletproof. For some dumb or desperate reason, his assistant winds down the window to fire back and gets shot. Could have stayed safe inside. Bruno crashes the car. The airbag saves him but he is unconscious. Rico is supposed to kill him but is interrupted by Angelica who happily tells her how Marco praised her for doing her best. Huh? The jobs not over, right?

Episode 5
Flashback shows after Marco got injured, he was discharged from the police force. His then girlfriend Patricia was very concerned although he seems optimistic about his new posting at the agency. She would have preferred the gentle him when he was on the force but he wanted to see how far he can go. Now, if it seems awkward that a dumb assassin tries to go up close and assassinate a politician and then got taken down himself, it is all just a plot set up to rile up and flush our those terrorist with some fake news. One month after the Milan incident, Angelica is still clumsy undergoing training. Marco still isn’t as kind as before since he believes the Angelica he knew was gone forever. Triela continues to fret about her loss to Pinocchio. Hilshire buys her a new gun till she can get her old one back. Patricia meets up with a reporter, Leonardo Conti. He tells her about the agency is actually an intelligence agency run by the government and that Marco is part of it. Patricia knows that. Not because Marco told her as she can tell since he always had to work hard every day for special operations. Thus it was probably that broke them up. Though, Patricia blames herself for hurting him. However Patricia doesn’t know the agency is using child assassins. Leonardo suggests teaming up to uncover the truth. They go round interviewing various people but it feels like their answers are all premeditated and the same. Leonardo is seen making a call to some guy about some kidnapping stint to draw a certain party’s attention. Leonardo and Patricia bust into supposedly a hideout of the agency. The place is empty. Leonardo is ambushed by Marco who is shocked to realize Leonardo knows a lot about him. Even more shock when he sees Patricia with him (so is she). He tells her to get away from him as he is part of the terrorist group. Leonardo then takes Patricia hostage and says he was just using her. Leonardo mocks Marco for conspiring with the government to commit crimes to the point of dumping his girlfriend. At a deadlock, Angelica busts in to take him down. Patricia wants answers but all Marco can tell her is to stay out of this. It’s not like he ended up this way because he wanted to.

Episode 6
Franca, Franco and Pinocchio take refuge at Franca’s winery currently being looked after by an old couple. Franca calls Cristiano to update about their situation. He tells her they are going to go ahead with the kidnapping job of Isabella D’Angelo who is the chairwoman for the Messina bridge project. He wants her to contact Nino Feretti since they know each other. Henrietta puts up a violin play for Isabella. She is amazed despite being a cyborg, she is still human-like. However she cannot accept that she is used to do the government’s dirty work. She is explained that the cybernetics technology used on her will help save many lives in the future and perhaps find a way to cure Isabella who is paralyzed from waist down. Rico was a bit rough on the kaleidoscope and a part breaks. This makes Henrietta mad. Jose takes it to repair in hopes the girls will reconcile. The repairman is no other than Nino. He assures he can fix it in 3 days. Jose tells Isabella that her life is being targeted. He sounds harsh telling her to turn her eyes away if she doesn’t want to see dirty things (the girls were preparing their guns before her). Isabella thought Jose is a scary person since he lost a loved one. Henrietta disagrees and calls him the kindest person ever because he sent her kaleidoscope to be fixed. Asking if Isabella hates terrorists. She once did a long time ago. Now she has lost her conviction. She thought of following her late husband’s will to complete the bridge but now isn’t sure if it is worth the blood it has shed. Jose and Rico apprehend Isabella’s bodyguard who is a sleeper terrorist. They will use him in a sting operation.

Nino is met by Franca. She wants his help to make bombs for the bridge despite hearing rumours he has quit. However he isn’t interested. Not even avenging his brother. Franca gives her contacts in case he changes his mind. When Nino and Leone are scouting Isabella’s movements, Nino recognizes Henrietta coming out. After receiving word that some of their men got arrested, Nino knows the risks are too high and wants them to pull out of this operation. Some of their men are disgruntled. Leone explains he knew Nino from university days. Along with his brother they used to make bombs and blow up anything but one day his brother got killed by the police and Nino became a coward ever since. They decide to go ahead with the operation without him. They thought they could kidnap an old paralyzed woman but Henrietta and the agency gun them all down! Franca meets Nino at the train station. He is leaving. She doesn’t like it but he believes she’ll understand one day. He asks her what she is fighting against. When will she be satisfied? Even if she has avenged her father, who must she kill until she has reached her goal? Better to consider this now while she has the time before she turns into an old dog like him who has lost the ability to run. Henrietta is happy the kaleidoscope is fixed but is told Nino has already quit.

Episode 7
Flashback shows Franca (whose real name is Caterina) was in the same university as Patricia but she decided to drop out to sue to country to free her father. She was also the one who hooked up Patricia with Marco. Her father was wrongfully imprisoned for crimes he did not commit and he died in prison. Instead of searching for the truth, she decided to go for revenge. She then went to find Franco (as told by her uncle Angelo Marinov) to learn making bombs but Franco was in depression since his grandpa who taught him how to make bombs just passed away. She was adamant to be his disciple despite he told her to be a nun if she wanted to change the world (and she slapped him). Franco then introduced Franca to Nino and his brother. It is then he gave her this Franca nickname. In present time, Franca is spotted by some agents. They recognize her as a wanted terrorist. So they stage a car breakdown and pregnant woman going in labour act to get her to stop. She is sharp enough to fight back but is overwhelmed. She is taken to their hideout where one of them beats the crap out of her. It is his revenge because one of her bombs gravely injured his pregnant wife who still has shrapnel inside her tummy and lost a few body parts. She tells him everyone carries their own grudge. Don’t think he is special because of his own issues. More beat down. Franco realizes the tracker on Franca has stopped for a while. Time to go save her. So they barge into the hideout with Pinocchio slicing his enemies and Franco giving ‘special treatment’ to Franca’s basher by pumping lots of lead into his body. Subsequently the authorities have to clean up this mess. A bomb trap was placed underneath one of the bodies. Had not Henrietta reacted swiftly, a lot would have died. Though, some agents and Triela got injured. Pinocchio is glad Cristiano is here but soon becomes sad since he wants to see Franca. Even more frowning when Cristiano learns he hesitated to kill on a recent job. That means an assassin is already at the end of his job. However Cristiano puts back some smiles when he commends him for saving Franca.

Episode 8
Because Claes don’t get much screen time, this episode is dedicated to see her daily life. She wakes up crying after dreaming about her times with Raballo. She has been reading books about minerals so she is somewhat quite interested with some meteorite stone. Not sure if the girls have to buy their own food because at the cafeteria, Beatrice is looking hungry. Claes could offer her food but she’ll make her work for it. And that’s helping with her garden. Then she goes for her usual lab experiment. Because she has also read about Scarborough Fair, she ponders its lyrics’ meaning. Be prepared to be spammed hearing this song throughout this episode. Not a bad thing, though. Heck, Claes even plays this on the piano. Then Jean takes her to watch some nature documentary. She asks if one cannot cry even when sad. That’s how she is feeling now. She can’t cry watching this show but yet she shed tears while sleeping without knowing it. Claes then visits the shooting range and watch some practice there. Then she goes join Priscilla and Angelica on the former’s Vespa. I guess they’re small enough to fit all 3 of them. At night, Claes draws a painting as she ponders more about Scarborough Fair’s lyrics. Next day, she continues her gardening. She finds an odd mineral in the soil. Beatrice doesn’t understand why Claes finds doing this fun. She doesn’t even understand the concept of fun. She feels nothing. So how can Claes feel fun? She believes someone taught her a long time ago.

Episode 9
Many years ago when Jose was going to leave to join the military police, his younger sister, Enrica didn’t want to be left alone. Although their parents and Jean will be around, she didn’t really like them because they were always too busy about work and never cared for her. She too wanted to join the military police to be with him but he told her it is better she became a harpist. Jose goes to see an old friend from the military police, Marcantonio. They talk about the old days like how Jose and Jean quit over some incident and the broadcast went crazy about it. A car bomb outside rocks the place but aside from the initial shock, everything else is okay. Jean and Rico then track and hunt down the bomber. They force him to bring them to his hideout where they discover high grade military bombs. Somebody must be smuggling them out. Because he won’t talk further. Jean gives Rico permission to beat the crap out of him till he talks! Jean learns from his superior that Colonel Ganny, commander of the Morize commissariat might be smuggling those bombs out. It isn’t mere coincidence the terrorists are very well equipped recently. If only there is proof of that, the agency will mark him for assassination. Jose talks to Bianchi about all he ever does for Henrietta is talk about myths and stars. Presents he gave are out of obligation. It feels empty. Bianchi doesn’t think it is a bad thing since that child needs to be loved. It reminds Jose of Enrica’s case of loneliness. The agency set traps to ambush a military truck suspected of smuggling. When they fail to surrender as warned, they go all out and shoot back. Man, the girls really riddled the truck with holes! Overkill! Jose is shocked and sickened to see the driver is Marcantonio. Later it is discovered that Marcantonio has been smuggling weapons from Ganny. They now have permission to assassinate him. So what it looked like Jose and Jean being good Handlers dressing up their girls so they can enjoy the opera, they are actually on the job to assassinate Ganny and his subordinate who are also watching the opera which is also about revenge and murder. Italians love tragedies, they say? The mission is successful. Too bad the girls didn’t get to see much of the opera, though.

Episode 10
Flashback shows Victor Hartmann (Hilshire’s real name) wanted to do field work in Europol as he wanted to stop child trafficking. However his boss refused him and showed him a snuff movie. Movies that murder people for entertainment. While many are fake, some are real and it involved kidnapped children. He became disillusioned at how evil the world is. Similarly, Rachelle Belleut a doctor who is sick of seeing children corpses teamed up with Hartmann to take matters into their own hands. Triela isn’t pleased that she needs to babysit Mario’s daughter, Mimi. Seems she wants to do more training and her loss to Pinocchio has hit her hard. Eventually she can’t disobey orders and with other agents, they watch over her (it’s like she’s under house arrest) while Mario gives his testimony at a trial in Naples. Triela and Mimi get acquainted with the latter asking if she likes Hilshire. Shock at first, Triela dismisses of anything like that since they can’t have such a relationship. Hilshire visits Mario. The trial is going well and is expected to end without a hitch. When it ends, Mario plans to escape overseas. More flashback when Hartmann and Rachelle stormed into an Amsterdam trafficking. In a gunfight, Rachelle was seriously wounded. They stumbled upon a child victim, Triela. It made Hartmann sick but Rachelle refused to give up and did CPR on her. When Triela revived, Rachelle died. It’s like they transferred life force? Triela is in a training with some army commando who is Hilshire’s acquaintance. Because she is still bitter about her loss to Pinocchio, she can’t concentrate and gets easily beaten up. He promises to turn her into an unbeatable warrior in 2 weeks. Triela then undergoes her usual maintenance but this time will receive a new leg implant. It is 100% effective thanks to the experiments done on Claes. During the operation, Triela is seen to shed tears. When she wakes up, she tells how she dreamt of her mom. The way she describes her seems so much like Rachelle.

Episode 11
When Cristiano was still a hitman, he and his best henchman, John wiped out an entire family perfectly as ordered. Cristiano stumbled upon a hidden cellar in which a child was locked up there. He decided to adopt him. It has been a few months and Pinocchio has gotten used to being a grape farmer. If life was only this peaceful till the end. Pinocchio talks to Franco about getting used to this life because it dulls his skills. He then goes on to explain his story how John was his teacher and taught him assassination techniques. He loves drinking and was believed to be an ex-CIA operative. However one day he just suddenly died from a stray bullet. Pinocchio views Franca and Franco as good people and it would be a waste if they died like John. Franca gets a call from her uncle to update her that Cristiano has lost his position. Thanks to the halt in supply of bombs and the failed kidnapping, the higher ups wanted somebody to take the fall. He advises her if she still wants to continue what she is doing, cut ties with him. Talking to Franco, he knows they could be at a disadvantage if Cristiano goes missing because the Milan group will then cooperate with the government to hunt him down. But there is a way to reinstate Cristiano’s position. They need to blow up the bridge as soon as possible. Although it is still at an early stage, with the stock they have, it is enough to do some damage. Information gets leaked to the agency about Cristiano and the Fratello is mobilized. Franca and the men drive to the bridge. It is heavily guarded and the Fratello teams are there. Flashback shows Cristiano didn’t like the idea John taught him assassination skills. John thought he had a natural talent for it. He did it on a whim and Cristiano can’t be one to say since he adopted him on a whim too.

Episode 12
Henrietta spots something off at the base of the bridge. Franca and Franco are boring holes and planting their bomb supplies. She shoots at them but Pinocchio attacks her. He sticks a knife in her shoulder. Nothing happens. Though, I suppose she can’t shoot straight at him since he escapes with Franca and Franco via boat. Franco gets shot in the shoulder. Then he activates the bomb. It didn’t do any damage to the bridge although it gave out quite a lot of smoke. On the way back to the vineyard, Pinocchio apologizes to Franco for hesitating to shoot. He explains when he first killed, there was a girl who looked like Henrietta. He killed her. It made him scared to point a gun at a girl. They decide to tell him about Cristiano’s case so the early next morning, Pinocchio leaves for his uncle. Triela visits the house where she fought Pinocchio and lost. Why do this to yourself if you’re only going to have bitter memories? Cristiano is surprised Pinocchio is here. He heard Cristiano will be arrested by the police and wants him to leave. But Cristiano doesn’t intend to and wants Pinocchio to escape. Pinocchio is willing to fight here and die for him. He owes his life to him for saving him from that cellar and gave him a name. Since Cristiano remains stubborn, Pinocchio threatens to kill everyone here! WTF?! The Fratello begin their operation to take in Cristiano and kill everyone else. They barge into the place and gun down everyone. No chance to even let them fight back! Triela gets her rematch with Pinocchio when they come face to face.

Episode 13
As their fight gets underway, when Pinocchio hears Triela telling Hilshire to go find Cristiano, he ditches the fight to find his uncle. He finds his uncle and is appalled he still hasn’t left. Cristiano tells him that he has decided. He will hide for a while so Pinocchio should escape too. The mind boggling thing was why didn’t they go together? Because of that, Pinocchio returns to his fight with Triela and Cristiano tries to get away with his butler but he was killed by Rico. Rico shoots at his shoulder before taking him away into their car. As she is loading him, she is run over by another car! Not sure if this is a joke if women are terrible drivers with Franca behind the wheel. After they load Cristiano, they make a dash for it. This is where it gets super silly. Jean informs Marco the target is heading their way. So Marco has Angelica snipe them. She got a few bullets into Franca (although not her vitals) but Franca steps on the pedal and I don’t even know how the car ‘flew’ over them!!! Was there a ramp somewhere???!!! And they lose them???!!! Franca is fast passing out. You can’t take that corner at high speed. Off the rails. Off the cliff. Into the river. We return to the bloody and desperate dogfight between Triela and Pinocchio whereby anything now goes. He gets madder when he sees his pendant in her possession. He shoots her a few times with her own gun but she survives. But it’s her turn to be mad because of that. Is she going to lose again? In the end, they knock each other out. Or so it seems from this point of view. In the aftermath, Rico reports they ‘failed’ the mission. Cristiano’s mansion is searched all over but no evidence was found. They believed he deleted all and anticipated them to raid. Also, the car in the river, no bodies were found. Rico and Triela are heavily injured but not fatal. Triela sits next to Pinocchio’s dead body. She stabbed his heart with a broken knife. She finds comfort in Hilshire’s arms and hopes he would praise her for win. At what cost? The other girls also get their ‘praise’ from their Handlers.

Jean visits the grave of Sophia. He sees Fernando there but the latter isn’t happy Jean is here. He blames Jean for Sophia’s death in the sense that he didn’t avenge her. Jean apologizes but Fernando punches him. Jean notices his political affiliation with the opposition and warns him not to get involved. Fernando won’t listen. So what does Jean have anything to do with them? Jean was supposed to marry Sophia. After Fernando left, Jean calls Jose that he is acting strange and to tail him. Business as usual. This leads them to discover Fernando is trying to ambush a place that a terrorist is hiding out on his own. Luckily Marco busts him before the rest storm in to apprehend the terrorist for more details. Rico wakes up from a nightmare where Jean abandoned her when she became useless. Jean takes Rico to Venice for their next mission. He explains about the Republicans originally wanted to divide Italy into 5 parts: Milan in the North, Rome, Naples, Sardinia and Sicily. With the Milan faction trying to unite all north, there is a breakaway faction, the Venetian faction who wishes for autonomy. Arriving at Milan, they meet Alto Meyer who helps them out with some information. Night falls and they begin their mission. Rico does her usual, storming into some baddies’ place and killing all of them. They obtained easy data from their laptop about the organization. Seeing how calm they are and the bloody mess everywhere, Meyer is sick to his gut they can act normal after all this. Next day, Jean and Rico continue chasing and gunning down more terrorists. When Rico seems to get hit, she falls into the sea. Jean instantly dives into rescue her. During evening, Rico loves how beautiful the sunset is but for Jean, it always makes him sad.

Hilshire accompanies Henrietta and Rico on their vacation. They pass the Messina Bridge which is on schedule to be completed. Meanwhile Triela is depressed? After defeating Pinocchio, what else is left of her existence? Or maybe she didn’t get to be with Hilshire this time. Henrietta and Rico return to their respective Handlers once the trip is over. Jose gives Henrietta a nice dress to wear. When Jean sees it, he is in shock. Let me guess. It belongs to Enrica, right? Flashback shows Jean was about to leave for Rome for training but Enrica didn’t want him to go because of the promise they along with Jose to go on a boat ride. Too bad his training is more important than sister time. Then it gets creepy because while Jean is reminiscing about his past, the ghost of Enrica haunts him! OMG! Is this turning supernatural now?! I want to say Jean is seeing things but ghost girl did mention that she died. She blames Jean for being the bad brother while comparing to angelic Jose. Jean never thinks about her except avenging Sophia. However she now feels Jose is being cruel for giving her dress to another girl. She wonders if he has found someone to replace her. Jean ‘agrees’ because this is his way of always thinking of her. Had he not done that, he couldn’t have lived what would have transpired then. If she wants to hate somebody, hate him. Jean is snapped out when Rico calls him since she finds it odd he is like talking to somebody but nobody’s there. Next day, Jean tells Jose about that ghastly incident. Was it a ghost or a dream? He asks if Jose still remembers that boat promise. Of course. Jean hopes they could do it later with Henrietta and Rico. Can this be simply atoned like that?

Sending Girls To Do A Man’s Job
Oh dear… What a boring end to the series that started out as something interesting. Forgive me if you are going to hear a lot of comparison between both seasons because they are very different to each other in almost every aspect. So different that if you have watched the first season and have gotten somewhat used to its style, you will be in total shock to see the total change and revamp in Il Teatrino. Yes, very different. Although Il Teatrino didn’t match up to the first season, it still was passable. Barely. However the couple of OVAs really killed it. It was unnecessary and did nothing much to develop anything except bring forth more questions like what happened to Franca and Franco. Because if they have been simply killed off, that would have ended there as it is but now they are missing. So? Possible clash in the future. Too bad there aren’t any more seasons. And what is with this Enrica thingy in the end? It is not like it resolved anything. It’s like they had no more ideas for the OVAs and inserted something so random just to milk our moneys out of the BDs. But that’s not the point.

The first thing I will compare is the main story of both seasons. In the first season, we are mainly concentrated on the main girls of the Fratello. We see their past and flashback as well as how they currently cope with their current Handlers. Although the bulk is on Henrietta and Jose, the rest have their bit of fair share of screen time. Thus many of the episodes in between feel like standalone fillers and does not have a real proper plot. Come the second season, there now seems to be a ‘plot’. Although this ‘plot’ seems to be dragging out too long because if you think about it, it’s just mainly about the agency trying to track down Pinocchio’s team and preventing the bombing of a bridge. So much so this dragging out that they had to insert some fillers, detours and flashbacks halfway through the season before ending it all.

The next and perhaps the most shocking difference is the characters. One can obviously tell how ‘lively’ the girls are in Il Teatrino compared to the original. In the first season, the girls were like lifeless robots. Even if they show a bit of emotion or smile a little bit, it looked fake and sometimes forced. This is not a bad thing given the situation and setting of the story. It is a rather gloomy and grim world they are in after all. Then when Il Teatrino arrives, all of a sudden they are so lively! OMG! It’s like the doctors tweaked them to be livelier than ever. Take for instance Rico. I remember she was the taciturn sniper at first. But in the sequel, she is totally an active kid!!! WTF?! I noticed that when Henrietta or Rico answers or acknowledges their respective Handler, they have this boring and monotonous robotic tone to it. But now they have this lively feel in their voice like as though they are happy and looking forward to do their bidding!

Given that Henrietta had more focus in the first season, I suppose they try to give Triela a little more in Il Teatrino. Thus the reason why I felt why Triela had more presence in Il Teatrino due to her ‘grudge’ with Pinocchio than Henrietta especially towards the end since Henrietta was on ‘vacation’. Then it is Rico’s turn for the short OVAs albeit nothing really deep about her. I don’t know. It just feels so odd seeing the girls as cold killing machines during the mission but during off missions, they are like little sisters with brother complex trying to seek their Handler’s attention and blush each time they get praised or having something nice done to them (Henrietta and Angelica are the main offenders). Like as though everyone should have just retire and play house for the rest of their lives. You like little girls? Sure, pick one and ‘groom’ her the way you like. Spend more time with her. Treat her nice and good. She’ll love you back. Just mind a few cybernetic parts. If only reality was that easy.

Even their Handlers feel different. The most drastic one is Hilshire. I remember this dude as a taciturn guy who doesn’t show much of his emotions. But in Il Teatrino he is like more open and showing obvious concern for Triela. It’s really a big change. Even Jose who seems like he is ‘forcefully’ trying to be nice to Henrietta in the first season, in Il Teatrino he feels like her big brother! I think it is a bit annoying that in the second season whenever we get the chance to see Henrietta being treated nicely by Jose or something nice happens to them, you can see her nice little girl smile and relief like as though she’s a dog getting her reward. So while it seems more and more like Jose is genuinely getting used to treating Henrietta nice, it could hint that he might have been trying to use her as Enrica’s replacement. Either he has gotten over her or sees Enrica in Henrietta but calls her by a different name so as not to evoke whatever that painful incident. Like as though trying to make amends by spending time with the little sister that should have been. And Jean seems like a no nonsense guy with no emotions dedicated to his job. So they try to give him some guilt trip with Enrica just to show something. Something. Whatever that is. And since when did Marco sound more like a talkative young uncle?

The rest of the supporting casts don’t really matter because they’ll either be relegated to the background which is unimportant or if they are the bad guys, there is a high chance that they will be assassinated. Yeah, saves so much money and time compared to sending them to prison and awaiting trial because you have got to feed and house them and the likes. Whoops… Also, it saves brain power to think whatever happened to them. Unlike Franco and Franca… Just kill them off. Hence for the rest of the members at the agency, they aren’t really memorable. If so, perhaps for weird reasons like Priscilla who seems to be a lolicon (though not very obviously) and it is only okay because she is a woman. If she was a guy, imagine the backlash… Even a few other girls at the agency aren’t that memorable. I read there were a few that appeared in the manga but made only a small cameo in the anime. So like Beatrice, her brief introduction, a few missions here and there before being totally forgotten, I now only remember her as Claes’ garden lackey… Somebody should feed this girl enough. But really, lots of characters in this series do come and go. You hear them in one episode and then never to appear or be heard of again. Mostly getting killed off.

The most jarring and obvious difference that you will notice if you start watching Il Teatrino is the art style and visual. No doubt that both seasons are animated by different studios with the first season being animated by Madhouse (Death Note, One Punch Man, Black Lagoon) and the second by Artland (Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn, Senran Kagura, Mushishi). As we have gotten used to the first season’s style, Il Teatrino comes as a big shocker. The first season was so dull and gloomy in its colour that you could actually feel that the whole atmosphere was just dreary. It really fits the theme and mood of the series. Then comes Il Teatrino and it makes you go, “Why the heck is everything so much more colourful?!”. In fact, everything is so much brighter that it doesn’t reflect the grim assassination world that the girls live in. I have a hunch that it is supposed to match the ‘lively’ characters because had either one aspect be dull and the other be lively, it would be so contrasting that it would be confusing.

Heck, even the characters are looking a bit slightly different. They look so much more like your anime character. Okay, I might sound a bit confusing here but in the first season with the characters looking lacklustre and lifeless, suddenly they have this anime-like ‘life’ infused into their looks. Get what I mean? Okay, let me give you an example. Jose might not look like a typical Italian and a Japanese big brother in the first season, but in the second season, he looks even more like a Japanese big brother than ever. Get it? Okay, how about this. Henrietta looks more like an anime girl in Il Teatrino than in the first. Because the first season, the characters’ eyes are so lifeless and like zombies unlike in the second. Yes, the girls had those dead eyes and it really gives an impact when they respond even with emotions, they still feel lifeless. Though, I think the girls in the first season looks a bit ‘fat’. At least their faces. In conclusion, having such a lively and bright art style and colour doesn’t really suit and fit well to what it was already established. Besides, doesn’t the second season poor animation quality feel like it sucks?

Another major overhaul is the voice acting. In fact, the entire main and supporting casts are replaced in Il Teatrino. It is no wonder why the usual girls and their Handlers sound so off and different. And so much livelier. It really makes them out of their character from the ones we are used to from the first. I wanted to note how happy I was hearing Mamiko Noto’s voice as Elsa even if she was just cameo. And then… The horror… THEY KILLED OFF HER CHARACTER!!! OMFG!!! DID THIS ‘CURSE’ EVEN GO BACK AS FAR AS THIS ANIME???!!! WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE???!!! That was my true despair… Then like as though to make it up for my despair, they reinstated Mamiko Noto not as Elsa but as Patricia. They tried to troll me when they took her character as hostage because I really thought her Patricia character was going to die too. Phew… I believe Mamiko Noto is the only cast from the original season to be somewhat recalled for another role in the second. I forgive you for making such amends (even if it’s not intended).

The opening theme for the first season, The Light Before We Land by The Delgados is strange by itself. Totally sung in English, this slow rock has its overall pace remind me of The Beatles’ A Day In Life. The weird slow lazy-cum-dreamy voice the singer sings and drags her voice somewhat reminds me of John Lennon singing that song too. Even the way the electric guitar is played strikes a familiar chord. Even though this song is strange, at least it beats Il Teatrino’s opener, Tatta Hitotsu No Omoi by Kokia. Too much like anime pop that it doesn’t fit with the theme of the series. At least the first season’s ending theme, Dopo Il Sogno by Opus has this Italian soprano lady singing this dramatic and tragically- sounding piece. Not bad actually. Il Teatrino’s main ending theme, Doll by Lia is a slow ballad although I somehow feel this song is much suited for an anime produced by Key like Air, Kanon and Clannad. Seriously. There is also a version sung by Aoi Tada but they sound so close that I couldn’t hear the difference. She also sings a special ending theme, Scarborough Fair. The special ending for Il Teatrino’s final episode is also very Air-like too, Human by Lia.

The action bits are not the series’ strong point nor is it its main focus. What it does is just to complement and show us the gruesome things the girls have to put up. So expect lots of bullet holes and dead bodies to pile up. As I have mentioned in the poor animation style in Il Teatrino, hence some of the action scenes feel a bit cartoonish and poor quality. Thus the grimmer and darker first season has better looking gunfights that complement the overall mood.

Instead of sending in the army, they should just send these girls to do the job in taking out a dictator ruling his country with an iron fist or the drug cartel running their huge fields of marijuana. And if the world complains about them, I guess the girls can be sent to silence them either. No difference than being the villains themselves. So it goes to show how controversial the use of such young girls can be and how deadly it would be if they fall into the wrong hands.

Overall, the first season has set the pace and tone of the series and only for the second one to someone diminish and ruin the enjoyment. Not to say that Il Teatrino sucks but it sure could have done better than what has been seen. Like as though it downgraded itself and made it worse. Thanks a bunch, OVAs. But the thought of giving young girls a second chance in life but doing dirty jobs is something that will make you think hard if such life is worth living or they would be better off left for dead in the first place. Whatever your stance or standards, at least these girls have a chance in life no matter how small or minute it is. That is all that they need. Oh, and lots of love too. Because aside from all the cybernetic implants and enhancements, they still have the heart and soul of a human. And the irony is that it makes them more human than us who are completely of flesh and blood. Maybe it is that imperfection that makes us human.

Ansatsu Kyoushitsu S2

May 13, 2017

Because the manga has already ended, it is only right that the sequel for Ansatsu Kyoushitsu also ends and gives the series its due closure. This means answering some of the burning questions we have from the previous season like Koro’s origins and the truth behind it all once and for all. With pending doom of mankind at stake, it is a race to see if they can get the monster first or will the monster get humanity first. And if we’re just talking about killing Koro, who will win the race to claim his life? His own students or some other outside party. The past year of doing and overcoming the impossible has all boiled down to this moment. The moment of truth. Year 2016 isn’t such a bad sh*t as everyone thinks it to be when you compare this to the countdown to the end of the world.

Episode 1
Continuing off from last season where class 3-E are on the Okinawa resort for special training but ran into that Takaoka problem (and solved it), Koro wants to push ahead with the test of courage since he hasn’t experienced it yet. He is quite enthusiastic about it (because he wants to play matchmaking) but not his students. Koro plays the ghost but he doesn’t scare them but instead he got scared by some of them! Koro is most disappointed by the end of it. However everyone notices Bitch clinging on to Karasuma. Everyone suddenly has this devilish idea… You bet they’re going to hook Bitch up with Karasuma. But first they need to know Karasuma’s taste before they can proceed. I don’t think anybody knows… Eventually they setup a nice romantic candle lit dinner on the beach. Karasuma can talk nothing except the students’ progression and how at this rate they can kill Koro. It gets sombre really quickly as Bitch asks if he knows what it really means to kill. She kisses her napkin and puts in on Karasuma’s lips. A cool “I love you” before leaving. But in her heart, Bitch must be rueing how pathetic that move was. Karasuma thought she was practising some sort of new killing technique. Koro accompanies his students to the fireworks festival. I’m sure they want to have fun but some have to be cut short because like Chiba and Hayami, they rule the shooting gallery and won everything and had to be banned. In fact, everyone is so good they are making a killing winning all the prizes. They make it look so easy. Koro has no money and has to take up several jobs selling food at the stalls. No problem at that lightning speed. Karasuma attends a government meeting. In addition to the reward 10 billion Yen reward, a successful group assassination will yield 30 billion.

Episode 2
Kaede has this grand idea of using discarded eggs to assassinate Koro. She noticed his weakness that he loves pudding and laments he could eat more. Therefore she has researched a lot in making a giant pudding. Of course inside the pudding there will be those harmful materials in which they will detonate when the time is right. The entire class put in their herculean effort to make this giant pudding. Koro is absolutely please and digs in. Halfway through, suddenly Kaede feels she can’t blow it up. She put in so much effort, it will be a waste to destroy it! Attachment? Of course Koro already picked up and disable the bomb because he smelled plastic explosives. The rest of the pudding isn’t wasted as Koro uses it to make pudding for them. Hey wait. Aren’t those using expired eggs? The students are in a special cops and robbers training. In a limited time, Karasuma has to catch them and put them in ‘prison’ where Koro is the warden. Karasuma is quick and deadly. However thanks to Koro receiving bribes, he turns a blind eye and lets the ‘prisoners’ go. In the end, all of Karasuma’s hard work were for naught. When rumours that a panty thief is striking homes, everyone suspects Koro! I mean, who could steal panties at such speed? Who could have had such perverted fetish? Damn right. It gets even worse when Koro tries to prove his innocence because his entire belongings seem to have lingerie?! Did he really steal them? Yeah, he has even got a record of boob size for all the girls. Kaede is forever flat?! Of course the students wonder if Koro really did this. What would he gain from ruining his reputation? Could it be an imposter? As calculated, they think the panty thief will strike at this big busted idol group renting a place here for their dance practice. Then the real culprit turns up. Obviously not Koro. Just someone in a yellow helmet. Immediately Koro apprehends him. He unmasks him and realizes he is one of the Karasuma’s subordinates. During the confusion, a cage covered with harmful material falls around Koro. This is a trap by Shiro as he has learnt from what his students tried on the island. Swiftly attacking Koro from the top is Itona.

Episode 3
Despite Itona spamming his tentacle attacks, Koro is not fazed by one bit. Instead, he has memorized his attack patterns and knows how he strikes. Koro has also levelled up himself and uses some burst of energy from his tentacles to defeat Itona. Itona’s head hurts because the tentacles are gnawing away his mind from repeated defeats. At this rate he will go crazy and die within a few days. Shiro then abandons Itona seeing he has failed and they need to cut their losses. Itona then runs off and in his madness, attacks handphone shops. When Koro and his students find him, they try to calm him down but Itona is still bent on becoming the strongest and defeat Koro. Suddenly smoke screen is released. Another trap by Shiro. He knows Koro will take responsibility over Itona since he is now his student. Therefore Shiro kidnaps Itona. Then his team tries to target and hurt Itona. It works well since Koro is trying to protect him and bears the brunt of the assault. Luckily the 3-E students get rid of the henchmen. Koro warns Shiro to step down and realize he has lost. Shiro admits he lost this time and will be back after making radical changes to his plans. The problem is now Itona since he is still going crazy. Ritsu has researched about his past. His parents had a factory that supplied smartphones to the world. But 2 years ago, they went bankrupt and missing, leaving Itona behind. It is a reason Itona lusts for power and victory. Noting he is just a delinquent, Terasaka and his groupie take responsibility to solve this. To cheer him up, they let him eat Takuya Muramatsu’s disgusting ramen, ride Taisei Yoshida’s horrible bike on his family’s track and Kirara Hazama trying to convince to read the entire 7 volumes of The Count of Monte Cristo for revenge motivation! Since Itona is still hell bent on revenge, Terasaka shuts him up and relates that he used to think like him. He should get rid of that impossible vision right away. Don’t let a few losses throw you off course. Because it doesn’t have to be now to kill Koro. As long as it is by next March, they can take their time and win by them. With Itona calming down and giving up on that goal, Koro is able to detach the tentacles from his head. Officially Itona is now in Koro’s class and naturally he is under Terasaka’s delinquent group of idiots.

Episode 4
Itona is making an RC tank in his bid to kill Koro. It is silent and deadly. With the guys interested in this idea, it soon dawned to them that they can use this for another sleazy purpose… Watching up girls’ skirt… Yeah… And so most of them chip in to make improvements to the mini tank whenever it runs into trouble and cover its shortfall. Oh, how far did the assassination goal steer away. But Nagisa has noticed Itona has no trouble fitting in nicely with the guys. And then the girls find out and the guys busted. Yeah, everybody just blames Okajima. Even Itona. Poor guy being made the scapegoat… Everyone is surprised to learn Masayoshi Kimura’s first name is supposed to be pronounced as Justice (his parents are cops). This leads to a debate with some of them opining if they like or dislike their given name. It is suggested they give each other code names and call each other that for the day. Despite being written and randomly assigned, it feels more than just coincidence that they get a nickname associating with what they mainly describes them. Wanna guess who is Forever Flat? How about Baseball Brain? Who is Tsundere Sniper? Box Of Moe? Bilingual Blonde? President Poverty? I bet is better than Crassanova. They play a game of tag in which the students have to take down Karasuma. With teamwork, they manage to get him. At the end of the day, only Kimura wonders why he is the only one using his real Justice name. Koro explains about how cool his name will sound when the media needs a tagline to report how a hero saves the world. Names that parents give might not hold any great meaning but it is the meaningful things they do that makes their names great. A cue for Koro to want his class to call him The Eternal Prince Of Tempestuous Desires. Everyone protests and calls him The Pervy Octopus Of Spineless Stupidity.

Episode 5
Nagisa and co visit the café where Isogai works part time and note how cool he is in everything! Is he using his poor status to his advantage? Nevertheless he is cool. However Gakushuu and his friends find out. It is against school rules to work. Isogai pleads to give just a month to get the necessary money but Gakushuu gives him a condition. If they can beat them in a pole toppling match, he’ll disregard this. At first Isogai wants to go this alone since this is his responsibility but we all have to be reminded of Class 3-E’s teamwork. During the game, it seems Class 3-E opts for minimal participants. Only the guys participate. Gakushuu’s side has got even burly American friends? Class 3-E seems like they are going to only defend their pole. The Americans push aside a couple of them and try to topple their pole but their tight defence pays off. When Gakushuu sends his flanking team, Isogai leads a few boys into the middle of the field and gets surrounded. And then they rush off into the spectator stands and it now becomes a chaotic cat and mouse game. Because of their focus on this, Gakushuu didn’t see those couple of them sneaking up from behind and trying to hold him down. Now all Class 3-E boys charge towards Gakushuu’s pole and trying to bring it down. Gakushuu can still fight them off while defending his pole. But the ultimate difference in them is that Gakushuu makes decisions all by himself (so his underlings cannot act without him giving orders) unlike Isogai doesn’t have to make all the decisions himself. He sends in Itona as the secret weapon to tip and topple the pole. Class 3-E wins. With this shocking loss again, it is no surprise they’re going to get their punishment from Asano. First he tells them they already loss the intelligence battle because Class 3-E won the match despite the battle was stacked heavily against them. Then he does a bloody karate lesson on his son and his American friends. Finally, a lesson in life. Asano once lost to a karate master. That frustration led him to master the art for if he failed and humiliate himself again, he would lose himself and die of madness. He then defeated the karate master in a single hit. The question is why Gakushuu’s sense of frustration isn’t eating him alive. Gakushuu keeps his word to not rat on Isogai but he will get him and the entire class next time.

Episode 6
Class 3-E is hopping around from roof to roof. I guess they’ve trained enough to do superhuman abilities. But then they crash into an old man riding his bicycle. He fractured some bones and will be hospitalized for 2 weeks. Because the kids are top secret, Karasuma is negotiating compensation to keep this incident a secret. You can tell Koro is most upset and slaps everyone when they try to give excuses. He tells them off being drunk with their powers makes them no different than the main campus. No answer for that. The old guy is a stubborn goat and won’t accept just any compensation. After Koro sincerely apologizes on their behalf, his students will now have to work without pay at the preschool that he is a principal of. You can tell Sakura is the resident brat and is going to make their life hell. Don’t worry. Nothing untoward happens. She confides with Nagisa and it looks like she is some bully victim too and does badly in her tests. But some little advice from Nagisa to sometimes look back down gives her some hope. Don’t tell me this kid has fallen for him. Two weeks later, the old guy is released. He is not going to expect anything. Wait till he sees his entire preschool building remodelled and expanded in a green way. Even his bicycle is given an eco makeover! Yeah, it’s creepy to think kids their age can do all this perfectly. But what about the relationship with his students? It all means nought if they cannot win their hearts. Well, Sakura has took up Nagisa’s advice and is doing well in her tests. She wants him to continue as her teacher. Hint, hint. Despite their stint is over, Class 3-E has mid-terms tomorrow. Of course they flopped seeing they couldn’t study during that time and are kicked out from top spots. This only gives Gakushuu and his friends ammo to taunt them. However Karma is the only one who studied and took overall 2nd place just behind Gakushuu. He shuts them up that his pals were just giving them space because it would be just bad for them to lose all the time. The class apologizes to Karasuma and also learnt an important lesson to use their powers to help and protect. Then they all demonstrate before Koro the new protective outfits from the government to show him they will use their lessons they learn from him with assassination.

Episode 7
The class realizes Bitch’s birthday was a few days ago. While half of them keep her company (she feels great for being popular), the rest buy a bouquet of roses from a florist. They want Karasuma to hand it to her without revealing where this bouquet came from. He agrees when Karma puts it as winning her over as part of his job. Bitch is totally happy when she receives the flowers. But when he starts talking about the job and end of the world, she realizes that she has been setup by the kids. She was a fool to think Karasuma would do something like this on his own. The class thinks Karasuma is still dense but on the contrary he knows about Bitch’s feelings. If her blade can be dulled by romance, she is not qualified for work and will hire another assassin. For 3 days, Bitch has never come to class. Has she quit? Then the florist waltzes in. He is actually an assassin nicknamed Reaper. He shows Bitch captured and wants them to come to a specific location or he’ll cut up and send her parts to them equally. The kids have no choice but to do this without alerting the other teachers as they realize this is probably another guy who is trying to take advantage of them to draw out Koro. They enter some bunker which turns out to be a big prison. But they’re not going to just sit there and wait. They bust out but the true nightmare starts. Uhm, Reaper is like a shadow? He is on a different level than them and quickly owns them. Not even Nagisa had the time to react. Half of the other class went to look and rescue Bitch. When they cut her free, she immediately tranquilizes them. She is in cohorts with Reaper and sure fooled them. Itona is the last one left standing and he makes the wise decision to surrender because he knows they cannot beat them. After all, he has learnt that today is one of those days they can lose. Reaper puts them in a cell. He is surprised Karasuma has tracked them. Thanks to Koro acting like a dog…

Episode 8
Bitch acts like Reaper’s hostage to let their guard down. This allows Koro to fall into a trap and put in the same cell as his students. Oh, the cell is laced with those dangerous materials. Don’t lick your way out… Also, everyone has got a bomb in their collar that will explode if Reaper activates it. Reaper plans to flood this entire canal but he needs to activate it at the command room above. Karasuma will not allow this and places the safety of his students higher than the world’s destruction. He is going to fight Reaper but he flees. While Karasuma tries to disable the traps he set along the way, Bitch moves in to kill Karasuma. She knows the risk as an assassin and is prepared to die. Oh really? Because she sure hell didn’t know Reaper plans to sacrifice her when he explodes the ceiling. While Karasuma is safe, she is pinned under a rubble. Naturally Karasuma wants to go after Reaper since Bitch has defected but the students plead to safe her. Everybody makes mistakes, right? Well, may I remind you that you have only one chance to save Earth? Anyway, while we see Bitch’s tragic past that made her decide to go into the assassinating world, Reaper detonates the collar bomb but it seems the students have easily taken it off and are hiding behind the camera’s blind spot. When Reaper goes back to Bitch and telling her about the world is about deceive or being deceived, you know karma is a b*tch when he gets what is coming. Bitch plays him out to deceive him so Karasuma could take on him in melee combat. Reaper’s horrifying truth is exposed: He has no face! What a way to improve on his disguising skills? Reaper thought he won when he shoots a mini hole in Karasuma’s veins that will make him bleed to death. He didn’t know Koro elongated his tentacle to block the shot. He is then kicked in the nuts! Ouch! Well, he is human after all. In the aftermath, Bitch expects to be sexually abused by everyone (or does she really want it?) but everyone wants her to just come to class. Karasuma gives a rose he took from Reaper to her. Even if it is just one, I guess she’s happy. But so sorry, nothing racy happens after that. To stop the students being used in future assassinations, Koro wants a safe environment for killings. WTF?! Isn’t that contradicting? Karasuma talks to the ministry about no pay out for the bounty if the students get injured and he agrees seeing they are done hiring freelance assassins. It will be their last assassination project with an international coalition.

Episode 9
Ironically if Koro is going to destroy the world, why would class 3-E need to have a career discussion? Of course Nagisa is still in a dilemma as he ponders if he should use his talents to become an assassin. Koro has him think again and if he truly wants to become one, he’ll support him. But that is the least of his problems. When he returns home, his mom has had enough of his ‘mediocre’ grades and wants him back in the main campus. Of course she is going to do that by giving a ‘generous donation’. But when Nagisa protests, mom goes into a rage. He should have known better to speak out when she is in a gloomy mood. Nothing he will say will convince her. We hear her rant about her failed live and thus living her dreams through Nagisa. Another reason why Nagisa looks so girly is that mom wanted a daughter. Mom has decided to go talk to his homeroom teacher tomorrow. Because Karasuma is officially listed and he is away, Koro will disguise as him. It sucks… After Koro hears her out, he asks if Nagisa wants it but mom tells him as a kid he doesn’t know anything. Koro then takes off his wig. This is to imply there are things Nagisa must decide himself because this is his life. Unless Nagisa wills it, Koro cannot allow his transfer. Mom blows her top (wow, like an earthquake happening) and leaves while vowing to prove them all wrong. That night during dinner, Nagisa is drugged out by mom. He wakes up outside the school grounds. She wants him to burn it down with his own hands so that he would feel ashamed to come back here. Nagisa won’t do it so she goes into that usual rant of the cost and time it took for her to raise her and blames it on this class for making her disobey her. But a whipping assassin is here and this makes mom scared. Nagisa easily uses his talent to knock him out. Nagisa is grateful mom raised him but wishes for her to be happy watching him grow up. Koro assures her son isn’t going to betray her. He is just getting ready to leave the nest like everyone. With all the tension gone, she faints. On the way back, Koro asks if Nagisa still wants to become an assassin. All Nagisa knows is that he wants to use his talents to protect the ones he loved. So that rules out being an assassin. From now on, Nagisa makes breakfast and will do the house chores to lighten his mom’s burden. He hopes she could let him stay in class 3-E. She might not look happy but telling him to do what he wants is a sign of approval.

Episode 10
Class 3-E will be selling acorn noodles for the cultural festival. Of course this is an indirect competition with Gakushuu’s class who is organizing a great party-cum-concert to crush their eternal rivals. Hey, Gakushuu jamming away… Focusing on Class 3-E, we’ve got the bullies from the school trip visiting. They want to say bad about their food but their reactions don’t lie. They’ll spend more when Bitch seduces them to. Remember that kid, Yuuji? The one who had a crush thinking Nagisa was a girl? He’s here too! Nakamura makes Nagisa wear a skirt to serve him. A ploy to milk some money out of this rich kid? Whose idea is it to ask Nagisa to date him for 10 grand?! But their ‘date’ is interrupted when lots of other weird characters like Lovro and Red Eye pop up. They freak the hell out of Yuuji but Nagisa lies they are some sort of comedians. Eventually Yuuji knows he is lying. His date often meets up with famous people and he can tell when a person puts up a fake smile. That is when Nagisa comes clean with everything including revealing himself as a boy (but short of revealing his manhood to prove it!). Sorry Yuuji. That wasn’t a lie. He leaves disappointed and Nagisa feels guilty for deceiving him. The next day, they see a long line to their store. It seems Yuuji is now a famous food blogger and he praises very high their menu. So we’ve got all sorts of normal people and weirdoes coming. Hey. Isn’t that guy from Saiki Kusuo No Psi Nan? Isn’t that guy from Kuroko’s Basket?! And isn’t that afro dude from Bobobo-Bo-Bo-Bobo???!!! Class 3-E could have kept going if not for Koro stopping them for the day. They are blessed to have such bounty and continuing would mean destroying the ecosystem. The last customer is Nagisa’s mom. She apologizes and has accepted him as his own person. She hopes he can stay with her for a little while. After all, she is his only mom. Although Gakushuu’s class comes up tops, Class 3-E takes 3rd place and this is already abuzz among the students in the main campus.

Episode 11
Gakushuu seems to be satisfied with his win over Class 3-E although his father would have preferred him to go further like food poisoning. When Gakushuu mentions about strength in defeat, Asano talks to his friends for 3 minutes alone. When Gakushuu returns, they have all become hating zombies for Class 3-E. Asano doesn’t believe he taught such fragile strength and will handle the final term exams. Asano knows that Koro’s assassination is moving to the next phase so he ‘blackmails’ the authority to send another billion into his account or he won’t guarantee the secrecy of this project. They have to since he is already so ‘kind’ in lending his school for this mission. Asano takes over teaching the top class. Teaching syllabus that is on par with college level? Everyone becomes a study zombie and those who slack a little gets a short talk and return as Class 3-E hating zombies. When Asano tells his son to go home and study since he is expected to take top spot, that’s the last straw. Class 3-E is surprised Gakushuu is requesting them to kill Asano. Not physically but his education policies. He prides in his school’s top students so if Class 3-E surpasses that, it will ruin his stance. They think he wants his father’s attention. Gakushuu explains the chilly relationship the father and son always had since the beginning. But he is worried of his methods turning his friends studying beyond their limit with only hatred for Class 3-E. In the future they will think this is the only way. Gakushuu might look down on his friends but if that happens, they won’t be able to support him. He is grateful for some of the defeats opened his eyes and hopes they can show his father a proper defeat. Class 3-E will take on the challenge like they’ve always do. They’ll try their best to win. Koro talks to Asano before the exams. Asano knows this is Koro’s first time as a teacher and since he never said why, he thought beating him would allow him to know. Koro says there are only 2 reasons why one teaches. Either they want to pass their success or warn of their failures. The exams get on the way. Class 3-E handles each subject like how they always approach. Then the final boss in terms of an unknown syllabus pops up. It seems only Karma is prepared to take this head on.

Episode 12
Gakushuu and Karma are the only ones who manage to reach the final tough ass question. Each has their own metamorphic vision and way to solve it. But it is only Karma who manages to ‘easily’ solve it while Gakushuu ran out of time and was just a line away from completion. In the end when the results come out, Karma takes top spot and Gakushuu second. But if Terasaka who is always dead last in Class 3-E ends up 46th overall, this means the other Class 3-E students made it into the top 50! The rest of the top 10 are occupied by Class 3-E. Time for a celebration. But it isn’t for the main campus. Although they did well in the first half of the questions, as the questions became more difficult, they started losing their composure. Vengeance can only get you so far and cramming everything last minute won’t do. Everyone is depressed and Gakushuu isn’t proud of his marks either. He hopes everyone can work together and they can find a way to win. But Asano interrupts and guarantees he will improve their mind-set. However everyone is clear that this method isn’t working and thinks defeat sometimes can help make them learn better. They are prepared to be dropped to End Class. When Gakushuu points out the class has spoken, Asano slaps him that he flies quite a distance! With that shock on his face, it is proof that his policies are failing. But he isn’t going to give up yet. Although Class 3-E have qualified to return to the main campus, they’re staying put. It’s more fun here, right? Suddenly an excavator tries to demolish their building. Asano will have them transfer to a new campus with facilities akin to a prison as culmination of his educational policies. He views them no longer useful to his policies and this is where he will kill Koro. A dismissal notice?! Of course he is going to give Koro and his class a chance to stay with this little game. There are 5 bombs. 4 of which will kill Koro and 1 will kill a human. He inserts them randomly into a page. Koro is to solve that problem on that page fast enough before it explodes. He will do 4 and Asano will do the final one. Koro wins if he can survive all that. This game might sound like it favours Asano. It is since the world is about injustice and the weak can only kill the strong via assassination. That is why he has trained them to be the strong ones. Koro picks a random book. However he panics in solving it and the bomb goes off. Asano knows his reaction and speed drops when he flusters and will never overcome this trap. 3 more to go. Asano plans to use the money from his assassination and with the backing of the ministries to teach the nation of his education policies and mechanisms.

Episode 13
However Koro is able to finish his remaining tasks in lightning speed. Although he memorized all textbooks in Japan, this one gave him a little problem because he lent it to one of his students for quite a while and couldn’t quite recall it instantly. Now it is Asano’s turn. He stares in disbelief like as though his plan has failed and only death awaits him. Time for flashback. He once started a cram school at this dilapidated building. With only 3 students to boot, he was a decent teacher. They graduated well and with his reputation increasing, other parents soon started sending their kids to him. Many years later, one of his first students gave him a courtesy call to meet up. But when Asano do so, he was shocked to attend his funeral. Apparently he committed suicide from bullying. This made Asano rethink his education policies and that he needs to make strong students. He started learning martial arts and brainwashed techniques and managed to build a big new campus while leaving the old one behind as reminder of his failure. Now Asano opens the book and instantly gets blown away, believing that Koro will still destroy the Earth when the time comes. Because when Earth is gone, the end will come equally to everyone. However Koro used his skin to protect Asano. He knows how he thinks because they are both educators. Had Koro won, there was no doubt Asano would have opted to blow himself up. Koro is lucky because he has Class 3-E. But this only happened because of Asano. Since Asano isn’t the straightforward guy to admit he has lost, he puts it as Koro accepting his policy and this will allow Class 3-E to remain. Gakushuu can tell his father lost but has also grown since he admits he too will improve as an educator and a parent. As reward, Koro tells his students his ultimate weakness. Just hold down his tentacles and he can’t move. Of course they know it is impossible because had they done it, the assassination would be impossible and he told them because it was impossible in the first place. For the drama festival, Class 3-E does a twisted version of Momotarou. It involves a greedy old man, divorce papers, divorce lawyers and the darkness of the heart. Yeah, very deep stuffs there.

Episode 14
While cleaning the shed, Kaede thinks it is the right time. Untying her hair, a couple of tentacles sprout from the back of her neck as she attacks Koro. She has observed him enough to know his tentacles’ attacking pattern. Of all the types of attacks, falling into a pit is the easiest. Koro falls into the pit and at the bottom are those harmful materials. With Kaede falling above him, he is having it hard to escape but eventually manages to blast a hole to get out. Her classmates are shocked to see Kaede’s other personality. Kaede says this isn’t her real name. She calls Koro a murderer and she is Aguri Yukimura’s younger sister. He seems to know who she is. With that, Kaede will get her revenge another time soon. Everyone remembers Yukimura was their previous homeroom teacher of Class 3-E before Koro. Kaede could be the most famous prodigy actress, Haruna Mase. Apparently Shiro also knows about her. Although she is not under his programme, her great acting skills hid well the pain of the tentacles without showing it to everyone. Flashback reveals Akari (Kaede’s real name) went to visit her sister at the facility but an explosion occurred. As she crawled in, she saw her sister dead and some tentacle creature draped in her blood before flying off. She saw a note saying how it was going to be a homeroom teacher at Kunigigaoka for negotiations. She also found a couple of vials containing tentacle weapons for human implantation. Vengeance and hatred fuels her as she injects the tentacles and will play the perfect part so she could get her revenge. She then dyed her hair and enrolled herself at Kunigigaoka and decide to make Nagisa the main character and herself as the side character. Everyone watches an old movie that Kaede acted in and they confirm it is really her. They wonder if she has been putting up an act all the while. They want to know the truth from Koro or else they can’t accept what is happening. Koro agrees but Kaede has left a message for their duel. At the field, Kaede admits she was faking everything. All part of her acting. Everything. Although some were out of her control, she had to hide her emotions so as not to let her identity slip or else Koro will notice. That is why she is always next to Nagisa as his murderous intent hides her actual feelings. Her classmates can’t believe Koro would do anything this cruel as they remember Yukimura’s short stint as a caring teacher. Kaede attacks Koro with her flaming tentacles. She is channelling the pain until she doesn’t feel it anymore. At this rate she will die as the tentacles are taking over her mind. It seems she is going all out but Nagisa wonders if this is her true feelings. Amidst the madness of wanting to kill Koro and see him die, deep inside she is crying for help.

Episode 15
Because of the bloodlust of the tentacles synchronizing with Kaede, Koro cannot just remove them. His plan is to let her attack his weak point located underneath his heart. At that point, somebody needs to talk to her to reduce her bloodlust and then he’ll remove the tentacles to minimize damage. But wouldn’t that kill Koro? Don’t worry. The odds of dying is 50%. Their graduation is more important than his life. So while everyone wonders what to do, Nagisa walks up to Nagisa after Koro straps her. He isn’t going to do a clap of death. Instead he kisses her! OMG! I see some people’s handphone was whipped out faster than the speed of light. This shock reduces Kaede’s bloodlust and Koro is able to extract the tentacles safely. Of course now everyone teases Nagisa but a sniper’s shop almost killed Koro but missed. It is Shiro and his mysterious assassin. Shiro unmasks himself and he is someone Koro knows: Kotarou Yanagisawa, a researcher. He will be his final opponent. Kaede explains at first she was driven by revenge but as she spends more time with Koro, his kindness confused her so she thought of investigating more before acting but by then the tentacles won’t let her back down. Of course with how things turn out now, she doesn’t have to act. Now Koro has to keep his bargain to tell everyone about his past. If you wonder why he is able to teach everyone without a hitch, it is because up until 2 years ago, he was known as the Reaper. The original one. Here is another secret. Whether they successfully assassinate him or not, come March he will still die. Either alone or taking Earth along.

A poor boy born in the slums, he chose to be an assassin as the only truth he believed was that once you’re dead, you don’t come back. After becoming a successful assassin, he was captured and became a subject experiment under Yanagisawa whose purpose is to generate antimatter within life forms. He is subject to torturous experiments every day although his only respite is Yukimura whose job is to check on his vitals after each experiment. Though kind on him, because she is married to Yanagisawa out of pity, he regularly abuses her if she doesn’t get the job done. Like the obedient wife, she doesn’t fight back. One day he can’t stand Yanagisawa’s wife beating and knocks him out with some ultra sound wave. Reaper also found out Yukimura was a teacher though the latter feels he makes a better teacher than her. Ironically he claims that it was one of his students who betrayed him and thus why he ended up here. That student was that faceless Reaper who assumed his identity. Reaper found it baffling because he supervised and developed him almost perfectly and yet this happened. Yukimura thinks his student probably just wanted to be seen by him. As the experiments go on, Reaper was slowly turning into a monster. Of course Yukimura didn’t say anything and continued to obediently observe with a smile despite deep down she knew something was wrong. She as Yanagisawa has intended is supposed to be a living sacrifice.

Episode 16
Reaper’s body becomes more flexible as the experiment goes on. His only respite is talking to Yukimura. He learns Yanagisawa wants her to leave her teaching job to be full time here. She thinks that is the best too because she believes she has failed to give her current students motivation. However she is in a dilemma because she loves her students and being a teacher. It was the first time Reaper consoled her with a genuine smile and encouraged her she could do it. There was a lab rat subjected to the same experiment like Reaper earlier. It was placed on the moon but it starts going berserk and explodes, destroying 70% of the moon. If this the consequences from a lab rat, what are the consequences from a human? That’s right. Full planet annihilation. It will be on 13th March. Yanagisawa wants this experiment stopped and kill Reaper. Yukimura heard this and tells Reaper but this is all part of his plan. He has been waiting to unleash his newfound powers. Despite Yukimura’s plea to not go down the path of evil, he dismisses and threatens to kill her if she doesn’t escape. After all, how can a puny human like her stop him? She’s not even worth holding as hostage. Yanagisawa and his security team go all out to stop Reaper but he has turned into a killing machine slaughtering everything. Luckily those harmful materials as traps are around but not enough to kill him. In the midst of the chaos, Yanagisawa is blinded in his left eye.

Once the facility is destroyed, Reaper thinks of taking this world with him since he is going to die anyway. Yukimura tries to stop him by hugging him but this triggers a trap and it pierces her. This was part of her plan. She thought if her words don’t get through him, this will. It made Reaper think he could have saved her and instead of using his powers for destruction, used it to help others. Yukimura doesn’t mind if she dies for him. She hopes he would use his remaining time to teach her students who are also wandering in the darkness like him. Reaper vowed to use his remaining time to become a teacher. Therefore it is Yukimura he has to thank for in teaching him to be a teacher for she truly looked at people before herself and not judge them on their weaknesses. With everyone hearing Koro’s full story, memories of the last 9 months spent with him flash through their minds. It then dawned upon them if they really have to kill him. After all 13th March is the same day of Kunigigaoka’s graduation day. As winter break arrives, nobody thought up of any assassination plan. Kaede is still recovering in hospital and although she feels at home when her friends visit, she still cannot get over the fact Nagisa kissed her. That ruined her acting abilities. Can’t act again? By the time the third term comes, Koro is the only one chirpy as usual and his students aren’t in the mood. Only 64 days to D-Day. Karasuma wonders if Koro can still carry out his duties as a teacher after that revelation. If Koro can’t be flexible as the situation calls for it, he wouldn’t qualify as a teacher. Bitch motivates the students to think about it instead of giving up. Nagisa calls his classmates together as he wants to think of a way to save Koro.

Episode 17
However Nakamura is against Nagisa’s idea. Koro has worked hard to build this bond over the past year and it is precisely the reason why they have to kill him. Karma adds that by not using their assassination skills would be an insult to weaker ones who tried to kill Koro. With their ideas clashing, Karma eggs Nagisa to fight him and they really did. The guys try to break them up and surprisingly Koro intervenes to mediate. He suggests having a paintball death match. One side will represent to kill him and the other to save him. Whichever side wins will have that wish respected with no grudges. So the students divide themselves as they give their reasons why they want to kill or save Koro. Except for Ritsu due to her programming conflict, she remains neutral. Yeah, how the heck is a computer going to run in the jungle? With both sides having equal numbers, it eventually looks like a fight between team Nagisa (to save) and team Karma (to kill). A team wins when the other side is completely annihilated or capture the enemy’s flag. The game begins with lots of high skill jungle guerrilla tactics. One by one both sides take each other out. Just when Karma thought his side has more people to capture the flag, they are instantly killed off by Nagisa who came into the scene as silent and deadly. Yup, an ultimate showdown between Nagisa and Karma eventually.

Episode 18
Karma realizes Nagisa was hiding behind Karasuma who is the referee to hide his presence. When Karma walks out in the open, daring Nagisa to shoot him, the latter knows he can’t because it would be contradicting to his policy to save Koro with this dirty tactic. The only way is a hand to hand combat. So we see them analyse each other from their past before the action begins. Karma theoretically is better since he is more accustomed to fights. But Nagisa’s resourcefulness has him fight on par with him. Just when it looked Karma knocked out Nagisa, Nagisa was playing possum and used his last ounce of strength to use his clap stun. Karma saw it coming and withstood that. Nagisa quickly draws out his knife at him. However it was a decoy as he tosses it away and then jumps to choke him in his arms so he would give in. Karma manages to reach a knife and could have easily stabbed him but he realizes this win won’t be acceptable because Nagisa was fighting him via martial arts. Karma gives up but Nagisa was so in focus he couldn’t hear till Karasuma called out. With this settled, everyone is back to being friends again. Later, the class learns that there are many other research teams doing their own research in a bid to save Earth. Many are top official secrets but Ritsu has hacked her way in. One of them that caught their eye is an American research team conducting some experiment on ISS. But how are they going up there to steal its data? Koro reveals a craft made by Japan to be launched carrying an experimental dummy to ISS. What if it carries real humans? That’s right. They’re going to ride it up there. If you’re going to do it, go all the way!

Episode 19
Class 3-E research and experiment about going to space. As the rocket can only carry 2 people, at first all the guys are eager to volunteer. But then not so when they find out how unproven its maiden voyage is. It is suggested Nagisa and Karma take the ride. So we see the rest of Class 3-E sneaking into the base and hijacking the remote controls of the command centre. Too easy. Nagisa and Karma then snuck into the capsule as it blasts off to ISS. After docking, the duo take one of the astronauts hostage and threaten with a bomb. However the astronauts are calm and composed. They are also trained soldiers and have been running experiments not knowing when it is going to blow up so a little bomb threat is nothing. After talking about their plan to get their data, the astronauts agree to hand it to them. After helping them do a bit of chores. Nagisa and Karma say their goodbye as the astronauts view them as true heroes. On the orbital re-entry, Ritsu helps with the calculations and of course Koro helping a bit with his pushing. They land safely and back in the classroom, Okuda analyses the data to make medicine that will decrease the risk of Koro exploding down to 1%. Heck, it is easy to make and the components seem to be that poison Okuda made before. However the dilemma now is whether to continue with their assassination of Koro, which was what this class was about. Should they call it off as of today? Wait. I thought they wanted to save him? Nagisa, it’s your call. As long as Koro is around, the government will not call off the assassination programme even if the chances are small. From all those fancy motivational words Nagisa says, I guess we’re still going to keep up with this assassination thingy as their conviction. Because their ‘assassination’ is proof of their bond with Koro.

Episode 20
Koro tries to do Christmas and New Year all in February because they’ve missed it. Besides, it’ll be their last if the world is destroyed. Nevertheless, the students talk about their future plans. Almost all would love to go to high school or college other than Kunigigaoka but not Karma. He wants to stay back because what better way than to tease and get back at those for putting him here. Nagisa is unsure about his occupation. So when Sakura notes he should be a teacher because that is what he is to her (or he could be her boyfriend!), Nagisa contemplates on that. Valentine’s Day is here. Nakamura and Karma know it is all written over on Kaede’s face that she wants to give her chocolates to Nagisa. Yeah, one kiss could screw up her entire acting skills. So in their bid to enjoy teasing her, they show her the other students giving their chocolates in their own way. They’ll take care of Koro who has become some sort of paparazzi. Just hand him a sexy photo of Yukimura in her swimsuit and he will be focused on it for days to come. At first Kaede is nervous but eventually seeing Nagisa for who he is, she gives her chocolates in her cheery and natural way. Too bad only Okajima didn’t get any chocolates. Heck, even Asano gave Koro chocolates because he realized the importance of Koro supporting students from the bottom as he ruled from the top. Bitch is also throwing a lavish Valentine’s dinner for Karasuma but he isn’t impressed. Of course they get to business talking about the assassination in with Bitch feels it isn’t so bad if the world ended because it will spare the students the heartache of failure. Karasuma wants her to quit after this is over as her emotions don’t make her fit to be an assassin. She is upset about this as there is no way she could go back walking in the sun. He offers her to work with his department to save more lives rather than kill. Bitch feels she is all alone if she does so but he vaguely hints she could come stay with him. You mean like, getting married and become part of his family?! She won’t miss this chance even if the world ends.

Episode 21
With everyone qualifying to get into their high school of their choice, Koro decides to celebrate by making a yearbook. However he has scandalous and embarrassing photos of everyone he has took for the past year! Peeping master?! The students rip all of them! I guess there is nothing left but to take new photos then. Nagisa tutors Sakura and hopes with this last test she could go back to school without fear. But she still has trauma of being bullied so Nagisa uses his deadly assassin technique which also serves as a double edged sword to calm her nerves down. This leads him to decide he wants to become a teacher. When Koro is alone at school one night, the government initiates their final plan to kill him. A super space laser cannon fires down on the school. Wow. Did they get inspiration from some video game? It doesn’t destroy anything but Koro. However he manages to dodge it. They expect this and initiate laser cannons that lock him inside the school. It won’t kill him but just a cage to prevent him from escaping. Because the laser cannon was fired at only 20% to avoid him detecting it. It will recharge in a week and will be blasted at 100%. With the military cordoning the area off, they also let the press know about the dangerous monster that destroyed part of the moon. The students didn’t like how the media is making Koro look like the bad guy but even if they plead he is a good guy, they think Koro made them say this and the trauma of being held hostage by him. The students see Karasuma for an explanation. Time’s up. It’s their turn to act. So they’re b*tching about others stealing their prey when they couldn’t kill or save him in time? Nagisa remains stubborn so Karasuma tackles him and says don’t give him any more trouble. But Nagisa knows this is a coded plea for help because he remembers he told them he will need their help whenever in trouble. Koro doesn’t fear death but his wish is to see his students one last time. At least he has ample time to do a supersize yearbook. The students do lots of careful and elaborate planning to sneak back into school. Then they make a move with 3 hours left to the deadline.

Episode 22
We see how the students take out all the soldiers guarding the area with ease. It’s their home ground anyway. It’s to show us how much they have grown. Finally they get to meet Koro. Time for their final lesson on happiness, gratitude and life. It’ll be full of frustrations and pressure anyway so don’t renounce society when that happens. They then proceed to celebrate Koro’s birthday. Since it is already a year since the moon was partly destroyed, Yukimura decided to make it his birthday. But the celebration is interrupted when Yanagisawa and his mysterious assassin attacks. The latter is no other than Reaper. He is literally now a tentacle monster! He is considered a much better version of Koro as all his skills are amplified. Because he volunteered for this experiment, his hatred makes it possible to be compatible with the tentacles. Also, his tentacles are not designed for long term. This means they can draw out more energy at the exchange of shortening his lifespan. Even when he dies, there is no danger of him exploding. Koro remembers taking on Reaper as his student. Despite he taught him well and never saw any avenue for him to betray, he realized he wasn’t properly looking at him. For example, Reaper wanted to show off what he learnt but was cut short or Koro didn’t show interest. Yanagisawa isn’t going to let Reaper do all the work. He injects himself with the serum to attain superhuman powers. At this point he doesn’t care about his own life. As long as he can kill that monster who took everything away from him, it’s a fair trade. Koro isn’t going to stand there and get his ass handed to him. He is going to show for the first time what it means to fight back with every last ounce of strength.

Episode 23
Koro is losing?! Arienai! Koro wants Yanagisawa to stay out since as a teacher he wants to guide his former student back to the right path. Dastardly Yanagisawa reveals why he chose this time to act. Because it makes his other students easy targets! He has Reaper attack them and Koro is forced to protect them and takes a real beating. Just when everybody starts thinking that the students are Koro’s biggest weakness ever, Koro dismisses all because his students risked their limbs to save him. That is why they are not a weak point or hindrance and is proud of them. Anyhow, Yanagisawa plans to slaughter them all once Koro is dead. He is going to run out of energy sooner or later. Kaede then jumps in to fight. As an ex-tentacle user, she could put up a decent fight but it isn’t long before she gets pierced through her body! Her death makes Koro go into full rage. So it’s like powering up like Super Saiyan too? When the monsters clash, it seems Koro is giving out all sorts of colourful lights which they deduce are his emotions. The blast is so powerful that it knocks away Yanagisawa out of the field. Because his cells are made up of those tentacle materials, this means he gets instantly disintegrated once he is outside the barrier. As for Reaper, Koro stabs him in the heart to give him a ‘peaceful’ graduation. Flashbacks of Reaper trying to appeal to Koro. All he wanted was to be acknowledged by him. To be like him. Koro now understands how he feels. Had he acted differently, he might have been able to guide him down a different path. With Koro’s victory, there is no joy because Kaede’s dead, right? Well not quite. When she was stabbed, Koro managed to quickly take her blood and somatic cells and stored them in sterile pressured air. All during battle! Can you believe it?! After all, he has already reserved a few tentacles to protect his students all the while. Then he does surgery on Kaede to bring her back to life! WTF?! KORO IS GOD!!!!!! With Kaede up and back, it’s time for a big group hug. Now they can celebrate. Koro wonders if Yukimura would think he has done a good job as a teacher because the important thing is not to repeat one’s mistakes.

Episode 24
Koro is tired and collapses, though still conscious. He reminds them he is weak enough for them to kill. Yes. That time has come. The class takes a vote on who wants to save him. All raise their hands. Who wants to kill him? After a little hesitant, all also raise their hands. Make up your minds! As they pin him down, the important thing that never crossed their mind: Who is going to kill him? Nagisa will do it. Koro says his goodbye but keeps it short since an entire day won’t be enough if he is to say it personally to everyone. So he takes class 3-E’s final attendance. So for a good 6 over minutes, we hear Koro say every name of his 28 students slowly and his advice and what they have learnt throughout the year. Then it’s time for Nagisa to stab his heart. But he becomes scared, his hands shaking. He goes crazy but Koro touches him and doesn’t want him to kill him in that state. Be calm. Smile. Nagisa did just that and then stabs the knife in. Goodbye. Koro disappears amidst the glowing yellow balls he is disintegrating to. Once he is gone, it is a big crying fest. Everybody cries. Even badass delinquents cry. Even teachers cry. Even the robot cries. Even I cried :’(. While Karasuma handles the military outside, the students return to their classroom only to find Koro has left each on their desk a graduation scroll, a very thick yearbook and an equally thick guidebook on how to live. They read until they fall asleep in the morning. They have graduated.

Episode 25
Karasuma thanks and apologizes to his students. Surprisingly they have moved on and thank him instead for all the support. During the graduation ceremony, Nagisa realizes that Koro has never mentioned about the E-class system being wrong. Because if you have time to whine and complain, might as well use it to change things. Nagisa is shocked to see his dad attending the ceremony with mom. Apparently Koro talked to him before and because he heard how hard his son is trying, he decided to give his family another chance. Wow. Koro even went this far to help him? Another round of tears. After the ceremony is over, unruly reporters try to interview them. Karasuma and his men have their hands full. But Gakushuu and his cronies take command to lead them out to safety. In the after math, the E-class is abolished and the campus is abandoned. As a result for putting those students’ life in danger, Asano resigned from his post. His old students return to help him out. Class 3-E students were paid the reward money as promised but they followed Koro’s advice by donating it to various places and returning the bulk of it to the government for their support. 7 years on, it looks like Karasuma and Bitch are married but things remain the same. Bitch is still trying to flirt with him but he remains a no-nonsense guy. Is it no wonder why they have no children? Hint, hint… Some of the (former) class 3-E students return to their old campus to clean it up since they manage to buy the area. Shouldn’t they have used the reward money to do this? I guess they weren’t thinking about it then. We hear how some of them are doing like Kaede a prominent actress, Sugino a famous baseball player, some with family business go help their parents out and Karma going into politics. All the while thanking and praising Koro for the precious guidance he has imparted. Lastly, Nagisa is now a trainee teacher but it looks like he might have got the short end of the stick because he is in the baddest most delinquent school ever! Hey, is he in the wrong anime? Say, Beelzebub?! The punks think they can bully him but they said the taboo word ‘kill’. Instinctively Nagisa scares them with his killing technique to make those pussies wet their pants. Now how is the real boss? He even dares them to ‘kill’ him before graduation. Koro sensei v2?

To Sir With Love
Although it is quite sad that Koro couldn’t be with his students in the end as some sort of plot twist, I somewhat feel this is a fair ending for everybody and to the series. I know this sounds cliché but Koro might not be physically around but he will always be in their hearts. His demise I feel was somewhat a timely atonement for his earlier sins and despite for that short single year, he is able to make the most out of it and atone his wrongdoings as an assassin. This allows his students to move on and lead fulfilling lives because had Koro continued to live, it would have diluted and cheapened the bond and preparation they worked so hard for the past year. It would be an insult. Even if it was a plot twist, it wouldn’t be a good one. Because bringing back the dead with some sort of lame excuses (to make viewers who can’t handle death happy?) would be the dumbest and insulting thing to us viewers too. So yeah, while it might be sad that Koro is gone but take heart that the world didn’t end and everyone gets to continue living their ordinary lives. Some perhaps more extraordinary than others.

Too bad I thought they would make Nagisa and Kaede and item seeing they did so with Karasuma and Bitch. I guess they are still young and have lots of things to do before they settle down. If not Kaede, maybe Sakura? Oh dear, he’s got a little harem there if I should say. Oh Nagisa, you’re starting to look like a playboy here but thanks to all that assassination and conspiracy drama all around, this romance thingy felt like a distraction than a potential that would blossom. But then again, knowing how Nagisa would think, this kind of romance would be the last on his mind because his current passion now is to be a teacher. I am not sure if Nagisa is going to impart the same assassinating techniques Koro taught him onto the delinquents. But it will be totally awesome if those punks suddenly become the new generation of assassins like Nagisa and his classmates. Or will they bring a new worldly disaster with their newfound powers? Another assassination classroom story for another day.

The pacing of the story towards the finish feels decent as it builds up to what actually became of Koro. So this means that the character development for the other lesser students of class 3-E didn’t get their own screen time as I thought they would. Because right till the end, there are a handful that I didn’t even know their names! So it was somewhat a right move for Koro to take their final attendance because boy I was surprised that a few of them I didn’t even know they existed! Hey. Was this guy in class 3-E before? Of course they are but usually in the background. So while we have a few character developments in focus like on Terasaka and his groupies and Kimura, the rest are basically given none. I guess with all the other important developments to focus on, they can’t be giving each and every of the students their own screen time. Because they have been working as a class, a group and therefore whatever improvements and development they have improved and grown, it applies to class 3-E as a whole. So when Itona finally had his case solved and joined Koro’s class, he somewhat falls into obscurity. Remember Okajima was like the joke character of the series? This season it feels non-existent.

Even Karma feels a bit side-lined in this series. Because of that, he doesn’t feel so badass as in the previous season. His role seems to be to face off with Gakushuu in the term exams and his biggest moment came in facing off with Nagisa over a divided class opinion. And lost. So mostly it is Nagisa overcoming his personal problem with his mom as well as the surprise package Kaede and her painful and horrifying secret being revealed that make the greater impact in this season. All of course reasonably leading up to the inevitable showdown and final. Even Karasuma and Bitch had their little moments but that was mostly in the first half taking on Reaper but after that, not much and they become relegated to observers.

So with less focusing on these students means they have to get other things out of the way first like Gakushuu and Asano. Because with their showdown somewhat ‘early’ and at halfway point, I anticipated that they couldn’t really be the final boss. They couldn’t. Because it is not Kunigigaoka that is supposed to be the real enemy that Koro and his students are supposed to face. This means they aren’t really the true baddies and thus their conclusion to have them ‘accept’ Koro and class 3-E’s method in education policy is somewhat a compromise and a closure to their longstanding rivalry and grudge. I mean, it’s to show that the most ruthless guys in Kunigigaoka aren’t so bad after all and had redeeming qualities. Yeah, it had to be Yanagisawa and his ultimate vengeance and hatred. Thus he is the only character in the series whom I considered really to have been killed.

Just like my confusion from last season, I still find it baffling that Koro has trained up his students with assassination techniques to kill him. Because the more they bond with each other, it becomes obvious that the students don’t really want to kill him. Thus every attempt from outsiders to kill Koro becomes an excuse for our students to go into action to save him. Which makes this entire thing ironic because they’re supposed to kill him but they’re saving him. Also more ironic that it shows they are selfish that they want to kill Koro themselves but I doubt at this point it is the monetary reward they are after at this point. It is too evident that Koro is too nice a guy (even more human than humans, if I should say) that they just want to spend every last second learning with him. Thus I can see why they are hesitant in killing him and giving excuses to postpone his assassination. Yeah, it’s like procrastinating it to the last day. And I’m sure they wouldn’t even want to do it if Koro had not reminded them. But then again, why let a laser cannon do the job and take all the credit.

What makes it more confusing was I thought they were going to save him? What was that space mission to make some medicine for? Was it all for nought? Maybe something else came up and I wasn’t paying attention since I was still under all that confusion. Oh right. The students want to pay tribute to him with his assassination. A culmination of their hard work and bond. So I might be thinking about the irony of training assassins but not for them to kill. Because it is like taking up a course in business and economics but then you go into a music career. But you see, I realized that Koro might seem to be training his students to kill but the important thing that we all might have overlooked is that he is training them to be better people. Assassin doesn’t mean taking lives. It could be ‘kill’ the bad attitude. Or something like that. Hence, that actually sums up what they have been doing the entire year. They can do amazing assassination techniques but they have the brains and rational to use it for the greater good. They don’t have to kill with what they have learnt. And of course all this training to be an assassin isn’t the point why Koro became a teacher. As already revealed, it is to keep good his promise to Yukimura. I’m sure she is very well resting in peace.

Speaking of Koro, he is perhaps the best character and teacher of all time. At least to his students. Funny, witty, serious and skilled (overpowered should be the correct term) at the same time, he dispenses his knowledge and skills like a true teacher. Even despite his tragic past, he still manages to keep his promise and do his job seriously. It is just too bad the rest of the world will never be ready or accept Koro thanks to crazy and selfish governments and higher ups with everyone would be thinking his students have Stockholm Syndrome. If not for the time limit on his life, I believe Koro would have made the world a much better place with his super skills that would put God to shame. Yes, he can do so many impossible stuffs and yet has so many weakness that he seems like a clashing epitome of everything. I mean, when you see him do an amazing surgery that brings back a dead (Kaede wasn’t technically dead yet but very close to it), you would start to believe he is the next coming of Jesus Christ or something even by right Koro can’t create life. But still, if you get to know the real Koro, you can’t help be overwhelmed with respect.

The students of 3-E who sang the opening themes for the first season, reprise their roles for the sequel. Despite Question (first opening theme) and Bye Bye Yesterday (second opening theme) are both rock outfits, at least it didn’t have that strange high 5 rodeo/jumping dance. That painfully awkward dance is still so freaking vivid in my mind. I can never get it out of my head each time I think of this series! Curse you, Koro sensei! Just like last season too, the ending themes are very lovely slow ballads. Both are sung by Shion Miyawaki, Kaketa Tsuki (first ending theme) and Mata Kmi Ni Aeru Hi (second ending theme). Though, I feel the former has a happier tone to it while the latter had a sadder sound.

Overall, this is a very satisfying and fitting end to the series. With it coming to an end, there are lots of mixed and clashing emotions now that I think about all the episodes I have watched in both the seasons. It is as though I was part of Koro’s class and experienced the fun and the laughter, the good times and the bad times, the learning times and trying times. There were funny moments, there were action moments, there were tense moments, there were cringe worthy moments and there were definitely sad moments. It all culminates down to this moment where I too feel like I have graduated with class 3-E. Only difference is that I am still the same useless otaku watching animes on my monitor. Koro would have turned in his grave and exploded the world sooner than expected if he knew the world had no hope in the first place. And a wise creature like him should already know better…

Ansatsu Kyoushitsu

February 21, 2016

After the fun and exciting OVA, it is natural for me to check out the TV series for Ansatsu Kyoushitsu. After all, how much ‘fun’ would it be for a group of students being trained as highly skilled assassins to kill their own teacher? How is that fun you ask? Our yellow alien octopus teacher is no pushover. He is so fast that he anticipates your every move. So fast that he makes his to prevent yours or before you can start. It is quite a challenge to kill him or even get close to just touching him. So with all the strategies they learn via trial and error, experiments and failures, we can see the uncanny teacher-student relationship grow and bond as they hone their skill and a step closer to achieve their ultimate goal in killing him. And I hope they do it fast because did I mention that they have only a one year limit before he does the same to Earth like what he did to the moon?

Episode 1
When Koro sensei enters class, the first thing the students do other than rise and greet their teacher is to take out their machine guns and shoot at him! Too bad. His mach 20 speed means none of their pellets can hit him while he takes their attendance. They thought he pretended not to get hit but as he demonstrates, the pellets may be harmless to humans but a mere touch of it sends his limbs exploding although it will regenerate a few seconds later. Nagisa narrates about their predicament. After the shocking incident where their moon became 70% destroyed, this yellow octopus suddenly becomes the homeroom teacher for class 3-E. Government agent, Karasuma explains to the class of their mission to kill Koro before he does the same to Earth in a year’s time. Currently only people in this room and top leaders of the world know about this. It would be utter panic if word gets out that the world will be destroyed. Governments have attempted to assassinate Koro but he is too fast. Besides, he could have killed everybody if he intended to so they made him a deal. He will teach class 3-E of Kunigigaoka Junior High as a teacher and refrain assassination attempts on them but on condition he cannot harm the students. This way, it gives them a chance to closely observe Koro and what better way than for 30 odd students to get close and attempt to kill him. Kill him and you save Earth. The government will be providing all supplies that can only kill Koro but harmless to humans. Oh, did they mention the reward for this successful assassination is 10 billion Yen! OMG! Well, good luck.

Nagisa is being called by the bullies about their plan to assassinate Koro. Nagisa has taken down observation notes of Koro’s face changing colour depending on the mood but they don’t care about it and reminds him he is the one to do it. This makes Nagisa remember how the school’s rejects are placed in the E class. It is called so because it means End Class. Your life is as good as over. That is why he thinks Koro doesn’t understand. Despite being the target of assassination, it means everyone is acknowledging his power. After all, a nobody like him means nobody else not including this teacher can see him. During class as Nagisa is to submit his finished poem, the bullies believe Nagisa is starting to make his move. Koro can see through Nagisa as he takes out a knife to stab him and quickly counters it. But what Koro did not expect is for Nagisa to become a human sacrifice as he has worn a grenade over his neck! As he hugs Koro, the bullies press the detonation button. Boom! Did they do it?! Nagisa is covered in some membrane and Koro is safe on the ceiling. He reveals it is his once a month ace whereby he shed his skin. Koro becomes so mad at this that it was a face colour Nagisa had never seen before. It was terrifying. Koro zooms off and back again, collecting their family’s plates and threatens if they pull this kind of stunt again, he’ll kill everyone except them. Wait a minute. Wasn’t it supposed to be legit to use any method to kill him? Koro suddenly praises them for a good attempt especially Nagisa’s natural acting that let his guard down. But he doesn’t think that kind of attitude is fit for assassination. They need an assassination worth smiling to be proud of. This motivates Nagisa that he will kill him before next year. Especially about this teacher who might even accept them for trying to kill him. A short flashback sees Koro in his true form (but too dark to see what he is) and his beloved dying in his arms. With his splendid tentacles wrapped around her, she thought he would make a good teacher.

Episode 2
Sugino thinks his baseball laced with pellets can do the trick because if Koro is fast to avoid, the scattering pellets upon impact would get him. But Sugino is too ‘slow’. Before he could throw, Koro took his time to grab the glove and even cleaned the shed before catching the ball! Sugino sinks into depression after this. Karasuma as usual comes in to discuss if they have found any clues but nothing new. This only leaves a bunch of unanswered questions like why he is so willing to teach a class if he is going to blow up Earth. When Koro returns from watching his baseball match in New York, he talks to Sugino to cheer him up. Sugino is more depressed than ever. He was already slow in baseball and that led to him unable to focus on his studies and thus he ended up here. After Koro analyzes his body, he believes Sugino was trying to imitate his favourite baseball player but relays the bad news he can never do that. He knows because he just did the same to that guy and got his autographed! But Sugino can be happy when Koro says his elbows and wrists are more flexible. Train well and he could surpass his idol. Nagisa is puzzled why Koro would go so far as to give such great advice if he is going to destroy Earth. Koro mentions about the promise he must keep when he became a teacher. While he does intend to destroy Earth, he is their teacher first and foremost. Nagisa although felt weird by the circumstances, it is also strangely motivating to be taught by him and being in his assassination classroom is somewhat fun.

When Koro is setting up picnic in the woods, the rest of the students plan to join him but with pretence to kill him. Of course Koro saw through all that thanks to their fake smiles. He easily substitutes their knives with tulips but this only earns their wrath. For they have been planting tulips outside the classroom and he just plucked them like that? Plant it back! Koro the gardener… Meanwhile Karasuma gets permission to become class 3-E’s PE teacher to further and closely observe Koro. We are given a brief explanation of the workings of this school. A handful of students who do not do well in studies are placed in E class and are discriminated against. This serves as motivation, pressure and lesson for others to study hard and not end up there. Karasuma believes those pariahs in End Class are about to snap since the classroom is rundown and located very remotely in the mountains. But to his surprise he sees everybody getting motivated to kill Koro! As atonement for the tulips, he put a handicap on himself by tying himself up on a tree. Kill him if you can. Still too fast, though. But the branch snaps! Kill him! Too bad, not fast enough. Koro escapes to the rooftop and he becomes cocky after barely escaped assassination. He doubles their homework! So petty… The students are feeling happy since this is the closest they have got to killing him.

Episode 3
Now that Karasuma is officially their PE teacher, Koro feels left out! The students wonder what good it will do if he is their teacher. He demonstrates by having a few students attack him with a knife. He easily pins them down. If they can’t even touch him, there is no way they can even get to Koro. Nagisa is surprised to see Karma returning. He was in suspension for some time. Karma goes up to shake hands with Koro and suddenly Koro’s hand explodes! Karma’s hand was laced with those Koro-killing materials. This puts Koro in such a defensive mode that Karma starts mocking him he must be this scared. The class is amazed he easily got to Koro. Then in class when Karma somehow stole Koro’s gelato, the octopus becomes mad and is about to retrieve it but stepped on those pellets. He dares Koro to kill him because once he does, his status as teacher will end. He’ll be just a murderous monster. Nagisa narrates about Karma’s violent tendencies that landed him in this class despite having superb grades. He is smart enough to draw the line and knows Koro cannot lay a finger on the students and is using that to his advantage to piss him off. Karma is even happier that Koro is a real teacher because he will get a chance to kill a real teacher as the last one died on him.

Karma thought he could piss off Koro by putting a dead octopus on his desk but Koro has answers for that as he makes warm takoyaki for him. Since Koro is now on the high alert, whatever tricks Karma pull is of no use. Koro is too fast for him and even has time to take ‘special care’ of him. Doing his hair and manicure? One day after Karma confirms from Koro that he will certainly risk his life to protect his student, Karma jumps down the cliff! He is going to kill himself and at the same time kill Koro if he rescues him! Even if Koro lets him die, his life as a teacher is over. It’s game over for him. This has Karma remember how he got into 3-E. His previous teacher told him he was on his side since Karma is a smart student. However Karma beat up a top student after he was bullying another student from End Class. That is when the teacher showed his true colours. If this top student’s grade is affected, his job is compromised. Even more so, Karma sided with the End Class. After all, Karma’s grades were the only reason why this teacher sided with him and he turned a blind eye towards his violent nature. At that point, that teacher was ‘dead’ to him. I think he didn’t die. Karma trashed the room and scared the sh*t out of him. Karma finds himself safely landing on some sticky web made from Koro’s tentacles. Koro praises his suicide approach to kill him. Because a human’s body cannot withstand mach 20, saving him at that speed would have killed him and thus he has to slow down and therefore a chance for Karma to kill him. Since letting Karma die is not an option, this sticky situation is what he came up with. Karma is still motivated to kill him but looks like he doesn’t need Koro’s ‘pampering’ anymore. Karma might have the last laugh because he stole Koro’s purse and took all of his meagre money. Consider it as donation.

Episode 4
Koro sees a lady being harassed by bullies and goes to her rescue. Irina Jelavich is a new English teacher for 3-E and is now head over heels for that octopus! Her brazen flirting with Koro in front of class makes it uneasy for the students. Starting to hate her? Even more baffling is that Koro’s face turned pink in embarrassment because he loves boobs! Now they really hate her. Of course Nagisa knows something amiss if a teacher like her gets transferred here. After Irina sets Koro off to Vietnam to get her some coffee, that is when she reveals her true colours. She is a pro assassin who has taken out prominent figures around the world with her seduction. The government hired her for this job. She threatens the class not to call her by her first name and will kill any of those who interfere with her assassination. You kids sit back and watch how adults get things done. Those bullies are actually her henchmen as they lay out a trap for Koro. Irina then kisses Nagisa as motivation to divulge some of his observations on Koro. She doesn’t do real teaching and I guess this has the students start calling her Bitch. Well, she did say not to refer to her first name but… Maybe it is Japanese pronunciation problem too. When Koro comes back, she lures him into the shed hinting of doing something naughty with him. As she goes to strip herself, that is when her men start firing incessantly at Koro. She could have actually succeeded this mission is not for one fatal flaw: She used real lead bullets instead since she viewed those pellets as a joke. Because of that, Koro still lives as the lead melts inside his body! He knew about her plan because he could smell lead and old men in the shed. Should have taken Nagisa’s advice seriously, eh? Now Koro proceeds to ‘tentacle rape’ her. The students are curious to know what he has done to her. He made her feel good with all the massaging around her body and some adult stuffs with his tentacles… Bitch won’t forgive him over this embarrassing failure.

Because she is so obsessed in trying to plan for her revenge instead of teaching class, the students request her to switch with Koro. She badmouths them about being trash so why the hell study and even raises the stake that she’ll pay 5 million each if the assassination is successful. With that money, they don’t need to study anymore. The plan backfires when the students throw stuffs at her and tell her to get out! Bitch goes to complain to Karasuma so he goes to show her Koro setting questions at lightning speed. But why does he look like taking ages? Because he sets different questions to each student, taking into account their strengths and weaknesses. Then he shows her the students training hard to strike and move better with their knife. Because Bitch makes a big deal about being a pro assassin, if she can’t be both an assassin and teacher, that makes her the most inept pro here. Don’t look down on the students and she should apologize if she wants to stick around for a second chance. So when Bitch returns to class, she teaches a bold seduction line. Her first lesson? As she uses seduction techniques around the world, the best way to get to your target is to speak in your lover’s language. Her lessons will involve them in how to sweet talk to foreigners. After this if they still don’t think of her as a teacher, she’ll pack up and leave. The class is glad that she is acting like a teacher now. But they still can’t give up on calling her Bitch sensei. Yeah, that name has caught on to them… Karasuma learns that Koro actually knew about hiring a globetrotting assassin for his students to speak foreign languages. It is like the more they try to make it a perfect place for assassination, the more it becomes a proper place to learn. Could Koro have them wrapped around his fingers? Or tentacles in this case?

Episode 5
Koro must be getting used to the class. Especially their sneak attacks. So it is particularly shocking when shy girl Okuda goes up to him and says it straight to his face to drink her poisons! He agrees! Besides, we know human poison can’t kill him, right? The first poison has him grow mini horns (doesn’t he look like Sonic?), the next one wings on his head (Onsokumaru?) and finally the last one just a blank face. Koro will not allow Okuda to make poison unsupervised and wants her to come with him after school so that he can teach her how to make poison that will kill him! For real?! We learn Okuda has trouble expressing herself in words, the reason she ended up here despite her science and chemistry grades are superb. So the next day when she is done with her poison, Koro drinks it and he powers up like Super Saiyan and… Melts?! Actually this poison stimulates his cells and enhances his fluidity. He is now faster and can hide in any small places. So did Koro lie to Okuda? Here is the lesson of the day. No matter how potent your poison, it is wasted if you offer it in such a naïve way that your target can take advantage of. Asking Nagisa how he would do it (offer and mixing it in his favourite drink perhaps), to deceive someone, you must understand their feelings and tailor your words accordingly. Thus language is the effective key to poisoning. Assassinating Koro might still be a long way off but the students are having fun learning things like this every day.

Class 3-E students are trekking through the danger filled jungle. Why do the dangers seem to target Taiga Okajima? Poor guy. Luckily he is still alive after all that. To prevent them from affecting other students, their classroom is located deep in the mountains and are forbidden to step on school ground. The only exception is during general assembly held once a month in which they must be there before all other classes arrive. Koro is left behind so as not to jeopardize his identity. So lonely… As expected, 3-E students are ridiculed by everyone. But those ugly top students are in shock to see handsome teachers for class 3-E. Who the hell is that hot bitch?! Especially when she is suffocating Nagisa in her boobs as she pesters him for more info on Koro! Further discrimination includes no handouts for 3-E so they have to memorize everything. But here comes Koro zooming in faster than everyone can see to give his handwritten handouts to them. Bitch tries to kill him in public and this sends 3-E laughing at her futile attempts. The other students are shocked that they aren’t suffering as expected. Later, Nagisa’s ‘old friends’ try to threaten to kill him to make him know his place. However with that deadly look in his eyes and telling them off as if they know how to kill has them backing off and feeling scared. The principal, Gakuhou Asano has noticed 3-E shoving aside those who get in their way. This is not how his school works. He is going to make a few changes and the assassination can wait. This is now his top priority.

Episode 6
Midterms will soon be here so Koro is using his high speed to tutor each one of them! I wonder if they’re fast to keep up with his personal tutoring. Later Koro drops by to see Asano who assures he will not interfere with the assassination process. However he notes that Class 3-E must remain as it is. Something about his policy to have 95% hard workers and 5% scums as the model to ‘motivate’ the 95% to do better. He heard a complaint how a 3-E student ‘threatened to kill’. Under his policies, that is a no-go. Please keep that student in control. He suddenly throws some lock puzzle for Koro to solve in a second! He got himself tangled up! He says that speed cannot solve everything. When Koro continues his speed tutoring, the students can tell he is a little sloppy. Koro’s hope is to see their happy faces when they score high but when they say they don’t even need to study hard or get good grades after killing him since they’ll get 10 billion Yen and live the easy life, this makes Koro mad. Oh no. He calls everyone outside to the field and has Karasuma and Bitch explain about their planning for assassination. In short, there must always be a backup plan. Therefore their thinking is that they’ll be fine as long as they got this assassination. Isn’t that just trying to avoid dealing with their inferiority complex? What will they have left if somebody else successfully kills him? His motto for the day: Those who can’t wield a second blade aren’t qualified to be assassins. His flashy tornado turns out to be trimming and making nice the field. This is some sort of warning that he’ll flatten the entire neighbourhood if they cannot show him their second blade by tomorrow. It is the midterms that he has been honing their ‘second blade’ for some time. He wants all of them to place in the top 50 otherwise he will leave.

During the exams, 3-E students are dumbfounded with the tough questions. However they remember the method and approach that Koro taught to them and it soon becomes a piece of cake. They’re doing so well that the invigilating teacher is scared! Then halfway through, they are hit with a very tough question. Game over. 3-E students score the lowest as expected. It seems Asano expanded the syllabus 2 days ago and taught it to everyone in the main campus! Koro feels responsible for this that he can’t face them. He almost gets killed by Karma. How can he dodge their assassination if he doesn’t face them? Karma shows them his grades. He scored high and some of them perfect! Remember, he is a smart guy. Koro’s tutoring only polished him further and that is why he could handle the change in syllabus. He is sticking around in 3-E as this class is more fun than his old one. He then says it back to Koro that he is the one scared and using their failure as excuse to run away. All the students agree and start laughing. Koro is mad (in a fun way) and vows to do some pay back twofold during the final term exams.

Episode 7
If you have seen the OVA, this episode is exactly the class trip to Kyoto. Only expanded. It’s like they’ve gotten lazy do to other episodes? Anyway, it will bring back familiar memories to see the school going on the class trip via train, Koro making a freaking thick and heavy guidebook (enough to kill!) for every freaking possible scenario they might encounter, Kanzaki getting her own guidebook stolen by delinquents of other school who want to kidnap and have fun with her, the delinquents corner Nagisa’s group and kidnapping Kanzaki and Kaede (there is only a limit to how many people Karma can beat up at once), Kanzaki’s flashback of how she wanted to get away from the strict elite life and turned rogue one night but was caught on camera (thus the delinquent boss remembering all about her and wanting to have some fun with her), the kidnapped girls’ dramatic rescue (thanks to the guidebook that pinpoints what to do in case of such scenario. See! How useful it is!), Koro owning all the dumb delinquents while lecturing about how class 3-E are better than all of them despite being labelled pariahs and finally the best use of the guidebook: Smack it down on the delinquents’ head! Everything ends well and Kanzaki isn’t shaken a bit at all. Maybe except her hesitation. Good. Because they can continue their school trip and return trying to kill Koro.

Episode 8
Continuing from the second half of the OVA, we are familiar with the sniper, Red Eye who tries to take out Koro but each attempt gets thwarted. So much so that he is losing his confidence and gets a surprised when Koro visits in person and joins him for dinner. Then he learns why Koro is looking forward to his assassination during this trip and even gets some life lessons, so much so he decides to quit this mission to expand his view of assassination in other areas. What a great teacher indeed. You will also remember the short segment where they try to peek at Koro in the bath naked but with his tricks he got away scot free. Also, the guys come up with a ranking list of the hottest girls in their class. Koro caught wind of it and now they’re out to kill him. It’s the same for the girls. Well, not so. They can’t come up with any guys and the most 2 or 3 of them. Then they have Bitch tell about her feminine ways as she tries to brag about her seduction experience but since they notice Koro is here listening, they start harassing him about his love life in which he promptly escapes. Catch that octopus and make him talk before killing him! Now both sides are out to kill him, Koro runs into Karasuma’s room. He is probably the ‘safest’ because that smart guy knows and does not pry further into his past life. With the school trip over, Karasuma talks to his higher ups who are worried about the failed attempts and time is running out. However they inform him that the allied nations have pooled their resources to create some technology. With the approval of the Japanese Defence Minister, class 3-E will soon have 2 very special assassins with superhuman abilities granted by science joining as transfer students. While one still needs time to sort out some quirks, the other is already all set to go and once they get back, they’ll have a surprise waiting for them back in class.

Episode 9
Everybody can’t wait to see the new transfer student. She’s female. I can see why the guys are excited. But… Sitting there is a huge computer machine. So the transfer student is a digitized 2D girl? Didn’t see this coming! Because Autonomously Thinking Fixed Artillery (AFTA) is registered as a student, this means she can try to kill Koro but he cannot harm her as per the contract. And so AFTA starts shooting all the pellets and Koro avoids them. None hit. She analyzes his pattern and evolves her attacking pattern. Koro thinks she is using the same technique again but this time a finger gets blown off thanks to the blind spot. AFTA analyzes her increased chance of killing Koro to about 0.003% but at this rate it will be more than 90% by graduation! So for the entire day, she shoots nothing but pellets at him. Class interrupted. And who has to clean up the pellets? Next day as she begins her operation, she finds herself tied up! Is this Koro’s work? Restraining her is like harming her and violation of the contract. However the students say it is them who tied her up because it would be damn annoying if no lessons can be conducted. Don’t worry, they’ll release her after class ends. AFTA realizes at this rate no assassination can be done and needs to consult her ‘parents’ but Koro pays her a visit and teaches her a lesson on why the students interfered with her assassination. Even if she did succeed, the money will go to her ‘parents’. There is nothing in it for them. So like they said, she needs to learn some common sense and cooperate to take him down. Koro also increases AFTA’s abilities but does not touch her assassination techniques. Because he is her teacher first and her target second.

Next day, the students are surprised to see AFTA a bit bigger. She is now a fully digitized girl with cute emotions! A real 2D girl! Koro spent all his money in his wallet for this upgrade including a full LCD screen. Now he only has 5 Yen left! AFTA is also capable of several emotions (2D girl cried?!) and is willing to get along with her classmates. However she is getting more popular with them and this makes Koro jealous! Yeah, thank the upgrades. The students give her a new name: Ritsu. But as Karma notes, she is just following Koro’s programme and it is not like she has her own free will. What happens from now will depend on her ‘parents’. Of course those scientists are horrified to see their machine. So they take her apart and reset her back to default by removing any programmes that are useless in assassination. Of course this is also a testing ground for them because if this machine is successfully, they’ll stand to make trillions selling it to warring nations. Next day, Karasuma announces that the contract has been clarified. Any attempts to alter the machine in any other way are considered as harming and thus a violation. The same goes for the fellow students. Unauthorized alterations will be considered as harmful. With this downgrade, the students fear another session of flying pellets. But surprise! Ritsu blooms flowers instead! Although her upgrades were removed, she learnt from her fellow students the importance of cooperation in assassination. So before she was reset, she hid the relevant software in the corner of her memories. This mean the computer defied her master for the first time. Look at it this way. It is like a teenager rebelling against his parents. Everyone is happy to welcome her to the class again.

Episode 10
Bitch has had it teaching. This isn’t what her job is supposed to be. Too deep in her thoughts that she didn’t realize she has stepped into a wire trap strangling her neck. She is surprised to see her master, Lovro, a retired assassin who now trains young ones in his trade and the one who recommended Bitch for this Koro killing job. Lovro tells Bitch that he’ll be taking over her since once her cover is blown, she is useless as an assassin. But Koro suggests holding a mock assassination and the one who kills Karasuma first wins. So after Karasuma explains the gist to the students, here comes Bitch trying to seduce him. Not working at all. We all know her tactics well. Karasuma is not amused being made the target so Koro throws him a deal that if he manages to evade both of them, he will stand still for a second enough to let him kill him. The only condition is that he mustn’t tell them about this or else they’ll work together and throw him the victory. When Lovro goes for a direct attack, Karasuma is able to grab his wrist. He then warns Lovro if he fails to kill him today, there is no chance he can kill that octopus. Why is Koro so afraid of him?! Lovro knows he cannot continue with this mission seeing the bruise he has on his wrist from the grab so Koro tells him to watch Bitch see through her mission. So here she goes during lunch time trying another sexy seduction. I guess he got bored so he allows her to kill him. If you think that is all there is to her, then you’d be surprised how she suddenly uses wires to trap him. Luckily he has the strength to stop her plunging the knife. Bitch knows she’ll lose if this turns into a contest of strength but Karasuma gives up and lets her ‘kill’ him since she doesn’t have all day to deal with an idiot who doesn’t know how to call it quits. All the while, Koro telling Lovro about how Bitch has worked her way to master and learn new things and a crucial development for the students as assassins. Lovro allows her to stay after analyzing she might be better off being a teacher. And now for the deal for Karasuma to kill Koro. Don’t worry. He’ll live up to his promise. Just that he will be wearing a freaking thick armour!

Nagisa, Karma and Ritsu (now bumming in Nagisa’s handphone) hope Koro could take them with him to see a movie that has been adapted from a comic book, Sonic Ninja. It’s in Hawaii He would gladly love to. Don’t worry. He’ll fly ‘gently’ and his head is enough to deflect the resistance and sound. And his tentacles deflect the oncoming particles too. The safest airlines ever! Koro also provides his customized earphones for them since the movie is in English for words they do not understand (thanks to Bitch’s classes, at least they have a decent knowledge in English). Although Koro is emotionally touched by the ending, Karma thought it was pretty clichéd with the plot of the antagonist turning out to be the heroine’s brother. To pay for the free ride to Hawaii, Koro has them write a report on the movie before blasting off to tutor maths of one of his students. A guy asks a kid if he can see Koro flying. He can. This means he is good enough to kill him. Yes, he will be killing his brother who will also be his teacher starting tomorrow.

Episode 11
The class knows about the new transfer student today so they ask Ritsu for more information. She explains they were originally planned to be introduced together as she handles long range attacks while he tackles close range. However that was cancelled for 2 reasons. Because it took him longer to be prepared and Ritsu lacked the capability to support him. That sounds dangerous. Here he comes now. Oh wait. That mage is his guardian, Shiro. The real emotionless kid, Itona Horibe didn’t use the door but barges through the wall! Is he strong enough for you? He claims he is not interested in killing those who are weak. This means Koro as the strongest is his only target. The shocking revelation as he proclaims, they are brothers! The students want answers but Koro is always certain he was the only child. Oh, so he had parents? Further proof that they might be related is that Itona’s habits are exactly the same as Koro. Itona wants to settle this sibling rivalry after school. The classroom becomes a ‘ring’ and the only rules are whoever steps out of it will die and no spectators shall be hurt. Violating them results in instant loss and death. As soon as Shiro gives the signal to start, Itona was so fast that a tentacle of Koro is cut off! The shocking fact was not this but rather Itona’s hair is tentacles!!! Koro’s face turns black as he is seriously mad on how Itona got those tentacles. Not telling. Itona continues to attack and drive Koro to a corner. His tricks of skin shedding saved him once. But this is all part of Shiro’s careful calculation. Because Koro’s limbs regeneration and skin shedding takes stamina, this means Koro is gradually weakened and slowed. Also, the use of his tentacles depends on his mood and in this frantic state, Koro cannot fully utilize them. In no time Koro will be killed.

Just when Itona is about to land the killing blow, Itona’s tentacles are cut off. If Itona’s tentacles are of the same structure as his, this means he is also prone to be hurt by all the special materials. Koro swiftly stole his students’ knives and let Itona touch them. Then he wraps him in his shed skin and throws him outside. It is Itona’s loss by right but if he wants to continue living, stay in his class with his other students. There are some things that are obtained via experience. Itona goes berserk that he lost and is about to fatally attack Koro. Shiro shoots Itona out and it is back to the drawing board. Don’t worry. They’ll be back after some tweaking. Koro will not let him take his student but he can’t touch Shiro since his clothes has that harmful material. In the aftermath, Koro feels embarrassed because he was supposed to be a comical character but let his serious side ruined it! But the students seriously want to know about the truth. Koro finally reveals… He is an artificial life form! But the students are not surprised. They figure no octopus can go up to mach 20 and since he dismissed he is no alien, he must be an artificial life form. Plus, with Itona in the picture, Koro might have been created earlier. But as for questions why he was created or came here, Koro won’t say. Take it as a motivation to save the Earth. Do it and the truth will be revealed. And the only way is to kill him. Hey wait. How can a dead octopus speak? Later the students seek Karasuma’s help to learn more advanced assassination techniques. They once thought somebody would just kill him so they didn’t take the job seriously. But now they realize if somebody beats them to it, it would mean all their hard work was for naught. They want to kill Koro themselves. That’s the spirit. Now the first step is to undergo Karasuma’s tough training. Don’t regret it now…

Episode 12
Sugino passes by his old baseball teammates. They think he’s got it easy slacking off while they have to be top in their studies and game. But the baseball captain, Kazutaka Shindou maintains his arrogance that top people like them are chosen unlike them who excel at none. For the school sports, Class E is always omitted from it but will play an exhibition match at the end. For humiliation purposes of course. While the girls will take on the basketball team, the boys will face the baseball team. As Sugino is the best player they’ve got, they ask him for some tips but Sugino thinks it is useless as he paints Shindou like a mega star. He hopes Koro can coach them. Oh, he is itching to play ball. During the exhibition match, Koro hides as a ground ball to give signal and tips to the 3-E guys. The baseball team remains cocky this will be easy pickings but boy, will they be surprised with the tricks 3-E has under their sleeves. Thanks to Koro’s ‘intensive’ training, as long as they catch their opponents by surprise, they’ll stay ahead. So much so the baseball team is losing spirit and their coach is panicking. This is when Asano decides to take over and provides the necessary education and motivation for the team to get back up. They manage to claw their way back and Koro doesn’t even have an answer to this?! But he tells Karma to shake things up by provoking the crowd. When it comes down to the decisive game, Karma and Yuuma Isogai stand within touching distance of Shindou as tight defence. Asano tells Shindou not to mind them as 3-E will be penalized for obstructing. However this still gets to him and when he swings, the duo move enough to dodge. With Karma playing mind games with him, Shindou has a mental breakdown. He flops the next hit and 3-E wins the game! A major upset! Now they’re even after the midterm fiasco. Sugino continues to admire Shindou as the best player but the latter is confused of his intentions of playing this match if it is not to prove his superiority. Well, he just wanted to show off a little to his old friends. They both patch up their friendship and Shindou hopes he can play with him against next year in high school. Well, if the world is still around then.

Episode 13
Karasuma analyzes some of the students that have greatly improved. He suddenly senses a great threat coming quickly from behind. His quick reflex has him judo throw Nagisa. He wonders if this is just his imagination. Karasuma is surprised his colleague from the Ministry of Defence, Akira Takaoka will be assisting him in his training. At first everybody loves this chubby guy thanks to his very friendly nature and his penchant to share his expensive and famous sweets. But with Karma skipping all of his class and Karasuma realizing something horrifying about him, the students learn too late of his true nature. At first it starts off with a very gruelling training schedule right up till the night. One of the students complained and he got beaten up! Holy sh*t! What if a girl disagrees? I think that is more than just a power slap. Takaoka claims he is the father of this ‘family’ and you can’t say no to your dad, right? Koro is mad but there is nothing he can’t do since Takaoka claims this PE class is his turn and the kids need to toughen up. So what if their education method differs. Takaoka continues his harsh training so much so Karasuma finally can’t take it and steps him to stop his violence. Of course Takaoka says this isn’t violence but education. He challenges Takaoka to pick his best student. He will be given a real knife and if he so much as just touches him, Takaoka will admit defeat and leave. Of course this is just part of scheme to beat down that student and send a fearful warning to everyone. After all, he believes a kid who has never hold a real knife before will panic and not know how to use it and that’s where he’ll intercept and beat the crap out of him.

Karasuma picks Nagisa but gives him a choice whether he wants to do it. Nagisa accepts the role as he can’t forgive Takaoka for what he did to his fellow classmates. Nagisa remains calm and remembers some of Karasuma’s teachings. He doesn’t need to fight him to kill him. All he needs to do is just assassinate him. So Nagisa coolly walks right up to him with a smile and at point blank range, he thrusts his knife with an intention to kill. As Takaoka never expected this, he will be in shock and as he avoids, his centre of balance shifts. Nagisa knows he cannot block a blow from the front so he circles to his back and has his knife at his throat! Game over! Karasuma is shocked that he never expected Nagisa to pull off this move. Imagine if he was a real assassin. What are the potentials? However Takaoka is now furious. He wants a rematch. Before the adults can stop him, Nagisa tells him straight that he definitely cannot win if he fights again. His forced fatherly role does not even come up to half of Karasuma’s professionalism. Thanks for trying to make them strong but sorry, please leave. (Side note: Bitch wonders if Karasuma is their teacher, then who is she to them? Their bitch!!! LOL!!!). Unfortunately Takaoka has become like the Hulk. Only he doesn’t turn green. This time Karasuma knocks him down. Still not willing to give up? Well, now Asano makes his move. As he has seen everything, he agrees that fear is a must in education but putting violence in it makes him the lowest teacher. As the Ministry of Defence has no say in the hiring rights here, this means he calls the shots and Takaoka is dismissed from his position. The students are happy to get Karasuma back but they want him to treat them like Takaoka did. Okay. But Koro won’t be getting a cut since he didn’t do anything! I suppose watching in silence in the background doesn’t count. Oh great, now he’s begging.

Episode 14
Koro has created a makeshift pool for class 3-E. However he is being a wet blanket putting up lots of rules. Then they realize something when he starts screaming like a little girl when he almost fell into the water. Could it be his greatest weakness is water? Yes it is! Ryouma Terasaka is not thrilled that even his buddies have warmed up to that octopus. He makes a fuss that riles everyone up by throwing some sort of insect repellent. In actual fact, Terasaka is working for Shiro and gets paid for doing his part to set the stage for another showdown between Koro and Itona. Next day when Terasaka enters class, Koro is leaking with mucus (I thought it was cheese!) thanks to the effect of that repellent that also dulls the sensitivity of his tentacles. Terasaka then throws down the challenge he will kill Koro today and wants everyone to assemble at the pool. Since when he gets to boss around others? Koro wants everybody to do so since it is Terasaka’s big chance to kill him. Nagisa talks to Terasaka about his plan and that he should talk to everyone about it. But because he continues to be arrogant, Nagisa feels something is off. Despite being confident in his plan, it is as though his words and actions are from somebody else. Terasaka has everyone positioned in the pool. Koro thought he is going to shoot him into the pool where everyone will stab him. But the gun is actually a signal to indicate to Itona to push Koro into the pool. So he thinks. When Terasaka pulls the trigger, a bomb explodes the dam. The pool water rushes out and drags the students with them. Of course this means Koro has to quickly save them but in the process his tentacles will be absorbed with lots of water. Then Itona will come in for the beat down.

Koro takes a beating not only because of his dulled tentacles. Some students are hanging on the edge and he is trying to protect them. Terasaka panics that he didn’t know of this plan and even starts blaming others. Karma punches him for accusing others when he is the only one who was taken for a ride. Terasaka remembers he always used his strength over the weak and asserted control over them. However that did not happen in this school. That trick might never work again. He thought he could get by with his fellow 3-E classmates till that octopus showed up and gave them a huge goal. Terasaka admits he got tricked into this plan. But even so, he wants to choose who gets to pull his strings. He wants Karma to order him around since he is the perpetrator who gets things done. Can he handle it? He’ll bet his life on it. Terasaka goes to challenge Itona. As Karma planned, they need not worry about the other students in danger because Itona’s target is not them although Koro’s attention is divided because they’re still alive. When Shiro orders Itona to knock out Terasaka, his mucus starts to leak. He is wearing the same shirt from yesterday and this means Itona’s tentacles will have the same effect. On Karma’s signal, everybody jumps into the pond and starts splashing over Itona. Shiro is forced to withdraw again or else there’s going to be a big splash party. Karma continues to tease Terasaka but he fires back about the slacker getting the sweet parts. Other students side with him and drag him into the water.

Episode 15
The time for the final exams draws near. Koro has the perfect motivation for class 3-E. As everyone knows, the loss of a tentacle will reduce his capability by 10%. Each student who receives a top score either overall or individual will have the right to shoot off 1 tentacle. Sugino gets a call from Shindou as he warns them about the top 5 of Kunikigaoka. The Big Five as they are known are the smartest and the pride of the school (they look like a bunch of freaks). The top of them all is no other than Asano’s only son, Gakushuu. The Big Five are tutoring class A in their bid to show class 3-E their place. When son sees father (it is odd to hear them addressing each other by their surnames), son is confident of beating 3-E but daddy teaches him a little lesson about strong and weak sides switching places. Gakushuu then asks about daddy keeping some secrets because he has been frequenting class 3-E more often this year. He is not afraid to admit he wants to use this information to control his father. Like father, like son. The seed doesn’t fall far from the tree after all. Class 3-E has booked the library to study but the Big Five had to badmouth and challenge them that whichever of their classes snag the most top rankings in the subjects, the loser must obey the winner. As they are cocky enough to bet their life on it, a little assassination threat scares them away. A taboo word if you’re talking to assassins. When Gakushuu learns of this, he agrees to this but clarifies the rules. Although the winner can ask of one thing of the loser, for them it will be class 3-E to sign this contract which consists additional 50 conditions! Sly. Of course hidden in one of the conditions is for class 3-E to reveal all secrets. With this, he will use it against his father. Class 3-E discusses what they should do if they win. Koro suggests for them hand over the school pamphlet. As they’re already at the bottom, he would like them to experience a lively battle for the top. And now class 3-E steps into the ‘arena’ and face their toughest ‘battle’ yet.

Episode 16
Despite the tough questions, thanks to Koro’s unconventional teaching methods, it is a breeze for some 3-E students. Time for the results. Rio Nakamura scores perfect in English and tops the grade in this subject. Although Kanzaki is top in class for Japanese, Gakushuu got perfect score. Isogai tops the class and grade for social studies and the same for Okuda in science. Although Gakushuu dominates in math, the final score line means class 3-E beats the Big Five 3-2 although overall score the latter obtained more. Mainly because Karma dragged the score down. He gets teased by Koro for being cocky and skipping classes. You mad, bro? Gakushuu, who maintained his number 1 position as the top cat of the grade, goes to see his father who only taunts him about losing to his peers when he threatened to put daddy on a leash. You mad, son? The important lesson is that both sides now realize the importance of what it means to win and lose. They’ll try harder next time. As promised, Koro will allow 3 tentacles to be shot off. However Terasaka and his buddies want him to hold his horses. The quartet scored perfect in home economics. Koro never mentioned what subject they were to ace and now he can’t go back on his words. Man, that’s 7 tentacles off! During the closing ceremony before the summer holidays, as usual class 3-E is mocked but nobody is laughing now. Only class 3-E is standing tall and proud. Asano relishes that this humiliation will make the rest strive harder although he needs to take action so that the true End Class will only be possible. Of course this means much more for Gakushuu who is going to make class 3-E pay for this humiliation. As part of the bargain, class 3-E gets the privilege for a special training camp at the Okinawa resort. That is also where they will cash in on their tentacles destroying right and target Koro’s life. Koro passes them with high scores that they have become formidable assassins.

Episode 17
Nagisa and co are looking for beetles to sell and earn some cash. Hinano Kurahashi is a beetle maniac and knows her stuffs well. However Okajima has a different plan. He has laid out porn magazines as trap for Koro and without a doubt he took the bait. He has experimented with different porn fetish and discovered the different faces Koro puts on. Now that he is so engrossed in this pile of porn, underneath it is a pit trap riddled with those pellets. All that is left is to cut the rope and let him fall in. Yeah. Porn saves the world! Suddenly Koro spots a beetle and this interests Kurahashi. They start chatting lively about it on top of the porn stack. Koro realizes too late that his porn rendezvous is discovered. Feeling ashamed as a teacher? But it seems Koro knew there was a trap underneath but the porn was too tempting! As Kurahashi analyzes the high value of this beetle, she takes it herself and lets the other guys chase after her. Later as the students hone their skills for their upcoming assassination, Bitch slacks because she plans to steal the glory at the final moment. Then Lovro shows up and this gets her ass moving to continue training. They discuss the assassination plan as Lovro points out some of the class’ outstanding assassins. Ryuunosuke Chiba is a first class sniper while Rinka Hayami has dextrous fingers and could easily take down moving targets. Nagisa asks him who the best assassin is. Lovro replies nobody knows his name and he goes by the nickname Shinigami. Lovro then teaches him a deadly technique. Class 3-E arrives at Okinawa. Koro hangs out with different groups who test out their assassination attempts. Other groups on the other hand make preparations. At the end of the fun filled day. Koro is so tanned that he is black! Even his teeth are tanned?! Since it annoys the students as they can’t tell front from back, he sheds his skin to return back to normal. He realized too late he just used his once a month secret move. After feeding him with lots of luxurious food, they bring him to a floating chapel away from the hotel to let him watch a movie. This is where the assassination will begin as here he has nowhere to run.

Episode 18
Koro knows that the sniper duo are stationed faraway on the island getting a good aim at him. Koro is made to watch a movie of all his embarrassing exploits! From porn to cross-dressing to shamelessly taking free samples! And there is an hour worth of it! He might be dead from embarrassment but he realizes his feet are covered with water. He didn’t realize it because it is the natural tide. Now it is time to begin the operation. The 7 students shoot off his 7 tentacles to slow him down. The other students tear apart the chapel and the rest emerge from underwater using some high powered hydraulic motor to form a water cage. Those 7 students fire their bullets but they are not aiming at him. They are firing around him to prevent him to escape. The snipers in the mountains were dummies laced with their smell. The real ones were hidden in the water and now they’re going to take the shot and end this for real. A big explosion occurs. Did they get him? Then out of the water pops a mini Koro! OMG! He is still alive? Using all the energy he has, he shrunk himself into this crystallized ball and this is his ultimate defence. Nothing can break this ball. Then wouldn’t it be unfair if he stays in this form forever? Not quite. There is a downside to it. He will revert to normal in 24 hours and in this mode, he cannot move at all. This means feed him with more of his embarrassing footage? Although Koro highly praises them for getting this close, the students truly felt disappointed. It was their best effort and yet it came nowhere close. Especially the sniper duo who practised so hard and they felt nervous during the real deal.

As the students wallow in disappointment, Nagisa notices that some of them are too tired. Then they collapse or start bleeding. Karasuma gets a mysterious call from the perpetrator admitting that this is his doing. What he has done was injected some of them with a mysterious virus. The only known cure is with him and the only way to get it is to exchange Koro. Since he doesn’t want Karasuma to come, he wants him to send 2 of his shortest students (Nagisa and Kaede) for the exchange at the hotel at the hilltop. If they break the rules or fail slightly, you can kiss the antidote goodbye because leaving the infected untreated will eventually lead to death. Normally the only way is to comply but their guts tell them this guy isn’t going to play fair and there is a chance he won’t give the antidote after the handover. That’s why Koro has a plan. Gathering all the able bodied students, the plan is to infiltrate and steal the cure. As the hotel is laced with guards, the only place without them is a very steep dangerous cliff. If they’re going to make this operation a success, then they will have to climb it.

Episode 19
Karasuma doesn’t think this plan will succeed but the students show they can climb the rocks easily. This is nothing compared to their daily training. They want Karasuma to be the leader of this operation. Everyone is climbing well except for Karasuma since he has to carry Bitch who is nothing but complaining. Why tag along then? I guess she doesn’t want to nurse the sick ones. Ritsu analyzes the floors and looks like they’ll have to take a long complicated route of stairs since elevators to each floor need special pass cards. The lobby is heavily guarded. How can they just pass through? It’s easy for Bitch as she just uses her womanly charms to get all those guys’ attention. Then she plays the piano like a pro and now they’re all ears. The kids could have continued to be mesmerized by her had she not given them the signal to go ahead. The upper floors are easy and they just need to act like guests. On the third floor as they’re about to pass this lone guy, Smog, Yuzuki Fuwa could sense something strange about him. Smog takes out his poisonous gas device. Karasuma takes the full brunt of the gas to save Terasaka. Fuwa remembers his face as the one who poisoned them as he was the waiter that served them their welcome drink. Although Smog denies, Fuwa deduces the events to why some were poisoned and some weren’t and it makes him as the only probable suspect. All thanks to her love for detective manga… Smog wants to call his boss to inform the negotiation failed but the kids block the exits. Faced with weakened Karasuma, he gets cocky. He couldn’t see Karasuma’s speedy kick and feels the full brunt of his force. Smog is out for the count but Karasuma is greatly weakened although he is still conscious and can carry on. On the fifth floor, they encounter yet another killer, the good looking Grip. Oddly he waits for them in the open. But he shows his true strength when he could crush the glass window with his bare hand. He feels disappointed he has to fight kids and is going to call for backup. That is when Karma power smacks his device away and taunts him for being afraid to lose to kids. He might sound intimidating and rough but Koro notices he has been learning from his failures since and not be underestimated.

Episode 20
Grip agrees to fight Karma but as the former attacks, the latter only keeps dodging. When it is Karma’s turn to attack, Grip plays dirty by flushing the poisonous gas in Karma’s face. He thought it is his win but Karma does the same to him. Apparently he stole the device from Smog. Karma somewhat anticipated his move because he was on guard against everything except his bare hands. After all, Grip must have a backup plan as his mission is to stall them. Everyone thought Karma has grown up and matured till he decides to play pranks by putting hot wasabi, chilli, mustard and everything else into Grip’s holes. The next floor is the bar and it has stairways to the VIP room. As the guys stand out, this calls for a job for the girls. Karasuma views it is dangerous for them so how to compromise? I always knew that Nagisa’s girly looks would come in handy one day. Yup, they cross-dress him as they head in to unlock the door from the back. I’m not sure if this is an insult because of all the cute girls, there is this rich spoilt kid, Yuuji Norita who suddenly takes a liking for Nagisa and goes to flirt with her. The girls make Nagisa accompany him till they need him. Apparently some punks also hit on the girls but they show a yakuza emblem which they borrowed from Bitch to scare the wimps away. When they see a lone security guard at the door, they call Nagisa for help. Yuuji doesn’t want to part yet and tries to impress Nagisa with his (lame) dance moves. He accidentally bumps into a punk. The punk bullies him for compensation and Yuuji is scared sh*t. The girls then kick the daylights out of the punk and call the security that this guy had one too many drinks and to take him away. With the coast clear, the girls unlock the door for the guys to join them. Nagisa quickly takes off his girls clothes. Karma had better not spread pictures of girly Nagisa around. A couple of guards are standing at the VIP stairs. They have to take them down in one go or they’ll call for backup. So one of the guys mock them to get them angry. They chase after him but after passing a certain point, the others jump and taser them out. Koro wants the sniper kids to take their guns since they are the best shooters as Karasuma is not back up to speed yet. However he tells them never to shoot to kill and with their skills they can defeat enemies without a scratch. They don’t look too confident, though. Waiting for them in the stage room is the crazy gun tasting Gastro.

Episode 21
Gastro’s keen hearing and memory lets him know where they are. He thinks those kids are not up for killing. A bullet nearly misses him. Hayami meant to shoot away his gun but missed. Gastro gets serious and turns on the stage lights which put them at disadvantage. Koro then shuffles their position by calling them (by nicknames and whatever names specific to them) and guides them where they should move and hide. He doesn’t want Chiba to fire because this would give his position away. While Koro gives his usual motivational talk that the snipers don’t have to bear all the pressure themselves, this gives Gastro time to figure out that one of the students has not moved. Once he pops out, he will shoot. But when he does, Gastro is surprised to find it is just a dummy (one of the kids had the daunting task to create that all in silence). The real Chiba fires at him. Miss? Actually he shot the trusses to knock him out. The rest then tie him up. They move on to the final room. Karasuma has got most of his strength back although not optimum. Nagisa notices Terasaka is also infected but the latter doesn’t want him to squeal considering he has caused trouble to them many times before and doesn’t want to drag everyone down this time. In the final room, they realize the mysterious boss has set explosives on the vaccine. Furthermore, he has lots of spare detonators in anticipation of this. Karasuma recognizes his voice. He is no other than Takaoka! Having everyone coming up to the rooftop, he explains his plan to kill Koro. His bathtub is filled with those pellets and he will bury Kaede and Koro in it under cement. So in order not to harm her, Koro would have to blow himself up and the cement. As for Nagisa, he is here to get his revenge. After losing to him, he was the butt of jokes and humiliated back at the base. Nagisa has no choice but to follow him up to the helipad. He is so agitated they don’t know what he’ll do next. Takaoka makes Nagisa go on his knees to apologize he played dirty and had no skill. He did just that and even got his head stepped on. But like the true devil Takaoka is, he never intended to give the vaccine because he just blows it up and relishes seeing their tormented face. Nagisa then picks up the knife and is going to kill him.

Episode 22
Takaoka encourages Nagisa to kill him. But Terakawa throws the taser at Nagisa and scolds some senses into him about turning into murder despite this guy is just trash. A murder is still murder. Koro agrees with him that Takaoka is not worth killing and wants him to take the taser to stun him out. However Nagisa just puts it away. The words didn’t reach him? Takaoka then easily beats up Nagisa and even gives him some encouragement to fight back as he has some of the vaccine with him. Karma and the rest are in suspense mode, wondering if they should go in or not. Nagisa then remembers Lovro’s deadly technique lesson. A move that will get him out of this pinch. But there are 3 conditions to fulfil. 1) He must have two weapons; 2) His opponent must be an expert; 3) His opponent must know the fear of being killed. With all conditions set for an instant kill that does not necessarily end in death, Nagisa looks set to test him as a guinea pig. Takaoka starts worrying. Once Nagisa is close enough, he drops the knife. As Takaoka is fixated on it, Nagisa then claps his hands very loudly in front of his face. This causes Takaoka’s reflex action to pull back. Nagisa then takes out the taser to stun him. One more jolt will knock him out. Despite Takaoka has done many bad things, Nagisa still has him to thank for some of the lessons he learnt. He smiles and says thank you. This smile brings fears and nightmares to Takaoka as he is stunned out cold. Victory!

Although the vaccine is not enough for everybody, they need to take what they can and get out of here. That is when Gastro and his fellow assassins show up. Do they have a reason to fight now? Surprisingly they’re not going to. Avenging their boss isn’t in the contract. It is revealed that the infected do not have the virus. It is just an enhanced version of a common stomach bug. Therefore the vaccine is not needed. Take these supplements and rest up and in no time they’ll be back to normal. However the virus that Takaoka wanted to use on them was real. Had they actually used it, it would have been sh*t. They went against Takaoka orders to do this enhanced bug enough to make it seem like life threatening because they heard Takaoka never intended to give them the vaccine as he wanted to see their despair face after blowing it up. So the assassins weigh their options that would have a greater impact on their future. The pro assassins are still taken in for questioning but they leave the kids with lots of respect and motivation with their professionalism and coolness. Before you know it, everyone is healed. The government’s attempt to kill Koro fails as he is now back to normal. Koro wants to enjoy himself but since his students point out they’ll be heading back tomorrow, he can’t waste a single second and does everything in lightning speed. This means the boys start shooting him while the girls enjoy themselves playing on the beach. Koro is tempted to join them. Sure, come on in. Till he remembers what the water will do to him. Bitch tries to seduce Karasuma but he is not interested. Give it up. He’s gay ;p. Koro praises Nagisa for doing his best. Once they return to Kunigigaoka, class resumes as normal.

A Teacher To Die For
You know what? I guess the planet is still around and do you know what this means? It means there will be another season! Yay! More Koro sensei and class 3-E antics. I am not sure if the final arc diverted the attention and returned Takaoka to become a villain we love to hate so our characters can turn hero and show us what they have learnt. This means delaying whatever means to kill Koro as they team up to go save their pals? Whatever. Either way it works for me because with such a great series, it would be a shame if it doesn’t get another season seeing there are so many other potentials (Gakushuu’s revenge when?) and unanswered questions (Koro’s origins).

The funny moments and the progression of the plot in seeing how the students plan and scheme their way to get Koro are never dull because the yellow octopus is very unpredictable himself. They keep you intrigued on your feet as you ponder with them what moves they are going to make next. You can’t help sometimes to cheer on the students for their attempt to be successful and when they don’t, you feel equally as bad and down with them.

It goes without saying that Koro remains the best character and teacher ever. Nobody has made learning and education this cool and fun. You have got to love the way he prepares his classes and teaches his students with utmost care as he grooms them to become both a human and pro assassin. Unless you’re a pure demon, you cannot ever find yourself to hate this guy. Especially not the students who have spent many moments with him. Everything he does is for their sake, growth and development. That is why I was wondering even when it comes down to it, can they really pull off the assassination after being so close with him? But after seeing the way they have trained, the interactions and the missions they have pulled off, I am without doubt that when the time comes, they can pull off the assassination without hesitation.

Koro is so cool in what he does and the things he says as lessons in life that you can never find anywhere in any school textbooks or best selling authors’ self motivational books, that sometimes as though he is like God himself. I mean, you can’t already kill him because he is so damn fast and then he stays a hundred steps ahead of you like as though he knows and predicts the future. Like as though he read right out from the script. But the only thing that had me bugging when Koro uses his mach speed is that he may be fast but can the others keep up with his speed? For example when he tutors everybody. He might be fast going from one student to student but when you think about it, the students cannot be lightning fast in finishing their homework or understanding, right? They need time. Normal time. So don’t you think Koro has to slow down and ‘wait’ for them? His super speed is only feasible if he is dodging attacks but not so when it comes to other stuffs like this one.

The biggest irony of Koro is that despite he has so many weaknesses (based on Nagisa’s notes there are more than 30 weaknesses as observed but there could be more as we are unaware of), he looks so vulnerable at any moment and an easy picking. With weaknesses so silly that you think this guy could even lose to a duck. But then he recovers fast enough to avoid being assassinated although there were a handful of times he almost came close to death. Or maybe everyone was just so flabbergasted as the silly weakness that they just lose the motivation to kill? Sometimes you think he is just trolling and acting out to lead them astray but if there is one thing we know about Koro is that he doesn’t lie and you can say he is even more trustworthy than any politicians and lawyers. But Koro is also a big bag of mystery. You think the more you know about him, then something new up his sleeves pops up. It surprises you. Sometimes it gets to you. Like as though he is some sort of final boss that gets stronger the more you think you have weakened him. And then it all goes back to square one. Like a final level game boss character that was never programmed to be defeated anyway.

But something bugs me about the assassination teachings that Koro is training his students. Unless they have changed the definition of assassination, shouldn’t all the training be to focus on taking out a life professionally? And yet Koro forbids the students to do that except if it is to him. Of course they are under contract and the likes and the term assassination may be only used on him. And for the sake of argument that the students manage to kill him. Earth is saved, they received their reward. Then what? I am very sure the Japanese government is like a typical government worldwide would want to hire them as assassins to do their dirty jobs. They’re already pros at a young age and what more when they turn into adults. Their potential is frightening. So if he is training them to be top assassins but yet remain and not lose their compassionate human heart, don’t you think it is not accurate for them to be called assassins? Unless of course the definition of killing a person is different. Like, you ‘kill’ his motivation or ‘kill’ his old self and make him turn into a new leaf. Yeah, maybe that. But it is still worrying that despite assassinating isn’t amounting to killing for these kids, it just feels like glorifying this assassination aspect.

The growth and development of the 3-E are shown at a steady pace. Taking a bunch of rejects and turn them into respectable peers is the kind of underdog story we all love to see. We just hope those who looked down on them would receive their due punishment. However I feel that not all of the students get their fair share of screen time. Some stand out more than others while others whom I can’t remember their names were relegated as being background supporters. Sure, we have seen main ones like Nagisa (I still can’t get over his girly looks after all this time), Karma, Sugino and even Terasaka in action. But what about the obscure ones like, uhm, like that guy and that girl…? Ah, can’t remember their names after all. With a class with almost 30 students, it is hard for everyone to have their own spotlight. I understand this problem when you have lots of characters and each with their own unique personality and potential. Maybe they’ll leave it to next season for their turn to be showcased?

When you think about the concept of Kunigigaoka of shaming 5% of its students just to motivate the rest not to share their fate, it might be a little cruel and discriminating. But who cares if you are the majority, right? I guess this is how countries with ruling dictators work. You make an example out of the few to scare control the rest. And since this school is already starting them young, you can imagine the vicious cycle when they join the workforce and society. Sure, this method is not perfect or ideal, but if you are against this sort of discriminating method, care to suggest any other way that guarantees a higher success rate? It is just sad that the ‘successful’ get it big in their heads and their right to look down on the scums with their superiority. It bugs me that the persecution class 3-E faces every day, do they not get any complaints from their parents? Or do they know very well enough of it but with Asano’s intimidating presence, their parents can only hang their head in silence and shame.

Some characters you can see they have changed greatly like Terasaka who was once a selfish person who couldn’t care less about everything else. He turned into a stronger character who looks out after for his friends especially playing a pivotal role in waking up Nagisa. You’d never expect something like that from his character. And some characters I feel a bit of a letdown like Karma because I was expecting him to be real badass and although he is still badass enough, it just feels that he didn’t live quite up to expectations maybe because he suffers from that lack of screen time syndrome. Then there are those who you can look up to (aside Koro) like Karasuma as he closely observes the growth and change of the students. Some a bit like joke characters like Bitch and Okajima that at first looks feel more like jokers because of their comedic unfortunate circumstances they get into but they are still as lethal as their counterparts.

One of the things that surprised me was the fact that almost the entire cast that voiced the characters in the OVA were replaced in the TV series. Actually I didn’t realize this until Bitch made her appearance. Because I was anticipating to hear Yui Horie’s voice again but then when the character made her debut, she sounded different. This wasn’t Yui Horie. Not to say that Shizuka Itou didn’t do a good job but Yui Horie did left an impression on me voicing this character. Of course as with time, I got used it. Among the other main casts that were switched include Jun Fukuyama as Koro (originally voiced by Tomokazu Seki in the OVA), Tomokazu Sugita as Karasuma (Junichi Suwabe), Mai Fuchigami as Nagisa (Nao Touyama), Aya Suzaki as Kaede (Ayana Taketatsu), Sayuri Yahagi as Okuda (Miho Arakawa), Satomi Satou as Kanzaki (Rina Satou) and Yoshitaka Yamaya as Sugino (Yuutarou Honjou).

In fact I should say that almost all the characters that made their appearance in the OVA had their change in seiyuu for the TV series. The only one that was retained was Nobuhiko Okamoto as Karma. Of course it goes without saying that with the TV series there would be new seiyuus for new characters like Saki Fujita as Ritsu, Sho Hayami as Asano, Kenta Miyake as Takaoka, Megumi Ogata as Itona, Ryota Takeuchi as Shiro, Mamoru Miyano as Gakushuu, Takashi Matsuyama as Lovro and Takehito Koyashi as Gastro.

The students of 3-E sing both the opening theme songs. Although the rock based outfit of the first opener, Seishun Satsubatsuron is to fit the theme and pace of the series, somehow I just don’t find it appealing. Making it even weirder is the dance (if you can call it that) that you see the students doing. I don’t know what the heck is this high 5 rodeo/jumping dance all about. It’s so weird and funny that I couldn’t laugh. Seriously. The second opening theme, Jiriki Hongan Revolution sounds worse in my opinion. Maybe everybody is having fun. That’s what the song sounds like. Sure, it is good for the kids. But not me. Even weirder is that in addition to that weird high 5 dance, now you’ve got the kids doing some sort of arm swinging (like when you’re running) dance. WTF. Having fun, aren’t we? I know these dance movements won’t be catching on in my books forever. However I can take heart that the ending theme is the best of them all. No, I am not being sarcastic. I actually prefer the slow and beautiful ballad of Hello Shooting Star by Moumoon. It’s quite calming to hear this piece after watching the craziness of the episode.

Overall, this is a fun and entertaining watch to see how teacher and students bond in the most unusual way. It was mainly never about killing him to save Earth or whatsoever. It is about giving a chance to those who have been written off. Because no matter how down or useless you are told you are, there is always that potential inside and just needs some polishing up a little. I am sure that with Koro’s mach speed, he can tutor every single human being and guide them to be at least decent. No problem, right? I mean, it is not a daunting task for a super creature like him. Yeah, the irony of a yellow octopus teaching us humans. An insult to humanity? But if that is what it takes to cure stupidity… Oh wait, there is no cure for human stupidity. Look at all the rage and post-before-you-think comments all over the web. Depressing, huh? Then could it be Koro would just kill himself instead? I understand his pain. Because if that’s the case I also don’t want to live on this planet anymore…


December 26, 2014

I read the mixed reviews about Noir here and there on the internet. Some were praising how good this show was while others were harping on its weaknesses and the missed opportunities and the what-ifs and what-nots. And since it is that time for another retro and old school anime, the best and only way that would determine that is to watch it myself. At least the enigmatic synopsis was partly responsible for making me decide to check this out. Two female assassins (one of which is an amnesiac) embarking on a journey to seek answers and mysteries from their past. Of course there is more than meets the eyes as they find themselves digging deeper and deeper and the dangers that await them from enemies of a secret organization.

Episode 1
Mireille Bouquet receives an email from Kirika Yuumura to make a pilgrimage to the past with her. She doesn’t believe but soon changes her mind. She finds and confronts Kirika but the latter runs and thus begins a cat and mouse game in some building under construction. By the time she corners her, several MIBs start shooting at them. You know they’re going to be useless because all the shots they fired at Mireille, they missed. Unlike this hot chick who only needs to pump 1 bullet into them. Yeah, they’re dumb enough to stand out in the open. The chase continues again and it seems the agents are also after Kirika. Mireille is tricked to let her guard down when one of the agents pretend to surrender. She is going to be killed off but Kirika shoots and kills all of them. Now it is her turn to show us some acrobatic action of hers. Once she disposes the last of them, she notes that she can kill this easily but wonder why she doesn’t feel sad. But she’s crying… Doesn’t that mean she is sad? Kirika takes Mireille back to her home to bandage her arm. As Kirika introduces herself, Mireille knows that name of hers isn’t real. She has done some research and everything about her is fake. All documents she handed in were fake. Including the story of her family who is supposed to be transferred to USA for work and thus she is living alone. They were actually missing after they moved overseas. Kirika explains she doesn’t have memories of herself. One day she woke up in this room and the only thing she remembers is Noir. Mireille knows other than her gun, Kirika is hiding something else. A timepiece. It also plays some music that reminds Mireille of something she doesn’t want to remember. She knows Mireille is a hired assassin and the reason she contacted her since MIBs have been hunting her ever since. Mireille tells her 2 things. One, her jobs is to kill people and not help them. Two, she works alone. Kirika pleads to help her so she eventually she agrees to team up with her because now that she knows what she does for a living, she cannot let her live. Knowing the baddies will come after them again, there is something she wants to ask them. Once this is over, she will kill her. They both take a flight to France.

Episode 2
An average guy goes home to his average family. His home explodes!!!!! OMG! At his funeral, the vice chief of the police talks to Jean Jacques Legrand the director of France’s National Public Peace Department that his is already the third case of the killing of national anti-terrorist unit called GIGN. Their identities are supposed to be secret and the only thing that this could happen is there is leak of information. Of course this Legrand guy turns out to be the biggest mole as he meets the key officer, Pierre Cressoy of People’s Armed Alliance (basically a terrorist organization) to get his payment. Mireille already has this info that Legrand sold the roster to Cressoy and is on the case since their client is from another faction of People’s Armed Alliance who is out to finish Legrand and Cressoy in one shot. They stake out their meeting, their huge base and even have the blueprints to chart the exit and entry points. Heck, they even have time to do some shooting practice in the sewers and assemble their guns. Cressoy calls Legrand to the base to inform he caught an opposing member and made him spill the beans. All he knew was some codename called Noir. Legrand knows something about it. It is quite well known in the past and the National Public Peace Department once engaged their services in the 70’s. He wonders if they have been revived or somebody is impersonating that name. Mireille and Kirika ambush the place and kill all the guys including Cressoy. I don’t know how Kirika allowed this guy to creep behind her and strangle her with his wire but she was smart enough to break his glasses and use the temple to stab his neck. Legrand sees this and fears she is Noir. She shoots him. Easy peasy. As they leave, Kirika once again laments she makes a living by killing and is like her daily bread and yet she cannot feel sad. But she’s crying… Mireille’s reply: If they could find that out, she’ll be able to kill her and be done with it.

Episode 3
Albert Dux is their next target. Vanier’s young president died in an accident in which nobody close to him believes it is so. Their client is his widow. Marielle might have seen her before because they go to pay their respects at the same grave. As Dux is remodelling his hotel and staying there, this is the best opportunity to get him. They sneak into it and when Marielle enters the room where he is, it is like they were waiting for her and she is forced to drop her weapon. She is surprised to see the widow with him. Thanks to Kirika, that distraction was enough for the ladies to escape. Dux is surprised that Noir is a team. Marielle is sore since everything was a trap and setup. Wondering why they are targeting them, Kirika deduces that since they are pros like them, somebody else must have hired them in this little game that deals with lives. Their enemy might be the same people who took Kirika’s memories. Because the duo are living up to the Noir legend killing everyone efficiently in their escape (I thought the baddies were just being noisy running everywhere), Dux cuts all power and with his men they use night vision goggles to snuff out the duo. Thankfully in the bar where the duo are trapped, Kirika has laced the place with popcorn and broken glasses so whenever the baddies step on them, she knows where the sound comes from and just shoots in that direction. Cool! All the baddies including Dux get killed this way. The widow creeps up on Mireille and could have killed her if not for the machine gun flashlight and Mireille saw her in time to take action. Once Kirika reactivates the power, the widow is in her dying breath. They even have time to chat about graves and death. Mireille wants to know who hired them but she won’t tell. Would she if she was in her place? Nope. As she asks her name, the widow doesn’t think it matter because it won’t be carved onto their graves either. And now she’s officially dead. In the aftermath, Mireille can’t help wonder if the enemy hired Dux to kill them, why didn’t they reveal their identity. Maybe it was all a game and they are just pieces. The enemy is always watching them from somewhere and they have no choice but to keep winning this game.

Episode 4
Mireille and Kirika infiltrate some party and kill members of a company responsible in providing the necessaries for coup d’état. Yeah. There’s business in war. The most WTF moment was Mireille flirting with one of the men, going up real close to him, run her hands all over him, takes his gun and shoots him! Was that guy really stunned by her beauty? There are 3 targets left, Hammond the boss and his 2 henchmen, Burke and Wellman. Of course Hammond is not going to let this plan fail after planning it for years and will crush those who stand in the way. The ladies stake out Hammond at the airport and they see his daughter, Rosalie. He slaps her for coming uninvited and wants her to board tomorrow’s plane home to New York where her mom is (the parents are divorced). Can it be the day after tomorrow? Because it’s her birthday. No can do. This sucks… Subsequently he changes his mind and she can stay here for a week. Yippee! Burke and Wellman receive a strange note that pinpoints Noir’s location. Hammond thinks of utilizing the mini army nearby. Mireille and Kirika realize they are surrounded and it must have been them who sent information of their whereabouts. Kirika goes out unarmed as the army frisks her. They have searched the house and there is no one. As they start asking her questions, they are shot one by one. Yeah. They never checked the roof, huh? This is the best ironic part. The army in panic and calling for a retreat! WTF?! They can’t even beat a girl on a roof with s pistol compared to their machine guns?! Screw this! Kirika just picks up their machine gun and slaughters all of them! Cool! The ladies are heading to Hammond’s place as the henchmen receive word the scouting army has been annihilated. As they are going to take action, Mireille kills the henchmen before they can start their car. Kirika walks into Hammond’s room and he doesn’t panic. He knew this was coming. Kirika shoots him. He messed up the table… And Rosalie’s present… On the way back, Kirika bumps into happy Rosalie coming in the opposite direction and helps pick up her dropped orange. Then she walks away like nothing happened.

Episode 5
Mireille receives message from Vanel to meet as he has some information. However she was too late because he and his entire family got killed. She blames herself that because she tried to do some research after Dux’s incident, she asked Vanel for some information. He must have found out some clue and as a result he and his family paid the price. She goes to visit a bar master who was Vanel’s old superior. He left a bottle in her name. Seems there is a location of a cathedral written on it. On her way back she has a feeling somebody is following her but looks like the coast is clear. Back home, they find mysterious circles and triangles on the bottle’s label over certain alphabets and numbers. They do a brainstorming and they realize it is hidden in the catacombs. Mireille follows the clues on the bottle which are directions to a specific chamber. Beneath the bones is an envelope. Great. The photocopy is all in French. As she leaves, an agent points a gun to her and takes the document. She knew she was being followed and set this up. Kirika fires the gun off his hand. What she wants is information for him. The hidden snipers begin firing so Kirika goes to take care of them while Mireille chases the agent into the cathedral. She corners him and wants him to spill the beans. He is confident she can’t shoot him because only a few know about their existence. But after thinking of Vanel’s death, probably her rage got the better of her. She shoots and kills him. He wasn’t going to tell anyway, right? Anyway from the document, there is this name called Les Soldats. This is the name of their enemy. Mireille explains that back on her hometown of Corsica, her parents and older brother were killed. She doesn’t know who or why they were killed. That was the last time she saw that timepiece. Therefore it was like Kirika brought it from her past. Kirika says she doesn’t have anything but apologizes anyway.

Episode 6
Mireille and Kirika enter a poor USSR community. There is an old charitable man serving food to the poor and doesn’t seek compensation. The local people who idolize him as a saint might not know his name but he is Yuri Nazarov and was formerly from the KGB. Many decades ago he ordered the execution of the ethnic minority Tashkil. Maybe he is doing this out of atonement. But the survivors of Tashkil are the duo’s clients. Hatred and grudge cannot be erased so easily. Kirika seems to have found a lost stray cat (alien eyes?) and takes it in, wondering about its name and how they are alike. Yeah well, the only way is to ask Soldats. One day as she is out with the cat, Nazarov comes by to say its name is Prince Myshkin. It is his cat that went missing a few days ago and thanks her for taking care for it. As he leaves, he starts collapsing in pain. The doctor diagnoses him as pushing too hard and without regard for his own health. He has warned him before but he paid no heed. He has not long to live. The other people visit him and are very grateful to Kirika who saved him. Kirika sees his family photo dated 1951 from Balkutsk. She thought of carrying out the mission tonight but after seeing him with a couple of children, she didn’t have the heart. Mireille searches for the Balkutsk region but couldn’t find it anywhere. She also learns something new from Kirika. Despite her excellent assassination techniques, knowledge of the underworld and fluent in many languages, she doesn’t know anything about Russian literature. Myshkin is a character of some author labelled as an idiot which signifies pure and innocent. She wonders if Kirika can do her mission since whatever the man Nazarov is today doesn’t have anything to do with them. Whatever he is trying to atone now doesn’t resolve anything. Nazarov remembers watching his family being killed. Mireille after doing extra research has found Balkutsk used to be the home of another ethnic minority, Norga. During Stalin’s era, Tashkil assaulted the village and its name doesn’t even appear in today’s map. As Nazarov is a Norga, both ethnic minorities hated each other for centuries and kept killing each other. Mireille says Kirika doesn’t have to do anything since he is dying but she will carry out the mission. She enters his room and points her gun. He knows his time is up and closes his eyes. Before her heart wavers any further, she pulls the trigger.

Episode 7
Balsan, some great revolutionary leader in some Middle East country is dead. His men ring out the betrayer and all the info they got was that he hired Noir to kill that man who defiled this land in the name of revolution. Too bad the betrayer got shot too. Mireille is driving through the desert and looks like Kirika is injured. They need to make it to a designated spot or they’ll miss their ride out. Seems Mireille was careless in her assassination. She let her guard down when she left and let the target fired a few shots through her stomach. More woes because their jeep just ran out of fuel. And all Kirika could think of is her student ID she lost despite everything on it is fake. Taking refuge in some building, Mireille looks like she is going to shoot Kirika. Cutting off her liabilities? Go ahead. Well… She missed! How could she miss at that range?! Actually, she won’t let her take the easy way out. Her main concern is Soldats and once she has them answer her questions, then she’ll kill her. Meanwhile the revolutionaries find the empty jeep. Oh yeah. Easy trail of blood… So while Mireille is out, those guys barge in and are surprised to see a young girl as the assassin. They bring her back to the base and one of the men found her ID card in the hallway. Since she is ‘infatuated’ with it, the boss beats her up and isn’t going to let her die a painless death. After spamming us the same scene with Mireille’s young past of her in some room, we are now shown a little more. Everybody else is dead! Night fall, Mireille infiltrates the base and those guys really aren’t doing their patrolling job well. It took a single woman to take all of them out! Kirika then mumbles about the definition of Noir (something about being double deaths of an ancient fate). The boss is stupid enough to put his face close enough for her to slice his neck! Mireille jumps in to take care of the rest. And to know these guys were fighting for some revolution… As they leave, Kirika can’t help ponder who she is. As Mireille best summarizes, a very deep and pitch black thread that binds them.

Episode 8
Noir just finish disposing some mafia head, Don Lucio Greone. They are doing this to get some ancient contract which contains clues to Soldats. The family’s big head, Don Salvatore quickly summons Intoccabile. He is pleased once Silvana who is also his granddaughter has arrived. He calls her worthy to lead the family because she killed her own father when he broke the family’s code. He entrusts the family to her and gives her the knife she killed her father with. First order of business? Kill grandpa! He accepts this fate for taking away her freedom. Funny, is this how the mafia call love? Meanwhile Mireille gets to know that Intoccabile has been contacted. She once met Silvana when she was young since her father was on friendly terms with the prominent men there. She views Silvana as a very brutal princess. Silvana has snuffed out the traitor, Rizzo who sold the family out and joined forces with the Mexicans. She has her men torture his woman into revealing why he hired Noir for the job. They want this ancient contract but he doesn’t know why. Silvana hires 3 mafia ‘saints’ (Paolo, Dominique and Francesco) but doesn’t want them to hunt Noir down. She knows they’ll come since she has the contract and is going to make it easier to lure them. They kill Rizzo by making look like a suicide. Noir knows it is a trap and although Mireille is shivering in her pants for she knows she cannot defeat Silvana, she still has to go do it. They infiltrate the place that night. Kirika has a tough time with Paolo and Dominique and got slightly injured. Mireille distracts Francesco by shooting the fire extinguisher before ultimately extinguishing his life. Then she enters the room to confront Silvana. For the first time she sees the face of Noir. Francesco hanging on to his last ounce of life barges in and fires all the way. Mireille takes him out and then flees. When Paolo and Dominique return and wonder if Silvana has seen how Noir looks like, she says she didn’t. Noir escapes and Kirika wonders if Silvana has seen her face. She doesn’t know. All she knows is that she blew her chance.

Episode 9
Mireille makes her way to Sicily. Funny, Silvana too. But she is going to investigate about the contract and some father priest that this contract was drawn up by the founder of the Greone family and a noble who gave the family stewardship of the land. In short, this is the origin of the Greone family. Though it is puzzling why Noir would want this. Besides, Greone family only spans back 200 years compared to Noir’s ‘thousand year history of darkness’. We are shown a clip of Mireille and Silvana. Looks like they were friends and played together. When Mireille was close to the cliff, she felt scared. However Silvana says she has no fear, took out her dagger and sliced her flower hair wreath. I supposed it scared the sh*t out of her. In Sicily, Mireille really gets a big surprise when Silvana is there too. Looks like she saw her face after all. Mireille didn’t think she would remember her because they only met once that one time. Silvana clearly remembers her because she was shivering. Just like now. Then she kisses her. It’s not a sign of love. It’s the kiss of death. She’ll be waiting at the temple tomorrow with the contract. It is the place where she killed her father. Kirika squares off with Paolo and Dominique. Another tough battle. She manages to trick Paolo by hiding in the waterfall and then shoot him dead. Dominique keeps firing as Kirika climbs the spiral stairs. He thought he got her when she falls straight down. Actually it was more like bungee. The moment she is the same level with him, she fires her gun. Now it’s Mireille against Silvana. Mireille must be scared sh*t because despite holding a gun, she can’t shoot it as Silvana charges with her knife. She could have been fatally stabbed if not for Kirika firing a shot to break off the knife tip in time. Phew. Then it’s a race to get each other’s weapon. I think the blade must be cursed because now despite Silvana picking up the gun, she’s scared stiff when Mireille charges at her like a mad bull with the broken tip. Yup. Stabbed her this time. Before she dies, she gives the contract. It is believed that the witness on the contract is a member of Soldats. Mireille wonders if the organization has existed this long.

Episode 10
A court case of a corrupted police officer, the judge drops all charges against him. Of course we know this isn’t really justice… However that guy isn’t going to get the last laugh because Noir is on the job to take him out. Surprisingly, somebody else beat them to it. Even all his police escorts are taken out. Noir receive half payment and it seems their client thinks they are the ones who did the job. There is still another half and that is the judge. They go investigate around the black market and it seems that the people think Noir really did a good job on this corrupted officer. But Mireille wonders if they are referring to them or another person impersonating as them. When the judge returns home, he is surprised to see this girl, Chloe warning him that he is on Noir’s hit list. That made him sweat in his pants? Noir goes to confront the judge. I thought it was rather dumb of them to confront him in the face. Shouldn’t they have snipe him from the shadows? Sure, they want to draw the other party out but looks like the judge has surrounded the place with his corrupted police. Now what? Thanks to Chloe’s distraction in killing one of the cops, the duo go into action and start shooting every one of them. If those are the capabilities of those officers, they were never a threat in the first place. Especially this one who just shoot with his eyes close till he ran out of bullets. Then when Kirika pops out coolly before him, he picks up his dead colleague’s gun and fires away. He missed all of his shots!!! Kirika only needs to pump one bullet into him. Now that all the useless cops are dead, Chloe faces off with the judge and kills him. Looks like she beat Noir to it again. I thought his death scream sounded like a monkey. Mireille and Kirika point their gun at Chloe and demand her identity. She calls herself the true Noir. It is wise for them to let her leave because her hand is faster than theirs.

Episode 11
Mireille receives a call saying that he has left something in her post box. It turns out to be another copy of the contract. This has them note that it is taken from the same book but photocopied at different times. Then the mysterious caller calls again and wants to meet them. This elderly guy says he is a loyal Soldats member and is acting under their will. He will reveal the book’s location in 3 days. Before Mireille can further question him, he disappears. No matter how they chase, they lost him. Back at some place, that guy is surprised Chloe visits him and assures he was given permission to make contact with the Noir duo. He cannot understand why she is watching him and deems Altena dangerous. He is going to report this but Chloe mentions it has been decided. I guess it’s the curtains for him. Scores of agents are hunting down the Noir duo but as usual, they kick ass and make them die like ants. Back at Mireille’s place, they ponder if Soldats really wants to kill them when Chloe suddenly drops by. Who the heck invited her in? She’s very sharp too because she knows all the sneaky tricks that they plan to do including all the hidden weapons. And why the heck did Kirika have to invite her to stay for tea?! Mireille is giving that what-the-hell-you-do-that-for-you-b*tch look. Oh, they have tea in the dark because the moonlight is beautiful. Mireille tries to ask some serious questions but isn’t getting any answers because as Altena always told her, the answer you must always search it yourself. Who the heck is Altena anyway? The only thing Chloe says is that the book inscribes everything including why she calls herself the true Noir and is different than them. After that, Chloe leaves like as though she had a fun tea party and keeps a fork that Kirika kept hidden in her sleeve. Kirika could tell that the old guy who is supposed to tell them the book’s location is already dead.

Episode 12
Conrad Zellner punishes and kills his men who failed. A retired German general, Reimann has been living in the Alps when Chloe comes to see him. He knows his time is up so he has Chloe take a stroll with him. He tells her about his days in the German army and did lots of morally questionable deeds. However he has learnt that Soldats is absolute and to never disobey them. Suddenly several men from STG are here to kill him but Chloe dispatches them all with ease. Chloe’s intention isn’t to save him but because nobody shall hinder her task of killing him, she will kill all those who get in the way. Over wine, Reimann tells her that STG used to be East Germany’s national security bureau. After the Berlin Wall came down, Conrad used it to build a criminal organization and smuggle narcotics. He and Zellner although were in the same team, they never liked each other to a point they killed each other’s family. He only realizes it all when Zellner killed his daughter. Chloe also explains she is Noir and he is surprised because he has heard of them but never seen them in person. Now it’s time to die. He hopes she could spare his bodyguard since they know nothing about Soldats. She promises and he gets a swift death. His bodyguard isn’t happy and wants to shoot her but she warns him she would rather keep her promise. Zellner gets word that Reimann is dead but confused that somebody else did it and not his men. He wants to launch an investigation when Chloe comes in and kills everybody. And that’s the end of that. Chloe happily returns to Altena and has so much to tell her. She mentions she has met Kirika and gives the fork to her. Hey… Mireille and Kirika didn’t make a single appearance!

Episode 13
Ever since Kirika sees a guy painting by the lake, she got interested in sketching and bought some tools to do the same. She might be a good assassin but her art… Ah well, it’s art. Meanwhile Mireille gets her hair done and the hairdresser informs her that Christian Galle has returned to Paris. He was Morgan’s right hand man which Mireille done in a couple of years ago. Despite he was serving time in South America, he has been pardoned and back gathering men to get his revenge. Kirika continues to draw with that guy who even shows her where to buy the best drawing tools. Mireille sees this and since she doesn’t even know his name, she warns Kirika not to see him again. Well, not likely. Because the next day she sees him resting under the tree. When she picks up his coat, a medal falls out. He tells her to keep it as he was once part of the Foreign Legion. He introduces himself as Milosh Havel from Czechoslovakia. He is painting and thinking if he should rejoin the Legion. He asks about Kirika but she seems hesitant. He doesn’t probe further. That night after dinner, Mireille and Kirika know Galle’s men are tailing them. You should see the surprise on their face when they realize the ladies ambushed them. Galle is cornered but luck is on his side since he got away when his man drives by to pick him up. Next day, unheeding Mireille’s advice, Kirika continues to see Milosh. After they part, she sees a rare tile in the paint shop that he wanted and goes to buy for him. As she is about to give him, Galle drives by and opens fire, Mafia style. Kirika is quick to hide but Milosh took all the hits. Kirika for once displays more emotions than her robot face. Milosh sees her gun and understood. That’s it for him. Later, Mireille has got a tip off of Galle’s hideout so the Noir duo head there to get their revenge. Everybody dies. Kirika shoots Galle. In the aftermath, Kirika has this pensive look on her face (isn’t it like always?) while Mireille has this I-told-you-so look. She’s not too happy about it either.

Episode 14
Mireille is thrilled to see her uncle, Claude Feyder in Paris. Her uncle?! Heck, he looks young enough to be her brother! They talk about things especially how if his brother, Laurent didn’t die, they would have not been kicked out of Corsica. When Mireille was young and after her parents were killed, the Bouquet family and syndicate collapsed to a rival syndicate that eventually took over Corsica. Claude fled with Mireille to Paris and has been taking care of her till she becomes independent. Out of the blue he asks if she knows about Noir. She pretends she doesn’t know. She wants to know why he is asking so he says it is okay if she doesn’t know. Claude goes to see his friend Dupois. He wants to hire him to find out the killer who has been going on a high profile killing spree recently. Actually, Claude is that killer! Dupois thought he was joking but I guess it isn’t since Claude shoots him. He was on their hit list too. Claude invites Mireille to his greenhouse but she knows there is more to this. He tells her of a big job he has now. She thought of helping but he wants her to sit back and watch. His next target is Kirika. Mireille realizes Soldats hired him and he is surprised she knows them. He can’t tell her more for their sake as he must finish the mission or he’ll be crushed. This was why Laurent and his family were killed. They were going against Soldats. Because Claude swore loyalty to them and followed their orders without question, it’s the reason he was able to leave Corsica alive with her. He warns her that once Soldats gets a hold of anyone, they’ll never let go. Mireille agrees to bring Kirika here tonight. Mireille’s target practice is off since her heart is troubled and tears welling up in her eyes. That night, Kirika insists she come with Mireille to Claude’s greenhouse. After Mireille goes to see Claude, Kirika knows the bodyguards are laying an ambush for her and kills them first. Claude sees Mireille and realizes what is going to happen after seeing Kirika is still alive. They both draw their gun and fire at the same time. I’m not sure if Claude missed on purpose but Mireille’s shot instantly killed him.

Episode 15
After Minister Song leaves the temple, this woman, Shaoli bumps into him. He notices a scratch on his hand and soon after he dies from the poison. When Noir returns to their home, they see a letter. It’s from Soldats wanting to go to Taiwan for a job. Hong Yiban is a powerful triad organization and their job is to kill their elder, Wu Jihua. Mireille takes on the job but not to complete it. Rather, she will go unmask Soldats. Altena is sad when Chloe left a farewell note to her. Seems Altena was the one who gave the job to the Noir duo. Could it be Chloe is worried about them? Altena will be watching over her. Wu Jihua discusses with his man that they took out Song because he was acting on behalf for Soldats. However Soldats have discovered them behind this and are now out to eliminate them. They are not going to sit back and let them do that and are going to fight back. They have information that Noir has entered Taiwan and that Soldats isn’t unified. There is a picture of this man sent by Soldats and if they keep an eye on him, they’ll eventually catch Noir. Shaoli is assigned to kill Noir. Mireille and Kirika meet up with the Soldats’ man who tells them about Shaoli and also someone leaking information. But Mireille is not interested in that and wants to know more about Soldats. Kirika realizes the place is surrounded so everybody starts shooting and running for cover. Mireille goes after the guy but loses him. Shaoli faces him instead and scratches his face with her poison. Mireille is not pleased her only lead is dead when she is ambushed by Shaoli and falls a few storeys off. At least she missed her poison nails. Meanwhile Kirika almost got bombed and is about to get her brains blown off but Chloe saves her in the nick of time. Mireille continues to struggle against Shaoli.

Episode 16
Mireille is captured as Shaoli runs her fingers through her face and body, teasing like she might scratch her any time. But she won’t kill her and is going to use her as bait to lure the other one out. When they leave the grounds, Kirika is before them. Begins one of the biggest WTF moments. Kirika walks slowly up the stairs as everyone pulls out their guns. Then when she whips hers out and starts firing, it’s too late for them to counter attack. Why the heck didn’t they shoot in the first place? What were they waiting for?! Every shot counts for Kirika while those stupid bodyguards miss each one. Feels like you want to scream at them and go take some shooting lessons but don’t bother because they’re going to die. Yeah. Dropping like flies. Kirika runs off into the bushes. Kirika gets help from Chloe in dispatching the morons and Chloe’s presence throws them off because they didn’t think there is another Noir. Mireille has her behind saved by Chloe. I don’t know how many bullets Kirika pumped but it felt like forever, unlimited ammo cheat code activated. The chicken leader gets away and contacts his buddy to regroup. He is confident they can find a way since they know how Noir looks like. Little does he know his buddy is dead and Mireille picked up the phone. Next time, don’t just start ranting off. You might not even know if it’s the wrong number. Thanks to that, they sneak into their base and shoot everyone including Wu Jihua. No chance! But not everybody is killed by them. Shaoli killed their informant. Later she goes to see Yun Shutong who is the one who also hired her to kill off Hong Yiban. As he is a member of Soldats, he is also the one who leaks information about them for the purpose of allying with the strong. You might have seen this betrayal coming when Yun dies after inhaling the incense. And he thought keeping his distance was enough. But why did Shaoli survive? I don’t see her wearing mask. Does she not breathe? Mireille and Kirika make their way to Yun’s place when they see Chloe who leaves her trails for her to follow. Chloe meets Shaoli who believes she killed Yun to gain entry into Soldats. However Chloe isn’t impressed and only tells her Soldats has no use of her. Shaoli is so mad that I thought the way she clenched her fist, she would have poisoned herself. Anyway, she made the mistake of trying to attack Chloe. She is fast to avoid and slices her. That’s the end of that. Mireille and Kirika now point their gun at her as Kirika asks Chloe if she knows about her. Le Grand Retour. Some great return that they must endure its trials in preparation for it.

Episode 17
Mireille returns to Corsica alone after a long while. She visits her old mansion. The rubbles are still standing. Bringing back those dreaded memories? Her old servant, Mary is surprised to see her and invites her to her home but Mireille soon have to leave because she knows that many old people who saw her got this uncomfortable feeling and she doesn’t want to get them involved. The bodyguards of Bertonie pick her up to see him. She assures she is not here for revenge but to visit the graves. She asks about her parents and he assures he didn’t kill them. There are rumours that some colossal power eliminated Laurent and that power came from outside Corsica. He advises her to see George Madelin, Laurent’s old right hand man as he may know more. Mireille thought he is dead but according to Bertonie he is still alive. His other advice is to leave this island quickly. When Mireille goes to see George, he has this big shock on his face and rushes back into his house and wouldn’t let her in, forcing her to leave. But she doesn’t give up and sees him while he is in the bar. She asks about the timepiece that belongs to her father. George is again surprised but won’t say it here. He will tell everything tomorrow at their old mansion. The Bouquet family held power in Corsica for generations because of their link to a big organization. Can you guess? Yup. Soldats. Her parents are member of Soldats and the timepiece is proof of their ‘membership’. Mireille finds it hard to believe since Soldats killed them. True. Suddenly a sniper shoots George. In his last breath, he reveals they were killed because of trying to protect her. Mireille goes after the sniper and plays a cat and mouse game till she gets him. Surprisingly Chloe is here too. She mentions the sniper’s mission to eliminate all those who tries opening the seal to Corsica’s past. She is not here to help or hinder him. Sightseeing? You wish. Corsica hols a special place for her and Kirika. She has a request. If Kirika wishes to return home, please do not stop her. For Chloe will make the journey with her. Otherwise she will kill her. Of course she won’t want it that way as she would love to be friends with her. After all, she is a child of Soldats. Mireille returns home and tells Kirika what she has learnt and starts crying.

Episode 18
Mireille must be under a lot of stress. She points her gun at Kirika, asking who she is about being true Noir and the likes. Yeah. This even makes Kirika cry. Despite she acknowledge her assassin skills which could even be better than hers, she calls her a disturbing enigma. She needs time for herself so she tells Kirika to leave. Reluctantly (and heartbroken?), Kirika did just that and starts thinking about who the hell she is. Then she gets picked up by a Soldats messenger. He is not here to kill her or anything despite the order of sanctioning Noir has been given out. Also, Chloe is not the one to sanction them as she is under Altena’s control. She only listens to her. She is an influential person in Soldats and wishes for Le Grand Retour. However some believe her methods are dangerous. He tells her the address where she can get more information. But when she arrives, that guy is already dead. In his hands are photocopies from the book. He contacts the messenger from his handphone and asks for the copies. He is reluctant since he senses he is in danger but soon agrees to meet up one last time. On her way back, Chloe stands before her. She is here to warn something is about to happen to Mireille. You know those sanctions? She is sure Mireille will not miss this opportunity to meet but this is a trap. Normally Chloe won’t give a damn but felt compelled to tell her since Mireille is Kirika’s friend. Mireille is already waiting at the square at the designated time. Kirika is rushing as fast as she can. Mireille is being cautious but she couldn’t have guessed who in this crowded area. Before she can be shot by an old man, Kirika stabs him in the neck with something sharp. Right on time. In the aftermath, Kirika lets Mireille see the copies. Probably it is sarcasm when she quips she decided to save her instead of following up on the lead for these copies. But I guess that’s her way of saying thanks and they’re back on good terms again. Mireille knows Kirika’s pain is deeper than hers that it’s unbearable but Kirika needs to know what it is.

Episode 19
Mireille gets mail of another clue. This leads them to a historical documents researcher who tells them the photocopy is from a reference book of ancient documents from the Middle Ages. It is called Langonel Manuscript since it was transcribed secretly in a Langonel Monastery. However nothing is known about the original. There are books in Paris and Berlin but were burnt down during the war. However the proof of these photocopies indicates that the manuscript still exists somewhere. The duo continue their research and it leads them to an old multi-millionaire in Austria. Meanwhile the higher up of Soldats lament they have to kill the Noir duo although they would love to have them join their ranks. It’s because Altena’s influence is growing and they sent orders to their best knights under the pretence of a trial to sanction them. Mireille and Kirika hit another dead end because the Austrian dude tells them the manuscript was burnt down in his library. Feel free to examine the remains. As they rue another dead end, here comes Chloe. She hints that Noir has roots and origins in Soldats. Noir is supposed to be the blades of Soldats. Through time, the ritual of accession to Noir was lost and only terror elicited by that name remained in the underworld. Many outlaws claim themselves to be Noir while not knowing its true meaning. Mireille remembers she coincidentally picked that name as codename for them but from what Chloe says it seems their twisted strings of fate is entangling all over them. Suddenly agents try to kill them. Chloe is also target. Perhaps this is what this trial is all about. To see if they are fit to become Noir. Of course the girls kick ass while those guys are just useless. As worthless as dummy practice dolls. Mireille sees Kirika and Chloe killing in sync. They’re so natural… Once it’s over, Chloe whispers to Kirika that Soldats is not her enemy. They were born and raised in the nest of Soldats to become the greatest assassins and thus the true Noir. Therefore Soldats is her home. Although Kirika may have lost her memories, she believes she remembers everything. Kirika can’t take it anymore and tells her to stop. When Chloe starts reciting some Noir line and salute, Kirika automatically follows suit. I guess it’s true then. Mireille couldn’t believe at what she is seeing. Chloe will see her one more time in the future and by then she will bring her to the Manor. Kirika has a deep thought about wanting to believe that a normal her existed somewhere. Now she regrets knowing. Especially with Mireille looking at her with those eyes.

Episode 20
Chloe returns to Altena and loves hearing this ‘bedtime story’. From what I understand, it is how Soldats was founded. Thousands of years ago, there was this plot to gain power and many were killed. Those who survived vowed to protect the weak and persecuted. So they swore loyalty and secrecy and that was how Soldats was formed to seek revenge against the world. The Soldats higher ups are also talking about preserving this world by continuing to be active but Altena is trying to realize Soldats’ ideal by reviving Noir. They view that as a farce. However if she champions its cause, they cannot openly oppose her. But if the ritual is performed, she will become the next high priestess and become the highest authority in Soldats. Her view is that if love can kill, then hate will save. Mireille talks to Kirika that Noir wasn’t the beginning of it but the very reason they came after them. Although they have been sanctioned, yet their identities have been hidden from the assassins nor are they being attacked in their home. Because this is part of the rules and fate of those who are to become Noir. Mireille is still bothered by Chloe’s words that she and Kirika are the true Noir. So what does this make her? Feeling left out? Soldats higher ups get word that Chloe has begun to move so they are going to send their knights to finish them. Mireille and Kirika are ambushed. However those knights are just like any ordinary useless agents. Except they wear some white mask. Quantity over quality. Once all of them are finished, Chloe appears before them to congratulate them for passing the ritual. She is here to give the final guidance to the Manor where the ascension to become Noir will take place. Then it’s like Kirika becomes hypnotized. Chloe asks to hand over her gun in which she did. Then Chloe shoots her.

Episode 21
Mireille checks Kirika’s pulse and good thing is that she is still alive. Chloe explains she did this as the final guidance. The traveller relies upon guidance to advance through the wilderness. If she remembers, she will reach home. Otherwise she will forever be lost in the darkness. She also tells Mireille the truth as she Altena has ordered her to. After all that teasing, you might have already guessed that young Kirika was the one who killed Mireille’s family. She doesn’t believe and what proof does she have? Chloe doesn’t but she was there too and saw it with her own eyes (she looked f*cking awed). The newly born who receive Soldats’ high priest’s blessing at the time of their birth. Those who are chosen from among them go through the trials to become Noir. Mireille also received their blessing but her parents refused to hand her over to Soldats and were executed for that. Mireille can’t take this and runs away. Kirika wakes up and wanders around like a zombie. But when agents come to kill her, she automatically becomes like a killing machine. Finally Mireille and Kirika face off. Kirika admits she was the one who killed her parents and can’t atone her sins. Reminding her of the promise that once the truth becomes clear and to take her life, she wants Mireille to do just that. But Mireille hesitates. She can’t. Kirika is BEGGING for Mireille to shoot her! Mireille says she will keep her promise the next time they meet. WTF. Is this goodbye? This leaves Kirika depressed and frustrated, still begging for Mireille to kill her. She’s gone, sis. And you’re all alone.

Episode 22
Mireille can’t understand it either. Why didn’t she shoot? But looks like Kirika has wondered far enough to reach the Himalayas. Okay, maybe some remote village near the border of Spain and France. She is taken in by a nice old man, Tristan and his wife, Margaret. Seems that they know and expect her. She is then made to go to an old stone monument at the village’s edge. Along the way, it seems everyone acknowledges her and knows who she is. The stone bears the maiden logo of Soldats. One of the young girls resembles a lot like Mireille and this forces Kirika to remember she killed her parents. The young girl coolly says she is not Mireille and also knows who she is. Kirika enters the meeting with Tristan, Thibault the village chief. Also there are agents who want their will to be told to Kirika. However Tristan doesn’t think it is necessary as their beliefs have not changed. He then shoots all the agents dead! The rest of the villagers also kill the remaining agents. He explains those agents are those who oppose Le Grand Retour. This means they don’t want her to see the Lady. As they have lived here together with a great cause, they will continue to do so. Everyone gets down and bow to Kirika. Tristan reveals they are Soldats.

He continues to explain there are many places in the world that does not belong to any country and aren’t on the map. This is one of them and thus lies the Manor. Kirika unconsciously followed the path to the Manor because she is Noir. Beyond here is the sacred grounds and interfering in its affairs is strictly taboo. That’s why those agents were trying to keep her away from this village. The people here are descendants of Soldats. Continuing the roots of Soldats before they went underground and changed into something worldly, Le Grand Retour means returning to the roots of Soldats and the ascension is proof of that. Of course some in Soldats do not desire change as they think Soldats is the world itself. The purpose of this village is to guard the Manor because Soldats are with the truth of the world of man. The Lady also knows this and she is no other than Altena. She has been guarding it for a long time and believes Soldats must regain the hands they have lost. Tristan knows Soldats will make their move tonight. Which is about now because they sent in the army! Margaret leads Kirika out as the villagers fight back. Despite the army have machine guys, fear still runs through them because the villagers do not fear death. Including women and children. Thibault must have got the best position as the sniper but eventually he got bazooka-ed. So the entire village is slaughtered. Kirika cannot understand why this is happening and Margaret believes she understands because she is Noir. Because Soldats also commits sins like men. Sin comes naturally to men. That is the truth of man. After Margaret is killed by the soldiers, Kirika becomes a mean emotionless killing machine. Nobody survives. She continues her journey till she reaches the Manor.

Episode 23
Mireille is visited by a man from Soldats, Breffort. He invites her to join them since she has the qualifications. In actually, some had suggested inviting her earlier along with her partner. Speaking of Kirika, she is already at the Manor and beyond their reach. Altena was the one thoroughly against drawing Mireille into Soldats and was adamant about giving the saplings the greatest trials (all those agents chasing after Kirika in the earlier episodes). Now that 2 of the saplings have gone to Altena, Mireille only remains. That’s why they want to join forces with her. However he gives her a condition. Go to the Manor and kill either Chloe or Kirika. Altena will have no choice but to accept her despite knowing she has been influenced by them. Of course she has no choice but to do this as she knows too much and Soldats will not leave any dangerous element alone. He gives her 2 days to decide. And so this is her answer. She finds out where this guy’s office is, kills all his bodyguards and points her gun at him. She reminds him Soldats killed her parents and have nothing to do with their internal squabble. Soldats will always be her enemy. He dares her to shoot him but doing so will end her career right now. He knew she would come as he wanted her to realize there is no way out of this world. He also reminds her about Claude’s advice not to make the same mistake as her parents. Had Mireille been hand over, her family would have remained in power but they chose the path of destruction instead. He tells her not to make that mistake and think about it thoroughly. After reading Kirika’s letter of gratitude that night, Mireille goes to see Breffort the next day and decides to go to the Manor. But she’s doing it for her own sake and not theirs (they always say that). Soldats will remain her enemy. He asks if she would want to stay an assassin forever. Because she can get more power than her parents ever did. Mireille figured out why her parents didn’t her over to Soldats. Her partner lived with a darkness that was planted in her heart. They didn’t want their daughter to be like that. Although they are Soldats, they are still parents who love their daughter. As for who she will kill when she reaches the Manor, she isn’t sure yet but she wants to see the face of the person who manipulated her parents and partner. Breffort agrees and will email to her the Manor’s location. Whatever the outcome, it will be interesting for Soldats. Finally, Kirika reaches the Manor and meets Altena.

Episode 24
Chloe’s face lights up upon seeing Kirika reaching the Manor. Altena welcomes her as they talk about things. Like how Kirika although wasn’t born here, she spent her important part of life at this place. Altena praises her for showing signs of a great sapling. She also explains the different conditions and situations given to different saplings and the one that overcomes the darkness and it all is worthy to become Noir. Chloe also talks to Kirika and the reason why she decided to become an assassin was that fateful day she saw Kirika gunned down Mireille’s parents in cold blooded fashion. Kirika makes herself at home as Altena puts her to bed. She must be tired from the journey and tomorrow they’ll be busy preparing for the ritual. Next day as Kirika and Chloe have a sword duel, Altena meets her fellow believers who praise her for her valiant efforts. It is now bearing fruit. They also discuss about how Altena’s absolute power will be realized if Le Grand Retour is complete. Altena is willing to do what it takes to accomplish the return of the old Soldats even if something happens to her. The sword fight ends with Kirika the winner. Chloe’s sword broke. When they bath together, Chloe shows the fork she is still keeping. She hopes to invite Mireille over for tea once the ritual is over. However Kirika notes they do not need a third wheel. The ritual continues with Altena returning a gun to Kirika. I don’t know why but she starts having traumatic memories of something similar. Altena gave her that gun in which she used to shoot Mireille’s parents. Kirika then points the gun at Altena, much to Chloe’s horror although Kirika hesitates to shoot. Altena is cool and even wants her to shoot. She talks about darkness, sins and the answer she is looking for is right here. This is the only place she will now peace. Eventually Kirika couldn’t do it. Chloe is so relieved. Don’t forget Mireille. She’s making her way through the barren wastelands.

Episode 25
Before the ritual starts, Chloe and Kirika have the cleanse themselves. In the pool, Chloe kisses Kirika! And then she happily hugs her! Since when did this series turn yuri? After bath, Kirika can sense someone familiar approaching. It’s Mireille. Kirika points her gun. There is no place for her. If this is how it’s going to be, Mireille does the same. Then it begins, a cat and mouse shooting game. I don’t know. Did they turn on the cheat code for unlimited bullets? Just when Kirika thought she had cornered Mireille, the latter throws her timepiece in the air. When they are both at point blank distance, the timepiece lands and breaks. I don’t know why but this causes Kirika to become traumatic thinking about the time she killed Mireille parents. Suddenly the cold hearted killer becomes a trauma girl? Maybe it must be something to do with Mireille’s mom telling her to take care of her daughter. Chloe assists in beating up Mireille while Kirika is in the midst of her trauma. In contrast of Altena’s believe, Kirika also remembers Mireille’s mom saying that although love can hurt, but hatred can never save people. Never. So she’s feeling guilty about it now? Before Chloe can slit Mireille’s throat, Kirika shoots the tip off Chloe’s knife. Chloe is a sad girl. Why? WHY?! Now Chloe is a mad girl and tries to kill Kirika for this betrayal. She sounds like she has been jealous with Kirika living with Mireille the entire time because it could have been her. Kirika pleads her to stop this. Well, Chloe has an idea. She’s going to kill Mireille. She sprints over but Kirika is faster. Kirika stabs Chloe with the fork. Holy sh*t! Guns and knives couldn’t kill but the fork did?! Then it’s like Kirika gets a little poetic. She says Chloe was like a part of her. Because she can kill, it saddens her. Uh… What? After they put lifeless Chloe on the altar, Mireille calls Kirika to come home because it’s not over yet. Kirika is overcome with emotions like an emo girl.

Episode 26
The Soldats higher ups are making their way to the Manor because Altena summoned them. It can’t be help since this is tradition. Damn tradition… Kirika patches up Mireille as they talk about the legend of Noir (a recap to us what it is really about). Then the duo go guns ablazing (actually just a bullet for each enemy would suffice) by killing all the sisters. I thought this scene was funny because the sisters were hiding in the orchard. Then they pop up just to get shot. Just like whack-a-mole, only you shoot them. Real funny. The slaughter continues as they enter the Manor. A follower informs Altena of Chloe’s death and Noir’s betrayal. However it seems Altena has intended for all this to happen. From what I understand, she doesn’t care what happens to Soldats as long as the true Noir revives because Soldats has changed and became corrupted. She then shoots her follower before the duo enter. She is glad they made it this far and will have them begin their final trial. She runs into an underground passage. After a few scenes of war time atrocities, the passage leads them to a room whereby falling down this hole means you’ll be burnt alive by the lava. Altena wants them to finish her and rants about that Noir crap. A lot of people have died by their hands so do not let their deaths go to waste. When she mentions about Mireille’s mom being a sacrificial lamb for this, Mireille gets upset. She feels mad. She feels sad. But she won’t kill her because she is not worth it. Because of this, Altena shoots her but stops short of killing her. She dares Kirika to kill her or she will kill her friend. Kirika has something to say too. Sure, they have sinned and their hands are black. She will accept those sins as Kirika but not as Noir. They are not what she thinks they are. Kirika takes in a bullet meant for Mireille. Don’t worry she didn’t die. Then she pushes Altena into the hole. They’re grabbing on for their lives. Kirika says goodbye. Mireille won’t. Altena drops like a rock. Mireille clings on to Kirika’s hand as tightly as she can. Tears are flowing. Please don’t go. Please. Change of heart? By the time the Soldats higher ups arrive, they see the duo and make way for them. I guess Altena is gone so this means nothing else threatens them anymore unless you want to test the duo’s patience. Although Breffort mentions this is by no means the end, Mireille says that they will live on as they see fit. So what does Mireille want to do now? Go back to Paris and have a nice hot cup of tea.

All Roads Lead To Soldats…
I don’t even know what to say after that kind of ending. I don’t know whether it is good or bad but I know I wasn’t satisfied. So this is the end (or rather beginning) of their journey? After sitting through 26 episodes of drama and gun fights, I thought it would end better this way. So they get to leave just like that? I don’t know. Even weirder was that lava part in the final fight scene. Like as though it is to give us a variety on somebody’s death because all the while we have been seeing people die by gun shots and since Altena is the ‘big boss’, she gets to die differently by falling into the lava. She should have just dropped into it in the first place. Maybe so and perhaps she just wanted to be killed by Noir instead of doing it herself. I don’t know. It just feels twisted. And to think that almost everyone in the world in some ways are related to Soldats, truly you can’t escape from their grasp wherever you go. So can Mireille and Kirika walk away just like that?

Sad to say that despite the series claiming its better parts are the drama rather than focusing on the fight and gunshot scenes, I feel that the action scenes are much more entertaining. Because those drama parts just feel draggy. If I should say so myself, an episode can be finished in half its original duration of 24 minutes. They put in lots of repeated scenes especially of those flashbacks from the past or from previous episodes. And then they prolong certain scenes that really have nothing much ado. This may drag out the drama effects but personally I thought it felt draggy and unnecessary. Therefore personally I would find the action scenes to be a much welcome relief and something to look forward to for each episode. Plus, the first half of the series felt like fillers because we see Noir taking on job requests as they kill different targets while the series drops us tiny bits of pieces about their past and the hidden and future enemy they will be facing.

Although I said that the action parts are entertaining, however I have to note that most of them feel lame. Sure, I can blame old school animation but that is not the point. Especially when Mireille and Kirika are kicking Soldats’ underlings’ ass, those low level agents just feel like they are those low level minions you see in video games. Uh huh. It feels like a video game because Soldats keep unleashing wave after wave of men to go after girls. I don’t know how big Soldats is but it seems they have lots of men at their disposal. Even so, they’re so unskilled. It’s like they exist to get killed. If I should say so myself, they don’t possess the slightest threat to the duo. Some of Noir’s assassination techniques are good but it feels doing them on these low lives is like a big waste. That’s why I said the action is lame. And those bad guys are so unskilled that even if you give them unlimited ammo cheat code, they can never shoot straight. They always miss! Somebody please train them for heaven’s sake! Sometimes when they show Mireille and Kirika doing their makeshift shooting practice in the sewer, is it supposed to justify why their shots always count? Yeah, agents only walk around with guns looking cool and to provide the body count. Besides, I think you’ll lose track doing so. They’ve racked up more body kills than Rambo blitzing his way in the jungles of Vietnam. And thus in every episode, there is guarantee to be deaths. Somebody dies. Whether it is the supporting character for that episode or some unimportant extra. That way, you don’t have to keep up by tying loose ends and care about them anymore.

Even in the penultimate episode where there is nobody around, I thought they were going to break the streak of having no deaths. And then Chloe gets killed. The death combo continues… And expected, Altena also dies. So much so I thought Mireille and Kirika should have just shoot and kill all those Soldats higher ups and save them the trouble of them hunting them down in the future. I mean, I thought the reason they show up was just to get killed. After seeing the pace of this series, this is how I came to think. It’s ‘sad’ that they live ;p. They might not be dangerous now but even they said it themselves, they don’t know what lies in the future. Better be safe than sorry. Besides, weren’t they the ones who made the calls to assassinate them? Oh why oh why didn’t you just kill them and end the series with you both as just the survivors? And if Kirika actually went down with Altena, Mireille will be the only survivor. Good or bad thing? Don’t know. Oh, and here is the oddest part. Despite all the deaths, stabbing and shooting… There is no blood! It’s like their bodies are empty to begin with.

Character wise, I suppose there is some characterization (how deep I don’t know) between Mireille and Kirika, the bonds that they share between them. Since I got caught in the draggy drama, I can’t really tell how much but I’m sure it’s there. I think. It feels weird how their relationship changes of odd partners brought together by fate into close buddies. Because after that few reminders that Mireille would kill Kirika after everything is over, she changed her mind. She wants her. She needs her. If that was a promise, she’d be making the biggest sin of breaking it. Because if Kirika is gone, Mireille would be a lonely soul. And it’s not a good thing for a young lass to be single in Paris even though you’re a hot assassin chick. So perhaps Mireille understood her past and connected the dots that changed her mind in not wanting to kill Kirika.

Kirika on the other hand has this lethargic feel like as though she just woke up from a nap or something thanks to her emotionless behaviour. I don’t remember or know how she got into her amnesiac state in the first place (maybe I wasn’t paying attention) so it felt weird that she started remembering everything the first time Chloe shot her. Like as though it was a seal or something. And when she temporarily turned into a badass version of her emotionless state, it just feels out of place. Her eyes make her look like as though she is a distant relative of the snake. Even weirder how that timepiece broke and she snapped out of her state. From hero to zero. It just feels pathetic. I mean, badass killer girl who needs no one else suddenly becomes emo girl begging for all this to stop? She killed so many in her hands and this? Doesn’t make sense. Well, like she said, they are not what we think they are. Good. Because I don’t want to further think about it. I’m getting a headache in addition to the draggy drama.

Other characters don’t feel much even with Chloe and Altena being the main supporting characters. Altena seems to be cooked up in the Manor which is located in the midst of some barren land. I guess that is why she is so cuckoo because she is cooked up in this place thinking only about returning Noir to its roots. Despite her intentions may sound noble but it still doesn’t solve about the world’s problem like the sin of men. Okay, maybe she’s not God but trying to do this Le Grand Retour already feels like she is playing God. Then there is Chloe who gives an air of mystery when she first appeared. She is more skilful than the duo and has this cunning and confident look in their face whereby it makes you think twice if you want to pull a fast one over her. Then it turns out she was just being obsessed about Kirika and having a crush on her. So when Kirika ‘betrayed’ her love or trust or something (because to me it certainly looked like Kirika wasn’t willing to go down the yuri road. Not at least with her and seemingly with the other woman), she got really mad and met her fate. Other minor characters that only appear for an episode or two also don’t feel much. You’ll forget many of them even if they share a past with the duo like Silvana. Still remember who? Easily forgotten.

The art and drawing looks okay. And as usual since it is old school anime and from that era, there is nothing to shout about or complain. Although there are some dark and gloomy scenes, there are those bright and beautiful sceneries too. Some of the locations are exotic especially in the early part of the series where Noir travel to different places carrying out their mission. But I’m not praising it too much and calling those sceneries as breath taking. Bee Train is the studio that produces this anime. They made animes like Tsubasa Chronicle, Madlax and El Cazador de la Bruja (the latter 2 shows in which along with Noir are considered the girls with guns trilogy with Noir being the first of the instalment and the rest borrowing elements heavily from it).

When I first heard some of the background music in the first few episodes, it dawned to me how similar they sound to Mai-HiME. It is no surprise since both series had their music composed by the same person, Yuki Kajiura. Especially those background music with choir voices driving it, I think those are quite nicely done and could have easily been my favourite if not for this single ‘flaw’. Despite a wide range of variety of background music, they keep repeating and playing a handful of them many times! Spamming already existed this long. It really gets irritating after a while. It made me go, “Oh. This song again. Don’t they have any other songs? I mean, this song is not too bad but, really, again?”. For example. You love fried chicken to the max. How about eating them for every meal and every day for the rest of the year? You get sick of it, right? Otherwise I don’t have any qualms with the music as its varieties are exciting enough. Though, I think I would wait for a long while before hearing them again. However I want to note that there is one background music that stands out. And I mean it in an odd and eyebrow raising way. This music whereby this voice goes “Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta”! Was that even a background music? It made me go WTF! It sounds so out of place! And to play it in this kind of show, it just feels weird. I don’t know I am supposed to laugh or cringe upon hearing this. I know varieties are a good thing. But this one is not one of it. It would be better to leave this one out.

The opening theme, Coppelia No Hitsugi strikes me. Upon hearing it for the first time, I suddenly recognize the singer’s voice as Ali Project! Yes, it is that gothic style of singing. However something doesn’t feel like this is the Ali Project that I used to hear (not that I heard every song from them). Because this song feels a little tamer and toned down if you compared it to their ‘naughtier’ ones like in Kaibutsu Oujo, Rozen Maiden and Linebarrels Of Iron. As for the ending theme, it is Kirei Na Kanjou by Akino Arai. This is a very slow and calming piece, which is somewhat ironic for the pace and genre of this anime. Actually it sounds quite beautiful and nice if you don’t actually try to relate and think that this is the show’s ending theme.

Overall, this anime have both its supporters and detractors. If you love retro animes and the kind of style that they display, I’m sure you’ll be giving double thumbs up and calling this a classic. For those who don’t, the draggy drama and prolonged scenes, lame action scenes (although it can get violent) and the dark and melancholic feel may be a turn off to some. But this series reminds me of the conspiracy that anything and everything you do, either some government division or shady underworld organization that controls the government on puppet strings are always watching. You’re always been watched. That’s why you can never outrun or hide from them. But don’t worry. As long as you got your gun with unlimited ammo, you can easily take them out with your eyes closed. They’ll somehow hit, I tell you.

Akuma No Riddle

December 14, 2014

“What is the secret to success in life?” (Your answer here) –> I guess mine would be hard work and perseverance?

Imagine going to school with a class filled only with assassins. No, I am not talking about a school that trains assassins and your classmates are skilled killers. You are the target of the assassins! Holy cow! That’s like putting a rabbit in den of lions, right? How will you survive? This interesting premise is the reason it got me to notice Akuma no Riddle. A school has this special class with only 13 students. One of them is the target that the rest have to assassinate in this game. The winner will get whatever they want. Yes, anything. A big motivation for our assassins whom of each have their own desires. But in a twist of fate, one of the assassins develops sympathy for the said target and decides to become her protector. Life is more interesting that way. Let the game begin!

Episode 1
A harsh military training for girls. Only Tokaku Azuma passes. Her employer, Kaiba tells her she will be transferring to a new school whereby everyone other than the target are assassins. She is going to win this game and kill the target the fastest because the person who controls Black Class will be rewarded with anything she wishes. Anything. Later Tokaku is given a riddle. What is the world fulfilled with? She answers wrongly. Curse isn’t it. He calls her life a failure and throws her a choice. Kill others and live or let them live but be killed. Or will she try to have both sides live? Tokaku arrives first at Black Class and sees Haru Ichinose reciting the list of all the 13 students that are enrolled here. She is sure to graduate this time. Ataru Mizorogi is their homeroom and biology teacher and he looks like the cheery kind of guy. Ah, youth. He takes attendance (those who turned up anyway) and we get to see some of their b*tchy or creepy personality. Haru tries to be positive and has made straps for everyone to commemorate their friendship. Tokaku reports back the information she has gathered. Nio Hashiri wonders if she wants to team up seeing everybody could guess Haru is the target. Nio wanted to throw her strap away but Tokaku picks it up and keeps it. Ironically she threw away hers. Well, Isuke Inukai also throws away hers to Tokaku. Later Haru and Tokaku hang out. Haru seems to be having fun while emotionless Tokaku just observes her. They are also roommates and Tokaku destroys all the hidden cameras plaguing the room. Tokaku notices a scar on her thigh and wants to see. Haru wouldn’t so Tokaku flips up her skirt! I see white panties! Meanwhile Isuke is roommates with Haruki Sagae. Isuke tries to be dominant but Haruki plays it cool and requests for nail polisher. Because Tokaku was selected to be the dorm leader, she has to go around checking the other students as Haru joins her. They meet the tomboyish Chitaru Namatame and the loli Hitsugi Kirigaya. The pair is always together. Next is Isuke and Haruki but the latter gets a little rough throwing her Pocky sticks at Tokaku in which she dodges. Then there is Shinya Banba whose day time personality is Mahiru. It just gets weirder and weirder, huh? Later that night as they can’t sleep, Tokaku asks her about that riddle. Her answer would be forgiveness. Tokaku doesn’t think that answer would be right and thinks she isn’t the one.

Episode 2
Tokaku is surprised when Kaiba replies the riddle’s answer is correct. Of course he knows this is somebody’s answer and couldn’t possibly come from her. Shiena Kenmochi, Otoya Takechi, Suzu Shutou and Kouko Kaminaga join the class. Kouko takes over as class rep. A big relief for Tokaku? Later Nio informs everyone present that there will be an orientation tonight. It means the target is confirmed. Tokaku is in a dilemma about doing this as she doesn’t care about the reward. Haru continues to be nice to her and since Tokaku is still that robot look, Haru feels the need to smile more or everyone will be angry with her. Isuke comes over to Haru’s room for tea. Tokaku couldn’t care less and leaves. I don’t know if Isuke is lying about her parents both being guys and that she doesn’t even share a single drop of blood with them (duh!) but it is a ploy to distract her since the tea contains some drug. Tokaku learns from Haruki that Isuke is trying to get a head start by killing Haru. Suddenly she cares and rushes back. Nio notes Haru killed everyone in her family and then hints to Haruki that she has a bunch of siblings. Haruki slaps her and warns never to talk about her family. I don’t know how Isuke is planning to kill Haru but she strips her clothes to see the scars all over her body. I don’t know why she didn’t kill faster because Tokaku is back and the fight begins. Tokaku is about to kill Isuke but she hesitates, allowing her counter attack. Isuke mocks her she has not killed before and leaves. Tokaku remembers being told if she ever felt like killing someone, recall this small shrine and she won’t because somebody there is watching her. She felt it was a curse.

Tokaku wakes up to find Haru by her side. How is she still awake after the drug? As explained, her body is resistant to drugs and was half awake the entire time. She wonders why Tokaku saved her as she knows everyone in Black Class is trying to kill her. Is this some sort of strategy? She will prove she will graduate from here. She narrates about her past that her existence was considered troublesome. Her entire family died just to keep her alive therefore her life doesn’t belong to just herself but everyone who protected it. Especially her mom who is always in her heart. This is her last trial and will do whatever it takes not to lose and survive. She was not born to die but to live. Nio initiates the secret meeting. She is the judge-cum-referee of Black Class. She goes over some of the rules. Haru is the target and the fastest one who kills her wins and will grant her whatever wish. People who aren’t part of Black Class must not be involved such as Mizorogi. Those who fail to assassinate or violate the rules will immediately drop out. Everyone is given some card vote in which they can’t cancel. To assassinate Haru, they must give her an advanced warning and failure to kill her within 48 hours after that is considered a failure. Teaming up with someone is also okay. Tokaku is last to arrive. Nio hands her the card but she shreds it. She will become Haru’s protector and won’t let anyone lay a hand on her. She finally answers Haru’s question why she saved her. Because she is siding with her.

Episode 3
Nio calls the big boss to confirm and she allows this exception. Takechi accidentally smashes Shiena’s glasses instead of the ringing alarm clock. Shiena had spares but they’re all missing. Looks like she’ll need to go get new ones. Takechi is going to make her first move. Finally the last student Sumireko Hanabusa attends Black Class but why bring her classy big desk? Rich girls… Haru sees the advanced warning and becomes uneasy although she acts like nothing when Tokaku asks. Nobody pays attention to Mizorogi’s class in the greenhouse. Takechi seems prefer chatting with Haru and they’re getting closer by the minute. Because coincidentally Takechi shares the same likes with her and their birthday is just a day apart. Or could this be just some psychological trick to get her guard down because you tend to feel closer with people who have a lot in common. Tokaku warns Haru of this but she believes all Takechi wants is to be her friend. Naïve? She remains positive that everyone becomes her friend, they all can graduate together and nobody has to die. Nio asks Takechi about the reward she wants. Serial killing insurance. Huh? She wants to kill without having to worry about the consequences. It is like having immunity when she kills and the police can’t do anything about it. Kill in peace? I guess Tokaku hasn’t got a clue. She thinks Haru hasn’t got an advanced warning and should be fine. Feeling something amiss, she goes to search Haru’s bag and then sees the notice. Oh sh*t.

So when Takechi talks to Haru alone in the park, she lies about Shiena being the killer and that she broke her glasses so she couldn’t see. That should keep her safe. She also wants to protect her. How does stuffing the bouquet of flowers into her face constitute to protecting her? It doesn’t. Then Tokaku fell for the oldest trick in the book when Takechi tells her where Haru’s whereabouts is but gets locked in the room. There’s the air vent to climb through. Meanwhile the other girls taking a bath discuss about Takechi. It seems everyone but Shutou doesn’t know about Takechi’s true identity. She is a serial killer who kills others to get her sexual pleasure. Shiena is starting to quiver because her roommate is a serial killer. Tokaku drops down from the air vent looking for Shiena but she mentions it was Takechi who sent the notice. There is plenty of time, the reason Takechi is taking her time to kill Haru. She is going to enjoy torturing her and cuts her scar lines. Let’s start with the thigh. Tokaku calls to interrupt so Takechi lets her hear Haru’s screams. Haru realizes they are in the greenhouse thanks to the bird’s chip in the background. But Haru is no pushover. She kicks Takechi away and frees herself. Tokaku and crazy Takechi battle it out. The former is going to win but Haru knocks her out. Tokaku bandages her thigh as Haru thanks her. When Takechi wakes up, Nio is by her side and announces she has lost since 48 hours have passed. Takechi pleads for another chance. She doesn’t care about the reward but just wants to kill the b*tch. No can’t do. Rules are rules. In that case, Takechi is going to kill her. However she saw something that scares the sh*t out of her. Next day, Mizorogi sadly announces Takechi’s sudden transfer out of this class on short notice.

Episode 4
Haru runs into trouble studying for the midterm exams. Kouko helps her out and Haru is happy to see her having the strap. Haru sees Chitaru and Hitsugi and wonders why they are always holding hands. So that Hitsugi won’t get lost. Chitaru adds she is not aiming for Haru and is here for a different reason. Nio tells Haru and Tokaku about the seven mysteries of this school. One of them includes a secret room in the library that contains a forbidden book that if you write your name on its card, your happiness is guaranteed. Interested? When they return to their room, Haru sees the advanced notice. Tokaku diffuses a bomb set in the fridge and a hidden one in a bottle. Looks like Kouko’s plan isn’t going too well. As she takes a shower, she remembers hailing from an orphanage that is actually an international assassin training organization. Because Kouko was clumsy, the rest don’t think she is fit for this job. Even her instructor, Irena doesn’t think so. One day while she is in a mission fixing a bomb underneath her car, Irena talks to her about death not being the end of life but the completion of life. Minutes later, the bomb went off earlier then it should and Irena was killed. Kouko was reprimanded for her failure for it almost exposed their organization. She pleaded for another chance but there won’t be another next time. Maybe she is not cut out to be an assassin after all. That is why this time she must not fail. As Haru still wants to look for the forbidden book, they sneak into the library to find the hidden room. Thanks to Tokaku having smelling a different scent, they find the secret room and search for the book. Haru sees that strap and in her curiosity tries to pull it. Tokaku was fast enough to shield her from the bomb. She sees Kouko trying to shoot them but missed. Tokaku goes after her and Kouko is clumsy dropping her guns or loading her gun. She doesn’t look like she could handle the knife well too. Kouko mentions her wish is to quit being an assassin. Tokaku finds it ironic because she is going to kill someone and wash her hands off it. Kouko breaks down after she is defeated and laments she is no good after all. Next day when Mizorogi hands back all their test papers, seems Haru is the class’ top scorer! Actually Kouko is the top scorer with near perfect marks. It is just too bad as she has transferred out. Haru writes Kouko’s name on the card hoping she would be happy.

Episode 5
Mizorogi is fired up for his class to do Romeo and Juliet for the cultural festival. Chitaru and Hitsugi are casted as the main characters and Shiena is on fire being the director. Or is she? When Haru and Tokaku are in the bath, Haruki comes in and sees Haru’s body scars. She mocks her how does it feel to have people die for her and how could she carry on living with a smile. Haru plays it cool and she will continue to smile. In that case if Tokaku dies, she’ll continue to smile, right? Later Tokaku gets mad for Haru for not being mad. What…? Nio reveals to Haru that there were 2 killer clans that ruled this country in darkness. The Azuma of the East and Kuzunoha of the West were always at each other’s throats. Tokaku interrupts and reminds Haru if she wants to know something, ask her directly. So this is briefly her family structure. Her mom died shortly after her birth and was looked after by grandma. She never knew her dad and has no other encumbrances. Haruki talks to Tokaku that Haru could have been in the other class. In fact none of them wanted to be here. Such is fate. She wants to free Haru tonight so if she is interested, come meet her here. Isuke sees a picture of Haruki’s orphanage family and realizes this is her reason. She gives her ‘advice’ that all those unnecessary stuffs should be rid off and everyone should be killed. That’s how she lived her life. Haruki ignores her. Haru goes to the hall as Tokaku wanted to talk to her. Unfortunately this is a setup by Haruki. She gives Haru her advance notice and then strangles her with her wire! So much about the warning being in advance. Luckily Tokaku didn’t trust Haruki and jumps into the scene to save Haru. Yeah. After all that has happened, you think she should be by her side 24/7. Tokaku and Haruki slug it out but the former is superior. Now that it boils down to this, there is only one choice left for Haruki for freedom. She pulls a string that collapses the entire truss on the ceiling. Seems prior to this, she has made a deal with Nio that if she dies, her family will get the reward. Thanks to the gaps, Tokaku and Haru lives. Though the truss crushed Haruki, she is still alive and no fatal injuries. She admits her loss and Haru even gives her advice that being alive means she has been forgiven that she is here. Either way, Haruki believes she needs to try her best. And so this means Haruki is transferred out but Mizorogi is one stressed guy. The hall is in a mess… Tokaku wonders if Haru could still continue to forgive even if the entire world wishes death on her. She will. As long as they reflect on their actions, she will forgive them every time.

Episode 6
Chitaru tells Hitsugi that her goal is to look for some poison killer called Angel Trumpet. Hitsugi wants to help her. The night before the play, Haru is frantically looking for her script. With Tokaku they go to the stage to search for it. Little do they know it is in the hands of Shiena as she slips her advanced warning. However Hitsugi won’t allow that and shoots her with her poison needles. Haru and Tokaku see this. Although they are saved from Shiena’s warning, Hitsugi hands over hers. Although Shiena is alive, she is hospitalized and is very sick as she got infected by the poison. Safe to say, she is out of the running. Chitaru thinks Tokaku did her in. Tokaku warns Haru that she shouldn’t eat anything today since Hitsugi is a poison master. Hitsugi asks Chitaru why she wants to find Angel Trumpet. Seems her teacher’s daughter was killed by her and it is ironic that she is chasing a killer whom she has never seen her face. As the play starts, Tokaku realizes all the sword props are laced with poison. Chitaru thinks Haru is Angel Trumpet and Hitsugi dealt with Shiena for her sake. Then she goes to confront Tokaku and seeing the poisoned swords, she is now convinced Haru is Angel Trumpet. I don’t know why the heck they need to go on stage to begin their confrontation but everyone thinks this is part of the play. Tokaku puts Haru in Mizorogi’s care before the girls settle their sword fight outside. Chitaru doesn’t believe Tokaku’s words that Hitsugi is the culprit. But when the perpetrator herself comes to admit it, so now do you believe? Therefore she has no reason to fight Tokaku. Her plan is to have Haru die on stage just like how her character dies in the play. So they’re going back to the play? Yeah. Chitaru is now in a dilemma. The closest person to her is the real enemy. Can she fulfil her mission? In the final scene, Chitaru still hesitates to stab Hitsugi with the dagger. Hitsugi is okay for her being killed and helps push her hand into her heart. Nio informs that Hitsugi’s wish is to leave this place with her after everything was over. She was her most desired one. Chitaru felt bad that she never understood Hitsugi at all. She drinks the poison and dies by her side. And the crowd thinks this touching scene was so damn emotional and good.

Episode 7
Shutou brings the girls to an indoor pool within the school grounds. As they choose their swimsuits, Tokaku sees the advanced warning and Shutou immediately puts a choker on Haru’s neck. It contains a bomb that will blow her head off if tampered. Since Shutou isn’t physically strong, she is going to play a game. They need to find 4 cards with numbers on it as the password to unlock the bomb. They have until midnight or else Haru’s head will explode. Oh, they have only 3 tries too. The clues are written in the notice. So as the duo go around finding the cards, the other girls play watermelon smashing. This has Tokaku noting it similar to the clue and smashing it reveals a 7 of diamonds (how the heck did she put in the watermelon so perfectly?). Because the rest note that they could figure out the other numbers, Tokaku also figured it out and takes Shutou’s deck of cards. The missing numbers correspond to the numbers, right? All 7s are missing. But when she keys in, it is wrong. Shutou says that is just a dummy. Back to square one. Mizorogi who is bent on not letting more girls transfer out stumbles upon something on Shutou. Tokaku finds a joker (worth as zero) in the flood lights. Then with the next clue, she finds the ace of spade in the same deck of cards. Cleverly hidden.

The last one is in the water but then Mizorogi comes by to give Shutou a surprise birthday call! Nio notes if Shutou is successful, she can get her reward as a birthday present. What is her wish? To age normally and die. Wait a minute. Okay, so she wants to grow old but isn’t it okay to die young? The way she puts it sounds like she is an immortal. Maybe she is… Because here is her story. Her body suffers from an illness that doesn’t age. Long ago she had someone precious to her. She was a year younger and their birthday is only a day apart. She would age a year before he’d catch up. Because she doesn’t age, he grew older, became an adult and fell in love with another woman. Heartbroken Shutou was left behind. Midnight is drawing near and Tokaku is looking into anything water. I can’t believe she missed this blind spot of the water slide. When she gets in, she gets locked in a cage. At the end of the ride, the cage sinks to the bottom. While running out of air and at the bottom of the floor, she can only pick the card or the key to free herself. (I can’t believe she didn’t look at the floor of this section). Tokaku is willing to sacrifice herself but Haru dives down to give her some air. Masked as a yuri kiss?! She then uses the key to free her. Now they have to guess the last number. 7, 0, 4 and what number… And what combination too? Isuke keys in her lucky number and got it wrong! One chance left. Tokaku then realizes since today is Shutou’s birthday, 14th July so the code must be 0714. However Haru stops her. She believes the last digit is not 4 but 5 because it is the birthday of her beloved. It works! The bomb comes off and Haru hugs Tokaku. Shutou admits she has lost and leaves. Nio asks her age but she doesn’t remember.

Episode 8
Isuke calls her ‘papa’ who is busy killing people. He feels lonely and hopes she would come back. Sure. With lots of souvenirs too. Nio talks to the chairwoman, Yuri Meichi who is enjoying every bit that has happened. It reminded her of her own days in Black Class in which she took only 6 days to complete. Tokaku and Haru chance upon Shinya in the bath so the latter talks about Mahiru locking up herself this whole time and doesn’t know how to live a normal life. From the way she says it, Tokaku could guess she is the next one. Shinya and Mahiru are like having some sort of ‘discussion’. Mahiru is indecisive about some relic that she is close to getting her hands on so Shinya won’t let her wait anymore. Since a storm is coming, Nio tries to persuade Haru to do kimodameshi but Tokaku won’t allow it so Nio hints something about Tokaku’s past that may resemble closely to some cursed occult. As the duo leave, the wind brings in an advanced notice from Mahiru. Tokaku takes Haru and run but Isuke attacks them. Tokaku got a little injured as she reminds her not sending an advanced letter is against the rules. Isuke is sure Haru already got it. Tokaku throws mud in her face to make their escape. She realizes the note was from Isuke since there are no rules stating about putting your name on it. Isuke remembers Esuke killed her real parents because they tried to kill her he adopted her and in exchange for taking care of her, he wants her to assist and succeed him in his assassin job. Tokaku locks Haru in a science lab and tells her to stay put before rushing off to settle things with Isuke. The dangerous women meet again and another knife battle takes place. Isuke is not afraid of her and knows her moves. Because she knows she hesitates and stops when she is about to kill. Everyone else is on their guard just because she carries the Azuma name but imagine if they knew about this, it would have changed everything. Haru is sitting nicely in the lab when suddenly a few knocks are heard on the door. Can’t get through? Smash it with a hammer! Yeah. Here is Shinya with her advanced notice. She’s crazy. Let’s get this party started! Isuke points out Shinya is a bit early and that look on Tokaku’s face that she made the biggest mistake of leaving Haru alone. I knew this would come. I mean, how could she even think of leaving Haru alone? Couldn’t she just stay and guard Haru by her side?

Episode 9
When Tokaku was born, she was named so by grandma as it means impossible. Because those who see her will fear her and think it will be impossible to best her. But Tokaku’s mom didn’t want her to become an assassin and entrusted her to her sister, Mako who told Tokaku about looking at that shrine so she won’t be able to kill. Isuke mentions about the deal with Shinya. The latter gets to play around with Haru all she wants while she takes out Tokaku. She thinks that trying to protect Haru is just a ploy to hide that she can’t kill. So if she kills her, she’ll be like the best, right? After all that close quarter combat, Tokaku uses her hidden taser in her shoes to stun and weaken her and make her way to Haru. She doesn’t find her in the lab and is worried. Isuke is back up and fights her again. Then she pushes Tokaku out the window. Can anybody survive that fall? Well… Meanwhile Haru isn’t going to be a damsel in distress. She does a good job avoiding Shinya’s hammering (literally), throws her handphone in her head for distraction, blasts the fire extinguisher in her face and while she is hiding in the toilet and Shinya come knocking down doors, Haru slams it in her face when she reaches her cubicle. Then in the auditorium, Shinya thought she had her cornered when the projector light flashes into her face. This bring backs traumatic memories (something about her being in child porn and imprisonment) and this sends her into vegetative state. Haru is relived Tokaku saved her but it’s not. It’s Isuke. You know what this means. Tokaku’s dead. At least that is what Isuke tells her after she disposes off Shinya.

More Tokaku flashback as we see Mako trying to take Tokaku and run. She regretted hesitating and should have done so earlier. However grandma stood in their way and killed Mako. In her dying breath, she tells Tokaku that she and her sister will always be watching her from that place. Tokaku sees a vision of Mako. She realizes she has always been the one calling and protecting her. Since she has someone to protect now, she’ll be fine. She promises to go there once she has time. It feels like Tokaku has been freed. See? She didn’t die from that fall after all. Haru is in shock believing Tokaku is dead but Isuke won’t get to kill her since a knife suddenly pierces her hand. Couldn’t believe Tokaku is still alive, could you? Tokaku has changed. The look in her eyes feels like she is now able to kill without hesitation. She could even dodge bullets! Easily taking her down, Tokaku won’t kill her but knocks her out. Haru gets emotional since it is a big relief that she is still alive. Tokaku now believes it is not a curse. She always thought bearing the thought of the murder is not a joke. The weight of it can’t be endured. She was wrong. She was being protected all this time and thanks to Haru, she finally noticed it. Hanabusa leaves her flowers for her defeated girls and commends them for their bravery.

Episode 10
Mizorogi must be so depressed that he makes his class a self study session. He goes to see the Yuri and blames himself for not being an effective teacher. On the contrary, she praises him for being the perfect teacher. He’s so happy… So gullible… Now that there is 1 left, Tokaku is on her guard. But Hanabusa isn’t going to give her advance warning and gives Haru an invitation to her tea party. Meanwhile Takechi has escaped her facility and is going to get her revenge on Haru. She is already in the school grounds but bumps into Hanabusa. She is going to kill her too but Hanabusa stops her scissors and crushes it with her bare hands! She will invite her to the tea party as well. Haru and Tokaku arrive at the rooftop. The entire place has been remodelled with that elegant and posh feel since Hanabusa’s family bought it. To their surprise, the other girls except Nio are there too. Actually they are Marionettes. Takechi is the only other real guest but she is in a strait jacket. Haru wants to know what Hanabusa’s wish is and could help grant it. Hanabusa reveals that her family is the same as hers. She has also been targeted many times and just like Haru, she survived. She believes she is the strongest and will defeat her and let everyone know that. That is her wish. The place is filled with weapons so take your pick. The marionettes start attacking and Tokaku is busy shooting them down while Hanabusa activates a bulletproof glass so she could fight Haru unhindered. However Tokaku whips Hanabusa and drags her to her side in time. Looks like she’ll have to take care of her first. Hanabusa reveals her true body. Her limbs are robotic and this makes her strong and able to fit any weapon as her arms. Takechi manages to free herself and joins in on the action but is still no match. When Nio comes in, Takechi starts sweating in her pants when this monster tells her to go home and not interfere. Hanabusa questions Tokaku’s perseverance to fight. It is because she will protect Haru even if it costs her life. Hanabusa notes that she is not aware that Haru is the queen bee. Eventually Tokaku gets pinned down by a chandelier. To prevent her from being killed, Haru takes a bazooka and blows a hole in the wall to escape. Hanabusa won’t let her escape and goes after her. She gets tricked into that elevator bomb ruse but she manages to climb back up. Now she is mad. Cornering Haru at the rooftop, she shoots her strings but gets entangled in the rail. Haru throws her down and dives along. Then she keeps stomping on her head so her mechanical hand will come loose and it’s free fall all the way. Seriously. It was that loose? Oh, she lost. Haru goes back to free Tokaku as the latter asks about the queen bee thing. Haru apologizes and will tell her when the time is right.

Episode 11
A lesson about bees. How tragic. Can’t blame Mizorogi for feeling depressed despite putting a brave face to trudge on. There are only 3 students left in Black Class. Nio then announces there will be an orientation for the truth behind Black Class tonight and those interested should come. Since there is nobody left to kill Haru, Tokaku doesn’t hang around her as often. Haru and Tokaku head for the orientation. Nio introduces Yuri to them. She begins by explaining about a certain trial when people reach certain age to be acknowledged as part of society. The Black Class was not created to kill Haru. Instead it was for determining if Haru can survive against 12 assassins and has what it takes to shoulder the future of the clan. There are many families and branches in this world that can trace their blood back to one clan. All of them are in control and influence of everything in this world. A Primer is a person born with special charismatic ability in the clan and is able to charm and control people unconsciously to their heart’s content. The more in danger those people are, the more the Primer manifests its finest. That is why lives of the women of the clan are constantly targeted from birth. She congratulates Haru’s fine Primer power but whether or not she does it intentionally she doesn’t know. That is why they thought she had controlled Tokaku to become her protector. Haru denies this and just wanted this trial to end and live normally. How would she explain surviving up to this point and all those who died for her? The fact she survived means she is special. Haru won’t hear of this anymore and leaves. Yuri acknowledges Tokaku as the victor and will grant her wish. She can take her time.

Back at the room, Haru talks to Tokaku that she believes she doesn’t have such power as her family is at the bottom of the clan. But Tokaku is suspicious. Could it be that she unconsciously made Tokaku her bodyguard? Therefore there was no need to control everyone else as she already controlled her to protect her. Still denying that? Then show proof. None? I guess that’s it. Tokaku then talks to Kaiba. He doesn’t give her any answers. In fact he tells her all the riddles he gave her had no correct answer. If there is, it can only be inside of her. So be sure to dig and think deep. So she thinks hard and doesn’t even know why she decided to protect Haru. There is no proof. Could it be another answerless riddle? Haru wants Nio to let her see Yuri. She doesn’t want to acknowledge that she is part of the clan. Yuri wonders if all those dead people will agree to it. She has Nio bring Haru to a graveyard. It has no bodies or bones but only names of those who died. Originally this place was a graveyard and the school was subsequently built. That’s because the laughter of school children will never stop and this somewhat appeases the soul of the dead. Nio reveals that she was born with some special power and no relatives. Yuri saved her. She wants Haru to remember that people may sometimes be saved by the power of the clan. Haru looks around and finds the grave of her family. Suddenly Tokaku comes in. With a sword. She has been thinking a lot. Up to now she felt like an ordered doll merely to manage the trial. She never realized that till she met her and the reason she lived through till today. Haru taught her everything and that is why she is grateful and happy they met. That’s why she has no choice but to do this. She shows her advance notice. That’s some serious gratitude.

Episode 12
Haru can’t believe over this betrayal. Well, believe it. She doesn’t wish for this to happen but Tokaku is serious. Here’s a warning slice. The next one will kill her if not for a gunshot interrupting. Hey… Another Tokaku?! She brings Haru and run while explaining that Tokaku is actually Nio in disguise. As she once said about the Azuma and Kuzunoha clans, while Azuma specialize in combat and assassination techniques, the Kuzunoha clan are more towards mystic arts like hypnotism. Nio is from this clan. Once Black Class ends, she’ll betray it and kill Haru. Haru doesn’t know if her subconscious made Tokaku protect her. Even so, Tokaku has obtained something irreplaceable in her heart. Those feelings has guided her here is everything to her. Nio catches up and attack. Oh no. Two Tokakus. How can I tell which is the real one? Well, from the imposter’s rational, she wants to kill Haru for her sake. Something like it’s the Primer’s fault. I don’t know. I’m confused. Does she wants to prove something about her Primer effects and Haru’s true wish is to kill? The imposter loses but won’t give up in killing Haru. Tokaku stabs her. And then… Haru picks up the knife and charges straight for Tokaku. She’s thankful about this and that and loves her, blah, blah, blah… That’s why she won’t die. Maybe she has to eat her words since Tokaku stabs her! She considers their family the same. Once Haru is gone, Tokaku puts up an emotional look more than all the emotions she has combined in this entire series. Oh wait. Did she ever? Nio laments her ruined plan of killing Haru in her looks because she thought it would be fun. In the end, they’re just the same. They’re only competent in killing. Yuri congratulates Tokaku for being the true winner of Black Class and will grant her any reward. Perhaps she is too stunned to speak. Maybe another time when she is ready. Tokaku indeed does have a wish but is sad it won’t come true anymore.

It seems Haru is alive and is the only sole survivor of Black Class! Mizorogi hands her the graduation certificate. The others also have their certificates and Haru will personally deliver to them if she meets them again. Nio is also alive and is seen talking to Yuri. They discuss that Haru is alive thanks to the titanium ribs she has. The knife missed her heart by inches. We are also given a short glimpse of the other girls from Black Class. All of them live. Yes, all of them are still alive. Hanabusa is back in her mansion thinking of taking up cooking. Shutou pays her last respects to her beloved one at the grave. Kouko makes a daring move by running away from her orphanage and kills all the nuns in pursue of her. Now she looks so badass. Haruki is working at a construction site while Takechi is on her best behaviour picking weeds in her detention facility. Wow. It’s like she turned over a new leaf and becoming a good girl. Isuke is sunbathing at the beach with Esuke and is pouting because this entire beach could have been theirs. Kirigaya sits by Chitaru’s side at the hospital. Shiena is a hacker and Mahiru is admiring the city view and assures Shinya she’ll be fine on her own. Lastly, Haru goes to meet up with Tokaku who is waiting for her at the school gates. Kaiba finally seems impressed with whatever answer Tokaku replied to his riddle.

Who’s Next?
Hey wait a minute. So that’s it? What the heck is this happy ending? Okay, maybe I am to be blamed for expecting something dark because for the entire series, everything was just having that dark feel and therefore I wasn’t putting any expectations on some bright happy ending. Because I really thought that some of them had died for good and what do you know? They’re not! Bummer. And when you think about this show having cute high school girls as assassins suddenly to have somewhat a blissful life in the end, it just feels WTF and doesn’t match. So there are a handful of things that I don’t get really. Did Black Class achieve its goal to make Haru the next head of clan? From the way things ended, Haru is happier being normal friends with Tokaku. And what was Tokaku’s wish? I am guessing to bring Haru back or have a normal life. Well, it does seem granted in that case. And if all the assassins survived, then it could be the first time that the graveyard will not engrave somebody’s name who have died for Haru in this trial, right? If only the previous trials were like that.

Remember this old song you used to sing in kindergarten? One little, two, little, three little Indians… Ten little Indian boys. Uh huh. That is how I feel about this entire anime. You get the feeling that one by one the assassins will be picked off because if Haru and Tokaku gets killed, then it is game over. Hardly anything exciting, right? So the ‘exciting’ part for me was to guess which girl will go next. I have to be quick and do it at the start of the anime because it doesn’t take too long before she gives her advance notice and let the drama-cum-game begins. And when it is over, I’ll begin to ponder, who’s next?

One of the biggest problems of this show is that there is lack of depth within the characters especially the assassins. Although the mid-intermission has a few notes of additional information and background about the assassin in focus, it does little to help understand them better. Because just like I said, they’re playing Ten Little Indians and after they have been picked off, you won’t really here of them again and the last episode showing them is just to give us a sense of closure. Even during their episode in focus, their background and story behind them doesn’t feel deep. A bit superficial and is brought to like just because they are the ‘star’ in that episode. More like out of convenience to drag on the story. It hardly impacts anything because at the end of the day, they lose and it doesn’t matter. She goes out, another one comes in. Rinse and repeat till none are left. The assassin who suffers most and greatly from this is Shiena. She doesn’t even get a chance to shine and she is out. You don’t really know much about her (till the last episode of course but then again, does it really matter?) and she became a sacrificial lamb as part of the series to stay fresh. Because having an assassin out per episode feels boring. So for that episode, we have 3 assassins going out! Wow. So if I do add up my maths right, they’ll end the series with almost the same number of survivors.

At most times Haru seems like the damsel in distress and relying on Tokaku to protect her. My guess that her helplessness stems from her deep desire to not fight and kill. Because when she is cornered as seen with her case with Shinya, she can be quite innovative letting her survival instincts kick in. So it’s like she only resorts to this as a last measure. However I think even without Tokaku’s help, Haru would have survived all the assassination attempts. The scars all over her body is a hint that indicates she has undergone some sort of hideous surgery and experiment or each scar serves as a reminder that she survived some sort of attack. Another big hint was in the initial episode whereby Isuke tried to poison her and that failed attempt has her note her body is resistant to poison and drugs. That should give us a big hint that she isn’t easily killed. We might not have guessed the titanium rib cage but there is a feeling she won’t die that easily. She’s a survivor after all. Otherwise she would have been long been disposed of.

As for Tokaku, for a big part of the series she is like having this dilemma and thinking about stuffs and protecting Haru despite she has this monotonous look on her face that would indicate to us normal people that her facial muscle must have been broken. Her past and her clan as well as the rival clan prove interesting but too bad and like I have said, this series suffers a lot in developing the characters and fleshing them out. So we’ve been given the big teaser of some shrine that Tokaku can’t kill because of this mindset that Mako ‘programmed’ her. And once the shackles go off, she got this killer looks but still, she hasn’t made her first killing because everyone in the end still lives, right? And then when she finally shows her emotions, it was like as though she has finally accepted her friendship with Haru or something like that. In that sense, would she be called a failure? What will the clan think of her?

I don’t know why everyone doesn’t consider Nio as part of the assassin because they see her as the judge. Even Haru and Tokaku don’t really see her as a threat. Can’t she hold both positions? I mean, then it would have been redundant to announce that there are 12 assassins and a target, right? Do your maths right. If Nio was really only an observer, they would have clearly state 11 assassins, a target and a judge. And with Tokaku’s defection, make that 10 assassins, a bodyguard, a target and a judge. I suppose everybody’s assumption of this is to make us forget that Nio is an assassin so as to have this surprise final episode. And here I was pondering why Black Class is already over when Nio hasn’t even made her move yet and could it be that she is really a judge? Then this surprise of her disguising as Tokaku to kill Haru. Although I didn’t guess it was her in that disguise, but I wasn’t surprised either when it was supposed to be her. I mean, who is left, right? Yeah. Who’s next?

Kaiba’s role feels like a big mystery. He throws Tokaku a lot of riddles that she couldn’t answer. Then it might be that he is just trolling since the riddles don’t really have an answer. Probably like he hinted, he wanted her to think for herself and that this world doesn’t have answers that are clear cut, black and white. She determines the answers herself. Mizorogi feels like the most redundant character ever. Even putting a nameless teacher or even a faceless one, I don’t think it would change the series very much. His minimal role feels so minimal and the most ‘significant’ one was that cameo to remind about Shutou’s birthday and thus giving the pair some sort of hint. That’s about it and so much for this guy. And so his role overall has become somewhat a side comic relief because he is just too cheery and passionate in teaching this special class. Because he should have suspected something amiss when the class only has 13 girls and one by one they keep transferring away. So what if he falls into depression? Not like he could do anything about it. That’s why I say his role feels somewhat redundant. It’s a good thing Haru is left. One is better than none. I wonder if he would go insane and quit teaching altogether if Black Class had zero students.

The action part feels okay and some were thrilling enough but overall it just does sufficient for an anime about girls trying to kill their target. Of course they had to lay down certain rules since it would be a bad idea if all the assassins have the same idea and decide to go first. It is not impossible as seen in Isuke and Shinya’s case. If everybody shows their advance notice at the same time, it will be the biggest brawl and messy blood fest and it will end before you even know it. So that is why some of the assassins that do not have high fighting capabilities instead use mind games and puzzle, which actually brings a refreshing pace to the series. There are many ways to go about killing your target. So it sometimes feel funny to see one go first while the rest wait and watch like as though they’re taking turns, which is exactly it. And once more it gives rise to “Who’s next?”.

The yuri part feels fleeting. Except for that underwater pool scene where Haru and Tokaku kissed, other scenes won’t even have you think this would amount to yuri despite the both of them hang out together most of the time. Not even that final episode whereby Haru charged towards Tokaku to kill her and I thought they seemingly kissed (because Haru confessed she loved her after thinking back all the ‘good times’ she was being protected with). I guess not. At that angle it certainly looked like it. Thus their relationship feels more like the protector and the protected like as we are told. Because it would be odd to see something yuri happening between them while knowing there are other girls trying to kill Haru. Yeah. Such yuri romance would feel out of place. Even Chitaru and Kirigaya had more of a yuri feel than them despite they make lesser appearance.

The art and drawing seems a little gritty and dark. While the girls may look like cuties whom normal guys won’t even think that they are skilled assassins beneath that cute looks, certain angles and moments you can see their scary and crazy assassin face. Some of the scenes may not be palatable especially with Haru’s hideous scars all over her body, it makes it feel like she is some sort of Frankenstein model put together. So I doubt you want to see her in the skin or in her undies in a handful of fanservice scenes. Diomedea produces this series and it is rare for them to make such dark animes as mostly they produce moe and cute animes like Shinryaku! Ika Musume, Asatortte No Omocha, Kodomo No Jikan, Nogizaka Haruka No Himitsu, Nagasarete Airantou and Chocotto Sister. Perhaps the exception is Bokurano but I didn’t see that anime.

The opening theme is Soushou Innocence by Maaya Uchida. It is the kind of hard rock music that gets you into the pace of this anime. Although personally this kind of music isn’t my type. As there are unique assassins in the class, there are also different ending themes for each episode, each mirroring the personality of the assassin in focus of that episode. Although they are all rock based, some of them rock harder than others (the ending themes of Tokaku, Takechi, Haruki and Hanabusa in particular). Isuke’s ending theme feels like it has a bit of techno in it while Kirigaya and Chitaru’s ending theme is the only duet. Haru’s theme is the only that feels calming and a bit like anime pop although it is still slow rock. The only assassin who doesn’t get her own ending theme is Shiena. Yeah, so poor that girl since she got kicked out before she even got started that the producers probably thought she didn’t deserve to have her own ending theme. That’s because the song for the last episode has all of them singing in it! One big girl group? Like having AKB48, assassin version. Yeah, I guess this is the only song where Shiena gets to sing and be part of. So don’t be sad, we haven’t forgotten about you entirely. Unfortunately none of the songs stick in my head because they only appear for one episode. I know I can go hear it again but you know, if it was that good I would have.

Overall, this series falls short in what matters most. Despite having a wide range of characters, each with a big potential for their own story, the pace of the story killed it off (pun intended). Even if they double the number of episodes and extend it for another season, it may not do a good job too because you will have the typical one episode expanded for flashback and another episode for the fight. That will be boring and draggy for a series considered to be fast paced. And having a dozen episodes itself has already made it suffer from this issue. That’s why it is in a catch-22 situation. So if you’re not in for the story, just stay for the action and see what different girls can do. Because I know having a class full of assassin girls is not my kind of harem. Would I be willing to die for them? Heck, don’t want to be living the yandere route 12 times over! That is what you call femme fatale.

P/S: “What is the secret to success in life?” (Your answer here) –> Keep it a secret from others!

Kill Me Baby OVA

January 10, 2014

Woah! I thought it died but it came back! What a pleasant surprise! I thought I had seen the last of this series since it last aired in 2012 and it never occurred to me that an OVA was made more than a year later. Thus it was such a pleasant surprise to me that Kill Me Baby OVA is back with a vengeance despite it is just being a single OVA episode. It brings back hilarious memories especially about an idiotic girl who always finds herself at the deserving end of her assassin friend. She never learns. We laugh. It’s such a good combo and mix. Now she gets to do it all over again. She must have buffed up during the series’ absence and got ready to face whatever punishment she is about to receive. Whatever. As long as you make me laugh, she can get beaten to a pulp for all I care. Oops. I sound like a sadist. But blame it on Yasuna for making me that. As usual, this single OVA is divided into several short skits in which there is no real plot except for Yasuna getting owned by Sonya. She really does love making her mad, doesn’t she? Well Sonya, hope you get your weapons sharpened because here we go again.

Let The Killing Begin!
Yasuna finds a Buddhist alarm clock on Sonya’s table. Weird. Chanting Buddhist lines? She accidentally breaks its head off and panics. Maybe it’s a gift Sonya wants to give her? Dream on. She hides tries to hide it when Sonya comes in looking for something she forgot to take home. Sonya knows something is wrong because she is acting real strange. Hiding something? Just stomach ache problem. To Yasuna’s horror, Sonya didn’t intend to give whatever she left behind as a gift. So it isn’t technically Yasuna’s property, right? She is going to excuse herself as the ‘stomach ache’ is getting bad when the clock starts ‘chanting’. Sonya wants her to show her hands. Not going to. Instead of risking a body search, Yasuna will take it off herself but it seems it is stuck. She wants Sonya to turn around while she undresses but it is just a plot to escape. With the assassin hot on her heels, Yasuna drops ninja marbles to escape but was too stupid to drop it in front of herself. Sonya sees the broken clock and notes it isn’t hers. Why is Yasuna feeling so disappointed? Turns out the clock belongs to Agiri so the idiot tries to blame Sonya for breaking it. Agiri reveals the head part holds a spare battery and thus can be removed. Duh… Now Sonya wants to remove Yasuna’s head… Oh sh*t…

Yasuna’s hands are cold and she knows better than to touch Sonya. Here comes the beating! Because of that, the next day she comes to school with both her hands bandaged. Sonya her confident her beating can’t do this to her but it seems it is genuine. She feels sorry but Yasuna takes advantage of this by being cocky. Can’t hear you say sorry loud enough. I don’t remember her ears getting hurt. Since Yasuna can’t use her hands, she wants Sonya to do stuffs on her behalf. Like massage her feet. Or feed her (Sonya use hospital drips) and even copy notes on her behalf. The idiot has the cheek to say her handwriting is unreadable! Can she be choosy?! Sonya has had it and is going to punch her uninjured face. Because of the bandages, Yasuna’s hands are longer so they reach Sonya’s face first. Now she chokes her. That’s cheating! Suddenly Yasuna’s hands feel itchy. She can’t stand it anymore and takes off her bandages to scratch them. Sonya grows mad upon seeing her tiny injury on her thumb with a plaster. Now she is going to hurt her body all over.

Yasuna is about to eat her lunch when she realizes it is a pile of tiles. She got the cheek to ask Sonya to share half their lunches. Then Yasuna remembers. She wanted to see Sonya break tiles and somehow mixed it up with her lunch. Since it’s like this, she bugs Sonya to break them. But Sonya threatens her back. If Yasuna can’t break them, she’ll chop her up! Yasuna tricks her into looking out the window while she breaks it with her knee. It didn’t. She just got more pain on her knee. Then she has her demonstrate how to break one. Can do it again? You were too fast. Sonya knows it’s her ploy to let her break all the tiles and so Yasuna will do a high kick instead. Can her leg kick this high? Well, she kicks Sonya’s ribs. Thanks to the tiles, Yasuna was able to block all her knives. I think Sonya will enjoy breaking Yasuna than the tiles. Yasuna tries to break the tile with her teeth thinking it’s the strongest part. Obviously not. Feeling sorry for her, Sonya will buy her something. But she realizes she has no cash and already ate her lunch. Yasuna is in shock that she drops the tiles. See, it’s now broken.

Sonya wants to go to the bathroom but Yasuna scares her with a scary legend. She doesn’t believe her and makes her way there till she hears a couple of girls commenting on how scary the toilet is. She goes to a further toilet and seems Yasuna is tailing her, complaining she didn’t believe her but other girls. She narrates her firsthand experience but it sounds like somebody having a bad case of stomach ache. They enter the toilet and find nothing. Yasuna gets cheeky by switching on and off the likes only to get beaten up. Then they hear something from the cubicle before the lights go out. Yasuna asserts it wasn’t her. Sonya starts slashing blindly and cuts something. There goes Yasuna’s bangs. Yasuna then figures out a way to exorcise the ghost. She will chant some Buddhist lines to power up Sonya’s knife. It is just a ploy to record Sonya in her embarrassing pose. Sonya then feels the atmosphere suddenly changed. Yasuna notes the door is opened and is sure Sonya has scared the ghost off. Sonya is not pleased and stains the toilet floors, walls and door with that idiot’s blood. Will this turn into a scary legend?

Agiri has Sonya and Yasuna help her clean her shed. As a reward, they can take anything they find. I’m sure Yasuna is more interested in this part. After Agiri leaves for some ‘urgent’ business, Sonya starts cleaning but the idiot fools around. She finds a little tea doll believed to be able to move when you put something on its tray. Yasuna puts the teacup but nothing happens. Suddenly the doll’s hair grows long! From the box, it is revealed it is a scary toy. Little do they know, the doll starts walking away from them… Yasuna wants to get a fragile jar on the top shelf. She wants Sonya to at least throw her up but she throws her to the wall! Hey, the jar is going to fall off now. Sonya prepares to catch it but Yasuna crashes into her to get back but the jar falls on her head. Now it’s broken and Agiri has returned. As usual, the idiot blames it all on Sonya but Agiri doesn’t mind about the jar. However it’s a family heirloom… Just kidding! Also inside it was a secret spirit medicine that she was looking. It was hidden in that broken jar? Yasuna freaks out when Agiri says she really liked that jar…

Yasuna tells Sonya that Agiri is calling her to the clubroom. Sonya doesn’t think it is possible because she just met that ninja. Perhaps it’s a fake. And when Agiri comes in, Sonya can clearly tell this fake because of her eyes. Yeah, the faker tries to even adjust her eyes. Yasuna believes she’s the real deal because she gave her sweets, something Agiri never does. WTF. Agiri says she is trying some sort of disguise that looks like herself. WTF. She has the duo look into some crystal ball. Unknown to them, she is going to smack them from behind. Sonya quickly evades and Yasuna takes the full brunt. Now do you believe she is a fake? The real Agiri comes in and notes this automatic doppelganger skill of hers. Then she also tears off her ‘mask’ so that her face is the same as the fake. Now can you tell who is apart? Anyway the fake admits she is one and is an assassin out to take out Sonya. Actually Sonya already knew it from the start. The fake attacks but was beaten up by Sonya and Yasuna. Why didn’t the other help? Because the other never considered her her partner. The unbeaten one is the real Agiri as she unmasks herself. Confused? Sonya and Yasuna talk about their own doppelgangers but Yasuna is not confident she can tell Sonya’s one apart because assassins look like idiots. Now that deserves a beating up.

Yasuna dressed in a pumpkin head threatens Sonya to hand over all her candies for Halloween. You think Sonya would fall for that? Yasuna then gives her a special candy which turns out to be a cockroach! Yasuna explains she is just testing her to see if she gets violent with children. Oh, really? Is she sure she just doesn’t want to piss her off? She then dresses as a ghost to make Sonya to hand over her candies. Since that is not going to happen and Yasuna going to unleash her whatever trick, Sonya punches her in the face. Sonya is wary when Yasuna gives her candies, though her excuse that this is practice for her to give candies to kids. Sonya knows she is preparing for something that deserves to be whacked. And true enough, the idiot becomes a menacing idiot in asking for the candy and gets beaten up. Yasuna then makes her wear the pumpkin and the role to play the monster. But she teases her that she dresses up like that for the candy. No prizes for guessing what Sonya’s reaction is and what happens to Yasuna.

The locals are having a costume contest and Yasuna wants to join in for the candy prize. But why does she have to drag Sonya along? As Yasuna gets dressed, Sonya thinks the idiot has come back to tease her and scares her off. Turns out to be an authentic little girl asking for candies. Yasuna uses this opportunity to blackmail her that if she doesn’t want her to rat on her parents, better put on some costume. Yasuna suggests she wears a Santa outfit so that people will pity her for mistaking the wrong holiday season. Pow! With only a few pieces of garments left over, Yasuna wears them all and becomes some sort of fusion monster. Not even those creative monster creators could come up with this sh*t. A couple of kids tease Yasuna for the oddball costume she is so she gives them her special candy. Cockroaches!!! How mean… Sonya dresses up as a simple ghost but Yasuna steps over her excess cloth to make her trip. Feel like dying? Later everyone is impressed with Yasuna’s real life-like zombie makeup and she wins the first prize. Thank Sonya for that. Woah. The bruises are real dude!

Killing Me Loudly With Their Jokes
Oh wow! That was good! It was hilarious! I loved it. Brings back so many memories and how I wished they made another season out of it. But for now, I’ll just have to be (very) content with what I have now and once more, hats off to the idiot and assassin (and also the ninja) for bringing back the laughs. It was pretty amazing and funny to see Yasuna creatively coming up with all sorts of pranks just to piss Sonya off. It’s like it is her destiny to do so and is not afraid of the consequences. I mean, she really is afraid of getting her bones broken but I think she is the type of jump first, think later. That’s why she never thinks of the consequences and would just jump in to have fun. After all the beat ups, strikes, whacks and hammering, her injuries never stay so very long and before you know it, she’s back to her usual trickster ways. Maybe Sonya hit her head so hard that she has memory problems. Yeah. Short memory. I guess that’s why she never learns or remembers the pain from her previous punishment. But it’s a good thing since it shows her perseverance and that Yasuna is the same idiotic girl we all love and know.

Sonya on the other hand as usual always has her patience tested out and it makes me wonder if taking an anger management class would suffice. On second thought, would it even do any good? Imagine if an irritating person constantly pisses you off, don’t you think it is natural for you to go beat that person up instead of forgiving her or just sit around and accept her pranks? Hmm… Maybe that will scare Yasuna off. Because no reaction or the kind Sonya would definitely be no fun. Yes. It’s the reactions that Yasuna would love to see in making Sonya really mad. So is the pain worthwhile? For an idiot like Yasuna, it is. So here is to more pain and punishment from these comedic duo for years to come. Not forgetting of course the dreamy ninja scammer Agiri. She too is pretty funny and tricky in her own ways but still the main duo are the ones that bring in the main laughs. Say… What happened to that Unused Character?! She didn’t appear in here at all! Not really needed, huh? Yeah. This anime doesn’t need 2 big idiots.

Even if Sonya didn’t chop me with her karate fists, I still almost died laughing this OVA. I can say that this series’ joke level is on par with Gintama because I was really laughing at all the silliness. Now that the OVA is over and this series has once again died down into oblivion, it feels a little tad sad and making me wonder if there is going to be another. Well, maybe in the future they can surprise me like this again. But what are the chances? Maybe I should become an idiot and play some silly pranks on the producers to bug them for another season. Even if I end up with broken arms, ribs and limbs, it’s all going to be worth it. Or maybe not. That wouldn’t be funny anymore.

Kill Me Baby

October 7, 2012

Imagine if you had a friend your age who works as an assassin. Wouldn’t that be cool? Well, as long as you don’t be his/her next target then I guess it is fine. Hey wait a minute. There’s something wrong with that sentence. A professional assassin having a friend? A friend?! What more, the assassin in Kill Me Baby is a high school girl and attends it like any other normal girl. I know. It’s a WTF scenario but that’s not the point.

Looking at the title, it’s either going to be a gory and violent series or a comedy. I mean, what do you think of its second title, Baby, Please Kill Me? If that doesn’t help, try looking at the poster. Aha. Two cute high school girls. That says it. This is going to be a wacky comedy. Yes, wacky. And I mean somebody is going to get whacked a lot. Our assassin protagonist is Sonya, a foreigner who is highly and specially trained in her field. However, you won’t see her carrying out missions like Metal Gear Solid’s Snake as most of the ‘threats’ come from her close friend, Yasuna Oribe. To sum this girl up in a word: She’s an idiot. Dimwit. Foolish. Dumb. Troublemaker. Okay, maybe one word isn’t enough to describe her but you get the idea. Despite knowing Sonya is an assassin, she always wants to play pranks on Sonya but ends up getting backfired and bearing the brunt of her actions. You reap what you sew. Some friend she is. And yes. This is where all the laughing moments come in. So when a dimwit like her tries to play a prank on an assassin, it’s like asking for a death wish, right? Hence the name of this series. You’ll ‘enjoy’ the stupidity that moron can actually come up with just to tease Sonya. They say keep your enemies close, but your friends closer…

Episode 1
* Right off the bat, Yasuna gets her first bone breaking moment when she greets Sonya by touching her shoulder from the back. Never approach an assassin from the back. But will she learn? Yeah, she got it a second time when she thought she spotted something on her shoulder.
* Despite being an assassin, Sonya has some phobias of her own: Bugs. In this case, cockroaches. Being cautious of its hygienic threat seems like a nice way to put it. Or an excuse not to admit.
* Yasuna wants Sonya to teach her some self-defence moves. I suppose the eye poking move is out of the question. As with the swift uppercut punch that Yasuna barely sees.
* Yasuna didn’t bring a bottle opener and thought Sonya could just cut off the bottle cap. Initially she didn’t want to do it but Yasuna convinces her by trying to tap on her shoulder. Soon she has her chop another one but Sonya drinks it all. Not happy, she pulls out a water gun but gets submitted. Painfully.
* While eating lunch, a stray dog comes in and looks like this is another thing that Sonya fears. Sonya throws her lunch at it in which the doggie eats it. Yasuna thought of putting a trail of food but ran out of supplies before reaching the door. Then trying the carrot-on-a-stick trick, Yasuna herself became a victim of her own trick. Yasuna buys lots of food for it to eat and the doggie becomes tamed. On the way home, Sonya curses her bad day so Yasuna assures she’ll always be here as her friend and pats her shoulder. Well, here comes the pain.
* Yasuna hears rumours of a ghost in school and excitedly goes to hunt it. She has Sonya tag along or else she’ll put a scary photo album in her desk. Oh, looks like she doesn’t handle ghost stories well too. Outside the rumoured room, Sonya rolls in like a SWAT guy. Is she facing a human or ghost? Noticing a shuriken on the floor, Sonya remembers there’s a ninja in her organization. By the way, there’s one hiding lamely behind the wall. Slashing the fake wall away, it turns out to be a decoy. As Agiri Goshiki puts it, it’s her body substitution technique. So what is she doing in this school? She had to change school due to work and heard there’s a ninja club in this school but it died out 40 years ago! And that shuriken is her name card…
* Yasuna wants Agiri to demonstrate some ninja techniques but I think hypnotism doesn’t quite cut it. Then she shows another one whereby she stands upside down on the ceiling without her hair falling down. So, is this the rumoured ghost? Then shaking hands with Yasuna, the fake hands reveal to be a bomb. Boom! That was more of a prank than a ninja technique, right? Minding the afro the girls got, they look at the pictures they took and find that a ghost in the picture!
* Yasuna wanted to find Agiri but mistakes somebody else that looks like her. After finding the real one, she wants her to teach some ninja techniques. But what does buying bread for her have to do with it? Isn’t she being used as her lackey? Her first real lesson is body substitution but Yasuna hasn’t learnt anything yet. Agiri throws her shuriken and Yasuna barely evades it. See, it works, right? Next is body cloning. Agiri shoots her blowpipe at her and Yasuna’s vision starts multiplying! Woah! There are 4 Agiris now! Then Agiri tries to sell scrolls that will teach her how to control some elements. 800 Yen a piece. Sounds like a deal?
* Yasuna gets cocky and decides to show off to Sonya and use the fire technique she learnt. Turns out to be a fire lighter. She gets whacked by Sonya because she may be lighting a bomb fuse and cause them afros again. Looking at all the other scrolls she bought, the water scroll turns out to be a water container, the ant scroll is just a mini ant farm and the eye scroll is just a telescope. Scammed! Using the telescope, they thought they saw Agiri on a kite when it turned out to be just her picture. Agiri flying the kite waves at them and Yasuna wonders how she knows she’s looking at her. Clairvoyance technique? Well, Agiri won’t say.

Episode 2
* I guess Yasuna never really learns from her mistakes. Again, she tries to greet Sonya from the back. Not only once, but twice! In class, Yasuna bugs Sonya to teach her some moves. The truth is she wants to use them and counter her moves next time. What will she get in return? All her sins will be forgiven… Not even worth it! I guess the only way to stop that idiot from bugging her is to teach her a move. Yasuna thought she could learn the Super Rolling Crush but Sonya isn’t stupid enough to do that embarrassing move. How about playing dead? She’s not a bear… At least how about how to get out of a headlock? Biting? Well, Sonya’s submission move on her sure didn’t give her chance to bite anywhere. Tickling? Can’t reach…
* Yasuna buys nunchuckus after seeing a movie. Letting Sonya try it out, she gets whacked on the head by it. Was it accident or on purpose? When Yasuna uses it herself, she hits herself many times over. That’s not how you use it… Yasuna made her lunch like nunchuckus and tricks Sonya into eating them but it seems Yasuna swapped wrongly and ends up with the real one instead. Start apologizing… When a crow steals Sonya’s meal, Yasuna teases her for letting that happen. Sonya throws a ball and though misses Yasuna, the idiot tripped on the nunchuckus.
* Yasuna ‘forces’ Sonya to come with her after school to a crepe shop but it seems they got lost. After finding their way out and buying their crepe, Yasuna sees a notice of a lost bear. She thought of surprising Sonya with this news but it seems the bear is standing right behind her! Yasuna is so scared that she plays dead standing up! The bear is attracted to her crepe but Yasuna doesn’t want to lose and swallows it down! She’s supposed to throw it and run away, right? Well, idiots…
* Sonya does a pole vault jump and she’s not going to pull off some flashy move because it’s for her to escape by hiding up the post! Yasuna thought Agiri is here to help but she starts selling her ninja products. I think Yasuna knows by now it’s all just scams. Yasuna promises to buy her a crepe to help her but she’s just doing magic tricks that eventually fails. Agiri then says she’ll buy the crepe herself since it’s too much trouble and disappears. Haha! Yasuna, you’re on your own.
* Yasuna panics and since she’s not going down alone, she tries to make Sonya fall off the post! She climbs up but the bear starts shaking it. Yasuna falls off and crashes onto the bear’s head, knocking it out. Now she gets cocky and takes a commemorative photo with it.
* Yasuna gets beaten up after giving Sonya a paper fan and teasing her about it. She tries to yap like a dog since Sonya fears canines but gets owned instead.
* Yasuna has hiccups so Sonya suggests if she holds her breath, it’ll go away. But she gave up too easily.
* Yasuna catches a bee in a cup and has trouble disposing it. Agiri offers to make it disappear and messes with Yasuna’s mind that the bee is now in her clothes when it’s actually still in the cup. Oh, will Yasuna take an interest in buying more ninja stuffs from her? Colour coded rice? Uhm… I think she’ll pass. And this get rich scheme? It’s just a lottery but Yasuna will take it! Anyway she lost.
* Yasuna teases Sonya for not being able to dodge a ball but she herself gets hit in the head while laughing too hard and not paying attention.
* A girl’s balloon is stuck in the tree so Yasuna offers to help but sends Sonya to fetch it. Go do it yourself! After all the useless attempts, the balloon got loose and flies away. Yasuna feels guilty and will buy her a new one but the girl says it’s not her balloon to begin with.
* Yasuna thought of playing hide and seek but Sonya warns if she finds her, she’ll be dead meat. So still want to play? Yasuna says she’s good at hiding that no one was able to find her. That’s because she was always left behind… Sonya becomes ‘it’ and knows Yasuna is going to pull a fast one not counting properly. Knife at throat… So as she counts properly, Sonya goes off but the little girl returns her knife thinking she’s playing a tossing game. She forces Sonya to play with her and screams like as though she’s being threatened if she doesn’t. The police just walked pass by… Thankfully nothing happened. So when Yasuna is ready to find Sonya, she is disheartened to see Sonya targeting the girl! Of course learning that she’s playing with her, she gets jealous that she was here first to play with Sonya. Then they do rock-scissors-paper and Sonya becomes ‘it’. It’s already evening as Sonya wonders why the little girl didn’t hide. It’s already late and it’s time for her to go home. Okay. And Yasuna is hiding in a spot she is confident no one will find her. Eh? Doesn’t this feel familiar?

Episode 3
* And you think by now Yasuna would learn her lesson from greeting Sonya from the back. After being amazed by watching an esper on TV, Yasuna brings a couple of spoons and thinks she’s one too. She starts bending the spoon but gives up easily and plays a fool, earning Sonya’s wrath. Yeah, her whack just bended the spoons.
* Now Yasuna tries magic cards. Of course Yasuna misses by a mile the correct card Sonya picks. Then trying to make a pyramid card, Sonya gets pissed off that this is even an esper trick to begin with and ruins her hard work. I wonder how many hours she has put in to just put that few stacks.
* Sonya uses the cards to cut things but Yasuna is disappointed that isn’t esper trick. How about spontaneous combustion? Using the reflection of the sun, she burns a spot on Yasuna’s body! Don’t try this anywhere!
* Next, Yasuna thinks her esper power is telling the future. Isn’t she just saying what comes to mind? And besides, doesn’t it feel like she’s badmouthing Sonya? Yeah, she can foretell she’ll get hit in the future. Very near future. It came true. Agiri finds out what they’re doing and demonstrates bending a fork. It works! She claims it’s a ninja technique but I bet that fork isn’t made out of metal.
* Yasuna is into lucky charms now but why is she having a voodoo doll?! She’ll be happy if all her troubles go away? What are her troubles… Yasuna wants Sonya to put her strand of hair on it and she’ll be bended the way the doll is bend. However Yasuna got bended instead. Eh? How did her hair end up on the doll? Yasuna even brought an extra doll but it’s not working on Sonya. In fact, she’s making a fool out of herself with her silly poses.
* Sonya doesn’t believe in curses to get rid of someone. Hey, she’s an assassin, right? She breaks the doll so Yasuna says something bad will happen to her hips. True enough, Sonya can spot by a mile she’s going to kick her hips and grabs her feet. Trying to change the topic to fortune telling, Sonya says long ago, people used broken bones to tell the future. Oh Yasuna… Bones of animals lah.
* Yasuna has Sonya draw her fortune and it says she’ll have misfortune on her legs. Sonya knows she’s up to know good and true enough, Yasuna was going to put something in her shoes.
* Moving on to palm reading, Sonya gets mad when she pinches her pressure points instead. Then realizing Yasuna’s voodoo doll is still around, she throws it away but realizes the effects really worked as Yasuna tumbles down the stairs.
* On a rainy day in class, Yasuna doesn’t want to self-study (because it’s only for idiots – she’s the one to say), she has Sonya do puzzle rings only to tease her. So when Sonya throws it at her face, the rings are separated. That’s not using your head! Yasuna tries her hand at it and sneakily throws it at Sonya but her quick reflexes chopped it. Now it’s separated! Can she consider that as using her head?
* Yasuna makes a teruterubouzu to make the rain go away. But when she makes it to resemble Sonya, the assassin is going to make a life size one out of Yasuna. Yasuna decide to use her imagination to bring the sun in. But she imagined too much and the scene turns into a desert. Now she’s dehydrating. Eventually Yasuna couldn’t resist playing in the rain and gets all soaked. The rain stops and she views the beautiful rainbow.
* A girl whom we shall call as Unused Character (Botsu Kyara), makes her debut in front of Yasuna and Sonya’s school. She wants to have revenge on them for stealing her spotlight. WTF. However she won’t be advancing further as the guard at the gate stops her and thinks she’s late for school and reprimands her.
* Noticing a lot of crows are gathering, Yasuna thinks they’re attracted to Sonya’s blood thirst and suggests wearing a hideous mask. Uhm, doesn’t that look like a bull’s eye? She puts it on and if you have a wild imagination, you can see her as a scary one eye monster!
* Unused Character sneaks into school and tries to find the duo. Yasuna gives Sonya her pink bunny named Pyonsuke for her to cuddle and make friends with so she won’t be so cold. However Sonya ties it up into a garbage! Yasuna is horrified and is going to avenge Pyonsuke. Is she sure she wants to take on her? When Unused Character enters class, nobody is around. Seems Yasuna and Sonya are having a sumo bout outside. The rational is, in sumo wrestling you can’t punch or kick so Yasuna thinks she’s safe in this sense. Plus, thinking she’s Japanese, she’ll definitely win. No basis for that! It starts but Sonya uses a submission move on her. Is that legal? Having it another go, luckily Yasuna warns her that poking eyes is not allowed too! She should’ve said something about slapping too. By the time Unused Character arrives, the duo are gone. Just when she spots them, she sees the hideous bull’s eye mask Yasuna is wearing and freaks out. Unused Character laments her tough opponents but won’t give up and show she won’t stay as an unused character forever. However God even says that’s impossible.
* Sonya spots a caterpillar on Yasuna’s shoulder and gets scared. Yasuna thinks she is finally scared of her and chases her down.

Episode 4
* Yasuna buys an ice cream for herself and Sonya. However Sonya got the winning stick and she the loser. Not wanting to lose, she goes to buy more ice cream and a different bunch to increase her winning chances. Realizing the one she touches are losers, she bites Sonya’s stick and since it reveals to be a losing stick, teases Sonya that she’s a loser! Sonya sticks it down the loser’s throat.
* Sonya’s touch is like Midas’ touch. The ice cream she picks turns out to be winners. But at this point she is full but the fool still wants to go on till she wins. Agiri comes by and learns what they’re doing. Seems she can tell which ice cream is the winner. Or is it? Does she have a technique like that? Well, she eats the ice cream to find out. How about telling one without eating? She pulls out the stick. I guess Yasuna just gives her the entire bag. Agiri points out the one in her hand is the winner and true enough it’s a winning stick. What did she win? Another ice cream. Won’t her stomach get upset eating too much ice cream? Well, let’s say her stomach is an idiot too.
* To beat the heat of summer, Yasuna thought of playing with fans but her tricks end up wetting the floor and has to clean it. Then thinking of looking at wind chimes would be refreshing but there is no wind. Suggesting to plant greens to make a natural curtain, however by the time it grows, summer will be over.
* The duo are at the beach and Yasuna is going to split the watermelon. But why is she facing Sonya’s way? Yeah, an excuse to whack her. Sonya does the job and knows she can’t trust Yasuna. Just as she’s about to slice it, she realizes Yasuna also wants to split it. So they both have a competition to see who can split the watermelon first blindfolded. Sonya takes it off and splits it to leave that idiot wandering around. So when Yasuna sees her eating, she just says she split it before her. She’s not technically lying, right? At night, Yasuna thought of doing kimodameshi (test of courage) and scares the daylights of Sonya, earning her a punch. Now she sees some stars…
* In class, Sonya feels someone from a different organization is after her. Yasuna thought an innocent bystander will be safe but Sonya notes she can use her as a shield! Yasuna thinks she’ll double cross her and bargain her life by selling her out. Maybe Sonya should get rid of her first. Suddenly a knife is thrown her way. It’s real! Somebody is after her! Yasuna panics as they make a run to the unused classroom. Agiri learns of it and offers to help out. Thinking the assassin is hiding inside the locker, Agiri throws her shurikens (including her new handphone). The ninja assassin comes out of hiding and it seems he’s in the next locker instead. He is about to get serious when Agiri knocks him out with a boomerang. So much about that.
* Yasuna wants to give Sonya a head massage to make her smarter. Like she needs it. But she’s commenting on the silly face she’s making so Sonya threatens to rearrange her face. Now it’s Sonya’s turn and the force she’s applying may make her dumber instead.
* Yasuna thinks doing some yoga move will improve their intelligence. But when Sonya does it, she teases her for looking like an idiot. Just joking! Then doing another move that will make her punch stronger, when Sonya learns she just came up with it on the spot, she gets punched. See, it’s stronger now. Yasuna prostrates on her knees and this pose is to calm down anger… Thinking having fish for lunch will improve her brain, turns out it’s just a seaweed with a fish shape. So she goes to buy some fish but it’s just taiyaki.
* Sonya gets a letter to meet in the empty classroom. She ignores it knowing it’s one of those schemes from Yasuna. Next day, the same letter begs her to come. That confirms it. She confronts Yasuna but it seems she doesn’t know a thing. Then reading a letter in her desk that wants her to do a weird dance or else she’ll be shot, she pinches Yasuna’s cheek but the idiot says she really doesn’t know anything.
* Sonya enters the empty room and meets a fake Yasuna! She claims in order to get rid of her, she disguises as herself. Huh? Sonya is going to leave so Yasuna changes her mind that she is the real one. Can she prove it? Anyway she gets beaten up when Yasuna comes in. Another Yasuna? So the first fake is actually an assassin? But why disguise as Yasuna if she was going to announce she’s one? Yeah, her stupidity is like her. The second fake Yasuna fires her blowpipe in which Sonya barely evades. She’s here to eliminate Sonya but didn’t realize another assassin had the same disguise idea. Oh no. Another stupid one. The fakes decide to team up and finish Sonya off but it seem they’re fighting among themselves to see who does the job. So when the real Yasuna comes in, she plays along and tries to confuse Sonya which is the real one! Asking questions the real one would only know, however the real one doesn’t even know what she had for lunch! The trio’s unison attack failed miserably and Sonya realizes that attacking the real one won’t be so bad after all. The trio got worried and Sonya beats them all up. Saves the trouble. So when the real one says how mean she is, Sonya notes that she is the real one because she could take her hits. On the way home, Yasuna thought Sonya knew who the real one is halfway through but she didn’t. Heck she didn’t care. And the ninja assassin tied up in the locker came falling out… Do the fake Yasunas know him?

Episode 5
* Yasuna wants Sonya to go bug catching with her and makes several bad bug puns that has the net over her head instead. Wanting her to put sugar coating to attract bugs, Sonya paints it over her face instead! Well, she did say to put it anywhere she likes. Bugs are being attracted to the sugar coat on the tree and Yasuna wants Sonya to get them. Go get it yourself! She gives Sonya a bug spray but she sprays it over a certain big annoying ‘bug’.
* A bug chases after Yasuna when a bird eats it. It starts speaking and could this bird be Agiri? Actually there’ a transmitter over the bird thus they can hear her voice. She tells them she was practising this morning and got stuck on this tree since the bugs got attracted to it. Yasuna throws a stone at the sugar coat but it seems Agiri was hiding behind it and it hit her face! Actually that was just a body substitution. The real one? In the body substitution! So it didn’t hurt because she hit her substitution? How did that even happen?
* Sonya and Yasuna are at the festival and the latter thinks of buying all the food to show off. Does she even have enough money? Playing the goldfish scooping, Yasuna sucks but Sonya is a pro. The sore loser accuses Sonya of being a demon. The shopkeeper gives them a free goldfish to stop them from fighting but they felt so bad that they didn’t take it.
* At the ring toss stall, Yasuna just sucks in trying to get that single prize she wants. Begging Sonya to help her, the shopkeeper even says if she manages to hit it, he’ll give her the prize. I guess Sonya was too powerful and chops off the head of the prize. And they just got that. Sonya thought she saw a sniper at the festival but that’s just the shooting gallery stall.
* Sonya waits for Yasuna to buy takoyaki but she wasted her money five times to win a mask just to scare her. Got beaten up of course. Yasuna wanted to trade her mask with the candy apple Sonya bought. No way. Instead, a couple of kids got attracted and managed to convince the fool to part with it. With 500 Yen left, Sonya knows too well Yasuna is going to blow it on something useless. True enough, she buys a toy gun. But when the fireworks start, Sonya gets startled thinking she fired a real gun and Yasuna gets beaten up as usual.
* Sonya gets pissed off upon realizing Yasuna invited her fishing so she could catch fish for her. Walking along the beach, a stray dog chases them as they are trapped on a rock. Yasuna throws a sausage as distraction but the dog didn’t budge since she threw it too far. The one who found the sausage is Agiri and she’s happily eating it. Realizing the predicament they’re in, she calls the dog owner to pick up his pet. He gives her a reward and since she doesn’t need it, he is about to keep it when Agiri changes her mind and accepts it. Agiri thinks of digging for some Shijimi clams. Yasuna gets excited seeing Agiri has a bunch of them and starts digging. But who knows, she actually bought them from the store. Sonya wonders if she can find any at the beach because Shijimi clams live only in fresh water rivers or lakes on not the sea.
* Even if Yasuna didn’t find any, the gang make a nice meal of the ones Agiri had. Then they realize the tide has risen and they’re stuck on this mini island. Since Yasuna is the only one wearing a swimsuit, they make her paddle while pulling the tub the duo is riding in. I guess the motivation to swim around the world like this would do, eh?
* Yasuna shows hand puppets of themselves she made. It’s for the kindergarten community service she’ll be doing. Sonya is not amused with Yasuna enacting her killer personality. Sonya strangles Yasuna’s hand puppet and subsequently throws them away. But Yasuna has more. This time she made an alligator Sonya and a cute kitty of herself. Even after getting hit, Yasuna continues to put up a lame play about them. Yasuna makes Sonya practice with her and gives the kitty hand puppet to her but Sonya turns it into an assassination tool. Then swapping the puppets, Yasuna wants to ‘fight’ and it ends with the crocodile ripping the cat’s head. Not out yet, Yasuna draws a single eye over her palm as its true form so Sonya transforms hers with a knife protruding out of its head. Better admit you lost. On the way back, Yasuna dreams big that her puppet show will be a big hit and that people will swamp her for autographs, get her own CDs, movies, dramas and even win the Nobel Prize. Sonya didn’t want to hear all that bragging and ‘disappears’.

Episode 6
* Even though Yasuna still didn’t learn about approaching Sonya from the back, she teases her that her punch is getting weaker. Want to try that out again to make sure? In class, Yasuna realizes she hasn’t eaten shaved ice for summer and has bought an old ice shaving machine (waste money again). Despite bringing different flavours, it’s useless without ice, right? There’s this green suspicious one which Yasuna is supposed to trick Sonya into eating so she pours it down Yasuna’s throat instead.
* Thinking Agiri may have something up her sleeve, Yasuna wants Sonya to call her. But was she hiding in the locker all along? Nope. Body substitution… Yasuna wants to know if she has any technique to make ice. Dry ice she’s got… Yasuna makes shaved ice out of it as she doesn’t want it to go to waste but when she wants Sonya to eat it, Sonya ties her down and is going to force the carbon dioxide down her.
* Agiri has a technique that will make snow. On the rooftop, she shoots one from her cannon. That’s it. Just one snowball. Actually she can make more with the ice packet she bought from the store. Yasuna has eaten too many shaved ice that she’s chilled to the bones. Sonya suggests something spicy and all that hot stuff just burnt her mouth.
* Yasuna realizes she hasn’t been to the pool for summer but it seems it is unkempt and growing with moss. Sonya kicks her in.
* Yasuna wants to follow Sonya back to her house. Of course she can’t but that idiot throws a tantrum. She knows better not to trust this idiot despite her promise not to tell anybody. We know it’s the same story. She is made to wear a blindfold and ear plugs. It’s really scary that she can’t see or hear anything as Sonya tugs her along the street. Looks like a slave, doesn’t she? Anyway she bumps into something and got knocked out.
* Yasuna wakes up and to her surprise Sonya’s room is pretty Japanese-like. Actually it’s Agiri’s home. Since Yasuna fainted halfway, Sonya brought her to the nearest house. Maybe she should have left her there… Yasuna is excited she is in a ninja house as Agiri shows her the secret compartments whereby she stores food and the secret doorway which leads to the toilet. What about that tricky gadget? It’s the remote for the air-cond.
* Yasuna moves a funny doll on the TV and it activates a trapdoor which Sonya fell in. She’s going to kill her. Suddenly the room is filled with gas as Sonya makes her escape via secret passageway. Agiri assures Yasuna the gas is harmless but why is she wearing a gas mask?! It’s sleeping gas! Since Sonya doesn’t want to carry her back, what is the best solution? She leaves her sleeping at the park bench.
* The typhoon is approaching and Yasuna thought she could use the forces of nature against Sonya. How wrong. Trying to use her stupid brain, she thought if she throws her bag, Sonya will catch it with both her hands and this will leave her open. Guess what? Sonya didn’t catch it. It’s not her bag. Yasuna thought of doing her Whirlwind Punch but gets threatened with the knife. But she manages to trick Sonya that her knife is a toothbrush. The wind got stronger and something blew into Sonya’s eyes. As she tries to rub it off, she accidentally walks into a store. The knife is still in her hands…
* Yasuna has made a string of teruterubouzu and thought the weather should clear up. The strong wind blows it away and an old guy thought he saw a flying dragon! During class, a blackout occurs and Yasuna takes this chance to do something that she wouldn’t normally do in class: A stupid pose. The lights come back on and everybody sees her in an embarrassing position. When Sonya’s in the toilet, another temporary blackout occurs. When the lights are back, she got spooked seeing Yasuna behind her in the mirror. Poor girl got punched despite her genuine intention to use the bathroom.
* Since Yasuna forgot her umbrella, Sonya shares it with her. Along the way, Yasuna thought she saw something in the bushes when a frog jumps on her head. Sonya rather gets wet than be near her. Hell she’s going to get it off for her. Once the frog is gone, they continue walking but the strong wind distorts the umbrella. Yasuna bloopers in fixing it and gets whacked. Now they’re all wet. She thought she saw an abandoned umbrella but it turns out to be sheltering an abandoned kitten. So I guess they didn’t take the umbrella because the duo are absent from class the next day. I’m not sure if they took the kitten back too.

Episode 7
* Yasuna tries to trick Sonya into wearing a silly mask and doing a silly pose as explanation for the cultural festival. Not falling for that crap. Yasuna wants Sonya to help time how long she can hold her breath. Eight seconds… Felt like eternity, eh? Since Yasuna accuses her of not knowing how to use a stopwatch, she stabs her knife through it. Now it’s stopped. Yasuna challenges Sonya to hold her breath since that assassin doesn’t like to lose out to that idiot no matter how silly it is.
* She gets Agiri to try and read what’s on Sonya’s mind since she can’t speak while holding her breath. Let’s say she’s just making wild guesses. Sonya has passed the 3-minute mark so Agiri suggests teasing her. Sonya didn’t lose her breath and Yasuna got whacked. To check if she’s really holding her breath, she puts a talisman over her forehead. Sonya does a submission move on her. And she’s still holding her breath. Sonya is 2 seconds away from breaking the world record when Yasuna scares her with a mask. She’s not going to hold her breath anymore. She’s going to end her life!
* In order to check which spot in school has the best drinking water, Yasuna drinks from every tap but eventually couldn’t tell. She even forgot her original goal.
* Yasuna thinks their class should hold a maid cafe for the festival and wants to see Sonya as a clumsy maid. Sonya thought they should hold a rifle range instead. Isn’t that dangerous? How about knife tossing? Putting pins on tofu is much safer? Then about putting up a haunted house, Yasuna puts on that bull’s eye mask on her and realizes how scary she is.
* Sonya came in second place for the 100m race since she doesn’t want to use up her energy so Yasuna teases her it’s just an excuse. Pain time. Sonya, Yasuna and Agiri are having lunch and are discussing about having a fourth member for the kibasen event. Unused Character thought they will gladly make her it and rushes to the scene. To her horror, they roped in an old man. Now the question is, who will ride the top. Sonya and Yasuna don’t want the other so they challenge each other to snatch each other’s hats. Yasuna tries the UFO trick but Sonya doesn’t fall for it. There really was a UFO but it’s a remote control UFO by Agiri. Speaking of which, Agiri wins. So in the end, the old man gets to ride them but they got disqualified before it even starts.
* Yasuna is having fun with beanbags and throws it at Sonya’s face. She caught it and a certain someone got beaten up. Yasuna flops at juggling them at first but once she finds out how good she’s getting, she starts bragging. Sonya juggles her knives as Yasuna tries to interrupt by throwing the beanbags. Sonya catches them and adds them to her juggle. She starts throwing other things but Sonya juggles them all. Till she starts throwing a chair, Yasuna gets whacked.
* Then trying pantomime, she teases this is much more interesting than her knife trick and challenges her to make her smile with that. Sonya threatens the knife at her neck and orders her to smile.
* Yasuna wanted to spin the pot with the umbrella. She flops but when Sonya does it and loses balance, she starts laughing. Knowing she’ll get whacked, she quickly puts the pot on her head as protection but the umbrella was used to grab her neck.
* Yasuna wonders how fire breathers breathe fire so Sonya bluffs her that they eat spicy thing. Though she didn’t buy that crap, the next day she is absent from school. We all know too well she tried that out.
* Yasuna tries to crush a mosquito but accidentally slaps Sonya. Punishment time. I guess Sonya is dead serious in wanting to kill that mosquito. Yasuna gets a taste of her own slap when Sonya spots it landing on her cheek. Sure it wasn’t an excuse to hit her? Eventually Sonya takes it out with her knife. Or not. Yasuna kills it with her bare hands. Noting how dangerous the knife is, Yasuna suggests using a swatter. However she bloopers and ends up swatting herself since the mosquito is flying around her. Yasuna doubles the swatter as bubble maker while Sonya’s pride won’t allow her to miss again. Just as she throws the knife, the nice timing of Yasuna’s swatter deflects it back at her. Phew! Close shave! Sonya takes the swatter and tries to swat it so Yasuna teases her that she’s playing with bubbles. Now there’s a big bug with a big mouth she wants to swat. Yasuna finds a bug spray but Sonya wants to use on a certain pest…
* Yasuna gets this idea of letting the mosquito bite their arm so they can hit it. But when it lands nicely on the table, they just stared at it. Forgetting their goal? The mosquito then lands on Sonya’s head but when she uses her face muscles, Yasuna starts laughing at her horrible expression. Now she really wants to kill that bug. Though Sonya has got a big lump on her forehead, she notes that there is one bug that will always be annoying throughout the year. Does Yasuna even have to ask? Oh, she’s stupid I guess.

Episode 8
* Yasuna seems to be dreading autumn. But she’s just acting that melodrama out and returns to her idiotic self. She has prepared a list of autumn activities to do so Sonya knocks her out and enjoys the ‘autumn silence’.
* Yasuna finds an empty tin and puts it on her head. She thinks it’ll be protection from Sonya’s attacks but she can’t see so she’s scaring innocent bystanders. Yasuna starts screaming Sonya’s name and that’s a no-no when you’re an assassin. If Yasuna is the real enemy, then Sonya has got to take her out first, right? Yeah, this is the real Yasuna as she begs for her life.
* The tin is stuck and she can’t take it off. Tin head. Sonya tries spinning her head but I’m not sure if Yasuna got her head facing in the right direction after that. After bumping into the post, Agiri offers to help out. Uhm, she just put a picture of Yasuna’s face on the tin. Then she leaves without resolving the problem.
* Instead of going to the hospital, she goes to school and tries to figure out a way to remove the tin. How about heating the metal so it expands? Well, it looks like Yasuna is going to get cooked… Putting salad oil for slipperiness didn’t help either. Agiri again helps out but she just puts on a magic show and left without fixing anything. Sonya thought she should use fire again but with salad oil now inside, I think this will get worse.
* Yasuna wants Sonya to hit her but it seems she punched her body instead. She got so mad that the tin came off. Sonya thinks maybe the tin got adjusted to her face that’s why it slid off. Yasuna is happy and puts it back on. And it couldn’t come off. Or maybe it just happened to come off.
* I don’t know how but it eventually got off as Yasuna tries to sneak up on Sonya’s table but was found out. She wanted to place a rock magazine in her desk but Sonya rips it! Also finding a tambourine in it, Yasuna thinks it’s cool if she plays one but she’s not interested. Yasuna is disheartened the band is breaking up. What band? Sonya thinks an idiot like her can’t play a music instrument so Yasuna challenges her to play. Sonya starts with the tambourine and makes a hole in it! On purpose! Yasuna says she can play the flute but it turns out to be a party whistle. Maracas? That’s a baby’s rattle. Noting that Sonya is the violent type that loves to hit, she gives her play a drum. But looks like Yasuna will be her drum.
* Yasuna thought Sonya sucks in playing the real flute. But it’s not a flute. It’s a hidden sword. Then Yasuna scares her by clashing the big cymbals so Sonya reprimands her at the top of the voice. This attracted the other classmates so Yasuna advises her not to shout like an idiot. Better start apologizing or she’ll find herself hanging on the tree all day.
* Yasuna gives her a special flute but it turns out to be a dog whistle. She thought she had tricked Sonya but she jumps away, leaving the pack of dogs turning their attention to that idiot.
* Yasuna draws a bull’s eye and wants Sonya to hold it. She’s using her as target practice, no? She thinks she has special talent for darts after noting the fruit balancing over her dog’s head. What? Then when she threw the paper exactly into the bin, that’s when she thought she had this talent. That’s got nothing to do with darts. She demonstrates her skills but misses the bin and quickly shifts the goal post that this had nothing to do with darts.
* Yasuna tricks Sonya to play darts with her (that her throw is weak). She barely misses her knife. Sonya says it’s game over if she hits bull’s eye and if not, she’ll keep trying till she gets it. Using Yasuna of course. Sonya perfectly strikes the centre but upon closer inspection, it is actually labelled as ‘lose’. As punishment, Yasuna writes 100 points on her forehead and 50 points on her body. I guess this is her plan to make her play. Yasuna is going to use her toy gun as her weapon (I guess she spent her money on this instead of buying a real dart board) so Sonya wants to have a competition. Yasuna’s forehead is labelled as 0 points so that upset idiot fires her gun but Sonya catches it. Sonya didn’t realize her hand was written as 20 points. So Yasuna brags no matter how many times she hits her head, she’ll never earn any points. Exactly what Sonya wanted because she can fire all she wants. Then she fires into her mouth since she’s talking big. Yasuna thought she’s safe if she doesn’t turn around but she didn’t realize her back has been labelled 1000 points. Sonya thought it’s game over and is going to wash the marker of her forehead when Yasuna reveals it’s a permanent marker. Realizing her 0 points is embarrassing, she scribbles to make it 100 points. Duh… So to cover it up, Sonya wears a headband but Yasuna wears a wrestling mask. Laughing stock of the class…

Episode 9
* Yasuna doesn’t remember what she’s looking for. Or even that she’s looking for something. Maybe Sonya hit her too much on the head. I guess it can’t be that important if an idiot like her loses it. Since she keeps whining, Sonya is going to test her new weapon on her. But wait. Did she misplace it? She takes out her knife that can shoot beams. She’s just making that up to cover what she lost. Sonya’s as bad as Yasuna in the sense she won’t admit she lost it. “I haven’t lost it. I just put it somewhere I don’t know”. Yeah… Yasuna suggests looking for each other’s thing and since Yasuna don’t even remember what hers is, maybe another good whack will do the trick. That’ll make her forget more and even dumber! So off Yasuna goes and she didn’t even ask what Sonya’s missing item was. She brought back a stick and obviously that’s not it, dimwit.
* Sonya picked up a 1000 Yen bill and Yasuna thought she could fool her to say it belongs to her. Her purse is always empty to begin with! The real person comes to claim her lost money as Yasuna tries to lie that if she hadn’t come, that evil Sonya would have taken her money.
* Sonya finds her missing item which is a taser. Yasuna is unhappy hers isn’t found yet but gets zapped. That shock must have jolted her memory as she remembers the lost item that is a points card in which you earn enough points to get a free Triple A beef. What was she walking around with that for? To show off of course! The points card drops out from her clothes and she becomes ecstatic that she has found it. She doesn’t have to rub it in to Sonya’s face, you know. But she gets what is coming because the card has already expired.
* Yasuna wants Sonya to come along with her to catch the mythical snake called Tsuchinoko but Sonya doesn’t believe it exists. What if it does? Then she’ll dance with it. Yasuna thought Sonya left early to get a head start to catch it but she wasn’t. Yasuna gets lost in the forest and is afraid to be alone.
* Sonya receives an SMS from Yasuna saying she has caught it. She knows it’s a lie but goes to check it out. True enough, what Yasuna caught was a butterfly. Upset with the misleading message, Sonya falls into a pit trap Yasuna made. Then they thought they see Tsuchinoko but it turns out to be a pit viper. Run!
* Sonya has had it and wants to go home. Yasuna trips and falls on a guy in fatigues. He claims he is Tsuchinoko. Uhm, his name that is. But stupid Yasuna thinks he is the real mythical snake! Even in denial that it can speak Japanese and act like a human! Anyway he is an assassin out to kill Sonya. Both assassins face off but the pit viper has Sonya retreating. The assassin turns his attention to Yasuna as she makes a run. However his feet fell into the pit and Sonya takes him out. Now Yasuna’s bragging…
* Yasuna wants Sonya to fish with her and I guess she knows how to push the right buttons to make her take up the challenge. Of course Yasuna is an amateur, fishing out everything else but a fish. Sonya starts getting scared when Yasuna puts a worm as her bait. But in order not to lose out, she takes over Yasuna’s rod and thus they both start fishing. Well, Sonya fished out junk and even a turtle.
* They challenge to see who can catch the first fish. Yasuna thought if she does a weird pose, the fish will come. She ends up getting muscle cramp. Then she fishes close to Sonya and reels in her rod, pulling Sonya into the water. Yasuna picks her up but seeing her angry face, she drops her back in. Catch and release! Sonya punishes Yasuna with the pole.
* Sonya realizes she lost her paper with orders in it when she fell into the water and orders Yasuna to find it. She’s not going home till she does. Well, this time they caught lots of fish. But no orders. It ends up in the turtle’s mouth in which it’s being picked up by Agiri. She returns it to them in class the next day, much to their surprise.
* Yasuna spots a coin on the road and picks it up. Because of that, a flower pot barely misses smashing onto her head. She thinks she’s damn lucky so to prove her luck, she wants to play a game with Sonya. How about Russian roulette? Not with a real gun! It’s made with chopsticks and it only has one shot. Sonya fires it at Yasuna. Then she made 3 onigiris and one of them is real good. She thought it would be more interesting to have 3 people. But Yasuna unmasks herself to become Agiri! Body substitution? Yasuna didn’t even know how she got substituted into the locker. So the trio eat an onigiri each but in the end they couldn’t tell which is the best since different people have different taste.
* To further test her luck, Agiri suggests playing that pirate barrel but she slices it into half with the sword! I guess the toy wasn’t that lucky. Then with the hand biter, Yasuna puts her hand in and it instantly bites it at first try. Yasuna laments she doesn’t have good luck and goes to buy drinks at the vending machine. The good news is that she won an extra can but the bad news is both aren’t the drinks she wanted. Yasuna is really feeling down so Sonya says it’s because of her stupidity and has nothing to do with luck. Yasuna feels better knowing Sonya was trying to comfort her. Ah well, simple minded people. But as she throws her can into the bin, it ricochets off several objects and hit a dog. Run for your lives! Maybe she really is stupid and unlucky after all.

Episode 10
* Yasuna loves playing in the snow. She takes a dive but her life flashes before her. Notice the monkey and flea in it? She should dive in a place with more snow. Yasuna makes a snowman put finds she doesn’t have enough to complete its head and uses her own. Is she going to stay there all day? Turning it into Daruma, Sonya chops it! Yasuna wants to get the icicles on the roof and throws the snowball but all of them drops and nearly hit Sonya. Now she’s going to stab her with it. I can’t believe Sonya missed Yasuna hiding as the snowman.
* Yasuna gathers some snow and eats them! Then she tries to convince Sonya to participate in a snowball fight but she starts throwing knives. Unfair! Illegal. That includes hidden rocks in the snowball or making a knife shape snow. Sonya crushes the snow in her palms to create a deadly projectile. Yasuna thought of creating a diversion to distract her but it backfires. And what’s with that lame pun? A duck to duck? Yasuna kicks the tree but all the snow fell on her. Yasuna thought she manages to kick the hard snowball off Sonya’s hands and as she runs away happily, that hard snowball came falling on her head.
* The duo make quite a number of snowman when Sonya realizes she dropped her wallet inside one of them and is going to smash them all to retrieve it! Genocide! Well, Agiri found it and returned it to the teacher.
* Yasuna catches a cold but is happy she’s not an idiot! Then she tries to pass it on to Sonya but fails miserably. A spray falls out of Sonya and she thinks it’s a sinus spray. Wrong. That’s a pepper spray. Argh!
* Yasuna thinks being sick has lots of benefits. Everyone is being nice to you, you don’t have to go to school and you can eat peaches. So what the hell is she doing in school? Yasuna sleeps on the water pillow and assures Sonya it’s pretty tough and not to hold back while punching it. Well, the water burst out all over her face. Now she’s sicker. She’s confident she’ll get better tomorrow and Sonya will be sick in her place. But the next day, Sonya is well and Yasuna thought she’s an idiot! But she starts coughing. Could it be she has caught her cold? She’s not going to admit it but Yasuna wants to check her temperature using her forehead. She got head-butt instead. Yasuna decides to go home but Sonya sees her playing in the snow outside. On her way home, she sees Yasuna half dead while trying to make a snowman. Idiot.
* Because Yasuna saw kids playing with a remote controller, she brings one to school. Since Sonya won’t be her robot, Yasuna plays with herself (not in the hentai sense lah). She fools around that earns Sonya’s wrath like trying to shoot beams from her eyes and make the baseball float around (it’s tied to a string). Then she pretends controlling a pigeon and coincidentally bombs away its poo nearly hitting Sonya. Pissed off with her, Sonya snatches the controller. Yasuna thought she wants to play too and will gladly be her robot. But when Sonya breaks the controller, it means the robot can’t move, right? Forever…
* Yasuna wants to make origami with Sonya and once again persuades her to join in. She should fold the paper not Yasuna’s palm. Then as they make paper airplane, Sonya’s may look cheap but it’s deadly because it can stab through Yasuna’s! Yasuna used a gold paper and thinks her plane can fly far but it ends up in the bin. Having a contest to see whose plane can fly further, Yasuna thought her silver paper will do the trick but it ends up in the bin while Sonya’s flew out the window. Yasuna shifts the goal post saying she was aiming for the bin and thus her victory. Later as they go home, they see Sonya’s plane still flying about! So it’s about time Yasuna admits she lost. Unknown to them, a bunch of kids are playing paper airplanes nearby.
* Sonya finds a message in her locker to come to the empty classroom. Thinking it’s another assassin trap, she rolls in only to be surprised by Yasuna’s Christmas party surprise. She’s not happy with this annoying prank. Anyway Yasuna wants to have a Christmas party and has brought the necessary stuffs. Agiri also joins them but she’s dressed in a Halloween costume. She wants them to hand over the presents and twists things around that she can’t give things away for free since Christmas is a week away. Since they have to go with the flow, Yasuna reluctantly gives the cake. Agiri returns the cake as her present and Yasuna was easily fooled it was a present from her. After Agiri leaves, it seems the real Agiri pops up from behind wondering who that was. Eh? Another body substitution? Or was she quick enough to run back behind since we see her costume dumped right behind her.
* Though they each have their share of the cake, there is one left. Agiri and Sonya didn’t want it so Yasuna could have it but she’s upset that they should at least pretend that they want it. Then she prepares a bingo game in which the loser must do something embarrassing. Safe to say, Yasuna lost and is prepared to do an embarrassing kneeling that makes her look like a drill tank (she’s wearing a pointy party hat). Too her dismay, they’re not even looking. So much about summoning her courage.
* Yasuna thought Sonya is going to dress as Santa to trick her enemies with the bomb wrapped as a gift. But since nobody would want to accept it, she would cry and the bomb exploded in her face. WTF?! Reimagining it, Sonya as Santa slides down the chimney to deliver presents but gets shot by the father of the house thinking there a burglar has sneaked in.
* Yasuna gives Sonya a doll as her Christmas present so she won’t be lonely for winter break. Unfortunately Sonya disfigures it so Yasuna asks for her Christmas present. She gives back the disfigured doll, enough to make that idiot happy. Till she realizes that’s not it.

Episode 11
* We start off with this twisted version of the folklore of the Bamboo Cutter. Something was glowing in the bamboo which Yasuna the bamboo cutter only told her friend Agiri about a year later. Then it turns out to be a weird New Year’s dream Yasuna is having that Sonya isn’t interested in listening to. Because Yasuna continues to bug her, Sonya strangles her with her own scarf.
* Eating sticky mochi is a must for New Year, right? Sonya heard that though it has no poison, it still can kill. That’s because usually it gets stuck in your throat. But the girls can have a taste of mochi and making it since Agiri has the tools to make them in her club room. Those are ninja tools? I don’t believe it. In the room, they don’t see Agiri so Yasuna starts pounding away. But Agiri is inside the mortar! Body substitution again? Maybe. Because the real one just came in through the door. Because Yasuna teases Sonya about how to handle the mallet, Sonya is going to pound her first. The mallet is too heavy for Yasuna so Agiri has prepared a lighter one. Isn’t that a baby’s toy hammer? So when Yasuna uses it on Sonya instead of the mochi, Sonya uses the real one on her. Lucky her head didn’t get smashed. So it becomes a challenge to see who can make the mochi without the mallet. Of course it goes off track when Yasuna uses a spear and Sonya an axe to pound the former.
* While eating the mochi, Yasuna gets choked. But Sonya thinks she’s playing a fool and thinks she wants to be strangled and obliges. Agiri too may have fallen victim but it seems it’s another body substitution. Substitution of the substitution?
* Another twisted folklore with Sonya as Killtaro (parody of Momotaro). As an assassin, she took on a request to kill demons. Along the way, she meets a dog (Yasuna) who pesters her to be her comrade. Sonya gives her poisoned dumpling millet and good riddance. That mutt will never shut up. Next, Agiri the peasant wants to sell a demon exterminator gun but Sonya’s not interested. Unused Character is going to make her debut as the monkey but it seems Sonya had already left the scene. Sonya reaches the island and cuts a peach to eat. But the island residents (Yasuna clones?) call her a demon for eating the fruits of their labour. I think Sonya just killed them all and everyone lived happily ever after as the island is known as Demon Island. Wait a minute. That wasn’t a happy ending!
* Zombie Baby: Sonya and Yasuna are running away from zombies. Yasuna has some items to dispel the zombies: Cross, garlic and stake. Hey! Aren’t those for vampires?! Stupid Yasuna gets bitten and is now a vampire. Now she’s going to suck Sonya’s blood. Is she a zombie or vampire now? Then the sun rises and all the zombies disintegrate. Are they zombies or vampires?! As stupid as they are! They died stupidly too! Guess what? This was Yasuna’s New Year’s dream.
* Yasuna decides to play some traditional Japanese games. I don’t understand the board game but Yasuna got bored with it since she sucks and turns her attention to kite flying. Sonya knows her trick about asking her what is on the kite (tako), which is a squid (ika). If she says one, Yasuna will definitely say the other and tease her. Sonya has to company Yasuna flying her kite or else she’ll feel lonely and fly her backup kite that has a picture of Sonya instead.
* Yasuna wants Sonya to run for the kite and how did she make her do it? Step on her foot! Oh, now she’s running after her! Yasuna gets tied up by the kite strings as punishment. Sonya demonstrates how to fly a kite and trips. You know what Yasuna will be doing now. Yasuna follows Sonya’s every step, including the tripping.
* As Yasuna flies her kite, the crow attacks it thinking the squid picture is real. To counter that, Yasuna draws a single eye on the squid. Then she sees other kites and decides to go join them. However she got scolded for entangling their strings.
* Yasuna lets Sonya hold her kite while she goes buy warm drinks. The strong wind blows the kite stuck onto the tree. Trying to pull it out made it worse as the string snaps. Yasuna thinks she’s a meanie. Since they can’t get up the tree, Yasuna uses the backup kite but to not make the picture look like Sonya, she draws many eyes over it. Now it just looks creepy. While running along, she falls into the river. Sonya knows the river is shallow and that Yasuna just wanted to pull her in with her cry wolf that she’s drowning. Yasuna goes after the kite flowing down the river when Sonya takes up the string attached to the kite. At the same time, Yasuna pulls the kite and in turn pulls Sonya into the river too.
* To avoid getting pneumonia, they head for the public bath. Sonya is reluctant to strip since there are secrets she can’t reveal. Yasuna thinks there’s a zipper along her body and forces her to strip. The tussle causes Sonya to fall into the pond. In the end, at least they both have a nice warm bath.
* Milky Baby: Yasuna the magical girl always tries her best to help out but makes a mess out of things. Today, she’s supposed to fight Unused Character in a boxing ring (Ashita No Joe parody). She gets beaten up badly and in her final attempt, Yasuna uses her magic wand to summon… A towel? You know what they say about throwing in the towel, right? She lost and got punched by her coach (Sonya). Oh, this is another of her weird New Year dream. On their way home, Yasuna picks up an abandoned magic wand and plays with it. Suddenly Sonya is substituted with Agiri! Woah! Did it work?! And Sonya doesn’t know how she ended up in the locker!

Episode 12
* Sonya is seen sniping and assassinating Pyonsuke! Actually it’s Yasuna’s dream. She is going to have revenge on her for killing Pyonsuke #2 but do you think an idiot can best a pro?
* Yasuna sees a plaster over Sonya’s cheek so the latter warns her not to waste them when she puts one on her own face. Then Yasuna makes a startling discovery. If she puts the plaster on places which she thinks she’ll get hurt, she’ll feel invincible. How did she arrive at that stupid conclusion? She kicks the chair to try out but it hurts like hell. Yasuna listens to Sonya’s advice to put on poultice. Hey. Why does Sonya want to hit her? Sonya says her under-vest is bulletproof and lets Yasuna take a hit. Who knows, the idiot hits her head! She returns the favour instead of hitting the parts applied with poultice. Yasuna punches Sonya’s vest for real but it seems she’s holding in the pain. Did she forget to wear her vest? She wants to have another go but Sonya is grimacing and making faces in preparation of the punch. Sonya tries to bluff her with several theories, law and rule why the vest can only withstand a certain amount of impact but to Yasuna it means she’s not wearing any.
* Based on that, Yasuna deduces if she wears a cast, she’ll be safe. More accurately as Sonya puts it, if she uses her head, she’ll be a lot safer. You mean injury rate is based on IQ? Here comes her stupidity again. She teases Sonya for being dumb, the reason she got hurt and gets a chop on her head. Well, I guess this theory is proving to be right in a certain way. Yasuna tries to run away to avoid getting hurt but trips. If it’s not Sonya, then it’s herself. Next day, Yasuna puts on lots of poultice and feels invincible. A few hours later, she starts feeling itchy all over.
* Sonya’s mission has her been having lack of sleep. She feels so sleepy in class and Yasuna thought it’s her duty as her friend to cheer her up. I guess she was being stupid that’s why it didn’t work. Sonya is so sleepy that she accidentally took out her knife instead of her pen to stab herself! Class is over and she wants to go home but Yasuna stands in her way (she thought Sonya was going to do an assassination job after school). After getting a submission move, Yasuna tries to persuade Sonya that her assassin job is no good and chops her head. Well, Sonya has her eyes opened now. Did she finally realize? Actually she’s now awake to beat her up. But that’s just temporary as she is still sleepy.
* Walking along, Sonya spots Yasuna and makes a run. She uses up too much energy and falls asleep outside someone’s house. Yasuna tries to wake her up without touching her because her defence reflex is still working. Shouting causes the neighbourhood to tell her to STFU, barking like a dog causes her to have bad dreams and when she thought of drawing on her face, Sonya is already up. And mad. Sonya draws on her face as Yasuna tries to tell her the truth that she tried to wake her up. Unfortunately she got punched because she couldn’t believe someone with a stupid face telling her that. Didn’t she draw that herself?
* Yasuna gives Sonya chocolates on Valentine’s Day and tells her she has to give her back 3 times on White Day. Since Yasuna mentions once given, it cannot be returned, Sonya is going to give hers. She attaches chocolate yen on her forehead.
* Yasuna saw Sonya dropped a photo and thought it’s her boyfriend and teases her. However, that’s supposed to be her next hit target! Yasuna screws around by swapping that photo with her own till she eventually gets beaten up. Yasuna is sad that she shouldn’t kill him just because she doesn’t like his face. I don’t think that’s the problem. Yasuna once more tries to persuade to give up her line of work or else she won’t become a splendid person like her. Unless she means splendid is stupid. For starters, Yasuna taps her shoulder from the back and wants her to hold it in. Is it working? I think Tokyo shook just now.
* Noting Sonya gets upset too easily, Yasuna wants her to practice that she won’t get upset from whatever she does. Doesn’t that sound like a penalty game? Yasuna attacks but is instantly nailed. Sonya says she wasn’t attacking but rather defending herself. Haha. You screwed up somewhere Yasuna. The idiot pretends to be an animal, in this case a dog since people should be kinder to animals. But Sonya hates dogs remember? Now remember, little doggie must listen to her master and not eat her lunch when she is told too… So you want to be human again, eh?
* Yasuna launches Pyonsuke #3 for her to hold and have happy feelings. However Sonya hugs it too hard and all the cotton bursts out. I guess that’s the third bunny she killed. Murderer! Sonya wants to use the toilet but Yasuna thinks it’s an excuse to kill his target. She insists she wants to use the toilet for real. But she’ll have to get pass Yasuna. Okay, please go gentle on her.
* Yasuna thinks Sonya should quit being an assassin and be a chiropractor instead. Then she starts having her stupid daydream whereby Sonya attends a patient and accidentally breaks his neck bone. Maybe being a chiropractor isn’t a good idea after all.

Episode 13
* After seeing a TV police show last night, Yasuna wants to play police with Sonya. However she gets beaten up. Obstruction of justice! She thought of using a pair of toy handcuffs to play but Sonya isn’t going to fall for her trick to get cuffed. Since the idiot pesters her to play along, she agrees just to shut her up. Guess what? Yasuna gets cuffed instead. She thinks she can break out using brute strength! Not.
* After getting Sonya to unlock the cuffs with the key, Yasuna now wants her to put it on just for fun. True enough, Yasuna starts mocking Sonya she can’t use her hands. She didn’t see she could use her legs, eh? Kick as powerful as her punch. Sonya feigns extreme pain to strangle Yasuna with the cuffs and threaten her to release them.
* Release she did but she puts the other half of the cuffs on herself. Now they’re stuck together. This also means Sonya can easily beat her up. So as Yasuna tries to unlock it, the key breaks. Well, it’s a toy key so it’s not made of good quality. Sonya tries to chop it with her hands but it causes their heads to butt together. The metal is made of good quality but the key was not? If the metal won’t break, maybe the flesh will… Oh sh*t!
* Since class is starting, Sonya drags Yasuna down the stairs and dirt, right outside so she can break it with a rock. Yasuna moves her hand so Sonya slams the rock on her own hand. She starts chasing her but they’re running around in circles. They tire out and somehow Sonya’s cuff came off. Hooray! Sonya chains Yasuna to the tree and leaves for class. Eh? Yasuna missed class the entire day… Human abuse! Yeah, peace and quiet for the entire day.
* Yasuna asks about Sonya’s birthday and the assassin isn’t too happy to give away anything. Yasuna is appalled that Sonya doesn’t want presents since birthday is a day where you get free stuff legally. She thinks Sonya was picked up by the organization as an abandoned kid or simply forgotten her birthday.
* Yasuna decides to make today Sonya’s birthday, much to the latter’s chagrin. How did she persuade her to go to today’s birthday party? Yasuna has lots of crackers in her clothes and if it all goes off at once, everyone will start thinking Sonya is an idiot like her making a scene.
* In the empty classroom while waiting for Agiri to come, there are a few big boxes with instructions to unwrap and stack them as Sonya’s present. Once that is done, out comes Agiri. Magic show? Sonya doesn’t want to blow the birthday cake candles but upon realizing they’re dynamites, she quickly blows them out with all her might! Phew.
* Yasuna gives her present and Sonya is sceptical it is something dumb. She hears ticking inside and thinks it’s a bomb and throws it out the window. Turns out it was a clock. Anyway that was a dummy present since Yasuna found it in her closet as a broken junk. That’s even worse! Yasuna gives her next present and Sonya thinks it’s a dummy. Heck, there are more presents in the corner. Could it be dummies too?
* Agiri presents Sonya a ninja outfit and has her try it out. Yasuna laughs her ass off since it makes her look like a stereotypical ninja. But that doesn’t mean she can’t do a submission move on the idiot, right?
* The next present is a can of helium gas that makes your voice go high. Yasuna and Agiri demonstrate as they start saying tongue twisters in squeaky voices. Next, Yasuna gives her a piggy bank as a present. Her intention is for her to save up so she can buy her a birthday present. Which is tomorrow. Unused Character heard there was a party but by the time she arrives, it’s over. She sees the helium gas can on the floor and tries it out herself with high pitched tongue twisters.
* Next day, Yasuna is eager for Sonya’s present but it seems she didn’t get any. How much can she save in a day? She gives an excuse that her present is in the empty room so the happy idiot scoots there. Isn’t that the same huge boxes with instructions? Anyway Yasuna puts it in the wrong order and they saw something horrible! What was it? What was it?!
* Sonya can’t walk home with Yasuna since she has a job to do. Yasuna thinks she’s going to kill someone and goes all out to stop her. Idiot style. Even if this means buying and shaking a soda so she’ll get her clothes wet and go home (Sonya just put it in her bag to drink later), challenging her to defeat her (seriously, does she want to feel the pain again?) and throwing her shoes away (Sonya anticipated this and swapped their shoes so Yasuna threw away her own).
* While tailing Sonya, Yasuna sees her talking to a policeman. Is this her next target or is she turning herself in. Yasuna thinks if she does, she’ll be sentenced to 100 years in prison and she doesn’t want that. She confronts the policeman but actually Sonya reported to him about a stalker girl who is bothering her.
* Yasuna continues to follow Sonya and ends up in the woods. She sees an obvious trap with candy inside. Being the idiot she is, she decides to take it knowing well it’s a trap. But the ground caves in instead. So the real trap is a pit? However Yasuna didn’t drop in by herself. She pulls Sonya down with her. Trapped and with no one around to help them out, Yasuna thinks of doing a silly pose so that the future people who dig them up can discover their fossils. WTF?!
* A stray dog passes by and Yasuna tries to make it come back with help. But the dog is going to pee into the hole! They throw everything they got to chase it away. They can’t stand on each other’s shoulder since they know the one who gets out will leave the other behind. Sonya says if she begs and goes down on her knees, she’ll allow her to be on top. Yasuna gladly does so but it’s a trap for Sonya to use her as a springboard and jump herself to freedom.
* Sonya promises to come back with help but Yasuna desperately pleads not to go to her job. She can’t kill somebody since something bad will happen to her. If that happens, she won’t be able to play with her anymore. She can’t tease her, she can’t get hit by her. Er… Did she just admit she loves getting hit? But her tears were so genuine and heart felt that Sonya drops a rope for her to climb out. Unused Character sees a dropped soda and opens it. The water gushes out as she drops into the pit. Well, nobody is going to care about an unused character, right?
* Yasuna and Sonya walk home as she asks about her job. Sonya replies there has been a change of plans and this made Yasuna happy. Yasuna saw something on her shoulder and is about to pick it. Before she knows it, her hand got twisted in the other direction. Has she learnt anything so far?

Baby, I Died Laughing!
Actually, I’m barely alive… Man, I never expected to enjoy this show to the max. Every scene has its potential to make me go into some sort of laughter whether it’s just a tiny grin or a laugh out loud moment that will have me drop rolling on the floor. Except for that touching final scene in which Yasuna really considered Sonya to be her friend. See, friends stick with you thick and thin regardless of your profession. That’s what friends are for, right? Even if it means trying to stop her from doing a dangerous job and the risk of getting done in. I never thought Yasuna was this thoughtful about Sonya’s future but hey, that’s Yasuna for you. So a very big thanks to Yasuna because of her idiot personality and that she never learns from her mistakes, she is the main reason why the show is absolutely hilarious. She’s the kind of dumb blonde (except that she’s a brunette) that everyone will love. You’ll find it hard to hate her because she’s so adorable being dumb. Oh dear. Am I saying that it’s nice to be a dumb girl? Well, let’s just say that you’ll look at dumb girls who don’t learn in a whole new perspective from now on.

Seriously, the way Yasuna gets beaten up, the kind that would make one’s bone break, I thought that she was a masochist. It’s like in every episode, heck in almost every scene, pain is there waiting for her. It’s like Yasuna and the word pain go hand in hand together. Episode after episode, you expect this girl to get hit in some ways and though it may become repetitive, it is never tiresome because of the many ways her plans backfire as she reaps what she sows. Partly it’s because you and me are sadists too… So if Yasuna has not turned into a super masochist pervert, then at least it is good to know that after 13 episodes of near-death experiences and pain, it is safe to say that she can tolerate Sonya’s punishment. That’s both a good thing and bad, right? She might still feel pain but at least it tells us she is only human. Or maybe something is wrong with her brain. Being a simpleton has its benefits too. At times it might seem she wants to have and do sophisticated stuff but notice all she wanted was just to have fun with Sonya? Yeah, doing whatever is just an excuse to be her pal. I don’t even know understand how she and Sonya become friends in the first place. Heck, does Sonya even consider her as a friend? Maybe that last scene proves it. After all, the 2 of them are an extreme of what we call ‘frenemies’. For Sonya, it’s a love-hate relation with that dimwit. I guess with her and the kind of job she does, it’s not good to have friends but if you look at it from another perspective, Sonya should be grateful that Yasuna is her friend. Many would have shunned her and stay as far as possible. But that is considering if they know what Sonya does. But how can an idiot like Yasuna know her job and the rest wouldn’t? I’m sure they are not as dumb as her, right? And also considering that the few assassins that popped up to eliminate Sonya, since they are as incompetent as Yasuna, I guess you can say Sonya is pretty safe as long as she doesn’t slack. She just needs to keep a close watch on her friend, that’s all. For her own sake, that is. And it is also odd that an assassin like her is scared of dogs, bugs and ghost stories. So if you want to be safe from her, just remember to arm yourself with these. You’ll live a little longer…

Complementing the duo is the ever mysterious ninja Agiri. From the way she does things, it makes you wonder if she is a real ninja because she’s been pulling off tactics that would be fitting of a magician or swindler. Yes, she could be a very good and cool con woman if she decides to follow this path. I mean, she has this smooth persuasion to get you into buying so called ninja items, has this tendency to get out of sticky situations albeit just herself and her body substitution… Is that the only real ninja technique she has? Even if it was just an illusion, it’s a pretty damn convincing one and like I said, she should have been a magician or illusionist. So we have a trio in the form of an idiotic high school girl, a grouchy and moody assassin and a ninja scammer. You can’t have a better combination than them, right? Hmm… Did I miss somebody out? Oh! Unused Character. Who is she again? Well, besides being the comic relief and little side distraction that this show probably doesn’t need, I found out that the reason why she wants to seek revenge against Sonya and Yasuna is that she was supposed to be part of the main cast but ‘dropped’ since very much of her personality overlaps with Yasuna. Well, I guess even having two idiots would be a crowd. Yeah, this show is not big enough for two big idiots. Whatever happened to her in the end, we just don’t care. After all, she is an unused character, right? Not like we are bothered with a very minor side character :). Then there is this old guy character. I’m not sure if he is the same guy throughout the series but he seems to be wearing different hats in different scenes. He may be just a senior citizen bumming around in the park or the principal or some store owner. Maybe the producers were trying to save cost and recycle the same unimportant minor character?

Initially I thought Aki Toyosaki was the voice behind Yasuna. Then I later found out that it wasn’t her but somebody that really sounds close to her, Chinatsu Akasaki (Maki Harada in Mouretsu Pirates, Nanami in Sacred Seven). She really did a very good job in making Yasuna the idiot that never learns. Whether it is teasing, in pain or wailing, she sure does put lots of convincing different expressions into the character. Good job. Ai Takabe also did well in voicing Agiri making her sound like a dreamy character. Something I thought Kikuko Inoue could only do better. I believe you will never hear Agiri blowing her top because it’s that soothing and calming voice tone all the way. I guess when you’re a ninja, even you have to deceive your enemies with your voice. A relative unknown, Ai Takabe’s other voice roles include Maiko in Horou Musuko and Fumi Manjoumi in Sweet Blue Flowers. Mutsumi Tamura is the voice behind Sonya (Kio in Asobi Ni Iku Yo, Sayaka Dejima in Seitokai Yakuindomo). I’m not saying her voice is unique but I guess almost anybody can play a girl who is angry half the time. Otherwise, do you think it would really fit to have a high pitch squeaky voice as an assassin? So Sonya having a lower and hoarser voice fits her character description well. Rie Kugimiya also has a role here as Unused Character but due to the character’s limited screen time, I feel it’s a waste for her to use her squeaky bratty tsundere voice that we won’t hear often (unless you’re not a Rie Kugimiya fan of course). Nevertheless, it’s still fun to see her voice the character. Before watching this show, I read Satomi Arai was going to have a role in this anime and thought gee, I guess she’ll be Yasuna because knowing her roles as Shirai in To Aru Kagaku No Railgun, Naoko in Yuri Seijin Naoko-san and that emotionless but scheming reporter in Seitokai Yakuindomo, Ranka Hata, maybe she’ll get the lead role as an idiot. However she ended up as the female narrator or as the credits put her, Et Cetera Girl (any extra female characters in the show are voiced by her). So she didn’t get to flex her mischievous and perverted voice and reduced to short narrating roles. But she’s still identifiable nevertheless. For all other male narrations and extra characters, Et Cetera Boy role goes to Cho (Brook in One Piece).

The opening theme is the same name as this series, Kill Me Baby by the duet of Yasuna and Sonya’s seiyuu. To me, the song felt like it’s suitable for a chase scene through the Arabic streets. I don’t know, that’s what I feel this upbeat and wacky song is. Maybe crazy is the right word. The lyrics are really odd and even if they are about killing, dying and other nonsensical stuffs, the words “Kill Me Baby” that is being sung repetitively throughout the song somewhat made me have goosebumps. In short, I don’t really like this song. Maybe it’s the way the duo shout those 3 words. And if the song isn’t crazy enough for you, the animation is even crazy as we have Sonya fighting aliens, UFO crashing, Agiri clones and Yasuna doing her best as a useless idiot. Thus I prefer the ending theme more which sounds very much like a techno disco dance. Also sung by the same duo, what makes Futari No Kimochi No Honto No Himitsu amusing is the dance that we see Yasuna and Sonya tap to in the ending credits. Be warned that even if you are tempted to attempt some of the infectious moves to the infectious catchy beat, there are some moves that are impossible to do! You have been warned. Trying to imitate them may result in more than just broken bones, muscle aches, embarrassing failed poses and damaged egos. I know because I nearly fell in to that. Hmm… Maybe I should try again because somebody once said if you don’t first succeed, try, try and try again. Haha, I just realized I was being stupid here. Even the lyrics are plain weird. “I love you to a point that I want to kill you”. Is this what her hidden feelings are?

On a trivial note, the narration of the next episode preview feels like a haiku only with lots more syllables. And a lot longer. Since I’m not the kind of person who appreciates poems, what they are saying are like Greek to me. In the sense that I just do not understand what they are getting at. Although what I know it is being narrated are events that are supposed to happen or encounter in the next episode, I just can’t seem to put it all together. Maybe I’m that stupid, huh? It always ends with the narrator asking Yasuna what she will do next. Well, what do idiots always do? For her, she takes the bull by the horn, crosses the bridge only when she gets there and whatever happens, happens, she takes them all in good and bad (usually more of the latter). Another amusing narration part is when the narrators narrate the “Kill Me Baby” title. After that when they narrate “Baby, Please Kill Me”, they say it full of passion and accent that it sounds funny and odd. Weird indeed.

They better come up with another season because I really want to see more pranks Yasuna can pull off. In this sense I guess you can consider her a creative girl, right? Just that she uses her creativity for wrong purposes. But that’s not entirely a bad thing since she manages to bring in the laughter. Now, what more practical jokes can Yasuna come up just to test Sonya’s patience? An eating contest? Visit to the old folk’s home? A kidnap incident? An alien invasion? Even a normal school field trip would suffice. Seems for this season, everything that has happened takes place in their high school or the neighbourhood. So if they do another season, it would be nice to have a change of scenery as well. Another reason why you should respect Yasuna is because of her perseverance. No doubt that it is bad to want to tease and get the better of your friend despite knowing you will lose 99.99%. But it’s not always impossible, right? Even so, please do not imitate and try it out on your friends, okay? They may not be so highly skilled or ‘forgiving’ like Sonya. I don’t want to go so far as to say that after seeing this series, my intelligence level has dropped after too many dumb moments with Yasuna nor my defence for pranks has increased after observing Sonya’s counter attacks. After all, I’m not such an intelligent person in the first place. What do you expect from a typical mild otaku like me? If that is such a bad thing in other people’s view, then I don’t want to be smart ;p. But after watching this show, I have learnt something important: Never approach an assassin from the back, a ninja head on and an idiot from all directions!

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